#trigger warning:depressing

[chie7231]

He surfaces after his first attempt, to find a delighted Sirius clapping for him. Sirius swims closer, pulling a shocked Regulus onto his back. Regulus, almost instinctively, wraps his arms gently around his brother’s shoulders. Sirius glides forward in the water before turning his head and winking.

“Remember what I said about holding your breath?”

Regulus nods, an easy smile painted across his face.

Sirius smirks before diving underneath the blue, glasslike water. Regulus tightly holding onto his back. Regulus finds himself absentmindedly noting each and every fish that swims alongside them.

They pop up a moment later, both taking a gargantuan gulp of fresh air. Sirius pulls he and Regulus onto the dock, shaking out his long locks of hair before settling down. Head tilted back easily, staring at a cloudless blue sky.

Regulus’ eyes slowly open as he is dragged into the uneasy depths of the cave waters. Claws digging into his ankles, though he doesn’t feel the sting as strongly as he initially had.

Kreacher seems miles away, his already small form growing smaller and smaller as he plummets into the icy, cold depths of the lake.

He moves his legs back and forth, fruitlessly, to escape the numerous arms binding and pulling him down. The initial intensity with which he kicked grows lethargic, legs kicks have turned into toe twitches.

Though his lungs burn, and his chest feels as if it will explode..Regulus holds his breath.

The last relic of a seemingly forgotten happy memory.

[tinybutwicked]

Maylor with 86 please! I love your writing ❤️

//thank you lovie! Here you go, it got a bit heavy but i hope y'all appreciate :) //

This got a bit on the heavy side, handling depression. So if you're not comfortable with that, please skip this one

Roger was at the end of his rope. He didn't know what to do, he didn't know how to help, and it was driving him towards insanity at an increasing pace.

Brian wasn't well, he hadn't been well in a long time. And every morning they woke up, the guitarist refusing to get out of bed, Roger's willingness to believe that everything would be okay was eaten away. Bit by bit. He wanted to believe, he wanted to help, but he didn't know how because nothing worked.

The drummer knew that depression was a thing that would always be there. He had known it when he had declared his love for Brian for the first time, he had known it when they had moved in together and he had been alright with it. He still was, and his love for Brian was still as unwavering as ever.

But he was tired of not being able to help, of just having to sit by and watch the man he loved waste away in the grimy, unapologetic hands of his depression.

Nothing Roger did was good enough. Because nothing helped.

"Bri? I brought you breakfast" The bedroom was stuffy and dark, the curtains still blocking the sunlight from outside. Because maybe enough sleep would help Brian feel better?

It had become a norm in the past few weeks that Roger's words were left unanswered, so he walked to the bed trying to not mind the heavy silence too much. Because it wasn't Brian's fault.

"I got you some strawberries and the vegan bread you like so much. It's still warm, they had just baked it" Setting the tray down on the bedside table, the drummer sat on the edge of the bed, waiting for Brian to turn and face him.

He didn't, and Roger wanted to scream.

"There's tea and coffee in the kitchen. Do you have a preference today?" The sheets rustled slightly in the rhythm of Brian's breathing, but the guitarist still wasn't looking at him.

Roger wanted to snap, he really did.

But this wasn't Brian's fault.

"Just… you need to eat, Bri. Otherwise the wind will manage to push you over the next time you go outside" The attempted humor didn't really work, because it didn't get an answer from Brian and now Roger couldn't help but think that maybe the guitarist would never go outside again.

Stop that

"Could you.. Look at me, please?" He was craving for some kind of contact. Anything, really, because even if they held each other through most nights, it still felt like Brian was somewhere far away.

And once again, there was no answer to Roger's plea.

"Please, Brian? Answer me, please? Look at me, say something so that I -" The blonde bit his tongue. It wasn't Brian's fault, he shouldn't push.

"Just… Yell, scream, cry - just say something"

"I'm sorry" It was the first time in days that Roger heard Brian's voice, and it broke his heart. Because of course Brian would apologise, ask for forgiveness for something he couldn't help at the moment. Of course that'd be the first thing he says.

"No, it's not your fault. I'm sorry for pushing, I just worry. It's okay" The blonde reached to lay a comforting hand on the guitarist's shoulder, feeling the older man lean against it.

It wasn't all lost yet, because Brian didn't mean to push him away.

"I love you, Brian. Remember that, alright?" The silence was back, but now Roger had a little more hope again that it wouldn't last forever.