#v[neu]
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never shutting the fuck up ab this pv or song
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flyer v-band ~spring festival tour 2014~ ~scanned by me
#visual kei#my scans#honestly i don't know anything about this i just bought it for 20 cents on vinted don't ask too much#gotcharocka#black gene for the next scene#v[neu]#HERO#vkei#flyers#j rock#visual-kei
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ZZZ Basil getting out Iaijutsu'd by Miyabi / Yanagi / ZZZ Seth:
#[ musings ]#[ shitposts ]#[ muse: basileus ]#[ V: ZZZ ]#(i know you already have something cooked up for Seth Neu)
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-- @inundatae \\ un plotted starter. ( starter call )
❝ Enough !! ❞ A voice was heard all over the streets of fontaine, busy commoners had to stop && take a look at the growing commotion between the two most popular beings in the said nation --- well used to be two , but now it is only just one.
Apologies after apologies , she had been receiving here && there , it's as if a broken record that eventually had lost it's sense of meaning. At first it was appreciated, but at this point -- it's getting annoying , && how could she move on if everytime, she meets the hydro dragon sovereign, it was the first thing he has to say.
She pinched the bridge of her nose as her legs dangled off the sit she was seating on . ❝ I told you already , it's alright -- && you don't need to apologize any further, geez you're like a broken record , Monsuier Neuvilette ; 500 years && you don't still know when an apology started to become stale. ❞ she huffed before a piece of cake was pushed to her mouth , hand placed on her cheeks to enjoy the sugary sweet that overwhelms the white haired fontainian. ❝ It starts to sound less genuine now, it won't look believable to your viewers ya know ~ ❞ she teased.
#/ f u r i n a / - self#/ n e u v i l e t t e / - Pawn#/ I n a n d a t a e / - viewer#furina knows he is sorry and she gets it plus why does he have to blame himself#furina and neu needs to move onnn
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i rlly thought this song was trash first time i heard u.u gurl
alas- I am AWAKE and metabolising joy when I hear this :D
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❤︎ ₊ ⊹ get free (1/3)
pic creds luvpngs | gif creds akashi-tetsuki
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ pairing: asylum patient!nikolai x asylum attendant!fem!reader
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ genre: v suggestive w/ plot (yasssss); read at your own discretion
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ content warnings: unhealthy relationships, infidelity, slightly yandere(?) nikolai, dubious consent, nikolai himself is a warning lol, also sorry if the asylum! au is inaccurate
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ summary: reader is an asylum attendant and is assigned to their newest admit nikolai gogol. ALSO this fic is heavily inspired by @/cherikolya's fic she's the one i'm running with- pls check it out and support her! also i'm splitting this up into 2 parts bc watching the aot anime has been breaking me and consuming all my thoughts, but i still want to post:( ˚₊‧꒰ა read pt 2 & pt 3 & bonus (bad ending) ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ word count: 5.7k (oops...what can i say nikolai makes me delulu)
"Nikolai Gogol. Age 26. Male. Charged with terrorism, first-degree murder, and treason among other things, but he got off with an insanity plea. Look over his file before he comes in later." The man behind the desk tossed the neat file carelessly onto the acrylic surface, exhaling boredly after giving his monotone rundown.
"I'm being assigned to him? But I already have other patients to take care of!" You inquired, fists forming at your sides as you already imagined the overtime and exhaustion you were going to rack up.
"Attendants don't grow on trees, do they? Don't assume I'll give you special treatment. Besides, I'm handing your other patients off to the new girls, so you'll be able to focus on Gogol. He's high priority." The man butted back.
Tch. You sighed and grabbed the file, mumbling a "fine" and turning to leave his office.
"Goodbye, dear." He spat it out like venom with a forced smile. You glanced back once more at the man: your boss⎯or rather husband⎯before heading out the door. You two were simply a marriage of convenience⎯a business transaction. In exchange for funding to build a new asylum on par with Mersault to rehabilitate criminals, your father had offered your hand in marriage to his business partner's son, who had become entranced by your beauty after seeing you once in your father's office. He wasn't too bad of a man at first, and you both related over your occupation together, but your marriage started to go sour after he realized you weren't just a pretty face or obedient wife, and it worsened after his narcissism and egocentricity started to show. He was too traditional and trapped you in his cage of rules and regulations. Even sharing the same bed and having dinner together couldn't reignite the nonexistent spark between you.
You walked back to your office and closed the door behind you before making yourself some herbal tea to calm your nerves. Laying down on the plush couch in the middle of your room, you looked through your new patient's file, trying to memorize all the details.
Nikolai Gogol, huh? What kind of person are you? You shivered reading the list of his crimes, which seemed endless and cruel.
An hour or so had passed before you heard a soft knock at your door. "Miss?" Another attendant had come to fetch you. "Your patient is waiting for you in the white ward." The white ward was where "high priority" or more dangerous patients were kept.
"I'll be out in a moment!" You called out, getting up from the couch and tidying up the space before fixing your hair and pulling down your uniform. It was a black flowy dress with puffy bell sleeves and a white rounded collar. The dress itself was a bit too short, being designed and chosen by your gross and perverted lovely husband. You walked out the comfort of your office and followed the attendant to the white ward.
˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
"Miss, this is your patient Nikolai Gogol". The attendant gestured to the tall man standing in the hallway outside of his room. He was strapped and held by two guards, with several others surrounding him holding special guns. He had a neutral smile on his face that turned upwards upon seeing you. You couldn't help but be momentarily mesmerized by the man in front of you. He wore a loose white button up and white linen pants⎯the standard male patient uniform⎯and his white hair was messily layered with a long, neat braid on his shoulder. His eyes were the most captivating to you, one emerald and full of life and the other a dull blue with a scar. Without the jester attire donned in his file pictures, he actually looked quite...handsome and prince-like?
You snapped yourself back to reality after remembering who you were dealing with and bowed slightly, just enough to stop your dress from riding up.
