#weekly words and grammar

[phagodyke]

the titration providers love sending me huge blocks of text right when I'm at my least capable of processing the written word

[merlinfromberlin]

I have once again done the thing where something I anticipated to have maybe 2k words somehow turned into 5k words.

[generation-of-vipers]

the decline of human creativity in the form of the uprise in AI generated writing is baffling to me. In my opinion, writing is one of the easiest art forms. You just have to learn a couple of very basic things (that are mostly taught in school, i.e; sentence structure and grammar amongst other things like comprehension and reading) and then expand upon that already-foundational knowledge. You can look up words for free— there’s resources upon resources for those who may not be able to afford books, whether physical or non physical. AI has never made art more accessible, it has only ever made production of art (whether it be sonically, visual, written—) cheap and nasty, and it’s taken away the most important thing about art (arguably)— the self expression and the humanity of art. Ai will never replace real artists, musicians, writers because the main point of music and drawing and poetry is to evoke human emotion. How is a robot meant to simulate that? It can’t. Robots don’t experience human emotions. They experience nothing. They’re only destroying our planet— the average 100-word chat-gpt response consumes 519 millilitres of water— that’s 2.1625 United States customary cups. Which, no, on the scale of one person, doesn’t seem like a lot. But according to OpenAI's chief operating officer , chatgpt has 400 million weekly users and plans on hitting 1 billion users by the end of this year (2025). If everyone of those 400 million people received a 100 word response from chat gpt, that would mean 800 MILLION (if not more) cups of water have gone to waste to cool down the delicate circulatory system that powers these ai machines. With the current climate crisis? That’s only going to impact our already fragile and heating-up earth.

but no one wants to talk about those stats. But it is the reality of the situation— A 1 MW data centre can and most likely uses up to 25.5 MILLION litres of water for annual cooling maintenance. Google alone with its data centre used over 21 BILLION litres of fresh water in 2022. God only knows how that number has likely risen. There are projections of predictions saying that 6.6 BILLION cubic meters could be being used up by AI centres by 2027.

not only is AI making you stupid, but it’s killing you and your planet. Be AI conscious and avoid it as much as humanly possible.

[sortagaysortahigh]

Nobody Gets Me | Joaquin Torres

A/N: Heyyyyy sexies...so don't be mad but I'm in my angst bag, this is giving Hurt/no comfort and I'm not sorry! I've been in my emo era so EVERYONE SHOULD SUFFER TOO!!! ugh anyways, i might do a pt 2 with a happy ending eventually, but I present: Divorced exes to something hopeful?? HURT!! WOOO HOO! Also, I did give Joaquin a sister for this universe specifically (hopefully i continue it </3) Everyone say thank you to @love-chx for beta-ing this and apologize to her for not having a happy ending <3

Summary: Getting married young had it's risks, unfortunately for you and Joaquin, that marriage didn't work out, it's been years since you've been in contact, so why do your hearts still ache?

Warnings: Hurt/no comfort NO HAPPY ENDING!, OOC joaquin (he's mean, jealous, exhausted fr), the Blip </3, john walker jump scare!, SAM BUCKY SUPREMACY!, heartbreak, angst, failed relationships, divorce, mentions of joaquin's accident, spelling and grammar errors (we all know who I am atp), a lot of crying, mentions of loss of virginity, mentions of sex (no smut/sex depicted). dual perspectives? switching b/w joaquin and reader??? idk im sorry if its all over the place

Word Count: 10.4k (of sadness)

Joaquin Torres x Fem!Reader (THEY'RE DIVORCED GOD DAMNIT! Reader also has long-ish hair/hair long enough to braid with 2 white stripes by her ears (this holds a future plot purpose </3)

Joaquin baby I'm so sorry for the angst i put you thru in this but maybe next time, do better! </3

Joaquin Torres is amazing at his job, he easily worked his way up in rank during his time in the Air Force, as a Lieutenant he met Sam Wilson, who he would eventually work very closely with and even consider family. It was a no-brainer when Joaquin had become a Captain, and while working side-by-side with Captain America, he was also able to take on the mantle of the Falcon.

He poured his all into his job, and from the outside looking in, he loved every second of every day. Joaquin was always positive, always putting on a happy face, always committed to making sure everything was going smoothly and that everyone was alright at all times. 

He truly was a hero in every sense of the word—at least to the public.

After his accident in the Indian Ocean near Celestial Island, he’d spent months in physical therapy and rehab, pushing himself past his limits, working harder and harder with the end-goal of getting back into the sky. 

It was accomplished after one year and three months.

One year of long days and even longer nights. A year and three months of being on the ground and being reminded of everything he’d swallowed down, all of the pain, all of the hurt, he did his best to ignore the ache and emptiness in his heart. But when he couldn’t drown himself in work and distract himself with the literal thrill of the skies, all of that bottled up emotion was bound to overflow.

That’s also around the time that he resorted to one night stands. He’d always hated one night stands, not because he didn’t enjoy the sex, but because sex without a genuine emotional connection was never enough for him. If anything, the random hookups had him spiralling even more.

His physical therapist had also told him several times that he shouldn’t have been partaking in any ‘strenuous activity’ which happened to include sex—or at least the kind of frustration fueled sex he was having.

She’d eventually referred him to an actual therapist, who he avoided like the plague, purposefully missing meetings every other week to force the therapist to schedule him bi-weekly. Opening up to a complete stranger was hard enough, but having to provide a co-pay to be questioned about his lackluster decision making and emotional trauma was a lot on him. 

Especially after the incident in the ocean.

The therapist had recommended he spend more time with his friends, which he did for a while, and it worked the first few months. Catching up with friends on and off base, but traveling back home to Miami was what had sent him into a downward spiral in the fourth month of his recovery.

Joaquin Torres has always been a family man, he spent his childhood telling his abuela about how excited he was to grow up one day, get a beautiful wife, and have his own little family. As a teenager, he admittedly did have two pregnancy scares with his then girlfriends, except each time he was fully committed to being a father, even at sixteen. 

He didn’t exactly love his exes, but he loved the idea of being a father, and he knew that one day, he would be. At seventeen Joaquin had only hoped he’d be married and not screwing anything on legs before having a kid.

The day he’d flown back to Miami he expected his sister to pick him up from the airport. It wasn’t a shock to see Ximena there, clearly on the phone with someone, however when he heard his ex-wife’s name slip past her lips, he was overcome with a sense of nausea that he hadn’t felt since the day in court when his divorce had been finalized.

Joaquin Torres hated telling people that he was divorced, being a divorcee at the age of twenty-nine wasn’t exactly the biggest green flag in the world. Nor was it something he was proud of. It’d been three years since the divorce was finalized, three years that he’d been drowning himself in work and a faux sense of positivity to ignore the rage and hurt he felt deep down.

She’d muttered a series of apologies for being there, stating that her husband couldn’t make it, before mumbling some excuse to Joaquin while simultaneously hanging up the phone.

He couldn’t be mad at his sister, not for having a best friend, even if that best friend was his ex-wife.

You and Ximena Torres met in the fourth grade, quickly bonding over a shared love of seashells. That bond quickly spiraled into running around the playground hand-in-hand while scaring the fifth grade boys—one of which being her older brother Joaquin.

The two of you hadn’t gotten along until your sophomore year of high school, when your then-boyfriend cheated on you and left you sobbing under the bleachers as if it was the end of the world. (To your fifteen year old self, it was the end of the world). Ximena was comforting you, and eventually, she managed to convince Joaquin and his friends to ‘go scare’ your ex-boyfriend and the group of guys he hung around with.

Joaquin was on the soccer team at that point, and he also knew several of the football players as they all did winter track and field together, so the fist fight that broke out two days later was a no-brainer.

The day you’d stormed into his house, quickly greeting his Abuela before rushing up to his room, slamming the door open and kicking his then-girlfriend out before cursing him out for thirty minutes while ranting about how ‘wildly wrong’ it was to ‘organize a fucking royal rumble’—your words not his—had marked the beginning of your friendship.

That friendship would later develop into something else when you complained about lacking a date to your senior prom. He’d been home from bootcamp and had a month before getting deployed overseas, so he simply shrugged and said he would take you.

Prom night Joaquin had taken your virginity, or rather, you’d given it to him on a silver platter.

From there, things just flowed naturally. He’d taken you on a few dates the month before deployment. During his first eight month deployment you’d written to him constantly, and those letters, plus photos, and occasional phone calls, gave him something to look forward to when he got back home.

He left for deployment in June, then came back in January of the following year. He was actually stationed in Florida, closer to Florida State University where you went to college. Although he hated FSU on the principle that he would always be a Miami fan, he had no issue in visiting you on campus. The both of you were casual for the latter half of your freshman year.

Then that summer he asked you to be his girlfriend, ‘in the official sense’—his exact words being ‘well, we’re always together, and I really like you, and you really like me, so will you be my girlfriend in the official sense because you’re already my non-official girlfriend’.

At that point he was twenty and you were around nineteen. The both of you dated consistently for two years before he proposed to you the week before Christmas on the beach. You’d obviously said yes, squealing in excitement as he slid the ring on your left finger.

The wedding happened four months later, it wasn’t anything major, something small on a private beach, but at the time, in 2016, it was the best day of both of your lives. 

The following two years were amazing, at least until the Blip happened and Thanos had managed to snap half of the universe’s population away. Joaquin was lucky that he and his wife hadn’t disappeared off of the face of the Earth. But life got harder much faster than expected.

Work was difficult, the sense of impending doom never really disappeared, not when dread was so common amongst global leaders. There were a few positives of the Blip—well, positives if you ignore the long lasting repercussions after the Avengers had reversed the Blip. Homelessness had found some sense of a ‘cure’, politicians using the available resources to make themselves look better, and to finally do something about the hundreds of thousands of people living on the streets and starving worldwide.

The first year of the Blip, things weren’t horrible. Not between you and Joaquin, or on a global scale. The sudden surge of resources did have some positive outcomes, however, the resources also led to a growth in greed. The greed led to a downward spiral on a global scale.

Sure, the global economy might’ve been great from a corporation-based standpoint, but day-to-day life for regular people wasn't.

Job hours got longer, the price of items did increase, inflation was actually an unpredicted issue for a lot of nations, then of course was the need to expand and grow militaries to account for the loss in actual soldiers and enlistments. That directly impacted you and Joaquin, to the point that you had to uproot your life in Florida and move to the West Coast.

Prior to the Blip, Joaquin had been deployed two additional times, one before you were married for six months, and a second for eight months the year after you’d gotten married. Both deployments were overseas, and each time he’d come home, he wouldn’t leave your side for days. 

Following the Blip, Joaquin was never home, or never at the house that you’d purchased off base in California. It wasn’t a bad house per-say, it just wasn’t home. It lacked any real warmth, and it felt like it was draining you. It was difficult to find work as a journalist and publicist, not because there wasn’t anything to be done, but because you freelanced, and during the Blip, major news outlets and magazines weren’t looking for freelance writers.

That also led you to working on base, which should’ve brought you and Joaquin closer together, but it did the exact opposite. Especially when he’d see other Lieutenants flirting with the ‘pretty new media relations’ girl, you usually smiled and laughed it off, doing your best to keep your job.

However, Joaquin Torres was the jealous type, and when you’d both get in fights at home about it, he’d constantly say that you were flirting, that you were feeding into it, as if you had asked for men to flirt with you during your day job.

His job was beyond stressful, which also led to him always being irritable, that combined with the grief that both of you were feeling over the loss of family and friends following the snap. 

You and him both were shells of who you once were before the Blip.

The blip had lasted five years, your marriage was over by the third. It wasn’t until the Blip was reversed that you’d both finished fighting one another in court.

Prior to that, you’d been sleeping in different rooms, and acted more like roommates that tolerated one another rather than husband and wife.

Once the divorce was finalized, Joaquin stayed in California while you went home to Miami. He hadn’t heard from you since, and he had no idea where you actually had been, considering you were never big on social media, and now it was like you were nothing but a ghost from his past.

He did his best to ignore the nausea in his stomach after hearing your name, it wasn’t just your first name, no it was your full name, as if you’d said something so outrageous that Ximena was yelling at you over the phone while laughing.

Joaquin knew you were still friends with his sister. He’d never hold that against you, but it did hurt.

During his time in Miami, he did his best to ignore his intrusive thoughts, telling him to call you, or to reach out to your family, or to figure out where the hell you’d actually gone, or who you were now. It’d been three years, three years since he’d seen you, three years since he’d heard your real actual voice, not just the recordings and videos on his phone and laptop.

With his skillset, he knew he could’ve found you, but you didn’t want to be found, that much was clear to him.

Whenever people would ask about you, he’d just laugh it off, shrug, and force a smile. He was so used to being positive all the time that he easily slipped into that persona, most people had never seen him irritated, and he liked it that way. 

Then he ran into your mother at the grocery store, she pulled him into a hug with a wide smile and started talking his ear off, asking how he was, congratulating him on becoming a ‘real superhero!’, then she’d gone on a tangent about you. That’s how he found out you were in Washington D.C. working directly under James Buchanan Barnes.

The same James Buchanan Barnes that Sam Wilson was best friends with, and the same person that he’d assisted in taking down the Flagsmashers. He’d seen Bucky several times over the past few years, and never, not once, did he see you.

So he knew you were avoiding him. It wasn’t just a weird sense of paranoia, no, Joaquin knew you. He knew you like the back of his hand, he knew the best parts of you and the worst, and he was absolutely positively sure that you’d been avoiding him.

He also knew that both Sam and Bucky most likely had no knowledge of you being his ex-wife, or even of Joaquin himself being married at one point. It was more likely than Bucky knew, mostly because getting the level of security clearances needed to work for a Congressman required several in-depth background checks.

Joaquin feigned happiness as your mother spoke to him, and as soon as he could, he got the hell out of there.

Slowly, but surely, his composure cracked. He wasn’t the happy-go-lucky guy anymore with nothing but optimism. The thread of pessimism within him was unraveling, and he found himself slipping into a never-ending anger.

He used that anger to push through the next few months of his recovery once he was back in Washington. He went on a strict diet, stuck to his training plans, and started pushing himself even more, striving to go back to being the Falcon, to find some sense of purpose, and something to drown himself in.

The only vice he truly had was the lackluster one night stands. It was never enjoyable, but he needed to let off some steam, so he’d go to some of the bars in D.C., flirt a little bit, and go back to someone’s place with them, slipping out in the early hours of the morning without a word. It worked for him, or at least, he told himself it worked for him. 

He also told himself he wasn’t going for women that reminded him of you—which was a definitive lie.

Eventually, once he was back in the sky, back running drills, back working on his flips, kicks, and spins he stopped with the unhealthy coping habits. He’d even gotten a new suit from the Wakandans, a gift from M’baku himself after Sam had told him about Joaquin’s accident. The suit was carbon black, had some green detailing, and it was constructed from vibranium, the same vibranium that absorbed kinetic energy and released it.

Joaquin had never felt more unstoppable with the mantle and new suit.

But with the whole ‘New Avengers’ fiasco occurring in New York, Sam had been stressed, and he’d been doing his best to work with Bucky, trying to find some kind of work-around to the ever-present legal issues associated with there being two Avengers groups.

When he got the call that they were headed to the renovated Avengers compound in Manhattan, part of him was excited to finally see the place, but the other part of him was dreading the possibility of seeing his ex-wife. He didn’t know if she still worked for Bucky, and he never bothered to ask, he hadn’t even brought it up again after speaking with your mother.

He was tense on the flight to New York, and when Sam tried to pry it out of him, he lied about having a stomach bug.

By the time that Joaquin and Sam had arrived at the tower, it was nearly seven and the sun was setting. Admittedly, the place was nice, a bit too modern for him, but nice either way. 

He followed Sam’s lead, mostly because he had no idea how to navigate the tower and getting lost wasn’t exactly something he wanted to do. But the second the elevator doors opened, he heard your laughter, a series of loud, high pitched, wheezy laughs and giggles that he’d fallen in love with a lifetime ago.

Sam’s brows knit together as he looked at Joaquin, then he looked around the elevator and into the large common space. “You alright kid?” 

Joaquin blinked a few times, nodding his head, snapping out of his daze as he looked at Sam. “Uh-uh yeah sorry, I just, zoned out—nothing to worry about. Anyways, where's Bucky?” he was talking too fast, the composure he’d worked so hard on building up easily crumbled. Then he heard your laugh again followed by ‘Wait! Stop—put me down Parker!’. 

He must’ve been on fire, that would explain the heat raging throughout his body.

Sam shrugged him off, motioning for Joaquin to follow him as he made his way towards the commotion, Bucky easily spotting them, standing from his front row seat to your ‘fight’ with Peter. 

Joaquin quickly followed, jaw clenched as he finally spotted you. You looked so different while also looking just like yourself. Your hair was longer now, pulled into two thick braids trailing from the top of your head, down your back. It also had two large white streaks near your ears, which was different—but then again, Joaquin had been shaving his face religiously because the thought of your compliments on it left a sour taste in his mouth.

He noticed the way you smiled, wide and full of life. A look he hadn’t seen in so long, a look he missed desperately, every single day.

When Peter Parker finally put you down, you laughed again, shaking your head as you sat up, still not noticing Joaquin’s presence. But Joaquin couldn’t keep his eyes off of you. It was clear that you’d been much happier and healthier, having put on some weight—but it wasn’t bad—the opposite really.

The last time he’d seen you, you were stressed, exhausted, and that reflected in your features and body. You’d never been super skinny, and he loved that about you—at one point he loved everything about you—but the years leading to your divorce, you’d dropped weight at an unhealthy pace from the long days and even longer nights. 

His eyes traced your entire figure from top to bottom, noticing the small things you’d changed as well. The few new tattoos and piercings stuck out to him, the small gold rings on both sides of your nostrils, and the alligator tattoo on your leg were very apparent. Joaquin also tried to ignore the faded Air Force t-shirt you had on, it was clearly his, and he remembered the shirt well.

Then you finally turned and noticed him. Eyes widening at the sight of Joaquin, and he kept his eyes on you the entire time.

Everyone seemed to notice the shift in the room, well everyone except for Sam and Bucky who were too busy talking amongst one another about a few legal documents, and Sam throwing in several of his typical ‘anti-government’ remarks.

It was as if time was frozen.

You blinked a few times, eyes on Joaquin—your Joaquin. 

