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eden031 · 2 months ago

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First meetings

Part 1 , Part 2

Pairing: Jack Abbot x female!intern!reader

Warnings: age gap (reader is mid 20’s, Jack mid/late 40’s), cursing, medical inaccuracies, misogyny (by one of the patients), mentions of suicide attempt (of a patient), mentions of child injury (of a patient), Jack Abbot is emotionally constipated, jealous!Jack Abbot, night shift shenanigans

Summary: After agreeing to do Dr. Robby a favour and transfering to the night shift she has to face that working with Dr. Jack Abbot might not be the easiest.

A/N: Soooooo we are so back baby. I am already working on a part three for this and in all honesty I might make this a longer series. Also Robby might be a bit ooc, but I wanted him to be kind of the ED dad, so here we are. Writing this is actualy so fun, though this part is more there to set up the next parts and get the story moving. Another thing is I made a playlist for the vibes, so if you are interested just click HERE

For two weeks she had successfully avoided Dr. Jack Abbot, well avoiding him was the wrong term: she had practically fled the area every time she had spotted him and if she had to go near him it was only if Whitaker or Mel were with her. Talking to him alone would probably make her brain short circuit within the matter of half a minute. Still she had tried to be as subtle as possible about it, never going too fast or just turning on her heel without apparent reason and from her perspective she had done an outstanding job at pretending to everyone around her that she was not avoiding him.

She had promised herself to be angry at him if she ever saw him again, that promise had been made about two weeks after their first meeting, between drinks and pizza shared with her roommate. Yet once these hazel eyes found her she was just putty and it scared her. Hell she had not even reacted to her first real boyfriend like this, she had never reacted to anyone like this. The only reason why she had been able to be angry at him or at least snappy was that she had been incredibly hangry and would probably have snapped at a lot of people in that state when she had met him in the Pitt, and there was probably also some shock to it.

The shift was finally coming to an end, she had thought that her first shift had been grueling, but this shift, the first shift in her third week in the Pitt, had probably been worse, there had been a pile up on the interstate and all victims were brought to the PTMC. There were about ten people severely injured and twenty six more minorly injured, it had been all hands on deck and the interns and med students had been left to make sure that the people with minor injuries were treated quickly.

That had kept them busy the entire day while they still had to deal with the usual flow of patients. Glancing at the clock she saw that it was seven thirty, the shift was officially over, though she could not leave yet. Dr. Robby had asked to talk to her, something that was strange in and of itself, usually if an attending wanted something from an intern like herself they would talk to the senior residents first. Shaking her head she ran her hand over her face, hoping that it wouldn’t take too long and that it wasn‘t something too serious. Afterall she had a date with a hot bath and left over lasagna. Watching as most of the other day shift staff was leaving she let out a low grumble of discontent.

“Sorry that took so long,” the voice of Dr. Robby caught her attention, just waving her hand in the air she shook her head.

“No worries,” the issue had not been that she had to wait for him. The issue was that the waiting had induced some anxiety in her, wondering what the hell the man could possibly want from her.

“So,” he sighed, rubbing the back of his head, he stood hunched over, an almost guilty expression on his face, “I need to ask you something,“ he sounded so guilty and unsure that she was beginning to get really worried. It sounded like he was fighting with his inner moral compass. „Usually interns and med students stay on day shift, but due to the issue with Dr. Langdon not being with us anymore and there being four people we somehow need to make sure stay supervised most of the time it‘s a bit much,“ he looked at her with those big brown puppy eyes of his that made him look about ten years younger than he actually was. At least now she knew in which direction this was going. He was about to continue with his explanation of the situation as she decided that she would just address the elephant in the room.

„So one of us needs to change to the night shift?“ she asked, tilting her head slightly. Dr. Robby sighed, his hand going back to the back of his head, scratching awkwardly.

„You don‘t have to, but it would lighten the workload on everyone and make Gloria happy,“ well there it was, there was the reason Dr. Robby seemed to feel so bad about asking this. It was probably Gloria being a pain in the ass and bugging him about it.

She knew why he had asked her specifically. Bridgit had taken a liking towards her, some had started calling Bridgit her work mom. The older woman always checked in on her during shift change, always made sure she had eaten something before leaving the hospital. Dr. Ellis and Dr. Shen also seemed to like her, from what she knew she was one of the people from the day shift that chatted the most with them, she and Dr. Ellis had even had coffee together once. They had coincidentally met in the same coffee shop and decided that it would be a good idea to have their coffee together. Still there was one question that burned on her mind now.

„Did you talk to Dr. Abbot about this already?“ she asked carefully, trying to gauge how far this process had already gone.

„Yes, but not only you.“ Dr. Robby paused, „I talked to him about the four of you,“ the four of you probably being Santos, Whitaker, Javadi and herself. „He told me that he would be glad if you joined his team,“

That almost knocked the air out of her, butterflies in her stomach doing happy little flips. She had thought that Dr. Abbot would be unhappy about her coming to the night shift, hell she would have thought that he might even tell Dr. Robby that he did not want her around him at all.

„I just have to ask: what did you tell him? It‘s not like I performed a damn RABOA in the field like Santos did, or even worked through the MCE like the others,“ she glanced at the floor, it was a genuine question, the others had a lot more experience and confidence thanks to that. She heard him sigh, cringing internally, knowing that this was probably a bad idea. Before she was able to tell him to forget it he spoke in that kind and gentle voice he used when talking to patients when he knew they were feeling uncomfortable or scared.

„You know that it is not always about what a person has already done, right?“ he gave her a small but kind smile, „There is a lot of potential I see in the way you work,“ he paused, „Do you still remember the unresponsive kid that came in last week?“ There had been a few unresponsive kids last week, but she knew exactly which one he was referring to.

She nodded silently, it had been scary to see that kid, not older than four that had apparently taken a tumble while playing with his brother and was unresponsive afterwards. She had asked one of the nurses if someone had already checked his glucose levels because she had looked into the chart and not seen anything regarding them. Apparently everyone had forgotten to do that, the worry of a little boy having taken a tumble while playing with his brother was too great, everyone focused on the fall, though his blood glucose level had actually explained the tumble and the unresponsiveness.

„Or the veteran suicide attempt?“ Dr. Robby asked.

That one had hurt her so badly, the man had survived four tours, then just a week after he had come back from his fourth tour his wife and daughter had been hit by a drunk driver, both dying on sight. She had been one of the people that had initially treated him and also been the person to get him to calm down with what she was saying he had been alert and very aware of what was happening. Afterwards she had always checked in with him, in his attempt he had lost both of his legs above the knee, recommended him a support group for veterans in the most gentle way possible, one she had been told about by a friend of hers from med school. After he had been able to get a bed upstairs she started visiting him after her shifts, always having tea or coffee with him before she headed home completely.

„Yeah, of course,“ she nodded, she hadn‘t worked here long enough that cases would start blending together.

„That is why Abbot wants you on his team,“ he paused, „It‘s because you care, you pay attention and yet somehow work quickly,“ he shook his head, „To be honest I am not too happy with letting you go.“ a friendly smile on his face.

——————————

After that conversation she could never have refused Dr. Robby. So that was how she had ended up at the ED, at six fifty in the evening with two huge boxes of donuts balanced in her arm as she tried to put her backpack into one of the lockers. Pressing the door shut she looked around, the stethoscope resting against her neck, this time she had opted for a long sleeved thermos underneath her scrubs, from what Bridgit had told her the ED could sometimes get cold during the night, even if the AC was running. People from the day shift were already filtering out, apparently for once shift change had gone smoothly and people could pack up and leave the PTMC on time.

Suddenly Dr. Shen appeared from behind her, in one hand his coffee, the other one tangled in his badge.

“Precious cargo you have there,” he gave her a slight grin as they continued to walk towards the entrance to the Pitt. The donuts slowly got heavier in her arms as the door leading into the organised chaos of the Pitt came closer. She could feel her heart hammering in her ribcage as they walked together, she would have to face Dr. Abbot today and she knew that she needed to stay focused on the job.

“Thought that I could bring them as a bribe so that you go easy on me,” she joked as he held the door open for her so that she could slip into the hallway, luckily the next door was the staff break room. Dr. Shen laughed as he shook his head slightly.

“Abbot never goes easy on the newbies,” he continued to slurp on his coffee. A slight shiver ran down her back as she thought of his warm and steady hands guiding her through a procedure. Shaking her head she quickly deposited the two boxes holding 25 donuts each onto the table in the breakroom, the sticky note still attached to them, a little note she had written wishing everyone a good shift.

“Great,” the sarcasm was dripping from her mouth as they turned to head towards the nurses’ station. Dana was still there, talking to Bridgit, who seemed to be extremely focused on the info Dana was giving her. She looked around, seeing Dr. Robby and Dr. Abbot talking to each other, Dr. Ellis standing beside them, nodding along.

Dr. Shen was approaching the group of Doctors, his coffee still securely clasped in his hand, she trailed behind him, glancing around, trying to see if there were still people from the day shift there that she could say hi to.

“Shen, finally,” Ellis greeted the junior attending that now stopped his rapid approach, moving to stand in the circle of people.

“You have looked better before,” he commented in a teasing tone as he slurped his drink, she crossed her arms over her stomach, doing her best not to look at Dr. Abbot who seemed to have his attention on the board more than anything else. She could feel the crackle of tension between them spark up again, it was unnerving as she stood there, waiting to be told what she was going to be doing during this shift.

“Yeah, no shit,” Ellis gave Shen an annoyed glance, “Olsen called in sick half an hour ago, can’t get a replacement in at this time,” she muttered. A sigh escaped her lips, realising that this would mean they were probably going to be in a bit of trouble, she had asked around a bit before her transfer and she had learned that Dr. Olsen was an R2 on the night shift.

“Ah great, but we got our intern now,” Shen patted her on the back. “And she brought donuts,” he announced, with that statement the mood of Dr. Ellis seemed to shift slightly.

“Chocolate glaze?” she asked with hopeful eyes.

Nodding she smiled slightly at the senior resident of the night shift. It already felt more familiar in this setting, maybe it was also because Santos was not bugging her the entire time.

“Chocolate glaze with chocolate sprinkles, got them specifically for you” she nodded, along to the silent glee spreading on the face of the senior resident. Dr. Robby laughed softly, giving her a quick smile.

“Alright, I am heading out of here, have a good shift,” with which her old attending disappeared somewhere in the depths of the Pitt, Dr. Ellis followed close behind, probably going to grab a donut. Standing there with Shen, who was still slurping his coffee, which was slowly getting on her nerves, and Dr. Abbot, who still had to address her, was slightly unnerving. Suddenly her name cut through the silence like someone had dropped a glass, it had been her last name, but it still sent a shiver down her spine as she looked at Dr. Abbot who was now directly looking at her, those hazel eyes focused on her and only her.

“Yes?” She tried to sound professional, but her voice came out in a quiet squeak, tilting her head slightly and she cleared her throat. Secretly hoping that it was good enough of a cover up for her squeak. He uncrossed his arms, the muscles in his forearms flexing slightly as he moved, his biceps flexing.

“You think you can handle the wound care cases on your own?” he asked, his eye contact never wavering, not even a little bit. At first she had thought it to be incredibly attractive, the way he always made sure to have eye contact with the person he was talking to, but now it flustered her, especially since her mind went back to how intensely he had looked at her when he hovered above her. She nodded courtely, watching as he seemed to think about something, his eyes drifting away from hers, lower on her body, she knew that if she moved now Shen would definitely notice it, “Also check in on the waiting room, bring back the more serious cases you spot, someone will take a look at them then.”

“Understood,” she could feel the heat rising to her face as she saw his eyes drifting off again, it felt like something began to crackle between them, suddenly he snapped his head up as Bridgit called his name. As he began to head towards her he turned slightly while walking.

“Oh and Josie will be helping you!” he pointed at an older nurse who was currently busy talking to Myrna who was sitting by one of the charting stations.

“Got it!” she muttered under her breath and headed off towards the waiting room, deciding to check out the situation there, evaluating how long it would take to get rid of the backlog from the day.

Most of the shift until a certain point was spent stitching up cuts, getting glass out of wounds, then getting them stitched up as well, treating minor burns and all that belonged to wound care. Josie was extremely helpful and made for great company, meaning that every single conversation with a patient became somehow amusing or at least not a complete disaster. She had just finished up a small head wound that needed two stitches when Dr. Ellis had swung by, telling her that the waiting room was practically empty now, something that was a huge relief. The only person left to be treated, who was currently being brought to the back, was a man that was slightly agitated from the wait and had cut his hand open while cutting an avocado.

As she stepped out of the room from the man with the cut on his head, who would be discharged in about half an hour, the cut had been from nothing serious and keeping him for observation was simply going to block the room. She heard an angry voice coming from one of the rooms, waiting for a moment Josie came out of it, shaking her head.

“Was that the guy that cut his hand when trying to cut an avocado?” she asked as she fell into step with Josie, she wanted to get the discharge papers for the man with the head injury ready before going into patching up the man with the cut on his hand.

“Yes, and I am telling you sweetheart, take either Dr. Shen or Dr. Abbot with you when you go in there, or maybe Nico or Tommy, but for your sake and my conscience don’t go in there alone,” Josie gave her a pointed look, her gray hair pulled back with a claw clip.

“That bad?” she cringed internally as she continued to head towards the nurses’ station. Josie nodded softly.

“I think the only reason he didn’t insult me or try to punch me was because I gave him some pain meds,” she sighed, shaking her head softly, “People these days.”

After getting the discharge forms ready she started looking for someone to take into the room with the patient. Seeing Tommy, one of the nurses leaning against the other side of the nurses’ station, quickly getting up she moved over to him, not wanting to bother him, but knowing that she needed to get this cut out of the way before the late night falls started coming in, Josie had told her that that time was approaching rapidly and she wanted to take a breather before those came in.

“Of course,” he nodded after she had explained the situation, walking towards the room she felt her heart beginning to hammer in her chest. During the day shift she had already experienced various disgusting behaviour from patients, but never had she feared for her actual personal safety during these times.

“Fucking finally,” was the first thing the man said as she entered the room. Taking a deep breath she greeted the man and started to prep for the suture.

“Mind telling me why the nurse is going to stitch me up, Doc?” the man asked as she put on the nitrile gloves, he was looking over at Tommy, who had taken a seat on the other side of the patient, getting all her suture materials ready.

“Because she is the Doctor and I am the nurse,” Tommy responded dryly, his voice was low and gruff, though he was clean shaven and she could only describe him as smooth looking.

“Gotta be kidding me, letting women do all kinds of shit nowadays,” she glanced at Tommy, Tommy glanced at her, their conversation did not need words. She needed to figure out now if it was safe for her to patch him up or if she should just call Shen or Abbot and get them to do it. Well she knew that Abbot would probably be annoyed when he was called away from his case, if she had caught it correctly a few moments ago there was a big trauma heading their way, meaning that neither he nor Shen would be available anyway.

“You will have to live with it,” she said with humour lacing her voice. She explained the procedure to him and as she started to inject the lidocaine into the palm of his hand after checking for nerve or tendon damage she heard one word very clear and very loudly coming from him.

“BITCH! You fucking bitch!” he practically hollered as she continued to inject the lidocaine, not taking it to heart, even though she knew he was actively cursing her out, not just shouting in pain, she continued. Finally she was done and soon was able to start stitching the cut shut. The man continued to grumble about her and her stitching, but the look she and Tommy shared made the entire procedure a lot more bearable.

The end of the procedure couldn’t come soon enough for her, especially not after she had given him a few instructions on wound care and having to come back to get the stitches removed. He had given her one last harsh glare, muttered something about her sleeping with her boss to get where she was, then took the discharge papers Josie had thankfully gotten ready while she was working and left.

Now sitting at the nurses’ station she felt a little uncomfortable, she knew that no one knew about her very first encounter with Dr. Abbot, but the words of the man had hit a nerve, trying to shake it she took a sip from her tea. The trauma case was now upstairs and there was a lull in the buzz of the Pitt.

