#while bitching at me to stay home because her immune systems fucked

[vernvirt]

i can't be the only one who's really dreading the summer, right?? the minute the semester ends, im just supposed to have my shit figured out on my own. im supposed to have a job figured out or an internship lined up but ive spent the past two months trying not to crack and there isn't a chance in hell ill be able to live up to this in the next two weeks. my state has just about abandoned quarantine so im expected to just. go back to business as usual as though people arent still dying en masse at rising rates. i can't do this. i can't pretend to go about my life as though the fact that we're in the middle of a pandemic is null and void. i just can't do this.

[kireihan]

ship headcanons: mc gets sick

Leviathan x Bernadette:

is it the time?? the long awaited episode where the love interest gets sick??  hello?? his time has come

except he knows like batshit abt what to do when his lover is sick

spends like an hour freaking the f u c k out because bern?? are you ok?? talk to me honey are you dying?? is everything alright??

i mean, he knows that you need the towel and the soup so he isn’t entirely hopeless

no sickies in his room pls and thanks, cant have no germs on his precious figures. plus where would bern sit in his room? there is no rest only weeb here.

has a cooler body temperature compared to the other brothers. his hands are always fucking cold man, who needs a towel when you have levi’s hands? 

watches anime with her. then realizes it’s actually straining her, so he actually holds back from watching to wait for her

pls he tries his best

Solomon x Horizon:

“wdym you aren’t coming over today” “dude im sick” “sick what? are you sick of my shit? too bad you have to deal with me~ “no im like sick sick i cant” “shit im sorry hold on ill be right there babe”

snip snap he works his fucking magic and she’s well again

except his magic makes her feel like 10x as worse before becoming better the next day so she would rather not do it that way

solomon thinks she’s a pussy, brave it out for like 12 hours and ur fine the next day “just do it, i’ll make you feel better” “12 hours of torture? for a cold? hell nah”

hori is a bit more sensitive when she’s sick so solomon isn’t as annoying

treats her rather nicely actually

“babe please sit down” “no i wanna-” “n o” “i’m fine” “you are not fine do you feel your own fever- oh there she went. she fainted.” 

Lucifer x Lia

lmao bitch wont even touch you unless he has gloves and a mask bc what will happen if he gets sick?? god forbid he has to take a day off

she insists on going to school but lucifer makes her stay at home

lucifer is really sick of her getting so irritable like my god just cooperate stop snapping at him 

hires the royal doctor to take care of her because his princess deserves the best

and because he’s too prideful to admit he knows shit when it comes to taking care of a sick human

caught a cold afterwards bcause god hates him

thats funny of me to say

sits by the bed and spoon feeds lia soup during the peak of her illness

Barbatos x Julia

barbatos barely has to do anything because julia is prepared. she’s a competent witch

that doesn’t stop him from fretting on the inside

isn’t as overbearing/skittish as the others, but makes sure he checks in on her everynow and then

julia finds out he makes insanely good soup, i mean she already knew that but he cooked it specifically for her when she’s sick

sometimes julia will fake sick to eat it

she does become a lot grumpier and kinda clingy when sick, since her senses are a little messed up with the cold making it a little harder to perceive things so she leans on barbatos for this

julia once tripped and fell when she was heading to the bathroom during a high fever and barb had a fucking heart attack

Mammon x Reese

someone actually save these two. like my god.

mammon becomes really sulky in school and refuses to do anything without reese around 

reese will haul himself to school but mammon hauls his ass right back to bed then proceed to complain about reese’s absence. 

“dude you okay?” “yeah it’s jsut a little stuffy nose.” “you don’t look very good.” “just a little dizzy, i’m sure it’ll go away” “bRUH-”

mammon slams open the door to catch reese streaming on deviltube because reese is bored

back to bed a g a i n mammon is about to lose his cool

mammon knows shit about taking care of a sick human but this is his human you’re talking about, so he goes and buys expensive medicine

claims his finger slipped when buying it lmao

eventually mammon falls asleep next to reese’s bed

and catches a cold from being the idiot who continues to ask for kisses

Beelzebub x Sen

beelzebub is so confused but tries his best

goes to barbatos to learn how to make soup for sen because soup always makes him feel better

sen complains about feeling cold, and beel knows he has the highest body temperature out of the demons and has a pretty strong immune system from eating god knows what so he has no qualms about crawling into bed with sen and cuddling her so she’s warm

i mean she actually has a fever but sen slapped on one of those menthol cooling patches on her forehead so it’s gucci

beel’s hands are large and warm. instant heating pads. 

