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swordgrace · 10 months ago

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❝ 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐖𝐄𝐄𝐓 𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐁𝐔𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆. ❞

KINKTOBER WEEK TWO.

⤿ pairing(s): halbrand!sauron x fem!human!reader.

⤿ word count: 4.6K.

⤿ warnings: smut (mdni), porn without plot, mild manipulation (it’s sauron), risk of getting caught, possessiveness, sex in a public location, fingering (fem!rec), heavy kissing, hair-pulling, scratching, begging, unprotected sex, p in v sex, breeding kink if you squint, sex on a table.

⤿ note: first time writing for sauron, please be gentle! mr. tolkien, so sorry for all of the despicable things I’m gonna be writing about your characters. ❤️ thank you all for reading! reblogs & comments are appreciated!

A salt-tinged breeze stirred through the forges, a welcome gust of relief amidst the heat that sought to blaze his flesh asunder.

In the silence of dusk, Halbrand found his solace with hammer and anvil, over that of indulgence of drink at some tavern.

Númenor proved to be the respite he desperately needed, running from a shadowed past. He worked tirelessly, through lengthy days and well into the night, his mind a tumultuous tempest.

The King of the Southlands — the ruler of nothing.

It was a mantle that wholly disinterested him, and despite his numerous protests to Galadriel regarding his supposed heritage, the she-elf refused to let it stay dead and buried. He was better off here, crafting works of art — blades, armor, jewelry.

There was nothing for him now, only threads of a plan that seemed to fall by the wayside. It was easy to disappear here, to fade away into the backdrop of the oceanside kingdom, allow himself to place all his efforts on smithing.

The roaring embers of the forge sizzled as he placed the partially-finished blade inside, molding metal to his skilled hand. There was no greater joy than that of creation — making something out of nothing, a tool to be used.

Halbrand’s gaze momentarily flickered toward the roll of parchment sitting along one of the many craftsmen’s tables.

You were an envoy of Númenor, the brood of a lesser House of Men, in-service to the Guild. It was you that had uncovered records of the Southlander line and brought it to Galadriel’s attention — a clever creature, you were.

In what handful of interactions he’d had with you, you were studious and well-mannered, far too intelligent for your station. You toiled in-service to lesser beings, when your potential extended far beyond their reach.

The scroll contained the very bloodline you had presumed he hailed from, as if you were dangling the proof for all to see. He cared little for it, preoccupied with the task at-hand.

If it were his choice, he preferred to stay in Númenor, learn their customs and assimilate into their culture. Galadriel’s stubbornness had the potential to win out if he weren’t careful, and Halbrand was not the subservient sort.

In the star-riddled dusk, Halbrand decided to break in his crafting, stepping toward a basin of water, letting the cool liquid wash away the perspiration dotting his brow.

It was better at twilight, offering a solace that one might not fully understand. He rarely slept, and when he did, he was often plagued by dreams of constant rage. Halbrand let the forge simmer down, opting to work on the still-hot sword.

A gentle tap of knuckles against the door did not alert him as much as you thought it would. He stood with his back to you, brows furrowed together in concentration. “To what do I owe the pleasure?” He questioned.

Greeted by the stifling, ember-fueled heat of the forge, you stood in the doorway, having abandoned your Guild regalia. “Good eve,” You mustered a smile, hands twisting together. “You are a stranger to rest, it seems.”

“As are you,” Halbrand’s steely gaze flickered from the blade to you, letting the hammer swing down upon forming steel. “Is it safe for you to be wandering about at nightfall?”

His sharp inquiry brought you pause, fingers idly toying with the fabric of your dress. Númenor was perfectly safe — safer than most kingdoms of Men. “Should it not be safe?” Countering his remark, you observed the rack of newly-crafted swords.

Halbrand did not offer an answer right away, turning the blade over, striking it again with his hammer as sparks flew. “There is no such thing as true safety, my Lady. There will always be something stirring in the shadows.”

You nearly laughed at his fearmongering — he sounded akin to an old maiden, weaving her intricate tales of fright to dissuade children from wrongdoing. “That is a rather dour sentiment. Are you often paranoid?” Your tone tapered off into one of mild amusement.

A sardonic scoff escaped him, lips quirking up only slightly, yet he did not seem offended by your retort. “Merely concerned with preservation — my own, first and foremost.” He replied.

He knew why you were here, even if it was an unspoken thing that you continued to dance around. You had come as a messenger on behalf of Galadriel, to make a valiant attempt of convincing him to return to Middle-Earth.

“The Guild is impressed by your craft,” Shifting the topic, you brushed your fingers over the horse-shaped pommel, the color of ivory. “Not that I should be divulging that information.” You mused.

Perplexed, Halbrand wordlessly observed you, cerulean hues studying the creases of your dress, a shade of mauve that only seemed to enhance your beauty. There was something forlorn simmering within him, feelings not often brought to the surface.

“Is that so? It seems that they’ve finally come to their senses,” He jested, earning a pointed look from you. “It took a beating to do so.” Halbrand placed the unfinished blade beside the dying embers of the forge.

There was still mild bruising around his nose and mouth, heated transgressions that earned him the ire of Númenor. He seemed unperturbed, seizing a rag from the edge of an anvil.

“That could’ve been avoided,” You murmured, tracing a digit around the ivory head of a horse before stepping away. “You are fortunate that they did not toss you into the seas for your rancor.”

“That would be rather unfortunate, being tossed back into the ocean when I had worked tirelessly to claw my way out of it.” He quipped, moving about the forge as he hung up his tools.

A soft sigh escaped you as you shook your head, peering outside towards the night skies. “If you wish to stay in Númenor, you must cease drawing attention to yourself.”

Halbrand chuckled, the sound devoid of any mirth. It was a steely sound, more sardonic than genuine. He wiped away at the soot and grime of the forge, leaning back against the sturdy table.

“Is this amusing to you, being tossed into a cell and brawling with the locals?” The sharp bite of your inquiry could’ve been mistaken for the edge of a knife. “You are above that.”

“And if I am not?” He was equally as sharp, that of a longsword, tarnished and worn yet still able to cut with ease. Halbrand’s countenance seemed unmistakably soured by your comment.

Taken aback, you turned to face him fully, canting your head to one side. It was not mock frustration that you found in his features — it was true. “What do you mean?”

“You continue to place me upon some pedestal,” Halbrand scoffed, peering elsewhere, gazing at the hot coals of the forge. “What if I am not what you think me to be? What if I am simply a Man with not a drop of nobility to his name?”

With a furrowed brow, you folded your hands together, studying his visage. He seemed frustrated yet forlorn, as if he were remembering something — lamenting, perhaps. “Then you are a Man.”

In the time that you had gotten to know Halbrand, standing alongside Captain Elendil on the ship back to Númenor, he was something of an enigma. Charming and charismatic with a great love of disobedience, but he possessed a veiled depth.

Galadriel seemed far more preoccupied with returning to Middle-Earth and hunting Sauron, making Halbrand a ruler over considering his feelings. If he wanted to stay in Númenor, craft a new existence — you did not blame him.

“And if I am not the man that you believe I am?” Halbrand pressed, as if seeking a certain answer from you. Some sliver of his being wanted someone to tell him that they cared little about his past, what he used to be.

“Whatever you are insinuating, I care little for it. Your past does not make you — only what you do from this moment forward,” You replied, mustering a gentle smile. “You are Halbrand — that is enough for me.”

If the She-elf had it her way, she would drag him back to Middle-Earth, writhing and screaming. In his own web of schemes, it was what was necessary — but time was infinite.

There was a peculiar gleam within your eyes, one that possessed a warmth and understanding that he was vastly unaccustomed to. “Hm,” He sighed, turning the cloth over within his hand. “Thank you.”

A brief laugh tore past your lips, one that seemed to bring the tension to a momentary heel. “What, for dissuading you against further scorn by the local populace?” You mused.

Halbrand happened to chuckle at that, a warm sound that made residence within your stomach, butterflies following suit. “For understanding, for your kindness,” He replied, his tone softening. “Not many possess your tenderness.”

Growing silent, you nodded, attempting to mask the brief glimmer of surprise that fluttered across your features. You were often regarded as level-headed and sage, yet soft when it mattered most.

“I do not wish to see you thrown in a cell again, or exiled from the Guild when you clearly possess a wealth of talent,” Your motives transcended that — part of you liked Halbrand. “I would do the same for anyone in your position.”

“Would you?” Halbrand’s inquiry, whilst outwardly inquisitive, seemed tinged with something unfamiliar — something amorous. Your nerves became set ablaze, skin uncomfortably warm.

As you swallowed the growing lump within your throat, Halbrand straightened, copper-hued locks framing his rugged face. He was handsome — statuesque, clearly carved with the frame of a warrior and a smith.

“Yes,” Hoarse and pitched with the sudden swell of nervousness, you idly toyed with the sleeves of your dress. “If you are to stay in Númenor, I would hope that you only continue to thrive with your craft.”

This craft was of little interest — Halbrand knew what he wanted, starting with you. Malleable like the finest metal, as beautiful as a glittering opal socketed into that of a signet.

“Is that what you want, for me to stay in Númenor?” Seas help you — this was madness. Halbrand’s poignant question made you wonder what exactly was about to happen, gooseflesh icing your spine, prompting you to shiver.

“What I want matters little,” There was a noticeable lack of conviction within your tone, as if you were convincing yourself of that very fact. “You are free to choose your destiny.”

You were fighting against the urge, the untoward craving that began to settle within your bones. It wasn’t proper nor appropriate of you to even consider wanting Halbrand, a man whose fate seemed far more important than your own.

To ask him to stay in Númenor, abandon the Southlands — you did not have the heart. It was born of greed and desire, wanting to keep him close to your chest.

“It matters to me,” Halbrand murmured, brows creasing together as he glowered down upon you, close enough to touch. “What do you want?” The malignant force deep within him begged to bring you into his stead.

Whatever perceived darkness hungered within you, it also screamed within him, with a shadow far more powerful than your own. Greed was unbecoming of you — you were meant to serve the people of Númenor, never yourself.

Whereas Galadriel possessed a fierce heart and unending thirst for vengeance, you longed to be free — no longer under the thumb of lesser Men, to lead and to be revered.

To be loved, to be coveted.

“Do not leave,” A plea, beseeching him to stay in Númenor, to stoke whatever flame was stirring between the both of you. The intensity of his longing stare nearly made you collapse. “Stay here, in Númenor.”

A hitch formed within your throat as his calloused fingertips graced your arm, tracing over the sea of mauve gossamer that clung to your form. Halbrand took your silence as something contemplative, afraid to make your true feelings known.

Again, he pressed closer, looming above you, caging you in against the table. You could feel his heat, smell the coal and metal, taste the fantasy that swirled within your mind’s eye.

Roughened digits caressed across your throat, over your slender neck, your collarbone. His touch was like that of a fire, a burn so wonderful that you would beg for it if you had to.

“Halbrand,” Barely above a whisper, your tone seemed strained, as if fighting against all of your baser urges. A peculiar heat raked its way across your flesh before settling within the pit of your belly. “I shouldn’t.”

“Do you think that you are the only one who possesses desire?” His wanton confession made your knees buckle, lips parting just enough for a soft gasp to escape you. “When my eyes found you upon that ship, I wanted — more than I have for some time.”

Words turned to ash upon your tongue, dying then and there within your throat. There was a fire within Halbrand’s eyes, one that sought to burn you, too. You felt the small of your back dig into the table, warmth licking across your spine.

Each breath felt labored, a dizzying sensation taking hold of you, as if this were more dream than reality. Yet, Halbrand remained close to you, chest-to-chest, digits finding the swell of your hip through the sea of violet fabric.

Instead of vocalizing your festering worry, you rocked up upon your toes, pressing your lips against his own. It was disarmingly gentle, a sheepish kiss that did not waste a second in becoming heated and charged.

He reciprocated with a blinding intensity, arm hitching around your waist, calloused palm spreading out against your back. Halbrand lifted you closer, his kiss inherently greedy and covetous, as if you belonged only to him.

His mouth swirled with wildfire, tasting of smoke and a hint of Númenorian stout, stubble scratching against your soft skin. Your hands found their purchase against his chest, able to feel the taut muscle beneath.

Hardened was a good way to describe him — rugged like the uneven ridges of tanned leather, swathed in heat. He cupped your jaw with his hand, reveling in the sensation of your flesh, akin to a plane of silk.

The state of dishevelment he was in mattered little to you — the soot upon his tanned flesh, the specks of dirt, garb somewhat tattered. You could not recall the last time you had yearned for someone so terribly that it ripped your heart into two.

Each clash of your lips evoked a pang of excitement that struck at your stomach, exhilaration pumping through your veins. Halbrand was a vigorous kisser — passionate and swift, stealing the air from your very lungs.

His palm slowly caressed from the small of your back toward your derrière, strong digits melding themselves into your clothed flesh. A hitch formed within your throat, anticipation mounting as the tension began to cloud the room.

Your digits possessed a mind of their own, climbing towards the nape of his neck, threading themselves through his bronze tresses. Halbrand kissed you again — softer this time, yet not without his domineering edge.

Lips bled into one another with an outpouring of want, a long-repressed sentiment caged within both hearts. Halbrand wanted many things — yet, what he did not expect was to crawl after you like some starving beast.

Every sensible thought seemed mulled, draped in this haze that clouded your mind. As you slowly recoiled from the kiss, you keened into the rough embrace of his palm, his digits cupping your cheek.

As much as you longed to continue, the locale seemed impractical, if not somewhat reckless. If someone were to catch you, you would never hear the end of it. Even then, you did not want to let fear drive you this way.

“Must I profess my desire once more?” Halbrand murmured, warm breath fanning across your visage, tinged with smoke. There was something tantalizing and enigmatic about him, swirling with some edge of mystique.

“I wouldn’t protest,” You whispered, which earned you the beginnings of a smile. He swept your tresses aside, bearing your neck to him as he bent in to kiss the soft flesh there. “Halbrand.” A low whine escaped you.

Stubble prickled and bit at your neck, yet you reveled in it, clutching at his shoulder as he pressed heated kisses to your throat. He was not hesitant in the slightest, letting you writhe and moan, plead for him to continue.

It was then that he began to gather your dress with one hand, firmly gripping at the mauve fabric as he inched it upward. Exhilaration struck at you again, the buzz of excitement, a thrill that you hadn’t experienced before.

There was not an inkling of hesitation from you, with little sign of stopping his advances. As he guided the gossamer along your legs, one palm snaked forth, calloused digits embracing your thigh, as smooth as silk.

He held little recollection of the last time he had touched something so delicate, as if you were some splendid jewel to be cradled, coveted. Halbrand kissed his way toward the curve of your jaw, searching your visage for a reaction.

As he parted your legs with his frame alone, your breath hitched, an audible noise that he found to be delicious. You were akin to some startled rabbit, ensnared within the jaws of a predator disguised as a friend.

Whatever smallclothes you wore beneath were of little consequence, giving way to that of his possessive embrace. Your hand flew back to grip the edge of the table, nails digging into splintered wood as he sought the heat between your legs.

Anticipation swelled within you, teetering on the edge of unraveling as you felt his digits ghost across your aching cunt. It was feather-light, intended to torment you — and torment it did.