“So what do you think about getting coffee before tomorrow’s shift?” Tommy asked as he leaned back in the chair beside her, his eyes gleaming softly in the light. A small grin on his lips, she licked her lips nervously. There was a moment where she hesitated, but then she decided that it might be a good idea.

"Yeah, why not!” she smiled at him, leaning back in her chair as well, suddenly a crack sounded through the low hum of the Pitt. She felt the back of her chair fall and she tumbled to the ground, the laughing started before anything else. Tommy hoovering by her side also started laughing as she held up the broken back piece of the chair.

As her laughter died down she glanced over to the side of the station where she felt like a dark storm cloud was brewing. Abbot stood there, his thick arms crossed, watching the interaction with an expression she could only describe as disapproving, still laughing slightly she raised her eyebrow at him, he simply walked away. Even if she did not want to admit it, a stinging sensation of hurt settled in her chest as she watched him walk from her away again.

——————

Tags: @antisocialfiore

#the pitt #the pitt x reader #the pitt fanfiction #dr jack abbot x reader #dr jack abbott #jack abbot x female reader #jack abbot x reader #jack abbot #michael robinavitch #dr robby #dr jack abbot x you #dr jack abbot fanfic

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augustinamiaumiau · 2 months ago

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LN5 SPOILERS-The second hairpin

After Maomao agrees to participate at the banquet as Lahan’s relative she returns to her room where she finds a tailor. She assumes it’s Lahan’s doing.

When the tailor leaves she sits on the bed where she obverves a box.

When she opens it she discovers a hair stick.

“For just a moment, she thought that somehow the silver hair stick she had never expected to see again had managed to return to her”

Maomao knows it’s from Jinshi because it looks very similar to the one he gifted her.

Maomao describes it as a “lovely piece, carved with the image of the moon and flowers-and poppies. Lovely, yes, but Maomao grinned as she realized what the poppies meant.”

Poppy seeds is Chinese Culture represent passion and deep love and Maomao knows it.

“She went ahead and put the stick in her hair, just because. Strangely, it felt rather fitting, and the way she continued to wear the accessory thereafter was perhaps rather unlike her.”

With the knowledge of who gave it to her and what it means she decides to wear it. She feels like it fits her and keeps wearing it which is “unlike her”-highlighting what a big deal this is.

At the banquet Rikuson remarks the hair stick and how beautiful it is.

Maomao is not ready or emotionally equipped to acknowledge its significance or talk about it so she makes up a reason why Rikuson might seem intersted in it which also solves the “mystery” of why some noble women were glancing at her hair.

“Maomao remembered she was still wearing the hair stick from the paulownia-wood box. It wasn’t flamboyant, but even the untutored eye could tell it was of fine make. Maomao had thought she’d detected the more well-bred young ladies in the room occasionally glancing, and now she understood why.”

The next night Lahan takes a dig at Maomao

“Well,” Lahan said, eyeing her. “They say clothes make the man, but apparently the same doesn’t go for women. At least some of them.”

“Shut up.”

Which trigger an unusual moment of insecurity in her.

“Maomao was dragging a heavy skirt behind her. The outfit, like the meal, was western-style, more or less. Not exactly the same-it hadn’t been possible to get something like that ready-but the silhouette, the overall look, was similar, including the bone hoop that went around her waist to puff out the skirt. It was also the style with western dresses to squeeze the waist and shop the top half of the cleavage for emphasis-but sadly, Maomao didn’t have much to show off, and lest she embarrass herself, she instead wore a long-sleeved top, submitting only to having her waist cinched about with a belt.

They did her hair too, somewhat; it was put up in a rather showy manner, but ultimately the stylists were limited by the material. It was better than it had been, perhaps, but it suffered by the truly resplendent comparisons present at the banquet. She looked like a stalk of shepherd’s purse among a field of roses and peonies.”

Maomao sees herself as inferior to these noble women appearence wise. She sees herself as an ugly plant while she compers them to beautiful flowers. She doesn’t want to show her cleavage to not emberass herself because she doesn’t have a big chest, it doesn’t matter what she’s wearing because in her head she’ll forever be lacking compared to them.

But.

There’s one thing that makes her feel better.

“Just one thing helped calm her in this otherwise unfamiliar and unsuitable ensemble: a fine silver hair stick.”

The hairpin calms her down because it’s proof that she has something these women don’t, but wish to have: a hairstick from the Moon Prince. She is the chosen one, they aren’t.

Later when Rikuson invites her to dance he tries to remind her that she’s not a “desinterest third party. Never forget the import of what you wear on your head.”

It wasn’t her choice to go to the Western Capital and she only reculantly agreed to participate at the banquet as a lady of the La clan because Lahan convinced her to, but to wear that hairpin was her decision, nobody else’s.

#kusuriya no hitorigoto #the apothecary diaries #jinmao #maomao #jinshi #lahan #rikuson #ln5

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rosenclaws · 3 months ago

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I See the Light || DOFP!Logan x Reader

Summary: Logan saved the future but now he doesn't feel like he fits into the mansion anymore. He doesn't know what he needs but he just knows he needs a break. So Charles sends him on a mission that changes his whole world.

warnings: fem!reader (she/her pronouns used), abusive parents (Not descriptive), injury, reader deals with a jerk and logan saves the day, swearing

wc: 6k

a/n: Sooo I might have fucked around and wrote 6k words today. This is my entry for @princessanglophile birthday writing challenge! I was given dofp logan and I see the Light from Tangled. I was so so excited to get this song as its one of my favorite disney songs and I'm so happy that I was able to finally get the story that's been in my head in writing. This fic very very loosely follows the plot of tangled but only in a few ways. I really hope it lives up to the song and I was able to do it justice. Enjoy!!

If there was one word to describe how Logan felt after coming back from 1973. It would be lost. He wouldn't say it himself, in fact he'd insist he was just fine. I mean the plan worked, he went back and he saved everyone. Who wouldn't be thrilled to come back to a peaceful world?

But in doing so Logan sacrificed everything. His friends, his family, they don't remember him.

They only know this timeline version of Logan. So now he's a stranger to them and they're strangers to him. He wakes up and teaches his classes but he doesn't know these students.

He sees Rouge and Bobby and he can't help but think of the timeline where Rogue took the cure and lost all her powers. Seeing Kitty all grown up and teaching the new generation of mutants. Storm being the leader he always knew she could be. And of course. Jean. She was alive in this world and so was Scott. It had been years since he saw them.

He doesn't know how to feel. He's found and lost those closest to him. After all of this, he just needs a break. To find himself and learn to stop fighting. He doesn't have to anymore but the rest of him hasn't caught up with that sentiment.

"Logan, I have a mission for you." Charles has called him into his office. He can sense Logan's unease and despite helping him regain some memory from this timeline he knows that Logan is struggling.

"While this world is not as violent as you remember, there are a few anti mutant sentiments still lingering throughout the country." He hands Logan manilla folder.

"She's been raised her whole life in hiding. Her parents forced her at a young age. You need to find her and bring her back.

"And exactly how am I going to do that? If she's in hiding?" Logan asks, flipping through the little information he's been giving.

"Don't tell me you've lost your touch." Charles says with a smirk. Logan shuts the folder and tosses it back at Charles.

"Give me a week."

"This will be good for you Logan. Be patient with her." Logan nods and turns his back to leave.

"One more thing, Take your time Logan." Charles gives him a look that Logan doesn't quite understand and just nods.

After throwing a few things into a backpack he slings it over his shoulder and silently weaves through the mansion. He sees a few people in the kitchen, laughing over cups of coffee and stories of their students. His heart tugs as he looks away, he has a mission to complete.

He doesn't even say goodbye.

Swiping Scotts keys he hops into one of the many cars in the garage. The only information Charles really had was that she was located across the country.

For days Logan drives through the mountains and plains of America. It's a little weird to be honest. He remembers the world turning to a complete wasteland. Nothing but death and destruction. He never once looked at a field of grass while driving down the interstate and thought anything but how boring the view was. Now things are a little different.

After hopping from shitty motels and diners with sweet waitresses and heart stopping food he finally makes it to where Charles said you were. It's a small beach down on the coast of California. Of all the places to be trapped this isn't the worst he thinks as he parks his car at some motel.

The front desk worker barely paid attention as he handed Logan the keys to his room and a brochure of everything the town had to offer. Which was two restaurants and the beach. Realistically he knows you wouldn't be anywhere in town. Too many people. Probably somewhere on the outskirts of town. He slips into a bar, ordering a glass of whiskey and pokes around. Asking the already drunk locals about the weird parts of town. Any strange people.

After some teeth pulling conversations with a woman who was clearly trying to get in his pants, he manages to get information about this house on top of a hill about five miles out of town. How the kids think it's haunted and only a lone woman lives there. The windows are boarded and a wire fence blocks any trespassers.

Bingo.

Apparently the woman leaves every three days at dawn and doesn't return until night and luckily for him she should be leaving tomorrow morning.

With a cigar in hand Logan stares out at the ocean, he doesn't know what time it is but he knows he can't sleep. His dreams are still plagued with watching his friends die. He just can't shake them off, even if that's not how things are anymore.

At the first sight of light peeking over the horizon he hops into his car and drives towards the lone cabin. He ditches the car about two miles in and walks the rest of the way. The sky is painted pinks and purples as he reaches the small cabin.

He catches two unfamiliar scents as he nears. One makes his eyes water, it's rotten. The other is much sweeter, like fresh flowers and honey. The door opens and Logan jumps behind a tree. The sound of footsteps and a car ring loud in his ears. He moves like an animal as he blends himself in with the foliage.

Once the car is gone he hurries past the fence. Cutting through it with ease and making his way into the cabin. He doesn't see anything as he enters. The lights are turned off and everything seems in order.

"Hello?" He calls into the dark house. His nose twitches as that floral scent invades his nose again. He closes his eyes and his hearing zones in on a heartbeat. It's beating faster and faster.

His eyes snap open and he turns around, grabbing your wrist that was inches above his back. In your hand was a crude excuse for a knife. Your eyes are wide and full of fear, your hands trembling in his grasp.

"There you are kid," Logan plucks the knife from hand with no fight and tosses it onto the counter.

"W-Who are you?" You try and tug your wrist away but he's too strong.

"Logan. Now I'm here to get you out of this place." He expects this, fear or uncertainty is common. But you he's never had someone try and attack him before. He wonders what your powers are.

"No." You say making Logan raise an eyebrow.

"I can't leave. She said they'd hurt me."

"Hurt you?" He lets go of your wrist and you slink back to the corner of the room. He wonders just want your mother has told you. He sighs and sits down on one of the dining room chairs.

The look on his face makes you shiver. He's so. Intense. No smile, no soft words. Like he could careless if you went with him or not.

"Why did they send you?" You ask and Logan just shrugs.

"I'm a people person." He says in a deadpan voice. You don't say anything back and Logan slowly lets his so called "angry" face shift to something else. You're probably scared and he's not great with people but he does want to help.

"Look I don't know what she told you, but I can promise that you don't deserve to be locked up from the world." He says and you lower your head.

"I know you're scared, but I'm just like you." He unsheathes his claws making you jump.

"There's this place, a home for people like us where we can be safe and you can learn to control whatever powers you have." You look down at your hands. Still uncertain about all of this.

Your mother had kept you here your whole life, forcing you to never use your powers. Telling you that the world hates what you are and to be lucky she hasn't fed you to the wolves already. Honestly you don't know why she keeps you around, but its true. You can't protect yourself from whatever is out there.

But this man, Logan. He seems like he's taken care of himself just fine. Not a single scratch on him. Maybe he can protect you too.

Your heart has longed for so much more than whatever this life has been so far. The books you read don't hold a candle to the real thing. Could he really take you to a place that's safe.

"Come with me and if you don't want it, if you don't like it. I'll take you back home." He offers, seeing the swirling emotions in your eyes.

"Promise?" You ask softly.

"Promise." Logan sticks his hand out. You glance down at it. It feels too good to be true but this could be your chance to leave this house, to be yourself. But your mother? Honestly, she'd be happy with you gone. Would she come after you or rejoice that her one problem is gone?

Guess you'll have to find out. You reach out and take Logan's hand, hoping you didn't just make a big mistake.

Logan doesn't waste much time heading back home. He takes you back to the motel and tells you to wait in the car while he packs his stuff and checks you. You've never been in a car before. Of course you knew what they were but being inside one was different.

Curiosity gets the best of you as you open every compartment and press every button you can see. You press something the car makes a noise making you jump. You press it again and again before Logan pulls the door open.

"Hey, quit fucking with the horn." He grumbles as gets into the drivers seat.

"Sorry." You apologize, putting your hands in your lap and looking down at them.

You're silent for a while. Not moving, not speaking a word. Logan keeps sneaking glances at you, guilt slowly building as you don't even look out the window.

When Charles said you were sheltered, he didn't realize you were this sheltered. He thinks back to what Charles said before he left. Patience. He's still working on that one.

"I didn't mean to snap at you." Logan says making you look up at him. Your head tilting in confusion.

"You really never been in a car?" He asks as he turns his attention back to the road.

"No, my parents wouldn't let me. I had to stay inside. I couldn't leave." You say quietly.

"You were pressing on the horn, you don't want to use it often. Only to get someone's attention or when someone's being a jackass." You nod your head, watching the other cars driving.

Suddenly Logan swears as a car cuts too close in front of him. He slams his hand on the horn and swerves around the car. He speeds up, glaring at the driver and throwing up his claws in a threatening manner.

"Like that?" You ask. Logan looks at you and lets out a small laugh.

"Yeah, like that."

He drives a little while longer before stopping for gas. He hands you a twenty and tells you to grab some snacks as he fiddles with the machine. You're too shy to tell him you've never been in a store before so you take the money and head in.

It's like a wonderland of sweets and food. You're mom didn't let you have anything like this. In fact she never even told you about half the things on the shelves. You had read about candy and soda in the books she'd bring you but that was it.

You grab anything you can carry. You're too wrapped up in the overwhelming options that you don't see the man in front of you. You bump into him and send both of your things to the ground. The drink in his hand spilling onto his shirt.

"I'm so sorry!" You squeak as you the man turns around and glares at you.

"Watch where you're fucking going." He snaps making your eyes widen.

You reach down and try to pick up the fallen items but he grabs onto your wrist. This isn't the same as when Logan did it. Logan was firm but gentle while this man was angry.

"You're hurting me." You try tugging yourself free but its no use. The mans grip tightens on your wrist. Suddenly the man is ripped away from you and thrown onto the ground.

"Get the fuck off her!" Logan growls. He stands tall above the man, a pissed off look on his face.

"She ran into me!" The man scrambles to his feet, trying to puff his chest out to stand toe to toe with Logan but it's a feeble attempt.

"Stupid bitch." Logan grabs onto his shirt and slams him into the shelf, uncaring if things fall.

"Listen here bub, you get the fuck out of here and take your cheap gas station coffee with you." Logan lets go of him and grabs the coffee cup.

Slamming it into his chest with force. You watch, afraid to even move as Logan pushes the man out of his way. He scrambles out the door, yelling something that you can't quite understand. Logan turns to you and your eyes start to well with tears.

"I'm so sorry I didn't mean to cause all this I-"

"Hey, stop crying." Logan grabs your arms and waits for you to calm down. "It was an accident. That asshole isn't worth crying over alright?" He grabs all he fallen snacks and brings them to the counter.

The poor cashier couldn't even look Logan in the eye as he pays. Too afraid Logan might beat him up too. He hands you the bag of snacks and grabs a few cigars too.

"You really like sugar don't you?" He jokes as he sees the amount of sugary items in the bag.

"I've never had it before." You admit as you dig through the bag and find something small.

Chocolate.

You dreamed of tasting it for the first time. You rip open the wrapper and bite into it. Wolfing it down in seconds. Logan chuckles, seeing the brightness in your eyes as you taste it for the first time.

"Pretty good huh sweetheart." He reaches over and takes your chin in his hand.