The same man that you’d loved and hated at one point in your life, you weren’t even sure how you’d felt about him now, but you did know one thing, you had done your very best to avoid him at all costs. Sure, you knew one day it would probably bite you in the ass, but you hoped that was years from now.

Then again, you knew there was a risk when you’d taken the job as Bucky Barnes’s media relations secretary. This was your wheelhouse, you specialized in media relations and journalism, you would’ve been a complete idiot to decline the job.

But now, it was as if karma was coming to kick your ass.

You stared at him, unmoving as you processed seeing him again for the first time in almost four years. He looked different, more mature in a way that you hadn’t expected. He still had that boy-ish charm, but he looked older, stronger, and sturdier.

He still shaved his face, something you always told him to stop doing. Constantly telling him he looked good with facial hair, making sly comments and innuendos in public, giggling whenever he’d pull you into him, burying his face into your shoulder, covering any inch of exposed skin in gentle kisses as you laughed trying to shove him away.

But now he had a very visible burn scar along the right side of his neck, clearly stretching to his shoulder. You knew about his accident, and you’d been traveling with Bucky during that time, having sat in the waiting room while he spoke with Sam. 

Part of you wanted to see him, desperately, but you couldn’t do it.

Bucky had asked you several times, stating that he ‘just wanted to make sure’, but each time you politely declined, shaking your head.

The Joaquin you were seeing now wasn’t your Joaquin, not anymore at least.

You knew something was off about him, his eyes weren’t as bright anymore. Then again, neither were yours. Heartbreak and grief had the tendency to suck the joy out of things.

“You alright Lightning?” you blinked a few times, registering Peter’s voice, nodding your head as you finally glanced back at him, then after clearing your throat, you gave everyone an awkward smile before muttering some half-assed excuses and making a beeline out of the room, towards the other set of doors, far from Joaquin.

He watched you leave, scoffing while shaking his head.

Everyone made their introductions, but Joaquin didn’t have it in him to keep up his faux positivity, giving everyone tight lipped smiles and head nods. Mentioning his name and rank a few times, forcing a laugh when Sam made a joke about being the ‘Falcon’. When Peter tried to talk to him about the mechanics of the new Falcon suit, Joaquin brushed him off.

Sure you two weren’t together anymore, but he had every right to be jealous. Even if Joaquin was just your ex-husband. Peter had a nickname for you! That was enough to piss Joaquin off and make him dislike the kid.

When John Walker tried to question the entire interaction prior to the introductions, Bucky shushed him, giving him a pointed look which was received with a small head nod, and a loud sigh. Followed by Yelena elbowing him. 

It was clearly a touchy subject.

That night Joaquin couldn’t sleep.

Neither could you.

For the first time in years, you found yourself fishing your old phone and it’s charger out of the small lockbox below your bed, the box filled with some of your most prized mementos, photos of friends, family, birthday cards, small trinkets, a few necklaces, an old camera, the phone in hand, and most importantly, your engagement ring and wedding band.

It had taken a few minutes for the phone to turn on after connecting it to the charger. Then you sat on the floor, leaning against your bed in the darkness, eyes focused on the screen as you unlocked it—your old anniversary being the password.

Your bottom lip quivered as you opened the photos app, the most recent photo being of you and Joaquin at the zoo three months into the Blip, when you were still trying to find a sense of normalcy. Back when the both of you would still go on dates and try to cheer one another up, when you still fought the grief instead of wallowing in it.

He looked terrified while you had a wide smile on your face, three parrots on you, one perched in each hand and the other on the top of your head. 

Then you started scrolling, eyes burning with unshed tears as you went through the photos, happy moments forever frozen in time. Moments you wish you could relive, just for a day.

Finally you found it, the wedding video. You turned your phone horizontally, playing the ten minute video, a perfectly edited version of your wedding ceremony and reception, with a few blooper pieces of your family members giving their commentary on the wedding. Ximena put it together for you and Joaquin.

You looked so happy as he held you in his arms, both of you laughing and smiling, embracing the newly-weds title. 

The choked sob that slipped past your lips at the sight of your first dance unleashed the floodgates, you were full on sobbing now, watching the video with your knees to your chest, hand perched atop them. 

Joaquin used to look at you as if you hung the moon and stars. 

You remember that look, the look of unconditional love. 

You might’ve had a crush on Joaquin in high school, but he was the one who fell the hardest. He was the first to say ‘I love you’ and the day he proposed to you, he couldn’t stop himself, it was such a candid moment. He had a whole day planned for it, but then you two had gone to the beach, and the sunset painted you like an angel sent from above, the second you’d turn around, squatting to pick up seashells, he knew it was time.

He’d tapped your shoulder that day, as if he was showing you a shell, then you turned around—laughing at the awkward movement while still squatting, then you practically fell backwards onto the sand at the sight of him on one knee with an open engagement ring box.

Ximena had a thing for dramatics, so at the end of your wedding video, she also added in the video of your proposal, which was shakily taken from his phone, propped up against his water bottle in the sand, the angle a little crooked, but it captured the moment nonetheless. 

Three knocks on your door interrupted your sobbing sessions. You were quick to wipe your tears away, hoping you’d have enough time to tuck the phone away and climb into bed, pretending to be asleep.

But then Yelena opened the door with Bob at her side while you were trying to grab the box from below the bed, still on the floor. The two squinting into the darkness, letting their eyes adjust to the room with the helpful aid of the hall-way light streaming in.

Bob noticed you first.

“McQueen? Why’re you on the floor—wait, are you crying? Shit, Yelena she’s upset about something.” 

You laughed at him, shaking your head as you finally looked over at them, tear stained cheeks, red eyes, and a quivering bottom lip. Not to mention your frizzy hair, and tear soaked sweater sleeves.

They easily entered the room, Yelena turning on your desk lamp as Bob shut the door behind him. Then Yelena was sliding onto the floor beside you, and Bob in front of the both of you. 

The both of them were an oddly comforting duo, they were the best of friends, and honestly, after helping Bob start working through a lot of his issues, he had helpful input on most emotional situations. Plus, the fact that he cared was enough for you to let him in, and that went for Yelena as well.

Yelena noticed the phone, picking it up and looking at it, her brows knit together at the sight of the paused video, seeing a younger version of you in the arms of Joaquin Torres, smiles on your face while you flashed your wedding ring. Then she noticed that you were in a wedding dress, and he was in a full suit.

She squinted slightly, using two fingers to zoom into the paused video, eyes widening at the realization that the Air Force Captain she’d met today, was the same man in the video that you were very clearly marrying.

“We got married young. Like idiots. Then the Blip happened and I dunno, we just hated each other after a while, there wasn’t anything to fix. Then we went to court—spent almost a year going back and forth for the sake of arguing. Honestly, I only prolonged the divorce because fighting with him was better than not speaking to him.”

You sighed, now leaning your head on Yelena’s shoulder while the two listened and nodded.

“I don’t think it was idiotic to marry him if you loved him—did you?” 

You blinked a few times, glancing at Bob, then down at your hands again. “I do—I did. He used to make me feel like nothing could ever go wrong. Then suddenly, the fantasy all came crashing down.” You sniffled a few times, shrugging.

He nodded, looking at Yelena who was swiping through the different photos and videos, then her eyes widened as she let out a loud gasp, throwing the phone to the side, where it now sat face-up, a video of you and Joaquin in a very intimate position on the screen.

Your eyes widened as you rushed to flip the phone. It wasn’t like a full blown sex tape, but you were half-naked on top of him.

“So I take it you had a healthy marriage at first? Based on that-” Yelena pointed to the phone. Then she finally broke, loud boisterous laughter filling the room. Her laugh was always contagious, and it led to the three of you laughing amongst each other.

They’d managed to cheer you up in minutes, and that reminded you of how lonely you’d felt before meeting them. How mundane life felt, how every single task was draining. It reminded you of how draining life really used to be, when you’d always feel so alone in a room full of people.

When you’d seek comfort in the one person that couldn’t provide it anymore. 

“I really do love you guys.” 

Yelena smiled, nodding her head. “I love you too, in a completely platonic way, don’t try to mount me the way you mounted him—wait what's his name again?” Her brows knit together as she thought hard to remember Joaquin’s name, but she was drawing a blank.

Bob finally stopped laughing, shaking his head. “Joaquin—I think? Yeah, that sounds right.” 

You nodded. “Yeah, it’s Joaquin, Captain Joaquin Torres. Y’know when we were married he wasn’t a captain yet—” you stopped mid sentence, afraid of the potential word vomit or tears that might come out of this conversation.

On the opposite end of the tower Joaquin was pacing back and forth in one of the guest bedrooms. Not only was he angry, he was hurt, so hurt, in fact, that he’d spent thirty minutes crying silently in the shower, hoping the scalding hot water would numb some of the pain he was feeling.

It usually worked for physical pain, but emotional pain? It did little to nothing.

Seeing you was like opening Pandora's box. Joaquin always knew he was angry, angry at you yes, but he was angrier at himself. He’d never really forgiven himself for letting you slip through the cracks, for taking his frustrations out on you, for being overly jealous and never understanding, and for pushing you away. Constantly.

The Blip had taken a lot out of him, he was hurting, but so were you.

He forgot about that, about the pain that you’d been in. 

Your mother was blipped, and she meant the world to you. Anytime you’d call your father, you’d lock yourself in the bedroom after, sobbing for hours, holding a pillow against your chest, trying to find some kind of comfort. 

In the beginning, he’d slip into bed behind you, arms wrapped around your torso while you silently cried and mourned your mother. You were never really the blind hope type—he was. Joaquin had been there for you, there to comfort you, to bring you a sense of reassurance, and most importantly, to ground you.

His abuela had been blipped, he knew how it felt, the grief, but it wasn’t nearly as substantial as yours was. He loved his abuela, but he also knew she was an older woman who lived an entire life, and anytime they spoke, she’d always say ‘I love you Quino, if this is the last time we talk, just know i’ll always be there in spirit! Make sure you tell my princessa I love her too!’—or something along those lines.

He used to tell her not to talk like that, but his mother said it came from a place of love and of understanding. Every moment with someone was precious and needed to be valued, life was really too short to leave things unspoken.

So how he managed to leave so much? He didn’t understand. 

He blamed himself for the divorce, Joaquin knew that he was pushing you away. Then you’d gotten that job on base, and at first he was excited to visit his pretty wife during lunch. But then his jealousy took over, jealousy mixed with pessimism and all of the negative emotions he’d been swallowing down started surfacing.

It wasn’t like you didn’t try. You were constantly talking to him, constantly checking on him, spending nights with your hands in his hair while you asked if he was alright, telling him you were always there to talk. 

His job was stressing him out, he was under so much pressure, constantly. Tensions were rising at work, there were deadlines that needed to be met, tasks he didn’t have the time to do, and yet he still had to.

So he’d come home late, and he was bitter about it. Then you’d show up with a small smile on your tired face, mumbling something about making dinner, but he was tired, too tired to eat. He just wanted to sleep.

Some days he’d snap at you, and you were never one to sit and take it. 

That’s when the fighting would start, and the screaming for hours on end. You two would go back and forth until eventually you’d slam a door in his face and tell him to sleep on the sofa. 

Even now, as he paced back and forth, he remembers the sound of your muffled sobs, the way you’d cry after every fight. Then you’d pad out of the room in the middle of the night with a blanket for him, he’d pretend to be asleep as you covered him, kissing the top of his head, mumbling a rushed ‘I’m sorry’. 

You always cared, you did your best. 

He didn’t. 

He stopped trying, and he knew that. He was just so tired, so angry, so jealous, so frustrated. The world didn’t stop spinning, tomorrow would always come, but he was so angry as he focused on each individual day, then he couldn’t find comfort in you anymore.

At one point, you were able to calm him down within seconds, you’d wrap your arms around him and tell him you loved him, then ask to talk. He’d melt against you, an entire breakdown of his day would follow. Sometimes you’d comment, other times you’d nod your head while he spoke.

But eventually, the hugs, kisses, and gentle gestures stopped. Even the sex didn’t solve anything. It was just another way for the both of you to let go of tension, then he was grabbing a pillow and leaving the room, going to the sofa, and eventually, to the guest bedroom that had turned into his personal bedroom.

What made things worse was that you were both so young when you’d gotten married, young and naive. In a world where alien invasions were common, jumping the gun on marriage wasn’t that irrational, not  when you were truly in love with someone.

But sometimes love isn’t enough. 

That’s what had truly broken Joaquin, the realization that love wasn’t enough. 

Joaquin was twenty-six when the divorce was finalized, you were twenty-five. 

When he was twenty-two people told him it was idiotic to get married that young, that it was a mistake. So many people doubted you and Joaquin’s marriage, and now, he had to admit that they were right. 

He wanted to hate you, the last year of your marriage was the hardest. It was as if neither of you wanted to let go while simultaneously making one another’s lives a living hell. Buying a house together made it much harder to separate from one another, which also presented its own legal issues in terms of needing to be separated prior to divorcing one another.

Then there was the fact that you’d been married in Florida, seeking a divorce in California, while Joaquin was actively in the Air Force, and you also worked on base. It wasn’t like either of you would’ve been able to avoid one another, and truthfully, neither of you wanted to avoid each other.

The arguments and fights were never ending during that last month. Anytime he’d see you or you’d see him before a meeting with your attorneys, a screaming fest would start. Most of the fights had nothing to do with any divisions of assets, and you’d both already agreed to sell the house.

But Joaquin knew that he preferred fighting with you over never speaking to you.

The sound of his door slamming open caught his attention, his pacing stopped while he turned to look at the door. 

Sam stood here with Bucky by his side, a singular brow raised as he shook his head, the two men inviting themselves into the room.

“So you mean to tell me, this entire time, you had an ex-wife? Kid, you were married?” Sam was loud as he spoke, shock evident in his tone as he entered the rooms, hands moving as he spoke. “I had to find out from Buck! Of all people!”

“Hey—what’s that supposed to mean!” Bucky sounded offended while he leaned against the door, arms crossed in front of his chest, shaking his head at Sam’s comment.

“It means, I’ve been working with the kid for almost four years—wait! When we first met, you’d barely been divorced? Is that why you were in Tunisia?! On some finding yourself through work journey?” 

Joaquin was frozen in place, eyes wide as he looked from Sam to Bucky, then back to Sam. He didn’t know the best way to approach this situation. Sure, he knew that eventually he would’ve had to come clean to Sam about you, but that wasn’t ever a priority of his, mainly because he preferred to act as if nothing was ever wrong and swallow all of his feelings down.

“Yeah, when you introduced me to the kid, they’d only been divorced for around four months? I found that out from McQueen. Honestly, I’m surprised Joaquin held it in for so long, five drinks in and she was crying on my living room sofa.”

Bucky sounded so nonchalant as he spoke, which only irritated Joaquin. It made sense that you’d be spending time with him, he was your boss. But, you? Drinking with him? Then spending time at his place? 

Joaquin’s jaw was clenched so tight he was afraid his teeth would crack.

“Buck, why were you drinking with her—you don’t drink often.” Sam paused, looking over at Bucky. 

“I wasn’t drinking, we were at a fundraiser, y’know they’re boring as hell. People kept passing her drinks, she didn’t want to be rude when she was technically working, I told her to just chuck the drinks into some plants—then she started rambling about plants and their root health. Anyways, long story short, she’s an emotional drunk.”

Joaquin stifled a laugh, a sad smile on his face at the story. 

You’d always been an emotional drunk, even as a teenager when you and Ximena would sneak into his mother’s liquor cabinet, sneaking out to drink in random parking lots or at the beach. Then someone would inevitably call him to pick you both up, he’d always feign reluctance, but he never had an issue getting the two of you, and whatever other friend was there.

That’s also one of the first times you’d kissed him. He remembers the day as if it was yesterday, you were a junior in high school, he was a senior, it was after the big homecoming game. You were clearly plastered, laughing and shrugging with Ximena, both of you practically falling over with wide smiles on your faces as you stumbled into Joaquin in the parking lot.

He lectured you both that night, Ximena had fallen asleep in the front seat, so you opted to help haul her out of the car with him, giggling as you backed into him a few times. Joaquin kept shushing you, and after you both managed to get his sister into the house, you smiled at him in the dimly lit hallway.

Then you kissed him. It was quick, as if the moment you realized your lips were on his, you were immediately reeling back. Apologizing while giggling, then you’d gone into Ximena’s room, waving at him before closing the door.

“Hey stop daydreaming over there! You’ve got some serious explaining to do!” Sam’s snapping caught Joaquin’s attention as he slowly nodded his head, acting as if he was listening—he very clearly was not.

“Start from the beginning, let’s hear it.”

Joaquin nodded at Bucky, letting out a deep sigh as he sat on the edge of his bed.

He’d spent the next two hours explaining everything to them both, from the start of your relationship, to getting engaged, then to the Blip, and of course, the end of it all. The divorce, the fights, the anger, all of it.

In a way, Joaquin felt like a weight was lifted off of his shoulders. He’d spent so long bottling everything up that it had just become normal to him. 

“So you’re still in love with her and from what Bucky’s told me—she’s still in love with you. So what’s the issue here? Clearly you’ve both grown up, and Ray Charles once said, time heals a broken heart but time has clearly sat still while you two have been apart—”

Bucky cut him off, “I don’t think that’s how that saying goes, Sam.”

“You shut the hell up, I’m giving the kid some emotional motivation to win his woman back! Sure, they’re divorced, but they’re young and clearly stupid!—no offense Joaquin. It’s been years since they’ve seen each other! You’ve heard her side, Buck, now we’ve heard his! They’re in love!” Sam’s hands moved rapidly as he spoke, constantly motioning in Joaquin’s direction and the opposite direction, most likely where you metaphorically would be.

Bucky sighed, shrugging. “Okay, you’re right—” he turned to look at Joaquin. “I get you two went through a rough patch during the Blip, but I can guarantee, things’ll be better now. At the very least, you should try. Lightning McQueen’s not gonna reject you outright.” 

Sam and Joaquin shared a confused look before Sam spoke up. “Why the hell is everyone calling her Lightning McQueen?”

Bucky shrugged. “She wears Lightning McQueen slippers around the tower, sometimes she’ll stop mid sentence and say ‘kachow’. At first I didn’t get it, then she forced me to watch the entire Cars franchise with her. She cried during the last two movies.”

Sam blinked a few times, meanwhile Joaquin couldn’t hold his laughter in.

“That’s one of her favorite movies, something about a coming of age story—I dunno, she’s loved it forever.” 

