#which is supposed to be a more important trait... lol....

[freak-phone]

unintentional companion pieces

[keylimeguy]

the more hate lorelai gets the more i like her as a character<3 calling her abusive is insane. she is seventeen and has the worst coping mechanism (and father) imaginable. like i used to not like her but i’ve read into her since then and i do appreciate her a lot more now lol

[yuikomorii]

What's the actual relationship between Karlheinz and Ayato's like? Did Ayato always hated his dad? Did he forgive his dad?

(Hi admin~ Hope you're doing well 💌)

// Hey, I am! I hope you’re doing well too! 💕

As for your questions… Ayato might truly have the most complicated relationship with Karlheinz.

At first, Ayato disliked Karlheinz for personal reasons: being a neglectful father and husband. As a child longing for love and attention, Ayato’s pain ran deep, though it hadn’t yet turned to hate. But as he grew older and uncovered the full extent of Karl’s actions, his resentment became hatred. This is so important because Ayato, despite his arrogant exterior, is profoundly empathetic. He’s willing to forgive those who wrong him, as he's already done more than once, likely because he's learned to carry his own pain and move on. But when someone ruins other people without feeling any sort of remorse, that crosses a line he can’t overlook. (first pic)

Ayato is pretty much the only one who can call Karlheinz out in a way that actually hits him. In his MB good ending, when Ayato tells him “I pity you for being unable to realize the joy that comes from having someone love you to death,” Karlheinz is left speechless. That moment isn’t loud or dramatic, but it’s powerful, since for the first time, Karlheinz is really forced to face what he’s lost. And most likely, he envies Ayato for having something he’ll never get back. The wild part is that Karlheinz doesn’t try to brush it off or chuckle about it, he just... accepts it. He even tells Ayato not to make the same mistake. There’s a quiet kind of respect there, maybe even a touch of pride buried under all that regret. That moment feels different because Karlheinz finally looks at someone (Ayato) not just as another piece in his chess set. Out of all his sons, Ayato is the one Karlheinz sees as a glimpse of what he could’ve been, if he’d chosen love over his plans. (second and third pics)

In LE, after Ayato dies, it’s kind of surprising that he still wants to see Karlheinz, but at the same time, it makes a lot of sense. He’s still traumatized about what happened to him and needs someone to vent to. Ayato’s always been someone who needs interactions. Whether he's teasing someone, protecting them, or showing love in his own way, those relationships make him love life. But now that Ayato’s lonely, even the worst connection feels better than no connection at all. He’s always been afraid of being left truly alone, so with nothing left, he’s reaching for the only thing he remembers still being there: his father. (fourth pic)

In the CL bad ending, after Ayato fails to escape the miniature garden, we finally see something new on Karl’s face: regret. Usually, in bad endings, Karl either punishes those who fail or shows disappointment before rewinding time. But here, just by looking at his expression, you can tell there’s something different. It’s like a part of him actually feels sorry and perhaps he’s realizing it wasn’t entirely Ayato’s fault that things ended the way they did. (fifth pic)

Credit to: dialovers-translations and kyouxa

We know that, to Karlheinz, Ayato is the ideal Adam candidate, as shown here, but what really gets to me is that Ayato is the only Sakamaki who can rewind time even after death, just like Karlheinz himself. And that ability is basically Karl’s signature trait. It honestly feels like Rejet was pushing the “He’s the most like his father” narrative, which is pretty unsettling, especially when you think about everything Karl put him through in YB and throughout the franchise in general. Yet, I suppose it can’t be helped, given that Rejet is known for making everything messed up, lol.

[cy-cyborg]

How your disabled character's allies react to their disability can make or break the representation in your story: Writing Disability Quick Tips

[ID: An image with “Writing Disability quick tips: How your character's allies react to their disability matters” written in chalk the colour of the disability pride flag, from left to right, red, yellow, white, blue and green. Beside the text are 2 poorly drawn people icons in green, one is standing with their hand up to the face of the other, who is in a wheelchair. /End ID]

Something I brought up in my big post about Toph Beifong was how the other characters reacted to Toph pointing out that things were not accessible to her and setting boundaries regarding her disability, which were ignored. I had more to say about it than I thought I did, as it turns out (when isn't that the case lol) but I feel like this is an important aspect of disability representation that is all too often over looked.

You can write the best, most accurate portrayal of a specific disability ever put to screen or page, but it won't mean much if all the other characters, specifically those we're supposed to like and empathise with, treat your character terribly for being disabled and having needs relating to said disability, especially if the story justifies their behaviour.

You see this most often with autistic characters and especially autistic-coded characters. The character in question will be given a bunch of autistic traits, most often traits relating to not understanding certain social dynamics or sarcasm, and when they get it wrong, the other characters we are supposed to like jump down their throat, tease them or outright abandon them. Autism isn't the only disability that gets treated this way, but it is one of the more common ones that get this treatment. It doesn't matter if you do everything else right when creating an autistic character if the other "good guys" constantly call them annoying, get angry at them or laugh at them for the very traits that make them autistic, or for advocating for their needs.

Likewise, if you have a leg amputee character who is otherwise done well, but is constantly being criticised by their allies for needing to rest their legs or taking too long to get their prosthetics on, it undermines a lot of the other work you've done. Same goes for having a wheelchair user who is accused of being a bore or a stick in the mud because they point out the places their friends want to go to on a group holiday have no wheelchair access, or a deaf character who is accused of being entitled for wanting their family to learn to sign, or anything else.

This isn't to say you can never have moments like these in your stories, but its important to remember that a) people with the same disability as your character will be in your audience. If you spend a whole season of your TV show shaming your autistic character for real traits that real autistic people have, they're not exactly going to feel welcome and may not want to hang around. b) it's going to very, very heavily impact people's perceptions of your "heros" who do this, especially in they eyes of your audience members who share the character's disability or who have had similar experiences. This isn't like calling someone a mean name or being a bit of a dick when you're sleepy, it's going to take a lot to regain audience appeal for the offending character, and depending on exactly what they do and how frequently they do it, they may not even be able to come back from it at all. And finally, c) there should be a point to it outside of just shaming this character and saying the other guy is an asshole. Like I said before, you're character is criticising real people's real disabilities and the traits or problems that come with them, things that they often have no control over, it shouldn't be used as a cheap, quick way to establish a quirky enemies to lovers dynamic or show that one guy is kind of an ass before his redemption arc. If you really must have your characters do this, be mindful of when and how you use it.

[dreamingjuno]

THOUGHTS ON : Michael Kaiser !

MICHAEL KAISER’S NARCISSISM ( not a licensed professional, i just thought it would be fun to take a look at this perspective to better understand him! )

i was having a conversation about his character, more specifically his narcissism and had the idea to share my findings after deep diving into his character again!

NOTES ; cracks the old analyst bones in me. with the conclusion of the NEL arc (as it seems), i thought i’d explore my favorite complex god-chosen emperor! (edited a bit to fix some wording)

This part of my Kaiser analysis shows me analyzing his narcissistic traits!

SPOILERS FOR : Chapters 158-295 (basically the entire NEL now that I think about it)

(sorry if this isn’t too good or just repeating points lol)

KAISER’S NARCISSISM

I’ve heard multiple times before about Kaiser being possibly NPD coded and I considered it too, I mean — yeah it makes sense, he’s very narcissistic on the surface!

Talking through Kaiser’s character with my therapist however (yes, I did use a bit of my therapy session to discuss a fictional character’s diagnosis) and going through the important chapters where Kaiser’s mindset is shown lead me to realize he exhibits many traits of narcissism but also a deep sense of perfectionism and depression/insecurity.

Realizing that made me try to look at Kaiser in a newer light, unbiased, and this is the results of me diving deep into Kaiser’s narcissistic qualities and his character in general

So, let’s go through symptoms listed for narcissism and discuss how they do or do not relate to Kaiser to understand him better as a whole!

(Taking each point from Harvard Health)

1. A grandiose sense of self-importance

He does, I won’t deny it because it’s obvious. Kaiser acts as though he is superior to others — yet, when placed in a situation where someone obviously more talented / superior than him (Noel Noa) talks down to him, he steps back. As seen here ⟶

To me, I think Kaiser subconsciously understands where he is beneath Noa for instance while still regarding himself (at least while this panel was going on) at the top of the food chain. It’s a bit of hypocrisy on Kaiser’s end which shows itself in multiple points of Kaiser’s philosophy on living, but that may be intentional to show how flawed his way of viewing is. He sees himself at the top, while still bending at the knee to those who are more superior than he is without Kaiser even really realizing it. Superior over the inferior, but what if the superior was still only halfway there?

This hypocrisy is even acknowledged and pointed out by Chris Prince before KAISER comes to this conclusion. He literally said it all. “You act superior toward those below you… and like a deferential coward to those above you.”

His supposed superiority as the Emperor is a sham — A way to compensate with his lack of self. The throne of corpses he climbed to become ‘human’ in his mind.

