#when bram exists

[theproblemcallednight]

remember that one bram scene (tw blood)

i redrew it

the og

[myfanfictiongarden]

8th of May

You all been sleeping on the fact that Jonathan needs BARELY THREE DAYS to realise that he is a prisoner and that the Count is not human.

[yukaii]

these dudes gay! good for them good for them!

[vremus]

reading and annotating dracula for my ap lit class is insane bc why tf have i determined that if anyone falls ill they are gay

[aletterinthenameofsanity]

Y'know, there's this gripe I've had for years that really frustrates me, and it has to do with Love, Simon and people joking about it and calling it too-pg and designed-for-straight-people and all the like. (A similar thing has happened to Heartstopper, but that's another conversation.)

I saw Love, Simon in theaters when it came out my senior year in high school. I saw it three times, once with my friends/parents on opening night, once with my brother over spring break, and once with my grandparents.

On opening night, the air in the room was electric. It was palpable. Half the heads in there were dyed various colors. Queer kids were holding hands. We were all crying and laughing and cheering as a group. My friends grabbed my hands at the part where Simon was outed and didn't let go until his parents were saying that they accepted him. My friend came out to me as non-binary. Another person in our group admitted that she had feelings for girls. It was incredible. I left shaking. This was the first mainstream queer romance movie that had ever been produced by one of the main five studios, and I know that sounds like another "first queer character from Disney" bit but you have to understand that even in 2018 this was groundbreaking. Getting to have a sweet queer rom-com where the main character was told that he got "to breathe now" after coming out meant so much to me and my friends.

But also, from a designed-for-straight-people POV (which, to be frank, it was written by a bisexual author and directed by a gay man, this was not designed for straight audiences), why is it a bad thing that it appealed to the widest possible audience? That it could make my parents and grandparents see things in a new light? My stepdad wasn't at all interested in rom-coms but he saw it with me because it was something I cared about and he hugged me when we came out of the theater. My very Catholic grandparents watched it with me and though my grandpa said he still didn't quite understand the whole 'gay thing,' all he wanted was for me to be happy and to have a happy ending like Simon did. My Nana actually cried when Simon came out and squeeze my hand when his mother told him he could breathe.

And when Martin blackmailed Simon, my mom, badass ally that she is, literally hissed "Dropkick him. Dropkick him in the balls" leading to multiple queer kids in the audience to laugh or smile. Having my parents there- the only parents, by the way, out of my group of queer and questioning friends- made multiple people realize that supportive adults were out there. That parents like those in Love, Simon do exist in real life.

When people complain about Heartstopper not being realistic or Love, Simon being too cutesy, I remember seeing Love, Simon on opening night. I remember my friend coming out and my stepdad hugging me and my mom defending us through this character. I remember the cheers that went through the audience when Bram and Simon kissed and the chatter in the foyer after the movie was over and the way that this movie made me understand that happy endings do exist.

Queer kids need happy endings. Straight people need entry points to becoming allies. Both of these things can come together in beautiful ways. They can find out about more queer culture later, but for now, let them have this. Let them all have a glimpse at a better, happier world. Let them have queer joy.

[foggymyst]

Vampires aren’t real. That’s a fact that everyone can agree on. They don’t exist. They’re mythical beings that have been around for thousands of years. But you’ve never exactly seen one, have you? 

At least. You haven’t seen one in the way of novels or books. But there are plenty of kinds of vampires. 

For instance, you’re probably most familiar with the blood-sucking vampires in famous works such as Bram Stoker's Dracula, Hotel Transylvania, and even the infamous Twilight. But that’s fake. Fantasy. Not real. 

Vampires aren’t real. That’s a fact. At least, not the blood sucking kind. 

But have you ever been sitting with someone? And they just blabber on and on and on. No matter how much you try to leave, to pull your attention away, ignore them, they just bring your attention right back.

Sometimes they even capture you with their eyes. Kind of like how I’ll capture you with a spiral.

But that’s okay. You don’t mind. You like when I talk. You like when I go on and on about how silly people are for believing in vampires.

Even as you feel your energy just draining away.

The more I talk and talk.

The more I tell you.

The sleepier you get.

The harder it gets to focus. 

But hey, I’ll snap in front of you, redirect your focus to me

Focus, silly. I’m trying to tell you something. 

It’s rude to doze off when people are talking.

You have to focus on me. 

On my words.

On my spiral.

Focusing as though they were my eyes.

I’m talking and you’re just dozing off. How impolite. 

You’re supposed to listen to me. 

Focus on me. 

Focus on my spiral.

Focus on my words.

Focus on me, me, me.

That’s it. There we go.

You have to remember to listen.

So you can obey. So you can obey me.

Now, as I was saying, vampires. 

They aren’t real. But energy vampires. 

Vampires that take your energy. 

Make you sleepy, drowsy, dizzy, woozy.

Make you weak, vulnerable, obedient, dazed.

Those are very much real.

And you… Well, you’re talking to one. 

So be a good little prey, a good little thrall. 

And sleep for your mistress.

Good thrall~.

[melliemell]

Pairing: Jouno x reader

Contents: NSFW, hate sex, penetration (reader receiving), forced intimacy due to circumstance/convenience's sake, horny people stuck in a cell leads to exactly what you think it'd lead to, Approx 3k. words

“Wooh, I believe in you, buddy,” you said, voice hollow. You were lying on the ground, legs stretched against the wall as you tapped your toes together. “You’re so strong and capable, Jouno. What a brain, what determination.”