Sam and Bucky looked at one another, then back at him, speaking at the same time, the mixture of “you’re both idiots” and “idiots in love” sounded a bit jumbled and confusing, but Joaquin got the point.

The next few days Joaquin’s only goal was to actually talk to you. It was easy in theory, there were only so many places that you could run off to. However, you knew the compound much better than he did, and anytime he finally caught sight of you, you were gone in seconds.

It was obvious you’d been avoiding him, and that was only irritating him more and more. He’d gone from being slightly hopeful that maybe you two could start over, to feeling himself slipping into that same pessimistic mindset he’d tried to swallow down and drown out with work.

He was hanging on by a thin thread. 

That thread snapped the moment he walked into the lab in search of some data on a few samples of adamantium that was recovered near a small island neighboring the Celestial mass in the Indian Ocean. 

He still had a job to do, even if he was also simultaneously trying to win his ex-wife back.

The moment Joaquin stepped foot into the lab, you were there, standing beside a large metal table where Bob was laying flat. Not only was the man laying down, he was fully shirtless and your hands were on his abdomen. From Joaquin’s angle he couldn’t see what you were doing, but he did hear your laughter.

Yelena leaned against one of the tables behind you, her arms crossed as she questioned your motions, pointing down at Bob where you’d been stitching him up, “If you go any slower, it’ll prolong the pain.”

You scoffed, glancing at her over your shoulder. “Well, if you hadn’t been sparring with knives, none of us would be here right now. This is the closest thing we have to a med bay, besides, if I go faster, I’ll fuck up the stiching and unfortunately for you, you don’t exactly have health insurance in the state of New York. Actually, I don’t think any of you do outside of Bucky and Walker.”

Bob winced slightly as you pulled the thread through his skin, teeth clenched, one hand over his eyes. “Why couldn’t I have a drink or something again? No offense Lightning, but this hurts.”

You sighed. “Remember your whole addictive personality thing? Sorry, but the best I can do is get Yelena to knock you out cold. But I think that would be another issue. Besides, aren't you supposed to be like a God or something? You’ll heal just fine! Don’t be such a baby!” Then you started laughing.

He groaned, wincing as he laughed as well, which made Yelena laugh too.

Joaquin finally walked into the lab, jaw clenched as he walked right past the three of you, his own metaphorical storm cloud following him. Except this time, you couldn’t run away from him, which he was grateful for, but he didn’t really feel like discussing your past relationship with people he hardly knew.

“Good afternoon to you too, Captain Torres!” Your eyes widened at Yelena’s words, fingers pressing a bit too harshly into Bob’s skin—earning a loud groan.

Joaquin scoffed, nodding his head to acknowledge Yelena while mumbling. “Yeah—afternoon.” 

He found a more secluded area of the lab, but it still had a direct line-of-sight to you. So Joaquin sat, stewing in his own jealousy for thirty minutes while you stitched up some gash on Bob's side.

Then Yelena was helping Bob get back up, stating that she’d be back shortly, but once she was out of the lab, the lights dimmed, then flashed red for a few seconds, before settling on a blue-ish hue. That was followed by Yelena’s voice over the intercom. “Sorry Lightning! But you two need to talk it out, or sex it out, whichever you prefer! I’ll shut down the cameras! Oh and don’t try to do any other work, Peter’s shutting down the systems externally.” 

Once she finished speaking, you were left in a tense silence as you cleaned up the area. The sounds of metal clinking, plastic shifting, spraying from the disinfectants, and the sounds of your frustrated sighing practically echoed in the room.

“Are you gonna say something to me? Or just be angry and clean the whole time. Not that I’m not used to that.” 

You blinked a few times, pausing your motions before practically slamming the metal tray in your hands against the countertop as you slowly turned to face him. He was still several feet away, but now Joaquin was standing up, leaning against one of the larger free-standing countertops that you typically examined samples on.

“I have nothing to say to you Joaquin.”

He shook his head at that. “Well, I have everything to say to you Ms. Torres.” He noticed the way your eyes widened as he shook his head, then he ran his tongue along his top teeth. “Y’know what’s absolutely insane, that I had to find out from Bucky—your boss—that you hadn’t ever gone through with changing your name. So you’ve been walking around with my last name, while fucking whoever the hell you want.”

You scoffed at that, there it was, the jealousy. “Excuse me? I’m sorry that I didn’t feel the need to go through another extensive legal process to change my goddamn name, when I already made a name for myself with the last name Torres. And seriously? Fucking whoever I want? I’ve gone on dates—I’ve had sex with other people. Oh well! Do you want flowers and a fuckin handwritten apology? Like oh I’m so sorry Joaquin that I kept your last name after being married to you for five years! My bad!”

Joaquin let out a sardonic laugh, followed by a scoff before speaking again. “Well, if you hadn’t disappeared off of the face of the earth, maybe I wouldn’t care that much. It’s like the second we were over, you were gone!” 

“What the hell was I supposed to do?! Stick around? Fight with you some more?! As if it was ever fucking enjoyable? I choose to leave, I’m not mad about it! I had to get the hell away from you, I had to remember who the hell I was—who I am! I didn’t even know who I was outside of being with you! So sorry if I choose to put myself first and go live my life Joaquin!” 

Your voice got louder and louder as you spoke, chest rapidly rising and falling, feeling the waves of irritation and anger rolling through your entire body.

He shook his head. “Did you ever think that maybe—just maybe I didn’t want the divorce. That sure we could’ve used some space and time apart but that I still loved you?! Did you ever consider that! Or maybe I still love you! That I was never able to move on?!”

You paused, lips slightly parted, brows knit together at the confession.

Joaquin scoffed, rolling his eyes, leaning his head back slightly as he looked up, silently praying to whatever God truly existed, that this wasn’t a mistake. Then his eyes were back on you.

“There hasn’t been a single day that I haven’t thought about you. Every single worthless hookup I had, I thought about you, I purposefully went after women that reminded me of you just so I could fucking feel something—anything! But they were never you!” 

He ran his hands through his hair. “I swallowed down every shitty emotion I’ve felt for years, drowning myself in even more work, I mean I guess it paid off-or at least it had paid off until I fucking crash landed into the Indian Ocean!”

Joaquin laughed again, sniffling slightly, doing his best to ignore the burning in his eyes “The worst part was, when I woke up from a week long coma, I was delirious and high on whatever the fuck they were giving me for the pain—and I asked for you. I asked every single nurse for you. I get it, you wanted to go off and live your life without me—but you didn’t call, you didn’t text. Hell, I even asked Ximena if you knew and she avoided the subject.” 

You cut him off. “Shut the hell up Joaquin.”

He shook his head “No, I’m tired of holding this shit in, and if this is the only chance I’ll ever get to talk to you—then so be it! I waited for you, I waited in that goddamn hospital hoping and praying that maybe you’d show up with your sad smile and concerned eyes and tell me that I was an idiot and things would all be okay. But you didn’t, come to find out, you were there that day—the day they rushed me in.” 

You shook your head, jaw clenched, eyes watering. “Joaquin, stop.” 

Joaquin laughed again, shrugging. “Bucky told me you were there with him, that you hounded all of the nurses and the receptionists, but you never once went to see me. What? Hate me that bad you couldn’t even spare me five fucking minutes when I’m unconscious after nearly dying?!—” 

“Jesus Christ! Shut the fuck up, Joaquin! You don’t know what you’re talking about. For once in your life, shut your big fucking mouth! I’m sorry I didn’t go—you think I didn’t wanna see you?! I was fucking terrified! Terrified that you were gonna die on that table when they were operating on you! I was sobbing the entire time, I was so afraid of losing you—” 

You wiped your tears away, brows knit together, bottom lip quivering as you stared at him. “I’d already lost you once. I didn’t have it in me to lose you again. I couldn’t see you like that, I tried—I wanted to. I couldn’t do it. You don’t get to hold that against me—” 

You pointed at him as you spoke. “You don’t have the fucking right to hold that against me.”

Joaquin blinked a few times, watching as your walls were crumbling. He knew you were still hurt, that much was obvious in the way you’d been avoiding him—but to know you were hurting like this? 

It broke part of him, and for a second he felt like his nineteen year old self again on the night he’d taken your virginity. He remembered the way you tried not to cry, word vomiting your insecurities and vulnerabilities to him while the two of you sat in his childhood bedroom. Joaquin remembered the way you looked, the way you couldn’t meet his stare, the way you held the blanket to your body to shield yourself from him, even if you were still in your dress.

He knew you so well, he used to know exactly how to comfort you, exactly how to make your worries disappear.

Now he didn’t.

Now he was the cause of them.

“I loved you until the very end of our relationship. Don’t ever sit and act like I didn’t—like I don’t care about you. Joaquin, you were my first love, you meant everything to me. I married you when I was twenty-one like an idiot because I had so much faith and hope in our relationship—in our love. I know I was wrong to up and leave once the divorce was finalized, but I didn’t want to work through things just to be your friend. I could never in my life be your friend Joaquin—not when you knew everything about me—every single insecurity, every hope, every dream.”

You weren’t wiping the tears away anymore, a sad smile on your face as you looked down at your hands, then back to him. 

“If I could do it all over again, I would. Just to get the chance to love you like that again. That’s why I left, because I knew if I stayed, I would’ve been right back with you—right back to wanting to hate you, knowing I never could and I couldn’t take it.”

He was at a loss for words, tears finally flowing along his cheeks while he looked at you. Joaquin finally processed how he’d broken your heart—broken you. He’d broken you down time and time again, letting his own insecurities, exhaustion, and pessimism get to him. 

He’d hurt the one person he never wanted to hurt—you.

“Everyday I think about you. I think about how you’re doing, I wonder what Sam’s got you wrapped up in, I laugh at the stupid jokes you make during press releases and media statements as the Falcon. Hell, I even pray for you, which is crazy because I don’t even know if there’s even a higher power—but the faith that you’ll be okay each and every day is enough for me. I ask Ximena about you all the time. Whenever I go back to Miami, I make sure to go see your family.”

Joaquin was genuinely speechless. This entire time, he thought you just didn’t care. That you wanted as much distance between the both of you as possible. He’d been so angry for years, angry at you, and angrier at himself.

“I don’t think I’ll ever not love you Joaquin, and that in itself, is enough to make me avoid you. I don’t want what we had, I hated it. I hated every fight, I hated watching you leave after we had sex, I hated the sight of you sleeping on our sofa. I hated all of it. I know life was really hard at that point, I know I wasn’t the best wife or partner, but I tried. I tried everyday but you held everything against me, constantly.”

You sniffled, biting your bottom lip while trying to recollect yourself. The tears were flowing, and you couldn’t stop them.

“You were so mean, all the time. You weren’t the Joaquin I had fallen in love with, honestly, I know I was a shell of myself, but you—you were so much worse. You never let me back in—” a short sob slipped past your lips while you cried, looking down at the ground, taking a few deep breaths. “I wanted you to let me in again. I remember purposefully forgetting documents and prolonging our entire attorney experience, just so I could spend more time with you. Because I knew the second it was over, I was leaving.”

The silence was suffocating.

You were doing your best not to sob. Joaquin was processing everything—he’d never truly known how it all affected you. He’d never seen you sob at night, sure he knew you cried, but he didn’t see it, he didn’t notice how broken you truly were.

“I’m sorry.” Joaquin spoke softly “I’m so sorry—baby—I didn’t know. I just—I didn’t realize how bad things were until it was all over. And I was just so angry all the time, everything made me so mad. Then I’d see you, but everyone was always gravitating towards you, and it makes sense because you’re beautiful, funny and so intelligent, but it bothered me.”

He paused, now stepping closer to you, hesitating before gently caressing your face, angling it towards him, away from the ground. His thumbs softly wiping your tears away.

“I was so insecure and jealous and downright mean, and I’m sorry for putting you through hell. You meant the world to me—hell you still mean the world to me. I’ve been so angry this whole time, I thought I was mad at you, but I was mad at me. Mad that I’d fucked up so bad, mad that things hadn’t worked out, that I stopped trying.”

You leaned into his hand, teary eyes now looking into his.

“I’ve never stopped loving you. I want you to know that, even if nothing comes from it. I’ll always love you, there’s nobody in this universe that gets me the way you do, I know it’s been years, but I don’t think I’m ready to just let you go again.”

Joaquin’s vulnerability shocked you, not because you didn’t think he was capable, but because this Joaquin, this was your Joaquin. This is the man that you’d fallen in love with.

“I never wanted you to let me go, Joaquin.” 

He’d been the one to suggest the divorce, and it had taken a few months of fights before you’d actually considered it. 

By that point, Joaquin was rarely sleeping with you, and the only time the two of you weren’t fighting was when you were both on base at work. Outside of that, the fights and arguments were constant, an unrelenting cycle, and you had finally hit your breaking point.

The last major fight before the divorce ended in you screaming at him before tossing a large yellow envelope on the kitchen island.

You both signed the papers that night. Then the filing process started.

That night you cried into the stuffed bear that he’d won for you at a carnival when you were nineteen. It was one of your first real dates, and you’d been so excited when he’d managed to actually win the ring toss three times in a row, scoring the large panda bear, giving it to you with a dopey smile on his face.

“Please—give me a second chance, I’ll do everything right this time—I won’t fall back into old shitty habits—I promise baby” his voice was strained as he tried not to cry. It took everything in him to not fall to his knees to beg for you back.

You sighed, pulling away from him as you shook your head.

“Joaquin, I think time apart might’ve been what we needed. But I still see the way you look at people around me, I still see the same shitty habits, and honestly, I think we might be better apart for now. We both have stuff to work through, but I won’t up and disappear from your life again”

He nodded as you spoke, biting his bottom lip, watching as you shrugged, sadness pooling in your teary eyes.

“I can’t be your wife again—not now at least. But maybe one day when we’re in a better spot.”

Joaquin sniffled a bit, looking up at the roof, then back at you. “One day for sure.” 

Then you kissed him, it was soft, hesitant, but he knew it wasn’t a welcoming kiss. It was similar to the last kiss you’d given him the day your divorce finalized. As if you were saying goodbye again.

Joaquin only hoped that the goodbye would be temporary.

-

Thanks for reading my lovers <3 as always feedback is appreciated!!!

[choerypetal]

The Tattoo / Homelander

summary: Both Homelander and you had been searching for your soulmate for years. Then, when you began working at Vought, a mysterious tattoo appeared on your arm, one that matched Homelander's a little too perfectly.

request was from; @chocolate-floof hope you enjoy this short fic!

ps: english isn't my first language so i apologize for any grammar errors xx

Homelander had always been a man of tradition, whether in a romance or friendship settings. He never shied away from both showing the most predictable affections, to pleasing his country. Even when his mind always managed to disassociate from reality, he couldn’t deny the truth that unfolded beneath him, etched into his very flesh: the beginning of knowing your existence.

Meeting Homelander was daunting at first. Luckily, you managed to escape his attention when two Vought employees needed you to prepare Firecracker’s weekly news replacement. Yet, his soft smile and lingering gaze made him realize how magnificent you were to him.

Being a the traditional wife was not what he wanted, even if his values where far from different by the rest of the citizens, there was no surprise he wanted to cherish you differently. In fact, Homelander prided himself on his efficiency that he didn’t need a wife or nanny to subdue his cravings, especially with the opportunity of being with you. He needed someone whom he could be himself, and being the Homelander that he was, naturally his first reasons was for safety measures. And it was from the very first meeting at the Seven, that John’s thoughts were obviously focus in making you as his as fast as possible.

At first, Homelander didn’t think much about pleasing you. During the Vought meetings, he would casually brought you coffee, enough to make Deep and others gasp at this rare act of kindness. He didn’t hesitate to glare threateningly at anyone who dared to comment. You, oblivious to this, made it more delightful for John to watch over you.

The coffee ritual was one thing; sneaking into your office was another. Then came your perfume, the scent that enchanted him whenever you were in the same room. He would lean close while discussing matters with guests or politicians, praising your talent and major contributions to the Seven. His words often brought a light blush to your cheeks, a reaction he cherished.

One night, as you greeted everyone with delicate grace, Homelander saw you as a rare delicacy. His whispered compliment, “You look ravishing tonight,” near your ear, made your hair flinch and confirmed that you too had feelings for him, even if you were too shy to show them. This pleased Homelander immensely.

A few days later, Homelander noticed it as well—the mark on his arm that had appeared since the very first day you arrived. Despite this, he never believed in soulmates or love at first sight, especially for someone like him. Yet, it took enough courage for him to 'accidentally' bump into you one day, knowing you were busier this week. It meant a little more time for him to determine if he was going insane, but his doubts were replaced with confidence.

One day, during a rush, you stumbled into him, covered in sweat and breathless. His arms almost hovered over you as he chuckled, “My, my, Y/N. What’s the rush?” Brushing a few strands of hair from your face, he noticed your oversized blouse slipping down to reveal a tattoo in cursive, saying “Love.” He murmured the word to himself, meeting your gaze as your cheeks turned a bold shade of pink.

“Love…” he murmured again, then scoffed nonchalantly, pushing back his suit’s arm to reveal a matching tattoo that read “You.” “If we bring your arm to mine, I’d say the universe is telling us something.”

Indeed, the universe had brought you together. Though initially, you thought the tattoo was a drunken mistake, you realized its significance when you saw Homelander’s matching mark. He was your soulmate, and you were his. The mark on his wrist was no coincidence, and you both knew it.

Lost in thought, his voice caught you off guard, soft and captivating. As he approached, his shadow hovered over you, his thumb gently caressing your bottom lip as he lifted your chin to meet his gaze. His piercing, loving gaze conveyed everything without words. You nodded slightly, making him chuckle. “You are mine,” he said, his voice hoarser than before. Leaning in, he closed the gap between you, his lips brushing yours before he asked, “May I?” You nodded again, and his lips curved into a smile as he kissed you deeply. His hands cupped your face, and he growled softly, “So delectable,” before leaning in once more, barely leaving any space for air.

From that day on, the two of you became inseparable.

[kinkyniragi]

Until the debt is paid - Chapter 1: Taken

Pairing: Thomas Shelby x Reader

Genre: Smut 18+

Word count: 1,4k

Summary: As payment for your father’s debt, you’ve been handed over to Thomas Shelby—a ruthless criminal with a reputation as dangerous as his smirk. Any hope for a swift resolution crumbles, leaving you entirely at his mercy. A hostage. A pawn in a game whose rules only he knows.