“Halbrand,” A desperate gasp tore past your lips, needing him in a way that you hadn’t desired anyone else before. “Please, please touch me.” Your breathy pleas did not go unheard as he planted a kiss against your neck.

“Is that what you want?” A sultry purr rumbled from the depths of his chest, tone adopting a rather promiscuous resonance. He watched you nod several times over, fingers pushing past your petals as he touched your core.

A hand held onto his bicep for stability, the other haplessly fisting at the wood behind you. A moan emanated from you, desperate for anything he would give you.

Much to his delight, he found that you were shamelessly wet between your thighs, a nectar that refused to cease. “You are beautiful like this.” He murmured, fingers toying with your slit, eliciting another strangled moan from your lips.

Halbrand’s forehead brushed against yours, hawkish gaze absorbing the look of pleasure upon your face. He began to find a steady rhythm, worn digits sliding along the length of your cunt, letting you hold onto him as much as you pleased.

Any scrap of friction you received drove you mad, desperation climbing to new heights as your hips rocked forward into his hand. His stare became half-lidded, drinking you in with unabashed greed, longing to consume you.

Sighs of wanton passion drifted from you in droves, legs parted as he pressed his thumb to the pearl of your cunt. It was easy to evoke a reaction from you, the constant writhing, gasps and whines, the look of complete and utter bliss.

In sluggish circles, he caressed your clit, causing you to twitch again. “Halbrand,” A moan tore past your lips again, his name becoming a melody from your mouth, to be sung over and over again. “Do not stop, I beg you!”

“As you wish.” Halbrand’s voice raked hot embers over your body, reaching a salacious octave that turned your insides to molten liquid. He continued to touch your nethers, two digits sweeping toward your entrance.

An impenetrable heat swallowed your body whole, skin feeling damp with perspiration, somewhat in-part of the forge’s dissipating warmth. He continued to circle your clit, fingers lightly prodding at your cunt in an attempt to seek entry.

Rough lips fell to your neck again, gowns having slacked enough to give way to your shoulder and collarbone. You clawed at his bicep, rolling your hips again as you rocked yourself upon his digits, much to his delight.

With a brusque tug upon the collar of his tunic, your lips clamored for his, longing to feel his mouth. His kiss left you breathless, teeth scraping against your lower lip, bringing you to heel.

Heat pooled between your legs, coalescing upon Halbrand’s fingers as he teased your core, thumb working around the pearl of your cunt. A soft gasp tore through your throat, a moan escaping you into the passion of your kiss.

Again, your hips rolled into his hand, craving him in a way that resembled that of an animal; carnal, ravenous. A fire danced within his eyes, one that seemed to reflect the sentiments that festered within you.

“Give yourself to me.” Halbrand sighed, timbre trembling against the underside of your jaw before he looked upon you, unraveling from his touch. Need stirred within him, coupled with the swell of possessiveness.

He searched your countenance for any hint of hesitation, flicking his thumb across your clit once more. “Please.” You pleaded, waves of bliss rolling across your body, bringing with it a feverish heat that made you want him all the more.

Halbrand heeded your breathy plea, reaching for the leather ties of his trousers, wanting nothing more than you be inside of you. His cock twitched with amorous intent, muscles coiled, prepared to grab you.

His hand recoiled, leaving you with an aching emptiness that caused your cunt to clench pathetically around nothing. A hitch formed within your throat, words turning to ash as he lifted you onto the table.

Calloused, careworn palms kneaded into your haunches, grasping at your pliant flesh in fistfuls as he pressed his lips to your exposed shoulder. Rucking your gown up to your hips, Halbrand appraised you with a thinly-veiled lust.

There was no flesh as soft as yours, untouched — belonging to him. Anticipation churned within the pit of your stomach, lips agape as he unraveled the front of his breeches, freeing himself from its confines.

Flushed with a rush of ecstasy, Halbrand dragged you closer, hands traveling to cup your hips. He guided his length to your cunt, letting the tip of his cock linger there until he pushed forward.

“Halbrand!” You moaned, hand reaching to grasp at the nape of his neck, nails raking across his coppery tresses. The other seized his bicep, digging inward as he slowly rocked into you.

Nearly chest-to-chest, there was little room for discomfort, letting lust and urgency guide his hand. He huffed, steadying his ironclad hold upon your hips, fingers pressing hard enough to leave behind bruises.

His pace was agonizingly sluggish at first, drawing out each thrust in an effort to let you grow accustomed. Hot sighs of passion fluttered between the both of you, lips brushing over one another as he rolled his hips forward.

There was something exhilarating about coupling with you, the warmth of being alive, savoring the guise of mortality. Halbrand could see the attachment brewing within your stare, the glint of affection intermingled with desire.

The still-burning coals of the forge provided enough illumination for him to see you bathed in fire — and you were breathtaking.

Your heart pounded within your ribcage, so powerful that you thought it might burst through. His stubble scratched against your cheek, providing a pleasant burn that let you know that this was reality. “Move,” You moaned. “Please.”

Inclined to obey, Halbrand let his yearning for you show, as plain as a summer’s day. He began to thrust into you, hunching in and over, stabilizing himself with one palm flat atop the table.

The other squeezed incessantly at your hips, cock rocking in and out of you at a steady pace, yet the fervor was steadily increasing. Your head spun, clouded by lust as your paramour ravished you in the way that you deserved.

His countenance echoed your sentiments, shadowed with the haze of lust, a carnality that clawed at your very soul. You let your forehead press to his, brows screwed together in a state of bliss, grasping at his tresses.

Halbrand grunted, the low noise rippling through his chest as he held your thigh, digits clamping down to keep you firmly in-place. His cock throbbed with an ache of urgency, hips snapping forward as he filled you completely.

A moan erupted from your lips yet again, nails forming crimson crescents against his bicep, occasionally lurching forward to meet his thrusts halfway. His pace became somewhat erratic as he coaxed you to lay back.

Your back hit the wooden surface of the table, the uncomfortable bite of it all softened by parts of your dress. Halbrand hunched in over you like a wolf towering above prey, palm flat beside your head.

The groan of sturdy wood beneath your entangled bodies resonated throughout the forge, the heat beginning to dissipate. The warmth between breath and body kept you feeling feverish, and you hitched one leg around his hips.

It evoked another growl from his lips as the smith pounded away at you, keeping a firm and steady pace. Halbrand was rougher than some, but never enough to cause you discomfort or harm. He was invigorated, driven to madness by the sight of you.

He kissed you again, feeling your desperation through joined lips alone, your hand grasping at his toned forearm. Arousal mounted within you, as thick as honey oozing between your thighs.

Passion bled into need, the two tangling together into some fervent amalgamation. It showed in his movements, continuing to thrust into you, feeling your cunt clench around him. You were made for him, with a heart that he found as malleable as metal.

The arch of your back signaled that your release was swiftly approaching, keening into his embrace instead as you moaned. You did little to temper your volume, mouth agape, head rolled back — you were the picture of grace, now tarnished.

His name escaped your tongue like a wayward prayer, over and over again until it was the only word you knew. As his cock hit you again, sending shockwaves throughout your body, you came undone.

Your leg squeezed at his hips, feeling his own resolve crumble at the sight of you, disheveled because of his doing. Halbrand let out a sonorous groan, body nearly blanketed over yours as his cock slapped into you again.

The warmth you provided was enough to make him stay sheathed within you, spilling himself inside of you without thinking. It only served to fuel his possessiveness, as dangerous as a growing wildfire.

Rocking himself inside of you once more, you let out a strangled whine. Through labored pants, you slowly regained composure, feeling his hot breath fan out across your visage.

Halbrand pulled himself out of you, leaving behind the visceral remnants of your lewd exploits, the sheen of it coating the inside of your thighs. He noticed your sheepish expression as you corrected your garments.

“There isn’t anywhere you can go that I would not follow.” He uttered, fingertips tucking strands of hair behind your ear. As you moved from the table, the smith reached for something within the pocket of his trousers.

“Halbrand,” You began, knowing that asking him to stay in Númenor was not fair — to either of you. Perhaps you could enjoy what comfort he brought, for the time being. “I shouldn’t ask it of you.”

“No matter what destiny entails, know that you belong to me.” There was something strangely dark within his tone, disguised as affection — you were oblivious to it. He placed something into your joined hands.

Touched by such a sentimental gesture, you flourished in the aftermath of your coupling, feeling his rough lips press against the curve of your jaw. You shivered, feeling the weight of a trinket within your palm.

Your lips sought his, the kiss lingering, enough for you to feel it burn within your very soul. There was nothing that could describe whatever it was you felt for him, felt with him.

“What is it?” You inquired, warmth raking along your spine, faces brushing against one another. Halbrand lingered pensively, a smile tugging at either corner of his mouth.

“Consider it a gift.”

#halbrand x reader #sauron x reader #annatar x reader #halbrand x you #lord of the rings #rings of power #lotr x reader #the rings of power #rings of power x reader #kinktober #kinktober 2024

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stardustrebels · 6 months ago

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A Heart Like That- A Joel Miller x f!reader one shot

Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader Rating: E/ 18+ MDNI WC: 2.7k

Summary: I really wanted to write a Joel Miller Valentine’s Day story, but couldn’t decide between naughty or nice so I wrote both.

Tags: No Outbreak!AU, established relationship, Joel Miller x f!reader, unprotected PIV, oral sex (f receiving) pet names (darlin’, sugar, baby) soft!Joel for days, fluff & gentle sex. A little bit of worship, a whole lot of care. Minimal descriptions of reader, no use of y/n.

A/N: A little Valentine’s story with a very tired, very soft and very domesticated Joel Miller. PWP but make it sweet. If love isn’t like this, I don’t want it, tbh. 2/2 of my Joel Miller Valentine’s day naughty & nice one shots. Enjoy!

You could say that you had gotten used to it- the way Joel Miller loved you- but that would be a lie.

He was a man of few words, but you didn’t need to hear many. His care for you shone through in his actions; in little gestures that you were sure would have fallen by the wayside the longer you dated him, but after nearly a year together they hadn’t.

He would leave your clothes on the heater for you on cold mornings and set up the coffee machine so that all you had to do was turn it on when you woke up. He kept a mental list of things that you liked, or mentioned in passing; your favourite seasonal flowers, what type of snacks you preferred, books you wanted to read, places you wanted to go. He would surprise you with little trinkets he’d found in your favourite colour, or candles for his place in scents that you loved to make you feel more at home there. He always rested a steadying hand on the small of your back when you walked together and held you close when you climbed in to bed with him after a long day, lulling you to sleep with kind words whispered in to your hair. He would sometimes wake you in the fresh hours of dawn before he left for work, murmuring those same things into the soft skin of your thigh as he pleasured you with a devotion that you had previously never known.

“I gotta treat my girl right” was all he would say with a shrug and a coy smile whenever you brought it up.

You were perfectly capable of taking care of yourself, of course. You both knew that. You had for years before you’d welcomed him in to your life. It was one of the first things that made him fall for you, your independence, but Joel revelled in making life just a little bit easier for you, even when it made things more difficult for himself.

So today, you decided that you wanted to make things easy for him. You weren’t the overly domestic type, but he’d had a long week and you wanted to do something nice. You left work early and stopped by the grocery store on your way to his place to pick up a cute Valentine’s day card and the ingredients to make dinner for him.

You started on dinner as soon as you made it to Joel’s and changed in to some comfy clothes as soon as it was in the oven. The sight of your clothes nestled in against his in the dresser made your heart swoop. You tidied round a little, set the table and set one of Joel’s prized vintage records on the turntable as you waited for him to get home.

You called a hello over the music when you heard the front door close, and he appeared in the threshold of the kitchen with a bouquet of pink roses in one hand and a bottle of wine in the other. His face broke in to a wide smile when he saw you, but it wasn’t quite enough to cover the weariness that sat heavy on his features.

“Hey, baby,” he said, leaning in to kiss you when you padded over to him. “Didn’t think you’d beat me here. Wanted to surprise you with these.”

“Left work early,” you said, accepting the flowers with a smile as he set the wine on the counter. “These are so gorgeous, Joel. Thank you.”

“Gorgeous flowers for my gorgeous lady,” he murmured, winking at you. You beamed up at him before moving to put the flowers in some water.

“Smells good in here,” Joel said, shrugging off his jacket.

“Made us dinner,” you explained, reaching up to the cupboard for some wine glasses. “It’s pretty much ready, I think.”

“You didn’t have to do that, sweetheart, we coulda just ordered takeout or somethin’,” Joel said, watching you fondly.

You shrugged and gestured for him to sit, before turning your attention to the dish in the oven.

“I wanted to do something nice- you do nice things for me all the time.”

Joel shifted awkwardly where he stood and flexed his hands against the back of the chair, but kept his eyes fixed on you. You missed the expression that crossed his face. “That’s different,”

You turned to him with a hand on your hip. “It’s really not. Would you just sit down, Miller? Let me take care of you.”

“Yes ma’am,” he replied, shooting you a lopsided grin before he did as he was told.

Dinner was nice, and you were overjoyed to spend some time with Joel like this. He looked relaxed. Happy. The music from the record player floated through from the other room as a sweet soundtrack to your meal. Joel was as tactile as he always was, his knee bumping against yours affectionately under the table as he complimented your cooking. You both sat and talked for a long while after the food was finished, and only moved when Joel yawned so widely his hand didn’t even cover it.

You cleaned up together, despite your assurances that he could get in to bed and leave you to sort out the mess. Joel had refused and started washing up before you could stop him.

As you dried the last dish, Joel moved to stand behind you, arms caging you in as he peppered kisses to the side of your neck.

“I really love comin’ home to you, y’know.” He said between kisses.

“Oh yeah?” You said, leaning in to his chest.

“Yeah.” He breathed against your ear.

Your stomach flipped as you turned and leaned back against the counter to get a good look at him. His eyes didn’t meet yours- he looked at the floor and took a steadying breath before he spoke again.

“I wondered if… if you’d maybe wanna move in here with me?” He murmured, throwing you an awkward, lopsided smile. “Or find someplace new together? I wanna come home to you every night, darlin’.”

You stared at him, lips parted in surprise. Not because you hadn’t thought about it before. You had. A lot. But you’d never voiced your desires to him, you weren’t sure if he’d felt the same way, and you hadn’t wanted to fuck anything up by asking him.

Hearing Joel say it, seeing how tense he was, bracing himself for your response, made something bloom deep within your chest. Your silence must have stretched on a little too long- Joel exhaled sharply, and his arms dropped to his side giving you a chance to move away if you wanted to.

“Look, I don’t wanna rush anythin’,” he said, the words scraping their way out of his throat, rough under the effort of hiding his disappointment. “Just thought since we’ve been doin’ this a while, and I think you like it here. I figured-”

You cupped his face in your hands, gently tracing your thumbs over the scruff on his jaw, and lifted his head to make him look at you. “Joel.”

The look on his face when his eyes finally met yours made it feel like something was squeezing your heart.

“I’d love to,” you said, smiling up at him so that there was no room for any doubt.

His breath hitched, a sweet little sound you’d only ever heard him make when you were in bed together. “You would?”

You nodded, your smile widening. “Yeah.”