I think this falls into a superiority complex of his, again, not denying that having a sense of self-importance is apart of Kaiser. He’s shown time and time again to hold himself in a higher regard than the others around him — it does come from a state of insecurity. His ego is fragile (as seen in his glass collar in his cover art), and Kaiser understands he can’t beat Noa. That’s WHY he wanted to find another club to become their ace instead because Noa was just an impossibility of surpassing despite his saying of “I achieve the impossible.”

Kaiser reached the top, but didn’t? He achieves the impossible, but overtaking Noa is impossible? Hypocrisy… One he only sees later (in his own way…) Superiority is like his safety blanket, it keeps him safe in his mind. Being the emperor keeps him safe from harm and being taken advantage of.

2. A preoccupation with fantasies of success, power, beauty, or perfect love

They word it weird but from what I understand it means: “having a daydream / fantasy about having something greater, often at the expense of others.”

In some ways, Kaiser falls into this symptom too, but in other ways, he doesn’t. I don’t think his ambition is really ambition for to have something better, not entirely. It’s the drive to be at the top of the food chain (which is becoming my favorite analogy for describing Kaiser’s mindset!) so no one can step on him anymore. Kaiser fights for the identity and structure he’s worked for in my mind, the life and position he attained through soccer. Not necessarily the riches or comfort of his life. Even then, he never seemed like to me as someone who cared about wealth or success — caring mainly for the sense of humanity that came alongside it.

Yes, he wants to be better — but comes from a place of survival and staying at the top of the food chain than wanting things like success or power or beauty or love.

3. A belief that they are "special" and can only be understood by other special people

We’ve seen no proof at all that Kaiser sees himself as special (which IS different from holding yourself in a high regard/being superior) — actually, he views himself negatively on the inside truly. Calling himself a ‘piece of shit’ and regards everyone around him as ‘humans’ while seeing himself as less than due to the conditions and how he was treated at home. Honestly, that probably never went away even with his cocky persona. He’s still mentally weak despite how much he tries to bury it…

Neither does he show only feeling understood by others either, even the people higher class than him — it’s either frustration/anger or begrudging respect. (seen in his defeat by Isagi, where he openly admitted playing with Isagi was fun — instead of soccer just being a battleground to climb to the top)

I don’t think he’s even shown as wanting to be understood. I didn’t read the entire arc (I was already fighting procrastination to write this), but being understood? I’m pretty sure that was never even an aspiration of his, not even in his mind.

Kaiser isolated himself in BM, not accepting any of the good will given to him by his teammates. Not because he didn’t think he wouldn’t be understood, it’s that he was more comfortable being the enemy. Being alone was all he knew up to that point. Especially shown in the flashback in the BM Clubhouse when Kaiser was 15-16, he would rather be hated and feared than be loved and respected — Kaiser doesn’t know any alternative!

4. A need for excessive admiration

Again, it’s one of the symptoms that applies kinda but at the same time not.

Kaiser wants love, but not the type of admiration provided by Ness and the audience and such. While, yes, being acknowledged for his accomplishments probably feeds his ego — it’s just oil to a dying flame in my eyes. It isn’t what makes Kaiser feel seen. Why have admiration when you can be seen as a scar in malice?

“I will prove my existence through my malice.”

I don’t think admiration is the greatest need in his mind. Everyone likes to have their skill acknowledged, but for Kaiser — making others remember him by inflicting pain on them is what gives him the most satisfaction. Not happiness per se. Just… validated, I believe. Like the type of euphoria you get when you smoke a cigarette (not that I smoke but I've heard) It feels good for a little bit though even if it isn’t permanent. That’s what I believe Kaiser feels inflicting his anger and malice onto others.

A point where this is shown most of all is Kaiser’s general lack of reaction to Ness’s praise which usually ends in reprimand. He never demanded admiration or praise from Ness, Kaiser even seemed annoyed by it. He just wanted a loyal dog, not a groupie, if that makes sense. Making Ness small and dependent on him made him feel superior, and more secure — which is a trait narcissists have. But talking about Kaiser and Ness is its own can of worms!

In short, admiration doesn’t validate his existence. Malice does!

5. A sense of entitlement, which may include an unreasonable expectation to be treated favorably or for others to comply with their demands and expectations

Yeah. He does, in a way. You can see it in how the starting lineup was structured in the BM vs Barcha match. It all revolved around him. It doesn’t come from a sense of feeling he deserves it though. It’s because Kaiser needs that power over others: Kaiser wants to be the star actor in this play because that’s where he holds the most control, and that’s where he feels more secure. As I said before.

6. Behavior that is exploitative and takes advantage of others to achieve their own ends

He does! There are many examples of him taking advantage of others, but to not beat over the same points; I'll just go with the most obvious and clear example of Alexis Ness! Like, there's no denying that Kaiser manipulated Ness. Kaiser uses others to only further his own control and make himself feel less vulnerable. Superior over the inferior again. The ones at the top and in control won’t be hurt. That’s his mindset. So taking advantage of others is just another outlet for that control.

Kaiser uses others to further his own standing, to keep that security blanket of control over himself and the field.

7. A lack of empathy or an unwillingness to identify with the needs of others

Kaiser has shown before to understand the needs and emotions of others as well as being emotionally intelligent about where HE goes wrong (to a point). Showing his empathy, because empathy isn’t just about feeling bad for others — it’s understanding those emotions. The best moments where he reflects: THE LEAD UP TO HIS MAGNUS SHOT and AFTER ISAGI DEFEATS HIM POST-PXG MATCH.

In the lead-up to his Magnus Shot, he basically reflects on what we've talked about so far! Kaiser reflects on his own hypocritical ideas and acknowledges he isn’t at the top of the food chain yet as Isagi and Noa have already surpassed him and how he has to go back to his own self-loathing to continue climbing ahead.

Now, going BACK to another point I previously mentioned is Kaiser’s epiphany at the end of the PXG Match! (There’s not many examples off the top of my head)

Through that entire scene, Kaiser acknowledges that it wasn’t the fault of those around him like Isagi or Ness or any of his other teammates — but himself. It was his own will that led to the outcome of the match. Kaiser acknowledges his faults, without directly saying “It’s my fault.” He KNOWS his emotions, he ACKNOWLEDGES the emotions of the people around him as well.

Kaiser, I believe, understands what he’s doing is WRONG but doesn’t act on it. Which is why I think he’s emotionally intelligent without doing anything to change what he does. At least not in any healthy way. Kaiser justifies what he does in his head, even if he understands what he’s doing realistically. Falling into his own hypocrisy again. That’s how I took it as anyway.

He reads psychology and philosophy books. I HOPE Kaiser knows what’s wrong with him

8. A tendency to be envious of others or a belief that others are envious of them

His envy isn’t really envy. It’s like his ambition. I can’t recall a point where Kaiser seemed jealous over something or envious of their position or things they had (feel free to correct me if I’m wrong of course). His rivalry with Isagi isn’t one of jealousy for example — it was originally just to step on the more inferior players that later turned into ‘Oh shit, he may surpass me. He’ll make ME inferior… weak’ fear.

9. Arrogance, haughty behaviors, and attitudes

Talked about his arrogance in the superiority section so I won’t repeat myself!

This is PART 1 of 2 because this was already getting WAY TOO LONG.

After finishing writing this, I definitely repeated the same point multiple times and missed probably good points of evidence LMAO but I’m powering through this insanity with a dream and an unhealthy fixation with Kaiser. I hope I made sense… I really just rambled on my ideas and tried to piece them together as best as I could lol

Anyways… THANKS FOR READING!

[ratatattouille]

this passage got me over-analyzing on main again, lol. this part right here, in the GOF, is pure ginny and it really kinda cements why i don't get HBP ginny (the book). because this ginny and the ginny we get from POA all the way to OOTP are the same ginny: she's concerned for the safety of others, fiercely loyal, occasionally bashful but also bold, kind of an outcast and otherwise ordinary.

first of all, i never had a problem with quidditch-lover ginny. if anything, i loved the idea of her becoming bold as a response to being (basically) raised by fred, george, ron and bill and pursuing quidditch in spite of them. before HBP, we see her stand up to ron and even harry. we know she's used to standing up for others especially when it comes to her brothers.

but then in HBP, all of a sudden, we get this super popular, super beautiful, snarky, petty girl that just seems out of left-field. the book relies more on telling us that ginny is all these things instead of showing us. we hear slytherins talk about how good looking she is, but harry himself at the height of his attraction to her never really describes her looks as much of anything but "blazing." there's so many other words he uses to describe characters looks, whether he finds them attractive or not (he describes cho's freckles and ponytail), but there's so little for ginny.

but that's minor.

the big problem here is that we're supposed to believe ginny is suddenly popular because . . . she is. she makes mean spirited jokes and hexes people that merely irritate her. not being a pushover is one thing. being that petty is another.

this behaviour isn't a problem for me because i think ginny should be perfect and ordinary and a good girl, but because there's very little character development to warrant any of these changes, and what we know of her in other books is almost completely abandoned for hinny endgame.

and the best example i can use is tom riddle's diary.

in CoS (one of my top three, personally), we have a ginny who is responsible for the near-deaths of at least three students and then herself. so three important things to keep in mind is:

She felt like an outcast and lonely her first year (she didn’t fit in despite her siblings’ notoriety) and so turned to riddle's diary for solace.