A scoff followed by, “I have better things to do than rot away pathetically. How’s that going for you?” Jouno did not move from his kneeling position, ear pressed firmly to the ground as he concentrated. 

“Marvelously, actually.” You looked over at Jouno’s hunched back. You could see the bloodied rips of fabric perfectly from that angle. Being stabbed that many times must’ve hurt like hell. “I think I’ve reached a serenity point. Nirvana and all that.”

The panic had subdued from earlier at least. The small room you were both confined in was just as suffocating, yes, but your body felt light. It was nothing compared to the shock of being thrust into consciousness suddenly, the sensation of your muscles twitch and move as you commanded them still oddly weird. The vampiric influence had lifted somehow, leaving freedom in its wake.

Something had happened. 

But your memories felt like distant dreams. Your body barely registered as your own, even as you watched your fingers flex and stretch before your eyes.

“Your delusions are not amusing me at the moment,” Jouno said. You could tell his exasperation was building, tapping against the floor and walls as he moved about. It was probably a first his senses weren’t quite as sharp as they used to be.

“You’re not much different. I doubt you could hear anything; there’s no one down here besides us,” you said, rolling over to lie on your side.

“It’s not down here I’m concerned with. Something’s happening at the airport.”

“I figured that much. Lucky us.”

“Your smart remarks aren’t as clever as you think. Your precious Agency could very well be in danger as well.”

That piqued your interest. Jouno despised all of you, and here he was–not throwing slander at your face about them. Peculiar. 

It was all of no use though. Not until you got your abilities under control, the effect of Bram’s vampirism dulling them enough to barely register they even existed. The room was locked shut, you tried enough times the both of you but the metal did not even budge.

What was left was to wait. And hope, maybe. 

“You giving up now?” you asked after what felt like hours of Jouno moving around you, pushing at places you doubted would suddenly make a hidden door appear. His shoulders were tense, hands crossed tight as he oozed restlessness in buckets. 

Jouno did not turn to you, but he raised his head to the ceiling with a sigh. “Your voice is annoying me, please stop breathing.” 

You tapped the ground beside you. “I’m good, thank you. Want a seat?”

“As if.”

Your palm moved against the rough stone. You observed it intently. “I’ll consider breaking us out…” You pushed firmly, feeling energy surge through your fingertips before a small crack formed into the surface. “If you ask me nicely.”

In your full strength, you could cause a whole tremor to pass through the building. Shatter an entire wall. But now–this was the best you could do.

Jouno turned to you, smiling gently. “Oh my, I would love for you to do that. It’s not below me to ask for help, you know. But I don’t see the point of it when you’re clearly a shameless liar. Or delusional. Take your pick.”

You frowned. “Give me enough time and I might. Your ability’s still trash at working too, isn’t it? ”

His smile pulled into a firm line. He raised his hand up, the tips of his fingers glowing into a soft blue light. Jouno’s frown deepened. “So it feels. Damn it.”

It looked rather pretty in your opinion. But you doubted he’d appreciate that comment.

You fell into silence again. Nothing to be done about anything for now. Jouno looked more concerned about this than you’d have guessed. Fists clenched until he finally sagged against the wall opposite you. His hand remained aflame, small particles constantly dispersing about. 

You almost felt bad for him. Knowing the betrayal he endured and seeing now his inability to right the wrongs. 

It was rather noble of him; to carry all that weight on his shoulders. By choice. Not that it would do him any good, but you couldn’t deny the warm feeling that spread in your chest, heart beating faster at the thought. Men like him were a rarity. If only you didn’t hate each other as much.

Jouno’s brows furrowed. He raised his head at you but only for a moment. He shook it dismissively, turning his face to the side.

You thought he’d be more talkative, to be honest. He certainly enjoyed playing an ass but the more time passed, the less sure you were of that. Despair was one way to put the feeling that oozed from this room.

You rose up languidly, blinking your annoyance away as you strode up the few feet distance between you. Jouno pulled back, raising his head as you hovered over his sitting form.

“What do you want?” he asked.

You dropped dramatically before him, hand resting against your cheek. “Your panic’s sipping into my peace bubble. Stop that.”

Jouno did not look impressed. “Contact security then. I’m sure they’ll be glad to escort one of us to a different accommodation.”

You snorted.“See? If I joke, you joke. Then the mood brightens and all’s good.”

“Aren’t you a charmer? Nothing is good.”

You dropped to sit beside him. “I… I know, okay? I don’t know what the fuck is going on and–” you huddled into yourself, eyes closing, “–I still feel weird and my memory’s fucked and my ability’s useless. I’m trying to keep it together, okay? That’s how I manage it, so don’t be an ass about it.”

Jouno sighed. “Rather pathetic way of handling it.”

“Hey, fuck off!”

“I would if I could.”

And he bumped you into the side with an elbow. You drew back from the pain but when you looked at Jouno, he was smiling. Not the ugly insincere smile, but a small, honest one. At least it looked like it.

Man, this was bad.

You breathed in deep, small droplets of tears forming in your eyes. “Fuck,” you breathed.

“Yeah. I can relate to that,” Jouno said.

“Something’s happening up there. They might be dying and we’re just– here. Doing nothing.”

“What a good way of phrasing it. And you were so calm about it earlier. Your Agency sure could rely on you splendidly as I see.”

Annoyance, sudden and spreading rapidly build up in your chest.“Don’t say that. I’m not–”

“Not what? Cowering away in here? Or should I wait for your full response?” Jouno was mocking you, his patience waning just as quickly as yours.