Relief washed over his face, and before you could say anything else, he was kissing you. His hands splayed over your hips, pulling you even closer. Your fingers slid in to the short curls at the nape of his neck, and as you deepened the kiss you felt his shoulders drop as the last of his tension melted away.

The realisation filled you with a sudden yearning. You wanted him to feel it, to understand just how much you wanted this- wanted him.

You tightened your fingers in his hair and he let out a low moan, his fingers sliding down to squeeze the backs of your thighs. You pulled back just enough to catch your breath and rested your forehead against his. He looked so beautiful; dark eyes blown with desire and his lips swollen from your kisses.

“Let’s go to bed, handsome,” you said, taking his hand.

As soon as you’d closed the bedroom door, Joel was on you. He tugged at your clothes, pulling them off with a fervour that suggested he’d suddenly forgotten how tired he was.

When he’d stripped of everything except your underwear, he sat you down on the edge of the bed and stayed close, kneeling between your parted knees and sliding his hands up your thighs, thumbs pressing gentle circles in to your soft skin. He looked up at you from his spot on the floor with an expression so full of adoration it made your head spin.

“You gonna let me take care of you now, sugar?” The want in his voice caused it to crack, and you heard the plea laced through the words.

You nodded, unable to find your own voice as your fingers threaded through his hair again, guiding him down to where he longed to be. He trailed soft open-mouthed kisses up your thigh, pulling a contented sigh from you.

Joel took his time, as he always did when he had you like this. The soft scratch of his beard left a tingling warmth on your skin, and his hands pressed firmly against your legs, holding you open as he nosed against the damp fabric between them, breathing you in like he was savouring something precious.

“You’re so fuckin’ sweet,” he murmured, pressing a kiss over the damp patch before hooking his fingers into the waistband of your underwear and dragging them down your legs.

You barely had time to let out a whimper before he was settling between your thighs pressing his tongue against your aching heat. He groaned at the first taste of you, and it vibrated against your clit so deliciously that you had no choice but to fall back on to the bed, your fingers leaving his hair to clutch at the comforter.

You gasped his name, thighs beginning to tremble in anticipation of his licks. He dragged his tongue over every sensitive spot he knew by heart, fingers digging in to your skin when your hips raised toward his face in a silent request for more.

It was almost unbearable- when he took you apart like this- when he made you feel like nothing else in the world existed except you and him and the pleasure that shot through you, building with every moment.

You bucked your hips again and he groaned against you, pressing his face closer to nudge his nose against your clit as he eased two fingers inside you, curling them just right.

“Fuck- Joel,” you gasped, chest heaving,

“I got you, darlin’. It’s alright, I got you.” He murmured before moving his tongue to flick right over your clit.

He knew exactly how to take you apart. At this point, you’d call him an expert at it with no hint of irony, and as always, it wasn’t long before you were clenching down on his fingers, moaning loudly to the heavens as you came. He hummed against you, a sweet satisfied sound, as he coaxed you through the aftershocks.

“Joel,” you whined, breath catching.

His movements stilled slowly and then he was moving, pressing one last lingering kiss against your thigh before shifting to stand, pulling off his clothes before sliding up your body. His hands bracketed your face as he hovered above you. His eyes were dark and hazy with want, his lips glistening, his breathing uneven.

“Yeah?” He murmured, head tilted in appreciation as he looked down at you . “Need me, sweetheart?”

You nodded, wrapping your arms around his neck, pulling at him until your lips brushed against his, tasting yourself on him. “Always,” you whispered.

A groan rumbled from his chest and he pressed his body flush against yours. You could feel his length hot and heavy, pressing in to your hip as you arched up in to him, desperate for him to be inside you. He pulled back just enough to met your gaze, thumb stroking along your cheek.

And then he was guiding himself to your entrance, sinking in to you with a slow, deliberate thrust, filling you completely.

“Jesus,” he rasped, voice tight as if he was holding on to his control by a thread. “You feel so good, darlin’.”

You let out a low, breathy moan against his jaw, wrapping your legs around his waist to keep him as close as possible. He was so deep, so warm and solid above you, surrounding you, overwhelming every one of your senses. His hand moved to cup the back of your head, tucking it against his shoulder gently as he thrust in to you. He was all around you, all that you could feel and see- overwhelming in the most intoxicating way.

He started to move, rocking his hips slowly, dragging his cock against the spot inside you that made you weak, that left you unable to do anything except press crescent shapes in to his back with your fingernails. He kept his pace unhurried, murmuring words of praise that you could hardly hear over your building moans of pleasure. When you came again it was blinding; the pleasure wracked through you like a wild thing, twitching and clenching at your insides before it subsided in to a rolling wave of fuzziness, rippling through to your toes like TV static. Joel let out a string of curses at how hard you clenched around him, and only increased the speed of his movements when you let out a couple of whimpers as the residual spasms of your orgasm rolled through you.

Joel’s breathing grew heavier, his rhythm faltering somewhat as he chased his own release. He let go of the back of your head to press a rough kiss to your temple as his body started to tremble above you. The way you clenched around him, still pulsing with aftershocks, made his jaw go slack, a deep, broken moan spilling from his lips.

He buried himself deep with a rough, shuddering exhale, body tensing as he came. His face pressed against your neck, breath hot against your skin as he let himself fall apart in you. You could feel the way he softened, how his hold on you turned from something desperate to something grounding, like he needed you there with him more than anything.

Joel shifted just enough to press a soft kiss to your shoulder, his hands smoothing over your body, slow and careful. He never pulled away too fast, never left you feeling empty. Instead, he cupped your cheek, guiding your mouth in to a kiss that was soft and lingering as he pulled out of you.

“You okay, baby?” He murmured, lips brushing against yours as he spoke.

You hummed, nodding sleepily, and he smiled, tracing his thumb along your cheekbone.

“You’re so perfect,” he whispered, pressing another kiss to the side of your face before shifting to pull you against his chest.

You nestled in as he pulled blankets around you both. He always did that, always made sure that you were warm, safe, cared for.

His fingers traced slow, absentminded patterns along your back, his breath deep and steady against the top of your head. The quiet stretched between you, comfortable and warm in your post-orgasm bliss.

“Love you,” you muttered, pressing a soft kiss against his chest. Joel’s arms tightened around you, and when he spoke, his voice was thick with emotion. “Love you too, sweetheart.” His hand found yours beneath the blanket, fingers slotting together with yours in a practised, effortless way. As sleep began to pull you under, you felt it- how deeply he meant it, the depth of your own love for him, and how you didn’t want to spend another day where you didn’t sleep and wake beside him. He was home, and so were you.

#joel miller #joel miller au #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller smut #joel miller fanfic #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x female reader #tlou fanfic #tlou fanfiction #tlou joel

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vigilante-3073 · 11 months ago

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Daddy's Credit Card

Edward Cullen x Female Vampire Reader (Platonic)

Cullen Family x Female Vampire Reader (Platonic)

Summary: Y/N is an entitled brat with the power of mental manipulation. She makes life for the Cullen family a bit more difficult.

TW: Entitlement, mention of death, threats and violence, lack of regard for the feelings/property of others.

Edward Cullen had the unfortunate honor of being considered Y/N's closest friend. This role came with a lot of responsibility as Y/N could be quite impulsive, unpredictable and short-tempered. His ability to read her mind came in particularly useful because it allowed him to stop an idea in its tracks before it could be carried out.

Y/N was the first Vampire that Carlisle was able to create and she fell in love with him during the years they spent together. It had been only the two of them since the early 1800s before he turned Edward in 1918 to be a potential mate for her. Y/N felt like Carlisle was pushing her to the wayside and trying to placate her by introducing Edward.

Y/N harbored quite a bit of disdain for Edward upon meeting him, but eventually came to accept him. She grew resentful towards Carlisle, especially after he introduced Esme into the family and married her soon after. Carlisle tried his best to mend his relationship with Y/N, but it was nothing like it had been all those years ago.

Edward and Y/N were virtually inseparable, but there were no romantic feelings involved. Y/N could be quite possessive of him, but he tried his best to reassure her that he wouldn't abandon her as a friend. As the Cullen family grew, Y/N started to rebel against Carlisle and push back against some of the rules he had set, especially about using her powers.

Carlisle tended to let her get away with almost everything, as long as no one was harmed. He had been dealing with her outbursts for hundreds of years and was understandably exasperated. Carlisle's hands-off parenting approach with Y/N was most likely the reason that Edward was in his current predicament.

Y/N had "borrowed" Carlisle's credit card and had completely disappeared for almost two months before returning to the Cullen home with a brand new black Camaro and too many shopping bags to count.

The week before her disappearance, Edward had caught one of her ideas before it was able to snowball into a very expensive trip to Las Vegas on Carlisle's dime. He could only imagine what she had come up with instead.

Carlisle welcomed her back into the home with open arms, not daring to ask her where she had been. Edward couldn't stand her continuing sense of entitlement, but he was honestly impressed by how creative she could get with her rebellious behavior.

Y/N walked up the stairs, lifting her sunglasses up onto her head as she made her way into Edward's room.

"Get up, we're going hunting," She said.

"I have school in an hour," Edward stated, closing his book and setting it aside.

Y/N scoffed, taking her sunglasses off and tossing them onto his desk. Y/N had become indifferent to high school over the years and Edward couldn't blame her.

"Where were you?" Edward asked, Y/N shrugged, "Everywhere... Europe, mainly," She said.

"How much of Carlisle's money did you spend?" Edward questioned.

"Not nearly enough. Get up," She said. Edward clenched his jaw as he stood up from the couch without any intention of doing it.

"I hate it when you do that," He muttered, shaking his head.

"Come hunting with me," Y/N repeated.

"I'll get you one deer, then I have to go," Edward bargained, "Deal," Y/N replied.

...

Edward rode to school in the passenger seat of Y/N's new car, "I met someone while you were gone," He stated.

"You should know that you don't have room in your life for anyone besides me," Y/N replied without looking at him.

Edward huffed a laugh, "You aren't even here half the time," He said.

"Doesn't matter. I don't share my things," Y/N stated, driving up into the parking lot of the school.

"I don't belong to you," Edward said.

Although it was true that Carlisle had saved him with the intention of creating a companion for Y/N, their relationship tended to be one sided. Edward was expected to be available to her at all times for whatever she may need, but the same standards didn't apply to her.

Y/N could disappear for years and would still expect Edward to be waiting for her upon her return like a loyal lap dog.

"You can keep thinking that all you want," She said, pulling into a parking spot beside Rosalie's car before putting the car in park and shutting off the engine.

Y/N reached for the door handle, "Wait," Edward said, she looked over at him, "I haven't asked you for many things in the time that we've known each other, but I'm serious about this person and I would appreciate your support in this," Edward said.

"Is she human?" Y/N asked.

Edward nodded, "Her name is Bella," He said.

"I don't care what her name is, Edward. This relationship is not going to continue," Y/N stated.

"She already knows about us," Edward said.

"You told her?" Y/N questioned.

"No, she figured it out herself," He replied.

"This shouldn't even be a conversation," Y/N scoffed.

"Bella has met the family and they accept our relationship... I'm in love with her, Y/N," Edward said.

"This is ridiculous," Y/N snapped, opening the door and getting out of the car. She slammed the door as hard as she possibly could have without shattering the window.

Edward sighed, resting his head back on the seat behind him before reluctantly stepping out of the car and making his way into the building.

...

Bella jumped as he locker was suddenly slammed shut. Her heart pounded in her chest as she looked up at the young woman with golden brown eyes, "I-You must be Y/N... Edward has told me about you," Bella said nervously.

Y/N stepped forward, crowding Bella back against the wall of lockers as she stared the girl down, "He's told me plenty about you too. But none of it matters because you and Edward are done. You're going to break up with him and forget all about us," Y/N instructed.

Bella scoffed softly, "I-I'm not gonna do that. I love him," She said.

Y/N's face fell, "You little-," She started, an arm quickly wrapped around her waist and pulled her away from Bella.

"Don't even think about it," Edward growled.

He looked up at Bella, he could hear her heart racing, "Are you okay, Bella?" He asked.

She nodded, "I'm fine," She said softly.

"Go wait in the car," Edward said sternly to Y/N. She shoved his arm away from herself before storming off down the hallway.

"You weren't kidding about her," Bella said.

"I'm sorry, that shouldn't have happened," Edward said, making his way over to her.

"You don't have anything to apologize for," Bella assured.

"She'll come around eventually, I promise. She hated me at first too," Edward said.

"I find that hard to believe," Bella said, picking up her backpack and slipping her arms through the straps.

"Y/N is a very complicated person to understand," Edward sighed. The pair began walking down the hallway towards the exit, "Does she try to intimidate people very often?" Bella questioned.

Edward flinched at the question, "What?" Bella asked.

"That wasn't her attempt to intimidate you... Y/N has the ability to control people's minds and if you were anyone but you, you'd be doing exactly what she told you to," Edward said.

"Seriously?" Bella asked, Edward nodded.

The pair made their way outside, Edward's eyes quickly located Y/N, she was leaning against the hood of her car with her arms crossed while staring daggers at Bella.

Edward read her thoughts quickly, resting his hand on Bella's back and walking her over to her truck when he found no immediate threats to her safety in his friend's mind.

"Is there any way that I can talk with her sometime? Just to clear the air," Bella asked.

"That's really not a good idea right now. Just go home and I'll come see you later, alright?" Edward said, she nodded.

Edward opened the door to her truck and allowed her to climb in before closing door for her. She sent him a small smile as she started the truck before putting it into gear and driving off the lot.

...

The Cullen family gathered in the living room, the air was tense as they discussed the incident that had occurred between Bella and Y/N at the school.

Edward had told Carlisle about what Y/N was thinking before he was able to intercept her attack on the young girl Edward had come to care for.

"You were going to hurt Bella, that is absolutely unacceptable," Carlisle said firmly. Y/N rolled her eyes, "I didn't even lay a finger on her, Carlisle, you're being dramatic," She replied.

"Edward heard your thoughts and was able to stop you before inflicting any physical harm to her, but your intentions were clear," Carlisle said, glancing over at Edward.

"Having an incident in the school would absolutely draw enough attention to our family to require us to leave Forks again," Esme said.

"Especially after what happened in the parking lot," Rosalie muttered.

"It's not like I was going to kill her, just maim her a little," Y/N shrugged.

Edward clenched his jaw, taking a breath to try and calm himself down before doing anything rash.

"Bella is with Edward and that makes her a part of this family," Carlisle said.

"Understand that this human girl is not even close to a part of this family. She will die and the world will be left no different than when she was alive. We are wasting time arguing about something ridiculously insignificant," Y/N said.

Edward ran at her, slamming her back against the wall hard enough to crack the plaster. She stared up at him with a blank expression, "Tell me that I'm lying," Y/N said.

Emmett moved to take a step forward, Rosalie grabbed his arm wordlessly before he could get himself involved. Edward and Y/N had to work this out on their own and there was definitely the possibility of an ugly fight breaking out.

"I've seen a vision of Bella as one of us," Alice said.

"That's not going to happen," Edward snapped.

"Then she'll die and this will mean nothing. Take a stand on a topic that matters, Edward," Y/N replied, effortlessly pushing him away from herself and making her way out of the room.