You drop whatever's in your hand, a sudden feeling of...you don't what to call it. Your stomach flutters as he wipes some chocolate off the side of your lips. Your heart starts to beat faster when you see him smile, his eyes turning soft. Palms sweaty and for some reason you don't think you can even look at him right now.

He lets go of you and turns back to the road without a second thought, like he didn't just cause this kind of reaction in you. You hug the bag of sweets and stare out at the road. Trying to calm your beating heart.

Night falls and Logan is still driving, he could drive for a while if he had to but he sees you asleep off out of the corner of his eye. He pulls of the highway and into the parking lot of a motel. He leaves you asleep in the passenger seat reluctantly, checking every couple seconds as he books a room.

When he comes back you're still sound asleep. You look so peaceful, a smile on your face and he wonders what you're dreaming about.

Candy wrappers sit on the floor the car but he just leaves them be. He did have to cut you off after about three kit kats, not wanting you to give yourself a stomach ache.

Seeing someone try flavored chips and processed candy for the first time was amusing. Seeing your face light up with each bite. You were just so, optimistic. He doesn't really know how. He expected you to be angry, jaded, afraid and meek from being locked away for so long. But instead you're full of wonder and curiosity.

You almost gave him a heart attack when you saw a cow for the first time. You slammed your hands on the window and you screamed in excitement. Pictures didn't do them justice, they were just too cute. Things that other people take for granted every day, you saw as new and wonderful.

He opens the car door and scoops you up in arms. Trying not to wake you as he makes his way into the room. Placing you on one of the beds.

"Hm?" You mumble as you sit up, the jostling having woken you.

"Sorry, tried not to wake you. We're stopping for the night go back to sleep." Logan whispers, laying a blanket over you.

"Okay..." Logan takes a sharp breath when he sees your wrist. The one that man from earlier had grabbed on to. You paid no mind to it as you roll over on your side, snuggling the warm blanket.

"Hey, we need to get this checked out." He gently grabs your wrist but you shoo him away.

"M'fine, it doesn't hurt." You say but he doesn't budge.

"Still, it looks like a nasty bruise is forming." You bat away his hand and cover your wrist with your other hand. Logan's jaw drops as your hair starts to glow. He scrambles back as the it shines brightly and then slowly fades away. When you move your hand your wrist is completely back to normal. No bruising to be seen.

"What the?" He looks at you in shock.

"My powers, I don't really know why but the hair glow seems to be apart of it." You rest your head back into the pillows.

"Why would your parents ever want you to hide this?" He asks in disbelief, your powers weren't ones of destruction but of healing.

A sad looks appears on your face and he doesn't ask any more questions. He sighs and rests his hand on your shoulder.

"Get some rest, we'll keep going in the morning." Your eyes close and sleep comes quicker than it has in a long time, Logan's presence lulling you into a feeling of safety.

The morning light shines right in your eyes as you wake to the sound of snoring. You groan as you roll over onto your back. As the world comes into focus you expect to find yourself staring at the cold wood ceiling you've woken up to every day of your life. But you don't.

You shoot straight up in bed seeing the motel décor and Logan asleep on his bed. He's sprawled out on his stomach, shirtless. His hair is still somehow in the same shape as it always sits. The gray streak in his hair matches with the slight graying of his beard. You feel that fluttering sensation in your stomach as you look at him. You want to look away but you can't. His face has that grumpy look on it, even in his sleep. You giggle as you see some drool on his pillow. You lay back down on your pillow, turning to face Logan. Is it creepy to watch someone sleep? Probably, but you wouldn't mind if Logan watched you sleep.

The only man you had ever known before was your father. When he left your mother grew bitter and angry. Neither of them liked your mutant powers but your mother really hated them. You never really understood why. You could help so many people but she refused.

She would tell you that people lead to nothing but trouble. That everyone was cruel and selfish. That love of any kind wasn't real. But some nights you'd sneak into her study and take on of the many books on the shelves.

Stories of romance , adventure, a knight in shining armor. Despite what your mother said to you, those books kept your fantasies of love alive. You just haven't experienced for yourself let. Could that be the silly feeling in your stomach?

I mean, Logan did come in and rescue you. He wasn't wearing armor or riding a horse, instead he showed up in a blue car and a leather jacket. He didn't slay a dragon but he did threaten that one guy at the gas station. You hear him stir, his eyes opening as he groans and shoves a pillow over his eyes so the sun stops hitting him.

You quickly turn on your other side, pretending to be asleep. Would Logan even want to be with someone like you? He's on a mission to bring you back to his home. This is just a mission for him.

Right?

The week deadline Logan gave Charles has gone out the window. It's been far longer as the two of you drive into a new state. Truth be told Logan has been enjoying being away from the mansion. There's no pressure to be anyone but who he is out here.

You don't know anything about his past, or who he was before he came back. You're bright eyed and curious. You had become more and more comfortable around him. You didn't care if he could shoot claws through his knuckles, you trusted him completely.

Now every time you saw something new you begged him to stop. He pretended to be annoyed, making some comment about how he doesn't have the money for all this damn gas. But he can't say no to you. Despite being locked away for so long you seem to have perfected your puppy dog eyes in a matter of days.

In some weird way, watching you discover the world has made him find some joy in life that he's been missing. Logan has always been a glass half empty person if you will and you were so full that some of it was spilling into Logan's glass. He learned that you weren't completely clueless but there were a lot of things that you had never experienced for yourself. Being told stories could only do so much.

You're leaning against the window of the car humming a song on the radio. You really love the radio. In the cupholder sits a water bottle that had been cut in half and filled with dirt and flowers. You had asked him to pull over while passing this field of flowers. He leaned against the car as you took your time admiring them all.

Laying down in the grass and staring at the blue sky. You had called him over and he stood above you, a smile on his face as you held out your hand.

"I don't frolic in flowers sweetheart." Still he let you lay and watch the wind blow the clouds, pointing out the ones that looked a little funny. By the time you got back in his car you had dirt on your clothes and the biggest smile on your face.

You handed him a little handful of daisies. You could barely look at him as you gave them to him, telling him they were a thank you. Those cute little flowers are now living in a cupholder but he likes being reminded of that day.

"Woah! Logan what's that?!" You sit up and point out the window. To your right was a massive wheel and tents and lots of cars.

"Must be a fair or something." He says.

"What's that?"

"It's like a big party I guess. There's greasy food and games and rides." He points towards the big wheel.

"Can we go?" You beg, this is the fourth time today you've asked him to stop and at this rate you won't get back to the mansion by next month. But Logan pulls off the freeway anyways.

The parking lot is uneven ground and you stumble as you try and step in the right spots. Logan just laughs, holding out his arm for you. Shyly you wrap your hands around his big biceps. The bright lights and smells overwhelm you as you step through the gates.

People all around you are laughing and enjoying themselves. You see kids running past trying to get to the next ride, people eating delicious smelling food, bells and whistles literally ringing in your ears from the different game booths.

"Too much?" Logan asks, pulling you to the side.

"No, it's just. I've never seen so many happy people all in one place." You admit. It was an contagious feeling, you wanted to explore everything. and be as happy as the people around you.

Logan takes you through the fair, not letting you go for a moment. He lets you play those rigged fair games for that teddy bear he could easily buy at some second hand store. But you want it so he pays the money. He does end up taking the last shot for you, using all his strength to knock down those damn bottles. Which he does but he also rips a whole in the tent and the tent behind it.

Oops. But you have that teddy bear now.

"I'm going to get us some food, you stay right here got it? No wandering." You nod as you sit on the wooden bench.

You're holding onto the bear waiting for him to come back when you hear someone crying. Through the noise of the fair you can pin point the quiet sobs. You know Logan told you to stay put but you can't ignore the cries. You get up and look around for the source, ducking behind one of the tents to see a little girl on the ground. She has tears streaming down her face clutching her knee.

"What's wrong?" You ask softly as you approach her. She looks scared and you try not to make things worse.

"I fell and hurt my knee and now I can't find my parents." She sniffs, wiping her eyes.

"Can I see your knee, I can help I promise." She looks unsure and so you take the teddy bear Logan won for you and hand it to her.

"This is Mr. Bear, he's a friend." She reaches out and takes him, petting his fluffy head and letting you get closer.

She hugs him tight as you gently rest your hands over her knee. Closing your eyes you hear her gasp as your hair starts to glow. When you open your eyes again her knee is healed. She stares at you in awe.

"You're magic!" She squeals as she stands up, her energy coming back in full force.

"I guess," She jumps into your arms, hugging you tightly. Suddenly she perks up, the frantic voice of an adult calling her name.

"That's my mommy, I should go." She hands you back Mr. Bear but you tell her to keep it.

She runs off to her mom and through the gaps of the tents you see her run into her arms. Her mom overjoyed at finding her again. Your heart sinks just a little, your own mother clawing her way back into your mind. Does she miss you? Did she even notice you were gone? You hear a tent rip and you turn around to see Logan pushing through the fabric. A panicked look on his face.

"Fuck! There you are." He grabs your arm and pulls you back out into the fair.

"I told you to stay put!" He sighs, running his hands through his hair.

"I'm sorry...This little girl, she was hurt and I wanted to help." You wrap your arms around your body, afraid that Logan would be upset at you forever. He looks around and sees a familiar looking bear in a little girls hand. She was talking animatedly to her mother. He can pick up a few words. Magic, healing.

"That was dangerous to do sweetheart, you don't know what kind of people are out here." The worry in his chest isn't going anywhere as he sits down on the bench.

The fear that overtook him when he saw you were gone, fuck he hasn't felt that in a long time. His mind going to the worst places as he frantically searched for you.

"I know, I just couldn't leave her there." You say.

The truth is you had forgotten what the world was like to people like you. Your mother fed you lies for years about how horrible people were to those like you. Mutants. But for some reason when you're with Logan you feel safe. You feel like nothing can hurt you with him around. He's completely flipped your life upside down and you've loved every second. So for a moment you didn't even think of the danger of using your powers out in public. Not when you had Logan.

To your shock Logan pulls you into a hug. His arms wrapping around you tightly. You're here, you're okay. He tells himself. He can't fight it anymore, this feeling inside of him. Somethin in him has changed and it's all your fault.

He lets go far too soon your liking. Not saying a word as he hands you some food. You eat in silence, your knee bouncing up and down as you keep glancing at Logan.

"You don't like it?" He asks seeing how you've barely touched it.

"No no I do, I just...I guess I'm not that hungry." You push the tray of food back to Logan and he just sighs.

"Come on, I want to show you something." He stands up and holds out his hand.

Silently you let him lead you through the crowds until you've gone past the games and the food. Your jaw drops as you see the big wheel come into view. All of your worries are forgotten as you run towards it, Logan following close behind.

"Get in sweetheart, I'll be right there." You see him whisper something to the ride operator and hand him something before getting in next to you. You yelp as it starts to move. Slamming your back against the metal of the seat.

"It's okay, I got you." Logan lifts his arm and puts it around you, letting you stick to his side as the cart goes higher and higher.

You wrap your arms around his waist, burying your face in his chest as you feel yourself getting higher up in the sky. A loud pop makes you screech and slide closer to Logan. He chuckles and gently tilts your head up to look at him.

"Check it out sweetheart, got the best view in the house." You slowly move your face to see big bright colors in the air. You let go of Logan and grab onto the metal bar. Leaning over it as you watch the bright colors shoot through the sky.

"Fireworks." You say breathlessly.

Every year the small city near by would launch these into the sky. Your mother always forced you to bed before night fall but you had your ways and would sneak all the way to the attic. Watching through the tiny window. You could only ever catch a glimpse but it was the highlight of your year, now here they are right in front of you.

"They're beautiful."

Red, Orange, Blue shimmers of light just light up the whole sky. The sky rumbles from the loud booms and the soft fizzles. You rest your head in your hands, utterly mesmerized by the scene in front of you.

Logan has seen a lot of fireworks in his day but these just might be his favorite. They're nothing special. Maybe a little bigger than he's scene before. But these are the ones to bring a smile to your face. You haven't stopped smiling since the show started. He wanted you as close as you could get and what better place than the top of the Ferris wheel.

There's colors lighting up the sky but his eyes are on you. He just can't help himself. Seeing you so happy, so at peace. It's all he wants. His own heart beats a little faster when you look back at him. Nothing but pure joy in that pretty smile.

"Gorgeous." He whispers. You look down at your lap, fighting the fluttering in your stomach.

"Thank you, for everything Logan. For showing me the world, for...for just being you." You don't think you could ever repay what Logan has done for you.

Everything feels so different now but it's a good different. The kind of different that makes you want to dig deeper to see just what has changed.

"I owe you more than you know sweetheart," Logan's rough hand covers yours. He gently takes lifts it off the metal bar and interlaces his fingers with yours, squeezing it gently.

"You asked when we first met why they sent me to come get you." His other hand reaches to cup your face. There's nothing but love and adoration in his eyes as he tilts your head up.

"The truth is I was lost." He doesn't want to spill everything but he needs to know what this whole trip, what you mean to him.

"The past couple of months it feels like I've been drowning, like I couldn't breathe. Until I met you. You look at the world with an optimism I haven't scene in so long. It's infectious. You're infectious."

"Is that a good thing?" You whisper, afraid to even move in fear of ruining this moment.

"Depends, I'm an old man sweetheart. If you don't mind that, if you don't mind me." He knows that he may not be the kind of person you've dreamed of. He's not exactly out of a storybook now is he?

"Logan...All I've known is the inside of that house. I didn't know what was out here," You glance back at the fireworks, at the people below you watching and laughing.

"But you showed me just what I've been missing and I could never thank you enough. I don't know why you felt so lost, but I'm glad it led you to me." Everything just feels right, your heart beating in time with his as he leans in.

Capturing your lips in a soft kiss. Now you don't know if the fireworks are in your head or if they're still going. You can't focus on anything but the feeling of his lips on yours. Both his hands now cupping your face as he deepens the kiss. Chasing after the fresh air that he's longed to breathe.

You reach up and tug on his jacket. Needing him closer to you. This, this is more than you could ever imagine. The stories don't do it justice. Words on paper could never have prepared you for this. For the feeling of his hands on your skin, the movement of his lips, the soft noises, the scent of cigars and honey, the desperation behind every single thing he does.

It couldn't have prepared you for the overwhelming flood of emotions swirling through your heart. It's brand new and you never wanted to it to end. It feels like an eternity passes by the time Logan finally pulls back, his lips still so close to yours. His chest rises and falls slowly. Maybe it's just the fair lights but you swear you see the red creeping up his face.

"What are you looking at?" You ask shyly. A giggle bubbling in your chest as he presses a kiss to your cheek.

"Just wondering how I got so lucky." He says sincerely. Seriously how? Maybe this was the worlds way of thanking him, for forgiving him for the sins of his past.

"I think I'm the lucky one." You kiss his wrist, resting your hand on his arm.

The ferris wheel lurches back into motion taking you both off guard. Logan grabs onto you quickly, pulling you into his chest as you slowly move back down to the ground.

It's like everyone else fades to the background as Logan guides you through the crowd. You're very aware of his hand in yours. You don't ever want to let go. But the fair has come to an end and it's time to leave. Though you don't think you'll ever forget today.

"Do we have to go back to New York already?" You ask as you rest your head against the car window.

"There's still so much I want to see." So much you want to see with Logan.

Logan taps on the steering wheel, he knows he'll have to return to the mansion eventually but he looks over and sees those pleading eyes.

"I don't think they're missing me too much, maybe a little longer." Your eyes light up and he just shakes his head, a smile on his face. Man is he fucked.

I'll be home soon Charles, if you can hear me.

As Logan pulls out of the parking lot he thinks back to what he was told before leaving. Take your time. Well he never specified just how much time. In fact, a small cabin up in Canada doesn't sound too bad right about now. But he'll take you there another day. For now, you have the whole world to explore. He rests his hand on your thigh and pulls out onto the freeway.

"So sweetheart, where do you want to go next?"