She probably got a bad rep for nearly killing all those students, which couldn't have been easy for her (remember how strongly the kids reacted when they merely suspected harry).

In OOTP, she confessed to feeling traumatized about her experience in the chamber.

In book 5, we know that she felt some kinship with luna, even after initially calling her "loony" and regretting it, and it's likely because she knows what it's like to feel like an outcast. she didn't have a very good first year and we barely read about what she had to endure as a result of her actions in her second and third year (bc pov harry literally doesn't care until book 6), and she's also the only girl in her family who must stick up for herself and her own interests.

so it's disarming to see ginny suddenly popular in book 6, very mean-spirited and thoroughly unfunny, and so disloyal to her brother that she goes out of her way to publicly humiliate him. ginny was not above teasing her brother in other books, but she was never mean to the people she loved or even in general. ginny may have fought many times with ron and the twins, but her defining trait has always been loyalty. not just to harry, but her friends and family.

furthermore, HPB ginny is VERY liberal with her hexes and jinxes. she even goes as far as to defend harry's use of sectumsempra against hermione! now one can say this is because of her loyalty to harry, and you'd almost have me there! but it's still quite a ways away from GOF ginny who stood up to ron and harry making fun of girls and literally tag-teamed with hermione in calling them out. ginny was loyal, but she usually stood up to her friends and family when they did something wrong because she had a soft-spot for the downtrodden.

and i speak of the curses because if ginny didn't have to be shoe-horned into a relationship with harry in HPB so that harry got Barrows citizenship, her character would have been grounded in the horrors she faced in CoS--meaning that she felt regret for all the trauma she caused others and experienced some anxiety about her ability to control herself. or we could all just assume that she didn't ever address what she did to others (like saying sorry), making her a profoundly sociopathic character (and very different from who she was in earlier books). either she was badly written (that is written exclusively to titillate Harry) in HBP or just a terrible person all along.

i prefer to go with the first one.

i think ginny was terrified of what she did under the possession of tom riddle, and it's mentioned in OOTP that it traumatized her. why wouldn't she be afraid of becoming vindictive and hurting people? why would she all of a sudden become very liberal and nonchalant about performing powerful and painful hexes on people who simply annoyed her? why would she be barrelling into players during quidditch matches when she, at heart, values fairness and others well-being? why wouldn't she be scared, like harry is when he starts sharing voldemort's visions, of herself and hurting the ones she loves? wouldn't that have been a better basis for their eventual romance?

it annoys me that JK Rowling says that the reason ginny is harry's soulmate is because of their strength and passion rather than their shared care for the marginalized and their sensitivity toward the people they love. because the ginny that shared that with harry is gone in the book where she has to get with him.

and while i know the books aren't written to be romantic or focus on any romances, the fact remains that in stories, if anything is to be believed, it must be well-established, and hinny's romance isn't.

the failure of the relationship isn't that it isn't romantic, but that it isn't believable in the first place based on what we know of the characters. because when ginny was her true self, harry didn't notice her. and when ginny was with harry, she wasn't herself.

maybe what's romantic about it is it's practically a greek tragedy in that sense.

[perotovar]

A Writing Challenge from August 1st - September 21st

"Erin, what is Frith?"

Frith, is an Old Norse term, typically used among friends and kinsmen, that would often be used in a diplomatic way to bring peace.

Or, more plainly, “a mutual agreement to avoid causing each other physical, emotional, or mental harm, and to avoid negatively affecting each other’s honor, worth, and luck.”

This is meant to be a long-lasting agreement among those that take part.

Now, I’ve spent a decent amount of time to know, in this fandom, that that could very well be wishful thinking, but I’m choosing to stay positive here. It’s no secret that there have been things happening lately that are less than stellar, to put it mildly.

But I’m not here to talk about that.

I’m here to have fun and be creative so that’s what we’re going to do!

I’ve had this idea brewing for several months, and it’s a subject matter that’s very near and dear to my heart. In my personal life, I’m a practicing Norse Pagan. For those that are unfamiliar, I like to describe it as worshiping the Old Ones. I follow the teachings of the Norse Gods.

Why am I telling you this? Well, since this is something that’s so close to me, and we’re all here as fans of one Pedro Pascal and his work, I figured why not combine the two? Initially, the goal was to write all these fics myself, but when I discovered just how exhausting and time-consuming that would be, I decided to include all of you!

I failed to do a follower milestone to thank you all and celebrate, so take this as my thank you for sticking around here and showing support to my fics and gifs.

Alright, so how is this going to work?

huge shoutout to @scenaaario and @kedsandtubesocks for all your help on this you lovely humans ♥

Another important aspect of Heathenry (Norse Paganism) is reciprocity. “Gifts given for gifts received.” So, you all wouldn’t just be giving me a bunch of fics to read. I’ve made something for those of you who will participate as well. This is an equal exchange.

I’ve paired up several of the PPCU with Norse Gods and made moodboards for each of them. I have reasons for matching them up the way I have, and I’ll go into more detail as to why later.

So, yes, this is a writing challenge at its core, but it’s also a way for me to show a little peace of myself with you all and for us all to be creative and have fun! Maybe you’ll step out of your comfort zone a little and that’s okay!

There is an expectation that something will be written/received, so if you don’t think you’ll be able to participate, that’s totally okay. There’s no pressure at all, and I appreciate any support or boosting to get to those that would like to!

Okay, enough of all that, which Gods have I chosen to match up with the Boys?

I’m glad you asked! Matching up traits and personalities was really fun, and really challenging. Nothing is a 1:1 match, but that’s okay. Nothing is supposed to be, and that’s where some of the challenge may come in.

For those that are participating in the challenge, you’ll send me an ask declaring which God/Pedro Boy you’d like to write. In return, and my part of the reciprocity, you’ll receive a moodboard to use for your fic, and a little blurb telling you a little more about the God and why I’ve chosen that character to pair them with. I’m hoping some of them will be a little obvious, but I’m aware not everyone is as familiar with the Gods as I am.

There are only 14 slots and therefore only 14 moodboards made, so once someone has been claimed, that’s it. As much as I’d love to have even more people participate, I don’t think I can make that many things lol.

If you’d still like to contribute somehow, I’m open to any questions you may have about the Gods (and maybe how the boys relate), because I’m a big ol’ nerd and love talking about this shit.

So, who’s who?

Maxwell Lord – Odin [Óðinn] (The All-Father and God of wisdom, magic, war, death, but also cunning and trickery.) claimed by @missredherring

Pero Tovar – Thor [Þórr] (God of thunder, lightning, sacred groves and trees, strength, and the protection of humankind.) claimed by @morallyinept

Max Phillips – Loki (The Trickster God of mischief and chaos.) claimed by @qveerthe0ry

Oberyn Martell – Freyja (Goddess of love, sensuality, sex, passion, war, and magic.) claimed by @guiltyasdave

Javier Peña – Freyr (God of fertility, harvests, and peace.) claimed by @almostfoxglove

Ezra – Týr (God of victory, law, and justice.) claimed by @marisferasiop

Marcus Moreno – Frigg (Goddess of domestic life, marriage, and maternal energy.) claimed by @joelalorian

Joel Miller – Hel (Goddess of death and guide to the underworld.) claimed by @beefrobeefcal

Dieter Bravo – Bragi (God of poetry, oral traditions, and the Skaldic Poet of the Aesir.) claimed by @schnarfer

Javi Gutierrez – Baldr (God of light and purity.) claimed by @morallyinept

Dave York – Vidar [Víðarr] (The Silent God of vengeance.) claimed by @kedsandtubesocks

Din Djarin – Heimdall [Heimdallr] (Gatekeeper of Asgard, the gods’ stronghold within Valhalla. God of guardianship, vigilance, and protection.) claimed by @djarinmuse

Frankie Morales – Skadi [Skaði] (Goddess of winter, skiing, bow-hunting, and mountains.) claimed by @agentmarcuspike

Jack “Agent Whiskey” Daniels – Ægir (Brewmaster of the sea.) claimed by @lotusbxtch

extras:

Marcus Pike – Idun [Iðunn] (Goddess of eternal youth and sacred apples.) claimed by @gasolinerainbowpuddles

Silva – Ymir (First being in existence and the reason for the creation of Earth.) claimed by @yopossum

Santiago Garcia – Fenrir (Most famous of all the wolves in Norse Mythology and the bringer of Ragnarok.) claimed by @for-a-longlongtime

There are no rules for your fic itself. You can write whatever and however much you want. All I ask is that some aspects of the Gods stay intact, otherwise this would just be any old writing challenge.