Observing the situation, you could sense the belligerence seething from everyone else. Not that you could blame them, the new patient was a dangerous anarchist. Your personal philosophy was always to treat the patient as humanely as possible in order to build trust and security, so you tried to not think about your new patient's file information. Just focus on diffusing the energy of the space and getting the jester to somewhat like you.
"Hello, Nikolai. I'm your attendant and will be taking care of you for the duration of your stay here," You looked back up and smiled gently at him, starkly contrasting the hostile glares from the other attendant and guards. "Let's get along, okay?"
Nikolai's eyes widened immediately and he tried to move closer to you. "Whaaaa! Nice to meet you, pretty miss! I can't believe such a beautiful girl is taking care of me!" The two guards forcibly stopped him from taking another step and the others pointed their guns at him.
Nikolai frowned and stopped squirming. "Hey! All I did was talk! Put those scary things away!" He giggled as the guards retracted their guns slowly and stuck his tongue out at the other attendant, who looked disgusted yet scared. He wasn't intimidated or scared at all. The guards then opened the door to Nikolai's room and placed him sitting down on his bed. Before you could follow to begin debriefing, the other attendant tugged on your arm lightly.
You turned back at looked at her. She had a fluffy blonde bob, light green eyes, and freckles. Lacey, one of the young new hires your husband mentioned earlier. "Um Miss, aren't we supposed to follow the script when interacting with patients? I thought smiling at them and speaking casually promoted unwanted feelings and was unprofessional?" You cringed, loathing that she sounded just like your husband when he was lecturing.
You shot her a fake sugary smile, "Oh, yes, I usually just take a softer approach with more unstable patients. Don't want them to stab you in the back immediately, do you?" You tried to answer lightheartedly, but your efforts clearly failed by the way Lacey had a horrified look on her face from your little joke, like it was the worst answer you could've said. You awkwardly coughed and put your hand on her shoulder.
"Right, thanks for reminding me, Lacey. It's great that you remembered the boss's words." Rolling your eyes once your back was turned to her, you stepped into Nikolai's room. You already dreaded Lacey telling your husband about you deviating from protocol and the long talk he would have with you at home.
"Four of us will be staying here to observe the debrief, Miss. This man is dangerous." You nodded as each of the four the guards stood in a corner of the room and the rest filed out of the room. You pulled up a stool and sat down, giving your new patient a run down of his daily schedule and how the asylum operated. The whole time, his eyes watched you excitedly like a puppy and he giggled and nodded frequently in between your sentences. It was strange and unsettling, but you were slightly relieved you didn't have to deal with an aggressive patient.
Scooting closer to Nikolai, you pulled out a small water bottle and a case of different pills. "These are your daily meds, Nikolai. I'll come to give these to you every morning at six before breakfast. I'll monitor your progress and adjust your dosage as time goes on." He nodded as you stood up and placed the water bottle on the stool, putting on a white latex glove and pouring the pills out into your hand. "I'm going to be administering them to you just for today. Open your mouth and don't close it until I'm done, okay?"
"Okay, missy! I'll be a good boy and try not to bite your pretty fingers off!" Nikolai perked up and giggled like a child getting candy. You mentally cringed and prepared yourself for the worst as you stepped towards him. What could you expect? This man was dangerous and had no reason to listen to you. The guards tensed up as you moved closer and pointed their guns at the jester's face. You swallowed as Nikolai opened his mouth, obnoxiously saying "ahhhhhhhh" and bouncing in his spot lightly.
Heartbeat increasing, you placed your free hand under Nikolai's jaw, thumb supporting his chin and lifted his face up slightly to you as you dropped the pills into his mouth. Mind racing and anxiousness clouding your vision, you missed the way he gaze softened. He closed his mouth and leaned into your touch more, nuzzling your delicate fingers. You swiftly pulled away, turning your head back to grab the water bottle behind you, attempting to hide the light rose that dusted your cheeks, unsure of whether it was from fear or embarrassment. Nikolai's eyes were still intently on you, so you secretly hoped he had missed that.
As you opened up the water bottle and stepped back towards Nikolai again, he shook his head. "I already swallowed them, I don't need any water, miss attendant." He opened his mouth again to show you proof before you sighed out an "okay" and tightened the cap back on. You grabbed the empty pill case before gesturing to the guards to put their guns down. They complied and two came over to slowly undo the restraints on his upper body, making sure to hold him back immediately after.
"Well, Nikolai, that's all for today. Thank you, and I⎯"
"Whoa, missy, you have a ring! Too bad you're already married!" Nikolai interrupted, his head poking up but quickly being pushed down by one of the guards. You cursed yourself silently as you froze in place. Since you had to move around a lot and constantly clean, you wore your wedding ring on a simple gold chain as a necklace instead. It was usually tucked under your uniform, but it must have slipped out when you were laying on your couch earlier. You cleared your throat awkwardly, tucking your necklace back into your uniform and trying to get rid of the instinctive frown on your face that appeared anytime your partner was mentioned.
"Yes, I'm married. Anyways⎯"
“But you held my face so lovingly just now. Won't your husband get mad? You're supposed to do that to him, not your new captive, right?"
You tightened your fists at that.
"That man…does he treat you well, pryntsesa?" Even though his head was held down, his dark gaze still cut into you, now not as innocent as it was before. You were sure the cheeky man was smirking too, taunting you with an otherwise harmless question.
You let out a fake laugh and an even faker wide smile in response, just eager to leave and go home now. Whatever charm you had your patient initially under had clearly faded away. "I'll see you tomorrow at six, Mr. Gogol." Nikolai's smirk turned down after hearing the name change, but quickly turned back up again followed by loud hysterical laughs⎯unbeknownst to you, who had already left his room.
"So the little ptashka wants to play games, does she?"
˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
"Thanks for dinner, dear." Your husband said, wiping his mouth with a neatly folded handkerchief.
Shocking. Is he being...nice?
"Of course, I've already packed your lunch for tomorrow, too." You replied, occupied washing dishes and organizing the kitchen again.