#logan howlett #logan howlett x reader #dofp logan #wolverine x reader #logan howlett fluff

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lamentationsofalonelypotato · 8 months ago

Text

Chapter 14: Don't Be A Bundt Cake

Pairing: Soldier Boy x f!reader, Reader POV, Soldier Boy POV

Summary: When you decided to work with Butcher and his merry band of supe hunters to take down Homelander, you never expected to be saddled with a sullen, grumpy, jerk like Soldier Boy when the job was done. The more you're around him the more you hate him, but you can't help but wonder, is he really as big a jerk as you think? Reader is a supe with plant powers. This takes place in an AU about a month after the end of The Boys Season 3, in which Butcher has let Soldier Boy continue to work with him on his team. (I'm real bad at summaries, please forgive me!)

Tropes: Enemies to Lovers (Not in this chapter), Slow Burn, Age Difference (Reader is in her 20s), Soft Ben/ Soldier Boy, Protective Ben/Soldier Boy, Miscommunication Trope

Word Count: 13.1K

Warnings: I'm going to label this 18+ because Soldier Boy (he's a warning and everyone knows it), Swearing, Mentions of Sex, Sexual Innuendo, Talks of Death, DENIAL, Idiots in Love, Pining by the Reader (and SB, but he won't admit it) Depressing Thoughts, Mentions of sexual assault/rape (not detailed at all, really just in passing) Talks about weed, Sexist comments, Ben makes derogatory comments, Threatening Ben/Soldier Boy might be a little bit OOC.

Note: This is told from Reader's perspective. Any references to the reader is made using you or your. There is minimal use of y/n. I tried my best to proofread, but nobody's perfect. If you don’t like, don’t read, but if you do like, you’re my favorite!

Internal monologue is in italics and is in first person.

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A/N: I am so sorry this one took me a bit longer. The writers block was fighting me the whole way, but we are very closely nearing the end of this series and the moment the reader and Ben stop being so stinkin' stubborn.

Reader POV

You lean your forehead against the cool window, watching the world flash by in a flurry of color. The wooded forests had vanished hours ago and all that was left were the yellowed sprawling fields of corn and grain and family farms that were laid sporadically along the interstate. Each one a little world that caught the flecks of golden sunlight as the sun began to peak above the horizon.

The bus rolled smooth and steady over the weathered pavement towards it's destination and was filled with an odd assortment of people young and old. There was man with a brightly colored parrot that had been singing "It's A Small World After All" since you left NYC, a woman with a little boy playing with an iPad and who refused to turn down the volume no matter how many times his mother asked him to, a group of teenagers a few seats up that continued to pass around a flask, and due to how far back you were sitting on the bus an uncomfortable smell emanated from the bathroom each time the door was opened.

But you didn't notice any of it.

The only thing on your mind were the events that happened almost twenty hours ago. They continued to circle your mind, playing over and over again like a perverted cassette tape making you sink further into the worn cloth covered seat at the back of the bus. The images were haunting, some new and some old, but all the more still horrible to re-live.

The song "Nights In White Satin" floating into the backseat of your family's car, the flash of unnatural light you knew was never lightning, the caskets at your parent's funeral covered in flowers that were much to pretty to lay on something so morbid, Elijah's body succumbing to the poppies that ripped him apart, the proud sneer on your brother's face when he admitted to killing your parents, Darren's broken and bloodied body strewn in pieces over the street with the creature standing over him with a dripping red maw, the ruined building that housed "Please Don't Die" reduced to nothing more than rubble, and the look on Ben's face when you turned your back on him and fled the scene.

For some reason that particular image seemed to cling on to you and refused to fade. You'd never seen him look that way, almost… helpless and a little fearful. In all the time you'd known him, Ben had never looked at you that way. Sure you'd seen him proud, angry, cocky, lustful, mischievous, but never fearful. And you were sure that it wasn't an emotion that he was used to feeling, but that begged the question… why?

Why was he looking at me like that? Why wouldn't he let me go? And what was he afraid of?

The creature curled in your lap snorts something in it's sleep, turning it’s head further into the cradle of your elbow to shut out the brilliant early morning sunlight. It was now the size of a toaster and had warranted several odd looks whenever you got off to change buses, but you didn't care.

You weren't sure about anything anymore. Everything your brother confessed to you made you feel like you were living a lie and the revelation of exactly what your powers could do- take life from plants to heal yourself, create whatever the hell it was on your lap, and speak to plants… it scared you.

You thought for so long that you knew everything about your powers, that you were in control, but now you weren't sure.

You felt different, as if something had unlocked deep down that you couldn't shut up again.

You'd felt different after you killed Elijah, but this was more alive, weaving and twisting in the pit of your stomach. You felt more connected to the earth, to the world outside the bus even though you were divided by glass and metal. You could feel the energy that thrummed through the body of the creature on your lap, bending to your will, the life force of the plants it was formed from molding with you, becoming a part of you.

You felt so different than the person you had been before Darren entered the shop, so uncertain, and there was only one place you wanted to be when you felt like this… home. You couldn't wait to run up the worn front steps of your grandmother's house and into her arms. She always knew what to say in times like this.

And you desperately needed the comfort of her embrace.

The phone in your pocket buzzes again and you flip the screen to see the ridiculous selfie Annie and you had taken on Halloween last year. The one that you'd both spent dressed up as the two brothers from your favorite paranormal tv show. It wasn't the first time she'd called. Annie had called and texted you more times than you could count over the past twenty hours but you didn't answer her. You didn’t want to.

It was the first time that you didn't want to talk to her, but talking to her meant that you'd have to re-live all of it again and you were clawing at the last shred of sanity you had left to keep it together.

The overwhelming waves of emotion kept pummeling you, dragging you deeper beneath the white surf. Each one brought the memories of what happened surging over you and were followed by everything that Darren said to you. Years of taking care of Darren and doing whatever he wished were tearing at your soul, years of giving up little things in your life to make him happy, and years of taking care of a man who you thought cared about you, but hated you enough to kill your parents and try to kill you too.

It made your skin crawl. Each time your brother told you that he loved you was an even bigger lie and now that you knew the truth and saw him for what he was, it felt like you were drowning. The darkness that ebbed just on the edge was begging you to leap into the abyss, but you were resisting the best you could.

The tears had stopped falling miles ago, but you couldn't stop the memories or the emotion that formed a cold ball in the pit of your stomach.

A sigh works it's way up and you pull your legs on the seat underneath you, jostling the creature on your lap that raises it's head for a moment to blink it's black eyes at you sleepily.

It was surprisingly docile right now, especially considering that twenty hours ago it had ripped your brother to shreds. In fact it seemed to understand how upset you were and had spent the better part of the last twenty hours rubbing it's head against your arm as if trying to bring you some comfort. It was settled on your lap, the weight of it a comfort, almost like a weighted plushy that gave you something to focus on.

"It's alright buddy." You whisper, scratching him under his chin. "We're almost home."

The phone in your jacket pocket buzzes again, but when you pull it out to turn it off, you catch a glimpse of the screen, and you hesitate. Because this time it's not Annie who's calling, it’s Ben.

The picture that flashes on the screen under the contact name "Gramps" is the picture of Mr. Fredrickson from Up. It always made you smile whenever he called you and you saw the picture because Ben did often remind you of him. He was certainly just as grumpy as Mr. Fredrickson and just as out of touch, but you thought it was cute.

Your thumb hovers over the answer button and you think about talking to him.

But what would I say?

You weren't sure what to say to him, or why you wanted to speak to him so badly, why you wanted him to be sitting here on the bus with you as you went home, and why you wanted him to hold you against his chest while you allowed yourself to break, but you did. You wanted to feel his awkward shoulder pat and his awkward version of hand holding and you wanted to hear him try to tell you to "buck up" or whatever he thought that a comforting word should be.

He's really not the best at that.

You smile to yourself at the memory of how he tried to comfort you back at the hospital, but the longer you sit there and look down at the picture on the screen the worse you feel.

Maybe that scared you more than your newfound powers, how much you were realizing that you needed him, how much you depended on him when things got too much for you to bear. The memory of him appearing as soon as you needed him back at the shop, another of him grabbing Darren and throwing him into the street as soon as Darren insulted you comes in a flash, and finally followed by the memory of Ben carrying you out of Elijah's office while you curled into his chest. You couldn't remember too much from that moment, in fact you'd thought that Ben had kissed you on top of your head, but you ascribed that to the haze of pain you'd been in from your broken arm.

What you did remember was how wonderfully warm he was after you'd been trapped in that damn freezer and how nice it felt to be in his arms. Another memory of Ben sleeping on the couch at the hospital bubbles up and you feel something in your chest begin to crack open. And you try your best to tell yourself the same thing that you always do when you feel like Ben might care more about you that he was letting on.

Ben doesn't want that. He's made it perfectly clear. He doesn't want a relationship. He's only wants one night, that's why he goes out with all those women-

You hesitate, thumb still hovering over the answer button as you do, the memory of the week you'd spent at the apartment with him flickering in the back of your mind. The week where he refused to leave you alone in the apartment, where he refused to do any jobs for Butcher, where he took care of you the best way he could, when he sat with you on the couch and made you laugh with his ridiculous movies, and the week where he hadn't had one date.

Your finger itched to answer the phone, but you couldn't, because you didn't want to feel this way about Ben, not when he'd told you countless times that you kept romanticizing him, not when he told you that he didn't want a relationship, and not when you could feel yourself beginning to fall for someone you thought was the wrong man.

For just a moment you tried to pretend that it was different, that he was different, but you didn't want to. It only made it hurt more.

The phone stops ringing, but the pit in your stomach still gapes open at you and for the first time in twenty hours you feel tears begin to fall. You didn't know why you were crying about this, why the thought of not picking up Ben's phone call seemed to hurt more than everything that had happened, but something made it hurt.

The bus driver announces over the overhead that you're reaching your final destination as he takes the exit for your hometown. The familiar buildings that line the streets are sheathed in a honeyed glow from the sun, the long shadow of the bus darkening them momentarily as it rumbles down the small streets to the bus station.

When it rumbles to a stop at the bus station you wait for everyone else to get off, trying to summon the strength to stand, and swipe the back of your hand across your face to rid yourself of the remaining tears.

The bus station was about a thirty minute walk from your grandmother's house, and you still hadn't called her. You didn't know what to say, didn't know how to tell her that Darren was dead and that he was the reason why your parents were dead.

The creature crawls up your body to drape it's warm body over the back of your neck as you stand. It wasn't bothering to hide, besides the people in your hometown already thought that you were odd because you were a supe and you'd always welcomed it. You give him a scratch on top of his head and his warm tongue flicks on the bottom of your earlobe as if thanking you before it curls further into the side of your neck, seeking warmth.

The first few steps on solid ground are shaky, but you find the strength while taking in a deep cleansing breath of the outside world, letting the gentle warmth of the sun and the tickle of the autumn breeze pull at your coat. You hadn't stopped at your apartment before coming here, instead you had stumbled your way to the bus station covered in dust, flecked in blood, and demanded the first ticket back to Illinois. It was lucky that the next bus was leaving immediately, because you didn’t want to spend another second in NYC, not when all you wanted was to be home.

Plus you were worried that someone had recorded what exactly happened outside the plant shop and you didn't want to get arrested.

It was self defense anyway. Maybe Jake would represent me in court.

The thought of Jake makes you twinge. You hadn't checked to see if he was alright before you ran from the scene. Not to mention you'd destroyed the shop he'd put all his life savings into after he stopped being a lawyer.

Oh fuck, what if he sues me? He can't exactly sue Darren…

You hear someone call your name and you open your eyes.

Your grandmother is standing in front of the same baby blue pickup truck that she'd had longer than you've been alive, wearing a long multicolored skirt and a pressed white blouse tucked elegantly into it. Her silver hair is loose and long, curling over her shoulders in gentle waves. She looks the same way she looked one week ago when she left, and you've never seen anything so beautiful in your life.

You're running before you can stop yourself, crumbling into her warm embrace, with more tears streaking down your face, but she doesn't mind.

"Shh. It's alright honey." She whispers, rubbing her hand over your back, her embrace steady and surprisingly strong. "Let's go home."

Her home is the same as it's always been. A two story Victorian house painted in a happy yellow shade, with a white wrap around porch and two white rocking chairs sitting empty on the front porch. You'd spent more nights than you could count rocking silently beside her with a crochet project in your lap listening to the rain fall and soak the world outside, while the plants sang praises with every gentle bend beneath the heavy droplets.

You could barely remember the home you spent in your early years with your parents, not when you'd spent most of your childhood spending the night here and after your parents died living here permanently. There was still a large oak tree were a wooden swing swung in the slight breeze on the left side of the yard, a gardenia bush that stretched as high as the second story on the right side of the house and brushed it's soft leaves against the sunshine colored outer walls, a garden filled with both flowering plants and herbs that perked up on both sides of the front yard as you walked up the path, and a cobblestone path that Annie and you had spent hours of your shared childhood covering in chalk art.

Neither of you were good, but when the rain would fall and smudge the clean lines, you'd jump in the puddles that pooled along the walkway singing the lyrics to ABBA's "Cassandra" not quite understanding what it meant.

Standing here outside your house made you miss Annie and feel worse about not calling or texting her back, but you didn't feel like talking about what happened and you were sure that Butcher filled her in. The only thing that you wanted was to collapse in your bedroom upstairs and curl under the comforters.

Despite everything the house was a welcome sight, but at the same time it was different. You could feel the plants calling out to you, asking for you, bending towards you just to touch your shoes as you walked by. You'd never felt so connected with them before, not even when you were in your apartment or working at the shop. It was overwhelming.

And although a part of you was frightened by it, another part of you rejoiced in it. You didn't feel alone, didn't feel weak, and you knew that you never would ever again.

The creature nuzzled into the side of your neck with a sigh, soaking up the sun's healing rays as you walked up the front steps with your grandmother following behind you silently. She hadn't spoken since she picked you up at the bus station and you hadn't supplied anything in the ten minute car ride back to her house.

You didn't know where to start and you were still trying to process everything yourself.

The inside of her house was just as cozy and warm as it was the day you moved out. There were photos of your parents and you covering the walls (Darren's had been placed in the closet long ago), half-finished knitting projects sorted in different baskets on both the dining room table and the living room coffee table, spools of yarn were strewn over the couch sorted by color, and the fresh smell of gardenia wafted through the open windows on the breeze.

It was home. This was what you'd been missing the moment everything began to crash over you, but as you stood there in the familiar living room it felt like something was missing. Something tugged at the back of your mind, but you couldn't put your finger on it.

There was something or rather someone that should be here, but you didn't know what or who. And your mind supplied Annie, but you weren't sure that's who you meant.

"Let's have some tea." Your grandmother says from behind you and you feel her soft hands come down on your shoulders to steer you through the familiar creative chaos and into the large kitchen at the back of the house.

The kitchen isn't spared from the madness, it rarely was. There are boxes upon boxes of cookies in different stages of being packaged all over the counter, dirty bowls and a measuring cup stacked in the sink, and a large opened bag of chocolate chips spilling over the flour covered kitchen island.

It wasn't unusual to find the kitchen or the house in a state of chaos, your grandmother always said that a house should look lived in and that the mess was part of the fun of any major project as long as you were responsible enough to clean it up.

"Bake sale?" You ask as you sit down in the breakfast nook, uttering the first words that you'd said to another human being in twenty hours.

The next breath that you inhale was supposed to be cleansing, but you can still feel a weight pressing down on your chest, the same one that settled in the moment everything happened with Darren.

You contemplate again how you're going to tell her that Darren is dead and was the reason why your parents died.

Damn it Darren.

"Mhmm." She hums, filling the well used red kettle. "Annie's mother practically cornered me in the supermarket yesterday and begged me to make cookies. I love Annie, but her mother needs someone to pull that stick out of her ass. It's been up there for so long that I'm sure it's rotten."

The creature crawls down from your shoulders and down your arm to sniff at one of the chocolate chip cookies nearest you. It hadn't eaten since…

Darren.

You wince slightly at the thought and hope that you hadn't created something that needed and craved human flesh. The last thing you wanted to unleash on the world was Audry two especially in the wake of Homelander.

