#well...it's only twenty minutes

[swan2swan]

Cartoons won, but at What Cost?

[strigimorphaes]

A quick ficlet for the 6th stage of Paris-Nice - mads/mattias & josh. @mundanememory mads and mattias kissing lets talk about it

Josh has started shaking, and maybe the cold's doing something to his head and better judgement since he's not headed back to his own team bus. He's drifting towards the blue-yellow-red blotch at the other end of the street, barely able to make it out through the rain on his glasses. He takes them off along with his helmet to greet the Lidl-Trek guys hanging out in front of it. Maybe their better judgement's off too, if they're choosing to stand outside under this little canopy-thing instead of being inside with the heating on.

"Hey," one of them says. "Congratulations on second."

"Thanks," Josh answers, teeth clattering a little. How annoying, when he's trying to look cool. "Is Mads around?"

"Why?"

"I wanted to ask him something about the sprint, like, and say congratulations, too."

He wants to know how close he came to beating Mads, and to use this chance, this sudden importance at the finish, to maybe get to know some of his competitors and, hopefully, feel like a real part of this part of the peloton, the big boys who are in contention for monuments. A little bit of fake it 'till you make it, a little but of curiosity about what kind of conversation he might have with a guy like Mads after a stage like this. Maybe Mads will tell him what he did bad or good in a way that's different than his own DS. He wants something more than a handshake in any case, something that makes the day feel finished.

The Lidl-Trek guy - hard to tell them apart when they're all so bundled up and weathered - says, "He's in the bus, but now's not a good time. Him and Skjelmose are getting changed."

"Did he kick you all out for that?" Josh asks. He can't imagine willingly standing around in this cold.

"Nah," says another one - Kirsch? Either way he crosses his arms and adds, "Asked nicely, more like. And when you win the stage, you earn ten minutes of peace. It's okay, he buys the round when we celebrate after."

Josh looks past them to the curtains at the entrance to the bus. The windows are dark so he can't see anything inside. It's his luck that a Eurosport guy with a microphone suddenly approaches, eager to hear about the team's thoughts on the day. With the same feeling in his body as when he jumps the gap between two groups on the road, Josh steps behind their backs, using the distraction to duck inside.

He pauses on the stairs as the curtain falls behind him.

He can't hear talking or laughter. Not the click-clack of shoes or any zippers.

It's just whispering and then - a little soft, wet sound.

Josh takes two more steps up the little set of stairs to poke his head out, but of course he's too big to hide. He gets a fine view of the aisle with the seats on either side all the way down to the back where there's a little changing area, padded benches and storage for the clothes, and Mads and Mattias have been changing, sure, but they've not changed into anything new yet. Mads is sitting with his back to the wall, jersey off and bib straps hanging at his waist, and Mattias is on his lap, naked from the waist up, too, his back curved as he bends forwards to kiss Mads' cheek before nestling his face into the crook of Mads' neck. Mads' hands are on Mattias' back, petting him, holding him, warming him up. Josh can see every knob of Mattias' spine, every rib.

"One more minute," Mads says, his eyes closed as he captures Mattias' lips again. "Or are the boys getting impatient?"

Josh makes a noise that's a result of not knowing whether to say sorry or I'm not one of your boys or what or hey or fuck.

Then Mads looks at him past Mattias' shoulder, realizing it wasn't a Lidl-guy coming in, and Mattias twists to look, too. Mattias looks afraid for a second, and then Mads strokes his back again and he calms down. Mads looks like he might tell his boys to make sure Josh never sees daylight again if he talks. Josh is kind of impressed with how good at communicating Mads is, saying all that with just a glance.

"Sorry, I'll see myself out," Josh says. He steps backwards, almost stumbling. "I, uh - "

"Stop," Mads tells him. "You can't leave looking like that, man."

"Like what?"

"Like I threw a shoe at you or insulted your mother the moment you came in the door. Stay here until you've calmed down and look normal, like we've just had a chat. I don't want the whole fucking world to think I did something to fuck you up."

Josh nods. he tries to breathe calmly while Mattias slides off Mads' lap, sitting down on the bench next to him and pulling on a fresh shirt and a hoodie.

"We just have our own way of celebrating," Mattias says.

Mads gets up, grabbing a fresh shirt as well. He pats Mattias on the shoulder - not like he does it to others, Josh notices, not friendly and hard, but slowly to let Mattias feel the heat of his palm and the gentleness in it. Then Mads comes down the aisle, and even though he's that much shorter and narrower than Josh he doesn't feel that way. He gestures for Josh to sit, bringing them at eye level or with Josh a little lower.

"You stay quiet, right?" Mads says.

Josh nods. Then he can't help himself but ask, keeping his voice low enough that Mattias won't hear, - "Is it like, you're together? Or is it more like - I don't know, but I heard on my team, sometimes, there's kind of a - not really hazing, but mean things, you know, between the big guys and the ones that are... lower in the hierarchy."

He just wants to make sense of what he saw.

Mads smiles. "Nah, it's love, Josh."

Which - Josh wouldn't have considered that an hour ago when they were pushing like mad, and he was watching Mads and Mattias take their turns, surrounded by other madmen in rain jackets with trembling hands. He hadn't thought that people could be close in that way, too, in the peloton. He thought you got a model girlfriend or a long-suffering wife or dedicated yourself entirely to the sport. That those were the options. He must be staring into space while he's realizing that there's this , too, because Mads makes an expression like Josh looks funny.

"Now get out of the bus," Mads tells him. "We can talk some other time."