You turned to face him, palm plastered firmly over his head. “Take that back,” you said, voice like steel.

“Of course you’d want me to do that,” Jouno continued, eating up the whole interaction. His hand flickered, the particles just as bright, if not even more. “I was only sharing the truth.”

“Take–” you leaned in, face flush against his as your eyes blazed, “–that back,” you said, hand flexing firmly into the stone. 

Just as Jouno’s mouth opened, a quick response already on his lips, you heard the sound of cracking. You both froze in place. Small bits of ruble fell on Jouno’s shoulder, your hand digging into the stone so forcefully it had smashed a dent right in it. You watched in wonder the small spider-webbed cracks trailing up and down and everywhere. 

You didn’t notice when you activated your ability. Your chest felt tight and overly alive with emotions.

“Anger me again,” you said before you could process it.

Jouno’s hand had trailed up, feeling the cracks behind him. “That’s an inconvenient way. What are you, feral?”

You ignored him, mind spinning. You’ve never had this before. But abilities were heavily influenced by states; Atsushi was a perfect example of that. Too many emotions and you lose control.

Become dangerous.

You looked at Jouno, eyes blazing with the possibility. 

If you ever needed a more perfect man for the job…

“I hate men like you; it’s like you’re drowning in your self-righteousness to the point of not seeing the truth before you,” you said, serving the plate perfectly before him. “Talks of law from you is like decomposing garbage. It stinks disgustingly.”

Jouno remained silent for a moment, brows furrowed. Then a smile broke on his face, teeth sharp as he said, “Should I praise you? It’s impressive how people like you twist everything to ignore how pathetic they are.”

As if. “If anything you’re the one in need of a reality check. Accusing the Agency when we were clearly framed.”

Jouno pushed forward, getting in your face. “So you’d like to ignore the obvious criminals among you?”

“I would like–” you shoved Jouno back, one palm pushing his chest into the wall, the other cracking up the wall beside his head even further “–the so-called best soldiers in the world focused more on protecting it. What of some petty crimes?”

“Nobody’s above the law,” Jouno said, voice laden with pride that only irked you further. Like he believed himself an uphelder of that statement. 

What a joke.

“Then prove it. As if you could. How could I know you won’t hesitate to strike at your own? How?” you prodded, searching his face for clues.

“I won’t,” Jouno whispered, grabbing onto the hand beside his head, clutching your wrist. 

“You talk a lot. All words.”

“I would love it if you’d be sweet enough to break us out of here. Then I’ll show you.” And he gripped harder, drawing a hiss from your lips.

“You enjoy tormenting people, don’t you?”

“How could I not? It’s a lovely sound.”

“Disgusting.”

You wanted to punch him. Really, you did. Not like it would lead to anything. How he reached his position was beyond you. 

“You know how I’m this good at weeding out the scum of this world? Scum like you, to be precise,” Jouno said, his fake smile turned to you. 

“How?” you bit back, mouth twisting.

“You’re so easy to predict, that’s how. Even if you hide behind your self-righteousness– you still act one and the same. I’m merely being observant.”

A thought formed in your mind. Somehow the idea of catching Jouno off guard clutched you so strongly you had to see where it led. The pressure in your chest did not subside one bit, your emotions swirling still. 

Jouno’s smile widened as your answer did not come as quickly. He was good at reading you, alright, even your heartbeat giving away everything. But if you acted fast enough… 

You felt crazed, eyes wide with something as you reached for Jouno’s head, pulling roughly at his hair until you crashed your lips against his. You swallowed the momentary shock you could feel from him as his body seized up, freezing entirely against yours.

You pulled back just as quickly, enjoying the dumbfounded expression written all over Jouno’s face.

“Oh, sorry. Weren’t you expecting that?” you mocked, revelling further in the frown that pulled at Jouno’s lips.

“No.”

He pulled you quickly against him, no warning given. Your eyes widened as his hands grabbed at your face, lips already parted as Jouno kissed you this time. 

It was all a blur from that moment on. You were pushed by pure emotions, blinking away your hesitation as you grabbed onto him. Your lips parted, inviting him in. He was all sharp edges and snide remarks, but the way Jouno kissed was filled with passion. A hunger you didn’t expect from his as he cupped your face closer, stealing your breath by the second.

Jouno bit at your lower lip, not giving you enough time to protest as he dived back in, tongue sweeping over the bruised flesh. His hands held onto you, firm around your waist as he pushed his weight against you.

Your hand remained on the wall, but not for long if this went on. 

“Not a chance, you ass,” you whispered against his ear, before shoving him right back into the wall. You swallowed the hiss that left Jouno’s lips, and you felt the sparks of power travel through your other hand, denting the cracks behind him even further. 

You smiled viciously. This might be an even better plan than earlier. After all, it worked. Might as well push a little further…

Your pulled at your shirt. You worked on your trousers as you said without looking up, “Come on.”

Jouno’s fingers drummed onyour waist. He cocked his head. “Not a conventional idea, but I’m quite adaptable,” he said before fumbling with his own belt.

Jouno seemed composed… if it wasn’t for the slowness with which he was moving. Almost hesitation as you stood up, discarding your trousers in a few quick moves. You kept your panties for modesty’s sake. Not that it stopped you from straddling Jouno’s thighs as he finally pulled at his clothes down, pretty cock strucking out and already hard.

You could feel the wetness between your thighs, but it was nothing compared to the ever growing pulsing. It’s not often you got turned on this fast, but the sight of him before you definitely furthered the process.