"So, how was your first encounter with Gogol?" He inquired, walking over to you to put his dishes into the sink and lean against the counter beside you. You stopped for a moment, surprised he was making conversation with you today, as he usually retreated back to your shared bedroom or went to the living room to watch the news.
You were about to start until you noticed his brows furrowed and his arms crossed. You took your rubber gloves off and placed them next to you.
Oh boy, he's about to lecture me, isn't he?
"What are you really trying to say?"
He exhaled. "Well, Lacey⎯"
That snitch. You couldn't believe her.
"Ahhh, Lacey. The sweet young new girl you hired as extra help. What about her?" Your spouse's eyes narrowed.
"Respect your coworkers, dear. Lacey told me about your unprofessional interaction with Gogol. Smiling at a murderer and treating patients as friends doesn't exactly align with the asylum's values, now does it?" He said sternly.
"I was just trying to immobilize him. You can't exactly make a patient trust you when everyone's just shooting daggers at them, y'know?" He didn't look convinced. "Besides, this has always been my approach since I started in this field, and it's never failed me. You more than anyone should know I have the most successful recoveries among all the staff."
"Fine. Just make sure your unorthodox tendencies don't rub off on the other staff." He looked down at your neck. "And don't tuck your necklace under your uniform anymore. Don't want all the delinquents getting the wrong idea. You're off the market now" He lifted the chain of your necklace and traced the outline of the ring before letting go and walking to grab his coat and a pack of cigarettes.
"Going outside for a smoke break. You should get to bed and get some sleep for the long day tomorrow" He replied before walking out the door, your eyes following him.
You didn't miss the way he swiftly grabbed the keys and fixed his hair before leaving.
˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
"Good morning, dove!" Nikolai chirped upon you entering his room.
"Good morning, Nikolai. Did you sleep well?" You asked softly, taking his medication out and handing it to him, along with some Ukrainian candy.
"Mmhmm, yes I did! I had a sweet dream, too, doll, but I can't tell you what it was about!" He said excitedly. Used to his antics, you only laughed in response and watched as he took his pills⎯still without water for whatever reason and unwrapped the minky binky candy, popping it into his mouth.
Five weeks. That was how long it'd been since Nikolai was admitted to the asylum.
Despite your initial worries of dealing with a monster, you and Nikolai had gotten along quite well. He seemed to only listen to you, though, much to the dismay of the other attendants. It was beneficial for you though, since it meant you didn't have to work overtime seeing to other patients.
Nikolai had developed a habit of calling you by anything but your name, bestowing several different pet names on you⎯a new upgrade from "miss" and "missy".
He also became increasingly touchy with you as well: constantly holding your hand⎯intertwining his fingers with yours, braiding your hair, and hugging you when he felt "cold". Perhaps you were desensitized to it or just touch starved, but you rarely complained about it. You would rather keep him happy and easy to deal with, anyways.
"Look, pretty girl, I finished all my meds!" Nikolai exclaimed as he opened his mouth to show you proof that he swallowed them all.
You gave him a friendly smile. "You aren't having any bad side effects from your meds, are you?" You found it a bit odd that Nikolai's dosage never changed, since no one could pinpoint his exact condition. It made your job easy, though, so you tried not to think much about it.
"No ma'am. I had some trouble sleeping at first, but it's all gone now!" He stood up from his bed and watched as you straightened it up⎯simultaneously checking for anything suspicious. There never was anything somehow.
His hands loosely wrapped around your waist as he pressed himself against your bent back and rested his chin on your shoulder, causing you to push your hands into the sheets and wrinkle the thin blanket. You let out a surprised squeal when you felt his warm breath on your ear.
"Love, can we eat breakfast in the courtyard today?" He whispered softly, nuzzling into the crook of your neck. You felt yourself blushing as you turned around and pushed him away, his hands still remaining on your waist.
"Y-Yes, N-Nikolai, we can go to the courtyard today." You said, finally stepping away to be free of his touch just for him to hold your hand. He flashed a happy smile at you while skipping out the door, tugging you along with him.
"Yayyyy! Me and ptashka are going on a date~"
"...It's not a date, silly." You replied back, blush still faintly across your cheeks.
˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
You inhaled the fresh courtyard air, still holding hands with Nikolai as you walked on the cobblestone path. His breakfast to-go box and your lunchbox were on the nearby bench; you both already ate, but Nikolai basically ate most of your food, claiming the dining hall food was "stale and dry" compared to the pillowy cream puffs you'd brought.
"Wahhhh! Look at the fishies, dove!" Nikolai exclaimed, waving his finger at the koi fish swimming in the fountain. They eagerly swam towards him, probably thinking he was going to feed them. He giggled, eyes focusing in on two of the fish.
"Don't those two look like us, love?" You were snapped out of your previous trance and looked down to see a black koi fish and a larger white koi fish together cuddling into each other.
"Oh, I guess they do. Because of our uniforms, right?" You looked back up to Nikolai to see him frowning and still staring at the fish.
"No, dove, because they're in love..." He said lowly, to the point where you almost couldn't hear him. His gaze softened as he looked back down at you and cupped your face gently.
In love? Us?
Eyes widened, you felt confused as you looked away, not sure how to respond or think. The sudden action caused Nikolai's hands to drop away from your face. You closed your eyes, not wanting to see his disappointed face as you stammered, "We're not in lo⎯"
Your eyes flew open again as you felt something hard in your hand.
A bouquet of lavender roses was in your hand, with Nikolai giving you a big grin with his hands behind his back. "Pretty flowers for my pretty girl." You blushed, forgetting about what had just happened. You had always loved roses and their romantic charm.
When was the last time your husband brought you flowers?
"Lavender roses symbolize delight and love at first sight. They remind me of you." Your eyes widened again as you looked up, Nikolai turning serious and gazing at you affectionately, like you were really lovers.