"Yeah," Josh says. He's glad the seats have handles so he can hold onto something and pulls himself up. It's going to be a whole thing to sit back at his own bus holding this knowledge inside him, and he pauses for a moment to find his footing -

"Atta boy," Mads says, and puts a hand on Josh's shoulder, leaning in for a kiss on the cheek that's definetely a mocking joke played on Josh, something to fluster him and make him leave very very quickly and confused and blushing.

Outside, the Lidl-Trek riders see Josh's red face and laugh loud enough that Mads has to hear it inside the bus.

Josh hurries to his own mates, far warmer than before.

[fogdraws]

Watching the soviet Holmes adaptation and in love with Watson........ My only complain is that he eats like that sad rat video. The one in which the rat is eating a m&m or something like that. Which I can't tell if it really is a complain or just... a comment of notability

[aeolianblues]

pop stars aren't born in the 70s anymore like they used to be. These days they're born in a year uncomfortably close to my own which makes me clutch my chest and cry out

[sodrippy]

adhd time management is so abysmal i wake up at 6am thinking "perfect ill have a little time to myself, then breakfast, and i can start work an hour early too!" now its 8.50am and im just getting set up to start work

[byanyan]

something about byan picking up smoking at like 14 or 15 bc they're the epitome of the delinquent kid and they thought it was cool and edgy... something about them effectively forcing themself into the habit in part to rebel against everyone telling them not to but also there's just something about the feeling of control over themself and their life in this act of rebellion... something about them keeping the habit not only because it becomes an addiction, but also because there's something so poetically fitting about how self destructive this little act of rebellion, this forceful grab for control over their own life ultimately is... something about burning twice as bright but having half the time and ultimately being the one to snuff their own flame... idk it's on my mind today

[vampirecatboy]

what if i just. started writing barracuda again. what if i didn't leave it unfinished forever. what if i actually regained interest in it. what then.

[anti-fairy-world]

You know, while we don't think Stuck In My Head/Mind The Gap were bad episodes or anything, we kinda wish they'd been cut in favor of making that time the part one to The Battle of Big Wand, with the actually episode being part two. Make it a whole big forty to forty-five special instead of trying to fit it with a twenty-two to twenty-three minute run time

We actually like everything they were trying to do with the special, but we just wish they had more time to flesh things out and play around with the jokes between the plot moments. The writers probably didn't really have much of a choice with the time they were given to work with and had to prioritize where screen time was used, and honestly they did what they could, but sometimes it felt like 'and now this is happening so we can get moving with the plot'

[guinevereslancelot]

a koi pond for your dash:

❀ 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 ༄ ❀ 𓆝 𓆟 ༄ ❀ 𓆞 𓆝 ❀ ༄ ﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

[sunkissedliterarylightofchrist]

I am in literal physical pain you guys, between being sick and then the weather I haven't been running in a WEEK I am slowly going insane.

[pagesofkenna]

Finally went through and rearranged my podcasts (I'm subscribed to way too many podcasts

Green = podcasts I'm actively keeping up with whenever they post (also basically in order of which I'm most anxious for new episodes for currently)

Blue = podcasts I'm kinda keeping up with, or newly added and slowly catching up on

Purple = podcasts I'm not really keeping up with but will occasionally check in on if I need something different to fill the air

Red = podcasts which aren't actively posting/are on hiatus and which I'm waiting for new episodes of

Orange = podcasts which aren't posting and I don't really expect new episodes of, but I want to stay subscribed to Just In Case

Yellow = podcasts I've newly subscribed to that I either haven't tried yet or don't have time to invest in yet

[the-worms-in-your-bones]

I should really finish at least one of my fics before starting a new one, however

[loumauve]

I snapped today at work, and by snapped I mean I politely commented on a help desk ticket by summing up an mess of an (type of) issue that's come up for at least the fourth time in the 2+ months I've been managing user accounts, and asked the person responsible to fix it (himself for once) because last time I fixed his mess-up it took me two whole days to work out the details with at least four other colleagues from different departments and I really don't want to do it again. there's other shit that needs doing, I've been working 10+ hour days for most of this week already, so I need to cut down not add on more.

(good thing tho - at least we managed to fix the issue where the dataset of a newer employee got mixed up with another one of the same name and therefore wasn't able to apply for any of the access/accounts she needed. technically not entirely my area but it does impact us not being allowed to create an account for her so I figured I might as well track that issue down. took three days and at least three other people, but hey - it should all work out now. yay for that)

[frankensteincest]

Salò thoughts ten days after watching it because I’ve finally processed it.

the four fascists calling themselves ‘the true anarachists’, nominally advocating for social freedom, praising ‘sodomy’ for its subversive nature and ability to collapse social and moral boundaries, art and aestheticism to facilitate their activities — all of it building up to posit that all acts are morally neutral in and of themselves & that their morality is dependent on who propagates them, in what context, and to what effects. brilliant and devastating. very in line with the bibliography at the beginning of the film.

‘they don’t realise that the bourgeoisie has never hesitated to kill its children’ rawest line in film probably

the musician(?) was my favourite character for her role in the story: choosing hollow humour to drown out her brief moment of outspoken horror during the wedding + her ‘suddenly’ realising the gravity of the situation and ending her life were a good representation of apathy that does not exempt one from complicity.

the closing scene and the dream of Marguerite outside of all this horror but still connected to it. I want to kms

[lightpickles]

this farmer had a prophetic vision during raeger's white flower event!

[headspacedad]

The AI future is here: love, death and the AI takeover in China