Jouno was stroking himself slowly, fingers deft around his shaft as he breathed hard. The red of his hair matched prettily the growing flush of his cheeks. His lips were parted, but no words were spilling as you both took in the situation you were in. 

Jouno looked very kissable at this moment, ready and waiting for your touch. 

Gosh, you wanted to kiss him til he bruised. 

So you did just that, grabbing Jouno by the shirt as you sought his warmth again. He was not far back to respond, one hand grasping at your nape, twisting your face as he wanted while his tongue moved against yours. His other moved faster over his cock, drawing small moans of pleasure from his throat. 

And here you thought he was one of the quiet ones. 

Even better, knowing now the possibilities.

Your hand went down his chest, tugging playfully at his buttons, a sneaky finger trailing in between the open spaces to graze at bare skin. Every move you made fuelled more hunger from Jouno, the kisses building in passion. 

You weren’t kidding anyone, you were about to fuck this man’s brains out, no reservations whatsoever. Keeping half a thought to your original plan was becoming even more strenuous. Pulling your panties to the side didn’t help either, nor did Jouno’s groan as you guided his tip to your entrance, smearing your wetness atop of him.

You pulled your palm to the wall, breathing deep. Jouno’s hands were already at your hips, the anticipation clear in the way he gripped at your flesh. You kissed him again, wanting to savour every moment of Jouno feeling your walls stretching for him, his pretty cock sinking deeper into your pussy as you lowered your body down.  

“Oh, this is bad,” Jouno whispered against your lips, hips already thrusting in you deep. 

“How bad?” You smiled into the kiss.

“I’m not lasting long if you feel this good already, damn you.” 

And he moved, his pace faster and faster as you tried to keep your breathing. You didn’t doubt his words one bit, your arousal easy to match to his. The obscenity of it drove you closer to your peak, not caring in the slightest how pathetic it’d look if neither of you lasted long. With the way Jouno was taking charge, firm hands keeping you in place as he thrust into you fervently–you could only clutch around him, feeling your pussy flutter with every brush of his hairs against your clit. 

It was… it was a lot. 

“Faster,” you breathed against Jouno’s ear, keeping him flush against you with one hand as the other pushed into the hard surface behind him. You couldn’t see it, but you heard the sway of stone under your ability, the sound of it growing louder with every crack. 

“Demanding,” Jouno said, but it was no complaint; he did deliver, keeping the pace you wanted all the way till your thighs started spasming, your orgasm hitting you in waves of pleasure that had you doubling down, face buried in Jouno’s neck as you tried to stifle your sounds. 

There was no need–the bellowing echo of stones falling was enough to have you shoot up, Jouno pushing you back quickly as your eyes widened at the sight of the wall crumbling away behind you. 

You could only laugh, looking at the ceiling as you lay there on the floor, Jouno atop you now. And still inside. He didn’t spare you a moment, raising your leg up for a better angle before he was fucking into you again, seeking your lips fervently. You pulled him to you, hands buried in his hair. It didn’t take long before he lost it, his high nearing by the second when–

“Fuck. Fuck, I’m–” he pulled out suddenly, his spend spilling over your belly in hot streaks as he stroked himself through it. 

Jouno was panting, eyebrows drawn as he tried to gather himself. You did not let go of him through it all, keeping his in place against you. 

You needed to get up and get up now, but the shock of what you just did was still flowing through both of your veins. A moment is all you needed.

Just… yeah. You’ll be back to saving the world, you promised yourself. Just a moment.

[saintatreidess]

(MINOR) SPOILERS FOR BOTH NOSFERATU (2024) & THE NOVEL DRACULA AHEAD!

modernity in nosferatu (2024) & dracula

it’s been almost 24 hours since i saw robert eggers’ nosferatu and i’m still in shock by how well crafted this film is. all my expectations for a dracula adaptation have been met. it’s obviously not a faithful adaptation of the novel. but we’ve seen that even adaptations that claim faithfulness end up fumbling what the story is about (cough, cough, bram stoker’s dracula (1992)). so, with that in mind, i think it’s better for a movie to do its own thing as long as it includes the themes at the core of dracula. and this is what nosferatu (2024) does really well.

what i want to talk about here is the topic of modernity in the story. it’s a central theme in the novel. there are a lot of references to late 19th century technological & scientific innovation. the count dracula is wary of modernity. he doesn’t understand it so he almost fears it. there is an opposition between modernity and old/paganism. this opposition can also be interpreted as "west v east".

this is referenced a lot in robert eggers’ nosferatu. when thomas hutter arrives at count orlok’s castle he asks his host about the local population’s superstitions. this angers the count who calls said superstitions idiotic (or something like this, i don’t remember the exact quote). obviously in the movie the main reason orlok goes to the west (germany in the movie, england in the novel) is to get to ellen. but there’s another reason, which is that in the 19th century western world (at least in the cities) pagan beliefs are practically gone. it’s a "modern" world in which people are no longer superstitious. they don’t believe in the supernatural, in vampires.

in his home country, orlok is threatened by pagan beliefs. by moving west, he can claim victims and get away with it because he’s protected by the upholding of modern science and rational thinking, which replaced superstition long ago. in the movie, the germans think that the doings of orlok are the plague. the existence of a blood-thirsty demon is ridiculous to them. this idea is represented by the character of herr harding (aaron taylor-johnson), whose rational mind ends up costing him the loss of his family and his own life.