You found yourself getting lost in his heterochromatic eyes. Somehow, you felt peaceful like this. Even though he was a dangerous criminal. Even though your heart was already sworn to another man.
"Thank you, Nikolai. They're beautiful." You said smiling at him, this time being genuine and not passive. You were falling into a serene state, only able to focus on him. His action had somehow touched your conflicted heart and put you in a good mood.
He laughed happily in response, pleased by your reaction. "You look lovely when you smile like that, sweetheart." He pulled your other hand back to the bench so you could sit.
"Also, you should give me a nickname, too. I have so many, but you only call me Nikolai~" He pouted, scooting next to you on the bench.
"Hmmmm...What should I call you then? Niko? 'Lai? Nikolas...?" You pondered, both of you slightly cringing at all of the options, each one sounding worse than the previous one.
"I know!" Nikolai exclaimed, grabbing your hands⎯still holding the flower bouquet⎯and clasping them together, "Kolya. Call me Kolya. That's what my close friends and family would call me!"
Family? You mean the ones you murdered? You tried to shake the thought.
"Kol⎯Ahh!" You cried out as you felt a deep prick on your left ring finger. You pulled your hand away from Nikolai's and dropped the bouquet, watching the blood drip down your finger and down to your thigh.
Nikolai's eyes filled with concern, "Love! You're hurt!" He rushedly rummaged through his breakfast box and his pockets, trying to find a napkin to stop the bleeding. You tried to calm him down, telling him you were fine, but he wouldn't listen.
Suddenly, he seized your left hand and brought it to his mouth, closing his lips around your ring finger. Shivers ran down your spine as you felt him running his tongue over your finger, getting every last drop of blood and kissing the spot slowly when he finished.
Heat rushed into your cheeks as the air felt thick, no longer serene and peaceful. Nikolai's eyes darkened, and an unreadable expression fell on his face.
"There's still some there, dove." He gazed down at the blood that had dripped onto your thigh. Your stomach churned at the thought of what he would do next as he pushed you down onto the bench and brought his lips to your inner thigh, leaving soft kitten licks all over the spot and lightly groaning.
"Niko⎯Kolya, s-stop⎯" You tried suppressing the moan threatening to spill out from the contact on your sensitive skin. You tried to push him away softly, but he wouldn't stop, now pressing light kisses that travelled up your thigh to your sweet spot. He was getting close. Too close.
You pushed his head away, not trying to be soft anymore, and sat up again, moving to the far side of the bench. You pulled down your dress again to cover your now reddened thigh.
"W-We can't do this. It's wrong. You're my patient, and I'm your attendant. And..." You hesitated, regaining your composure, "...And I'm married." You said, biting your tongue. The gold necklace suddenly felt heavy around your neck, like it was pulling you down.
Nikolai laughed bitterly, "You don't love him though, myla. He's kept you trapped in a cage. Is that what you want, dove? Do you want to be trapped in his cage?"
"I⎯"
"Miss! Mr. Gogol! There you two are! We've been looking everywhere for you both. There's a group wellness activity starting for all the patients, and they're waiting on you." You turned around to hear a familiar high-pitched voice.
Lacey. The snitch new girl.
You put on a fake smile. "My apologies, I completely lost track of time. Lacey, you can escort Nikolai to the group's meeting spot. I'll be retiring to my office for the rest of the day." She nodded as you grabbed the bouquet and your lunchbox and took one last look at Nikolai before standing up from the bench and turning away, "I'll see you tomorrow, Nikolai." You didn't wait for a response back.
It felt too awkward. Everything felt confusing; you knew your place but you also wanted to be free. You liked Nikolai but you didn't know if those feelings could be considered love. You surely didn't love your husband...
All you could do was hold onto the roses and gaze up at a dove flying across the sky. For a moment, you wished to be like that dove. To be elegant, at peace, and loved.
You wished to be free.
˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
Taking a deep breath, you forced yourself to scan your access card and enter Nikolai's room. Today was a special day, after all.
"Good morn⎯"
"Love! You're finally here! I was waiting for you~" Nikolai exclaimed as he lunged towards you, burying his face into your neck. He wasn't wrong; The extra time you spent collecting your thoughts and debating going in or not made you two minutes late.
You lightly pushed Nikolai away⎯not before he caught your hands and intertwined them with his again⎯and tried to put a neutral smile on your face. "Nikolai, I have good news for you."
His face lit up as he clasped your hands and brought them towards his chest, "What is it, dove? Are you divorcing your husband and leaving him for me?" He shook your hands excitedly as you eyed him disappointingly. He really wasn't going to drop this lovesick act, was he?
You shook your head and cleared your throat, "No, as a reward for good behavior, you can choose a special place to visit and an item to keep in your room. Your options are the courtyard, the gy⎯"
"The library. I want a book to read." Nikolai stated, suddenly turning serious, taking you slightly aback; you didn't take him as the type to be able to sit still and read for a long time.
"Alright, the library it is then. Take your meds first, and then we can go, 'kay?" He nodded excitedly as you turned away from him to make his bed and do the usual check. Nothing suspicious, as usual.
˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
The guard greeted you both as you approached the grand library doors. It was an old wooden room with tall glass windows that contrasted the relatively short bookshelves. It wasn't exactly a popular destination for patients, so the books were mostly dated and collecting dust. The natural light inside made it one of your favorite break spots during your trainee days, so it was a bit nostalgic for you.
"There are security cameras around the library, but radio in if anything happens." The guard explained sternly, looking over at Nikolai and then you, "Do you need assistance with your patient, or will you two be fine alone?"
You shifted your gaze over to Nikolai, who had a slightly mischievous smile on his face but maintained a serious expression. "We'll be fine alone. He'll behave." The guard nodded at you before opening the door and letting you two in. The door shut firmly and you tried to grab Nikolai's hand, but he dashed away from you towards the large stained glass window before turning to face you.
"It's so big in here, ptashka. I haven't been in a library in sooooooo long. I actually love to read, y'know?" He said, smiling and motioning for you to join him. The colorful stained glass reflected on his face, casting multicolored kaleidoscopes on his face.