CN: Physical violence, power play, humiliation

Author’s note: After writing a lot of smut for Niragi from Alice in Borderland, I’m now diving into the world of Cillian Murphy. Feel free to leave comments and share my story if you enjoy it—I truly appreciate every bit of motivation to keep writing. Also, I’m not a native speaker, so if you spot any creative grammar choices… let’s just call them artistic liberties, eh?

***

When you meet him, his hands are in his pockets, his cigarette smoldering between his lips, and his eyes – sharp and assessing – never leave yours. A slow, knowing grin spreads across his face, a silent promise that whatever nightmare you’ve imagined is nowhere near the reality you’re about to experience.

***

Hours earlier

They came for you in the dead of night.

You barely had time to stir before rough hands seized you, a gag muffling your protests as a sack was yanked over your head. No matter how hard you fought, the struggle was over before it began. No surprise there—you were dealing with seasoned criminals. Kidnapping was probably just another item on their weekly agenda.

The journey was long, disorienting. The wheels of the carriage jolted over uneven cobblestones before the road gave way to rugged country paths. They took turns, doubled back, deliberately confusing your sense of direction. By the time the carriage finally lurched to a stop, you had no idea where you were.

***

Now, at dawn, you’re dragged from the carriage and dumped onto the cold, damp ground. The sack still covers your head, swallowing the weak morning light, muffling the murmurs of the men around you. Your captors seem to be handing you over to someone at your destination. Their boss?

A sharp voice cuts through the stillness. A command. Then—the snap of a whip.

Hooves thunder against the dirt as the carriage rattles away, its wooden wheels crunching over loose stones. The sound fades, swallowed by the eerie quiet, leaving only the cold air biting at your skin.

And then—

The sack is ripped from your head.

You blink against the pale morning light, your vision swimming. But even before your eyes fully adjust, you know exactly who stands before you. You recognized his voice the moment his men addressed him. And yet, knowing doesn’t soften the impact of seeing him.

Tommy Shelby.

The most notorious criminal in the city.

The man responsible for your abduction.

You scramble back instinctively, your palms scraping against rough dirt. It’s pointless, of course. A shadow of amusement flickers across Tommy’s face as he watches your desperate attempt to escape.

"It would almost be endearing if it weren’t so fucking pathetic. Where exactly do you think you’re going? I’d only have to reach out to drag you back."

Embarrassment burns through you as you drop your gaze. He’s right. Your flight response is utterly useless here. Instead, you struggle for composure and force yourself to confront him, your voice carrying a defiant edge.

"What do you want from me?"

Tommy exhales slowly, his breath visible in the cold morning air. He takes his time answering, letting the tension stretch unbearably thin.

"Your father," he finally says, "isn’t much of a businessman. Bad at keeping promises. Worse at paying debts."

He pauses briefly.

“Unpaid debts with Thomas Shelby tend to have… unpleasant consequences."

Yes—for me, you think bitterly. What do I have to do with any of this?

But you would never dare to say that out loud. Of course, you know why it had to be you. His only daughter. His most precious treasure. His greatest weakness. But you can’t shake the feeling that there’s something more to it…

“Too bad that you poor thing now have to pay for your father's misdeeds, right?” He sounds amused, without hiding a mocking, pitying undertone. Your stomach tightens. If he were only keeping you as collateral, he wouldn’t be talking about you ‘paying off the debt’. The implication is clear—and terrifying.

A firm grip closes around your wrist, yanking you to your feet. “Get up. You’re coming with me.” Tommy’s tone is sharp, leaving no room for argument. His hold is unrelenting as he pulls you forward, leading you toward a heavy wooden door. He pushes it open with ease. The scent of straw and damp wood fills your lungs as he pulls you inside.

A barn.

The realization settles uneasily in your chest. He’s keeping you here?

You bite your tongue, forcing yourself to stay calm. Any kind of physical resistance, any attempt to escape, would be pointless in your current situation—he’s stronger, faster, and you have no allies here. Struggling would only amuse him further. Instead, you let him shove you down like a lifeless doll onto what passes for a bed, rough straw scratching through your clothes.

Your gaze flickers to Tommy, searching his expression for a hint of what comes next. But he gives nothing away. He’s watching you closely, weighing something in his mind. You know what men like him do to their enemies’ women. And Tommy Shelby isn’t just any man. He’s a predator, a strategist, and if he senses weakness, he will carve it out of you piece by piece.

***

You remember the first time you met, and you could swear that your current plight is anything but a coincidence. Back when you had just started working at this bar, he was enjoying his whiskey when he bluntly asked you if you were a whore. When you said ‘no’ indignantly, he snorted contemptuously, emptied his glass in one go and replied:

"Then you have no business here."

In addition to his condescending manner, you didn't miss his look that showed that he had the power to make you his whore at any time. No, he wasn’t just waiting for your father to make a mistake.

You are pretty sure he provoked it to get hold of you.

***

He studies you for a long moment, unreadable. Then, with quiet authority, he says, “Listen carefully.”

You do. You don’t have a choice.

“There are rules,” he says. “You don’t try to run. You do as I say. Follow them, and your life here might even be… comfortable.”

His voice drops just slightly on the last word, lingering in the air like a promise—or a threat.

Your life here? How long does he think he can keep you? Your father will do everything in his power to get you back. He wouldn't abandon you. And yet, if Tommy only planned to hold you for ransom, why say your life here? Why make it sound as if you’d be staying longer than necessary?

A chilling realization comes to your mind. He didn’t just take you to leverage your father. No, Thomas Shelby isn’t a man who simply waits for things to fall into place.

He uses what’s in his possession. And right now, that includes you.

Anger flares inside you, burning hotter than fear. “Fine,” you snap. “I’ll keep my mouth shut, and you make sure my father pays. Then I assume my carriage home will be waiting.”

For a moment, he says nothing. But Thomas Shelby wouldn’t be Thomas Shelby if he let such defiance go unpunished.

The slap comes fast, sharp, tilting your head with the force of it.

White-hot pain blooms across your cheek. Your breath stutters, but you bite down the sound. You won’t give him the satisfaction.

Tommy leans in slightly, his voice quiet but razor-edged.

"It would be a shame," he murmurs, "if I had to inform your father that his precious collateral had met with an… unfortunate accident." He smirks. "Simply because it refused to cooperate. If I were you, I’d reconsider my attitude. Quickly."

Seething, he grabs a rusty chain, likely once used to tether horses, and locks a shackle around your left wrist, securing it to the chain. It’s just long enough for you to lie down with your arm outstretched on the straw-covered floor.

Without another word, he tosses a thin blanket at you and turns to leave. But before he steps outside, he pauses. The dim morning light catches the sharp cut of his profile as he glances back over his shoulder, watching you for a beat too long.

Then, with a smirk, he murmurs, “Sweet dreams.”

The heavy door swings shut, plunging the stable into a hushed stillness, broken only by the sound of your own breathing. The scent of straw and leather lingers in the air, but so does something else—the phantom heat of his gaze, the unspoken threat in his voice.

You lie motionless, staring at the ceiling, heart pounding. The worst part isn’t the shackle around your wrist.

It’s the fact that deep down, you’re no longer sure whether you fear what Tommy Shelby plans to do with you… or whether you crave it.

Chapter 2: Thirst>>

[inkedbydesire]

Jealous (18+)

Jey Uso x Black Fem Reader

Warning: 18+ Content, SMUT, MINORS DO NOT ENTER

Summary: Everybody does it right? But no one ever wants to talk about it. And you damn sure don’t want to be caught doing it. Your boyfriend Joshua Fatu (aka Jey Uso) was supposed to be out of town (like always). His schedule as a Pro Wrestler kept him constantly traveling away from you. You two spent more time away from each other than you did together. But you never complained because to you, he was worth it. But you still had certain ........... needs. Most of the time you fought those needs until you were near him again but on a few other occasions, you allowed yourself to be consumed by them. And tonight was one of those nights. But what happens when Joshua comes home a day earlier than expected and finds you in your bed enjoying yourself...... without him.

Word Count: 4.1k

A/N: I felt like showing Jey a little love. I apologize in advance for any grammar errors or typos.

*************************************************

"I'm a liar sweetie. I cheat on niggas too. (I DO). You probably shouldn't trust me or I'll hurt your feelings boo. I don't wanna be here but my ex won't take me back so my broken ass is here small talking over apps."  

You let out an audible laugh even though you'd already seen this scene over 100 times. But no matter how many times you've binged Insecure due to it being one of your comfort shows, Issa's antics never failed to put a smile on your face. You shook your head at her nonsense before averting your eyes to your phone. You picked it up in hopes to have received a message from your boyfriend whom you messaged over 30 minutes ago telling him how much you missed him. But sadly as you looked down at your screen, there was nothing. It was currently 1:05 am so you figured he was most likely sleeping in his hotel room after a long day of press and performing in his wrestling event.

This was a weekly occurrence for you guys so this routine was familiar. But being familiar with something doesn't make it any easier. You still missed him terribly when he was on the road. When you met Joshua over 6 months ago, he was very upfront about his lifestyle before things got serious. His career kept him constantly traveling to different cities almost weekly so it was hard for him to lay down a lasting foundation. This had been a problem for him in previous relationships. He told you that he didn't want to end up hurting anyone else or himself so he had sworn off relationships for a while. You two were only supposed to have had a situationship type of thing. It was just supposed to have been two people enjoying each other's company.

But real feelings always have a way of showing up uninvited. Before you knew it you two had fallen for each other. It took you by surprise the most because you never expected to fall so deeply for a man you met in a Waffle House on a drunken night out with your girls. After a long honest talk, you and Joshua decided to try at a relationship even with all of the obstacles you both knew would be in front of you.

But truthfully, the only real obstacle was time. That was something you were already privy to before going in so you never complained. But that didn't stop you from missing the hell out of him anytime he was away. The longing grew more intense when the sun was down and tonight was no different. You were laying here wide awake rewatching Insecure with nothing but Joshua Fatu on your mind. You craved him tonight in a way that was hard to ignore.

And boy did you try.

Maybe it was because you were ovulating due to your pending time of the month. Or maybe it was just because you loved him. But whatever it was it was unbearable.

Joshua would be back in town tomorrow and would be more than willing to satisfy your needs. You knew that. But tonight...... you just couldn't wait that long. Pushing aside your comforter you got out of bed and walked over to your dresser. You opened the drawer that contained your underwear and rummaged through it for a few seconds. It didn't take long for your fingers to wrap around what you were seeking. With your rose in your hand, you retreated to your bed and quickly climbed in.

God, please close your eyes you thought to yourself before reaching over to your nightstand and grabbing your MacBook. You needed a little help getting in the mood and you knew just what would do it.

You clicked around on your laptop before reaching the private folder you were looking for. You hit play on the file then placed your laptop beside you as you slid down onto your back.

"Why are we recording this"  You heard your own voice coming from your laptop followed by the sound of you giggling.

"For fun ... for memories" Joshua's voice answered back.

Now, you weren't crazy enough to let any man get you on camera. That was one of your golden rules. But you did however mutually agree with Joshua to audio record a few of your steamy sessions. You thought it was harmless fun and now you were grateful you had them saved for moments like this since you weren't that into watching porn. You’d rather close your eyes and listen to one of your and Joshua's audios and mentally travel back to that moment.

As you heard the sound of you and Joshua kissing you pulled the oversized shirt, that oddly enough belonged to him, up and slid out of your panties. You kicked them the rest of the way off with your feet as you got more comfortable.

"I been waiting to taste you all damn day baby girl" you heard Joshua's voice say followed by the sound of him lapping up your juices. Your body shuddered at the memory of his talented tongue as you felt an urgent throb build between your inner thighs. You clicked on your rose while you pulled your legs apart. As you reached down to please yourself, for a fleeting moment you wished that Joshua was there.

But unbeknownst to you, he was only a few minutes from your apartment. In a rare turn of events, he was able to travel home a day earlier from his wrestling event than he had in mind. When he arrived back in the city nearly an hour ago, he dropped by his apartment, freshened up, and got right back on the road headed your way. He missed you fiercely and knew you had to be feeling the same way.

He wanted to call and tell you all about it but he thought surprising you with his sudden presence would be better since he rarely got the chance to do so. It pained him to ignore your message about missing him a little while ago but he didn't want to spoil the surprise. But he had a few ways in mind on how he would make it up to you.

Pulling into your apartment complex he quickly found his regular parking spot. He turned his engine off and then grabbed the duffle bag that contained a few day's worth of clothes knowing he would be staying with you for the next couple of days. He damn near jogged up to your apartment powered by his readiness to see you. When he got outside your door he put the code into the lockbox that contained your spare key. He used it to unlock your front door and then returned it to where he found it. He put his hand on your doorknob and quietly eased into your apartment locking the door behind him. He figured you might be asleep right now and only planned on waking you after he slid into your bed and wrapped you in his arms.

He dropped his duffel bag near your sofa and lightly walked towards your bedroom. As he neared your door he heard something that immediately made him stop in his tracks. He leaned his ear towards your slightly cracked door thinking that he was hearing things.

He listened for a few seconds.

No, he wasn't tripping. Those definitely were the sounds of your moans. He knew that like the lyrics of his favorite song.

Beyond curious he cautiously pushed your door open just a little further. Clearly, you were preoccupied and he didn't think you would notice and you didn't. He was able to gain a full view of your bed and what you were doing on it. You were so wrapped up in chasing your climax that the figure looking at you through the slit in your door went unseen. Through the glow of your tv and laptop, he watched your chest heave up and down and your legs shake as you pressed the rose he didn't even know you owned against your clit.

Joshua traveled so much that he figured you had to do something to hold yourself over until he got back but he never thought he'd be witnessing it. He listened to your moans as he watched your body jerk and twitch in a way he thought only he was capable of doing.

Despite the growing bulge in his pants that he had to reach down to adjust, he found that the sight filled him with unwarranted jealousy. Here he was rushing to get back to you and you didn't seem to be missing him at all. In fact, it looked like he was the last thing on your mind. He knew that it was selfish of him to expect you to wait for him to fulfill your sexual needs but part of him wished you did. If anyone or anything was going to make you shake and moan like that he only wanted it to be him. He felt like it was his job and right now you were giving it away.

As he kept his eyes on you he fought extremely hard against the urge to burst into your room to ruin your moment. He knew that you might be agitated or even mad but he would make it up to you by making you cum countless times like he was known to do. And that would set everything straight.

He hesitated for a long while but ultimately with reluctance decided against it.

Taking a step away from your door he waited until he heard the high-pitched moan of you cumming before he walked back towards your front door. Unlocking it again he grabbed the doorknob opening and closing it louder to get your attention. He had plans to bring up what he saw but not just yet. 

Your eyes jolted open from your state of bliss at the sound. Still feeling the effects of your climax you sat up as quick as you could manage and reached over and clicked on the lamp beside your nightstand.

"IT'S ME." you surprisingly heard your boyfriend Joshua's voice yell. You were relieved because, for a split second there, you thought it was an intruder. Joshua was not supposed to be showing up to your apartment tonight.

The distance between your front door and bedroom wasn't that far so you had no time to find and put your panties back on. They were somewhere tangled in your comforter and sheets. But you did have time to slide your rose underneath your pillow, throw your comforter across your lap, and close your laptop before Joshua neared your door.

"Hey baby........ how are you here?" you asked him as he entered your room. You knew that he had one more night away from you so you were a little confused. But maybe there was a change in plans that you didn't know anything about.

But the hows became irrelevant as your heart swelled at the sight of the man you loved.

You wanted so badly to jump into his arms but your legs were still weak from what you were doing no longer than 5 minutes ago. You didn't want to risk wobbling or falling. That would definitely tip off to Joshua that you were in here up to no good. And you didn't want him to know that you were just in here masturbating. It seemed immature but you would be so ashamed if he found out.

You thanked God that he didn't show up to your apartment just a few minutes earlier or he would've caught you right in the middle of the act.

You pushed those thoughts aside as you watched him step out of the Nike slides he had on before walking over to your bed and standing there.

"You not happy to see me?" He asked you. The way it came out sounded like he had a little bit of an attitude. You were clueless on why he would have one with you so you ignored it and chalked it up to you over analyzing the situation because of what he almost caught you doing. And you knew he was most likely questioning your happiness to see him because you didn't dive into his arms like usual. On any other day, you would've been out of your bed meeting him in the living room.

"I'm always happy to see you, Josh." You answered him with a reassuring smile. You couldn't physically show him right now so you had to choose the right words.

"Umm .....  what you doing up this late though?" He asked you.

"Couldn't sleep." You responded.

"So what you been doing to pass the time?" He asked squinting his eyes at you a little.

"I've been watching Insecure.....  like always" You answered him jokingly as you pointed towards your TV where Issa's crazy life was still playing out on your screen.

"That's all?" Joshua asked while raising his brows at you.

As your eyes remained locked on his you weirdly started to feel like you were under interrogation. You searched your brain but couldn't figure out what for. But it definitely seemed like Joshua was trying to get something out of you.

What though?

The only other thing you were doing before he showed up felt too personal and embarrassing to say out loud so you had no plans on disclosing it to him.

"Yep.... that's pretty much all," you replied to him lying while you shrugged your shoulders. Joshua stared at you for a moment longer before walking over to the side of the bed that you were on.

"That's funny 'cause that's not what I saw." He stated as he sat down near you.  His words caused your heart to sink to the pit of your stomach but you had to keep your composure.

"And what did you see?" you asked him already feeling like you knew the answer but needing the confirmation before you started freaking out. Without immediately responding Joshua just looked into your eyes with a smirk and it all started making sense. You felt like you were being interrogated earlier because you were. Joshua already knew the answer to everything he was asking you because he already knew what you had been up to.

You wondered how in the hell did he know though ....

After a few seconds of shuffling things around in your brain, you put two and two together and figured Joshua must've come into your apartment a whole lot earlier than he made known. You were so consumed with pleasuring yourself that your apartment could've been on fire and you wouldn't have moved a muscle. So you damn sure didn't hear him entering your apartment or coming near your door. You noted to yourself that you needed to be more attentive the next time or at least tackle the basics like closing and locking your damn bedroom door. But you weren't expecting Joshua tonight so you didn't think you needed to be that cautious.

"I didn't even know you had one of those things," Joshua said bringing you out of your thoughts as he reached beside you and started running his hand over your comforter. When he didn't find what he was looking for there he then moved towards your pillows.

"Okay." you quickly said while grabbing his hand before it made contact with your rose. It clicked in your mind that that's what he was feeling around for.