Truthfully you were waiting for the guilt at killing your brother to come, but it never had and you wondered if it ever would.

Probably not. He deserved that, he killed our parents, he tried to kill me, he tried to kill Ben.

The thought of Ben again makes a lump form in the back of your throat. You didn't know what was happening to you only that you felt guilty for leaving him like that, for yelling at him to let you go, and just vanishing on him when he probably thought that you were going back to the apartment.

He doesn't know where I am. Maybe that's why he tried to call, because he got back to the apartment and couldn't find me there and he was worried. You press your lips together. Yeah. Worried. Right.

"Honey?" Your grandmother says in a soothing voice

You look up from the box of chocolate chip cookies that you didn't remember picking up. Even the creature is looking at you with an expression that you can only explain as worry.

"Yeah?" Your voice shakes slightly.

She's leaning back against the counter, arms crossed over her chest, head tilted slightly to the side, her beautiful grayed hair pulled up in an elegant bun, but in her eyes you can see genuine concern. "Fuck." She sighs after a minute.

You blink in surprise. It was the first time that you'd ever heard her say that word in your entire life.

"I shouldn't have left." She breathes. "I told Ben to look out for you. I told him, that little bastard was bound to show up again and what did he do? He left you at that plant shop alone with no protection!"

You'd only seen her really angry a handful of times in your lifetime. Like you, your grandmother often had a gentle disposition and didn't get angry unless the situation called for it.

I mean, Darren admitted to killing our parents and then got fucking ripped apart. But how does she know about any of that? I haven't told her…

"How did you know that he left me there? Did Ben call you?" You ask putting down the box of cookies.

An odd expression crosses her face, as if she's contemplating something. "No." She hesitates again. "I saw it."

"No." Your grandmother hesitates. "I saw it."

"You saw it?" You repeat, confused.

What's going on?

"Too late of course, but I'm a little rusty. I was able to warn Ben that Darren was coming back. That's how he got there so quickly or rather-" She shrugs sheepishly. "He got there in time to make sure that Darren didn't get you to forgive him. Which you shouldn't have at all, but I know he's always had a talent for manipulating you."

"What?"

Is she saying what I think she's saying?

Instead of explaining further your grandmother walks out of the kitchen, leaving the kettle behind on the stove and you in a state of utter confusion.

Is she saying that she can see the future? Because that would mean that she's a supe and there's only one supe in history that I know of that can do that. A supe that no one has seen in over forty years.

You can hear her open the door to the closet under the stairs and the sound of her sifting through all the junk that the two of you had shoved in there over the years instead of finding the right place to put it.

When she comes back into the kitchen, she's holding a giant cardboard file box that you'd never paid attention to each time you opened the closet to find something. Your eyes shift from the box to her still not comprehending exactly what she was saying.

"I probably should have told you this a while ago, but…" She trails off and nods her head at the box before turning back to the kettle on the stove that has begun to scream. "I kept putting it off."

The box is old, worn at the edges, and theres a musty black fabric beneath a collection of yellowed photographs. You pull out the one on top to examine it.

Ben is standing there in his full Soldier Boy regalia outside of Vought tower and the woman standing next to him is Soothsayer. The outfit she wore was familiar, a black-skin tight suit with a blind fold tied over her eyes.

Soothsayer was a supe who could see the future and who was apart of Payback, a supe that had vanished a year before the mission in Nicaragua and no one knew where she went. There were rumors that she'd died and that she'd been a Russian spy, but you'd never believed them. You'd heard Butcher talk about how he tried to find her when he was trying to figure out what happened to Soldier Boy, but he never had. Said that the trail went cold.

But now you knew where she went, because she was standing directly in front of you.

She's Soothsayer? Holy fuck that's why Ben kept accusing her of cheating in the poker game because he knew that she could see the future.

"You were Soothsayer?" You gasp. "But why didn't you say anything? Why didn't you tell me?"

She continues to measure the tea leaves. "I didn't tell anyone."

"Grandpa didn't know? But he was alive when you were a supe?"

Your grandfather had never spoken about a history with supes that you remember.

"No." She turns to look at you, a hurt expression crossing over her face for a minute. "Well, I know that I said I was going to have tea, but if we're going to talk about this I'm going to need something a little bit stronger."

Your grandmother opens a cabinet under the stove an pulls out an enormous bottle of scotch. Truth be told you'd never seen her drink more than just a glass of wine, to see her like this was about as shocking as seeing a polar bear sunning itself on a Florida beach.

"Do you still want the blueberry tea or do you need something a little stronger?" She looks back over her shoulder at you as she pulls down a glass for herself.

"I think I need something stronger." You answer honestly.

Learning about everything Darren had done was one thing, but finding out that your grandmother used to be a famous supe and that she never told you about it was another thing. It was like looking at another person. You'd always loved your grandmother's gentle way, her care for her community and her family soft, but now you weren't sure you really knew who she was.

She sits down across from you and hands you a glass of the amber colored liquid. There's a heavy silence that hangs between the two of you as she tries to find a way to start. The photo of her and Ben is laying on top of what you realize is her uniform inside the box and she smiles down at the photo, just a little twitch at the corner of her lips.

"I met Ben when I was twenty three years old." She begins taking a sip from the glass. "Legend 'discovered' me. I had the injection of Compound V maybe two years before that, not when I was born, but I hadn't gotten popular. Other powers were much more flashy and by then there were so many heroes coming out of the woodwork that someone with the ability to see the future didn't seem as marketable."

There's something reflected in her blue eyes, the same eyes your father had, that you can't place. "I had just moved to New York, I had no money, and the way I was getting it was by pretending to be a fortune teller and betting on some sports events on the side. It wasn't hard to prove that I could see the future, the past was more difficult, but Legend somehow stumbled into my shop and figured out that I was a supe. And he didn't think I was too bad looking so he helped me get big."

"You pretended to be a fortune teller?"

She snorts into her glass. "Mhmm. People really will believe anything if they're desperate enough and back then there was so much turmoil going on with Russia that people were scared and wanted to feel comforted. My job provided some of that."

"But why did you walk away from it if you were such a big hero." You ask. "Everyone knew your name, you were-"

Your grandmother raises an eyebrow at you and you fall silent so she can continue. "When I got onto Payback that's when everything exploded for me, the films, the commercials, the ridiculous ads." She sighs. "That's also when I met Ben."

You take a sip from the glass in front of you, sputtering slightly. It was stronger than you were expecting. "And you two were-"

Please don't say dating, please don't say dating, please don't say…

"Friends. Just friends." Diana sits back against the back of the breakfast nook, sinking into the navy blue pillows. "But he is almost as charming now as he was then."

You cringe at the thought of Ben coming on to a younger version of your grandmother.

She taps her glass with her index finger deep in thought. "But I think that I was the only person that Ben actually talked to, the only person that he was comfortable being around."

"What do you mean?" You ask confused. "Didn't he talk to Countess and to Legend?"

Her expression hardens at the mention of Countess's name. "He didn't talk to her the way he talked to me. Ben is difficult, he always has been and I think that most of the people he meet him write him off as this asshole with a chauvinistic look on the world, but he's not. At least, not all the time. There are so many people that he's met that are never willing to take a chance on him. To trust that there is really something beneath all of that bravado."

It was what you had been thinking for the past week, that there was more to Ben than he was willing to let people see, but you were slowly realizing that Ben was letting you see those parts. In the quiet moments at your shared apartment when he sat with you while you read or made you laugh or walked you to and from work you saw another side of Ben that you never saw when he was around anyone else. The guilt rises again when you think of how you ran from him, how you turned your back and left him standing there to clean up your mess.

I shouldn’t have done that, but it was all just so overwhelming and I didn't want to talk to anyone.

"I think that Ben is the most loyal friend I ever had. No one ever seems to believe me when I say that. That we were just friends, but nothing happened between us."

"You didn't date? Or sleep together?" You ask cautiously. It was difficult to imagine Ben being friends with a woman and not having a sexual relationship with her.

Well. We're friends, but that's different.

The last thing you wanted to think about was Ben and your grandmother having sex.

I would need so much therapy after that. You sigh. Yeah, because after all the shit I've been through and found out about my life in the last twenty hours, the knowledge that Ben fucked my grandmother is what's going to push me over the edge.

"No." She shakes her head with a small smile. "About a week after I met Ben, I was running late to a movie shoot and I stepped off the crosswalk without looking. There was a car coming and I didn't see it. Ironic isn't it?" She laughs at herself. "I can see the future and I didn't see a car coming, but your grandfather did and he grabbed the back of my jacket and yanked me onto the sidewalk, saved my life. And the second my eyes locked with his I saw our future. I saw our wedding, our first house, I saw our son take his first steps and I saw how much I would love him and how much he would love me." She clears her throat for a minute, her fingers tighten on the glass, and her gaze drops to the wedding ring on her left hand. “The future is never set in stone, it’s fluid. It morphs and shapes with your decisions, but in the future I saw, I was so happy. And I didn’t want to lose that.”

Your grandfather had passed a few years ago, but you knew it weighed on her everyday. She had spent the week after he died in her room not saying anything to anyone. And sometimes she'd look out the window into the backyard with an odd expression, but you knew that meant she was thinking of him.

Growing up you'd seen how in love the two of them were, more so than your parents. Seen the flowers your grandfather always brought home just because he was thinking of her, watched him do little things around the house without being asked, saw how they never walked away angry from one another, and seen the soppy expression he'd get when he watched your grandmother move around the kitchen baking with a grace that you'd never possessed.

You reach across the table to touch her hand and she takes it gratefully.

"I didn't want to tell him that I was a supe, and at the beginning I thought I could balance it all, but then Ben started dating Countess." She takes another sip from her glass. "She hated me."

"What? Why?" You ask. The creature crawls across the table to sniff at the glass in front of you, before it snorts and falls into your lap, curling into a ball.

"Countess was a bitch." Your grandmother says mirthlessly, her expression hardening. "She wanted to possess Ben completely. Only loved how famous he was, how popular it made her, and he threw himself at her feet, in his own way, not understanding that love didn’t look that way. He’s never had a good example of it in his life. And she never understood that Ben and I were just friends. By then I had been dating your grandfather for a few months and things were getting serious. It was about a year before everything that happened in Nicaragua."

She presses her lips together as if remembering what happened to Ben there. "She was jealous, possessive, and she came to me one night. Ben was out of town for a film so she knew we wouldn’t be interrupted. She threatened to tell your grandfather who I really was and threatened to kill him.” Her jaw sets. “My powers were never really as offensive as hers were. And she said that Ben wouldn’t ever protect me over her because he loved her and would do anything to make her happy. So I left and I never looked back.”

And here I thought I couldn't hate Countess any more than I did for what she did to Ben.

“You didn’t talk to him ever again?” You wonder out loud.

She left without telling him goodbye?

“There was the occasional phone call. Sometimes Ben would ask me to see who was going to win a ball game or something so he could make a few bucks. He stopped by to say hi a few times because he was in the neighborhood. One time he brought your father a baseball glove that was way too big for a one year old.” She snorts, the memory flashing in her eyes. “I always thought Ben would be a good dad some day. But I think seeing your father was when Ben realized how much he wanted to have kids. And I think seeing the way your grandfather treated me made him start to feel conflicted about Countess. But he respected that I walked away, he saw that I was happy.”

“But what about Nicaragua?"

A dark look crosses her face followed by something that looks suspiciously like guilt. “I saw what they were going to do to him.”

“What? But why didn't you tell him what they were planning? Why didn't you-"

"I tried." She snaps, shoulders tense, but then they drop. "I called Ben, but Stan answered. By then your father was turning two, your grandfather had opened up his practice, and Stan threatened me, he knew where we were and knew everything about us. So I kept my mouth shut and I’ll regret it for the rest of my life.”

You could feel your heart breaking for her.

Ben was her best friend and she had to sit by and watch them do that to him. She saw what they were going to do and they were going to kill her for it, kill my family for it.

The anger that surges in your chest makes the creature in your lap stir and grow a few inches, but you tamp it down before it gets bigger than a small dog.

“Does Ben know?” You ask her to distract yourself.

You didn't want Ben to hate your grandmother for this, didn't want him to hate her for something that wasn't her fault.

She nods. “Yes. I told him everything.”

“When?”

“The moment I saw him in your hospital room. I couldn’t keep it in any longer. I wasn't expecting him to be there, but it all poured out of me. I was so surprised to see him there. I hadn't seen a future where he came back."

“Was he mad?”

I mean… he didn't seem mad when I woke up, not to mention he was upset when she left to come back to Illinois.

“Not at me.” She shakes her head. “He knew how much I wanted a normal life and how much I loved your grandfather. He doesn’t blame me for any of it.”

“Good. I can’t believe you didn’t tell me.”

The glass in front of you is still more than half-full but you don't want to risk another sip of what you're sure is gasoline packaged to look like Scotch. Your grandmother reaches to pour herself another glass.

“I didn’t want to until you were ready.”

“And when would that be?”

Your grandmother shrugs. “Maybe on my deathbed.”

You weren't angry for her not telling you, more surprised, but now that you knew everything about her it was hard to see her the same way you had.

You snort. “And no one knew?”

“Your dad figured it out.”

“How? When?”

“The moment you made that strawberry plant grow from your high chair.” She shakes her head with a smile. “It skipped a generation. Don’t know why, but you got it all somehow.”

“I was never injected?”

“No. That was a lie your father created. He knew that your grandfather didn't know and he knew that I didn't want your grandfather to know."

“Darren thought I was.”

“I know.”

At the mention of your brother's name, you watch her expression harden and she takes another swig from the glass in front of her, not flinching as the liquid goes down her throat.

“Did you see everything that happened?” You ask in a small voice.

You still weren't 100% sure how it was her powers worked, but you figured that she was able to see some of what Darren did and what he said.

“Yes.”

“You heard everything Darren said?"

“Yes.”

You chew the inside of your cheek for a minute hoping that she didn't take it as hard as you did. “Did you know that he killed them?”

“No.” She breathes, rolling the glass between her hands for a moment. “The night they died, I got a vision a few minutes before the car ran off the road. I was the one who called the police and who told them where to look, but I never saw that it was Darren or that it was anyone causing the accident. All I saw was the three of you in the car. I should have known.” Her voice breaks.

“It’s not your fault.” You squeeze her hand.

“And it’s not yours either.” She squeezes your hand back.

The memories are beginning to float up from the recesses of your mind and your teeth clench together as you try to keep them at bay.

“I know.” You breathe. The memory of the ruined shop flashes through your head. “I didn’t know that I could do something like that.” You gently touch your healed right arm and glance at the creature that is nibbling on the edge of the cardboard box with its sharp splinter-like teeth. “I feel so different and I don’t know how to go back to the way I was.”

“I don’t think you ever will.”

"Really?"

The thought was unwelcome. You were hoping that all of this was going to blow over, but you knew it wouldn't. Your powers had changed. There was an energy that thrummed in your veins now, stretching out of the house to the plants that grew in the garden. You could feel them all if you concentrated.

She frowns. “When you told me that you were working for Butcher I was worried about you getting involved in the supe world. I didn’t want that life for you, didn’t want you to suffer the way I did-“

“Was it really that bad?"

“Not all the time, just at the end. But I think that’s why I loved your grandfather so much. Because he was different than all the supes. He was down to earth, not just normal but-“ She shrugs. “I think Compound V does something to our minds, makes them more susceptible and when you’re surrounded by people using their powers and thinking that they’re gods it’s easy to lose who you are. I was glad I left when I did."

“Great." You huff, thinking about how your powers had grown exponentially since you killed your brother. It was scaring you to think that you would reach a point where you acted like Homelander, where you saw yourself as a god and killed anyone who stood in your way.

As tired as the stereotype of you only being able to make the flowers grow, you liked doing that. You liked healing plants, tending to them, and helping them grow. For you it had never been about using your powers the way that you had to kill Elijah and your brother and had always been about spreading a little more joy and love like your grandmother did with her kindness in her community.