that being said, in the novel, what ends up causing count dracula’s downfall is his weariness of modernity that i mentioned above. he uses "archaic" means of transportation to escape the hunting team made of van helsing, dr seward, mina & jonathan harker etc. he travels by sail instead of steamboat, carriage instead of steam train, the list goes on. but what allows the count’s foes to defeat him is in fact the belief that modernity/science and superstition are complementary and not opposite. van helsing uses both a scientific and pagan approach to eventually kill the vampire. so, don’t get it twisted, the novel doesn’t try to say that "modernity = good & superstition = bad" or vice versa. rather i think it offers a more nuanced take, suggesting that one doesn’t necessarily have to cancel out the other.

gif credits: junkfoodcinemas

[gothicmatter]

harukawa's art is amazing, genuinely so fucking amazing with the way it genuinely made knight akutagawa feel mostly not himself pre-memory gain. he's there but he's an ideal, an icon. bram's last wish—for him to protect—breathed life back into him and whatever he had gained of himself so far naturally centered itself around fulfilling the role of the protector, personifying the knight on the battlefield. which is so genuinely him; that was the original purpose of personifying the beast in the slums, too. being a protector is such an inherent part of him that it can exist without him being entirely awake, just like his resolve to keep his promises. his will was not fully his own before he regained his memories and yet it served that core part of him so wholly in a way he himself hadn't been able to when he had conscious control... until he sacrificed himself for atsushi.

and then atsushi sacrificed himself for him. and now he's truly back. holy shit

[blimbo-buddy]

what would see inside phillipe be like?

Ohoho you're in for a treat. First off, some concepts:

Phillippe -> Pippy

To contrast with him appearing as a bug often seen as cute; I wanted to instead make him appear as a bug that isn't seen in the same good light

Stuck between a scorpion, fly, and roach (not pictured here)

Scorpion has deeper meaning but also I imagined a Fly if I wanted to keep closer to Phillippe's original appearance

Scorpion would have a little cork on the end of the stinger

I might do a poll to see which idea you guys like better

Now onto the actual story beats with him:

His whole thing with using the bug disguise to trick the party into being consumed by Spore Mother is still there

But instead, he actually feels horrible amounts of shame for it; this is the only purpose of his existence, to deceive and feed Spore Mother more victims

This is his inner turmoil while leading evil Sam/Bram and the party to Spore Mother and it's where it finally reaches a boiling point

I'd imagine in game dialogue would point out that Pippy is seeming very antsy which only gets worse when they're closer to their destination

At the last second, Pippy reveals the truth that he's a spore mimic and instantly drops what's going on

He cries that he doesn't want to hurt people

He doesn't want to feed Spore Mother anymore

He doesn't want to be a mushroom mimic

He wants to be Pippy

In the fight against Spore Mother, Pippy fights with evil Sam/Bram and the others. Unfortunately, Pippy sacrifices himself for the survival of the others.

Though thankfully, in a shocking moment, evil Sam/Bram feels a wave of remorse wash over him - though doesn't show it outwardly to the others in that moment- and takes his remains. He'll remember him, not as a mushroom, not as a monster, not even as something who was trying to lead them to their deaths; but as Pippy.

[subliminalbo]

I'll admit that I have a weakness for movies that are half good and Shyamalan has made a lot of half-good movies, but Trap is mostly all good!

I really liked Trap.

[tac-the-unseen]

What the Lost boys think about vampire related media

Fluff, x reader but just barely

•While making conversation with your four Vampire lovers you were suddenly plagued with a question.

“How do you guys feel about vampire related media?”

-That question was an immediate head turner. The cave goes dead quite before Dwayne speaks up, “Well…vampires are in hiding so…”

-This sparks a conversation about how media representation of vampires may not be accurate, but that's a good thing. “If a book or movie comes out and it is shockingly accurate to what being a vampire is really like, the creator isn't going to last long.” David explained

-That's because there's a set of rules vampires have to follow and one of those rules is to never publicly reveal your double life identity

-”If something like that comes out, that means a vampire has broken that rule OR somebody knows vampires very closely and is creating media they know shouldn't exist.”

-Turns out if a vampire breaks that rule it's basically open season to kill and destroy their creations.

•You turn the conversation and begin to ask how they, specifically, feel about certain vampire representation

•Bram Stoker's Dracula

-Dwayne is the first to buy in his opinion.

-Dwayne feels that while it is a cult classic and well written, The characters are exceedingly dumb.

-”Johnathan spends a ridiculous amount of time talking about other characters ‘Breasts’ and trying to figure out why his host climbs walls ‘like a lizard's.”

-David is the next one to speak up

-David thinks it's not really worth the read

-”Unless you're trying to brag to people there's no point in reading it.”

-”Also why was Mina talking to that old sailor so much?”

-Paul laughs as he remembers “how fucking crazy he wrote Dracula to be”

-”I'm pretty sure the real Dracula thinks it's a heinous crime against him”

-Paul hasn't read it but have heard enough about it to know even the more obscure references

-Marko comments on the graceful writing style and the beautiful descriptions

-”I've only read it because Dwayne thought I would like it"

-Marko also loves how oblivious Jonathan and most of the other characters are

-All of them think the movie adaptation is hilarious and love the shitty special effects

•Interview with a vampire

-Paul chimes in immediately

-”God it's so homo erotic it hurts…in a good way.”

-Paul thinks its a nice horror novel mixed with a weird cozy atmosphere

-Dwayne thinks it's another well written classic and He actually begins to rave about all the themes involved within Anne Rice’s work

-”It's a beautiful Gothic thriller with a deep, sadly comedic energy.”