You joined him, admiring his beauty momentarily before leaning against the window and crossing your arms. "I didn't know that, no. To be honest, I didn't think you were much of a reader.." You said lightly with a giggle.
Nikolai grinned back, "Heh. There's a lot you don't know about me, dove." He looked away, lowering his voice a bit, "But that's fine. You'll have plenty of time to learn everything later~" You looked at him confusedly, not quite catching what he said, but you remembered the reason you came and grabbed his hand again.
"Anyways, was there a particular book you were looking for? I know this place pretty well." He laughed in response.
"Ah, is that so? Well, I'm looking for The Overcoat. It's my favorite book." Nikolai said proudly, like he was trying to impress you with his literature selection.
"The books are sorted by last name. Do you know the author?" You asked, leading him towards the bookshelves. Nikolai just squeezed your hand and started skipping forward at a fast pace, practically dragging you behind him as he started giggling hysterically.
"Nope! Not a clue, hehe~" You paused and frowned at him. Who didn't even know the author of their "favorite" book? "The genre's fiction, though, if it helps~" Nikolai said giddily, turning towards you and swinging your arms from side to side. You sighed and slowly headed over to the fiction section. There were about 1,000 books to go through, so you weren't exactly too excited. Not that it bummed you out too much, though, since your husband had asked you to help the new girls clean if you finished early with patient duties. You supposed you'd rather spend your time with Nikolai finding his book.
You both agreed to search the shelves simultaneously, Nikolai looking on the higher shelves and you on the shorter ones. The space between shelves was quite narrow, making his chest rub against your back several times. He wasn't shy either, grabbing your hips to maneuver past you, causing you to jolt when he pressed himself behind you.
Starting to lose count of how many books and shelves you'd checked, you were falling into a tired daze until Nikolai's sudden shout woke you up. "I found it, dove! I'm the winner! Me, me, me!" You looked over to Nikolai, who now had his book in his hands, and shot him a relieved smile.
He hurriedly headed towards you as you gave him some congratulatory praise. "Guess our work's done here, then. Let's get some lunch and call it a da⎯"
He hugged you suddenly, making you yelp as he giggled and wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling your back against him. He leaned in by your ear, squeezing you tighter, inhaling your scent, "Say, dove, do you still have the roses I gave you from the courtyard?" You perked up toward him as he smiled, awaiting your response.
You did. You'd placed them in a small glass vase⎯trimming the thorns off⎯and put it on your dresser. Somehow, the sickly sweet smell was stronger in your room than it was in the courtyard. "Yeah," you smiled, "They're in a vase by my dresser. I couldn't bring myself to get rid of them because of how beautiful they were." Nikolai snickered at that, delighted that you'd cherished his little gift.
He slowly smirked, "Your husband doesn't give you flowers, does he?" You tensed up a bit under his arms but relaxed again, frowning and looking down.
"No, he doesn't. I think the last time was during our honeymoon." Nikolai cuddled into your neck after that, rubbing your sides like he was trying to comfort you.
"What a shame, love. You should leave him for me. He doesn't deserve you." Nikolai said, his teeth barely grazing your ear, sending shivers down your spine. Was the space always this narrow?
"I can't. It doesn't work like tha⎯"
"Why not, though? Leave him for me. I'm actually perfectly sane, y'know? I know how to make you happy, how to free you from his cage..." He paused, "How to touch you..." His hands on your waist trailed down, pushing your skirt up higher.
"H-hey!" You stammered, stopping his hands from going further with your own, "We can't do this. There are cameras here." You anxiously looked around, trying to find them, but Nikolai's hand grabbed your face and pulled it back down to him.
"Shhhhhh. Stop worrying, myla. This is a blind spot. It's covered by the light, see?" He tilted your face up slowly again toward the camera, which was in fact covered by a big, dusty lantern. How convenient.
He pushed your skirt up again and grinded himself on you, and you swore you could feel his bulge pressing up against you. "You've been driving me crazy, dove, since yesterday I've only been able to think about you," he grunted, slipping his hands into your loosened dress and under your lacy bra to palm and squeeze your breasts. "The sounds you made...I wanna hear them again."
Your head was screaming at you to run away and get the guard, but you couldn't ignore the wet spots on your matching lace panties from your arousal. To be honest, you didn't remember the last time you'd been this intimate with anyone, and your body was clearly craving touch. Your breath hitched as Nikolai kissed below your ear, working his way down to the crook of your neck. You were starting to feel lightheaded.
Becoming more desperate for a reaction, Nikolai suddenly pinched your sensitive nipples and bit down on your neck, causing you to yelp in pleasure. "A-ahh K-Kolya⎯" The sudden impact caused you to push back against his clothed member and grip onto the sturdy shelf in front of you for support. You could feel him grinning in satisfaction, letting out a low groan.
"Mmm there's the pretty noise I wanted to hear~" Nikolai replaced his lips with his tongue, trailing slowly up and down your neck as you kept bucking against him, needing more friction. "Dove," he heaved as you mewled upon feeling his tip brush against your clit through eachother's clothes. He couldn't handle seeing you start to lose yourself. "F-fuck, kiss me".
Nikolai grabbed your hips suddenly and turned you around, so your back was against the wooden shelf. You looked up at his face; he was panting heavily, eyes filled with lust, and a few strands loose from his usual kept braid. The sight of him made your cheeks flush and your panties even wetter. You wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him in, bringing one hand to his lips and tracing his bottom lip with your thumb. You gazed intently at his lips. Just one kiss will be fine, right?
Both of your noses were practically rubbing against each other as Nikolai started to dip down. "Kolya, I⎯"
BAM!