Your mind flashes back to the first night that Ben stayed with you in your apartment and he'd asked you why you worked for Butcher and told you that he thought you "didn't fit."

Before you hadn't. You knew that. You weren't intimidating to look at or fueled by revenge or had a bone to pick with supes. You'd joined because you thought it was the right thing to do and because you wanted to be closer with Annie. She had been so involved in the supe world and you'd felt like you were losing your best friend. When in reality being at "Please Don't Die" was the only thing that felt natural for you.

You could feel yourself changing and you weren't sure that you wanted to and you weren't sure if you were changing for the better. Deep down you still felt like you, despite everything Darren had revealed, but your powers were greater than you'd thought they could be.

“No.” She squeezes your hand pulling you out of your head. “I don’t see you losing yourself in this.”

“You’ve seen-“ Your eyes widen.

“The future yeah.” Her lips twitch up at the ends in a smile. “It is what I do.”

“That’s so weird.”

You hadn't meant to say it, but you really didn't want to know too much about your future.

Well, not all that much. Maybe just a little.

“You of all people have no right to judge what’s weird. Not with Godzilla sitting in your lap.”

"Godzilla" yawns, flashing a mouthful of his pointy teeth, before settling back down on your thighs.

You smile for the first time in twenty hours, but then it drops. “I don’t like losing control. I thought I knew who I was but now I don’t-“ The emotions were bubbling up again, chest tightening, and lungs beginning to gasp for air. “I don’t know who I am anymore or what I am or what I can do and-“

“There’s nothing wrong with not being in control.”

“But what if I hurt someone? What if I kill-“ You body shakes as you think about all the important people in your life, Annie, Hughie, Butcher, Kimiko, MM, Frenchie- and then your mind stutters on Ben.

“Your powers are growing and there’s nothing to be afraid of or ashamed of. If you’re afraid of them it won’t get easier for you. You have to embrace the fear to see the lights that line the path through it.”

"I killed Darren, I killed Elijah-"

"Not because you lost control. You did it because you were protecting yourself and protecting your friends."

"But-"

"Who is it that you're scared of hurting? Annie?" Her expression turns sympathetic. "Annie is a supe and understands what it's like to lose control. None of us are in control all the time and it's ridiculous to believe that you won't lose control at least once."

Your throat clenches tightly, because when she asked the question you didn't see Annie's face, you saw Ben's. You knew that it was probably ridiculous to worry about hurting a guy with a nuclear reactor stuffed in his chest or a guy who'd been through every torture known to man, but you were. And you weren't entirely sure if you meant hurting him with just your powers.

Tears crest and fall down your cheeks as you sit there, throat thickening. "I don't want to hurt Ben."

"He's a little more indestructible than us sweetie." She cracks a smile, but you can't smile back and you don't answer because you're unsure how to.

She sits back against the breakfast nook and sighs, examining your face and slowly realizes what you mean. "Ben is complicated. He always has been. I like to think that most of it, is his father's fault. Has he told you anything about him?"

You shake your head.

"He was a dick. Made Ben think that he was a disappointment his whole life. I don't think that Ben has had someone love him unconditionally since his mother died. And loving Countess only made it worse for him. Her love was jealous, possessive, and I don't think that he's really come to terms with what real love should look like." She lets out a breath, tapping her index finger against the glass. "I never saw him as more than a friend, but I do love him. It's not a crime to love him."

"I don't love him." You say it immediately.

"Why not?"

"What?" You sputter. "I don't know what you're-"

"Tell me why you don't love him." Your grandma says methodically, as if she's trying to talk you through it.

"Because I-" The pressure was back in the back of your throat and you couldn't quite meet her eye. "Because-" You scramble for the answer, trying your darndest to keep your heart from clenching in your chest. "I want what you and grandpa had, what Annie and Hughie have, and what my parents had. A strong relationship with someone who sees all my flaws, the little parts, and the darkness and still choses to fall in love with me anyway. I don't want just one night I want every night. I want something real and Ben has said countless times that he-"

"So you've talked about it with Ben?" She raises an eyebrow.

"Only because he kept trying to sleep with me and I told him that I didn't want to have sex with him." You reply exasperated.

"You don't?"

"Gran!"

"What? He's attractive."

"It doesn't matter. None of it does. Because Ben has said that he doesn't have relationships, that he doesn't care about feelings, or emotions." Saying the words that Ben had told you countless times made something inside begin to shrivel up and die. "And I do. And I don't want to manipulate him into being something he's not or force him into a relationship that's doomed from the beginning. Ben is Ben. He's not changing or-"

"He has." She interrupts.

"What?"

"The Ben I saw in your hospital room is not the one I knew." She says it so matter of fact that makes it hard to breathe. "And neither was the one that I saw in your apartment when I stayed with you. I mean he is in essence Ben, but-"

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"He is changing. Not completely, but he's acting differently than when he was with Countess. I mean, I saw all the things he did for her. The way he was around her."

"Why does that matter?"

"Because he loved her."

The words make your heart seize in your chest. "Ben doesn't love me. He's my roommate and my friend-" It was the same thing that you kept telling yourself on repeat to beat back the other feelings that you hadn't quite identified yet. "And he's told me that he doesn't want a relationship and that I should try to meet other people."

That last part was a lie, but you honestly didn't know where she was going with this conversation or why it was getting so hard to breathe.

"Have you thought that maybe Ben doesn't want to love you because he's scared?"

"He doesn't love me and Ben isn't afraid of anything."

"He is. It might not look the same way on him as it does on everyone else, but if you pay close enough attention you can catch it." She hesitates. "And I think if you pay attention to you, you'll see what it is that you're afraid of too."

What does she mean? What the hell am I afraid of? Ben isn't afraid of anything, he's practically shouted that from the mountaintops like Julie Andrews.

"I already told you what I'm afraid of."

"I'm not talking about you hurting someone honey. There's something else that you refuse to admit to yourself because you're scared." She smiles sadly at you. "You should though, because when you embrace it, what comes after is really beautiful." There's a far off look in her eyes and you realize that she'd seen something further ahead that she wasn't letting on.

"And it's all I want for you. To be happy." Your grandmother stands from the other side of the booth "I think you need some rest. You drove all night long and I doubt you got any sleep. And I have to package all of these before Annie's mother calls down the four horsemen of the Apocalypse on me."

"Wait-"

"Please sweetie." She lays her hand down on your arm. "I think you'll feel a little better about all of this when you've had some rest." Her fingers raise to push back some of the hair that's fallen forward into your eyes. "Hmm?"

You didn't want to rest, you wanted to talk about this, but you knew better than to argue with her. Not to mention she was right, you hadn't slept.

"And when you wake up I'll make your favorite for dinner, alright?" She smiles, but there's something behind it that you can't place.

"Okay."

And this time you don't argue with her. You go up the worn staircase that you have your entire life and collapse onto your bed, wondering exactly what it was she saw your future hold, and what it is that you won't admit to yourself.

Soldier Boy POV

There was no light in the apartment save from the burning red tip of Ben's blunt and the bluish glow emanating from the tv that caught the dips and sharp edges of his face. But it was nothing more than background noise.

His hand absentmindedly stroked along Bean's back, his eyes focused on the ceiling above the couch. He hadn't moved in hours. It had been over twenty four hours since everything that happened at the plant shop, since you'd summoned a creature from the depths of the store, since Darren had thrown Ben through the plate glass windows of the bakery, and since Ben had last seen you.

He didn't understand why you hadn't let him take you back to the apartment and why it was that you had to leave. Ben hadn't liked the feeling that stabbed him in the chest when you turned your back on him and ran away. He'd felt the urge to comfort you the way he'd watched Hughie do for Annie in the car a week ago, but you hadn't let him.

Instead all he'd done is stood there and watched you run, still covered in dust, rubble, and blood. Worse was you hadn't let him check you for injuries and Ben hated the thought that you were hurt somewhere and he didn't know where you were.

You were so much more fragile than he was. He was realizing that more every day, was acutely aware of it after everything that happened with Elijah. Honestly, sitting there in the hospital with you laying there asleep with nothing that he could do, but wait for you to wake up had been agony. Not to mention that looking at the bruises around your throat, over your eye, and the bright green cast only made him feel worse. He'd never felt so helpless in his entire life and he hated it. Because Ben wasn't some helpless damsel in distress, he was a man and a man shouldn't wait on anyone or feel out of control, or at least, that's what he told himself.

Ben hears someone walk down the hallway outside the apartment and he perks up to listen, hoping that it's you finally coming home. Ben's mind stutters on the word "home." He'd lived many places in his life, apartments that felt more like way-stations, and the drafty cold mansion back in Philadelphia where he grew up, but neither felt like home. And although he hated how small your apartment was, it was the first place that Ben liked living in. He was starting to understand the word home.

But the feet keep moving past the apartment and Ben sinks into the couch cushions. Even Bean seems to be disappointed. "It's alright buddy." Ben mutters. "She'll come back."

But he wasn't sure.

Ben also wasn't used to feeling this way. It was close to the way that he felt when he went to Boston and was sitting in that damn hotel room waiting for something to happen and he still didn't understand what it meant. He didn't understand why he couldn't stand it that you weren't back yet. It made him feel like a woman waiting for her husband to get home from work when he told her that he was "running late." He'd tried to distract himself by looking at some possible prospects on Tinder, but just like the week after you'd come home from the hospital and just like the date he had in Boston, no one held any appeal.

His mind was awake and roaming around, pacing back and forth. The blunt was supposed to help, but it hadn't.

His phone chirps and Ben picks it up to look at the screen, but it's not you, it's Jake.

Jake: I know that I'm not your favorite person, but thank you for what you did.

Ben huffs and turns his phone face down on the couch once more. "What a fucking pussy."

When you left Ben had realized that Jake was still inside the building and as much as he wanted race after you, he understood that you'd be even more upset if you'd killed Jake. So Ben had tromped back through the building and found him trapped beneath some rubble. Jake was okay, just unconscious, but Ben had carried him out and put him on the sidewalk before he high tailed it out of there. The last thing that he wanted was to be caught with a shredded body outside a ruined building.

I didn't do it for him. I did it for her. Ben thinks to himself, looking down at the text message.

As much as he hated the thought of saving your future boyfriend, he didn't want to see what it did to you if you found out that you killed Jake, so he'd done it to avoid watching you cry again.

Ben didn't understand why he hated watching you cry.

Women cry. They're damn emotional all the time. He tries to reason with himself taking a puff from the blunt pinched between his thumb and forefinger. And she fucking cries way too much.

The image of you crying outside of the shop in the wake of everything that happened pricks something under his ribcage. Fuck.

Ben didn't feel remorse for what happened, well, the only thing he regretted was not getting there sooner and getting to fuck Darren up himself. When Diana had called him to tell him that Darren was coming, Ben had practically ripped the apartment door off in his haste to get back to you. He hadn’t wanted to leave you at the plant shop, but Butcher had told Ben, that he had a possible location for Darren, but it came up empty and Ben had been at Butcher's apartment chewing him out for sending him on a fucking wild goose chase.

It only made Ben more angry to allow Darren to speak to you, but he was trying to let you handle it even though he wanted to handle him. But it had brought him an unholy amount of joy to throw Darren in front of that minivan and to watch that creature tear him apart while the final whitish blue pulses of electricity jumped and crackled down the street making the streetlights shower sparks everywhere.

But Ben was more upset that Darren had been able to land a few hits on you before you killed him.

Ben remembered the giant lizard that crawled out of what was left of "Please Don't Die" and felt his lips quirk up into a smile. As much as he hated the entire situation, Ben couldn't help but feel a little surge of pride at what you'd done to your brother. He'd never seen you look so powerful standing there in the street, your eyes glowing a brilliant green, arms outstretched, and the ground trembling around you as the world begged to be unleashed.

Of course he'd been just as surprised as you were at the fact that you'd healed your broken arm. He wasn't sure if you'd noticed it yet, but you looked different too. There weren't as many lines on your face and your hair was more springy, the few silver hairs that Ben had noticed in passing were no longer there.

He wasn't sure what that meant, but there was something that felt suspiciously like hope tingling in his stomach, hope that you weren't as fragile anymore and hope that it meant you wouldn't die.

When Diana had told Ben that her husband had died, he saw the pain in her eyes when she said it, saw her relieving the memory, and for some reason as soon as she said that he was dead, the first thing Ben thought about was you. Ben hadn't considered his inability to age as much in the past, hadn't cared about outliving anyone before. Seeing Countess as an older woman had made him more aware of it. Looking at the woman who he once thought he loved, had showed him what that was like. Not that he had a problem with daring older women, Ben always thought that women really did get better with age, but it was what came next that Ben wasn't fond of.

And for some reason thinking that one day he'd wake up and see the marks of age on your face or one day he'd wake up and he wouldn't be able to annoy you or hear you yell at him made his chest tight.

Ben takes another hit of his blunt. The longer he sat there the more then unnatural feeling stirred in the pit of his stomach, thrumming through his veins, the feeling that he was trying to avoid. He thought that the joint would calm him down, but he found himself jumping at every creak and footstep in the apartment building, perking up each time and hoping that it was you coming home.

He didn't know where you were. You hadn't answered any of his texts or calls and Ben was ashamed at how many times that he had tried to call you.

Get a fucking grip. He'd thought to himself when he typed out another text message to send you, stopping himself from sending it.

But he'd been so desperate to hear from you that he'd actually gone to talk to Annie who seemed upset that she couldn't get ahold of you either. When Hughie and Annie had seen how upset Ben had been, Hughie had laid his hand on Ben's arm and told him not to worry. Ben had yelled at him that he "wasn't fucking worried and to mind his own business" and had shaken off Hughie's comforting hand before stomping out of the shared apartment.

No one else seemed to be as concerned about finding you. Butcher, MM, and Frenchie were all deeply involved in trying to figure out the cover-up for what happened outside the plant shop. By some miracle no one had caught a picture of your face, but there was little they could do about Darren's body that had been strewn across the street. Annie was having to deal with the repercussions at work, trying to handle what the news was calling a "super villain threat."

Personally, Ben thought that since they froze Homelander, the Seven looked weak and Ben believed that the superhero team that represented America shouldn't look weak. Of course before Ben had also thought that they looked like a bunch of pussies and again felt himself sink deeper into the couch when he thought about what his supposed son had become.

He shakes off the feelings he has about it and his thoughts turn back inevitably to you.

Ben wasn't used to thinking about someone as much as he thought of you, but each time he settled back into the apartment and you weren't there he was hyperaware of how quiet it was.

Maybe I should call Diana. She might know where she is.

As soon as Ben thinks that, his phone begins to ring, but Ben doesn't bother to look at who it is before he answers it.

"Hello?" Ben huffs out a breath of smoke that hangs in the air in front of his face, catching in the bluish light coming from the television.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" The voice on the other side of the line yells at him.

"Di?"

"Yes it's me. Who did you think it was? Santa Clause?" Your grandmother snarks.

"Why are you calling me and why the fuck are you so mad? What did I do?" Ben answers slightly annoyed.

As much as you got under his skin, your grandmother had been the same way. He actually thought that it was amusing that even before he figured out that she was your grandmother that he had often compared you to her in his mind. You had the same mannerisms, the same defiant and stubborn attitude that drove Ben up the wall, and you were just as beautiful as she was.

Ben was okay with admitting that he was attracted to you. To him that felt normal, it was the other feelings that he was conflicted about, the ones that he'd never felt before stirring in his chest that made him feel "too emotional" and "woman-like."

Truthfully, Ben was sure that if your grandmother had given him a shot that maybe he would have felt that way about her too. She was the only person that Ben actually trusted in the 80's, the only person that was brave enough to call him out on all his shit. You did that now. But he liked her husband also, so Ben was content with letting her go. He liked how happy that Henry, your grandfather, had made her. He knew that she wasn't happy as a supe and seeing her so happy and in love made Ben feel something that was close to happiness.