...

PART 2

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ilariyalavorowrites · 4 months ago

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Sunflowers at Dawn (The Pitt)

Pairings: Michael Robinavitch x Reader

Word count: 1,173 words

Universe: The Pitt

Reader gender: Female

Tagged: @questionably-intelligent69 , @dizzybee03 , @virgomillie , @mrsjosephmazzello & @sus-styles

The thin lace curtains danced as a gentle winter breeze slid through the opened window. As it moved through the room, it coaxed all it could to join the merry jaunt. You sat watching with a cooling cup of tea, fresh from arguably the most difficult night’s sleep you had ever had.

Your mind is still racing a million miles a second as you contemplate what tomorrow will bring. The hours ticked by, and before long, slumber’s gentle embrace found you, coaxing you to dream until woken by the chirp of your alarm. Still, it was relatively early, the others would not arrive for some time. It would simply be you and your thoughts.

The light of the early morning sun shone through, as a smile formed upon your lips, as you pondered gleefully through the events that had led you to this moment in time. It had been a rollercoaster, full of many ups and downs. Soaring heights that made your blood rush and deafening lows that nearly broke your spirit along with your heart.

Remembering those dark moments alongside the good was necessary, for they came hand in hand with your beloved. A friendship that had been tested by late nights and early mornings before it blossomed into something deeper, but no less meaningful.

The chill lingered in the air as you pulled your fluffy blue dressing gown tightly around your frame. Trying to escape the cold for just a moment longer, but maybe this was a sign that snow was on its way to coat everything in sight with a glistering white. Now, that would be the cherry on top of a thoroughly planned day.

The bouquet of sunflowers and bluebells entwined with leaves of varying shades of green sat on the dresser. Your friends at first had questioned your choice of flowers, but you held steadfast to your decision. The colours were symbolic but, at the same time, had wonderful memories tied to them. Your first date, your first kiss, to name a few off the top of your head. Yet it was the small silver charms that had been woven through the ribbons holding the bridal bouquet together that tugged at your heart, Jake had been the one to gift them to you.

He and his mother, Janey had welcomed you in their world after it was clear that you were here to stay. Jake might not have been Robby’s biological son, but their connection ran far deeper than that. It was heartwarming to be able to foster a close relationship with him and his mother. Both held a place within Robby’s life and his heart. They came pre-attached, and it would be selfish to even consider pushing them to the wayside. The romantic candle had long since blown out, but the affection had remained.

Robby was a positive male role model in Jake’s life, one who had chosen to remain even after the breakdown of his romantic relationship with his mother. A friendship had risen out of the ashes as he continued to be there. Holding his hands as they navigated through this new dawn.

You couldn’t help but smile, thinking of what lay ahead. This was only the beginning of the story that you would weave together as husband and wife. “I can’t believe that we are finally here” The sound of your mother’s warm southern drawl drew your attention away from the lace as it continued to dance with its invisible partner.

“Neither can I. I’m getting married in only a few short hours," you gleefully replied, watching as she made her approach. Soon enough, the rest of your bridal party would arrive, and you’d get ready for the long day ahead. A day that you never forget, with memories you’d cherish regardless of whatever life threw your way.

She was going to be his wife in less than an hour; Robby might be nervous, but there was an electric level of excitement pulsing just beneath it. It was almost hard to believe that he was going to be married to her, the mere thought that she had even said yes to a date back then. There had been no polite rebuttal, no pushback. Just a chance to see where this went, and here they were, on their wedding day, ready to take the next step.

All roads led there, and sooner, they would lead you to Robby. With him standing at the altar, with his best man, Dr. Jack Abbott, standing at his side. You were ready to be his wife, to walk this path together, hand in hand. –-------------------------------------------------

Robby’s nerves were shot as he aimlessly played with his cufflinks for what has been the third time in the last few minutes. Today was the culmination of months of planning and devotion to the finer details. His fiancee, soon to be wife, Michael couldn’t help but smile as soon as the thought appeared.

It was hard to belive that he was just that goddamn lucky. Robby might have opted out of a traditional Jewish service at Temple, but this venue was the one. He remembered when they had viewed it after having seen a few serious contenders, this had been the last stop of the day. From the moment that they had entered, he had seen how her eyes had lit up; that reaction had been enough. He had been sold then and there.

He had booked with the vendor on the way out, knowing that the date had been decided a few days before and as soon as he had been told that they had availability, he had given them the necessary deposit. She was beyond worth it. His ever-present golden chain with a small Star of David had been tucked beneath his crisp white dress shirt, touches of his faith bleeding through. He had debated over whether to wear a Kippah. Yet she had given Jack the one that his Grandmother had given him after discovering it in a box in one of the many high shelves tucked away for safe keeping.

The accompanying note had tugged at his heartstrings. She was always the brightest spark in his ever-darkening world.

Wear it today, it will be as if she is here with you.

His Fiancee had never gotten the chance to meet his beloved Grandmother, who had a hand in molding his compassionate heart. She had long since passed by the time he had started his residency. Yet, still her influence remained, alongside the strict but fair guidance of his mentor Dr Montgomery Adamson. Both had been instrumental in forming the kind of Doctor he wanted to be. Without either of them, Robby would not be the man he is today.

With his navy suit jacket slung over the back of chair in the far corner, Michael started to feel a rise of anticipation as he couldn’t stop gleefully smiling like a lovesick teenager ready to finally kiss the girl he liked. He was more than ready to take this next step.

#reader insert #the pitt #the pitt x reader #the pitt fanfiction #the pitt imagine #the pitt hbo #dr. michael robinavitch #dr michael robinavitch x reader #dr robby x reader #fluff #pure fluff #established relationship #pre season 1 #prior to the start of white flag when things were actually good #white flag #michael robinavitch x reader #mentioned Jack Abbott #Mentioned Dr Adamson #so much fluff

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drabbletron · 5 months ago

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Can you do a Megatron x Reader fluff and smut pls

|| This was surprisingly hard to write! I haven’t written anything for this guy since college and I feel like it shows. I know I’ve grown as a writer and, the way I write him now, I feel, is so much better than I used to write him. Thanks for your request! ||

Behind Closed Doors: Megatron x Reader SMUT

🔞 MINORS DNI 🔞

All is well in the co-captain’s habsuite as you writhe in his palm, data pads and reports cast by the wayside on his spartan desk.

"Megatron, please! I'm so close...!"

Still he maintains that same languid pace between your thighs. Slow licks that dip just barely into your entrance followed by a teasing suck on your clit. Human valves were so much more sensitive than a mech's. The littlest things could have you coming apart on his intake in moments. Megatron liked that about you, the softness and the need. It scared him in the beginning, but now a welcome change after a long day dealing with how wild the Lost Light can be. Finally, someone is happy with him, and that thought alone almost heals him in a way. It fills the cracks a bit and keeps him coming back for more every time, letting himself indulge that absence of thought just a little longer.

His helm sinks farther between your legs and his optics roll closed with a satisfied hum. His whole mouth covers your sex when he's not mass displaced. It makes pleasing you so very easy, especially when you fit so nicely against his servos. He can curl them around your tender body and keep you spread and secure, away from prying eyes. This is just for you and him and no one else, after all. You can't fight the way your hips buck up against his dermas even though he has your legs pinned up and out of the way. He keeps you on that edge and you just feel like it's too much and not enough all at once.

“C'mon, Meg, I'm right there! I need this! I need -- ah fuck! -- I need you, please!”

With a few good rolls of his glossa you're finishing hard against him. As you lay there, limp against his servo, his optics open and the red color paints you in a rosy light. You're beautiful like this.

He presses an appreciative kiss against your sex, and the little taste he has of you almost has him diving in for another round. It's still amazing how you melt after the interfacing, looking so much more relaxed than he's ever seen you, and he finds he's relaxed too. Despite all the goings on and the weight on his shoulders he's content with what he has, with you, with the crew, with his position in the world though he knows it has to come to an end eventually once they find the Knights. Still, right now that is so far from his mind, like it doesn't even exist.

Moments like these are few and far between as the two of you are so busy with your respective roles, and it's nice when you get the chance to just be. After a few more rounds of you then of him, Megatron retires the both of you to the berth where he admires the way you slip off to sleep on his chassis, spent from the night’s events. At least he makes someone happy, if only behind closed doors.

#mtmte #maccadam #mtmte x reader #transformers #tf mtmte #valveplug #megatron #mtmte megatron #mtmte megatron x reader #idw megatron #idw megatron x reader #megatron x reader

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forever-rogue · 1 year ago

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hello miss bee 🐝

if you're in the mood to write for joel id love to ask one where he and reader just had a baby of their own and ellie starts to feel left out but they both comfort and reassure her that they won't treat her differently since they already unofficially adopted her anyway 🫶🤲

AN | There may be a new baby on the way, but that doesn’t you’ll ever love Ellie any less. She just needs to be reminded of that💕

Pairing | Joel Miller x Pregnant!Reader

Warnings | None

Word Count | 3.3k

Masterlist | Joel, Main

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“I hate this,” you plopped down in the chair on the back patio with a loud huff. You heard a snort of amusement from behind you and turned around to find Joel watching you in amusement. Your lips pulled into a pout and he pressed a kiss to the top of your head, “this is all your fault.”

“Hmm,” he raised an eyebrow before going back over to the makeshift grill to check on dinner, “pretty sure that’s only half true, sweetheart.”

“Well,” you crossed your arms over your chest and frowned at him, “it’s still partially true. Being pregnant is the worst. Especially with this heat. I should have gotten pregnant in the summer so the worst of it would have been in the winter.”

“Think of it this way,” the way you raised an eyebrow in a way that suggested you were anything but amused, “we’ll have a fresh baby for the holidays.”

“I’m still hoping for a halloween baby,” you grinned, rubbing your belly that seemed to be growing by the day, “how cool would that be?”

“The coolest,” Joel teased as you laughed, an actual laugh that went straight to his heart, “I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.”

“The real question - do you think we’re going to have a boy or girl?”

“Girl,” he insisted without hesitation, “I’m always going to have my girls. I don’t think that’s changing anytime soon.”

“I guess we’ll just have to wait and see,” you took a sip of the fresh lemonade and let out a soft sigh, “but I have a feeling you’re going to be wrong!”

“Oh yeah? You wanna bet on that?” Joel stood there, hands on his hips as he watched you closely. You stuck out your tongue at him, causing both of you to laugh.

What you hadn’t realized was that Ellie was in the kitchen, getting some plates ready to bring out, listening to the two of you. She loved you, she loved you both immensely. She knew that you and you knew that. But she couldn’t help the pang that settled in her stomach and the way her heart seemed to constrict. It was a feeling that hadn’t left her since you’d told her you were pregnant. You and Joel had been so excited to tell her and despite the shock of the news, she’d been excited too. Ellie Williams was finally going to have a baby sister or brother. Her family was growing.

But as the weeks passed by and your pregnancy became more visibly obvious, the worse she started to feel. And it felt like it was eating her alive. It was a mix of emotions that she was struggling to handle and cope with. She was excited for you and Joel and your entire little family but it left her feeling…lost and confused.

Ellie knew that both of you viewed her as your daughter and she viewed you as parents. She wondered what it would like when the baby came. Your baby - your and Joel’s flesh and blood. Once you had your own baby, would you no longer care about her? Would she be pushed to the wayside as you welcomed and loved your actual child?

These types of thoughts had been plaguing her for months now. It was stupid, so fuckin’ stupid, she’d be the first to admit, and yet the feelings remained. Realistically, she could have gone to either of you and asked in order to alleviate her fears or get some simple reassurance. But that seemed silly too. What was she supposed to do? Come up to you and ask ‘hey will you still love me once the baby is here?’ That felt ridiculous.

Instead, Ellie internalized her feelings, deciding to push them away and act like nothing was wrong. You’d noticed that something was off with your girl recently. Things had just seen so crazy lately, with getting ready for the baby and Joel being off for a while with work to do, it hadn’t been easy. But Ellie really had been your rock and you hated the idea that you were neglecting her in any sense.

“Ellie?” the girl almost dropped the bowl of salad she was holding when she heard you call out to her. She swallowed the lump in her throat and blinked back her tears before heading into the backyard. Your entire face lit up when you saw her and she felt bad for a moment for ever having doubted your love and affection for her, “there you are, Ellie Bean! Everything okay?”

“Y-yeah,” she set the plates and bowl onto the table and nodded softly, “just got caught up cutting the…tomatoes.”

“There’s no tomatoes in the salad, baby,” you gave her arm a gentle squeeze, “we gave the last of them to the Meyers the other day. Are you sure you’re alright?”

She looked away and nodded, staring into the distance as she pleaded with her heart and mind to remain calm and collected. Joel clicked his tongue and caught her attention, giving her a questioning look. Sometimes he hated how well he knew her and how he seemed to see right through her.

“C’mere,” he motioned for her to come over and she obliged, walking over slowly with a heavy tread. She stopped in front of him and he put his hands on her shoulders, leaning down slightly so he was closer to eye level with her, “what’s wrong, baby girl?”

“Nothing,” she replied through gritted teeth. Joel knew that something was up but he didn’t want to push her and possibly cause her to pull away from him. He sighed softly before pressing a kiss to her forehead. It had become such a reflexive action that he didn’t even think about doing it any more, “you’re being gross and showing too much emotion.”

“Someone’s gotta do it,” he teased and that caused her to smile slightly at him, “‘cause it sure ain’t going to be you right, is it? You wanna talk about it?”

“Not really,” she whispered, “not right now.”

“Okay,” he nodded lightly, “I’ll be here and ready to listen whenever you’re ready.”

“I know, old man,” she pushed his arm before turning on her heel and walking back over to you. She sat down next to you, her gaze drifting for a moment to your belly. You reached up and touched her face, gently stroking her cheek, “you’re both such saps.”

“It’s only because we love you,” you beamed at her. She felt her cheeks growing warm and pink as she stared at the bowl of tomato-less salad, “you wanna help me make some dessert while the food’s cooking? I was thinking pudding…ooh or maybe some sort of pie?!”

“Sure,” she perked up at your enthusiasm, unable to deny the appeal of spending time with you and making a dessert, “let’s do it.”

Ellie decided that she’d figure out the rest later. Right now, she was okay and she just wanted the two of you to have some fun.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“I’m worried about her,” you closed your book and set on the nightstand before turning to your husband with a sad expression on your face. He followed suit and turned so he was fully looking at you.

“The baby?”

“I - no. And we don’t know if it’s a girl or boy yet so calm down,” you laughed for a moment before moving to sit crossed-legged - to the best of your ability anyway - and gave him a serious look, “Ellie. She seems so closed off lately and it always seems like she’s upset, but when I try to talk to her she changes the subject or finds an excuse to leave. I feel like my poor baby girl hates me.”

“She doesn’t hate you,” Joel took your hand in his and gave it a gentle squeeze before you laced your fingers together, “she could never hate you.”

“But something is wrong and I don’t know what it is and I can’t fix it,” a wave of emotion washed over you and tears stung at the back of your eyes. You sniffled, fully aware that you probably seemed ridiculous right now but you didn’t care, “I just want to make it better.”