really attentive and sits by her bed like a sad puppy asking if she needs anything 

since he has a habit of guarding lucifer’s room when said brother is sick, he guards sen’s room too. just kinda sits in front with his ddd and a pile of snacks, inconveniencing everyone who tries to pass by the hallway

Belphegor x Usako

walks around house of lamentation wrapped in a blanket and leaving tissues in her wake

why is she so mopey my god belphegor doesn’t have the energy for this. slaps a cold towel on her forehead and passes out on the floor

usako literally refuses to rest so belphe has to cast a sleeping spell on her to get her to stay down and recover

belphe goes to ask beel how to help usako get better since beel seems to have better success with sen

you have to realize belphie, sen and beel are like one of the only functional couples here ok.

“why are you so fussy just eat the medicine.” “sTOP FUSSING” “MY GOD JUST EAT IT” belphie is like yey close to flipping his shit

accidentally made her cry because she’s sensitive and belphie sighs really loudly as if to say “damn ur annoying” but goes to cuddle her anyways and presses kisses to her forehead to pacify her

she shows up the next day 100% genki genki and belphie is like “??? weren;t you just sniffling and coughing and having a fever yesterday what happened to you” 

Satan x Yen

satan is probably one of the only competent boyfriends here ngl

has read a ton of books and spends his time reading random things on the internet so he figures out what yen might need

except the damn girl is always sleeping and it’s time for her daily dose of medicine which unlike usako, she doesn’t kick up a fuss over eating. 

gets sick pretty easily and is prone to high fevers. satan ignores her complaining as he places cold towels on her back and forehead. 

yen’s usually too tired and sluggish to actually put up a struggle so there’s just a lot of verbal whining abt the cold 

becomes kinda childish when sick, when she’s really tired and about to fall asleep, she’ll tug on satan’s sleeve and ask him to stay a while

also gets really clingy and hates being alone 

but she’s asleep like 99% of the time lmao

[hatsukeii]

Pt.2 to the Karasuno boys during the coronavirus quarantine, this time it’s gonna be Kags, Yams, and Hinata w their s/o, which ig is gonna be you in a few situations.

🌊Kageyama🌊

- “How much milk do we have at home mom?”

- “Fuck, we’re running out of milk”

- “She really expects us to understand this shit? This is Zoom not fucking Khan Academy, she’s not that great.”

- Probably one of the bulk buyers Tsukishima shits on.

- Realises he only has one carton of normal milk at home.

- So this boy goes out and buys like 4 cartons of different flavoured milks. Strawberry? Chocolate? Banana? Melon? Yes.

- And do you think he doesn’t finish it? Ohohoho you are mistaken. This bitch somehow finishes all of them in the span of a week.

- Tries to write notes during online classes.

- Fails miserably.

- Does not understand a thing the teacher is saying.

- Would rather die than admit that to Hinata.

- He’s not allowed out of the house but you are.

- Which means study dates are a frequent event during the quarantine.

- You’re now his personal English and Science tutor.

- “What the fuck is a mitochondria?”

- “It’s the powerhouse of the cell sweetie.”

- Is so fond of you he voluntarily gives you some of the flavoured milk he fought middle aged women to buy, but he obviously would try to cover up that soft spot he has for you.

- “I had to snatch it from the fridge before a Karen who bought five of the same flavour did, you better finish it and grow the fuck taller.”

- Volleyball “practise” in his room after the tutoring.

- He teaches you how to do basic shit like receive, serve, and of course, set.

- You fail miserably all the time, just saying. But good news is, that doesn’t matter. None of it does.

-All Kageyama lives for is that cheeky smile every time you fuck up a move. That victory dance you do after you finally succeed. The tight hugs you give him, thanking him for teaching you how to play volleyball. It’s all those little things that he absolutely adores. He wouldn’t exchange you for the world.

🍃Yamaguchi🍃

- “Do you have your hand sanitiser?”

- “Put your mask on, stay safe!”