And it was seeing the way the two of them were together made Ben wonder if what he had with Countess was the same thing. Because he did have feelings about her that were different, but each time he went to visit Diana and saw your father playing on her lap he felt that there was something missing in his life.

It was the same way that he thought something was missing when you weren't in the apartment, but Ben hadn't realized that yet.

"Because I don't understand what the hell you're doing!" Diana replies and Ben honestly doesn't know why she's angry with him.

"About what?"

"My granddaughter."

Ben sits up the blunt in his fingertips forgotten. "Is she there with you?"

"Yes." Her voice softens for a moment.

Ben relaxes and leans back onto the couch, sighing in relief. "Good. That's good." Relief swelled in his chest when he thought about you staying with her, safe.

That's what she meant when she said that she wanted to go home. Home is with her grandmother. Ben stopped the next thought before he could go there.

The thought that home wasn't with him.

Ben was trying not to think about that or think about you hating him. He didn't think you did, well, didn't think you did anymore. At first it really was touch and go, but now he was almost eighty percent sure after you'd told him more than once that you weren't afraid of him and didn’t hate him that you sometimes wanted him around.

"No, not good."

"What do you mean? Is she okay?" Ben's grip on the phone tightens so hard that he's sure that he hears the screen cracking.

"No."

"What happened?" Ben's voice is a growl, the feelings of relief evaporating as soon as they had begun to bloom in his chest. He mentally calculated how long it would take him to get to you.

"Her entire life fucking fell apart and where are you? Not here!"

Oh. Ben relaxed a little bit.

"I don't need to be there." He says on an exhale of smoke.

"Yes you do!" Diana presses.

"No, I don't. She a big girl she doesn't need me there, she's-" Ben takes a puff from the joint.

“If you were any denser you’d be a Bundt cake Benjamin!” She says exasperated.

"What the fuck are you talking about doll? I am not-"

“Let me guess." She interrupts and Ben can imagine her tapping her foot. He hated when she did that. "You’re moping around smoking a blunt on the couch probably with a glass of something that you're hoping to numb whatever the hell it is you're feeling."

Ben's eyes shift to the bottle of whiskey on the coffee table that he hadn't touched in a few minutes.

“I’m not fucking moping and stop spying on me!” He snaps back at Diana.

He hated how well she knew him. She was his best friend in the 80's through all the shit, she had seen him at his worst and at his best too many times to count.

“I don’t have to use my powers to know what you’re doing. I know you Ben.”

"Sorry to disappoint you sweetheart.” Ben grits his teeth, temper flaring hot. “But if you know me as well as you fucking say you do then you then you know that this is-“

“You avoiding your feelings by acting aloof and brooding like a fucked up version of Mr. Darcy.” She interrupts.

She certainly hasn't changed.

“I am not avoiding-“

“She needs you here Ben.” Diana stamps her foot, the same way you do when Ben pisses you off, and Ben can hear it.

“She doesn’t need me! She said that she wanted to go home, that she didn’t want to be here with me! I tried to-“ Ben shouts back standing up. It was the exact thing that he'd been thinking for the past twenty four hours, that you didn’t need him and that you didn't want to be any where near him.

That last thought made an uncomfortable sensation prickle in his gut when he thought it, because all it did was remind him of how you acted when the two of you first met, when you didn't want him to live with you and tried your darndest to make him go away.

He didn’t want to and he wasn't sure why that was.

“Try harder.” Diana interrupts him again and frankly it was pissing him off.

Ben clenches his jaw. “I think that you’ve confused me with someone else baby.”

“Don’t you 'baby' me Benjamin! We both know that you’re doing what you always do when things get hard for you.”

“And what’s that?”

“You pretend not to care and shut out everyone who tries to care for you. Not to mention you drown yourself in drugs, booze, and women.”

“She doesn’t care about me!” He spits.

“She does!” Diana snaps back. “And believe it or not she needs you here and she wants you here.”

"But-"

"Ben please." It was the first time that he'd heard Diana sound softer and almost pleading since the conversation started. "Don't do this to her. She's worth more than Countess and all those other women you've fallen into bed with."

"Do you really think I don't know that?" He roars. The answer surprises himself. "Do you think I don't know that she's different?"

Wait what?

"If you know that, then why aren't you here?"

He hesitates.

Everything you said to him the night of the party comes roaring back. You looking beautiful in a dress that made his throat tight, and you telling him that you just wanted to be friends and that you understood that he wasn't the type of guy to have relationships. He didn't understand why it stung a bit when you said that, but it had.

Ben thinks about the week that the two of you spent together after Diana went home, when he tried his best to take care of you, distract you from everything that happened with his movies, and would sit with you and try to make you laugh. He'd never wanted to take care of someone before.

Not to mention he kind of liked the way you laughed. He wouldn’t admit that to anyone, but each time you did, it made him want to laugh too. That had never happened to him before. But he wanted to make you laugh to forget everything that happened with Elijah. His fist clenches when he thinks of exactly what Elijah tried to do to you and it makes him feel so mad that he feels close to spontaneously combusting. Ben might not be the best role model when it came to women, but he couldn’t imagine the type of man who would force himself on someone else.

It had made him angry when he thought that you were suggesting that he would try something when he first moved in, because he wasn't that type of man.

Ben was trying to be better for you. He wasn't admitting that, but he really was trying to be better. He didn't understand why. You'd told him countless times that you didn’t want to be with him, that you wanted to be with someone else like Jake.

Ben frowns when he thinks about the man he'd pulled from the rubble of the shop. And again thinks to himself that you should be with someone different, someone who was a supe and could understand you. Ben had seen how difficult it was for Diana when she was keeping her supe life a secret from your grandfather and he didn't want you to have to do that with someone.

"Because I'm not-" Ben begins to say, but he holds his tongue. It was too honest, too raw, too unlike him to admit this to anyone.

Because I'm not this guy. Because I'm not the one she wants. Because I'm not some knight on a white horse. Because she's everything right with the world and I'm just a fucking asshole who sleeps on her couch.

"Ben." Diana breathes and he can practically hear her pinching the bridge of her nose. "In all the years I've known you, you've never done what you did for her with anyone else. You carried her out of that warehouse, you stayed with her in the hospital even after she woke up, you took care of her when she came home, you protected her from Darren. You can't ignore all those things."

"I'm not ignoring them. She's my friend." The word sours in his mouth as he says it. "And she would have done the same thing for me." He knew it was true.

She's a good person and she wouldn't let me chase her away if any of that shit happened to me and I told her to leave me alone.

"Yes she would. Because she cares about you." Diana sighs.

"She doesn't."

"Why don't you believe me?"

"Because she's told me what she wants!" Ben shouts so loudly he can feel the room shaking. "She wants to be friends-“

"Because she doesn't think that you want a relationship you nitwit!"

"I don't." Ben spits the words before he can stop them, but as he does something tightens at the base of his throat.

"How is it that it's been forty fucking years and you're still able to dance on the grave of my last nerve?"

Ben chuckles. "I missed you too sweetheart."

She sighs into the phone again making it crackle in Ben's ear. "She needs you.” Diana repeats. “And I think you need her too.”

His temper was flaring again, the thoughts that his father pressed into him surging up before he can stop the words. “I don’t need anyone. I’m Sol-“

“If you say that you’re Soldier Boy, I’m going to reach through this phone and slap you silly.” She snaps. “And you do need her, but you’re still just too stubborn to admit it.”

“I-“

“Ben I know that everything that happened with Countess was fucked up, but my granddaughter she-“ Diana pauses before she changes the thought. “You say that you know she’s different, but right now you’re treating her the same way you treat all those other women.”

“I’m not-“

“My granddaughter has decided you’re important to her and once that’s happened it’s hard to make her let go. You saw the way she was with Darren and that guy was a manipulative asshole. Imagine what she thinks of you.”

“I-“

“Stop making excuses!”

“You didn’t even hear what I was going to say!” Ben shouts.

“And I don’t need to! Think what you want Ben but if you’d stop acting so stubborn and so ridiculously blind to what’s right in front of you. I promise that what comes next is worth the risk.”

“Don’t go all fucking mystical on me doll.”

“And don’t go all macho- no feelings asshole on me! So stop being so damn stubborn, get on a plane and get your ass here.” She retorts. “Don’t fuck this up Benjamin because if you do I’ll fuck you up.”

The line goes dead.

Ben sat there for a minute in the silence still holding the phone up to his ear, listening to what your grandmother said to him ring around in his head for a second.

No one ever spoke to him that way. In fact, Ben had never allowed anyone to speak to him the way that she did, well, not until you came along. You reminded him so much of her that it was astounding and he wasn't going to admit that maybe it's why he liked being around you so much.

Ben frowns at what Diana said, thinking about the unusual feelings that were swirling in the pit of his stomach. He felt wrong and the feelings were odd for him. He hadn't felt anything remotely like this ever in his life, not even for Countess.

And although Ben refused to be afraid of anything, the feelings he was having scared him. He didn’t understand and he wasn't sure that he wanted to. He wasn't sure that he wanted to see where this ended up. He felt like he was in too deep.

As much as he wanted to go to you like Diana ordered him to, he wasn't sure that he should. Something was holding him back, digging it's heels in and refusing to budge.

But why do I feel like-

His phone rings and he doesn't look at the caller ID when he picks up, expecting it to be Diana again, yelling at him.

"Di I-"

But it's not Diana.

"Hello Ben. It's nice to hear your voice again." The familiar voice says, sounding calm and collected.

"What the fuck do you want?" Ben snarls.

"I thought it was time the two of us had a chat.”

A/N: At this point Diana is really just trying to give both Ben and the reader the kick in the pants they need. And yes I know another cliffhanger, but you know you love it. 🤭😉 We are quickly reaching the end of this series, but that means the confession scene is coming and I am so excited about it!!

As always thank you so much for reading! Reblogs, likes, and comments are not required, but are always appreciated. I love hearing what y'all think! If you'd like to be added to the taglist for this series let me know. 😊

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oskea93 · 5 months ago

Text

Tyler Owens x OC

Summary: In which Riley Owens, the ex-wife of the infamous Tornado Wrangler, has 36 hours to come to terms if moving to a whole new country with their small daughter is something she truly wants to do.

Warnings: Cursing, angst, suggested smut, fluff. ✶ Chapter One ✶ ✶ Chapter Two ✶

■ A/N: You guys are amazing! I just want to say thank you so much for loving this story and following the tale of Riley and Tyler ❤️ ■ Taglist is available - just drop a comment! Would love to hear your thoughts, questions, or maybe just drop by to say hello! Can't wait to hear from y'all

TL: @ellesmythe @18lkpeters @hookslove1592, @djs8891, @smoothdogsgirl @queenslandlover-93 @imjustamehbleh @love2write2626 @lt-jakeseresin @starcrossedtrek @kmc1989 @lauraseresin

(12:59pm)

“Hey Lilly—” I jogged over to the Subaru as she quickly buckled into the driver’s seat, her movements quick and determined.

“You coming?” Her eyes sparkled with a mix of excitement and urgency, reflecting the thrill of the impending storm and the adventure it promised.

I let out a chuckle, shaking my head no. “Not in a million years.” I could see her smile falter, a flicker of disappointment washing over her face. “I was just seeing where Caroline was—thought maybe Tyler left her with you or Dani?”

As soon as the words left my lips, I watched as the blood literally drained from Lilly’s face. “He didn’t ask you?” Her voice trembled slightly, and my stomach sank.

My shoulders straightened in concern, an uneasy feeling settling in my chest. “Who—ask me what?” My heart began to beat erratically, the rhythmic thumping echoing my growing anxiety.

She stayed silent for a moment, her gaze dropping to the steering wheel as if she were afraid to say the words that might shatter the fragile calm. “Caroline’s riding with Boone and Tyler.”

Panic took over my emotions, a tidal wave crashing over me. “What!” My eyes darted to the open road, Tyler’s red truck becoming nonexistent in the distance. “No, he didn’t fucking ask me!”

“Oh shit,” Lilly whispered, her voice barely audible over the thrum of the Subaru’s engine. “Look, maybe he just forgot to mention it? You know how he gets when there’s a storm coming.”

“Forgot?” I spat, disbelief and hurt lacing my voice. “He knows how I feel about her going near those things! Especially after…” My voice trailed off, unable to articulate the memories that flashed through my mind. Images of that night rushed back—dark clouds, howling winds, the terror that wrapped around us like a vice grip, and the cuts that etched across her small face, a haunting reminder of the dangers we faced.

Lilly’s hand found mine, her touch a wave of calm against the storm raging inside me. “I know, I know. But freaking out won't help. Get in. We'll find them.” I nodded, my head still spinning, rage still coursing through my body like a live wire.

The thought of confronting Tyler, of seeing the smug look on his face, ignited the fire of my anger. But more than that, I was terrified for Caroline. I yanked open the passenger door and slammed it shut, the sound echoing the turmoil within me. "Let's go."

The Subaru roared to life as Lilly peeled out behind Dexter’s motorhome, the wheels kicking up gravel in our wake. I watched as the clouds grew darker, swirling ominously overhead—the very clouds that were no doubt hanging over Tyler’s truck. “We got formation forming just west of the interstate—about four miles away from you guys,” Dexter’s voice crackled through the radio, a beacon of urgency amidst the chaos.

“Roger that, Dexter!” Caroline’s sweet voice echoed back through the radio, causing my heart to beat harder, a mix of relief and dread flooding my senses. Hearing her voice brought a wave of warmth, but it was quickly overshadowed by the reality of the situation. I could imagine her, focused and brave, but I couldn’t shake the worry gnawing at my insides.

“Caroline!” I called out, my voice rising above the roar of the engine and the wind. “Are you okay?” I needed to hear her say she was safe, to know that she was out of harm's way. The radio crackled, and I held my breath, waiting for her response.

“You think her being with me would mean that she’s not okay?” Tyler’s voice echoed back, dripping with sarcasm. “You’re really making me feel like a real winner of a father today, Riles.”

The air in the car grew tense, heavy with unspoken words and unresolved issues. My grip on the dashboard tightened as I processed his response. Tyler’s defensiveness was palpable, and it ignited a flicker of anger deep within me. “This isn’t about you, Tyler. It’s about Caroline’s safety,” I shot back, my voice steady but firm, trying to keep the storm of emotions in check.

“Oh, right. Because you’ve been the perfect mother, haven’t you?” he retorted, his tone sharp, like a blade slicing through the tension. “Last I checked, you were the one who moved hundreds of miles away and took Caroline away from me.”

His words hit hard, and I felt a rush of heat wash over me. I could hear the accusation lingering in his voice, and it stung. Moving and taking Caroline away from Tyler was one of the hardest things I’ve done at that time. I couldn’t stay in Arkansas any longer – there were no job opportunities for me out here. I couldn’t depend on Tyler any longer – fearing that any moment I would get the call that he was killed. I wasn’t gonna put my daughter through that.

“I did what was best for our daughter, Tyler.” My voice was tight, trembling with a mixture of anger and fear. “You fucking know how I feel about storm chasing, and you go behind my back and take her with you without even tell—”

“Telling you!” His voice rose, echoing off the walls like thunder. “Goddammit, Riley, she’s my daughter! If I want to bring her along and let her see what Mother Nature is granting us the pleasure of witnessing today, then by fucking God, I’m gonna do it.”

The line went dead, the crackle of static abruptly replaced by an unsettling silence.

“Tyler—” I called out, my voice rising in urgency. “Tyler!”

The two-way radio bounced sharply against the dashboard before it clattered to the floor with a dull thud. Frustration coursed through me as I stared at the lifeless device, its silence echoing the dread swelling in my chest.

“I know you don’t want to hear this—” Lilly began, her gaze unwavering on the twisting road ahead, her knuckles white against the steering wheel. “But we both know that even though Caroline is in that truck with Tyler and Boone, she’s in the safest hands at this moment.”

I raked my fingers hastily through my hair, a futile attempt to dissipate the mounting anxiety. The landscape blurred past as I focused on the horizon, where dark clouds roiled ominously. In the distance, I caught sight of Dexter’s caravan veering off to the side of the road, him and Danny jumping out, urgency propelling their movements. My heart raced; it meant Tyler and Boone were gaining on the twister.