“Honey,” Joel’s voice was soft as he put his hands on your sides and gently pulled you towards him. You easily gave in, soft and pliable, as he settled you in his lap. You felt pathetic as you looked at him, tears running down your cheeks. He tenderly brushed them away before taking your face in his hands and turning your face up to his, “she doesn’t hate you and she never will. Whatever she’s going through right now, she’ll come around. She’s still guarded and sometimes these things take time. She’ll come around, she always does. We just have to keep on loving her.”

“Promise?” you whispered as he nodded softly. You leaned into his touch as he rubbed your back soothingly, “I don’t know what I’d do if…I don’t know. If she stopped loving us.”

“That ain’t happening,” he pressed a kiss to your forehead, “I have a feeling I know what’s going on with her.”

“Oh?” you looked at him in surprise and he couldn’t help but grin at the sight of your confused expression. The fact that you were so pouty and pregnant made you even more adorable to him than before. He had to fight back a laugh at your expression, opting instead to kiss you softly, “what do you think it is?”

“The baby,” he answered, putting a hand on your belly and rubbing it gently, “I think she’s worried about the baby.”

“What do you mean?”

“Do you think she thinks that we’re just going…to stop loving her?” the waterworks started again and this time you couldn’t hold back the tears, “she thinks we’re going to replace her!”

“Oh honey,” you wrapped your arms around his neck and tried to hug him as best as possible. You huffed as you buried your face into his chest and he softly cooed at you, “I don’t think she thinks we’re trying to replace her. I think she’s worried that we won’t have as much time and love for her."

"That's not true," you hated the fact that that thought even crossed her mind, "that's like…the farthest thing from the truth! She's my baby too. Nothing is ever going to change that."

"I know that," he gently brushed his fingers along your jaw before resting his hand on your cheek, "you know that. I think she just might need a little reassurance."

"Yeah," you sighed softly, "I can do that. I will do that."

"I have no doubt about that either, honey."

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Ellie startled when she heard your enthusiastic knocking on her door. She groaned as she looked at the old school alarm on the bedside table and saw that it wasn't even eight o'clock yet.

"Come in," she rolled onto her side so she was facing the door. You almost threw open the door in your excitement, already fully dressed and ready for the door.

"Hi my love!" Her eyes widened at your cheeriness, "good morning, Ellie Bean."

"It's early," she groaned as you leaned against the doorway, causing you to laugh softly, "why are you so awake?"

"I've been up for a while…couldn't sleep well," you shrugged it off, "but I thought it would be fun if we spent the day together, just the two of us!"

"O-oh," she slowly sat up, heart almost constricting with emotion, "are you sure?"

"Duh," you teased, "its been a while since it's just been the two of us and I figured we could have some fun!"

"Okay," she looked at you, an eyebrow raised in question. You clapped excitedly and she offered you a tentative smile in response, "w-wait, am I in trouble?"

"Of course not," you walked over to her and held out your hand to her. She took yours and slowly slipped out of the bed, "I just want to spend some time with my favorite girl."

"Alright," a little bit of a flush crossed her cheeks as she offered you a smile, "yeah, that could be fun."

"Let's go then slow poke, no time to lose!"

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Your day had been filled with doing anything and everything that Ellie wanted - within reason of course. As the day bled into night, the two of you were at the lake, sitting on the dock, feet dangling into the water.

"Can I ask you something?" You finally couldn't take it anymore and needed to clear all the air. Ellie paused before nodding slowly and turning towards you.

"Sure…"

"I feel like lately…things have been different," you put your arm around her shoulders and gave her a gentle squeeze, "and I want to make sure you're alright. You've been off lately, and I want to know if you're okay and if I can do anything to help."

"Oh. Oh," Ellie swallowed thickly; she thought she'd been better at disguising her feelings, "umm…it's…just. I don't know. Things have just felt different since you've been pregnant."

"Yeah?" You asked as she turned to you with a sad little smile and a nod, "oh, Ellie."

"I just…it feels weird that…umm. Like it's you and Joel, you know? And now you're having your own child and it makes me feel like…where's my place?"

"Baby," you tried to keep your own emotions at bay but it was hard when all you wanted to was to wrap her up in a big hug, "your place is with us - it'll always be with us. We're family. Nothing is going to change that."

"But if you love the new baby more than me?" You hated that she even thought anything like that. You wished you could convey just how very much you loved her, "I keep thinking about…what if you don't want me anymore."

"We will never not want you or love you," you took her hand and held it tightly in yours, "that will never change. Nothing could change how we feel about you. You're our girl, Ellie."

"Are you sure? The baby-"

"The baby doesn't change anything," you pulled her into your body as much as you could, "its another person we're bringing into our family that we can love. It doesn't mean any of us is going to get less love. Okay? I swear on my life. And Joel's life. All of it."

"Every time I've gotten close to people they've been taken from me," Ellie sniffled brushing at her eyes with the back of her hand, "my parents, my family, my friends…I almost lost Joel. I don't want to lose you too and the baby. I'm not sure if I'd make it if I did."

"Ellie," you softened at the young girl, "you are so young and you've been through so much. More than anyone ever should. And I know the world is scary and we don't know what the future holds but we can't let that dictate how we feel about the present or how we act. You're not going to lose us or your brother or sister. Never. And maybe me just saying that doesn't make anything better but I'll show you and I'll keep showing you that we mean it. Honestly, I don't think I'd survive without you. You are the world to me, Ellie."

"Being pregnant has made you so sappy," she laughed through her tears, "even more than normal. Its kind of gross."

"It's because I love you so much, kiddo," you grinned at her, brushing away her tears, "but the hormones definitely aren't helping! Luckily it won't be too much longer before the baby is here."

"Are you scared?"

"Terrified," you confessed with a sheepish grin, "but I know I'll be okay. I've got you Joel and you. Everything will be okay."

"Yeah," she nodded, a bit of confidence oozing back into her, "we'll be okay. I'm excited to meet the baby."

"Boy or girl you think?"

"Girl," she seemed so confident that you were almost convinced of that as well, "Joel's meant to be surrounded by girls."

"Funny, that's exactly what he said too," you shook your head in amusement thinking about the two of them. They were too alike for their own good, "I guess we'll just have to wait and see."

"Whatever," she playfully rolled her eyes, "we all know we're right!"

"Mhmm," you slowly stood up and held out your hand to her, "come on my love. Let's go home and annoy Joel."

She took your hand eagerly, "I love you too, just so you know."

"Yeah," you promised her softly, "I know. I love you more, kiddo."

Ellie approached you slowly, almost unsure if she should be coming over. You beamed at her, motioning for her to come closer. She stole a quick look at Joel, who offered her a small smile and nod of reassurance.

"Come here, my love," you held out your hand to her and she came over, staring at the bundle in your arms in awe, "I hate to admit it, but Joel was right. You've got yourself a little sister."

"Wow," she reached over and gentle stroked her chubby little cheek, "she's so small. What's her name?"

"Well, we don't have a name picked out yet," you smiled softly, "we were hoping you'd help us by picking her name."

"Me?"

"You! If you'd like to that is," you could see her eyes watering up, and your heart felt so full, "you can take a bit to think about it-"

"Daisy," she stated softly, looking between you and Joel to gauge your reactions, "I like Daisy."

"Me too," you gave her a hand squeeze, "Daisy it is. It's perfect. Do you want to hold her, Ellie?"

"I-I don't know," she swallowed the lump in her throat as the baby cooed softly, "she's so small and I don't wanna…hurt her."

"You won't," you promised, straightening up as she stepped closer, "hold her to your chest and make sure you're supporting her head, okay?"

"Okay," she reached over gingerly, as though the baby was made of glass. She took her from you and did as you said, holding the small baby protectively. Daisy made a few sounds before yawning and snuggling into Ellie. The girl watched her in amazement, "she's so cute and little."

"Just like you," you teased, reaching over and giving her arm a squeeze. You turned to Joel, who was watching the scene unfold with nothing short of heart eyes, "look at that, Joel. Look at our girls. They're the best."

"Yeah," he agreed, pressing a kiss to the side of Ellie's head, "they are. But you know what else?"

"Hmm?"

"I was right - it was a girl," he threw you a cheeky grin as you snorted in amusement, "wouldn't change it for the world."

"Yeah, me neither," Ellie piped up, "I guess we're a pretty cool family. Daisy and me anyways. You guys are alright."

"We love you too," you sighed contentedly, happy to have your little family all together, "both of you. Lots and lots."

#joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller x fem!reader #joel miller imagine #joel miller one shot #pedro pascal #tlou

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mxnster-soul · 13 days ago

Text

Some more Welcome To Wayside stuff

Cuz uuuuh me need filler content

(OC's: Phasm [The literal void], and Squeak)

Unedited below

[DO NOT USE/EDIT/TRACE/FACECLAIM AS YOUR OWN OC'S FOR ANY PURPOSES]

#Phasm #Phasm (Welcome To Wayside)#The void #weirdcore #oc #Squeak (Welcome To Wayside)#Squeak #Welcome To Wayside #clowncore #kidcore #liminal #dereality #blue's doodles #tw eyestrain #tw eye contact #tw: scopophobia #horror #horror oc

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osamucide · 7 months ago

Text

⊹ PUT ME IN A MOVIE

IF HE LIKES ME, TAKES ME HOME . . . ft. Nikolai Gogol

wc: ~5.8k

cw: NSFW—MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT—PLEASE READ ALL TAGS BEFORE PROCEEDING, snuff film maker!nikolai, alternate universe—no abilities, gn+afab!reader, 2nd person pov, siglai easter egg if you squint, stalking, implied/referenced dissociation, substance use/abuse, intoxication, drugging, abduction, choking, filming, restraints, graphic depictions of violence and gore, graphic noncon elements, mindbreak(?), spanking, object insertion (knife handle), knives/cutting, murder, reader.. dies(?)

reid: brilliant idea courtesy of my friend @berryzai thank u for planting this thought in my little freak brain. this was a fun little practice in suspense building and i would love feedback <3 .......if anyone would be tickled by a gross and gratuitous part 2 lmk lollll

It would happen to you.

At what’s felt like your goddamn lowest, too. There’s been a distant echo of a warning in your brain—perhaps from your mother or your father a long while ago; it rings now, still—that you hadn’t been heeding from the second the alluring silver-haired man placed himself with grace next to you at the bar. Be aware of your surroundings. Don’t go out by yourself. Don’t let your guard down. Sentiments you know to arm yourself to the teeth with—or, knew to, at some point, anyway.

You’re vigilant, always have been. Maybe aside from the going out by yourself part, but you could hardly help that living in a new city, sans friends and family, would prove more exhausting and isolating than you could’ve imagined in the technological age. No amount of text messages or FaceTimes or stupid Tiktoks sent to you from familiar, faraway fingers has translated into anything other than bitter little reminders that you’re really on your own this time.

Your social life has fallen completely by the wayside in light of your frantic work schedule. You’re never off the clock for more than twelve hours at a time, what with how criminally expensive your shiny, brand-new rent is—you could laugh to yourself right now if you were less delirious, thinking about paying so much for a room where you slept three feet from the shitter—and even if you did have friends, or nice coworkers, or a day off, would you even be able to muster up the dignity to bring anyone to your excuse of a place? You doubt it. You can barely stand being cooped up in there as it is, which is why, so often, you find yourself waggling your empty glass for the fourth time each evening at some bartender who by now recognizes you better than you recognize them.

And who could blame you? You have never felt so fucking alone.

You’ve been feeling caught in the spiraling downstream with all the other excreta Yokohama pushes from the pipes in the slums out into the ocean. It’s probably why you so eagerly welcomed the not-so-subtle curiosity of the man who introduced himself to you as Nikolai, proclaiming himself an avid drinker of your cocktail of choice—whiskey and whiskey—and commenting with enthusiasm on the glow of your skin even in the stale light of the bar. The apology for the awkwardness of such a compliment that followed it was just as bubbly; it was perhaps the first thing in weeks, if not months, that had made you crack a scoff of a laugh and raise your eyes to another human being outside the pretense of a monetary transaction.

He was stunning, really. You’d even felt lucky, momentarily, to have your attention stolen from your sorrows by this man whom you learned was visiting from Ukraine, was a filmmaker and photographer, was blind in one eye—it was true, it seemed, as his own skin was unblemished, perfect and not unlike porcelain, aside from a vertical scar plunging through his right eyebrow to below, just above his cheek, which did not detract from his beauty one bit, by the way. His teeth gleamed, wide and often, in low-contrast to his pale complexion when he tangented about his artistic endeavors which, according to him, explored the depth of the soul and the capabilities of the mind. He was fascinated with people, he told you. Fascinated, to a spiritual extent it seemed, with the billions of different possible human conceptions of the word freedom.

Freedom. It felt ironic now.

He could tell you had a certain depth, he’d said—one he liked to find and study in people. His testimony went like this: he’d have drinks and movies and a double bed for you to crash in, and it sounded a world more appealing than drowning your organs in liquor alone another night before slumping to your abominable makeshift-cell of a home before throwing up your hangover, sleeping a half-hour over the toilet, and heading in for your morning shift.

So, you agreed, on behalf of the fact that you’d felt fascinated by him, too. You noticed he’d gone on blabbering so long that you’d sobered up adequately enough to nod and accept, in what you assumed was your right mind, his invitation to go back to his place with him. In retrospect, he could’ve asked you to come over and do this—whatever was happening right now—and you’re not sure you wouldn’t have just laughed and resisted only playfully.

You’ve been so desperate for any interruption in the mind-numbing, feet-dragging routine that’s consumed your pathetic life that if you weren’t a dose of sedative short of completely panicking right now, you’d probably still be thinking this isn’t too bad.

But that’s silly, of course. You do, above all, feel like an idiot through your haze. You’d done everything right—everything except the going out by yourself thing, and that's how you've wound up in this man's dingy apartment, cuffed to the radiator with no less than three layers of tape wrapped around your head and ankles respectively. Alone. Alone is what you're used to these days, and it’s looking like it’s all going to come to a screeching halt the very same way.

You have no idea where he's gone. You just hope he’ll save the mutilation for after you’re dead.

Hey, you can forget about paying rent for that shithole of yours, at least.

His own's not a sight to behold, and you've gotten pretty familiar with it since you've woken up. He was showing you pictures before he left—before he knocked you unconscious, cleanly and with whatever he obviously slipped in the homemade whiskey and whiskey as far as your memory serves, but the throbbing, sore patch at the back of your skull that's obviously bruised when you lean it against the wall says otherwise. He must've hit you. But maybe he didn't. At your brightest and most alert, you can't say you'd be able to differentiate between blunt-force fog, roofie brain sludge, or the mixture of both.

The photographs started out elegant, really. Men and women alike posed solo, side by side, or in small groups, with knives and guns, mostly—pretty lines, sharp contours, silhouettes that prompted you to ask if he was a student. No, he'd replied, here for work; this is just a hobby. More men and women—a few recurring ones, including an androgynous-looking person with the most artful pastel split-dye you'd ever seen and a side profile to die for—in intricate shibari. A coworker? you'd asked; you could say that, he had replied with a wink. You'd drawn your legs up into yourself onto his bed where you leaned into him closer than could be considered friendly and you fawned. You weren't sure you'd met anyone like him. You hadn't met anyone in a very long time, it felt like.