- “You’re out of masks? I’ll be right there, I have five extra boxes”

- Extra cautious about the virus because his immune system isn’t the best.

- Has a stash of food at home, ready to be cooked anytime.

- Isn’t allowed to go anywhere farther than the neighbourhood.

- Hates online classes with his whole heart, but still attends them to maintain his grades.

- Actually really smart, takes very nice notes in class.

- Anything you want or need, he’s gonna get it for you.

- Meat buns? No problem. Boba? Easy. Hotel? Trivago.

- Since you guys are good at different subjects, you go to his house to help him with English, Philosphy, and Biology.

- And he comes over to yours to help you with Maths, Chemistry, and History.

- And he surprisingly, likes subtle dark political humour. A lot.

- “What is covalent bonding supposed to be the fuck?”

- “Think about it like communism.”

- Yamaguchi is actually a very, very good teacher.

- (Way better than when you asked Tsukishima for help, but don’t tell him that or he’ll get salty.)

- Guess what ya boy Yams can cook to save both your lives.

- Every time he walks out of your house you’re equipped with five new quarantine recipes to make for your entire family.

- After every “tutoring” session, comes the movie session.

- You introduce him to classic movies and go all the way back to watch films from the 80s-90s.

- It’s been about 3 weeks and you’ve managed to watch Pulp Fiction, Dead Poet’s Society, Breakfast At Tiffany’s, Forrest Gump, Top Gun, all those oldies.

- Movie sessions consist of cuddles, forehead kisses, hair braiding, more kisses, tickle battles, and falling asleep on Yamaguchi, your head snuggled in his chest while he plays with strands of your hair, thinking about how lucky he is to have someone like you that cares.

☀️Hinata☀️

- “Hinata get your ass back to bed.”

- “It’s 5am dude lessons start at 8am go back to sleep.”

- “I swear I love you but I will block you.”

- Good luck getting his jumpy ass to sit the fuck down.

- Constantly waiting for the quarantine to end. (Spoiler alert: it’s gonna take about a month or two more.)

- Since he’s so used to getting up at 5am for volleyball training and school, his mental alarm clock wakes him up at 5am too, even though all he has to do is go on a website.

- Tries to catch up in class while calling Kageyama.

- Fails. Terribly.

- Doesn’t understand a thing the teacher says, even after bombarding her with questions.

- Probably doesn’t think he needs a mask, so you force him to wear one if he ever had to go out.

- Isn’t allowed out of the house at all because apparently someone in his neighbourhood was infected and diagnosed with COVID-19.

- You’re not allowed to go over either, so you send him all your notes, hoping he doesn’t fail his classes.

- Video calls you to ask for homework answers.

- “I’m not giving you the answers, but you can take my notes, or ask me if you need help.”

- You both have Netflix Party on your computers, so you use that to talk while binging Disney movies at ungodly hours.

- Secretly cries himself to sleep because oh my god this boy misses you so fucking much seriously.

- Gets made fun of by Natsu for being a pansy.

- “Shoyou, it’s not like your girlfriend’s dead, whatcha crying for?”

- Probably stares at photos of you in his phone, reimagining how it feels like for you to be by his side.

- Plans to take you out on as many dates as he can once this whole thing is over. Cuddles and kisses for hours are musts.

[itsdearsuga]

Grief: The Story of My First Major Loss.

Growing up, I only went to 2 funerals until I reached my 20’s.

My Grandfather, who was barely present in our lives. He was a man with his own set of issues, and we always had to stay in the car when we visited him those 3-4 times.

Then my late Pastor from Mowing Glade A.M.E Zion, who had mysterious health issues and eventually left us once the plug was pulled at a local hospital in Charlotte, where I once lived.

I was barely a 4th grader when both of these deaths occured in my life.

I always saw death as a catalyst for sympathy. I never truly understood it, I just knew it was a huge deal. If someone died in a person's life, I expected them to be out of school for like a month and for them to cry every 5 minutes. I just knew death to be this sad thing that was inevitable in people's experiences.

That was, until Granny’s diagnosis.