“He knows how I feel about her getting that close,” I snapped, my voice thick with emotion. “He knows what she and I went through that night.” The memories came rushing back flooded with chaos, fear, and the haunting realization of how quickly everything could spiral out of control.

Lilly glanced at me, her expression a mix of concern and determination. “We can’t change what’s happening right now. We have to trust them. Tyler wouldn’t put her in danger.”

“Trust,” I muttered bitterly, staring out at the darkening sky. “Trust means nothing when you’re staring down a storm.”

Just then, a low rumble echoed in the distance, a warning growl from the sky. It sent a shiver down my spine, reminding me that time was slipping away. I could almost feel the pulse of the storm, the chaotic energy that promised destruction.

Lilly’s Subaru kicked up the Kansas dirt as she pulled up beside Dexter and Danny. I watched as she quickly got out of the car, her computer in hand as she rushed towards the duo.

As I stepped out of the car, the dry Kansas air enveloped me, carrying with it the scent of dirt and ozone. My attention was hijacked by Tyler's booming voice, his words spilling from Dexter's speaker like a sudden burst of energy. I felt a pang of unease as I caught sight of Caroline's bright smile on the screen, her eyes sparkling with a mix of excitement and nervousness.

"Ladies and gentlemen of the internet, we have a special guest with us here on the storm chaser channel," Tyler announced, his tone a perfect blend of showmanship and daredevil charm. "Why don't you say hi to everyone, sugar pie."

Boone's camera whirled around, capturing Caroline's beaming smile as she waved at the camera. My heart skipped a beat as I watched, a mix of emotions swirling inside me.

"Tell 'em who you are, tater," Boone egged her on, his voice filled with a playful enthusiasm that grated on my nerves.

Caroline's gaze flickered towards Boone before she turned back to the camera, a hint of shyness creeping into her expression. "My name is Caroline Sarah Owens," she said, her voice clear and confident.

“Owens –“Boone playfully questioned. “You wouldn’t happen to be related to Tyler Owens the tornado wrangler, would you?”

Caroline gleefully nodded her head, “He’s my daddy!”

"Whoa, small world!" Boone exclaimed; his enthusiasm infectious. "The tornado wrangler's daughter, riding shotgun with us today! Folks, we've got a real treat for you!"

Tyler's voice chimed in, his tone laced with a mix of pride and amusement. "That's right, folks! My little girl's got storm chasing in her blood. And she's not afraid to get up close and personal with the big ones!"

I watched, my anxiety spiking, as Caroline's smile grew even wider, her eyes sparkling with excitement. She was eating up the attention, and I couldn't help but feel a pang of worry. This was all too much, too fast. She was just a kid, and she didn't understand the risks, the dangers that came with storm chasing.

The team glanced over at me, gaging my reaction as the camera moved away from Caroline and back onto Tyler as he explained the mission for today. The models were showing a strong storm with a lot of updrafts – big and foreign words for someone in the fashion industry. I’ve heard Tyler and the team mention them all the time, but never been inclined to learn the true meanings.

“As always—” Tyler grinned into the camera, his excitement infectious. “We have the crew out in the field—Dexter, Dani, and the fabulous Lilly!” A split screen popped up, revealing their faces, each one brimming with enthusiasm. My presence was also caught on camera, a new face among the familiar crew, and it didn’t take long for viewers to take notice.

It took only a moment for someone in the comment section to spot my unfamiliar face, and soon questions flooded the screen. Who was I? Was I a new member of the Tornado Wranglers? Meanwhile, Tyler and Boone kept their focus on the incoming storm, casually brushing aside the burning questions that swirled around like the storm clouds above.

“There’s that beautiful girl!” Tyler exclaimed, his gaze shifting to the passenger side window. “Carolina, honey, check that out!” His finger pointed excitedly in the direction of the swirling twister, and I turned just in time to see our daughter’s head bobbing up, her bright eyes wide with wonder.

“Don’t you think we’re getting a bit close?” Ben interjected, glancing nervously between Caroline and Tyler. “Precious cargo and all?” His concern was palpable, but Tyler merely chuckled.

“Good ol’ Ben,” he smiled into the rearview mirror, his confidence unwavering. “This is the safest truck you’ll ever ride in. You need a good reliable vehicle when you’re riding into the twister, baby.” With that, his foot slammed down hard on the accelerator, and the truck surged forward, causing Ben to lurch back in his seat. Caroline's delighted giggles rang out in the background.

“So for today’s lesson, ladies, gentlemen, and kiddies,” Tyler continued, his voice booming with enthusiasm, “we are gonna see if you can, in fact, set off fireworks into the center of a twister. Got those canisters ready, Boone?” His eyes sparkled with mischief.

The camera switched back to Boone, who was grinning ear to ear, giving the lens a thumbs up. “Ready to rock and roll, Wranglers!” His excitement was contagious, and I felt my own heart race in anticipation.

As Tyler pressed down on the accelerator, the sound of the engine roared, drowning out everything else. Boone let out a whoop of exhilaration, and Caroline's laughter filled the air like music. However, a wave of nausea suddenly hit me, a gut-wrenching sensation that felt like crashing against a brick wall, as the red truck barreled right into the swirling center of the funnel.

“He’s got her, Riley,” Dexter tried to reassure me, but his words felt empty against the mounting chaos outside.

The signal began to glitch as the twister rolled ominously over the truck, the screen flickering as if the storm itself was trying to disrupt our broadcast. The sudden noise of an explosion erupted, followed by a dazzling display of red and blue sparks bursting through the sickeningly dark skies. It was a breathtaking sight, both beautiful and terrifying, a vivid reminder of nature’s unpredictable power.

“Hell yeah—” Dani yelled, her voice ringing out with pure jubilation. “They fucking did it!” Her enthusiasm was infectious, but I couldn’t shake the uneasy feeling clenching in my stomach.

Seconds later, the signal stabilized, and the faces inside the truck beamed with excitement, their adrenaline still coursing through them. The storm that had moments ago loomed ominously above us had practically dissipated, leaving behind a clear blue sky punctuated only by the remnants of swirling clouds. Tyler’s truck rolled back onto the gravel road, dust swirling in our wake.

“You’ve seen it here first, Wranglers—” Tyler declared, his smile wide and infectious. “You can shoot off fireworks in the middle of a raging twister!” His voice was filled with pride, a testament to the crew’s daring spirit and their unwavering pursuit of adventure. He turned to the camera, gesturing animatedly as he went on to thank the crew, his excitement palpable.

Pulling Caroline into the front seat with him, he wrapped his arms around her small frame, an image of fatherly affection. “And thanks to my little backseat co-pilot for joining me today.” His eyes sparkled with joy as he looked down at her. “How’d you like it, sugar pie?”

Caroline smiled brightly, leaning her head against Tyler’s flannel shirt, her small voice ringing out sweetly, “Love it.” That same smile, one that mirrored her father’s—bright and full of life—shone into the camera, capturing the hearts of viewers everywhere.

Tyler turned to the camera again, his tone playful. “You wanna do it again sometime?” Without hesitation, Caroline nodded her head vigorously, her enthusiasm infectious, prompting Boone and Tyler to erupt into laughter. “Well, there you have it, ladies and gentlemen! Be on the lookout for the newest and youngest wrangler coming to screens near you soon.”

But as I watched this heartwarming exchange, a wave of unease washed over me. “Over my dead body,” I muttered under my breath, the words laced with a mix of protectiveness and apprehension. The thought of Caroline—my little girl—getting swept up in this chaotic whirlwind of storm chasing sent a shiver down my spine.

The crew might have been reveling in the thrill of their antics, but I couldn’t shake the nagging worry that accompanied such reckless adventures. Tyler thrived on the adrenaline, and Caroline, with her sparkling eyes and adventurous spirit, seemed ready to follow in his footsteps…

I was immediately on my feet once I caught a glimpse of the truck pulling into the parking lot. My heart raced as I stepped up to the backdoor, not even bothering to wait until he had placed it into park. The anger bubbled inside me, a boiling point I could no longer contain.

“Now wait a minute, Riley,” Tyler edged, quickly hopping out of the driver’s side, his face a mix of concern and confusion.

“Don’t you dare say a single word to me right now, Tyler Owens. Don’t you fucking dare.” My voice was sharp, laced with the fury that had been building since the moment I saw the storm on the horizon. I knew it was wrong for Caroline to see me acting this way towards her father, but the thought of him taking her without asking me—after I specifically told him no—set me ablaze. He had put her in the path of a fucking F2 tornado!

“Mommy, did you see what Daddy did?” Caroline’s voice broke through, innocent and filled with excitement, but it only fueled my anger further. I practically threw her harness straps off her little body, pulling her into mine as my arms wrapped protectively around her.

“She had fun, Riley,” Tyler said, his tone deeper, almost defensive. “It’s in her blood—”

“No, Tyler!” My voice cracked, laced with a mix of fury and desperation. “It’s in your blood—” My finger jabbed into his hard chest; each word punctuated with emotion. “She has no place out in this world—”

Before I could finish, Lilly and Boone swiftly approached, their expressions turning serious as they saw the tension escalating. They reached for Caroline, gently pulling her out of my arms. Tears rolled down her cheeks, caught in the crossfire of Tyler and my argument. The sight of her distress twisted my heart, but I couldn’t back down; I had to make him understand.

“Make you feel good to see her cry?” Tyler shot back, his voice low and fierce.

My jaw slacked, disbelief washing over me. “Excuse me?” I could hardly process his accusation. “This isn’t about me feeling good, Tyler! It’s about her safety!”

“Then why are you yelling at me?” He gestured towards Caroline, who was now in Lilly’s arms, her small body trembling. “She’s scared because you’re acting like a lunatic!”

“Because you’re being reckless!” I shot back, my hands trembling as I ran them through my hair, tugging at the strands in frustration. “You think this is some kind of game? You took her into a storm, Tyler! A storm! What if something went wrong?”

“Nothing went wrong!” He argued, his voice rising, echoing in the parking lot. “She had the time of her life! You should’ve seen her face when the fireworks went off—”

“And what about the next time?” I interrupted, my emotions spilling over. “What if next time there’s no one to pull her out of danger? What if you can’t protect her?”

The tension thickened in the air, and I could see the frustration in Tyler’s eyes morph into something more vulnerable. It was a fleeting moment, but for a second, I saw the doubt in him—the realization that maybe I was right, that there were risks we could never ignore.

“Riley,” he said, his tone softening as he took a step closer, trying to bridge the divide between us. “You know I’d never put her in harm’s way on purpose. I love her, and I love you. I thought we were in this together—”

“Together?” I scoffed, the bitterness creeping into my voice. “We are not together! You don’t get to make unilateral decisions that put her at risk! This isn’t just about you and your thrill-seeking! She’s a child, not a prop in your adventures!” Each word felt like a dagger, aimed directly at Tyler’s heart, and I could see the hurt flash across his face.

He opened his mouth to respond, but the words seemed to catch in his throat. I could feel the weight of the moment pressing down on us, the tension crackling like static electricity in the air. Behind us, the parking lot buzzed with life, but in our little bubble, it felt like the world had narrowed down to just the two of us—two parents at an impasse, fighting over the well-being of our daughter.

“You think I don’t care about her?” he finally shot back, his voice rising in frustration. “I love her! I thought I was giving her a taste of adventure, something exciting to remember! Isn’t that what we want for her? To live life fully?”

“Not like this!” I pressed, my hands shaking as I struggled to keep my composure. “Adventure doesn’t have to come at the cost of her safety! You think it’s fun to chase storms and set off fireworks, but you’re not seeing the bigger picture. What if something had gone wrong? What if she had gotten hurt?”

Tyler ran a hand through his hair, exasperated. “Nothing did go wrong! She was safe, and she loved every second of it! You’re overreacting, Riley. You always do this—”

“Overreacting?” I echoed incredulously, my voice rising. “I’m not overreacting! I’m being a mother! You may see this as just another day in your thrill-seeking life, but I see the risks! I see the potential for disaster!”

Lilly stood to the side, trying to soothe Caroline, whose eyes were wide with confusion and fear. “It’s okay, sweetie,” she murmured softly, wiping away the tears that had streamed down Caroline’s cheeks. “Mommy and Daddy are just having a grown-up conversation.”

I felt my heart break as I watched my little girl caught in the middle of our storm. “I don’t want her to see us like this,” I said, my voice softening for a moment, but the anger quickly surged back. “But how can I stay calm when you’re putting her in danger?”

“Danger?” Tyler scoffed, his expression hardening again. “You call it danger; I call it living. She’s going to grow up thinking the world is a scary place if you keep her wrapped in bubble wrap!”

“Bubble wrap?” I laughed bitterly, my chest tightening. “Protecting her isn’t bubble wrap, Tyler! It’s being a responsible parent! You can’t just throw her into the eye of the storm and call it an adventure!”

“Maybe you need to let go a little!” he shot back, frustration boiling over. “Maybe you need to trust me! I know what I’m doing!”

“Trust you?” I felt a wave of disbelief wash over me. “You think this is about trust? This is about being sensible! About understanding boundaries! You need to realize that you’re not just making decisions for yourself anymore!”

“Then what do you suggest? We just sit at home, watching the world go by while she dreams of the adventures we could be having?” Tyler’s voice was rising, and I could see the veins in his neck pulsing with tension.

“No!” I replied, my voice pleading. “But there’s a balance! There are ways to introduce her to adventure without throwing caution to the wind! You need to stop thinking of her as your sidekick in a dangerous game and start seeing her as our daughter!”

“Are you really insinuating that I think of Caroline as my fucking sidekick?” His eyes darkened with rage. “That little girl is all I fucking have in life, Riley. How would you feel if someone took away your life and moved them hundreds of miles away?”

“I did what was best for her, Tyler.” I was exhausted with having this argument. “There was no opportunities for me in Arkansas – no opportunities for her. I’m not gonna be the happy little housewife that waits patiently by the front door, hoping that you come back in one piece. It was draining being married to the Tornado Wrangler.”

“Was it draining to be married to the Tornado Wrangler when you were spending the money that was coming in?” Tyler's words left his mouth before he had time to think, each syllable laced with a bitterness that echoed the anger boiling beneath the surface.

“Wow—” I gasped, tears welling in my eyes as his question felt like a gut punch. The accusation hung in the air between us, sharp and unforgiving. In that moment, I felt a rush of emotions—hurt, anger, and disbelief all crashing over me like a wave. How could he twist my concerns into something so selfish?

“Is that really how you see it?” I managed to choke out, my voice trembling with the weight of his words. “You think I was just some gold digger, living off your success while I played house?”

“It's not like you ever complained when the checks came rolling in,” he shot back, his frustration bubbling over. “You loved the lifestyle—the trips, the nice things, the freedom. But now that it’s all gone, you want to act like it was so tough!”

I felt the heat of anger rise within me, mixing with the tears that threatened to spill over. “You’re missing the point, Tyler! It wasn’t about the money! It was about the instability, the fear of you chasing storms without thinking about the family you were leaving behind. I was drowning in uncertainty while you were out there chasing your dreams!”

His expression hardened as he crossed his arms, the tension in his body palpable. “So what, I’m supposed to just give it all up? Stop being who I am because it makes you uncomfortable?”

“No!” I exclaimed, my voice rising. “But you need to find a balance! I wanted to support you, to be there for you, but I couldn’t keep pretending that everything was okay when it felt like our lives were hanging by a thread. I was terrified of losing you to the very thing that you loved!”

“Terrified or just selfish?” he countered, the bitterness in his tone cutting deep. “Because it sounds like you’re just mad that I didn’t fit into your picture-perfect life.”

“Picture-perfect?” I echoed, incredulous. “You think I wanted a perfect life? I wanted a partner, someone I could count on. But instead, I was left waiting by the door, wondering if you’d come back in one piece or if the next storm would take you away from us forever.”

The silence that followed was heavy, filled with unspoken words and unresolved feelings.

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