The photos got strange rather quickly. Same photoshoots, same models, same weapons—but with blood. Bullet holes and brain matter and exposed bones. He has a passion for practical effects, he'd told you. See that little bit of brains there? he'd pointed out. Wet cauliflower rubbed with food coloring. Just like that. Easy! Blown-off skin was exceptionally simple to recreate using deli meat, you learned. You remember ogling a particularly convincing pile of innards with half-disgust, half-astonishment. He had photos of similar nature pinned up, collaged, ripped and repieced all over his water-damaged walls, all taken by him; there must've been hundreds. He’d love to do a shoot with you, if you’d be up for it, he said. He’d make sure you’re comfortable—show you just how simple it is to create such images with practical, do-it-yourself effects.

It hadn't started to sink in until too late just how practical the effects in those pictures might've been.

But by then, you were seeing two of him. When did he grow another trailing, milky braid? You'd reached out drunkenly to touch it, take it between your fingers, and there was two of your one hand, as well; there had to be, for when you looked down at your glass, now empty, there were two of those, too. You had four hands, and his two smiles were as charming as ever when he giggled and asked if you liked his hair. Yeah, you're pretty sure you'd slurred, maybe once, maybe twice, but after that, it's all dark.

You should've scalped and strangled him with it.

Your guess is as good as anyone's how long you've been here, how long he—Nikolai—has been gone, if or when he's coming back.

But there's no room for guesses when you're hyperventilating manually through your nostrils just to keep yourself awake. You've been searching frenetically, yanking uselessly, screaming into plastic for at least a couple of hours now—long enough to be reduced to whimpering, rocking, and absent surveying of your surroundings. A fridge with the handle duct taped on. An unmade bed with black and white striped sheets stretched over it. Cutlery all over the countertop. Laminated floors curling up beneath the cupboards. A birdcage, tipped over and with no bird in it. Smoke stains on the ceilings. Boxes. Boxes. Cardboard boxes piled up next to the dresser and spilling out of the meager closet, among other trash. A video camera silent on a tripod in the far corner. A distinct and hollow smell that reminds you, for some reason, of your elementary school. A small analog television. All those photos, everywhere.

You've cried enough in your life to know the taste of tears. It's odd when they run, like raindrops down a window, across the tape and you find the salt inaccessible.

Please, succumb to dehydration, or starvation, or let the will just leave my body—who hasn't wanted to drop dead a time or two in their life? You just never expected these prayers of yours to be so immediate. So visceral.

You think back to the pile of innards in that photo. Gelatin, he'd told you. As if to prove himself, he bounced over to his kitchen cabinets and produced a tin mold that looked readily liver-like.

So much trouble, just to get you here. Inevitably.

The last words you remember him uttering to you—quiz time had preceded them—while he tucked your hair behind your ear and grinned toothily, don’t haunt you as much as they feel like drying cement in your stomach.

“At what point tonight did I start lying to you?”

Even now—especially now—you can’t say.

You’re rather annoyed with the squeaking, wheezing sound that pulses through the space until you remember it’s coming from yourself. Your lungs and throat. It’s getting easier to slip out of your body like that, the longer you sit here.

You hope the dissociative blessing will find you again at the right times.

It would be nicer—not to be so aware of everything right now. The metal digging into your wrists, your elbows and knees knocking against the humming radiator, the absurd way your cheeks puff up like a squirrel’s before your airways can remember you’re not allowed to draw breath in through your mouth anymore. You’re aware of the ache at the base of your neck and the nail marks you dig into your own palms and loads of other physical stimuli, in the form of nothing, barraging you from inside this apartment where nothing, dreadfully, happens. Nothing.

But again, your awareness does not reach your sense of passing time.

So, when he does come back, it might’ve been an hour since you’d woken up—or it might’ve been a few, or it might’ve been longer.

You don’t know.

“Oh, my friend! Terribly sorry to keep you waiting,” he chirps, as if you’re lounging on the couch with the next episode of your favorite show loaded up and ready to watch.

The tears come fresh when he walks over and squats down in front of you, at your eye level, muttering hey, hey like you’re a small dog, smiling the smile that was once charming—now it makes your jaw tighten, your breathing quicken, your back hit the wall.

“I promised movies, didn't I?”

You could mistake his tone for warm if you closed your eyes. You want to. You can't.

After regarding you and finding some satisfaction—you're not sure what in—Nikolai hops up, whistling. Your gaze follows him, dutifully, as if watching him will keep him at bay. That white braid swishes out of time with your breath as the little television crackles to life.

His rifling through one of the boxes produces a stack of DVDs in telltale white paper sleeves, each with its own permanent-marker-scribbled identifier like a love letter—you see these, make these out when he kneels back down in front of you, still whistling as he fans them like a deck of cards, like he wants you to pick one, any one.

But then he clicks his tongue.

“So impolite of me.” He seems to remember the predicament he’s placed you in. Setting the discs aside, he digs in his pocket. “Let's try something, okay?”

On its own, your head shakes side to side. No, is what the tape keeps in your mouth.

But it's a small key, and he's reaching for your cuffs—some sick part of you feels ready to forgive him if he just unlocks you and lets you go. Maybe he'll let you go. You would've stayed for movies had he not done this to you, you swear, unintelligible in your mewling—you’d been so lonely, he could’ve shown you anything and you would’ve stayed. Just let me go, you think now. Just let me go.

Before the tooth of the key slides in—so close—he tells you, "Nothing funny, now. This hand—" he taps the one closest to him, "—is for picking only, got it?"

He's frozen; you realize he's waiting for an answer. Your sight has never wavered from him, but you feel like you're zeroing back in on him and his expectancy from behind closed eyes as he tilts his head forward, toward you. Yes begins to form on his lips, like he's speaking it into you. You nod harshly. It hurts your neck.

But when the key clicks, a caged animal cannot be expected not to pounce.

Your free hand flies up to claw at his face, hard, unforgiving and without knowing what exactly you hope to accomplish. Nail tracks and fingertips find purchase as quickly and comfortably as they can into an eye socket. If your mouth was free, you'd be spitting. Shouting.

But he just peels you away and twists your arm in a way that forces your torso to follow and you screech into the tape; he twists, toward your chest and then down, and you're no match for him and his manic clenched teeth and the way he rises up to plant his foot upon your wrist, in the middle of your back.

Your chin hits the floor.

Something in your shoulder tears loose with a nauseating crack.

You scream. It's not loud enough.

“It's only gonna get worse if you don't just listen to me, sweetheart,” he growls, leaning down, grinding your carpal bones to dust beneath his heel.

Sweetheart. The first time he calls you anything other than friend is when it's really started. He's hurting you and the gutting certainty that he won't stop here is washing over you like a frigid wave.

Those pathetic, annoying sounds again—whining, whimpering. It's harder to remember it's coming from you when your eyes are screwed shut. If you close them tight enough maybe you can pretend this is all happening to somebody else.

“Obviously, that won’t work,” Nikolai says more to himself than you, yanking you back up, putting you back together off the radiator in a few motions you can’t keep up with before he lets you fall again.

You ragdoll.

You would like to think you might’ve had more fight in a situation like this one. But a steady ache is spreading from your shoulder down into your back and the angle at which he presses you into an arch reminds you your dignity is not something of his concern. You ragdoll.

“No, no, baby, we’re gonna get up now.” He drags you up by your wrists and hair and you groan and ache and try to ragdoll yourself into a bag of sand but he kicks your bound ankles and the negative spaces your knocking knees cut out until you’re sitting on your ass on the edge of his bed, in front of the buzzing TV, tears aglide in a new wave when he threatens you, with so little as a bruising grip on your face, to stay upright. “You’ll be okay,” he purrs emptily.

You’re past the liberty of choice, so the thin stack of DVDs hit the dresser with a papery thwack—all but one, which he jams into the slot before he crawls behind you on the bed.

It wouldn’t have been so difficult to turn you into a lover, really. You wish you could tell him this while he sets either thigh on each side of your own, slides his arms around your middle, beneath your arms, the dishonesty of his fingertips beneath the hem of your shirt so welcoming. You still wish he wouldn’t have lied to you. You wish he wouldn’t have put drugs in your drink. You wish he’d take the tape off and let you wake up from the pain careening parallel to your spine and in your hand and you’d cover his arms with your own and tell him thank you, you’ve needed this, it’s been so long since you’ve felt physical affection from a human being that you think you could cry. His fingers wander between your legs and away again and you are crying.

But Nikolai doesn’t want to turn you into a lover. The staticy screen hosts a shaky frame trained on where a cracked alleyway swallows up the foot of a brick building in shifty evening light and when it pans up to a window, there you are, impossibly, between a sliver of blinds. When you turn your head away—hearing those suffocated garbles from someone else’s throat—he creeps back up to your jaw, hard, like he wants to leave his fingerprints on the teeth they’ll use to identify you.

You watch yourself get undressed. You watch yourself wrap a towel around your waist and step halfway out of sight behind the frosted glass of your shower door.

He gets up, periodically, to change the disc. Whistling, leaving you shivering in your bones, glaring sharply at you when you writhe until he guides your wet eyes to another film of yourself. And another. And another. And another. Ones where you’re on your way to work, on the bus. Ones where you carry groceries. Ones where your back faces him, on that barstool of yours. Ones where he gets close enough to touch you and then retreats. Ones where he’s picked up the convenience store receipt that slips out of your pocket. He uncrumbles it for the camera and scans the text and discerns your fate between your case of wine and bag of chips, laughing to himself. He’s a filmmaker. You’re his muse and we’re going to make the best movie ever, you think you hear him whispering to you or shouting at you with vigor when the television finally zaps dead beneath his touch. It’s going to be an exploration, he says, and he’s so lucky it’s you, who did everything right, sweetheart.

“How many days,” he begins, moving you like a mannequin to face him on the bed, your legs curling up uncomfortably as if they’re one, “did I follow you, do you think? Give me your best guess.”

You desperately don’t want to vomit behind the tape, so you don’t make a sound.

But he’s looking to you like he’s waiting for you to take your turn in the game, most likely unwilling to give you a leg up after your little outburst earlier. The tiny red crescents between his brows, barely visible beneath his snowy bangs, do not miss you.

Chain link clicking, you lift up your one ten-fingered hand—no more four hands for a wider array of guesses—and present six shaky fingers. You think about going for his neck.

Nikolai shakes his head as if he’s pleased to be winning. “Try again.”

You spare a middle finger. Without looking at your seven, he shakes no once more. You don’t have to cast your eyes down to his arms, filling out the sleeves of his plain white shirt, to remember how strong they were around you without even trying to be. You’d have to be quick and you’d have to squeeze hard.

Your thumb pokes out.

No.

The rest of your planning time rests like a marble between your last two fingers and when your ring finger flicks up you feel it slipping—slipping because what will you do after? You’ll have to choke him until he’s out cold. You’ll have to be certain he’s subdued before you’ll be able to waddle on your bound feet to his door to undo the latch and deadbolt—forbid you shouldn’t have enough time before you can make it out, pound on a neighbor’s door, get to a phone so someone, anyone can help you get out of here.

Happily, Nikolai shakes his head once more.

And you’re uncurling your pinky, making your way to a mockery of jazz hands.

But before you get there, you lunge at him with everything left in your body and shattered hand—your ridiculously stringy reserve of willpower, funneled down through your dislocated shoulder and hours of frantic breath and trembling next to that radiator so that when your nails land this time in half-moons around his throat you groan; you get his jugular with two palms, one assured, one numb, insistent knuckles, and vengeant fingertips and his eyes widen so sweetly, his mouth twists down in the first and only displeased expression you’ll see on his angel-white face and you grit your hidden teeth and squeeze. You can taste the outside air and the blood from inside your cheek.

Frowning and flailing backwards, Nikolai gives you the privilege of a little performance.

You think you could kill him before he kills you. You want to see the blue rise up his pretty skin. You grit your teeth. Your groan becomes a shriek. You squeeze.

And when he’s on his back he pries you off. Does you one better.

He’s grinning before he can get you off him—you’ve lost. You’ve lost a long time ago—when are you going to believe him? Does he have to spit it in your tear-streaked face? Surely you’ll understand, after his knuckles ripple into the space between your upper and lower jaws, now that he stamps his knee into the back of your neck in another choreography-perfect motion you never stood a chance against. Jazz hands against your chest, elbows jabbing your stomach.

“It was thirteen, anyway,” he growls like he’s angry with you for guessing incorrectly. “Thirteen days. Feisty one.” You had no extra hands or mouth to make such a speculation, and now his heavy leg bears down on you. Hand on your back, grappling toward the curve of your ass, almost soothing. Almost. Your eyes are pressed into a blur of black and white stripes.

Smack.

It’s one of the kinder touches, still.

“I don’t like having to discipline my subjects into submission, you know.” Nikolai almost sounds regretful. “If you’ll just—” Smack— “trust me to do my work, I can trust you to be good for me.”

Your spinal cord could snap like the head off a flower and he just smacks your ass, over, over. All your permission to make sound is trapped between his kneecap and his mattress, him and his rough hands, one of which knots in your hair and yanks, yanks until you can’t pretend this is nice anymore. You should’ve struck faster, gripped harder, shaken him with all your might but you should’ve done lots of things prior to now, and he’s the disappointed discipliner and you’re sorry, alright—you’re sorry you caused either of you all this trouble and you just want to go home. You just want to go back to your shithole apartment and let your chafed wrists heal and allow the long-term pain of a few dodged medical bills remind you that this wasn’t quite a dream, but at least you’ll be alive.

At least you’d be alive.

“Don’t fucking move,” he doesn’t bark at you. He’s not unkind. It’s a simple instruction. All the air rushes back in when he gets up, off you. Moves somewhere in the room to make a soft clatter.

At least you’d be alive. But for what? To slog back to the machine? With all this added weight on you?

Would you want to be? You hadn’t begun with much when you crossed the threshold of the bar into the night he swept you up in. You had the stifling promise of work, home, work, home, feel alone, drink yourself to sleep, and you would be dumbly hopeful—no, pitiably lying to yourself to think anything more, anything different would be waiting for you on the other side of this.

Another clatter, dull and short, sounds on the bed next to you and you dip with the weight of him following. From the clatter he chooses scissors—you know this because your shirt goes first, the cotton ripping, before your pants which too rip, rip, rip in places all over before he shucks it all, undergarments too, off you like the skin of a fruit.

At least you’d be alive. But what is it you’d aim to become after being Nikolai’s pretty little victim? A work of his art? Surely this isn’t something you want to carry with you, you think in the margin between rationality and ruin—between you and the door you’re not certain you’ll ever reach again. Certainly, not in one piece.

You roll over, exposed. He’s so pretty, biceps flexing, jaw clenching while he situates a body that is not yours into an adequate position where he can sever the duct tape binding the ankles with a few back-and-forth flourishes of his serrated knife like it’s a saw. This is a hobby, you remember. You wonder if he’s a butcher or a mortuary scientist or what he does to make his living and if he looks just as beautiful doing it. You’ve been granted the point-of-view of specimen. You can’t think of a perspective you’d rather watch him splay himself across your thighs from.