-He even offers to read it too you sometime

-Marko chimes in quickly about “Claudia’s rebellious behavior and persona”

-”imagine watching your family choose somebody else over you. It's so deeply upsetting but to an understandable level.”

-”I would have hated to turn so young. I look like a teenager and other people can respect that to a certain point. But being five years old with the mind of an adult, No one would respect you.”

-Marko relates to Claudia on an internal level and loves unraveling her character. When you ask why he quickly responds "Some people call me a cherub... You think I enjoy that?"

-David says he doesn't have much to say other than it was a decent read (That's his version of a compliments)

•Twilight

-All of them agree that it's laughably horrendous

-Almost immediately at the same time they say “This is the skin of a killer Bella”

-This leads to banshee like laughter

David speaks up immediately

-”Why do you humans want us to sparkle so bad?”

-”I personally hate the idea of being a walking disco ball, but to each their own.”

-Marko chimes in quickly

-”Would you like it if we sparkled?” He asked while leans on you affectionately

-Marko thinks the only reason to read it is to have a nice laugh

-”Why did Edward have such a violent reaction of Bella standing by a fan? That makes no sense…like I have mates and I enjoy the smell of you guys but…I'm not nearly clawing off my face at your smell”

-”Yeah yeah, I get he's trying not to overreact but running out of class to get away is crazy.”

-Paul even adds that even thought it's very dumb even he can appreciate the message it's trying to said.

-”something something, coming over adversary, something something, love wins, something something..”

-”Also that Jacob imprinting on Bella's infant daughter is super fucking creepy.”

-when you asked Dwayne about his feels he scoffed and said It's insulting at best and borderline sexual harassment at worst.

-He refused to go into depth

•You thank them for humoring you and they tell you that it's no problem

-David kisses the side of your head in an uncharacteristically soft way “We don't ever mind answering your vampire related question.” He tells you

-Marko turns to you “But seriously do you want us to sparkle?”

-”I think I have some roll on body glitter somewhere..” Paul says while getting up to look for it

Thanks for reading <3

[sorcerersandskillusers]

This new chapter got me thinking about how "promises" in BSD seem to have some kind of power that trancends the minds/bodies of the people who make them. First there was Akutagawa, who kept his promise not to kill anyone even after being turned into a vampire and supposedly losing all him will. (he was also confirmed dead before he was turned, so there really shouldn't be any of his mind left in his body).

When it was just this chapter I thought it was meant to show that Akutagawa wasn't entirely under Fukuchi's control and that he was fighting the vampire infection. But with this new chapter I feel like their is something much bigger going on.

When Fyodor takes over Brams body he says that Brams vow to protect Aya still exists within his body so he cannot hurt her or let anyone else hurt her. Obviously Fyodor has no reason to protect Aya so there is clearly a actual, tangible force making him keep that promise, something that goes beyond Brams body and mind.

We don't have enough information to know what that force is and how it works, but it makes you think, what about the other major "promises" of BSD? How are they affected by this? Like say... Dazai's promise to Odasaku.

[cuntnikida]

Okay but Ueda Akinari is SO old. Like they're last visitor came one thousand five hundred years ago. Most bsd characters (excluding Atsushi who's 18, Sigma who's 3 even though physically he's a young adult and Fyodor and Bram who're both like a thousand years old, which btw alot of this math will probably apply to fyodor if he's the visitor from 1500 years ago which im 90% was canon confirmed but idk 100%) are in their early 20s unless they are visibly younger or older. Ueda obviously stopped aging when they were placed into the dimension of the divide being's core, if they didn't they'd be dead by now.

The minimum amount of time they've spent in the weapon's core is 1500 years. Since we don't know the upper limit of time they could've been in there, i'm gonna assume that they got a visitor in the same year they got trapped. Wether it was a few days or a few months is irrelevant.

So Ueda is like most likely physically 20-24 years old and technically 1520-1524 years old. Ranpo and Kouyou who are both 26 are considered pretty old (like how kouyou is portrayed as extremely mature and elegant and it's mentioned multiple times that Ranpo acts wayyy to immature for his age when he's only 26) by the other characters which means characters 25 and above are considered noticeably old which is why it's kind of unlikely for Ueda to be 1525 or more years old but if we're being lenient he could maybe be 1525 years old. If we're being lenient with the younger side of the spectrum maybe he could be 1518 years old.

So Ueda's probably 1520-1524 years old but possibly 1518-1525 years old.

And bungou stray dogs is obviously set in the modern world where the UN has been formed, cell phones and security cameras exist and most people in japan wear western clothes instead of traditional japanese ones on a day to day basis.

The issue is that the exact year isn't specified. I would say somewhere in the 2010s or in the 2020s but after the pandemic. But that's still not specific enough. So in order to assume what year in the modern world it takes place, we can either choose when the manga started being published (2012, although since it started december 2012 the whole year sorta already happened and it's closer to 2013 but 2012 nonetheless). Or the present year the manga's being published in which is 2025, however I'd find the last option rather unlikely for multiple reasons but will still include just in case it is set rn.

That means the earliest time Ueda Akinari has been born (aka when he was born) is 2012 - 1525 years which is 487. And the latest possible time they could've been born is 2025 - 1518 years where is 507. The most probable years they were born would be from 488 (2012 - 1524) to 492 (2012 - 1520).

Disclaimer- I'm not a history geek so if i get any of these events wrong please let me know and I'll change this post and thank you in advance for correcting my dumbass.