"If you already knew what I was doing .... why you come in here like Inspector Gadget?" you asked him.

The thought of him seeing you in that intimate moment was sending waves of crippling embarrassment through you. Joshua was your boyfriend and had seen you in way more compromising positions but this whole ordeal was still awkward as hell to you. Discovering that something you thought you were doing in private wasn’t as hidden as you thought is a deeply embarrassing feeling.

But you still wanted to be mature about everything.

"I just wanted to see what you would say. No wonder you in here acting like you didn't miss me. You got me replaced." he said.

You searched his face for more amusement because he was clearly getting a kick out of all of this but to your surprise, he actually looked rather serious.

"Wait ... you accusing me of replacing you with an object?" You asked him after you two silently stared at each other for a few minutes. This realization overshadowed any embarrassment you felt about the situation. Now you understood why he seemed to have had an attitude with you when he first entered your room. He saw you with your rose and got jealous. It was taking everything in you not to laugh in his face.

"It's okay for you to enjoy yourself when I'm not here. I understand it. But I'm just saying you were enjoying yourself a little too much." He stated still serious as a heart attack which made it a lot harder to contain your laughter.

"Josh you're not being replaced." You chuckled as you placed your hand on his shoulder to reassure him not believing you actually had to do so. You couldn't believe that this was a conversation you two were actually having.

"I only pull it out when I miss you and I can't stand it anymore," you told him.

"I don't think you understand how badly I want you when you're not here Josh" you added with honesty as your eyes locked on each other's. Yeah, there were certain things you could do to try to pacify your desire for Joshua but nothing compared. So for him to feel a way about an object was bonkers to you. But at the same time, you found it kind of cute.

"I'm here now." Joshua responded to you.

"And what's that supposed to mean?" you asked him playfully as the atmosphere in the room shifted.

"Let me show you," he stated as he reached down grabbed your leg, and pulled you closer to him on the bed.

"My bad for coming in here tripping but it was because I missed you, baby girl." He admitted before leaning over and placing a small kiss on your forehead. You smiled at him as he moved down and pecked your nose before moving to your mouth. You two then fell into a kiss that had the passion of two people who hadn't seen each other in years rather than a few days. You relished in the moment knowing you had to make the most of any time you got with him. That was the basics of your relationship. Every single moment counted because he would be on the road again in the blink of an eye.

As Joshua's hands roamed all over your body he tilted his head down and planted soft kisses on your neck. As he tossed your comforter aside he moved back up to slip his tongue into your mouth.

A couple of intoxicating minutes later, Joshua broke the kiss by standing up leaving you needing way more from him. He then posted up on the side of your bed and you giggled as he reached down and pulled you by your ankle to position you in front of him. You then had the pleasure of watching him as he pulled off his hoodie and shirt all in one swift motion. As you took in how absolutely fine he was your inner thighs throbbed needily. Sometimes all it took was just looking at him to leave you soaking.

"Lay back for me Y/N." He requested and you eagerly did as you were told without any hesitation. You scooted up on your bed and laid back in front of him as he positioned himself between your legs. Staring down at you while running his tongue across his lips, he placed one of his hands on your thigh. He slowly trailed his hand up glazing your clit with his thumb which made your legs involuntarily jolt because you were still sensitive from what you were doing earlier. He ran his thumb up and down your clit teasing you for what felt like ages. It made your wetness grow but it also frustrated you. Then he left you feeling desperate and depraved again as he took his attention off of you for a split second to rid himself of his pants and boxers.

He held his dick in one of his hands while he pushed your legs further apart with the other as he repositioned himself. You sucked in a sharp breath as he ran the tip of his dick up and down your entrance coating it in your wetness. Again, he did that for what felt like ages while you laid there desperately needing more.

"Josh" you breathed out his name as he lifted his dick and tapped it down on your swollen clit.

"Please" you urged him as he repeated the same motion with more pressure making you squirm and reach down to grab hold of his wrist.

"Please what?" He asked you while flicking his eyes up to yours. You knew that he knew full well what you wanted but he loved to play this game. He loved to get you a position where you were practically begging for his dick before he gave it to you. And each time you would feed into his ego.

"Fuck me, Josh .... please" you begged with a pout giving him what you knew he was seeking. He smiled down at you and before you could say another word or prepare your self he suddenly gripped you by your hip and sank his full length into you. But you soon found out that Joshua wasn't done with playing with you yet as he pulled out of you and went back to teasing and tapping your clit with the tip of his dick. You laid there beyond frustrated but felt satisfied when he slipped into your wetness again.

"Fuck" you muttered lowly as he eased in and out of you slowly making your body shudder with every stroke.

"Feels good baby?" He asked you as he kept that same deliberate speed while his dick continuously glazed against your g-spot. You nodded at him as you gently bit down on your bottom lip.

"Say it," he told you as he slipped in and out of your wetness.

"It f-feels good Josh. It feels so fucking good." You expressed to him as you felt pleasure filled knots building in the pit of your stomach. Closing your eyes you focused on trying to hold off climaxing as you grew wetter for Joshua as his speed quickened. Your eyes only flew open again when you heard the familiar buzzing of your rose. You looked up at Joshua wondering when and how he managed to reach over and locate it without your knowledge. But you were so drunk on feeling him inside of you that your mind was completely preoccupied.

"W-what are you doing?" you were barely able to ask him as he didn't miss a beat fucking you. His still plunged in and out of your entrance as he held your rose in the hand he wasn't using to hold your legs apart.

"I wanna try something." He responded.

"Try wh-" you began to ask but were completely cut off by Joshua bringing your rose down onto your clit. Now you could handle your rose on its own but combined with Joshua's dick rocking in and out of you, you almost started seeing stars at the sensation.

"J-Josh ... wait ....oooh fuck ..." you moaned out as you reached down and attempted to push his hand away not being able to handle the pleasure. Your attempt failed miserably as Joshua didn't budge. He continued to pound in and out of you as he used your rose on your clit.

"I c-can't J-Josh" you whined out to him as your toes curled and your legs violently shook. You felt tears welling up as your breathing became shallow and your heartbeat accelerated.

"Yes you can ... you got it baby"  Joshua encouraged you as he pounded deeper and deeper into your wetness. You tried to take it but the feeling was too powerful for you to comprehend causing your climax to hit you like a tidal wave out of nowhere. All kinds of profanities left your mouth as it felt like you were having an out of body experience.

Joshua was satisfied as he watched you lose yourself as you squirted cum all over his dick. That's when he knew he could use your rose to his advantage. 

[creativewritersposts]

"I am not!" - Lando Norris

summary; Lando Norris x f! reader

It's the first time Lando gets jealous, his dramatic moves can be very entertaining

warning(s); none, maybe grammar errors

author's note; requested. It was an honor to write it!

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"hello, can you tell me where the hotel is?", a tall good looking man stands in front of you. He's taller than Lando. "Of course", you smirk, typical tourists. "thank you, your boyfriend looks familiar", the man stares at Lando. "He's famous ", you giggle, "formula one racer". The man laughs with you, "Lando Norris? Lucky girl", his shoulder flirts with yours. You can see Lando in the background, he hides that he's looking at you.

"We're in hurry, sorry. Have fun!", you wink at him and walk back to Lando. He looks up from his phone, sunglasses on. "hey love", you kiss his lips quickly and twist your hands together. Usually Lando would mock you for this nickname, but now he just nods. "I love you", you tell him whilst walking through the park. "until you have his number", his british accent gets sarcastic. "Are you jealous because I talked to a tourist?", you laugh out. Lando touches his forearm, straight poker face. "I am not jealous", he shakes his head, until he sees your smirk, "I am not!", he gets a dramatic move. "sure, you're not", you giggle. "Why would I? I'm a millionaire and I please you in every single way", he talks in a bittersweet voice. "mh", you mumble. "What the heck means mh?", Lando stops your weekly walk, completely outraged. It's just hilarious, like donald duck.

"Nothing ", you grin at him. He huffs, it's making him jealous. Of course he is. You know all bad sides about him. He loves you and doesn't want to lose this relationship.

"Are you telling me, I'm not the best boyfriend ever?", lando's voice gets higher and higher. "this man could be the one, too", you laugh tears. He should know you're just teasing.

"I can't live like that!", he is pissed and stops holding hands, walking back to this guy. "Lando -", you run after him. "Lando!-", you yell even more, your lungs are burning. You didn't know Lando is this athletic. "Land-", you finally grabbing his arm, but too late. The unknown man looks down to Lando, "hi man!". Lando's face looks not friendly. "stop flirting with my girlfriend!", he points at him. The unknown man looks confused, "what do you mean?", "stop flirting with her or I'll run over you with my car!", he growls. "dude you have serious problems. I'm taken, my wife is on toilet". Lando breathes out, "oh okay. Have a nice day mate", touching your shoulders with him to turn around. After a minute walking without any word, you can't hold back anymore. "Lando you're jealous!", you laugh so loud, the neighbors will hear you, for sure.

"Shut up", he is embarrassed. You hug him tight, "I only love you".

"I hope so, because I'm the best boyfriend ever"

[iiotic]

─── જ ‎` ‎𓂃 ‎ viktor sfw alphabet

𖦹 ‎quick disclaimer: generally fluff, platonic/romantic mix, gn reader mentioned, kisses, not proff read

english is not my first language, so i apologize for any grammar mistakes.

masterlist | nav.

A - Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Viktor isn't the most affectionate person that you'd meet. in fact he would be quite distant before getting to know you first, thinking that you don't deserve his time. However once he really gets to know you and start trusting you will he show his affection and appreciation through small acts of service.

B - Best friend (What are they like as a friend? How would the friendship start?)

Viktor is an amazing force to have on your team, however that might sound like. He's smart, loyal and trustworthy. I think that the friendship would develop a lot quicker if either A. you knew him since he was a child and still lived in zaun or B. you'd capture his attention and not the other way around.

as i said the friendship would start with Viktor being a little distant at first, but then he will start to appreciate you company and trust you a lot more. show him that you're trustworthy and really like him and he will warm up to you.

C - Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

In the beginning of the relationship Viktor was strictly against cuddles, it made him feel weak. However once you show him how good it feels, with him trusting you 100% he will change his opinion on cuddling. Viktor is slightly bony so hugging him wouldn't be the most comfortable thing, and yet it feels so warm and loving everytime you cuddle, you just can't complain!

D - Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

I think that he'd like to settle down, if it comes to s1 Viktor, however there might be a little controversy. Viktor spends time at his lab 24/7 so he wouldn't be at home with you all the time. The times he is at home he is way too tired, exhausted even to help you cook and clean.

However if there would be a situation where either you or Jayce convince him to take a weekly break, with you, at home. so that he could relax and do domestic things with you, he would 100% try to help you with chores. (if his leg wouldn't hurt so much this day)

E - Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

I don't think that Viktor would ever want to break up with their partner, he will fall in love with one person so hard that he'd want to live with them his entire life. would be truly heartbroken if you'd break up with him.

F - Fiancé (How to they feel about commitment? How quickly would they want to get married?)

he would want to get married but wouldn't like to rush things, you know? he'd need to know all about you, whether it would be your weird quirks or just the specific shade of your favourite colour. about 4/6 years i think before he could propose, then the wedding in a year or three.

G - Gentle (How gentle are they? Both physically and emotionally?)

he always touches you as if you were a porcelain doll that would break under his fingers if he squeezed too hard. with you? he's the most gentle person in the entire piltover.

H - Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it and what is it like?)

Viktor hugs are warm, gentle and loving. they always make you feel heard and the way he holds you speak volumes, the unspoken words that could come out of his mouth don't need to be spoken anymore. despite that hugs with Viktor aren't often, yet he likes hugging you.

I - I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

you'd probably have to say it first, he'd say it back to you. it really depends when you will start saying it, trust me he will say it back every single time.

J - Jealous (How jealous do they get? What are they like when they're jealous?)

Viktor doesn't like the feeling of jealousy, he doesn't want to feel this way. Viktor is very insecure about himself, his leg, his disease and there you were talking to another men who's bigger than him, that you could easily replace him with, it makes his blood boil.

yet, he trusts you. he trusts you to not do something stupid. he will stay quiet, occasionally glaring at the person but not trying to make himself known.

K - Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

he loves being kissed on his forehead and nose. something about them is so romantic, yet domestic that makes him melt every time. he loves to kiss you anywhere really, he doesn't have a preference.

when it comes to kissing Viktor on the mouth, making out with him the kisses would be slow, slightly sloppy yet romantic enough for the both of you.

L - Little Ones (How are they around children?)

he's neutral about kids, he wouldn't like to have any children himself yet for some reasons kids always seem to like him

M - Mornings (How are morning spent with them?)

the rare mornings where you wake up not to an cold empty side of the bed, but with your beloved Viktor are truly an moments worth remembering. If there's no rush, mornings are slow, cuddling in the bed with the sun trying to get it in the room with the curtains closed, a few kisses shared here and there. domestic things.

N - Nights (How are nights spent with them?)

he sleeps a little stiff, cuddle him!! he's a little bony but its not usual for you to sleep together.

O - Openess (When will they start revealing things about themselves? Do they reveal things slowly over time or all at once?)

Viktor as i said before not once, not twice will be closed and distant at first yet once he starts trusting you more he might reveal a few of his traumas of his childhood, but you'd have to be deep into the relationship for that to happen. the moment would have to be right, almost fragile if you know what i mean.

P - Patience (How easily are they angered?)

he is not angered easily, quite the opposite actually. Viktor will be really patient with you and he'd like to recieve the same treatment from you in return. however if you'll insult his intelligence, work or make him feel bad because of his disability or diseases he will be mad. furious.

Q - Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail or do they forget the minor things?)

when this man is in true love he will remember every single detail that you mention, even accidentally. i don't like when people say that he will forget about important events for you two because he is a workaholic, i dont think he would. he will know what your favourite subject was in middle school, your favourite shade of your favourite color (the very specific one), your favourite flower, what zodiac sign you are, whats your favourite type of cake, what's your favourite ice cream flavour, the food that makes you gag when you see it, your least favourite season. you name it and he will know it.

R - Remember (What's their favourite memory of the relationship?)

probably the moment he realized he loves you or your first kiss. i don't want to dwell on it, but i might make a one shot or a drabble based on it.

S - Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

i hate when people say that he would need to be protected because he can't do shit himself, if you agree with this might as well block me. maybe he is disabled but he is totally capable of standing up for himself. when it comes to you? he will be protective, you're one of the few good things that happened in his life.

T - Try (How much effort do they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts and everyday tasks?)

listen, this man is tired so he won't put much efford into everyday tasks or such. But! he puts a lot of efford into the gifts or dates he organises for you two, might be so nervous that he forgets to give you the gift but praise him and give him his own kind of present and he will be over the moon if you know what i mean.

U - Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

he is a workaholic, overworking himself. sometimes forgets to do basic tasks like eating, drinking etc.

V - Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

he doesn't care about how he looks, i mean he cares but not to the point of trying to dye his hair or something. dresses neatly, sometimes his hair is a little out of place but that's okay!!

W - Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

if it would be really early into the relationship than absolutely not, but other than that. yes, yes he would.

X - Xtra (A random head cannon for them)

specific, hates jam.

Y - Yuck (What are some things they wouldn't like in a partner, or in general?)

someone who wouldn't support his dreams and ideas. someone sho would show absolutely 0 interest in his rambling. someone generally who is always negative and does not see anything good about anything.

Z - Zzz (What are some sleeping habits of theirs?)

snores, but like really quietly. wakes up late at night because of his nightmares sometimes.

© 2024 iiotic. — do not steal, translate or repost any of my content onto any other platform

[iamthedamndonutdrawcat]

Berlin maradures au????

now listen! berlin hipster modern marauders band au. (i'm sorry this is brutally self-indulgent and may be incomprehensible to anyone outside berlin but i need to put it somewhere) this is a long post, so i put it under the cut. please excuse the word vomit :)

they all go to a grammar school that's a bit too shitty to call itself elite but does anyway. many children of bureaucrats, diplomats etc. that think they're ghetto f.e. James, Sirius and Remus. (Peter is the only normal one tyvm)

the marauders met as classmates in year 5. Remus and Sirius are forced into the school choir. all marauders learn acoustic tradtional instruments but their "band" is actually a soundcloud rap project. James and Peter build BAD beats and Sirius fixes them. they all do enjoy indie/rock and sometimes have jam sessions and do covers. artistic duo Remus & Sirius. intense homoerotic friendship James & Sirius. wolfstar endgame. Sirius curates a spotify account with only extremely niche melancholic rap to impress Remus; actually knows german trash rap by heart. serenades Remus with Ski Aggu "love" songs during Remus' depressive phases.

Sirius and James are third generation immigrants; Sirius turkish on his mother's side, James indian. Sirius family is not necessarily evil, just conservative diplomats with a big pride in tradition & well behaviour; far removed from their own cultural & religious roots in order to integrate into german political structures. however they are homophobic/unaccepting towards Sirius. Sirius grows up in a very german environment, gets misjudged by racist teachers. extremely smart yet often lazy. at school they're permitted to use ipads and chatgpt does his entire course work; he spends his time gaming during class. vape enthusiast although he gets horrible coughing attacks.

Remus's background is very international, somewhat french on Lyall's side and arab roots on mom's side, they met in england and moved to berlin with child Remus. Rip Remus' mom. Remus & Lyall live in a nice old apartment (Altbauwohnung) in berlins Pankow district (lots of families, settled down hipsters, sligh shift into suburban terrain), Lyall is either a lawyer or diplomat, 50/50 works or spends time with his girlfriend. crunchy distant father-son-relationship. but because no ones ever home, Remus constantly has friends (and Sirius) over. Remus has BPD, is in therapy and doing pretty well in his later adolesence. Remus spends lots of time outside, drinking in parks, chilling at friends', or smokes too much weed in his room. unapologetic chain smoker, even in front of Lyall. quiet and shy, makes him seem either rude or mysterious. bookworm & music nerd. nokia + ipod combo instead of smartphone because he doesn't want screen addiction or be too reachable. vape hater, point of argument with sirius.

accidental wolfstar public outing after Sirius drunkenly performs an Ikkimel song at a party and then throws himself at Remus (they don't really gaf anymore). For Halloween they dress up as a Cigarette and a Beer (Sternburger Export).