I wanna see you guys get creative with what the Gods offer. How are they speaking to you? What energy/vibes are you getting off of them? Run with it.

Now, I’m posting this the day before Lammas, the Pagan holiday that often takes place in the Summer, August 1st. I think it would round out the summer nicely if everything gets published around Mabon, September 21st, the holiday that celebrates the Fall equinox.

That gives everyone almost two months to write their stories. I’m hoping that’s a decent time? If it’s not, I’m not picky and typically run on Pagan Standard Time, so if it’ll take you a little longer, just let me know and it’ll probably be fine.

Thank you for sticking with my ramble, and I wish you all gọ̄der hēle (good luck)!

And remember, have fun!

[mayasaura]

sorry if this has been answered before or if there's a post about this, but I've been seeing a lot of posts labeling harrow as schizophrenic and/or having trouble recognizing reality, including the one you just made about crux as harrow's caretaker and reality-indicator.

I realize that these interpretations come from htn, but I'm curious as why people feel that it's always been a trait of harrow's instead of a side effect of the lobotomy?

I was under the impression that she created the reality problems as an excuse to cover the blocks in her memory, especially since we know that wake/the sleeper didn't possess her until after gtn and most of her confusion happens in the river bubble.

even the "hallucinations" of the body don't really impact her perception of reality, and it's actually alecto's soul not a real hallucination. the only questionable moment I can remember is when she sees cytheria under the bed and ianthe says there's nothing there, but we know ianthe is a duplicitous legend so I read it as ianthe lying to harrow lol

long story short, I was wondering if there was scenes in gtn, ntn, or post-realization htn that indicate harrow has had these reality problems pre-lobotomy? or if you know of a post analyzing it further? sorry to throw this at you, I just haven't seen any analysis of it but I saw your post so I was hoping you would have more info :) I really adore all of your tlt analysis posts!

Hi! Yeah, if you go into my '#harrow's schizophrenia' tag, I've made several posts about it, and other people have added on to a few of them with further elaboration.

But I don't think I've ever laid it out fully like a thesis. And I have several stressful things I should be doing right now, so I can't think of a better time to get into it.

When Harrow's brain is editing Gideon out, there's an effect a little like a record skip. Her memory snags on something, very briefly, and then quickly moves on. Or she'll make an assumption or say something that doesn't actually make sense without Gideon in the picture, but she won't notice. The most prominent example is the details in chapter 3 surrounding her opening of the Tomb:

Just ellipsis "found out" ellipsis to skim over the very large part Gideon had to play in those events. If she were to interrogate the memory, it would be strange that she doesn't remember how her parents found out, but doing so would make her brain bleed. She would black out, and most likely forget what she was trying to remember.

And an example from the same chapter of a statement that doesn't make sense, unless you know about Gideon:

Two things are important about these examples, the first being that they don't upset Harrow. She doesn't think they're strange, because she barely thinks about them, which was sort of the point of the lobotomy in the first place. The second is that they can be immediately explained by plugging Gideon into the Gideon-shaped hole in Harrow's memory. If you know about Gideon, and what Harrow's done, there's no mystery remaining.

In contrast, there are other details in chapter 3 about Harrow's childhood that Harrow did, and does, find strange and upsetting.

Gideon didn't attend services, and she most definitely didn't participate in chants. Putting Gideon back in the picture does nothing to explain the "weird, thuddering beat" Harrow finds disruptive. But it does sound an awful lot like an auditory hallucination, as does hearing doors open and close where no doors were opening and closing.

Maybe we could try to explain the doors by supposing she was hearing Gideon coming and going without remembering the source, but that doesn't really track with how we know her mind processes the missing pieces. If Harrow were papering Gideon over in her memory, it wouldn't be important who was or wasn't opening doors and where. The focus of her memory would quickly shift, just like it did when trying to remember how her parents found out about the Tomb, in order to avoid looking at what she's hidden from herself.

Then there's the next paragraph:

Again, plugging Gideon into this memory does nothing to explain it. Even if Gideon had been in the habit of sneaking up behind Harrow and attempting to choke her out—which, yikes—Harrow has already seamlessly blocked out the memory of one attempted strangulation. Then there are the phantom ropes she sees, her parents' method of suicide haunting her.

The forgetting where she was, losing time, and false memories do seem at first glance like they could be explained by the lobotomy, seeing as that is sort of the whole purpose and effect. But I'm pretty sure even these are real memories. Again, because of the focus of her attention. She's remembering having forgotten, while the lobotomy make her forget to remember.

Then there's Harrow's overall behavior. Her reactions to her hallucinations, especially in the River bubble, which imply that not all of this is new to her. She isn't shocked, or caught off-guard. She has coping mechanisms. She's figured out what evidence she can probably rely on to rule out hallucinations, and what's more likely to be suspect. A lobotomy, even a necromantic lobotomy, doesn't come with built-in tools for coping with its effects. Her memory of her past without Gideon in it is fractured and incomplete, not an entirely new life story with new life lessons.

Finally, from Nona the Ninth, some evidence that Harrow's problems with reality definitely predate the lobotomy:

Crux remembers them.

[neyafromfrance95]

Can I just say I kind of feel sorry for the writers because you can tell they conceived the show as revolving around Haladriel and they really don’t want to deal with the Celeborn issue so they play lip service while writing something completely different lol.

To be fair though Tolkien himself wasn’t interested in him or him and Galadriel as a pairing especially when you compare how he writes his epic romances. It really feels like he was put there so we can get Arwen pretty much. And then she leaves without him to Valinor while he’s left mourning her which 🤣.

But yeah as far as the show goes if they didn’t want fans to see Haladriel as romantic they would have shown her grieving Celeborn…instead of falling in love with her arch enemy. This is just my opinion though but you can’t say how much she loves and grieves Celeborn while showing the complete opposite on the show. There was a way to center the relationship between her and Sauron without it being framed as romantic/soulmates but they didn’t which tells you everything you need to know.

exactly!

even before trop, it has been believed that the only reason tolkien wrote celeb0rn was to somehow connect galadriel to arwen and elrond.

the initial plan was for gal to marry elrond, but tolkien wanted galadriel to be the leader in her own right (it is her main defining trait) and keep doing her own thing. he did not want her to be defined by her husband/child. if she was married to elrond, she would be known as elrond's wife/arwen's mother first. so he gave her a npc family in the background instead.

but even then, i'd say her relationship with elrond is still more important in the books. and in the movies, she even seems closer to gandalf, lmao. so i'd say it would be better to focus on her relationship with elrond and establish her friendship with gandalf rather than introduce a new love interest (bc yeah, even if it's not explicitly romantic, haladriel is romantically framed).

btw, don't even get me started about how everyone seems to forget about finrod??? the one galadriel misses, the real "third" between her and sauron, her "guiding light" IS FINROD! nenya symbolizes galadriel's desire for power = sauron and galadriel's light/wisdom she got from finrod! nenya was made by sauron's design and using finrod's dagger! it's like sauron and finrod's battle continues within galadriel.

i don't dislike celeb0rn, but i think it's crazy that he was created so that galadriel can't be reduced to the domestic role and yet certain segments of the fandom do that anyways - reduce her to being her npc family's wife/mother in the show that intends to explore other aspects of her story and identity!

and idk man, but i feel like tolkien must have had some ideas for sauron and galadriel. "he gropes ever to see me and my thought" feels very significant. and they mirror each other in several ways as well.

trop does a fantastic job at giving this dynamic context. galadriel's greatest desire is to possess power, sauron's greatest desire is to posses the light. it makes sense for them to have a push-pull dynamic that's both intimate and cosmic in its' essence. the perfect way to expand on all the little details connecting sauron and galadriel in the lore. and it's just a fascinating story on its' own!

it would be such a waste to discard this dynamic for the sake of introducing the character that was never supposed to be that important. especially considering that the writers seem to have the show conceived with haladriel as its' core in their minds.