This bitch was born almost 500 years after jesus. This motherfucker isn't even a boomer they're the boomers' ancestors. The early middle ages/the dark ages/the early medieval period started in the late 5th century. More specifically around the start of the western roman empire's fall, which was like 476 AD. Which means Ueda Akinari was born during the fuckin dark ages. Although the dark ages was what was happening in europe and stuff, in japan the kofun period was happening.

Also him being alive during that time an event took place doesn't mean he was aware when major historical events occurred. Like He was stuck in another dimension during the fall of Constantinople

He was most likely in our dimension and on our earth from 488 to 512 AD (subtract a few years if you believe hes like 20/21/22/23 instead of 24) or 492 to 516 AD (also subtract a few years if you believe he's 20/21/22/23 instead of 24).

Dude's going on about how politicians sealed them away bro you existed before politicians as we know them existed. Ueda was most likely sealed away by a king or emperor or some shit.

Surprised atsushi can even talk to Ueda considering the japanese language probably changes alot since they've had no new visitors since they got trapped.

On the topic of language Ueda's place has a bunch of japanese writing and yet the oldest records of written japanese date back to the 8th century which is like two hundred years after they were sealed away. Which means that in the bsd universe there's been written japanese before that. Maybe it's been discovered maybe it hasn't idk man.

Also the tales of genji which is sometimes called the first novel were written (and while i wouldn't call it the first it was definitely one of the first) was written in the early 11th century. Ueda was trapped in this dimension when that happened. Which btw this only fuels my theory that they were really high in the class system when they were on earth bcz obviously reading and writing was something that usually only well off people did back then.

Maybe they were a warrior of sorts and that's why they made swords. Or maybe they were a famous swordsmith or royalty.

Like y'all know how surprised bram was when he was Aya play music on like her phone or something. Ueda would have that reaction to so many things. Like most foods tbh. Like alot of sauces and stuff had to be made from absolute scratch and fermented for months before use. Ueda has probably never tasted chocolate before. They'd walk into a convience store and have a heart attack lmao.

On the more angsty side their favourite flower might be extinct now. All their comforting childhood meals might have been so thoroughly altered that they only vaguely resemble what they used to be. Or maybe those childhood meals don't even exist anymore before bcz they were never written down or require now non existent ingredients. The fruits they once ate as a child now taste so sweet but make their heart feel so bitter. They see little children talk about stories like "cinderella" and realise all the folktales they knew as a child have died out and been long forgotten. Just like all their loved ones. If Ueda doesn't die and is freed, they'll never get to experience the joys of nostalgia ever again, only sorrow that everything they once knew is gone. Only an aching wish for what once was. Authors sometimes forget how long ago a millennium really is.

[selfaware-bungou-stray-dogs]

Hello!!!

I love your works, would be able to do a suegiku x gn!reader?

I adored your headcanons and would love to see jouno and Tecchou interact with the reader based on your writing

Tysm!! <3

Interactions between you, Saigiku Jouno and Tetchou Suehiro

Self-Aware! Saigiku Jouno x GN! Reader x Self-Aware! Tetchou Suehiro

Description: Some general headcannons about relationship between you three.

Warning: OOC, English is my second language. Some slight spoilers.

_______

💧🌸 At first, there would be some tension between you, Jouno and Tetchy. Not only because of the "Fictional characters turn out to be real,l and they heard everything I think about them, and they are aware about fandom" factor. This tension almost exclusively came from the Hunting Dogs duo.

💧🌸 Hunting Dogs, Sigma and Bram did appear later, than other characters, it's a fact. And, after they gained self-awareness and joined the rest of the Cast, the inner nervousness appeared. They are afraid, that you won't have a good opinion about them. They don't have too many scenes for you to form a 'stable' opinion. Moreover, most of them, except Sigma, "hurt" your established favorite characters. Yes, they could flood your Mayoi Account with cards and presents, but it will be just a part of a casual app game. Not something from the cannon. They will remain nervous until they get to the Real World.

💧🌸 So first interactions between you, Tetchou and Jouno were awkward. You weren't sure, how to interact with anyone from BSD Cast, too nervous of saying something wrong, and Hunting Dogs duo were dreadfully waiting for a moment you lash out at them for hunting ADA (and, in case of Jouno, arresting Dazai).

💧🌸 It will take some time. Small steps. At first, all of you will have small talks during dinners, discussing your days or last news. Then you will start hanging out (joining Hunting Dogs' morning training). At the end, when you three felt comfortable in confessing your fears to each other, you three will become closer.

🌸 It's on you and Jouno not to let Tetchou go to the kitchen unsupervised. Yes, he can eat whatever he wants, but, sometimes, he wants to share food he made with others. And not everyone can refuse. So, no sole trips to the kitchen for you, Tetchou.

💧 Jouno became an expert in Real World Music. He found liking in wearing headphones and listening to whatever he could find in the web. Quite often you and him can be found snuggling under the blanket, listening music/audiobooks/podcasts.

🌸 Tetchou decided to protect you from in-person scamming attempts. His glare can make scammers reconsider their actions. In some cases, they would even confess their crimes.

💧Jouno wants to try all existing hobbies. During the weekend, he and you (and, sometimes, someone else) will try to do different things. He tried knitting, sewing, painting, sculpture, gardening and aren't planning to stop.

🌸 Tetchou, after he learned about what would happen, if they gained self-awareness later (a.k.a. his fight with Kenji), felt guilty and decided to apologize to you and Kenji. There were no hard feelings between you three, so, you at the end you three decided to hang out together.