She was an avid snuff user, and growing up there was always a can of that black tar like substance that she spit out by the fireplace. I knew she spit in there but we always stayed as far away from that cursed can as possible. One day my cousin, sister and I knocked it over, and I honestly thought I was going to pass away my damn self. She used that stuff for over 50 years, some say since she was 8, and once I was in college, we received news that she had an extremely aggressive form of mouth cancer. When you’re a certified pessimist like myself from time to time, you’d probably hear the word cancer and think of the worse. But for me at that moment, it was a little different. I tried to muster up all the hope in the world for my grandmother. She cared for me and all of my cousins, she was my coffee buddy every sunday after church, I always made her laugh and we always sat on those rocking chairs on the porch, listening to the soft windchimes that clanged melodically in the countryside breeze, or played checkers in the cracker barrel before we were seated to go eat…  I remembered every bit of love and hope she gave me, and in that moment of hearing that news, I tried to return it all back to her. In all the things she handled in her years, it couldn’t be the snuff of all things that took her off this world. She held our family together, but unfortunately, the more sick she became, the more tensions rose amongst my loved ones. I never was the type that liked to talk in my family. It was a Hi then Bye kind of vibe when I walked in the room. Someone could look at my sketchbook, say I’m going to be the next picasso or something with an uncomfortable amount of enthusiasm and then keep it moving, It’s whatever. I only held long conversations with a select few in my family, but I typically kept to myself with a straight face. That’s where Granny came in with my nickname when I was kid. She called me “Suga” because of the irony of me being anything but. I hated that nickname for a long time, I thought it was to tease me, but she only called me that until, well, she passed. Her sickness was a long, grueling time in my life and my family’s lives. They fought over who took care of her, my aunts and cousins, and all I could do is watch the drama ensue or hear it over the phone from a distraught cousin all the way from Maryland. In the spring of 2018, our lives changed forever.

“Her tumor keeps coming back, they’re going to have to remove and replace the jaw.” These were the words I was told about the fate of my grandmother in the next coming weeks. This was also after she had ridiculous amounts of treatment. The granny I once knew as being a sturdy weight, eating alongside us , full of laughter and life, grew frail. She was always holding her jaw and groaning. She could barely say much without it causing her pain. It hurt like hell to see. I took time off of school and headed back to Charlotte for a little while, promising to handle my homework while I was gone. I barely slept that week. The hospital waiting room was full of loved ones during the operation, and I’ll never forget the moment before she was wheeled back. I was the last to see her, and that was the last time I heard Suga for quite awhile. Nonetheless, we played card games, visited the panera downstairs and anxiously sat and waited. Eventually, the surgery was over, and we went home while she was in recovery. Once back at the house, I only heard horror stories. One aunt said she looked like Emmett Till post surgery. I sat and listened to the hushed voices of all of my aunts as they talked about how she looked, but my mother hadn't seen her just yet. We were both worried and that was the first time I saw her cry. I could only hold her and try my best to reassure her that it can’t be that bad, but we had our own issues on top of this with our living situation, that would definitely be another blog post for another day. I stayed in my grandparents bedroom, anxiously doing my homework and talking on the phone to stay up and sane, drinking energy beverages and taking smoke breaks all night. It was hard, and I couldn’t sleep thinking about the major changes to a face that was so familiar to me. We eventually made our way to the hospital. When we arrived, I was definitely surprised. Her face was extremely swollen, and it looked as though her entire face was fused under the nose. I said nothing and when I walked in, my mother gave me a certain look as though it wasn't necessary to stay. I stayed. For days. If I wasn't by her bedside trying to teach her little signs in ASL that’d she’d eventually say whatever to and not use at all, or talking to her about how much of a pain in my the ass my classes were, I was in the lobby of the hospital, typing my essays tirelessly and staying sleep deprived. Eventually we went back to MD, and I only saw her from time to time when we went back home those few times. She didn't talk for more than 6 months, and phone calls were difficult, but when she got the ball rolling, she called my mom everyday and I eventually heard my nickname all over again. I was hopeful, until around valentines day of this year. I was working on a painting for her. One morning, she got really sick, with something like the flu, and the chemo and treatments were already too much for her immune system. I was at school that day, bitching about my work and getting annoyed at my dad's numerous text messages asking me where I was. My mom was in Greensboro for work at the time. I eventually came home and my dad told me to sit down.