Your feet twitch to kick. Your brain doesn’t follow through.

“I told you you’d be comfortable, didn’t I?” He’s back to grinning that grin you’re holding onto. You can be a pretty model if you keep reminding yourself that if you weren’t weakened and restrained in his bed, that grin would look so inviting. His joy and passion are what drew you into him in the first place, after all. He talks to you, looks at you so softly while you feel broken. Isn’t that all you’ve been craving for someone to do? “Let’s get you comfortable, dovey.”

He kisses you—not rough, especially gentle in fact—over the tape as he’s tucking the same knife between your bodies. The kiss of an angel, the kiss of death.

It’s not comfortable when the stainless steel handle finds its way inside you. You can’t even get wet, looking at him, seeming so patient now that he’s got you bending nice and far, and his teasing from earlier has done nothing; he’s so pretty and you would’ve wanted him before this. He didn’t have to do this to you.

It’s uncomfortable, too, when he fucks you with it, slow at first—gradually faster. You don’t think you even moan, or whine. You just watch him, silky braid fallen in the crook of his neck, as he alternately studies your face, the knife, how you don’t react. When he fucks you faster, risking cuts upon his own hand, you let your eyes flutter shut, your fingers curling and uncurling subtly like they’re the only part of you that registers what’s happening. You don’t want to watch him anymore, going to the trouble. For you.

He pushes it so deep for you, so deep you start to feel the serrated teeth. Your toes echo your fingers and finally, you give him sound in the form of a cry.

“Oh, that’s good,” Nikolai tells you. A laugh bubbles through the words.

Stop, you think you’re saying. Don’t. It’s anyone’s guess and his guess is more.

So you leave. You remember this is all happening to someone who isn’t you—you have to feel it, but it’s not happening to you. You leave and you pretend it’s two of his fingers in you—they’re cold, that’s all—pretend the tape and the cuffs are some kink thing you were thrilled to indulge him in. Pretend you’re not concussed. Pretend your faculties can come back to you anytime you want in this little daze of yours—he’s just making you comfortable, he’s just making you feel good because your life isn’t so sad that you don’t deserve even that.

He’s just making you feel good.

Your tears have no end. They unravel out of you like string.

“Don’t cry, baby,” his voice shakes with the speed. You jostle with his pace but you pretend you’re floating. “Don’t cry, pretty thing.” But he’s cutting you open from the worst place and when he grabs your chin again, his hands’ slick with his blood or maybe yours and you jolt back home into your body to find him again and the knife is still inside you.

You hurt all over. He’s just making you feel good.

Your sobs come loud and violent, withheld only by tape. He’s patient with you. He’ll be patient with you while you purge it, surely. You blur over, the string undoing faster and faster and he’s wiping your tears away, replacing them with something else, something red. It gets in your eyes. You miss his grin this time but if you were to see it, you would not think it the same one from before.

When your body rejects the knife he scoops it up, licks the handle clean of all you’ve given him so far, with care.

And he hushes you.

“It feels good,” he reaffirms to you. “You’re doing so good.”

You’re doing better than you ever have. You’re good—you must be. It’s the first time you’ve heard that in what feels like lifetimes. You’re good beneath his touch. He smears your blood or his blood down your cheek, down the tape, and you cry for him. Stop. Don’t. Be cruel to me again. It’s what I know. It’s easier to die when burning hatred is the one burying you. His affection makes your stomach turn. You loll into the palm cupping your face. You’re doing so good.

And he’s grinning, sharp and wide, when your eyes roll back and forth. Back into your skull, forward onto him. Nikolai grants your wish when his fingers worm beneath, between the tape and your skin, while he’s telling you don’t scream or I won’t be so nice anymore and when he tears it away your face feels cold and you scream anyway—you scream for your crumpled arm and the violation and the knife life’s held above your throat come to materialize now in the third strike against him and there is a thick, flowing gash that leaves you feeling waterboarded as it seethes and gurgles its way through your teeth and around your shoulders all at once like a crimson harness to keep you flat on your back while Nikolai looks at you like you didn’t learn.

“Ultimately—” His cloud-colored eyes burn as he towers over you like a god. Your god. The only one that can set you free, now. “—you made such easy little snuffbait,” he quips, running the blade once, twice along the cloth of his shirt before turning it on the thin, tender skin keeping him from your sternum. You and your first-floor housing and your melancholia. “Too caught up in your woes to notice the man following you around each corner for—god, weeks now. So little to live for anymore, sweetheart—it wouldn’t be so much of a shame to put you out of your misery now, would it?”

The look you give him must be delirious and begging; you swear a flicker of the most genuine sympathy you’ve ever seen crosses his face until he’s laughing, softly, rumbling to your ears like a fan’s whir.

“Oh, it would be such a waste of you,” he waves away. “Besides, I’ve already given you my artist statement.”

His artist statement. From the bar.

Freedom.

His work—work, the word is bitter and foamy mixed with your blood—explores different conceptions of freedom.

Freedom. What could it possibly have to do with an innocent person, bound and drugged with their throat slit on film? What exploration is being made? What endeavor toward enlightenment are you when your mouth is too full of blood to ask him to stop?

Freedom. He’s been following you for weeks, if all he’s said is truthful, while you’ve been swirling in that downstream like a helpless fucking bug. And like a kid looking for an insectile test subject, Nikolai plucked you right up, splayed out your limbs, and stuck you beneath the microscope. Next he’d pin you, dry you, feed the story of your mortality to someone—his next victim, an empty roll of film, his own reflection, some god that wasn’t listening to you—and you would be another nameless face, a decomposing body, a snapshot demonstration of how well deli ham apparently mimics peeled-back human skin. A lesson in deliverance.

You haven’t been free in a long time. Perhaps, even, since before you moved to Yokohama and all your shit uprooted itself to the forefront of your mind and landed you on your back in the Devil’s bed.

“You should know well by now I’m interested in more than just seeing you bleed.”

Your hands reach out, trembling for his face like it’s salvation, while he leans to rest with his chin above yours. The Devil traces white heat, a bullseye for where he’ll stab into that tender skin on your chest, drag down, cut you open for him to begin the messy part of his project.

You tilt ninety degrees and the red light of the camera winks at you. At least you’re not alone.

“I told you, I’m going to set you free.”

#nikolai x reader #nikolai smut #bsd x reader #bsd smut #bsd dead dove #dead dove #dead dove do not eat #mdni #nnnsfw.ᐟ #with love—reid

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impandskizz-zine · 2 months ago

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Something to Address!

Hello! I wanted to make a quick statement as the admin of this project. I, and especially my team of mods, should not be harassed because of this project. This project began development months ago, and we do not tolerate harassment on behalf of people's opinions on recent statements by Skizz. We have received false applications as a way for individuals to anonymously berate us for working on this project, and that behavior is never okay. If you are truly concerned about safe and welcoming environments, this would not be a productive course of action to take. I would much rather you reach out to me personally to discuss things if you are concerned about the effects of this zine.

We are all aware of the situation, and have chosen to move ahead with the project regardless. The mod team as a whole would like to operate with grace and patience for others, while also expecting that people should learn from their mistakes, which takes time. The majority of our team is queer, and we do not take trans rights lightly or as something to be thrown to the wayside. Please be sure of our support and solidarity with the mcyt trans community.

While it is in no way our responsibility to make statements on Skizz's behavior, I felt it was important to address things for the wellbeing of my team. Thank you, and we hope that you continue to support this project as a creative endeavor!

#imp & skizz zine #hermitblr #trafficblr #mcyt

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shinesurge · 2 years ago

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Webcomic rings run by people within the community are cool and you should support them

I've been loudly struggling a little bit with corporate webcomic Stuff lately so I want to mention something positive to balance it out: webrings run by small groups of creators earnestly trying to support each other are slowly making a comeback and I for one am delighted.

If you weren't around for them in the before times, webrings were just some folks who hang out a lot who feature each other on their websites. That's literally it lmao. There's generally no money involved and it only really functions the way it's supposed to if people have control over their own websites AND genuinely want to participate and get excited about other folks' work, which means the practice has pretty well fallen by the wayside over the years in webcomic culture given. Everything. In the rare event someone decides to do something like this it's usually in the form of a link list somewhere on their website; this doesn't usually indicate any sort of mutual support, it's just a list of what the creator is reading themselves.

A webring, though, is an official banner or hub that people gather under intentionally where each member is more or less on equal footing. It's essentially the concept of "a rising tide lifts all boats" put into practice, each creator brings their own audience to the table in a passive, opt-in sort of way that's different from working for a publisher since there isn't necessarily a Top Spot or a paycheck everyone's vying for, and individuals retain autonomy over both their own work and how (if) they promote each other. You're all at your own tables in an artist alley rather than fighting over the table in the front of the book store, essentially.

I have two rings and one collective for you today!

Webcomic Ring was brought to my attention AGES ago by Holly, one of the artists featured there, and I might have brought it up at some point but I'm doing it again lmao. This is exactly the kind of thing you ought to be looking for; a small group of enthusiastic folks having a good time making their weird little comics. You probably haven't heard of much in the catalog, that's PERFECT in the context of webcomics that's where the GOOD SHIT is. Finding something like this is A Gift go dig around in the longboxes for a while.

Then a few people have pointed me in the direction of the KNIFEBEETLE collective and that's neat too! Most of the comics there are already fairly well-known, but the vibes are excellent and I haven't seen a lot of talk about the collective /itself/ outside folks already in the know. I think it's important for this sort of thing to be more visible to folks who aren't terminally steeped in webcomic culture already so here I am telling you about it. You were probably reading several of these before I suggested it, but that's how a webring works! For it to do its job you should take those bigger creators' tacit recommendation of the less popular titles as a sign to go read something new and strange. Wild, I know these are practices held over from the old internet, but I think we should try and bring them back.

Lastly, I want to mention Spiderforest, which is a collective (slightly different from a webring) BUT still a very cool project readers starved for new stuff should pay attention to.

You've probably seen Spiderforest kicking around for a long time already; they're wonderful and have always been an overall positive force in the community in my experience. They really focus on building up a community, and especially welcoming newcomers and helping them get their feet under them. Full disclosure, I've been asked to apply by a few different folks over the years and the only reason I never did is I don't have the ability to participate in their forums and such as frequently as they want their creators to; it's a very good system (from my outside perspective) that might contribute to the community staying mostly healthy in ways that art communities usually don't and I appreciate it a lot!

ANYWAYS that's all I got for now, just trying to balance out some bad feelings I've been having by talking about some good stuff. Please go binge an archive this week.

#long post #contrary to what i say i do love webcomics so fucking much #there are Reasons i'm fucking angry all the time lmao

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cainluvr69 · 6 months ago

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"Say Aah!" Cain SSR Card Story - The Pinnacle of Deep Frying

Cain: Whew, we sure have walked a lot. Master Sage, you're not too worn out, are you?

Akira: I'm okay. I am getting a little hungry, though…

Cain: I'm definitely feeling it, too. I'm pretty sure I saw a food stall back down that alley. Let's go check it out.

✦✧☾✧✦

Akira: Mm, is that smell oil…? Then this stall must be…

Shopkeeper: Welcome, welcome! Step right up!

Cain: Hey, whatcha selling here?

Shopekeeper: "What," you ask… Well, that's a bit rough to answer. Might as well say anything, 'cause I'll deep fry anything!

Cain: …Anything, you say?

Shopkeeper: Eeyup. I'll fry whatever you want, dear customers, and then give it to you. What do you two want? I'll fry it up for you!

Cain: So, really anything? You've got a hell of a business model. Then I'll take a nice juicy cut of bacon!

Shopkeeper: You got it. And for you?

Akira: Umm, I guess I'll take a veggie or two.

Shopkeeper: Gotcha, one nice cut of bacon and our finest vegetables! Both together will be 300 yen.

Cain pulled out his wallet, and as he handed it over, he very casually and naturally touched the stall owner's hand.

Shopkeeper: Alright, now sit back 'n watch!

The shopkeeper grinned and popped a thick slice of bacon and a nougat yam into his pot of oil.

Cain: Man, I love deep fried stuff. I totally get wanting to deep fry anything and everything you can.

Akira: You sure have done that whenever you got the chance, as I recall…

Shopkeeper: Oh, that right? I feel like you 'n me could get along, kid! Here ya go, deep fried to perfection. Here's your bacon.

Cain: Thank you. …Well, don't mind if I do. Damn, that's good! Gimme another!

Shopkeeper: Ahaha! You practically inhaled that thing. Well, gimme just a second. Here's your nougat yam.

Akira: Thank you very much. Now, let me try it…

Mithra: What is that?

Akira: Oh!

Mithra suddenly appeared next to me and snatched my yam out of my hand.

Mithra: Chomp munch. How disappointing. My burnt charcoal has much more impact.

Cain: Hey man, you can't just show up and start picking a fight like that. And while I'm at it, that was the Sage's, not yours.

Mithra: It's their fault for letting their guard down. Besides, they should have something much tastier, with much more impact. In fact, it's terribly inconsiderate of them that they didn't consider doing this.

Akira: (That's an absolutely wild thing to just say like that…)

Shopkeeper: Impact, you say… Well, I guess it's possible that focusing so much on my deep frying means I let flavor fall by the wayside. I ain't as popular as some of the other stalls around here, and I don't get much in the way of feedback, so thank ya kindly for being so upfront about it.

Cain: Mister… Hey, would it be alright if I helped you with your shop?

Shopkeeper: Huh…?

Cain: We're comrades in the art of deep frying. I want to learn whatever I can from you.

Shopkeeper: Well, I'd appreciate the help. Welcome to the team.

Cain: Nice! Well then, let's get right to it… Do you think trying to put more flavor into the coating?

Akira: That sounds like it might be a good idea. Since deep fried food can be a little hard on the stomach, how about mixing in something nice and refreshing? Like how karaage usually comes with lemon slices…

Shopkeeper: I see, I see… Well, let's give it a try!

✦✧☾✧✦

Shopkeeper: And done! Some lightly fried vinegar fish, ready to serve! I added some ultramarine lemon juice to the batter. Here, try it!

Cain: Here we go…

Akira: Thank you very much.

The three of us took a bite of our respective fried fish.

Akira: (…Th-this is…)

Cain: Damn, that's sour!

Mithra: This is much more stimulating, though lightly frying it was unnecessary in my opinion.

Akira: It definitely packs a punch now, but maybe we could make it a little bit more…mellow…?

Cain: We're definitely going in the right direction. There's still something missing, but we're almost there…to peak deliciousness… I know! Mithra, we top this with that secret sauce of yours?

Mithra: Secret…? Oh, you mean this.

Mithra pulled a bottled labeled MAGIC SAUCE out of thin air.

Shopkeeper: Wh-where'd you pull that from…?!

The shopkeepers eyes went wide, and Cain and I frantically exchanged glances.

Akira: (We're in Eastern Country, so it'd be really really bad if it gets out that they're wizards…!) H-H-He's really good at sleight of hand type tricks! This guy, master of stage magic! He loves to surprise people so he always keeps a bottle up his sleeve, if you know what I mean!!

Cain: Yeah, yep! He always pulls it off so cool and casual, right?!

Mithra: What are you two talking about? This is basic magi--momph.