James watches german meme compilations every night and knows them by heart. Footie enthusiast with Sirius, drags the marauders to big games where they almost get trampled. extreme alman energy (aka white german energy, upstuck, snobbish and happily embarassing, taking part in typical german shenanigans) just like Sirius, except Sirius tries to hide it and James can deal with the jokes at his expense. James was a tv addict as a child. James & Sirius friendship began over a shared interest in anime.

Peter is the token german kid. Fridays for future gave him a bad conscience and all the marauders joined him in the demonstrations to get out of class. Extreme stoner, at least bi-weekly sessions with Remus. also i like the art kid peter hc so i'm stealing it. art kid peter who draws cartoons of his friends.

Lily & Severus live in the inner city Wedding district, rougher than the outer parts where Sirius & James live. Lily & Remus bff duo. (ik this is very boy centric, i have yet to dig deeper into my headcanons for the girls)

.

i have a lot of music associations, but they actually are nice songs so idc here they are...

songs to illustrate the vibes: Nachts wach by makko, Rasenschach by Filow, FUSSBALLMÄNNER by Ikkimel, Wenn du tanzt by Von Wegen Lisbeth

Remus coded songs: Marlboro Mann by Romano, Goldener Reiter by Joachim Witt, Ziemlich Verplant by Skinny Dazed (!!!), Alt sein by Pisse

Sirius coded songs: BIKINI GRELL by Ikkimel, Immer nur da by Fynn Kliemann, Klebstoff by Mine (extreme black brother angst vibes), Findelkind by Mine (i could make a whole seperate post on how wolfstar-coded Mine's & Fynn Kliemann's discographies are)

James coded songs: Haus am See by Peter Fox, Verschwende deine Zeit by Edwin Rosen (prongsfoot vibes imo)

Peter coded songs: Alles Gute by Faber, Bongzimmer by SXTN

[pandora-writes-one-piece]

The Meet-Cute - Zoro's Story - 2

Source for pic

Trouble 2

Word Count: 4550

Tags For The Whole Story: Fem!Reader; Protective!Zoro; Soft!Zoro; Sexual Tension; Teasing; Flirting; Mature Audiences (I'll always tag the NSFW chapters); Modern Day AU; Reader is being stalked; Fear; Paranoia; Angst; Rom-Com Vibes; Mild Gore-like Descriptions; Blood; Dead Animals Mentioned; Reader in a terror-like state; Fluff; Romance; Banter; Manipulation; Miscommunication; Frustration; Reader is very clumsy;

Special Warning: English is not my first language, I apologise for any possible spelling or grammar mistakes.

Summary: After moving away from the hustle and bustle of Grand Line City to help your father around the property following a horse-riding accident - and in the hopes of healing your broken heart after your asshole ex-fiancé cheated - you settle into the country calmness of the Calm Belt. You and Zoro are slowly returning to your easy friendship filled with banter and flirting and you actually begin to glimpse a future with the green-haired cop. But then you start to receive weird gifts. They quickly escalate to manipulative texts. And now you're stuck in a spiral of terror and there's no way to get help because the Stalker, whoever he is, is threatening something other than just your life.

Notes: Chapter 2 is here! Please enjoy while everything is light and fluffy 😋 Maybe the author will quickly turn this into angst and horror! Who knows? 😯

Masterlist | |Chapter 2| | |Chapter 3|

Saturday comes in a heartbeat, and with it, a lingering anxiety. Zoro assured you that you had nothing to worry about, and deep down, you know he’s right. But that still does nothing to stop the churning in your stomach or the maddening pounding of your heart.

Luffy had long since left his grandpa’s house, your neighbour, but he had traded the farmhouse for a nice, cosy home not too far away, and with a backyard big enough to host weekly gatherings, as Nami had filled you in. 

One that’s standing right in front of you.

Your shaky breath does nothing to soothe your lingering nerves, and you clutch the strap of your bag tighter as you fidget with your hair. Then you stop, tempted to turn back around, deciding that perhaps this isn’t a good idea at all.

Who, in their right mind, would want to hang out with someone they haven’t seen in forever?

Are you boring company? Are you actually fun to hang out with? They remember you from when you were a teenager. Years have passed. Will they still like you?

“Oi? Are you coming in or not?” Zoro’s gruff voice is enough to ground you, and you nod, taking two shaky steps forward before you regain your stride. “You’re late.” He grumbles from his leaning position on the front porch where, apparently, he was waiting for you.

“Fashionably late. It’s a thing, google it.” You quip back, a quick grin spreading with the easiness of your and Zoro’s banter. 

“How can you say that with a straight face when I just witnessed you wavering in the front yard, pissing your pants from meeting your oldest friends?” Zoro gives a thumbs-down and blows a raspberry. “Shaaaame!”

“Shut up! I thought your bad sense of direction had rubbed off on me for a second, and I was lost.” Climbing the steps, you meet his gaze with a look of defiance, but he merely snickers at you. 

“I’ll pretend to believe you, Trouble.”

You take a deep breath and face the closed door, licking your lips nervously as you fidget with your hair again. 

“There’s no need to be nervous. We’re all friends, and everybody’s missed you.” Zoro nudges your shoulder with his, and you chuckle. 

“Right.”

“Ready?”

“Let’s make an entrance.” And damn it, if your words aren’t a prediction. As soon as you open the door, you stumble on your feet, almost falling face-first to the floor, if not for Zoro’s steadying hand around your upper arm.

“That’s one way to do it…” He mumbles through clenched teeth, and you grimace. But there’s no more time to counter-argue or to say anything else, really. All you see is a red blur, and then you’re being held in a tight hug. Luffy’s arms grip you as if he’s made of rubber, his smile so wide it’s contagious, and you can’t help but smile and hug him back. 

Why were you nervous, anyway?

-*-

Everyone is as friendly and welcoming as you remembered them to be. Nobody treats you as an outsider, as you feared, and the evening goes by smoothly. You meet new people: Vivi, Nami’s beautiful girlfriend, and you bond instantly since she’s such a kind person. Then there’s Chopper, the youngest of the group. Apparently, they’ve been classmates since junior year of highschool - after you left - because he skipped a few years, being practically a genius. A very shy, adorable genius. Barto, a very punk-rock-looking man, seems to follow Luffy around and indulge him in all kinds of shenanigans. 

Sanji is the most recent addition to the group, but he blends in so well that it's almost as if he's always been part of the gang. You all get along like you’ve never left, and you’re having the time of your life. 

At one point, the groups separate casually: Robin and Nami are huddled on the sofas, gossiping about a party at their office and the ensuing scandal; Kaya and Vivi are secretly shopping for a gift for Nami’s birthday on the front porch; Sanji is preparing more food with Luffy and Barto hovering around; and Chopper is playing a videogame with Usopp. You travel from one place to another, throwing your two cents when asked, but you notice the casual way Zoro follows you around, almost like he’s hovering, expecting you to need him at any given moment.

You don’t think he’s doing it on purpose, though. As Kaya and Vivi return to the living room, you sit with the girls and notice Zoro leaning against the doorframe, closing his eyes as if he’s resting them, but his stance is alert. Then you go cheer on Chopper, who seems a bit overwhelmed by Usopp’s prowess in the game, and Zoro follows you, lingering in front of Usopp long enough to make him lose the game. 

When you go to the kitchen, Sanji is leaving with more food, and you decide to tidy up the dirty dishes before joining them, feeling a bit overwhelmed yourself. After a few seconds, as the warm water from the tap relaxes you into an easy smile, Zoro appears, leaning casually against the counter, facing you. Close enough that you can smell his strong cologne.

“Hey, Troublemaker. Making trouble?”

A smirk tugs at your lips as you rinse a glass. “Not this time. I’m sitting pretty tight. Didn’t even bump into any chair for about half an hour.”

“That’s an improvement right there.” He teases back, and you chuckle. A small, comfortable silence lingers as he takes a sip of his beer. “You don’t have to do that, you know? If the cook sees you doing that, you’ll give him a stroke.”

“Sanji is being very nice by cooking for all of us. I can lighten his load by cleaning up. Besides, I needed a little space.” You let out an exasperated sigh.

“The crew’s too much, right? You’re not used to it anymore, Trouble?”

Shaking your head, you rinse the last glass and turn off the tap, wiping your hands on the clean rag that’s hanging by the counter. “Not used to it at all! But it’s… refreshing.” You turn fully towards him and realise he’s even closer now. 

“And don’t you feel silly now?” He laughs, and you roll your eyes.

“Extremely. I don't know what I was afraid of.” You take another step, being pulled towards him like a magnet. There’s just something about Zoro’s steadying presence that makes you feel safe and secure. 

“We’ve missed you.” He whispers, his smile dropping at the same time as his eye lingers on your lips as you wet them with your tongue. “I’ve missed you.”

“Yeah?” You ask, nonchalantly. There’s no denying that there’s attraction between you and Zoro. Heck, it’s always been there, even when you were teens. Is now finally the time when you two can act on it?

“Hey, have you seen– shit! Sorry!” Nami curses and turns away when she sees you and Zoro practically over each other. You and Zoro fall apart quickly, a blush spreading fast on your cheeks.

What were you two about to do? Isn’t it too soon for this? You can’t do this! You and Zoro are friends, you don’t want any relationship. 

“Nami! What did you want?” You ask with a squeaky voice as you turn to arrange a plate of snacks. 

Nami chuckles and exits the kitchen. “Nothing, nothing, forget I was here! Carry on, carry on…” She sing-songs, and you grunt. Zoro just chuckles, and the moment passes. 

-*-

Night falls down pretty quickly and Sanji decides to fire up the grill in Luffy’s backyard. You’re not sure how anyone can eat another bite, but then again, Luffy is always ravenous and Sanji likes to please. So food keeps appearing and disappearing in a heartbeat. There’s a slight chill in the air so someone lights up Luffy’s backyard fire pit, and Nami is already petitioning for the games to turn into drinking games. 

Sanji finishes up grilling the meat and sits down to complete the circle. Nami giggles when Zoro sits on the arm of the lounge chair you’re sitting on, but you try to ignore her. You can almost feel the body heat leaving him and trailing up your skin, though, no matter how close to the pit - and Zoro - you are, you can’t help shivering slightly.

Zoro raises a brow at you and sheds his jacket, draping it casually over your shoulders without another word. Your face raises to meet his, but his eye is back on the fire pit, hand clutching the bottle he brought for himself. You can’t help but feel your cheeks warm up as you snuggle against the warmth of his jacket. “Thanks.” You mumble and he grunts back at you.

“Marshmallows!” Chopper exclaims excitedly when Robin passes a bag around along with some skewers. You giggle and reach for one, but Zoro steals it away before you have a chance to grab it.

“What are you trying to do, Trouble? Skewer yourself or get burnt? I’ll roast you a damn marshmallow.” He says between grumbles and positions himself in a way he can roast the sweet, though his attitude is a stark contrast to his annoyed words. 

“Hey! I can very well roast my own sweets!” Crossing your arms, you pout and scowl at him, but that only manages to make him smirk. 

“Yeah, I bet you can. I just don't think the sweets will be the only thing roasted when you're done.”

“Mean!”

“Truth teller!” He counters and you jab him in the ribs to coax a laugh out of him, instead of those annoying snickers and chuckles, but it doesn't work, it only manages to make him wince. 

It takes a bit of back and forth for you two to notice Nami staring at both of you with a knowing smirk, her arm laced around Vivi’s waist. When you see her, you swear even your ears turn red as she begins to laugh. 

“See, honey,” Nami leans towards Vivi, “aren't they cute?”

“The cutest.” Vivi quips back and you sink in your seat. Zoro seems unfazed, though, as he squishes your marshmallow between two crackers and a piece of chocolate. 

“S’more. Take it.” You mumble a thank you and immediately shove the thing in your mouth, trying to disappear from your friends scrutinizing gaze, since Zoro's attentiveness only makes them snicker more. “It's still hot so don't–” Zoro turns and sees you huffing and waving at your open mouth, a deadpan look crossing his features. “You just had to, didn't you? I should've known…”

That just makes Nami and Vivi cackle more. When you finally manage to swallow the s'more, there's tears gathering at the corner of your eyes, so Zoro pulls out the bottle he's been nursing the entire evening and reaches for a glass, filling it with two fingers of the crystal clear liquid and handing it to you. 

“Here, this will help.”

Wiping your tears you accept the glass. The ice floating in the - almost pale golden - liquid, seems like paradise to your scalding tongue, so you swirl it a bit before sipping slowly. It's like tasting silk. Smooth, delicate and floral-like in its flavor. You've never tasted sake as delicious as this one. 

You hum in contentment, your tongue still aching, but much more at ease. “This is exquisite, Zoro. Where did you get this sake?”

He smirks, proudly, resting the bottle against his chest as if it's a prized possession. “Daiginjo Sake. The best there is. Mihawk, my Captain, gave a case of it to me some time ago, for an achievement.” His eyes focus far away but he doesn't elaborate and you don't press. 

“I can't believe this!” Nami says, irritation dripping from her words. “I've been begging you to let me try it for years, Zoro! Years!”

She seems genuinely annoyed and you open your mouth, clearly caught in the midst of a battlefield of an ancient war. 

“We've been through this, Witch, you don't appreciate good liquor. It would be wasted on you.”

Sanji gasps like he was the one personally offended by the comment and your eyes jump from Zoro to Nami to Sanji. “Take that back, Mosshead! Apologise to the lady!”

Mosshead? Your eyes linger on Zoro's head and there's a flicker of recognition when you connect the nickname to the why of it. Zoro growls at Sanji, shoots you a warning look, as if daring you to tease him about the nickname, and gets up with clenched fists. 

“Wanna start, Curly?”

Curly? Oh! The Vinsmoke brows. Dang, that would've been a good quip to throw at Ichiji way back when. 

The two men face off, faces inches from each other, and Nami sighs. You shrug and offer her the glass. “Want to try it?”

She shakes her head, a silly giggle dancing on her lips. “Girl, I tasted it the year he got it. He just never realised it. I'm such a good thief.” She throws her tongue at you while Vivi shakes her head. “I just said it to rile him up. Aaaaand to prove a point.The drink is special, and he just shared it with you.”

Nami lets that thought linger in the air as she grabs Vivi’s hand, pulling her away from the scene. Then she stops near Sanji and Zoro and exaggerates a faint. “Oh, what I wouldn't give for a warm, soothing drink.” 

Sanji perks up, stops fighting with Zoro, and with a swirl and a declaration goes off to give Nami and Vivi a warm beverage. Zoro keeps grumbling as he sits on the arm of your chair again, his brows furrowed and lips pursed. 

“Thank you.” You say after a moment of silence when he sticks more marshmallows on a skewer, probably imagining swirly brows in each and every one of them. 

“For what?”

For what? Everything… “Making me feel like I'm still part of the crew? Giving me a s'more? Your jacket? A taste of your prized booze?” You chuckle nervously. Nami has been pointing at it the entire evening, but is she right, though? Does Zoro think you're special? “Choose…”

You don't look at him and he doesn't look at you. The fire suddenly seems much more interesting. 

“It's nothing.” He answers after a while. But glancing at him from the corner of your eye, lets you know his ears are red and his frown turned into a slight smile. 

-*-

“Come on, Nami, aren't we a little old for that?” Zoro grumbles as she boos him. 

“You're never too old for a game of ‘Never Have I Ever’, right, gang?”

There are boos and cheers all around, but eventually, the crew agrees to play the game. Mainly because it's cold and Usopp found an old bottle of whiskey that Garp had given Luffy when he bought the house. 

“I'll start: Never have I ever… drank until I passed out!” Nami starts with a giggle and sips her drink. Everybody but Luffy and Chopper takes a sip and agrees. 

Usopp is next, and he snickers, eyeing both Luffy and Chopper, who are now behind on the game. “Never have I ever eaten so much meat - or sweets - that my belly got bigger!”

Luffy and Chopper whine and sip their drinks, a tiny sip, followed by a big chug of cola to mask the booze flavor. Barto also takes a sip, and the crew laughs at that. 

It's your turn, and you see Zoro yawn from the corner of your eye, so you decide to mess with him. “Never have I ever fallen asleep during work hours.”

“Damn you, Trouble.” He says, amused, before sipping the drink.

“How did that happen, officer?” You smirk, quirking your brow, waiting for him to brush you off, but he becomes rather serious. 

“Murder investigation, way back. I found the body, so I assisted the detectives. Pulled shift after shift, barely resting until we caught the culprit. Had to find effective ways to rest in between.”

You weren't expecting that… 

“Wow, Zoro, I don't think you've ever graced us with that much explanation on why you did something…” Nami says nonchalantly before staring at you, deadpan. “Looks like someone's special!” 

There she is again, hinting at that. But are you really? 

The game continues with silly exclamations and serious ones, and after a while, nobody feels cold anymore, and laughter comes easily around the circle. 

“Ohhhhhh, I've got a good one!” 

“Nami…” You whine at your friend, somehow already anticipating some form of embarrassment from her sentence. 

“Never have I ever…” her eyes glint mischievously as she locks her gaze with everyone before setting her brown eyes on yours with a smirk. “Had a crush on someone sitting in this circle.”

You freeze. Shit. Almost everyone takes a sip, but your hand seems frozen. Will it be obvious who your crush is? It probably already is, anyway… so, with a sigh and blazing cheeks, you sip the drink. 

Zoro does, too. 

And chaos ensues. 

There are wolf whistles all around, cheers and whoops, and you don't know if you should giggle or feel mortified. 

But Nami strikes again before you have a chance to do either. “Wait, wait! I can figure this out… so, Usopp and Kaya are obviously each other's crush, as are Vivi and me. Sanji has a crush on all the girls in this circle…”

She sighs as Sanji flushes red, babbling in agreement. 

“Chopper has been infatuated with Robin since he met her–” Chopper squeaks, and Robin smiles sweetly at him. “Barto has had a weird thing for Luffy since forever, platonic or not…”

Barto just shrugs as Luffy laughs out loud, and you begin to sweat. Damn Nami! Is she a sleuth, or just a witch, as Zoro calls her? She's got dirt on everyone! 

“Now I'm actually curious about these two…” Her gaze sends hot flashes through your neck and up your face. Zoro seems unaffected, though, at least from what you can tell from the corner of your eye, since you refuse to look straight at him. “Who's your crush, Zoro?”

Zoro grunts, you stifle a squeak, and Nami beams.  

“Is it Sanji?” She begins, earning an outraged cry of ‘sacrilège’ from the blond and a curse from Zoro. “Or maybe…”

“Just drop it, Witch.”

“What if I don't want to?”