Now at this point, I did experience my fair share of death, but nothing too close to me where I was broken. Nothing, besides Kaya maybe , but that loss broke me in regards to my place of empathy. And that story is another one in it’s own right. But I was truly oblivious to why my dad would need me to sit down so urgently. I guess a part of me was in a place mentally where I promised to see her again, and something in my psyche was reassuring myself that she wouldn't go anywhere until I could make that happen. Another part of me was too scared to hear what he had to say. Sure enough, I heard the worst. She was gone, and in that one moment, my entire world fell apart.

The drive after was the worst part.

I thought about the blackberry picking we did if we wanted a pie,

I thought about the times she took my scrap drawings and framed them, telling me that even the worst ones to me were everything to her.

I remember all the times I would hear my Nickname.

And everytime I heard it in my head, I was shattered all over again.

This was 6 months ago.

Now, I think I’m beginning to understand grief a little better. It feels like a never ending one way street, With an occasional traffic circle that doesn't tell you where the exits are going to take you.

Some exits take you on a beautiful scenic route, where you feel a little more comfortable to reminisce on the better days with that person, and some exits are rainy and disgusting. No matter how fast the windshields are going, you still can't see the road ahead even with the high beams on, and on top of that, you’re getting motion sickness, and it’s fucking brutal.

Grief is never a straight shot. It feels like one for a while, but the roundabouts are unexpected. Sometimes they show up after around a half a mile, and other times, they don't show up for about 7 or 8 miles.

Either way, they’re a journey that almost everyone takes, and it's okay if there's trouble on the trip because we’re human.

Love Always, Suga.

[fgodestinyawakenings]

Babylonia Section 21~Section 22(END)

Final day and final post of this Singularity before the impending doom at Solomon Singularity. Hope your Servants and sanity are ready because that’s some insane fight to be happened soon!

Section 21

At Uruk... The end of the world at last with Gilgamesh and 8 soldiers being the sole survivor against Tiamat... Time to destroy the demonic beast and Lahmus before we made way to find Gilgamesh!

Reaching to Gilgamesh at last... The end of the world in his eyes as he expected with Tiamat’s arrival getting closer... Our Chaldean Embassy swallowed in flames and in the Chaos Tide... Whether Tiamat hates humanity or not it’s another story if she even has a conscience in the first place after becoming Beast II

Arriving in Uruk at last... While Ishtar takes on Tiamat via the sky, we stand by with Gilgamesh against her on the ground. Yeah yeah you Tsundere king, we’re sticking with each other until the end of the Singularity!

Dingirs fired from the city wall all launched at Tiamat under Gilgamesh command by his own magical energy! He’s definitely not a half god without a reason--! GUDAS WATCH OUT THAT LIGHT!!!

.............. Gilgamesh... You..... You took the hit from Tiamat... Into your heart..... GOD DAMN IT, YOU’RE NOT MONTY PYTHON! THAT’S NOT JUST A MORTAL WOUND, THAT’S GOING TO KILL YOU DUMBASS!

Tch as Gilgamesh keeps on going... 3 more minutes before Tiamat arrives at where we are....! After we got knocked by the 8k Lahmus...  Before Ishtar could help us... That’s...!! KINGU!!!

Looks like Gilgamesh’s words finally reached his heart... Even if it’s a grail operating it... And... Enkidu... They came back... Even if it’s too far to reach, their words of wanting to talk to Gil will definitely reach! Kingu, Enkidu! It’s time to finish off Tiamat!!

As Kingu turned into the Chains of Heavens... We wake up to find Tiamat is being restrained by Kingu!! WHAT?! The Chain of Heavens broke!! And Eresh?!

Underworld is finally right below us. Ishtar and Gilgamesh discuss one last time about Enkidu’s passing before and now. Ishtar readies to launch a big blast for a big hole... One last talk with Gilgamesh and... KING GILGAMESH!!! THIS WAY--!!

KING GILGAMEEEEEESSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Falling into the underworld after that abrupt parting... Eresh gives us her powers to be able to deal in the underworld. Looks like Eresh’s security system at intruder is causing great pain to Tiamat thanks to Ishtar forcing her down inside

To fight on for King Gilgamesh... Eresh began her attack against Tiamat... Wait this blackness... THE CHAOS TIDE IS RETURNING BUT EVEN STRONGER THAN BEFORE?!!