Cain: Anyways, moving on! The sauce he's got here tastes amazing on everything. Wanna give it a try?

Shopkeeper: On everything, you say? Is there really a sauce out there like that? Sounds downright magical.

Mithra: Of course it does. This is my handmade universal sauce.

Cain: C'mon, try it out.

At Cain's urging, we all put some of the sauce onto our fried fish.

Akira: (It's so good. Yakiniku sauce coming in clutch once again…)

Shopkeeper: Th-this flavor…! Y-you gotta tell me! How do I make this sauce?!

Mithra: You can't.

Shopkeeper: Why not?!

Mithra: Because you're nothing but a human--

Cain: Uhhhhhhhh hey! It's actually because the ingredients are really hard to get! It's a real specialty product!

Shopkeeper: Oh, I see… Then would you be willing to part with some? I'll pay you, I've got cash!

Mithra: I refuse. Making more of it would be such a bother.

Shopkeeper: No… It was such a vivid, perfect flavor…

Cain: Well, here's my thought. Why not try to make your own version of it? You're a chef, and you've got a lot experience with, y'know, eating things and examining the flavors, right? I'm sure you can rediscover this sauce's flavor.

Akira: I'd like to help you in this endeavor, too!

Shopkeeper: Well, ya got me. Let me try my hand at it!

✦✧☾✧✦

Shopkeeper: I think I've gotten the base flavor pretty close… What do you think?

The sauce the shopkeeper made certainly looked like Mithra's universal sauce. As for the flavor…

Cain: Mm, something's missing, I think.

Mithra: Yes. Something definitely is.

Akira: I think maybe it's that it's not, like, thick enough? But just a little thicker might be perfect…

Shopkeeper: You sure are eloquent, kiddo. I want to keep you as my taste tester!

Akira: M-me?!

✦✧☾✧✦

We ended up trying several different variations of sauces on different deep fried foods in a lengthy process of trial and error. At some point, Mithra got bored of stuffing himself with fried foods and wandered off.

Shopkeeper: Alright, next up is fried macaroni stalks! Still good to try it?

Akira: Yes. …Here goes. (The sauce counteracts the macaroni stalks' bitterness, but it still feels like something's missing…) (And I've eaten so many things, my stomach feels like it's going to burst…)

Cain: …

Cain glanced over at me with my hand on my belly, and licked a drop of sauce off of one of his fingers.

Cain: Why not add some kind of oil? Like, a climactic oil versus oil battle. You know, like how deep frying stuff plain in butter is really good.

Shopkeeper: No batter, just butter… Damn, I think you might really be onto something here!

Cain: I think the actual flavor of the sauce is spot-on at this point. Other than that, we just need to finish ironing out the proper mellowness and then we're done.

Akira: I think adding some extra oil would be good, too…

The shopkeeper added a few drops of his special, flavorful oil and mixed it in…

Akira: Alright, time for a taste… Mm! This is it!! (This smell, this flavor, it's spot-on yakiniku sauce!) This is it, this is it…! It's a little different from Mithra's magic sauce, but it's really close…this is the universal sauce!

Shopkeeper: Really?!

Cain: You did it!

Shopkeeper: I gotta thank that lad that let me taste this in the first place!

Cain: We'll be sure to tell him.

Shopkeeper: Thank ya kindly. I was so focused on perfecting the art of frying that I forgot to pay attention to the flavor, even though that's what I should've been thinking about if I wanted to make this place more successful. Y'know, I was just about at the end of my rope, thinkin' there was just no helping that I wasn't getting customers since I only deep fried things, but as a fellow afficionado of all things deep-fried…you've given me hope.

Cain: I mean, what else was I gonna do? I'm already looking forward to the next time we come out to this neck of the woods and I get to drop by your stall again.

Akira: Same here. We'll be sure to remember you.

Shopkeeper: And I, you! I'll prepare a deep fried full course meal for you any day!

Akira: (Thank goodness, Cain looks really satisfied, too…!)

✦✧☾✧✦

Akira: (But, my gosh, I feel full… I guess we went a little too crazy with the fried foods…)

Cain: You okay, Master Sage?

Akira: Yeah. Just thinking I might've overeaten a little…

Cain: How about we find something light to eat to give your palate a refresher?

Akira: ?! N-no, I'm okay! I feel like if I eat anything else, I'm going to pop… But thank you for the thought.

Cain: Haha. Don't worry, I was just joking. Sorry for making you part of that whole escapade.

Akira: Oh, no, I enjoyed it! Trying to figure out the ingredients for the perfect sauce was really fun.

Cain: I'm happy to hear that. Mithra's special sauce was a big help, but so was your spot-on food reviews.

Akira: I'm really happy that shopkeeper ended up pleased with the results, too.

Cain: Yeah. I hope the next time we come by, that stall's got a big line in front of it.

Akira: And I'll make sure that I don't eat too much…!

Cain: Ahaha, good plan!

****TL Notes: karaage is a type of fried chicken, but distinct enough from what most english speakers picture when they think of fried chicken that i left it as-is. squeezing a lemon slice over it or adding a few drops of vinegar really makes it pop. yakiniku is grilled meat that's typically done over a charcoal stove and topped with, indeed, a particular savory sauce.

Training Episode: The Deliciousness of Killing Two Birds with One Stone!

Akira: Cain? What are you doing in the kitchen?

Cain: Oh, Master Sage. I was craving some good ol' deep fried good and was just about to whip something up. You want any?

Akira: Fried food cravings…?

Cain: Ever since we helped out that fried food stand back in the Town of Blue Scales, I've been wanting to branch out and try deep frying more stuff.

Akira: We sure did eat a lot of fried foods then…

Cain: That said, I still haven't found anything that beats deep fried butter. So there's just this lack of satisfaction I can't get rid of… Can you think of anything good to try? Something unexpected!

Akira: Something delicious, but unexpected… How about ice cream?

Cain: Ice cream…? That's definitely out of left field. Wouldn't it melt if I tried to deep fry it?

Akira: I'm pretty sure there's something you can do to make sure it doesn't melt…

Cain: I see… Well then, let's embark upon a journey to fell the mystery of deep fried ice cream! Eating something warm and cold at the same time is really efficient. Two birds, one stone!

Akira: But if I can't remember how to do it, it's going to take us a long time to figure it out on our own…

Cain: You don't need to force yourself to or anything.

Akira: Huh?

Cain: You know I like spending time with you, Master Sage.

#.mhyktl #.cardtl #cain knightley #rip cain you would've loved american festival foods #this card story is like almost twice as long as the last event chapter i worked on which is insane to me #also i'm working on big event tls again. everyone rejoice

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callalillywrites · 3 months ago

Text

In Need of a Distraction

Written for @flufftober's Fluff Bingo. D3 - Missing the Other (tweaked to Missing Someone).

Frank Adler Masterlist | Fluff Bingo Masterlist | Main Masterlist

Pairing: Frank Adler x F!Reader

Word Count: 1808

Summary: You knew Frank wouldn't handle having Mary gone for a week, so you prepared a little surprise to help him cope. It might just help you, too.

Warnings: cranky Frank; death mentioned (reader's family members; brief grief; missing Mary (both Frank and Reader); fluff

A/N: Welcome to my first official Frank Adler fic. I'm definitely looking forward to writing more for this cranky boy.

I do not give permission to have my works copied, translated, reposted, or fed into an AI machine.

*****

Frank checked his watch for the tenth time before sliding towards the front window.

You had to hide your smile behind the cards in your hands.

The two of you had been playing cards for the past couple of hours. Though, playing might be a bit of a stretch as Mary had taken off for her girl troop's all-week trip shortly after you started. Frank, for his part, had managed to keep himself fairly present for the next thirty or so minutes. After that though, things started to dip, his attention span waning with every passing minute.

A sigh escaped him while his mouth slid into a deeper frown.

Oh, he was really getting cranky, you couldn't help noting.

"You know she'll be okay," you said softly, hoping to distract him.

He nodded, but he didn't stop checking his watch or watching the window.

Standing abruptly, he began pacing the length of the living room. His cards remained face down on the table, his mind clearly forgetting the game you'd been playing.

"She has spent the night away from you several times over the years. What's a few more days tacked on?"

Mary's weekend routine had been something you learned quite early on in your acquaintance with the Adler duo. Friday nights saw Mary under Roberta's care so Frank could have one night to himself and enjoy his bachelor status. That soon grew to two nights when you took over Saturday nights as your friendship with one cranky Frank grew.

Those Saturday nights had proved fun and quite eye-opening. Super smart and typical attitude to boot sure, Mary was a real sweetheart and knew you cared about her and Frank. You never made a secret about how much you cared about them, especially Mary. The young girl was just too sweet not to fall in love with her.

Frank proved the harder of the two to get to know, but you'd been slowly and steadily knocking down his walls. It'd taken a lot for him to trust you with Mary, but you've never let him down once he did. You also made sure he knew he could lean on you when he needed another person in his corner. That time really came when his mother entered the picture and tried to take Mary from him.

It was a time that still got you hot under the collar if you thought about it too long.

In the end, Frank was able to keep custody of Mary. It was something you knew he didn't take for granted, not with how close he'd come to losing her. She was his entire world since the day he became her de facto guardian. You had no doubts she'd remain his whole world forever. If all you could claim was a small piece of it, then so be it. You were content.

"She's never been so far for so long," he grumbled, his words almost too soft for you to catch. He continued to pace for another minute or so before dropping back into his chair. His cards remained on the table in front of him, forgotten entirely. His hand came up and scrubbed down his face. A moment later, he's pushed himself out of his chair to pace some more.

No way were the two of you finishing your game.

You let out a groan as you picked up his hand and noted how bad it was compared to yours. A lost win if ever there was one. With the hand you had, you'd already been banking on him owing you a great favor. It hurt to see that gone by the wayside at that point.

Win some, lose some, you guessed.

At least, you still had a little trick up your sleeve.

"Oh, no, hey, we were still playing," Frank said, catching you putting up the cards in the drawer of a side table near your chair. "I wasn't…"

You shook your head. "It's fine. Besides, something told me you'd need a distraction. Wanna take a drive with me? I wanna show you something."

The way Frank hesitated, you feared he'd decline your offer, putting your surprise off another day.

Thankfully, you'd learned a trick from Mary and put that trick to good use.

"No, not you, too," Frank groused, his head dropping to his chest. When he blew out a breath, you knew you'd won as he muttered, "Fine, fine, I'll go with you, but put that pout away. I hate it."

Yet, the look he gave you when he finally glanced up again told you he didn't mind the pout so much.

Grinning, you took his hand and practically dragged out of the house and into his old, beatup truck. You tossed him the keys which you'd snatched on the way out and merely raised a brow when he continued to sit and stare at you.

"Anyone ever tell you how pushy you are?" he asked, his hand reaching up with the keys and eventually turning the ignition.

The truck came to life while you flashed him your best grin, saying, "Yeah, I think I've heard that once or twice. You gotta problem with me being pushy?"

"Nah, there are worse traits out there," he said, flashing you one of his smirks before backing out of the drive. "Which way?"

Over the next several minutes, you guided him through the darkening streets until he pulled into the marina where he used to work. A few more turns later, he parked the truck outside the workshop, his gaze turning to you, questioning.

"Come on. It's not much further."

You unbuckled and shot him a sly grin, slipping out of the truck. When he joined you at the front of his truck, you grabbed his arm and tugged him around the corner and down one of the aisles of the marina. Excitement buzzed through your veins at the surprise you knew was waiting your arrival. It arrived just that morning and in better shape than you could've hoped for after so many years locked away, gathering dust.

Seeing the old boat docked in its new slip, you allowed yourself a soft squeal.

That certainly caught Frank's attention. His attention, which had been focused on you, shifted to the boat close to where you stopped.

"Ta-da," you exclaimed, letting go his arm and throwing both of yours to encompass the boat itself.

His gaze swept over the boat, noting every flaw and detail that needed work. His jaw ticked as he swallowed back the first thing that came to his mind.

You knew this because his gaze trailed over to you and he cringed. If anyone else had brought him this boat, you could well imagine his initial reaction. After all, you'd been privy to it a few times over. But no, this was you, and you were his friend. Even if the urge was there, he'd learned to play nicer with his small group of friends.

"It's a boat," he finally said, going with the obvious.

That was enough to pull a chuckle from you. "Of course, it's a boat, silly."

"Not in the best shape," he added, cautiously.

You nodded.

"I know. It was my dad's. When he died, my uncle promised to take care of it, but he kinda lost interest in them after losing my dad. It's been sitting in storage since." You had to swallow as memories worked themselves to the surface, but you shook them to the side. Meeting Frank's sympathetic gaze, you managed to tilt your lips into some semblance of a smile. "In its prime, my dad would take me out every weekend. We'd fish or simply cruise the lake, spending some hours together. It was a wonderful time. Some of my favorite memories happened on those weekends."

Frank didn't say anything, but he moved closer. One hand skimmed over the port-side gunnel, checking its condition. The other ran down the hull and noted a few concerns based on the way his brows scrunched together.

You simply watched him at work.

While it'd been a couple years since he'd worked on boats full time, you knew he still helped out occasionally at the marina. Usually, he did for some extra cash to help pad the account he'd started for Mary and her future. Sometimes, he'd splurge with the money he made, taking you and Mary out to eat at one of the nicer restaurants in town.

After a few minutes, he carefully hopped over the hull and into the heart of your dad's boat. He checked over everything bow to stern, noting every detail that'd need attention. His hands and gaze missed nothing. A lot of time was spent near the stern with him crouched down to take in the dual engines and their conditions.

When he finally came back to you, he didn't beat around the bush as he said, "It's a lot of work, but it's salvageable. Not gonna be cheap though, but I can try and find some deals. She'll be a beautiful addition to this place once she's fixed up though."

"Money's not an issue," you said, bouncing on your feet, "but does that mean you'll do it?"

Frank's gaze swept over the boat before he nodded, a small grin peeking through. "Yeah, I'll do it, but you're going to help me."

"Wouldn't have it any other way. Figured this would be a good way to pass the empty hours this week. Maybe it'll help us miss Mary a little less. If we get far enough, we can take it out with her next weekend. Possibly? See how it runs? I think it deserves to make some new memories, don't you?"

His grin widened a bit. "Yeah?"

"Yeah."

Before you could make out his intent, Frank had you wrapped in his arms and lifted you off your feet. His bearded cheek tickled yours while his lips found yours and pressed a quick but promising kiss against them. The first time he'd ever done that in your years of friendship.

When he pulled back, his grin was so wide it had to hurt as he murmured, "You're very hard not to love, know that?"

"Am I?" you asked though your own grin grew to match his. "You're not so hard to love, either. I mean, you have Mary as your biggest selling point, but you're not so bad yourself."

"You really love her, don't you?"

You nodded. "Yeah, and her uncle, too. In case he was wondering."

"He was," Frank said, pressing another kiss to your lips.

And another and another until you were practically dizzy for him.

Thoughts of Mary and missing her slipped from your minds. They were sure to come back sooner or later, but you two were happy to have these new developments to stave off those thoughts.

#flufftober #fluffbingo #gifted 2017 #missing the other #frank adler #frank adler x reader #x female reader #missing someone

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