[tiktowafel]

personal lore dump for Shihai Kuroiro!! (where i'm probably a little mean to him but it's out of love guys i swear)

verrry late for his birthday but it's here!! :] love this kid. so many thoughts about him to share

i'll just start with the part that i find the most important - the core of his character, to me, is that he is not what he says he is and not what he desperately tries to convince himself and everyone else that he is.

i'm mostly basing this off of how ultra analysis gives him one of the two lowest wits scores in his class (as shown above) despite the fact that he calls himself "the scheming hero" and spends half his joint training match dramatically talking about trickery and psychological traps - while i like to ignore canon sometimes, this little piece of information is something i could never disregard. it's so endearing to me, plus him apparently trying really hard to seem way cooler than he actually is fits with the chuunibyou archetype he's supposed to represent.

severe headcanon territory & a generally slightly lengthy textpost under the read more lol

now, why do i hc he's that way in the first place? well, basically: his whole life he's admired underground heroes very strongly and ended up developing this very idealized mental picture of the perfect underground hero - a mysterious lonely mastermind who hides in the shadows and avoids the spotlight, quietly pulling all the strings and relying on plans and schemes instead of a powerful quirk and flashy moves. but despite all the dirty tricks they're capable of, their heart is in the right place - in fact in a way their motivations are far more noble than those of all the popular celebrity heroes, because they don't care about fame or recognition, they act out of a genuine want to do good. this is what Kuroiro aspires to be and what he bases his entire persona on, pretty much.

and that's because this is also the only kind of hero he could ever identify with - he was always an odd, withdrawn kid who had trouble making friends. he couldn't see himself in all those shiny charismatic always-in-the-spotlight heroes that everyone else seemed to love. so when he learned about underground heroes, he fell in love instantly and decided this is who he wanted to be, over time forming this perfect underground hero image to set as his goal.

except, again, a lot of traits possessed by this ideal of a hero aren't really in line with what Kuroiro himself actually is. he's nowhere this badass. he's nowhere this smart. he kinda sucks at this whole scheming thing actually! he's sneaky, sure, that's by nature of his quirk - but his schemes are way less elaborate than he likes to make them seem, most of the time they're just ways for himself to catch people off guard. he doesn't have the multi-step coordination-based planning capablity of Kendo or Tokage, the adaptability of Honenuki or the sheer sophistication of Monoma (note that almost all of 1-b's plan during joint training match 2 was invented by Kendo and Kuroiro's only strategic contribution was tricking 1-a into thinking he was gonna target Tokoyami so he could ambush Aoyama instead - which is something yeah but still nothing particularly complicated). and he hates that about himself, because intelligence is something that he values and admires so so much - so he exaggerates his strategic prowess a lot, with his hero title and dramatic speeches and all, and does everything in his power not to be perceived as stupid (often failing miserably). it's out of insecurity.

he's also not that much of a lone wolf, either. he does have a strong tendency to isolate himself from others, which is partially because he's convinced himself that he's destined to walk a lonely path in life & content with it (what's a better way of coping with your childhood loneliness than romanticizing it) and partially because the fact that he's constantly putting up a facade does by itself kinda prevent him from forming proper relationships, BUT he's not really happy this way. he's introverted but ultimately not meant to be alone. he does need friends! and he does wish for a romantic relationship, too! but, of course, he sucks at managing those feelings, as we can judge by his interactions with Kinoko and his general incapability of normally talking to girls mentioned in ultra analysis.

i actually really like that he has a crush on Kinoko specifically because it plays really well into everything that i said earlier in this post! remember that something he admires a lot about underground heroes is that they don't care about fame and recognition, and therefore in his view have the most genuine motivations? i like to believe that odd as it is, he actually has a very strong moral compass and greatly values selflessness. so, imagine how he feels when he learns that Kinoko, whom he already has a crush on because she's cute and she's nice to him and she has a really cool quirk (something something mushrooms like darkness so they must be meant to be), wants to be an idol hero. bro's devastated. those people are the epitome of modern hero society's shallowness and superficiality, and she wants to be one! she apparently wants to spend her precious time doing silly little dance routines and shaking people's hands at conventions instead of dedicating it all to proper hero work! and Kuroiro still has a crush on her! that witch...!

and you see, Kinoko isn't actually a shallow person. what motivates her to become and idol hero isn't selfishness (refer to my old Kinoko headcanon list - some things in there are a tiny bit outdated but my headcanon on why she wants to be an idol is still the same!). except Kuroiro doesn't get to know that at first so he remains bewildered and conflicted for quite some time - and i just think that's funny y'know? he eventually learns more about her (second hand, they don't directly talk to each other much, in canon i think Kinoko doesn't even pay much attention to him in general 😭) and starts to change his mind, probably falling even harder in the process - but still the whole thing is complete disaster on his side. he was always shy around her, now there's also... all this, no wonder he can't talk to her at all!!

so, to sum it up: Kuroiro is intense, he's surprisingly idealistic, he's tragically insecure, and he has some very rigid ideas about himself and the world around him that he probably needs to let go of. he's just a mess of a teenager with a lot of to figure out - and he does figure it out, he does get his happy ending eventually! (a conversation with Kinoko, among other things, is something that definitely would be a crucial part in his,, character arc, i guess? and y'know what, while i do really like them as a couple, i think them just getting to talk things out is a "happy ending" regardless of whether they end up together)

OH and by the way: i'm not saying that he's like, going against himself at all times! he's not an actual master schemer or a complete lone wolf but a lot of things about how he acts are perfectly genuine. his affinity for all things dark is genuine, his interest in taboos is genuine, and his love for theatrics is also genuine! in that matter, it's actually not a phase lol he's just like that :] would be blasphemous to say otherwise, that's what we all love him for..!

aaand this concludes my little essay about one of my favorite 1b kids!! the picture of him that i have in my head is very clear, that's why he's the first character that i chose to write this kind of post about - i'm just pretty confident about the hcs i have for him haha. i'm also thinking about writing a more lighthearted list of hcs to complete the vision (ya know, like the good ol days) because there's STILL so much that i haven't shared since it didn't fit this post - so stay tuned for that if you enjoyed this!! see you next month probably

[chimken-nugget]

Drawing each arc I complete:

Power of Three

"gee whiz, i sure am glad crowfeather's not my dad !!" said crowfeather's accident babies for the tenth time that day.

Guess who my favourites were for this arc challenge (impossible) /j

(You can find my drawings for arc 1 and arc 2 here)

Anyways,, my thoughts on this arc (a long-ish read):

Leafpool and Squilf my beloved !!!! The only ppl whose reactions were reasonable to the secret reveal were Brambleclaw and Hollyleaf, given their characterisation. Everyone else's reactions were over the top and stupid. Lionblaze thinking he's not a clan cat anymore was stupid. Wth is Firestar then ???? 'one of the good ones' ?????

The Tribe cats book (Outcast) was a disaster that was only necessary to establish the Jaywing-Jayfeather connection. I may be one of the few ppl who genuinely loves the journeying and the tribe (i loved TNP), but this book reeked of colonialist ideology.

Sol being a professional BSer is so funny, brother just said whatever, and the clan cats made him more of a threat than he actually was. What proof did Blackstar have that Sol predicted the Eclipse besides the words of Thunderclan apprentices LOL

Literally all Sol had to do was sit around and look pretty, say some vague crap, and everyone ate it up LOL

Erin Hunters pls bring back Sol

Everyone loves Purdy. Your dad loves Purdy, your adoptive mum loves Purdy, the old racist woman loves Purdy. YOU love Purdy.

also,, 3 'controversial' hot takes:

1) I enjoyed TNP more than POT. idk maybe it's cos leafpool is my favourite character, so im biased, but POT seemed to drag and was a hard read with all the brooding and 'im better than everyone' comments hollypaw, jaypaw, lionpaw made every 5 seconds.

The last 2 books were peak tho- Erin Hunters cooked hard with the fire scene and death berries scene.

2) Hollyleaf not being one of the 3 is actually a good decision. ik the fandom has never rly liked this fact since it's due to such a silly reason (the authors couldn't think up a power in time), but I think not having a power made her story so much more impactful. Hollyleaf *wanted* to be special in any way possible (by being med cat / leader etc.), so to be able to make peace with the fact that she's not 'special' in the way she thought she'd be, is good character growth for her in the next arc. Hollyleaf's 2 character traits in POT was 'warrior code' and 'wanting to be special' so both of these elements being completely shattered for her was probably one of the more interesting things to happen in this arc.

3) Squilf and Leaf keeping the secret makes sense to me. When I read Leafpool's Wish, I was under the impression that starclan was insistent on the 3 having a "nuclear, stable family" which squilf and leaf interpreted as having to keep it a secret from everyone else (they were probably planning to take it to the grave).. I agree with the fandom that this secret thing wasn't handled in the best way, practically everyone already knew about the crowleaf situation BUT I do also think that starclan had their (stupid but kinda valid) reasons. The biggest reason would probably be to have the supposed 3 grow up loyal to the code from birth and in a healthy family, so that they wouldn't crash out when they discovered their powers and turn evil or smthn..

They were kits born from 2 codes broken, so knowing this from birth would maybe have them not rly regard the code with the same importance as others. Also, as accepting as thunderclan is, being a moderate clan is such a low bar to cross that the racism and discrimination Holly, Lion, and Jay would've faced would still be pretty horrible. Arc 2 and 3 brush up a lot on the fact that the other clans (and even cats in thunderclan) are unhappy with the way Firestar is accepting of anyone. If worst came to worst, I do think Firestar would have been pressured to exile Leafpool and her children, dooming the clans as 2/3 kin of kin are no longer in the clans. We already saw the clans threatening Firestar over Sol.. so yeah...

of course I'm just reading through the lines and the Erin Hunters in all honestly likely did it to put drama in their kittycat soap opera LOL

However, as the no.1 Leafpool defender, that is my take

[yourfaveisintersex]

Hi! Not a headcanon... I wanted your opinion, since I think you have trustworthy takes on intersex issues. I hope it's alright to ask you for advice...

