#tw:racsim

[deathvalleyqueen]

I disowned a lot of my family today.... 

I stood up for my brother... a young biracial black man to my cousins racists threats for violence. 

I was called a whore... a junkie... I was told that I will end up just like my mother... This was by my cousin that was like my brother... that was someone who spent summers at my house.. I lost aunts... uncles... cousins... but the truth is... the second my mother married a black man we were excluded. It took me over 20 years to see that.

I used to wonder why we stopped going to visit our family back east... it wasn’t cuz of money... it was because my uncles couldn’t keep their racism in check.

It comes to me as no surprise, that my grandfather... a former police chief... turned out to be racist as fuck too... but I had the luxury of finding this out on facebook 2 years after he has been dead via my cousin who claimed that in his final years my beloved grandfather was viament blue lives matter supporter and kicked black and hispanic care givers out of his home...even hitting one with his cane... but ya know what... fuck em all. It may disgust me... I may have been sick a view times this morning whilst I processed this all... but yeah.. fuck em all is still a damn good stance.

My shitty ass racist as fuck white, con artists piece of human garbage father walked out on me... my shitty ass fake liberal family turned their back on their daughter who feel in love with a black man... who took me in as his own when my biological dad walked out.... this at 26 years old mind you... 

His family did the same. They loved me like one of their own. I was treated no diffrent that any other grandchildren. My parents worked 4 jobs between them so Grandma and Grandaddy watched my brother and I all the time. My best childhood memories are in her warm, vibratent home. Where everyone was welcome and everyone was fed. When Grandma was teaching the girls to braid... she told me “You ain’t got hair that need braided but you got fingers right? get that scrawny little behind over here and learn...” and even though my uncoordinated ass could never braid... she still loved me. She still called me Snoopy... and I still miss her every damn day. I don’t miss my Gram everyday... I miss Grandma... She is the one person, more than anyone I wish I could talk to about all this because she had opinions and she never shyed away from voicing them.

I know who loved me. I know who cherished me and still does. Who told me just saturday... he was proud of the woman I have become... that I am good mom... that he knows when the time comes there will be no better advocate for my young, black, ND brother and he knows he is in the most capable hands. Which honestly... there are no words to express what that ment to me. Even typing it I am teary.

Which is why... I went to war with my own blood today. 

I now have nothing left but the few chosen family... and my step-dad and brother.... and I am good with that. 

Because fuck having bunch of fake self proclaimed “open minded east coast liberals” but really a bunch of Trump voting ,“Blue Lives Matter” mother fuckers in my family defending a cop who killed a black man that easily could have been my brother. FUCK THAT. 

I was taught to be quite about matters of race. My step-dad told me it “wasn’t a subject that people liked to talk about” and that “Most people don’t want to understand, so don’t waste your time trying to make them”. I have been keeping in close contact with my step-dad these last few days. He told me over the weekend he was wrong. He should have taught me earlier to use my profound privilege of being an eloquent, well read, “beautiful” (dad’s always say that shit lol) white woman to call out the profound racism that our family experienced at the hands of our own flesh and blood. 

So like any good daughter... I did... I called out them and they didn’t like it... and I am still shocked I am okay with that.

 Then I came out publicly to whole of everyone who knows me as BI... after 15 years with only fandom and close friends knowning... you know... just to weed out the fucking homophobes while I am it too.

[elizastrange]

So one of my friends posted the "we're a culture not a costume" photo

And, as expected, it was filled with fail. 

There was the white male asshole who said,

"However consider this: I dress up as Colonel Claus Von Stauffenberg in a nazi uniform, and trick-or-treat in a predominately Jewish neighborhood. Would most of them find insult? Yes, because of their stupidity. Not because of my portrayal of a German hero."

Then there was the one black man in this whole conversation of 46 comments who shared his personal story,

"True story: my first gig ever was a Halloween show for a private party at a rented hall in my then new, suburban neighborhood. I was 17 at the time, and the only black kid in my entire neighborhood. As we were setting up to play, I saw a guy dressed a KKK klansman walk through. In a panic, I gathered my gear and disappeared into the next room, scared shitless.

Luckily, one of my other bandmates figured out what was happening, talked to guy who then came back to explain that "hey man, I'm not a klansman, this is just costume, just my way of poking fun at them, and scaring the shit out of people". To which I sighed, finished the set, and he bought my a drink after (my first in my new neighborhood I might add).

Moral of story/lesson learned: There are many reasons why people pick the costumes they wear for Halloween, but what's great about Halloween is that is gives EVERYONE a license to parody. EVERYONE. Modern Halloween, for one day, is our license to forget about cultural divisions, whether real or imagined, and be someone else for a little while, for whatever our reasons happen to be.

IMO it needs to stay that way, and the OP needs to lighten up. No one culture is special over another, and in it's own way Modern Halloween teaches that. This is a good thing."

Oh, and a fellow white girl decides to chime in:

As I said in the comment, I can see some of it. But I actually love asian culture. If I dressed up as a geisha for whatever reason, it would be an insult or some kinda of racist joke. I just don't like how in the past several months I've read SO MUCH about people getting in arms about something being racist when it really isn't meant to be. And don't get me started on the double standards I've seen. But yes, I completely respect everyone's culture and their heritage. I found the middle eastern guy a tiny bit distasteful, I'll admit.

"the middle eastern guy" is a reference to the original picture featuring white people in yellow face and black face. But only "the middle eastern guy" was the one she found offensive. Okay then. 

Jesus. Fitzgerald. Christ.