You instinctively pulled away as you recognized the sound of the old library door being kicked down. As the stomping of the guards' boots grew closer, you pushed Nikolai off your body and fixed your dress. Nikolai shot you a surprised glance as the guards knocked down the heavy bookshelves to open up the space around the two of you, eliminating the narrow confines. You couldn't process what was happening as five guards circled around Nikolai, drawing their guns and pointing them at him as he put his hands up. Another guard was slowly approaching you, lifting the walkie talkie up to his mouth.
"06, copy. Patient Gogol has been surrounded and apprehended successfully. We're on our way to the interrogation room," He glanced over to you, still sitting down in shock, "His attendant's here, too. We'll bring her to you, Boss."
Boss? Your husband? Shit, had you been caught?
You were so lost in your thoughts that you didn't even notice Nikolai being handcuffed and pushed out the door⎯or the way he looked back at you⎯until the guard put his hand on your shoulder and called out your name. "Miss, we need to get going. We'll explain everything once we're with the boss again." He helped you up as you trailed slowly behind him with a churning stomach and The Overcoat clutched tightly in your arms.
˚₊‧꒰ა part 2 ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
˚₊‧꒰ა part 3 ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
#vanilladove#vanilladovebsd#bungo stray dogs#nikolai x reader#nikolai gogol x reader#nikolai smut#bsd smut#bungou stray dogs#bsd#nikolai gogol x reader smut#nikolai gogol#nikolai gogol smut#nikolai x reader smut#bsd x reader#bungo stray dogs x reader#not me having to rewrite this twice bc tumblr didnt save properly#way too many words lol#splitting this up into 3 parts bc aot has been breaking me
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This is a webweave for a Gerry Keay/Michael Shelley fanfic based on The Magnus Archives
I want to be home to you: The Whispering and the Reckoning web weave
for @blasphemous-lies-and-deceit <3
Elden Ring // Elden Ring // tumblr user @/s0larize (x) // In Bed, The Kiss by Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec // tumblr user @/perfectlyripeclementine // Savior by Lee Hi (music video) // Savior by Lee Hi // tumblr user @/b0nkcreat // Trista Mateer // Savior by Lee Hi (music video) // The Internet Speaks Back to the Author by Phil Kaye // The Kiss by Edvard Munch // Zhenya Katava & Neus Bermejo for V Magazine, photography by Gus & Lo // Aristotle and Dante Dive into the Waters of the World by Benjamin Alire Sáenz
Image description in ALT text and under the cut.
Image ID 1: Screenshot of a notification from Elden Ring on dark grey background. White text: You have not sinned. Text in response button: OK. The button is highlighted.
Image ID 2: Screenshot of a notification from Elden Ring on dark grey background. White text: You don't need absolution. Text in response button: OK. The button is highlighted.
Image ID 3: A photo of a person holding a bottle of purple nail polish in their hands, painting someone's nails. Their shirt is black with a red graphic print on it that includes a word "love". Their own nails are the same shade of metallic purple as the polish they're holding. You can't see their face as it's cut off.
Image ID 4: A painting of two people laying in bed. They're embracing each other and kissing. The person on the left has red hair slightly past their shoulders. The person on the right has short red hair. They're covered up to their chest by the blanket. The sheets and the blanket are white.
Image ID 5: Sccreenshot of a tumblr post from a user @perfectlyripeclementine. Black text on white background: calling my lover "mine" but not in the way that my toothbrush or notebook are mine, mine in the way my neighborhood is mine, and also everybody else's, "mine" like mine to tend to, mine to care for, mine to love. "mine" not like possession but devotion. End of text.
Image ID 6: A screenshot from a music video. A Korean man with black hair and black eyes is sitting on a low couch. He's wearing a white shirt with a red outline on the collar and black pants. His legs are slightly spread. A Korean woman with black hair and black eyes is laying on her side with her head in his lap. She's on the right side of the man. She's wearing a long white dress and her hands are clasped in her own lap. In the background you can see a church altar.
Image ID 7: Screenshot of lyrics. Black text on white background: Is there such a thing as love without despair? // Where will you be taking me? Yeah, yeah // Will you be able to stay by my side // As long as I wish you to? Hm. End of text.
Image ID 8: A screenshot of a Tumblr ask. Anonymous said: "do you think it'll all be okay?" User b0nkcreat, who has a blue and a green checkmark near their username, responds: "yeah. even if it won't i've got people to love in the meantime".
Image ID 9: Screenshot of black text on white background: In this space right here that we have made for each other, [text highlighted in light blue] you can say anything and I will not abandon you [highlighting ends]. Unwrap the worst things you have done. Watch me hold them up to the light and not even flinch.
Image ID 10: Screenshot from a music video. A Korean woman with dark hair and dark eyes is in the center of the shot, facing the camera. She's hugging a dark-haired man with her right hand, looking to her right side. The man is wearing a dark shirt with white vertical stripes in the center of the back. He's hiding his face in the woman's shoulder. In the background you can see the inside of a church, an altar and reliefs of saints on the walls.
Image ID 11: Screenshot of black text on white background: tell me what you want // [text italicized] every door you enter // I will let you in [italicized text ends]
Image ID 12: A painting of two people kissing. The person on the left is wearing a dark red suit, they have black hair. They're leaning against a green nightstand. A person on the right is wearing long black dress with red outlining the sleeves and the collar. They're hugging the other person by their neck. As the two are kissing, their faces are featurless, melting into each other.
Image ID 13: A photo of two people's hands. They're holding each other by the pinkies. The person on the left has light skin and is wearing a dark blue sleeveless dress. The person on the right is wearing a dark blue dress with buttoned cuffs on the sleeves. Nothing beyond the arms and a piece of their skirts can be seen. The arms are entangled with a red string from the middle of the forearm to the tips of the fingers of both hands. The photo is framed with a digital black frame.
Image ID 14: Screenshot of black text on white background: "We have to go home." // "I'm already home. I'm with you."