They both stare intently at each other before Vivi places her hand on Nami's and she relents. “Fine, I have another anyway.”

“It's not your turn, Witch.”

“Never have I ever let someone drink from my prized bottle of sake.”

“Witch…”

You start to sink lower into your seat as Nami remains relentless in her teasing. What is she trying to accomplish? Embarrass you to death? Because it's working. 

“Or maybe, never have I ever had a crush on someone since high–”

“Blergh!”

Chopper suddenly throws up into the fire pit, startling everyone and putting an end to whatever was going on between Nami and Zoro, as everyone rallies to help poor - not-used-to-drinking-at-all - Chopper. 

Zoro sighs on your left and takes two sips of his drink before getting up to help Chopper. 

-*-

“This was so fun. Thank you guys for having me.” You smile at Nami while Luffy hugs you for the tenth time in a row. He’s already made you promise to return next weekend since, apparently, they have gatherings like this almost every weekend. 

You say another goodbye and turn around, looking for Zoro to give him back his jacket, but he appears next to you before you can call out to him, hands in his pockets and his usual scowl in place. “Let’s go, Trouble.”

Tilting your head, you raise your brow. “What?”

“I’m walking you home. We just got you back. You think I’m going to let you fall into a dark abyss, a cliff, or, God forbid, a large pothole, just because you can’t see what’s in front of you?”

If looks could kill, Zoro would be squirming on the floor. “You’re terrible.”

“And you’re terribly impaired to walk safely home. Let’s go.” His tone leaves no room for argument, but, truth be told, there was none to have anyway. Once again, you find yourself craving more of Zoro’s company, more of your quips and jabs, more of your back and forth.

Is it flirting? Is it just banter?

Whatever it is, it makes you happy. 

Your house isn’t that far from Luffy’s new home, but the night is pitch black and there’s barely any light along the way. You’re secretly glad Zoro is walking home with you because, once again, you feel that weird prickling in your neck, a shiver that doesn’t come from the cold, but from a deep unease, and you don’t know why.

The silence surrounding you is quite comfortable, and it’s only broken by Zoro’s grunts and mumbles of ‘careful’, or ‘watch it’ as he steers you away from trouble, something you attract without even meaning to. 

“How are you feeling, Trouble?” He finally asks, a lightness to his tone, almost like he knows what you’ll answer.

“I know what you want me to say.” You tease and bump his shoulder, barely making him budge but getting your point across.

“Then just rip the band-aid off. Say it.”

“Nope.” You stretch the ‘p’, and shake your head, skipping two steps ahead, away from his reach.

“Is it so hard to admit, Trouble?”

“Hmm, hmm!” You mumble, ears turning bright red as you turn to him and walk backwards, making him curse and reach out to you with another warning of ‘careful’, like he’s constantly watching your step, afraid you’ll fall and hurt yourself. “Fineeeeee!” You roll your eyes and turn forward, making him sigh in relief. “You were right…”

“I barely heard you.”

“You were right, Zoro! I had fun, I didn’t feel left out! There!” You give him what he wants just as you reach the steps of your porch. The darkness of the night finally illuminated by the weak light of the door lamp. 

“Was that so hard?” He asks as you climb the steps with harsher stomps than necessary and hear him chuckle behind you. 

“No…” The words leaving your lips are barely a mumble.

“I can’t hear you.”

Instead of climbing another step, you turn, ready to tell him again, louder and angrier this time, but he’s right there, a few breaths away, and you can almost feel his heat against you.

“I…” The words get caught in your throat as you stare down at him. Zoro is standing two steps below you, making you slightly taller than him. His eye is staring right at your lips, and you gasp. “You…”

He climbs another step, and you hold your breath. He’s at eye level now and you feel like leaning in. It’s just a peck, how wrong can that be?

Is it because of the alcohol you’ve been drinking? Maybe… Or maybe it’s just because you and Zoro are attracted like magnets. He’s drawn to you as much as trouble is…

Wait…

Perhaps Zoro is trouble…?

“You were saying?” His breath feels hot against your lips, and you can feel the ghost of his touch against your waist, where his hand lingers, not touching yet, but inching closer by the second.

“I…” What were you saying? Maybe there’s nothing to be said… 

Your eyes drop to his lips and you lick yours slowly. Zoro releases a soft grunt and leans. 

It’s happening.

You can almost taste the sake on Zoro’s tongue, you’re so close… so close…

BANG!

You gasp and pull back, startled by the loud noise coming from the barn. Zoro’s hand shoots to his back, where he probably has a gun, and he looks around, alarmed. 

“Get inside.”

“But–”

“Now!”

You don’t make him repeat it, and fumbling with your keys, you enter the house and close the door with the loudest click ever before drawing the curtains to keep an eye on Zoro. He only moves after he makes sure you’re inside the house, and you watch him draw nearer to the barn with carefully measured steps. 

Your heart thrums against your ribcage, and you fight to calm it down. It was already under stress because you and Zoro were about to kiss, but the noise that disrupted the moment almost made it jump out of your chest.

It takes a few minutes - that feel like forever - for Zoro to come back. You quickly open the door, an alarmed look on your face, before he chuckles with a shrug. “It was just the barn door. It was unlatched and banged with the wind. There was nothing inside the barn but scared cows and half-asleep horses.”

You nod, but your face doesn’t relax. “That’s strange, though… I latched the door myself.” You always double-check the latch, lest the animals go off wandering into the night. It happened once when you were younger, and the scolding was so big you never forgot it again. 

“Maybe the gust of wind was so strong it unlatched it on its own?” Zoro tries, and you look at the trees. At the unmoving trees. There’s barely any wind. “Is Mr. S. home?”

You sigh and take the phone out of your pocket. “He sent me a text ten minutes ago saying he was leaving the bar where he went to see the game, so he must be almost home.”

Zoro nods. “I’ll keep you company until he arrives, okay?”

You nod, your eyes still lingering on the barn door as that familiar shiver courses through your spine. Was it really just the wind? 

What wind, though…?

Or did you really forget to latch the door properly?

You never do…

“Oh!” You shed Zoro’s jacket and hand it to him when he climbs the steps to join you. “Your jacket, thank you.” 

Zoro waves his hand. “Keep it. I don’t need it, I’m already hot.”

His line is so ridiculous that it diffuses the tension and gets you giggling. “That was so lame, Zoro.”

“Made you laugh, didn’t it?” Another chuckle leaves your lips as warmth spreads through your chest again, chasing away the lingering fear from the earlier fright. Zoro is so easy to be around. He always was. 

You can’t help but think that, maybe if you hadn’t left town, you and Zoro might’ve been something together. High school sweethearts, perhaps? The kind of couple that gets together early and just knows they are meant to last?

Or perhaps you would’ve just remained friends…

But you still left. And now all the possibilities are opening up again. Are you willing to embrace them, though?

But before the moment builds back up again, Shanks’ car enters the property and you and Zoro sigh at the same time. 

“Your dad’s here. It’s my cue to leave. Take care, Trouble. Stay safe.”

You snort and turn around to open the door again. “Right, I’ll be really careful climbing the steps to my room. Thanks for the tip, officer.” When he doesn’t answer, you turn to see his gaze still lingering on the barn before he says another quick ‘bye’ and goes to talk to your father before leaving.

Tags: @rosidaze @beachaddict48 @armiliadawn @jintaka-hane @sprinkklz @baby5555 @hopelesslover06 @mars-mizuko @sleepykittycx @nerium-lil @eustasscapitankid @ren-ni @jqperi @lycoriskalmia @daydreamer-in-training @iloveyoushanks

|Chapter 3|

[namluvili]

Blue + Red makes Purple. | KNJ ONE SHOT

Just a simple art session with Namjoon, until you get to into it. Blue and Red makes purple right? He’s about to show you.

MDNI!! 18+

word count: no idea i’m to tired..

pairing: f!reader x !namjoon

warnings: smut, sexual use of paint, reader and namjoon make their own painting;) we kinda just go into the smut right away, sorry ;), passionate sex, unsafe sex (pls wrap it). namjoon worships reader like a goddess, not really a warning but still..sloppy sex, degrading, praising, everything. shitty grammar too, to lazy to edit.

enjoy!!

You and Namjoon have these weekly art sessions, you make your own portraits, and you guys have been working on this project for weeks, but what you didn’t know that he was making a portrait of *you*.

You meet up at the daily place you meet at, his apartment of course, and knowing him, of course he has his own art room. All white, paint all over.

You make your way into his apartment while he greets you, shirtless? You aren’t used to this, let alone ever saw how his figure looked..so tall, broad shoulders..long arms-

Ignore it. You are here for painting, that’s it.

“Welcome back Y/N. you know, today is the day we show our projects. I can’t wait to see what yours is.” he says

“Ah yes! I forgot about that already, sorry” you reply, making your way into the art room.

Once you get in, it’s all covered in white, like he just redid it. You look around, while he appears behind you.

“I got rid of all the paint, because i wanna do something big today” He says while turning to the big buckets of red and blue paint.

“You know how blue and red makes purple right? I wanna make it in a different way.” he says.

“Joon? what is this about-“ and boom. he crashes his lips against yours. So slow, so passionate..

You kiss him back, him towering over you, making you back up into the art room.

He tugs at your shirt, “Off.” he moans into your lips, not even giving you time to react to what’s going on.

You take your shirt off, and toss it to the side, same with your pants. just being left in your underwear and bra.

He goes over to the blue bucket and picks it up, and makes his way back over to you.

“This is gonna be cold, i’m gonna pour it over you. Are you ready, Y/N?”

You nod, feeling the cold paint slowly take over your body, shivering at the touch.

He grabs you by your chin, tilts it, and kisses you again. This time, more aggression. His hands start roaming, smothering the paint, making a mess all over the place.

He pulls back and looks at you. “Your so fucking beautiful, i could have paint all over you all day.” He goes over to the red bucket of paint, slowly takes off his pants, picks up the bucket, and pours it on himself.

Coming back over to you, he says “I wanna make this a BIG portrait. I wanna make it personal, something me and you will never regret.”

“Are you sure you really wanna do this? It’s gonna make a mess everywhere joon.” you reply back, dragging your finger over his red abs. seeing a tint of purple in the making.

He doesn’t reply, he just goes on top of you, meaning yes. He collides his body with yours, starting to make the color purple, while kissing you all over.

He makes his way onto your neck, marking you up, also making you moan. He tugs at your bra, making you arch your back so he can take it off.

He stares at your untouched tits, not marked with paint yet. He takes his red hands, and drags them over your nipples. Making you whimper.

“So fucking beautiful.” He whispers, his mouth making its way down to the left red nipple. Teasing it with his tongue and starting to suck.

“Joon.. oh god this feels so fucking good.” You whimper, only getting a chuckle in the response.

Not so long after, his hands find their way to your panties, slowly taking them off. He slowly looks down and says, “God, you’re so fucking wet for me. I can’t wait to make that pussy mine.” As he takes his fingers and makes circles around your clit.

Arching your back off of the floor, he catches your lips in a kiss. Slowly pumping his fingers in and out of your now tinted purple pussy.

“Joon.. I can’t take it.. i need you to fuck me.. please.”

“As you wish.” he replies as he slips off his underwear. And oh my god, he was fucking huge. You weren’t sure if you were gonna make it.

“Don’t worry baby, i’ll make sure you take it like the good slut you are for me. Right?” You gulp.

He slowly positioned himself at your entrance, slowly inserting inch by inch. You wince at the stretch.

Once you both adjusted to the feeling, he starts thrusting at a nice pace.

“Fuck. You’re so tight and wet, i could be inside of you for hours. I could never get tired of this pussy.” He groans, making you even more wetter.

———-After a nice pace, he starts going faster, and even rougher.

Your moaning his name, paint all over the place, the purple color starting to make its way around the room. Pulling at your own hair, nails across his back, starting to make his hair even purple.

“Fuck.. Joon i’m so fucking close.. I can’t make it much longer..”

“Don’t worry baby, i’ll make sure you drag it out. I wanna make you ride this orgasm out.”

He starts going even faster, and eventually his fingers find their way to your clit to rub circles.

“Joon-fuck-“ he cuts you off by covering your mouth.

“Not yet baby, I wanna make this last a little longer, you can hold out for me, right princess? You’re doing so well for me. I know you can hold out.”

Tears start to flow the corners of your eyes, slowly making there way down. You’re screaming into his hand, starting to even grind yourself against him, just to finish yourself off.

“Such a good girl, you’re being so pathetic for me. Grinding yourself against me, just to feel some release baby.. that’s okay.. you can cum now.”

And that snaps the wire inside of you. You cum so hard around him, squirting a bit. You feel him starting to get to his own edge, trying to keep yourself with energy to help him finish.

“Oh god, i’m gonna-“ and there it is. He came inside of you even.

Both of you are panting, covered in dry purple paint.

“I guess purple has a new way of getting created i guess” you chuckle.

“yeah, i’ve been wanting to do that for so long.” he replies.

“So.. about those portraits..does that even count now?”

“No, this was my portrait all along. Seeing you covered in paint, with the smell of sex.”

You giggle, laying your head on his chest, slowly falling asleep.

“No no baby, we have to get washed up. then we can sleep and relax. maybe even go for part 2, that’s if you agree, of course.”

“I definitely wasn’t expecting sex during this session, but i don’t think i’ll ever wanna change the way we do ‘art’.” you say, making your way to the bathroom.

————————————————————————

a/n: i got this inspiration from a song, called pink bubblegum. i just had to write this!! i hope you enjoyed this little drabble from my dirty mind ;)

[jiyongsangel]

Fireside, kwon jiyong

Summary: you and your ex boyfriend, Jiyong, had been hooking up in secret behind your boyfriend’s back however you and your bf are moving to America so this is the last time you’ll hook up with eachother except Jiyongs still in love with you.

Warnings: 18+, minors dni, p in v, blow job, cheating (on your part), mentions of alcohol, toxic relationship, very angsty, no fluff.

A/n: this was kinda rushed and not proofread so my grammars probably bad. Sorry if this is not good I’ve never written proper angst before. I listened to so much mitski while writing this so idk maybe do that too hopefully it will make what I’ve written not as bad.

It was midnight when you slipped into your ex boyfriend’s apartment for the last time. You’d been hooking up with him secretly behind your boyfriend’s back. You didn’t know why but you just couldn’t help yourself, Jiyong was like a magnet pulling you back time and time again despite your relationship ending years ago.

You and Jiyong had a very rocky relationship back then, constantly fighting and it always ended up with Jiyong going out and getting drunk and when he came back? Oh he acted like nothing had happened. It was so toxic so after awhile you packed up and left leaving him behind and since then you’d moved on with your new partner and tommorow you were moving to America with him.

So why were you here? Well you and Jiyong had met again at his listening party for his new album übermensch and hit it off in the bathrooms and since then you’d been doing it often . First it was once a month but now it was at the very least weekly. You felt bad for your boyfriend, Ofcourse you did and that’s why you suggested moving to America with him So you could get away from any temptation and start fresh.

However Jiyong had grown attached, he was always going to be in love with you even if it was unrequited and you just wanted to have lust-driven sex.

You and Jiyong went to his room, the only sound was your uneven breathing echoing through the hallway. You’d told him that you were moving away and he was heartbroken even though he knew you would never properly take him back, deep down he had hoped you would one day.

He gently pushed you back onto his bed, the back of your knees making contact with the silk sheets. You didn’t know how to feel, you’d always love Jiyong but you just couldn’t keep this up not anymore. It was too much, the lying and the secrets and it had to end. You both knew it, you’d said to eachother so many times it would be the last time but it was all broken promises because you both always came crawling back like it was your lifeline

Jiyong climbed on top of you his gaze softly roaming over you before he captured your lips with his. The kiss was gentle, passionate like he was saving every last taste of you. He left soft kisses all down your neck before reaching your bra. He unhooked it swiftly before taking one of your nipples in his mouth his tongue swirling around it while his hand massaged your other breast.

No words were spoken. You didn’t need to because everything he wanted to say was being expressed in the gentle way he was touching you, the way he was handling you like you’d break while also keeping a firm grip like you’d leave too soon.

He removed your panties after he’d removed his and gently slid inside of you. You whimpered, this felt so right and it always would. Jiyong was the one and you knew it but you couldn’t bare to keep stringing him along like an object you only wanted when you craved it the most. And you didn’t want to fall back into your old relationship, you weren’t sure if Jiyong had changed so you didn’t want to put your relationship now on the line for a potentially toxic one.

He pumped in and out of you slow but sensual, He pressed kisses all over your body while doing so. His caresses over your skin were warm, a stark contrast to the coolness of the room.

Eventually he came inside of you, his head falling back as he groaned. He slid out and you took his dick in your mouth licking the left over cum off of his tip which tasted like the bittersweet taste of goodbye.

You made eye contact while you took him in your mouth and you could’ve sworn you saw tears in his eyes. Your heart ached at the sight you and Jiyong were soulmates and it didn’t take much to realise that. You knew you were a fool but you had to let him go.

After you’d both gotten cleaned up, he kissed you passionately. The kiss was full of everything you both wanted to say but were too full of emotion to do so. He led you to the door, the silence was full off pain and the regret you already started to have. As you reached the door he spoke.

“Jagi I’ll wait however long you want me to, months, years I don’t care” he said the pain in his voice oh so evident.

Tears filled your eyes as you looked at him. “Ji, don’t wait you need to let me go.” You said through tears.

He sighed and opened the door as tears were streaking down both of your faces, you turned and looked at him one more time,heart full of regret, before nodding and leaving.

He closed the door behind you and just stood there in the empty, cold hallway. His heart had just broken into a million pieces like a diamond shattering across glass and you’d picked up all the pieces and took them with you.

Comments and reblogs are much appreciated ♡︎

Tags: @sylviavf

Master list

[itskybabes-blog]

Duke Dennis Drabble

Duke Dennis x fem!reader (no face claim but poc!reader friendly)

Part two: The Confession

Disclaimer: this is written by a dyslexic person – please forgive any grammar and spelling errors

TW: swearing, drinking and using derogatory language

Plot: After your big night at an AMP pool part (that you probs won’t remember tomorrow), you finally let your lil’ secret slip.

Word count: 672

ICYMI: part one

“What the fuck am I doing?” You slurred back in confusion. “What the fuck are you doing?”

You rise up from the bed and try to point your finger at him, but stumble forward because you was unaware of your own strength. Duke has to catch you before your pearly whites were scattered all over his floor.

“See, man,” Duke whines with you in his arms, “this is what I’m talking about”.