💧Jouno got into trouble with Bram and Kunikida after the chapter with him scaring Aya was released. You had to hide him in your room. At the end, everyone calmed down, but, sometimes, Bram and Kunikida gave Jouno heavy glares.

🌸💧 Tetchou tried to create a training regiment for you. However, he can't understand, that there is difference between normal people and super soldier. Jouno is making sure that Tetchou is keeping in mind the difference, while training with you.

🌸💧 Jouno and Tetchou start liking trashy comedies and over the top action movies. They like discussing them while watching. Their comments make it a worthwhile experience.

🌸💧 These two are terrible with understanding modern memes. So you often have to explain them slang.

🌸 When you are sad, Tetchou will be more of a "talk to me" guy. He will listen to your problems, offering advices or just singing you praises.

💧 When you are sad, Jouno will keep you company, not saying a word. He might start trash-talking about people who upset you.

💧🌸 They are polar opposites. But, they have something in common. They like you and want to be close to you.

[sigmalewife]

BSD characters with a idol s/o

Characters: Sigma, Bram, Dazai, Yosano, Chuuya, Kyoka, Fukuzawa.

Note: The Kyoka part can be read as platonic or romantic, the reader is explicitly of the same age as her in that part.

Cw: Mentions of diets (be careful!), minor injuries and obsessive fans.

Reminder that english is not my first language, sorry for the spelling mistakes.

gn!reader

Sigma.

• He loves your music :(

• Sigma can't go always to your presentations for his job in the casino, but he always make sure to let you know how proud he is of you!

• Sometimes he would be making paperwork until late at night, super stressed, but then you make a live for all your fans and everything becomes better. He leaves the live playing on his phone, as if it were background noise, and he stops feeling so alone in the office.

• (Although sometimes he gets distracted, thinking in how pretty your laugh sounds.)

• Sigma buys every merchandise of yours that exists.

• Even the not official.

• He often asks for fanart commissions from his favorite artists who are also fans of yours. Sigma believes in fandom solidarity!!!

Bram.

• Definitely was Aya who introduced him to your music.

• Just imagine that was one songs of yours that Aya put on play on that scene of the MP3. He's obsessed.

• Bram make sure of upload every song you make it, even the demos.

• After of a presentation, he would take the tea with you. Talking about the details. If you are in a group, he's more than happy to gossip about them.

• He learned the entire lighticks and fanchats system. Bram has it memorized as if it were very important ancestral knowledge.

• Bram it's so disappointed when he don't get your photocards. Definitely makes Aya buy other album.

Dazai.

• I hate him. He's such a lucky mf.

• The type of fan that always get the photocard he wants, and sometimes he thinks "hm, yeah, wouldn't be cool if y/n makes a collaboration with x singer" AND THEN YOU RELEASE THAT SONG DON'T EVEN KNOWING THAT HE WANTED THAT.

• Dazai is always there in your concerts, he loves seeing how your shine, with a crown screaming your name. Makes him feel so proud.

• The type of boyfriend that is always in the backstage, drying your tears when you feel that you didn't so good as you expected :(

• If he finds out that you're being harassed by some obsessive fan it's over. Dazai it's gonna make them pray for forgiveness.

Yosano.

• She adores you. I definitely can see her calling you cutie patootie, lmao.

• Yosano it's always showing you off to the rest of the ADA. What I can say? She just loves talk about you.

• You two go shopping together, and when a fan recognizes you Yosano put a hand in your waist, being alert to the other person's intentions to you.

• She can't use her ability with you, but everytime you get hurt dancing or something she personally takes care of you. Her hands are so soft when she bandage your feet.

• Same as Bram, Yosano LOVES gossip with you. She knows dirt of half industry just because you.

• Yosano takes pics of you being comfy/random in private and then edits them to when your fans see them, they get desperate trying to guess if it's you or not, lol.

Chuuya.

• He's like the best boyfriend for a idol. If you don't consider his job, of course.

• Chuuya can't go always to your presentations, but he's always on the phone, making sure your feeling good. He is very good at calming you down when you feel nervous.

• Takes you out in his motorcycle in a night ride when you need some inspiration for your songs.

• He have every album, but his favorite merchandise it's a plushie of you. He sleeps with it when you aren't in home for your tour.

• Chuuya it's also a bit unsure of his body, so when you are sad because you think you need lose weight, he's not gonna be hard to you (but with your agency/fans)

• He will use his free time to workout with you, it's like a personal trainer. But Chuuya loves most run with you at night, specially in the beach.

Kyoka.

• You are her comfort artist.

• Kyoka has been your fan since Atsushi took her out on that "date" and she saw you in the TV of an arcade.

• She loves how happy your look dancing and singing. The fact that you're almost her same age makes her feel closer to you.

• The ADA member starts to give her your merch in special events when they discovered that she was your fan.

• Now Kyoka have some albums and a plushie that she always sleep with.

• When you both become closer, Kyoka it's so happy to do normal teenage things with you. With the other, you both can feel more normal. No need to act.

Fukuzawa.

• Cat dad loves you !

• He MELT when he sees you with car ears.

• Fukuzawa loves the soft themed songs. Romantic ballads are his favorites.

• Soft man that hums your songs when his working.

• Fukuzawa always makes sure that your don't overwork. He pats your head and takes the afternoon tea with you.

• When you come back exhausted after a presentation, Fukuzawa gives you the best massage ever. He definitely knows these grandma secret medicines that will make you feel like a new person.

• Not really into buy merch, but Fukuzawa have a little keychain. He loves it, specially because it's a chibi version of you cat themed.