#gerrymichael#web weave#webweaving#the whispering and the reckoning#sorry not sorry for so much from savior it's a song i associate with this fic a lot#anyways happy last tw&r friday!#i've had this in my drafts since October 27th :D
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─────•~✮❆✮~•─────
Intro attempt
─────•~✮❆✮~•─────
⛧~~Hii. My main name is Yasha, but I use many names (Maru/Snow/Kurt/Murasaki/Shinya/Piper/Noel/Cyan/Fawn/Stefan/Serafim), I'm 19/619 yo, he/xe/vamp, alterhuman, transmasculine, non binary, transandrogyne, xenohoarder, aroace, omnimspec and sooooo many other identities. I'm Brazilian, so sorry for my bad english T-T. I am a university student, I have ROP, ADHD, synesthesia, hyperphantasia, hyperempathy, depression and social anxiety.
⛧~I make flags (occuden terms, desirdaes, Xenogenders,etc)
DNI
❆-Basic DNI (homophobes, racists...);
❆-Radqueers and xenosatanists;
❆-Pro/neu/complex contact for harmful paraphilias;
❆-Anti-xenogenders, anti-neopronouns, anti-mogai, anti-furries, anti-alterhumans, etc;
❆-TERFs, transmed and exclusionists;
❆-I'm currently shipcourse neutral, but I prefer darkshippers not to interact.
Thanks for reading ^v-v^
#intro post#introduction#blog intro#mogai blog#mogai#coining blog#xenogender blog#alterhuman blog#anti radqueer#anti rq#anti xenosatanist#rad inclus#alterhuman#otherkin#therian#alterhumanity#liomogai#transgender#transmasc#transandrogynous#aroace#xenogender#first post
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Tracklist:
Alli-Alligatoah • Ein Problem mit Alkohol • Hass • I Need A Face • Die grüne Regenrinne I • Beinebrechen • Füttern verboten • Meinungsfrei • Freie Liebe • Die grüne Regenrinne II • Terrorangst • So gut wie neu • Meine Hoe • Wo kann man das kaufen • Die grüne Regenrinne III • Wie Zuhause
Spotify ♪ YouTube
#hyltta-polls#polls#artist: alligatoah#language: german#decade: 2010s#Pop Rap#Rock#Conscious Hip Hop#Comedy Rap
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US soldiers examine a Fieseler Fi 103R Reichenberg, a manned version of the V-1 rocket (doodlebug) captured at Neu Tramm, Germany 1945
#world war two#1940s#worldwar2photos#history#ww2 history#ww2#wwii#world war 2#ww2history#wwii era#fieseler#v1#1945#Germany#neu tramm#rocket
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Seinfeld promo pic // What Would I Do?, Falsettos // Red, White & Royal Blue (2023) // Wikipedia article on Red thread of fate // Martian (2015) // The Flaming Lips, Do You Realize?? // Spider-man/Deadpool cover // Zhenya Katava & Neus Bermejo for V Magazine by Gus&Lo // Hannibal 3.06 "Dolce" script // Seinfeld promo pics // What Would I Do?, Falsettos // cottonbro studio on Pexels
#seinfeld#jerrykramer#web weaving#spideypool#rwrb#hannibal#hannigram#fate#red thread of fate#jerry seinfeld#cosmo kramer#mlm#falsettos#destined lovers#soulmates#the flaming lips#spider-man/deadpool#martian 2015#red white & royal blue#my stuff#I saw these promo pics and I've never been the same
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projmoon basil is the most traumatized basil goddamn
#[ out of character ]#[ about ]#[ muse: basileus ]#[ v: projmoon ]#(its deserved tbh so its ok)#(i would like to thank the popcorn machine squad too)#(especially neu for arby)
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#pluralpunk is a pro-endo tag. I noticed you use it in some of your posts when you're anti-endo. /neu
I could give less of a shit! Endos do not belong in plural spaces. I am plural, so I will use the tag. You can read back in my posts to see that! I use it purely out of spite. Plus, the tag was originally anti-endo until endos invaded it and we had to make a new tag. So I do not care!! ^^
-V💉

#did system#osdd system#endos dni#did alter#endos fuck off#osdd#osdd 1b#sysblr#traumagenic system#dissociative system#system#systempunk#system things#system stuff#plural system#syspunk#pluralpunk#plural community#actually plural#plurality#osddid#did osdd#osdd community#actually osdd#osdd alter#osdd plurality#traumagenic osdd#did#did stuff#traumagenic did
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Polle Says ... Vox Mocktail + Painkillers !
⟣ Requested by an anon. This was a very fun request, we really like Vox's aesthetics. Hope you enjoy. ⟢
Name
Vox , Axiom , Cassian , Cypher , Aitor , Mic , Emcee , Art , Aurelius , Auryn , Calihan , Finley , Fritz , Spark
Pronouns
he / him , hx / hxm , h3 / h1m , thxy / thxm , th3y / th3m , it / its , ix / ixs , x / x , pix / pixes , 0 / 1 , code / codes , spark / sparks , tech / techs , T / V , TV / TVs , film / films , screen / screens , mic / mics , 📺 / 📺s , 🎬 / 🎬s , 🦈 / 🦈s , ⚡ / ⚡s , 🔌 / 🔌s , 🎙️ / 🎙️s
Age
adult (30-40)
Species
humanoid , demon , objecthead (TV)
Gender
masc , neu , demiboy , paraboy , boyflux , agender
Attraction
pansexual , omnisexual , aromantic , aegosexual
Role
News Caster , Messenger Pigeon , Techie , Hyperfixation Keeper
Likes
sharks , aquariums , energy drinks
Dislikes
water , dressing fem , only having one sense stimulated (needs to have two (eg. audio and visual, tactile and scent, etc)
Interests
history , politics (mostly how they function) , pyschology
Personality (simple)
showy , charasmatic , cunning , snappy , witty , irritable
Moodboard
Typing Quirk
often refers to an audience , First Letter Capitalized , o -> 0 , i -> 1
#⟡ captain's orders !#⟡ “ we ain't touching the damn cargo ... ”#master ⚔️🪰 // she . they . se#bah pack#build an alter#create a headmate#bah blog#create an alter#fictive#introject#system stuff#pro endo#radqueer dni
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Ansichtskarte
Hohenbrück – Neu Schadow (Kr. Lübben) Freilichtbühne und Kiosk.