When I was 14, I was told by my gynecologist that I had "more testosterone than a female should." So, this entire time I believed that I had hyperandrogenism, likely PCOS or NCAH because my symptoms matched up. I have thick, dark body hair, and I grow hair on my chest. I also have the other symptoms like irregular periods, acne, oily skin, and unfortunately ovarian cysts... A partial fused labia & well I accidentally tore my hymen.... while engaging in activities I won't detail. 🫠 I also had a very early puberty. I developed body hair before everyone else at around 6-7 years old and started suffering from premenstrual pelvic pain at 9, and had my first official bleeding menstruation at 10.

I was bullied a lot, called the h slur, the t slur and excluded a lot from things with girls because I was seen either as a freak, or a boy pretending to be a girl. I faced a lot of issues through my life for having androgynous features. When I was told that I had "more testosterone than a female should" by my gyno at 14, I was put on estrogen based birth control.

I've been active in intersex spaces and even said I was intersex myself. I was so sure that I was intersex because of my personal experiences and symptoms.

But now I'm confused. Apparently my PCP did a testosterone test on me without my knowledge when I was 18. I was not informed about this test, nor prepared to get any labs done. It was late in the day, and I had not fasted that day... which you're supposed to do before you get labs. I was also on estrogen based birth control. I just recently saw the results from these labs when checking my chart, and did some research. Based on the numbers recorded, I would have hypoandrogenism, not hyperandrogenism... and that doesn't... sound right??? I would not be this hairy if I had low androgens, right??? Right???

I plan on getting this retested because this doesn't sound accurate. Is it possible that my PCP deliberately fucked with my test results by not instructing me to fast and having me on estrogen? Even if I somehow turned out to have hypoandrogenism as a "female" (which I doubt) am I still intersex? Also, side note, is it possible to have normal testosterone levels while having symptoms of hyperandrogenism?

Thank you in advance for your response... <3 /p

Okay, this is long so let's break this down + yeah you're fine to ask for advice I practically solicit it in my FAQpost

So uh. Hey you just happened to ask for advice by someone who had hypoandrogenic total T levels while having symptoms of (mild) hyperandrogenism lol lmao. Get your SHBG (Sex-hormone binding globulin), albumin, free & bioavailable testosterone tested ASAP.

Hypoandrogenism CAN be an intersex trait, but you also have like... hyperandrogenic symptoms still. And faced direct intersexism as a result of that. If you're doubting you can contribute your voice, of course you can??? I'm so sorry your Dr.s seem to be Weird. I don't know much about estrogen messing with T levels much (if anyone can contribute info it'd ve appreciated), but I know a Bit about T converting into estrogens because. Happens to me. Nonbinary estrogen levels moment. Obviously get a proper retest of total T when you can, and yes estrogen Miiight fuck with your hormonal test results but just like. By default if you're on hormonal medications your test results are prone to being altered. Can't rely on my FSH and LH because I have the birth control implant lol

I think the most important think to point out is that you very much still have the intersex experience. You can't suddenly like. Not be intersex. Same way perisex ppl can't "become/transition to intersex", and the thought intersex people can become perisex is like. The goal of society to erase intersexuality.

[lullabyalikpoptarot]

Enhypen Ideal Type Reading

Okay, wanting to do a little bit of a lighter reading here with my faves and do what ideal traits they like in a partner at the moment, so let's see what we have here.

Heeseung (2 of Cups/Man Holding Coin) He would want someone emotionally committed to him. He would want a strong bond. 2 souls as one. This came to me again; it is like Libra's have this mindset with relationships. He would want someone he can emotionally bond with and someone he can be let his emotions out to. I get a sense of intermingling, getting lost in another, which I can say may not be always great, but there is a sense of harmony and letting each other in. I just keep getting someone emotionally available, so that is important, also someone who validates his emotions. He would want someone who is very goal oriented and keeps their eye on the prize. Although, he wants a strong connection. He also has his goals and his career, so he would want someone with that energy as well. He would want his partner to put in the work, that could be in a relationship, but also in other things in general. The oracle card is giving me Cap energy, so he would want someone with that type of energy in that aspect. He would want a partner with their own independence as well. Lol he gave me a lot here.

Jay (5 of Wands/Patience) Okay, that 5 of wands kind of threw me off, but with the patience card. His ideal partner would be someone who may be able to deal with his argumentative and combative nature, someone willing to handle that, who isn't afraid to argue and go back and forth, but not in a toxic way. Arguments happen, so he may want someone who isn't too sensitive to that. That can be able to work through a disagreement, but also can go toe to toe with him. He wants someone on the calmer and more patient side. I am just getting someone who can deal with his sh** I am guessing he struggled in past relationships, because of this to be honest. This isn't giving me toxic vibes, just someone who can be combative and defensive, so arguments can tend to happen to him. I believe it is any relationship he is in, including friendships, I see this with the members, so he wants someone to be patient enough to work with him through that. Okay, guess they will give me a lot, boys like to talk.

Jake (The Emperor/Attachment) Well, this is giving me not the best vibes here, so yeah, Jakey sweetie what is this? Is this his ideal type or is this just about him? Jake this was supposed to be light dude, why am I getting this!? *Sighs* why do I not want to say this, so he may like to be in control, it is like he would want the person attached to him, like he would have the final say. Bruh I don't like this, like I can spin this as he likes someone powerful and strong, but then the attachment card is weird, this feels like more his energy, which means he overpowers his ideal partner or partner. It just like he runs things. Umm, this dude has to work on how he approaches love and relationships, because this energy isn't it. I have worked with his energy deeper before and he has healing to do, because this need to control and dominate in relationships isn't healthy sweetie, sorry. I will move on. No judgment here, but I go with what I get. I wish to not get these cards, but energy doesn't lie, and it isn't always rainbow and sunshine's. I always keep it real here. Some souls just need more healing than others.

Sunghoon (5 of Cups/Third Chakra Archangel Chamuel) I can see him as wanting someone who gives him space and has their independence. I think he likes a partner who can give him space when he is feeling down, instead of hovering over him. I see him wanting a partner that isn't overbearing, or constantly asking him how he feels all the time, like give him space, why do I feel it is coming from him. I wonder if he felt suffocated in the past by partners like that. I see him as the type that wouldn't want to talk about his feeling to be honest, so he would want that person to give him space, until he is able to open up. It is like give him space to process things. He really is trying to stress this, he wants space when he is sad, very important to him. He would not want an overly emotional sensitive person to be honest. I am getting drawn to someone constantly asking about how he feels and if he is okay and him not really liking that. But I also do hope he doesn't completely shut his partner out, because that isn't healthy, but I think what he is trying to tell me is when he is down, he wants his space and when he works through it himself, he will talk. Omg that was a lot. He would want someone strong, motivated and determined. I am getting someone with strength, will and determination. Who can endure a lot that comes to them. Yeah, he wouldn't want a highly emotional, sappy person who doesn't do anything about their problems. He wants someone who gets things done. Oh wow, these boys got a lot to say. I am happy they are sharing a lot, thanks.

Sunoo (The Fool/Rest and Rejuvenation) He wants someone carefree, simple and fun. He doesn't want someone who wants a strong commitment. This just seems he wants someone he can start new beginnings; it is like always a new beginning with that person. He wouldn't want someone to be too boring or predictable. He wants it to be new and fresh. He wants someone who is always willing to go on adventures and try something new. I don't see him as liking stability and comfort in relationships. That may get boring for him. He likes someone who enjoys their space and me time. He would like someone who doesn't stress a lot about things and does things to clear their mind. I also see him liking someone who gives him space to clear his mind and deal with his stuff. I can also see him liking a mentally strong person. Yeah, he doesn't like things to be too serious. I'll see if this pops up when I do their reading on how they are as a boyfriend.

Jungwon (The Hanged Man/Hostilities) Okay, Jungwon you are my bias, but what is this? I can see him as wanted someone very reflective and open to gain insight to difficult situations. He would want someone tough and strong, maybe not afraid to go toe to toe with him, like bicker with him. These cards give me two different vibes. One is very calm and serene and the other argumentative and hostile. He likes someone with both qualities I am guessing here. I can see him as liking someone who can handle difficulties that comes to them and can stay calm under pressure. I see him as someone who likes someone who takes it all in stride, the good and the bad. I don't think he knows what he likes or thinks about it too much, because I am not getting much here. Like most was me guessing, he seems to not care about ideal types to be honest, which yeah, you like what you like, no point in ideal types. This is why he is my bias, we are pretty similar.

