#traphawkahy

[remyfire]

Unfortunately I am still rabid over the AU concept of Trap being forced by family to go to divinity school instead of pursuing medicine and him colliding with Mulcahy there—aka an AU that maybe Five (5) people care about—and conversations like this do not help me

[hearteyespierce]

Has anyone explained to you the philosophy of Hawktober?

It’s an intimate little month where a person’s only obligation is to ship Hawkeye with absolutely everyone!

Participate however you want, fic, art, memes, what have you! There are no rules — participate every day, only some days, with ships not on the list or using the list entirely ‘out of order’ (they aren’t really in any particular order to begin with) — I don’t care! This is very low pressure/low stakes

ID: a square graphic promoting ‘Hawktober.’ On the right side is a drawing of Hawkeye looking exhausted with a speech bubble that says “So how ‘bout it? You wanna be a patriot and love me back?” On the left hand side is a list in two columns of 31 Hawkeye centric ships, which are as follows:

Tommyhawk

Klinghawk

Punnihawk

Margtraphawk

Beejhawk

Olliehawk

Ingahawk

Hawnk

Margietraphawk

Lylehawk

Hawkellye

Ollietraphawk

Sidhawk

Traphawkahy

Henhawk

Margiehawk

Chardonnahawk

Hawkelow

Charhawk

Houlihawk

Paik/Chohawk

Beejtraphawk

Radarhawk

Charbeejhawk

Marinahawk

Hawkahy

Margtraphawnk

Moodyhawk

Traphawk

Margbeejhawk

Lalhawk

Would love for folks to join in! Have fun! 💖

[remyfire]

Did you know that if there are three people on my screen, I am gonna make them kiss?

[remyfire]

Fic ask meme!! A, L, and/or Q <3

Fanfic Ask Meme A: How did you come up with the title to [insert fic]?

Ahh, Rosie, you didn't give me a specific fic title, so I'll go general!! —54% are song lyrics —6% are prompt-based —40% are completely random, just what came to mind when I considered the content of the fic

I go for song lyrics more frequently nowadays but I also do not have as modern or expansive of a music library as much, so I do a lot of repeats of the same songs!! I'd love to start using poetry as well, but I still am having trouble digesting poetry with my focus disorder. Work in progress.

L: What’s the weirdest AU you’ve ever come up with?

I still think traphawkahy seminary incubus AU—with or without the optional addition of B-girl content—is probably the silliest possible title at this point. Notably I am not responsible for all of it—shout out to @hesgomorrah—but I'm very fond of it so I am putting at least a wee bit of claim on it.

Q: Do you have any discarded scenes/storylines/projects?

I have the very very very bad habit of entirely deleting scenes that I edit out rather than saving them in another doc for possible later use, but I still have a few moments from Scratching The Itch kicking around. Multiple ones, so they're unedited under the cut for anyone curious.

When I was brainstorming how to get to the massage/sex scene in chapters 4 and 5, originally I had Hawkeye playing a little bolder and BJ meeting him competitively in the middle and overruling him. It ended up not working for my purposes, and I appreciate getting to go the more tender route with BJ especially. iirc correctly, this snippet was going to take place directly after Freddie's departure, with Hawk teasing BJ about how hard he is and how he's refusing to go take care of it. But you can see the thread that I carried over into the actual shower chapter itself.

"I've done without for this long," BJ drawls, lips quirked in that hint of a smile that teases what California sunshine must look like. "I can last a little more."

"But why bother?" Hawkeye tucks one finger in BJ's belt loop, just barely fitting between the smooth leather and the rough fabric, and gives him a tug. "We don't want a Sunday pot roast, Beej. The longer you let that sit and stew, the more tender it's gonna get, and how's that fun for anyone?"

BJ puts his hand square in the middle of Hawkeye's bare chest and gives the gentlest nudge, and Hawkeye is so taken aback that he lets him, lets BJ walk him backward one step at a time. Those lips turn upward just a hint more as blue eyes sparkle down at him like the sea and the sky have swapped. "Because the first time that you make me come," BJ murmurs, "is going to be when I'm fucking you."

Hawk's eyes widen so far they feel like they might bulge out of his head. It's not the first time he's felt BJ's hand on his skin, but there's intentionality here beyond just pulling him to sit beside Beej on a bench when they're 8 straight hours into surgery, beyond the way BJ's fingers would find the slim gap between Hawkeye's shirt and pants while they stumbled laughing back from Rosie's.

Those beautiful fingers are a weight on him—but a grounding one.

The back of his knees hit the bed and he tips into sheets that still smell like sex and sweat, and suddenly he's desperate to know how BJ's pheromones are going to mix.

"That's what you want, isn't it?" BJ's voice is barely over a murmur. "You want to know what it feels like to be as full as you've made all those pretty girls your whole life." BJ lifts his eyebrows, wrinkles spreading across his forehead. "You want. To be. Fucked."

Finally the words creep in fully through the post-orgasmic haze, slithering around his brain, squeezing, ready to make a meal of him. His blood goes cold and leaves goosebumps along his entire body.

BJ is a prankster. He's as mercurial as the god that word is named for. He takes delight in teasing, needling, but never in a cruel way. Right? Has BJ ever been cruel to him—intentionally, sadistically, curving his wrist to make a bleeding gash in Hawkeye's heart? Suddenly he can't recall, can't be perfectly sure. Those glimmering eyes are waves crashing down to drown him.

"I-I..." Hawk fights to find the light he had in his chest only moments ago.

And these are assorted bits of dialogue that ended up not being used, originally used regarding Freddie and in the shower scene respectively.

"I think the war's aged me fucking fifty years. Jesus. You're gonna laugh, but I'm so tight, I think I almost pulled something just from fucking her."

~~

"You're telling me this because if I ever said a word about you and Peg being open, you'd be able to take me down with you."

"I'd never take you down over anything, Hawk. But if that's what you need to believe, then go ahead."

This is the original ending of the R&R scene in chapter 6, right before the pivot back to camp. I wrote this before doing anything else with chapter 6, and then when I started from the beginning, I realized BJ had a lot more rage and grief regarding how his attempt to be domestic with Hawk (has BJ done this before with men? Has it worked? Is Hawkeye special?), so I couldn't use it, and again, I prefer how it ended up moving, even though it left a lot up in the air for me to play with when I circle back. (notably I had also forgotten I gave them three days of R&R, so I couldn't send them back that easily anyway when they still had a full day left to go hfdkd)

BJ clicks his tongue against his teeth. "You've been touching me this casually since I puked my guts up in front of you and nobody's said a word." When he glances over his shoulder, the flatness is gone. "Yeah. Of course it'd be casual. What else would it be?"

Hawkeye opens his mouth, shuts it again, and forces himself to think before he speaks. "I'm, uh, glad we're on the same page."

BJ chuckles and pats Hawk on the cheek just a little too firmly. "Can we head out before they leave without us?"

"Oh, sure, sure," Hawkeyes drawls. He goes to grab his own bag in turn. "I'm in such a hurry to get back. I wonder if they're serving liver or liver tonight in the mess tent."

"At this point, probably sewage soup."

Hawk laughs. "Perfect meal for denizens of a swamp."