Reichenbach (Vogtl): BILD UND HEIMAT REICHENBACH (VOGTL) (V 11 50 A 1/B 92/78 01 06 09 122)
Foto: Bild und Heimat ([Heribert] Darr)
1978
#Hohenbrück Neu Schadow#Bezirk Cottbus#1970er#1978#Heribert Darr#Philokartie#DDRPhilokartie#Architekturphilokartie#akHohenbrückNeuSchadow#BezirkCottbus#AlltagskulturDerDDR#Ansichtskartenfotografie#AnsichtskartenfotografieDerDDR#deltiology#VintagePostcard
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Ich werde immer wieder gefragt, wie ich es schaffe mehr oder weniger kontinuierlich relative viele Worte pro Tag zu schreiben.
Eine Sache, die mir im Gespräch mit anderen Schreibenden aufgefallen ist, und die offenbar vielen Problem bereitet, sind Passagen oder Absätze, die einfach nicht gut klingen und sich auch durch mehrmaliges Umformulieren nicht besser anhören. Das ist nicht nur demotivierend, es bricht auch den Flow und frisst Zeit. Man kommt beim Schreiben nicht weiter und verbeißt sich in die selben 40 oder 50 Wörter, die einfach nicht passen, egal wie oft man sie dreht und wendet.
Sehr oft hilft es, den Teil einfach auszulassen und mit dem zweiten Absatz, sozusagen mitten in der Szene zu beginnen. Das funktioniert aber nicht immer. Manchmal ist der problematische Absatz eben nicht am Anfang eines Kapitels.
Und auch der Tipp, die fragliche Passage später zu schreiben, ist nicht immer von Erfolg gekrönt. Zu leicht landen die selben Wörter in ähnlicher Reihenfolge wieder auf dem Papier und klingen genauso sperrig und unbehofen wie zuvor.
Eine Methode, die mir eigentlich ganz gut gefällt, ist einen Schritt zurück zu machen, das, was man schreiben möchte, erst zu analysieren und dann aus einem anderen Winkel neu zu schreiben.
Das klingt alles so fürchterlich theoretisch, ist aber ganz leicht. Ich werde es daher an einem Beispiel demonstrieren:
Meine Szene:
Sebastian liegt im Krankenhaus.
Thorsten besucht ihn
Thorsten hat vorher Kleidung und andere Dinge aus Sebastians Wohnung besorgt und bringt sie ihm mit
Es ist schon später Nachmittag
Thorsten hat wenig geschlafen und sich nur von schwarzem Kaffee ernährt
Mein Absatz:
Die Sonne war schon dabei unterzugehen, als Thorsten den Krankenhausflur bis zu Sebastians Zimmer entlangmarschierte. Die Tür war geschlossen. Er streckte die Hand aus, um sie zu öffnen und versuchte den feinen Tremor zu ignorieren, der von zu wenig Schlaf und zu viel Kaffee zeugte.
Klingt scheiße.
Klingt auch nach zwei Mal Umformulieren scheiße.
Ich will aber nicht direkt im Krankenzimmer starten, denn dort geht es um Sebastian und den Fall. In meinem Kopf läuft Thorsten erst den Flur entlang. Der Leser soll während dieser Zeit, wo nur Thorsten da ist, sehen, wie es ihm geht.
Statt Thorsten durch den Flur marschieren zu lassen, stelle ich ihn eben direkt vor die Tür. Und plötzlich funktioniert es.
Thorsten atmete tief durch, bevor er an die Tür zu Sebastians Zimmer klopfte. Seine Hand zitterte leicht. Wie immer, wenn zu wenig Schlaf auf zu viel Kaffee traf. Ein wenig genervt davon, dass er den Tremor nicht unterdrücken konnte, öffnete er die Tür, ohne auf eine Antwort zu warten.
Dass es später Nachmittag ist und dass Thorsten eine Tasche mit Zeug für Sebastian dabei hat, kann ich dem Leser zu einem anderen Zeitpunkt immer noch verraten. Der Absatz funktioniert und ist deutlich flüssiger zu lesen als der erste.
Jetzt kann ich also weiterschreiben und habe mich nur ein paar Minuten mit dem einen Absatz herumgeschlagen, anstatt den ganzen Nachmittag damit zu vergeuden und am Ende des Tages nur ein paar unbefriedigende Sätze produziert zu haben.
In meinem Beispiel möchte ich aber schon zu Beginn die Stimmung der Szene vermitteln, deswegen schmücke ich den Absatz noch ein wenig aus:
Thorsten nickte dem Pfleger freundlich zu, der ihm am Krankenhausflur entgegenkam. Draußen ging gerade die Sonne unter. Bald würde das Personal geschäftig durch die Zimmer huschen, um das Abendessen auszuteilen. Es war doch später geworden, als er geplant hatte.
Dafür trug er jetzt in einer kleinen Sporttasche frische Klamotten für Sebastian und dessen Waschbeutel. Außerdem hatte er noch das Buch eingepackt, das er auf Sebastians Nachttisch gefunden hatte. Damit es ihm nicht langweilig wurde und er auf die Idee kam, sich selbst frühzeitig zu entlassen und auf dem Präsidium aufzutauchen.
Thorsten atmete tief durch, bevor er an die Tür zu Sebastians Zimmer klopfte. Seine Hand zitterte leicht, wie immer, wenn zu wenig Schlaf auf zu viel Kaffee traf. Ein wenig genervt davon, dass er den Tremor nicht unterdrücken konnte, öffnete er die Tür, ohne auf eine Antwort zu warten.
Das war jetzt viel Gebrabbel darüber, wie ich an so ein Problem herangehe. Wie machen das andere? Was habt ihr für Techniken, wenn ihr wo feststeckt?
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