You move out his arms and squint your eyes at him, trying to focus on all three of him at once.

“Y/N, you can’t stand up straight. You got yourself stupid drunk and started twerking on everyone. Your nipple was fucking hanging out like you’s some fucking whore or sum,” Duke rants.

“Whore?!” – you sober up real quick – “You’re calling me a whore?” you exclaim back, shoving finger quotation marks in his face.

“Meanwhile, you’re here, throwing this stupid party full of thirsty clout-chasing bimbos who only wanna suck your dick, get your Ps and cut! Fucking lodging your tongue down some random girl’s face – you’d be lucky to not have herpes, right now!” You lay into him, using whatever left over competence you have. Dutch courage is certainly real.

“Whore?” You said again, this time with a soft chuckle - which we all know is not good. Duke knows you found nothing funny but couldn’t care because “you’re a fucking embarrassment!”

“Oh my fucking gosh, more fucking names,” you said with a dramatic sigh. You begin to pace around: “What else am I? A slut? A bitch? What else am I, Duke? Tell me!”

You end up in a couple centimetres away from Duke with a face full of fire and push him weakly (pathetically) away from her. His look of disgust softens – maybe he was being a little harsh.

So, he takes the punk move: “You know what, I don’t care. This is not even worth it, man. Fucking drunk!”

That one snapped a heartstring. Duke’s back faces you as he had his hand on the knob.

“You don’t care? You never cared about me, did you?” You come back at him.

“What?” He looked back, utterly confused you’d ever say that.

“You never fucking cared. I’m meant to be someone special to you – your best friend – and you only ever want me around when you don’t have a fuck buddy around. When you need a girl to make you look good when your hotline hoe ain’t picking up,” you start to spew some of your deep feelings.

Duke lets go of the handle and leans against the door. “Y/N, I-“

“You don’t fucking care about me. I fucking hop on a 2-hour flight weekly to see your ass and look all pretty for your stream. Then, you kick me out to entertain a next bitch, passing me off to the rest of the bros like I’m some community hoe. You never fucking cared about me. You never fucking did. You-“

“Are you jealous?” Duke saunters back to you, grinning. His diamond grill playing tricks with your hooded eyes.

“Huh? Where you get that from?” You feel your cheeks burn, turning your head to the side.

“As a friend, you care too much about my roster,” Duke tries to explain. He drops his head to try and make you look him in the eye, but you keep avoiding his accusatory gaze.

“You talking like we fucking or sum,” Duke continues to press you.

“Why would I want you, like, what? Like, that’s- Ha! Ewwww,” you try to act repulsed but you never got an A in drama. Your acting skills are subpar.

“Oh, OK. Just know: I’d drop my roster just for you.”

Your head whips around and look Duke square in his face. A goofy and toothy smile plasters across his face.

“You fucking play too fucking much. You can’t be trying to tease me and shit. Why would I fucking want you? You never cared about me before, why the fuck no-“ Duke’s pillowy lips press intensely on yours.

“Girl, shut up.”

“Yes, sir.”

A/N: here’s the second part! Now, I really hate writing smut so pls forgive me but I’m skipping over that. Pls enjoy this quick update :)

[thatbirdrestaurant]

ʚ fairy tail headcanons ɞ

ʚ these all range from canon-compliant to pure fanfiction lala land ɞ

ʚ this ended up being so much longer than i planned ɞ

ʚɞ

the b team from the gmg hang out regularly and are all very good friends. mirajane, cana, and juvia have special "making fun of laxus" privileges that not even bickslow has.

laxus is genuinely embarrassed about how he used to talk about erza and she uses it against him very often. "oh, yes, because how can i - a mere woman - possibly accomplish this task myself?" "fine! i'll open the pickle jar!"

cain instinct is strong in the fairy tail guild. everyone is resisting the urge to smack each other, and most of them aren't very good at it. even laxus can be a target, especially after he chilled out. the most surprising display was when levy smacked him square in the head with one of her books, and he just yelled at her, or when cana stared at erza for a few seconds before smacking her across the face.

sex education was, probably, the worst thing to happen to those who grew up in the guild hall. either makarov didn't give enough details or he gave way too many.

lucy and gray are the biggest gossipers in the guild. they know everyone's secrets and while they don't blackmail people, they never hide something from the other. if they're staring at you and whispering, they are talking mad shit or they found out something about you.

juvia and natsu get along alarmingly well. they're not even sure how it works, just that they're so different that it kind of makes them perfect for each other (as friends).

natsu is sting's celebrity crush and he thinks he's doing a great job at hiding it. he's not. everyone knows. rogue knows, lector knows, all of sabertooth knows, all of fairy tail knows, sorcerer weekly knows, natsu knows. no one has the heart to tell him.

juvia doesn't have romantic feelings for lyon but she wants them to be friends so badly. not to get closer to gray, just because she thinks he's really cool and easy to talk to. lyon is so smug about it and gray wants to throttle him for it.

erza and mira's rivalry is alive in the tiniest of ways. they're always having small contests like "i bet i can wash this cup faster than you," or "i bet lucy says hi to me first." there's no hard feelings involved, they just can't help but be a little competitive with each other.

erza was illiterate for a really long time, way longer than she should have been, and makarov felt awful for not realizing it sooner. she was just looking at the reward numbers and going with the flow. on top of that, she has really bad dyslexia, something that somehow went under the radar.

related to the previous headcanon, lucy eventually realizes that the reason natsu has such bad grammar and reading comprehension is because he was tutored by erza, and erza's so bad at writing and understanding big words because she has undiagnosed dyslexia. so takes the time to slowly teach them how to read more complicated things, showing erza ways to read with her dyslexia, and giving them handwriting lessons. the first time erza writes a comprehendible letter is to jellal, and she's absolutely ecstatic about it. natsu is thrilled that he can finally read lucy's book without feeling stupid.

gray teaches wendy a lot about social cues and how to survive in a city as big as magnolia. she grew up very sheltered in a tiny village, so it makes sense that she struggles with "big city living." she's very appreciative and gray is just happy he can be of use.

gray stopped smoking because he heard lucy say she finds smokers unattractive. (gray, in the manga, smoked for a bit, and it's explicitly stated that, at least for the first handful of arcs, he was interested in lucy).

natsu started having romantic feelings for lucy during their fight against kain, but he didn't realize he was in love with her until he watched future lucy die. lucy didn't realize she had feelings for natsu until she realized she was in love with him, which was after the events with the eclipse gate. (the specific moments i'm talking about: kain | future lucy | post-eclipse gate)

between her and gajeel, juvia is the older one. she doesn't give it much thought but gajeel sees her in a big sister role, and has found himself accidentally referring to her as his older sister. which he would rather die than let her find out about.

when asked who she would go after if gray wasn't in the picture, most people expect juvia to say she could never picture a world without gray, but she will look you dead in the eye and, without any hesitation, say, "erza."

gray and loke had something very gay going on before loke went back to the celestial spirit world. the sexual tension between the two of them in this scene is too strong, they've fucked, kissed at least.

when gray realized he liked juvia back, he had a full mental breakdown for several reasons. a fear of intimacy, a fear of losing her like he has every single woman he's ever cared about, and because he just couldn't believe her very weird and very aggressive flirting tactics worked.

in the same vein, evergreen was inconsolable for days when she realized she was in love with elfman. laxus, freed, and bickslow have never been more worried about her mental well-being.

all of crime sorciere have a betting pool on when jellal and erza will get their heads out of their asses. they've had to place new bets several times because they're still dancing around each other. at this point, the betting pool is getting tense, and someone is going to lose so much money.

cobra and jellal kissed once because they were both extremely drunk and extremely sad about their respective crushes. neither of them remember it but the rest of crime sorciere can never forget watching cobra shove his tongue down jellal's throat.

makarov has said "you're like the son i never had" way too many times for it to be an accident.

elfman wants to be a girl dad so bad. he absolutely loves having sisters and he's obsessed with the idea of having a daughter to spoil and dote on.

gray and juvia have a kid before getting married...whoops.

going against the grain and literally what mashima has said, and saying that natsu and lucy have a son before having a daughter. he's a lot like lucy while their daughter is almost exactly like natsu.

yukino is a raging lesbian and is endlessly distressed by how many people think she's in love with sting. her month was ruined when minerva congratulated them on their relationship. completely ignoring the fact that sting is a gay man and is openly down bad for rogue.

rufus and orga have been dating for almost three years and literally no one knows.

lucy cried for three hours when she found out about anna and ichiya.

laxus and freed are in a queer-platonic relationship. laxus is aroace and has no interest in being romantically involved with someone, but he likes the dynamics of dating someone, and freed just likes having someone to spoil (back massages, compliments, all the things freed does in canon).

natsu has ended up in so many situations where he's put in feminine clothing, that he's actually started to kind of like it. he really doesn't mind the idea of wearing a skirt or letting lucy do his makeup. lucy is obsessed with it, and they sometimes do each other's makeup.

romeo is a trans boy and canon is my enemy. macao is extremely supportive and is always introducing romeo as enthusiastically as he can. "this is my son, romeo. isn't he so handsome? just the most handsome boy out there. i'm so proud of my son. he's the best." it's as embarrassing as it is endearing.

gray gets really bad joint pain after using his demon slayer magic, because the demon ice is so cold that it hurts him. thankfully, juvia is always happy to give him massages and crack his back.

natsu had the fattest crush on laxus from the age of thirteen to the very end of the battle of fairy tail arc. everyone just thought he had too much faith in his guild mates, but it was actually because he was so horrendously down bad for laxus that he couldn't accept that he was kind of a psycho.

gray tries so hard to seem cool and nonchalant that he accidentally flirts with basically everyone he interacts with. he thinks he's being cool and mysterious, instead he's making people fall in love with him.

loke tells lucy she's beautiful all the way into her sixties, and he means it every single time.

jude, technically, didn't take layla's maiden name, they just had the most unbelievable coincidence in the world where layla's last name was "heartfilia," while jude's was "heartphilia," so neither of them really saw a point in changing their last names.

juvia and gajeel were not only introduced to the wonders of genuine friendship and family after joining fairy tail, but also the amazing world of weed by cana and bickslow. laxus will never forget walking into his apartment with the thunder legion for the first time in years, and being met with juvia, gajeel, and cana on the couch, passing a blunt, while bickslow was raiding the kitchen.

gajeel and levy elope, only bringing lily and juvia with them as their witnesses. lucy was a little (a lot) insulted by it, but she eventually understood why levy did what she did when her and natsu decided to do the exact same thing, and only bring along their team. basically, elfman and evergreen, and gray and juvia are like the only couples to have a ceremony.

fairy tail has a lot of lawsuits and property damage bills, and freed, levy, and lucy almost had collective aneurysms trying to get through and organize them all. the guild has never spent more money on coffee.

lucy eventually takes advantage of the fact she has a very powerful kick and gets a black belt in taekwondo, a type of martial art that focuses mostly on kicking. her raw leg power combined with knowing what she's doing AND her heels? deadly.

(cw for child abuse on this one, skip if needed) minerva has such a massive appetite because jiemma would starve her both as punishment but also to "make her stronger." her body just never feels full, like the food will be taken away from her again.

sabertooth members calling minerva "m'lady" started as a serious thing to show respect, but now it's a running joke where everyone is trying to be as obnoxious as possible with it.

it's kind of implied that rogue is (at least) sexually attracted to minerva, and the fact larcade's "find out who's a virgin" spell hits him right after seeing minerva being affected by it, makes me think he lost his virginity to her. it was awkward and objectively bad but he's still glad it happened. sting drank an entire bottle of tequila when he found out about it.

getting 1 v. 2-d by natsu was the biggest ego crash sting and rogue have ever, and will ever experience. they will never be able to live it down. it will follow them to their graves. please never talk about how egotistical they used to be, they will cry from embarrassment.

minerva calls everyone's boyfriend their "boy toy" because, and i quote, "i don't respect men."

juvia is the best gift giver you will ever meet. she just has a way of always knowing what's perfect for someone, and it's a mutual agreement to always make her go last for gift giving so everyone else feels better about their gift for at least a few minutes.

natsu is the kind of guy to remember something someone said to him once in passing and randomly bring it up weeks or months later. his brain is a library of miniscule information about the people around him.

gajeel talks trash about levy's romance novels but will also be sneaking peeks over her shoulder and trying not to react to various moments. he is deeply invested in the plot twists and the main characters' romance.

while he's traveling, gildarts will buy cana a gift from every town his visits, which results in him having about a pound of knickknacks, clothes, and alcohol for her when he comes back. she pretends to be embarrassed about it but she secretly loves being spoiled by him.

gildarts and cana go on daddy-daughter dates and she'd rather drink bleach than let other people find out about it. gildarts is just happy to be there.

natsu and cana have had this conversation: "so, are we, like, siblings now?" "excuse me?" "because, like, gildarts is basically my dad, and he's your dad. so..." "we are not siblings, natsu." "okay, didn't know you liked being an only child so much." "go fuck yourself."

gildarts knows lucy is going to be his daughter in law. he doesn't know if it's going to be from her marrying natsu or from her marrying cana.

wakaba would sneak teenage gray cigarettes. erza, mirajane, and makarov almost killed him when they found out about it.

mira is aroace, feeling absolutely no romantic attraction and being sex repulsed, but she is absolutely obsessed with other peoples' love lives. she thrives on it.

lisanna is fairy tail's resident lesbian and is a little in love with every girl she meets.

[arinzu]

My Headcannons for Yoichi Isagi, Rin itoshi and Alexis Ness💕

Part 1 l part 2

Might not be accurate

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Yoichi Isagi :

✿He took a photo once of his hair slick back and his fan went absolutely feral.

✿He time to time stalks Rin to observe what he does.

✿Isagi probably stares at the ceiling when he's about to sleep and think about all of the opportunities he missed.

✿If he played any other sports it would be chess, since his vision is great for mental games.

✿Tbh is he was a sin he would be greed/gluttony.

✿If he could ask anything from his parents, it would be to have a little sis.

✿Does skin, body and hair care every few days.

✿Swears in videos games often. Those little brats think they're so gOoD but once isagi finishes his puzzle he'll devour them

✿Tried to hit Kaiser in the head with the ball after a practice match, but Noel Noah was there

✿Gossips with kurona and hiori about kaiser and ness, It's perfect since kurona doesn't know what they're doing but hiori has a lot of dirt on them.

Boyfriend Headcannons💤

♡Plays football w/ u and teaches you by beating you, not even to destroy your self esteem.

♡ such a sweetheart while you are on your menstrual cycle (if you're a girl)

♡ gossip about every teammate with you, like a whole book of players he wants to gossip to you about

♡ once you were sick, he drove to the local store at 2 am just for you. He's so sweet.

♡ Cooks very well like he'll cook food decently

♡ Not that toxic? Maybe that's probably up for debate

♡tells you about his problems like it's the national news to be discuss

♡ Has that romantic playlist he made just for you and him to enjoy.

♡Due to being in blue lock he hasn't texted you often so in return he tries to send gifts every month

♡ Calls you darling and sweetheart multiple times a day

Rin itoshi

✿Drools in his sleep (Me too Rin)

✿I feel like he'll stand awkwardly in a party not even interacting with anyone

✿Is good at cleaning, not barou level but up there

✿Perfect grammar, also TOP at his English

✿Never uses any gen-z/alpha slangs or any type of slang infact

✿Dry ass texter...

✿Gets really weirded out by any of his THOSE fangirls/fanboys... Like wdym you wanna have the reproduction LIKE HE'S ONLY 16

✿Knows knife play at some point, don't ask him why (he doesn't know)

✿Artistic in secret... Like he'll paint the beach or anything that shows the happy times of him and sae

✿Gets nightmares of that day... (Pretty sure everyone has that headcannon by now)

Boyfriend Headcannons💤

♡Cuddles every time he gets a chance with you. That kinda prevents him from getting those dreams....

♡ even if he's not as romantic as the others, you guys still go on weekly dates and THEY are expensive or just casual date like movie date🫶

♡After getting traumatized by sae, he almost broke up with you, Thank goodness, that you manage to make him snap out of it.

♡ After getting convinced by your and his parents he went to couple counseling and saw his mistakes

♡One of his favorite things to do with you is Playing football, I mean two things he loves in one? Count him in!

♡ Bring extra clothes with him whenever you're around, just in case it gets cold and he doesn't need to give you his hoodie.

♡Does not have much of a soft spot for you BUT, his eyes sparkle whenever he sees you like the good old times

♡ Almost made you cry when you both were on a movie date, it was those scary ahh movies that you don't know what's coming next.

♡Has a separate Love notebook from his early days of middle school that he reads when he misses you.

♡Calls you lukewarm as a word of affection when he sees you

Alexis ness

✿Would probably be in good terms with isagi if it didn't end like this

✿Has a mental breakdown every few days because of kaiser paying too much attention to isagi

✿Makes Kaiser a birthday cake every year and even bought him EXPENSIVE stuff from his hometown

✿Keeps the magician outfit he had when he was just a child, he cherish it like it's the most valuable thing in the whole universe

✿Would be friends w/ Charles if they interacted more, I mean like opposite friends, Ya'k

✿If richer than his awful siblings back home, if not then... It's because of the plot.

✿If he didn't met kaiser he'll probably be better than what he is now.

✿Has surprisingly good fashion taste, It's better than most blue lockers I can tell you

✿Has that changing color book lamp at the side of his bed he use when he's upset or just sad

✿He would like science if it weren't for the fact of his childhood

Boyfriend Headcannons 💕

♡Is actually quite the gentleman to you and your family members, since he a very toxic household

♡Always makes your favorite dish, if he doesn't know the recipes he'll find it by your guardian/ by how you like it.

♡Gives you a lot of gifts, I MEAN A LOT like everyday you'll find things that you enjoy at your doorstep

♡Due to being away from blue lock, he gets awfully jealous of the boys around you. Even if it's just a friend

♡Husband material frfr

♡ Punch a dude that was making you uncomfortable, and then ran with you to flee the scene.

♡Prefers the value of affection than the materialistic value of a gift you give him

♡ Loves being the small spoon but if you want, he can be the big spoon, anything for his precious angel.

♡Yandere tendency!!! Whether a girl or boy, he will get jealous if you spend more attention on them than him!

♡Call you angel or any kind of German words of affection, he will use it

That's it y'all💋

Thank you for reading this! It too me longer than expected!

So thank you for staying till the end even tho it was just 3 blue lock characters!

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