Ni-Ki (4 of Swords/Door to Romance) Okay, the door to romance surprised me because I don't see this boy giving af about romance and love too much, so didn't think I would get much here. As a Venus in Cap myself, as Ni-Ki is, love is not a top priority for us and doesn't come easy. Anyway, I feel that means he may want someone to approach him, rather than he do it. Like the person has to sweep him off his feet, or make him feel something, before he ever thinks of allowing them in. He may want someone who makes romantic gestures towards him, who flirts with him a bit, or open up to him. He may entertain it, but not sure it will come into a full-blown relationship. He would want someone he can feel comfortable with, that he can feel safe with. He wants peace, absolutely no drama, same Ni-ki, same. You got to be able to give him space and be a safe place for him to ever think of letting romance in. Ah, maybe that is what this all means. Provide a sanctuary for him, and he will allow you in, and let romance in. And he may even charm you himself. I am getting, be my safe place and I will let you in.

Okay, this was interesting, not sure what I was expecting here, but this came out better than I thought. Although, I did want this to be a little lighter, that just not how Tarot works lol I will definitely continue this with the other groups I work with.

[shadowknightapologist]

eirene concept n.2...

this time she's wearing clothes bc the full was making me cranky and with her clothing style i get to cover a lot of it LMAO

in this she's supposed to be wearing a mantilla (traditional spanish headcovering, mostly used for religious purposes and/or worn during important events :3) and a himation (styled to cover her entire body!!).

eirene is supposed to be mysterious. she goes out of her way to hide her more notable features and appear human as to not frighten that which she has swore to protect. as i develop her design i'll probably add more "goddessy" traits, but this was mostly to figure out her outfit and color palette.

because i want to differentiate between her and aphmau, i've decided that eirene will be purple and aphmau will be orange. this has to do with color symbolism but i don't wanna get into it right now LOL. it's also intended to connect her to shadrach as i associate him very strongly with purple.

omm i think that's it for now... hopefully soon i'll narrow down her design bc good god this is sucking the life out of me /silly (any success i get from her will be short-lived) (there are... six other characters to design) (and that's just the divine warriors </3).

[parkingdumpy]

I've been thinking a lot recently about the ways the concept of yin and yang were incorporated into the the sf3 twins' characterization n stuff, and I've been trying to include that idea into my hcs too

yin is supposed to be retractive and passive, which makes a lot of sense for yun, who's canonically less into fighting and more doing it for the love of the game. I always imagined that he trains less for this reason. he's just content where he is, as long as he's powerful enough to protect hong kong

but yang is described as active, expansive, and repelling, which fits a lot with him as a character. he's the more driven one of the two, and the motivation behind that drive is also expansive in nature; he wants to match/surpass his brother's skills. But he also has the desire to stand out in comparison to yun, just as yang repels from yin.

another aspect of the concept that I find really interesting in the twins is the idea that there is always yin within yang and yang within yin (the dots in the yin-yang symbol). yes, yang is generally the active brother, but he's also more level-headed and is the one following around yun while he gets into trouble. and yun is passive, but he also instigates more fights, he's flashy and attention-seeking. They're both pretty flashy and cocky, but yang has more of an air of nonchalance to him

and the idea of yin and yang being two opposite halves of one greater whole lines up with the way I perceive the two too, I love them both so much individually and they have their own likeable traits, but I think the most interesting and compelling aspect of them is how they play off of one another, their relationship with and feelings towards each other, and the comparison (subtilely and not so subtilely) suggested between them.

I love playing up these dichotomies between the twins whenever I write/think about them, its super important to me that they each have these vastly different perspectives and behavioural habits despite being raised together in the same city with the same family their whole lives. I think that naturally with them being so close, they're both used to each other's behaviour, but they understand less of exactly why their brother acts the way they do. I find that a lot of the conflict that naturally starts brewing between them whenever I write and think about them is fundamentally born from any inability to engage with and understand each other's unique perspective, and I find that really interesting to work with

im not rlly sure how to end this little ramble lol but I think the twins are much deeper and more interesting than people give them credit for ... !!

[umbra-borealis]

Dimitri Lousteau is the most 'human' villain in Sly Cooper

Hello and welcome to my TEDtalk, I've been meaning to type out my yapping for a long time but always talked myself out of it because I mean, this is coming from a guy with Dimitri for a pfp and I figured people would just take it as a guy on tumblr simping for a weird lizard but no. The reasons I care for Dimitri the way I do goes pretty deep and I could sit here and talk about it point by point but to save us both some time (and because I am DEAD tired) I made a graph!

I used Luciano, my little sona, to personify myself in this.

I focused mainly on formative things and similarities in personality without inserting headcanons, even if based on traits or even symptoms I recognize. Most of these are rather straight forward but some run a little deeper. The funny pattern here (maybe aside from the drug thing lol) is that there's a high likelihood that you reading this right now can at least relate to just one or two things on those list and while you could argue that you could do the same with other characters, I picked these traits because in my opinion they ride that thin line between just relatable enough to apply to a lot of people, but not too superficial to be on the same an interest or hobby. Anyone can get upset when angry, it's HOW you express that anger that says something about you as a person for instance.

I also want to quickly mention that yes, a LOT of characters in Sly Cooper are very human, but I said 'villain' for a reason. After all I don't think your average college kid can relate to Contessa, Rajan or Panda King because mass brainwashing, destroying villages and being a literal drug lord are bordering on supervillain and that's not what Dimitri is. A supervillain can be relatable to a degree as well, but it makes sense that the Panda King had to have a whole Moment TM (several really) to come to terms with the kind of person he allowed himself to become. When we see Dimitri in Sly 3, he seems to have already done this perhaps because his sins aren't nearly as great. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

I'll insert a read-more here but I'd like to ask you to keep reading anyway if you can because my biggest pet peeve is that Dimitri is seen as a dumb, sleazy (and old??? which is dumb and I got math to back up that he's not in fact in his 40s during Sly 2 lmao) lizard who's only good as a level 1 boss for beginners to learn the game and all he's remembered for, though fair, is his manner of speech and not what he's REALLY saying. None of you ever picked up on what he was throwing down so I'm going to spell it out for you.

(PS I have ADHD and it's 3 AM so go easy on me this is coming from the HEART baby)

To make it easier on myself and you, I'm going to start sectioning the word soup in my head into four categories based on Dimitri's enterprises and roles and just kinda... waffle on about my thoughts regarding them. I'll start superficial and work my way down to the Deep Shit. Feel free to skip around to whatever interests you since I include some lore too, though changes are you're already aware of said lore.

Lets start with:

Dimiti, the club manager.

Nightclubs, and the people that run them tend to have a bit of a sleazy stereotype attached to them, which I suppose is fair. Though a large chunk is attributed to movies and other media, there were in fact some really large and important movements surrounding nightlife and club culture. Just look up the Club Kids if you want to go down a rabbit hole, in short they were a fairly large group of partiers from the 90s who contributed a LOT to fashion and art movements as well as being generally very fluid when it came to gender. Unfortunately that too would eventually be plagued by drugs and members getting addicted to drugs. Again, I digress.

Dimitri is seen partying in the intro of his chapter in Sly 2,

which is a nice touch because not only is it in-character, it's something that would actually happen. Owners of a popular joints would be popular or just enigmatic figures that would regularly get subjected to patrons schmoozing up to them. Some weren't a fan but there were many that soaked up the attention, bought rounds on the house when business was good, maybe get a little TOO cocky with confidence. It's a bit too simple to look at Dimitri in relation to all this info and say 'no doi he was in it for the money it checks out.' because if you spend enough time in his club or just, in the safe house after placing the bug there's signs of more going on.

We KNOW Dimitri is a criminal and he did his whole art forgery business on the side, or maybe it's the other way round? Either way he seemed fairly confident in his skills with this. His biggest risk being that time he tried to marry someone over a STATUE. (Really dude?) So then why was he so damn paranoid? While you could argue that he was sippin' his own supply I don't think that's what it was. He was so paranoid he played his music super loud in almost all areas of the club JUST to keep his security detail awake through-out night and day, whenever his club wasn't open to the public. To compensate he would promise them they could all 'retire early'. with that fake confidence chuckle that masks a sense of 'haha please don't abandon me'

So, ever heard of Imposter Syndrome? Because his behavior as a club owner SCREAMS it. He wasn't JUST cocky and sleazy, he was simply fitting in with the culture of the time because *everyone* was overly confident, over confidence was something to be admired, something to look at and go 'yeah that guy has it figured out' while in reality most struggled with something, anything. So what is Imposter Syndrome? To keep it short and blunt, the overwhelming feeling that you're not worthy of your accomplishments. We know that Dimitri is a 'failed' artist who turned to forging art to make money, it could just be a sense of guilt telling him something he's not ready to hear so he starts overcompensating and this insecurity bleeds into Sly 3 after Sly puts him in his place. His success with this insanely toxic coping mechanism lands him a new enterprise.

Dimitri, the Spice distributor.

Rather than going chronological, I'm going through the 'layers' that is this lizard. So if his career as a club owner is the tip of the ice berg with some neat little facts and info about the stereotype he conveys, this subject is a tier deeper. Dimitri the Spice distributor is Dimitri the next level criminal, or so he thinks. When you think about it, it's pretty strange that they gave Dimitri some Clockwerk parts at all. He was never mentioned by the other Klaww Gang members and thus seemingly not missed either when he was the first to get busted. In fact, nobody was upset that their DISTRIBTOR was arrested, putting a hold on their primary income... or so we thought until the Contessa was revealed to have a rather large and lucrative side hussle Dimitri probably could never compete with. Dimitri was expendable, sure he had a role and he played it well but he was also a loss they could cope with without much harm done to their wallets or their pride.

I think about it often, Dimitri in his jail cell, maybe hearing from another criminal or even his lawyer after the whole Clock-La thing about the full scope of the plan. He might've gotten a reduced sentence for ratting the other members out because if you think back to his legendary conversation with Sly he really doesn't seem to know what he's talking about. ("What is it with clocks bro!?") All of Dimitri's other crimes aside, he was young and naive, Sly 3 reveals he came from some form of poverty as well so it makes sense that he'd chase easy money. That's all it was though, he wanted the money and the fame, he didn't want to brainwash an entire city, he didn't know about the giant robot owl. He's once again left feeling like a failure, this time one that was easy to fool and all the confidence he had as a criminal would've seeped out of him, starting this weird cycle of him trying something only to be caught breaking the law and ending up where he began.

Like I said all of this would bleed into Sly 3 and it's pretty damn neat that for how little lines he had and how little he was on screen, they managed to convey this well in my opinion. By the time we reach Sly 3, most of us don't remember him as a Spice distribtor at all. Which leads me to...

Dimitri the Artist.

Being an artist is a pretty broad term and while we know Dimitri as a painter, I think he applies his artist mindset in way, way more. He's genuinely creative an smart, he thinks out of the box to protect his secrets and to cover his tracks. His identity as an artist is also his most vulnerable and 'real' self. Folks will say art is about self expression and usually mean conveying complex topics with pretty pictures or thought provoking stories, however it can be apparent in smaller ways too and the most obvious thing for Dimitri is his business in forging art. Think about it this way:

Picture you don't speak a LICK of english, you're from a lower in-come family or even straight up poverty but you grew up on tall tales of your grandpa being a total badass who lived freely and seizes every opportunity he could to make money... or take it rather but you get the idea. Your grandpa used his talents as a diver and deep down, you know what your talent is. It's art. So you somehow manage to move across the world to Paris, go to an art school work your ass off to develop your own style, your own identity and when it came to making a name for yourself you were rejected super hard. You're now probably in debt, in a foreign country and all you're known for is being the art community's clown.

One thing that gets overlooked is that Dimitri's paintings aren't actually that bad.

He very clearly knows the basics quite well, he's using color theory to shade and add depth but as he goes from student to independant artist, he breaks away from the basics and develops a style. His color use becomes brighter, he adds little stars just because why not? He likes em! This style is PERFECT for the nightlife club scene he ends up in down the line of course, but in the world of pretentious parisian artist hipsters? Absolutely not. So while he's just being himself, he's shown that that isn't allowed, that wont get him success. It reminds me of artists who say shit like 'I'll just learn to draw furry porn I guess!' thinking it's a guaranteed money printer (heh) and whether they enjoy making that kind of content is irrelevant, which leads to burn out or in case they DO find success, imposter syndrome. The dread that you do not deserve this recognition because it's not something you're actually that passionate about, not something you want to be known for. Say what you will about Dimitri but he never compromised. And while the cutscene shows shoddy painted depictions of classical paintings, I think this was more to illustrate him forging paintings to a younger audience than imply he was a bad painter as just before those crappy version, we see what's probably the REAL version he would've painted and sold.

This is conjecture on my part but I have to believe it because well, art forgery is HARD. You'd have to actually be a freaking genius to do it and sell it for so high, you can just afford what is basically a freaking opera house in PARIS and turn it into a nightclub. Also did I mention Dimitri just, HAS a ~mansion~ in Monaco? Because he does.

I've also always liked that scene for the expression on his face. It's smug, it's so full of petty, passve aggressive anger, a stubborness to admit defeat and instead to just 'prove a point' even if that point is lost to the means being SUPER illegal. That being sad, I don't think any of us feel bad over this man stealing a couple thousand from billionaire pockets. Billionaires that probably have their own little illicit ways to get that cash. Funny... It seems Sly isn't the only one who steals from other criminals.

And you might've stuck around this long and gone 'Umbra, get to the fucking POINT already." to which I have good news.

Dimitri, the Marine Iguana.

My favorite part, feel free to skip ahead to this headline if you want.

So who is this guy anyway? Well, from Sly 3 we see that he has a mother, a sister and his grandparents and that's about it as far as we can tell.

Just look at that smile! He looks like your average, awkward teenager. No struggling on the streets from what we can tell, no bullying by bigger kids, no weird sociopathic tendencies, no childhood trauma or grudges. The events that changed him seem to all have happened after he left for Paris. Sure it aint much to go off of but even if his life was hard, it seemed he was close with his grandfather and got to know him for a decent couple of years. Marine Iguanas are, like the name implies, an aquatic species of reptile. They're well adapted to land but due to low food availability in-land, they migrated to the beaches and started living off of sea algae, learning how to dive in the process. Even in Sly 2 the devs included plenty of references to Dimitri's affinity for water. The windows in the dancefloor area of his club are partially submerged, there are two massive aquariums in his office, he lives on a boat (or hides there anyway) and has several water features but inside and outside his club.

When you take a step back and look at all that, Dimitri is... just a guy who left his home country, his family, to follow a dream only to have that dream shatter and he's left to pick up the pieces all alone, making poor choices in the process. Choices based on anger and a broken heart. And the truth of the matter is that ALL of this, could happen to anyone. Granted in varying different ways as not everyone's life is the same and not everyone will make the same choices but I think many of us had a dream career as a kid only to become a jaded adult who thinks it's unrealistic or only does that thing as a hobby, I think there's many of us that remember the moment our hearts were broken and we realized the cold, unforgiving nature of real, adult life.

We see the effect of ALL of this come to a head in Sly 3, when at first he's not sure if he should still be mad at Sly for putting him in jail while he's currently the only guy he knows that COULD break him back out of jail as well. He still overcompensates, he's still overly confident and he put himself in that cell but still, he honors his word and helps Sly and Bentley find their friend. Then in Holland we see him behind a bar, seemingly as if he's actually got a job as a bartender there. Heck, he DOES have a job! He's the announcer! He may not super like it but he's being humbled by it all the same and when Sly comes for help a second time, the bravado is gone for a moment. He expresses genuine fear, not necessarily for his own safety but for losing a job, for *failing*. Of course the right answer in this scenario is to hype up his confidence again. And because Sly has proven himself to be trustworthy in the past he figures he can trust him with a favor of personal, sentimental value. If anyone would understand how it feels to have your family name dishonored and an heirloom stolen, it's Sly and Dimitri knows that damn well.

I think this is about as real as Dimitri can get, aside from the whole scuba gear thing. I know the gang is disguised but I don't think Dimitri is at all. I think that's just... what he likes to wear, further making me think he's just a regular guy with so much heart ache he lashe out in some pretty vile ways. Tortured artists are known to do some crazy shit after all. And while he continues to be his funny eccentric self we know him to be, he starts to have his first real moments of genuine care and loyalty while a part of the Cooper Gang. He tells Bentley he 'has his own flavor' which is his way of telling him that he's unique an valid the way he is. He dives after Sly's cane in VERY dangerous waters, risking injury or even his life, no questions asked. He sends Bentley postcards and letters to let his friend know he's safe and doing well. But perhaps something that hits me harder than any of that, is how angry and shocked Dimitri looks upon Sly's 'retirement announcement'.

Here he was thinking he made a friend out of Sly, and just like that he was gone. It makes me wonder if he held onto that grudge or not but a part of me likes to imagine that he didn't. I think his time with that gang made him realize that although he might not understand and he might be upset, it's not all about him. If anything he silently continued the rivalry by seeing how many girls he could cram into one post card with him to one up Sly's act of running off with a girl himself or perhaps he took it as a sign to make a career switch as well. Either way, Dimitri ended up changing for the better, he became himself in the end. A sweet, goofball iguana who loves the ocean and loves to paint. Making money became a nice bonus rather than his main focus.

Coming from a similar, rough background, having gone to therapy and trying to find my place in the world, this gives me hope. Hope that if I look hard enough, I can find my niche too and that being myself is the best I can be. If you read all this, thank you. I fgured it was best to just get it ALL out at once. I hope it was a fun read or made you look at Dimitri a little differently.