Because of that fall... Beast II finally turns to her true form...! And Jaguar Warrior! So she turned out fine but... It’s now or never to defeat her-- Flowers... This voice, this voice of a fucking horny wizard... MERLIN!!!

So... Merlin you’re still alive? Tiamat didn’t kill you at all? You broke out of your prison for once to help us?! Okay forget happy reunion, seems like Merlin brought... Wait we brought him to repay his gratitude? But who--?!

That old man Ziusu-dra! No... KING HASSAN!!! With his NP... At the price of sacrificing his Grand title... Hassan granted death onto Tiamat! We can kill her now! As expected of Da Vinci-chan! Since we damaged her brain but recovered... Everything is to face her in the face!

With Merlin’s return... The buff is something against that fucking disgusting Chaos Tide. But still hurt a like bitch when they crit!

One wave down, next wave towards her head! Direct offsprings with class of Beast, King Hassan given us the temporary contract... Time for insta-kill on those things!!

I retried this because RNG luck and irritating taunt from the Lahmus are pissing me off :/

8 insta-death later, we’re finally at the head! As Romani said, time is running out with Tiamat reaching the surface soon in 300m.... Time for the first round against her!!

I’m frankly wondering if double Mash setup works here... Because this isn’t Gorgon with Chaos Tide bleeding the Servant’s life.. And additional curse buff that will outheal Merlin’s buff

Since NPC Merlin is here... Might as well have Ozzy being buff by him in Hero’s creation to kill her quickly... Considering he and Xuangzang are my current ST Buster NP

Oh come on! How the hell is Tiamat still standing?! Merlin you idiot, now you got kicked out by her! And... This..... No way..... KING GILGAMESH?!!!?!?! He’s back but in his Archer class?!

With Gilgamesh’s arrival... TIME TO FINISH THIS ONCE AND FOR ALL!

Okay, trying on double Mash.. Which is again hilarious because it worked for a while... Yeah until she removes them, so it’s a bit headache with her, along with the curse buff that stack

Ozzy and Herc-chan are main DPS with the former trying to dish out as damage as possible against her before the latter kicks in.

Martha for the buff and debuff remover... MVP actually since it’s ashamed I can’t rushed her skills finished to deal for Tiamat. But definitely helped a lot in dealing with her annoying debuffs

At last dealing a critical damage, Beast II finally destroyed! The grail from her finally retrieved at last!

Section 22

The final chapter arrived with us returning back to the surface. Singularity is repairing itself once Tiamat is gone. The grail in our hands thanks to Merlin getting his ass back to our side! And... Nope, we’re not helping you. It’s your fault in destroying Quetz’s divinity, Merlin!

Oh right, Quetz came back but how?! Ah, seems like Jaguar Warrior saved her! Oh... Guess Quetz and Jaguar Warrior are heading back to the Throne of Heroes first

Ishtar is alright too and looks like she’s staying in Uruk for a long while, hence her limited summoning. Eresh... For helping to destroy Tiamat... She’s fading... And disappeared.... Or to rest from what Ishtar said...

GILGAMESH!? YOU TURNED BACK TO YOUR NORMAL STUPID CASTER SELF! WAIT YOU’RE... He’s going off too?! And... For a souvenier... That’s why we got 2 Holy Grails this time! Along with food! Leaving to the Throne of Heroes to be summoned... He will spook again one way or another.

And we’re heading back to our own ways as we departed with bidding good bye to Merlin! So Merlin is a big fan of ours huh... I’m sure we’ll meet everyone again!

At home at last, WHAT?! Chaldeas turned red again?! Seems like King Solomon is giving an invitation to us to end things once and for all! To be continued until Solomon Singularity!

I’ll apologize for the observations since majority is already done up under the JP side. So I’m doing the ones which are the notable main bosses for this fight

Observations:

Quetzalcoatl:

The impossible: If you have two Herc-chan with you (one of them being borrowed), just bring more taunters and healers

The only possible option: To deal with her effectively only option is the Berserker class which is Lancelot and Herc-chan, but preferred the latter. Summer Servants worked but again, it depends on your preference. The only thing with those above as your main DPS, you’ll seriously want to have taunters especially you don’t know who her NP will hit. Also Herc-chan wise, at this point find the one with his Bond CE in ever the case he got killed repeatedly. Or other wise, just make sure he’s alive long enough to kill Quetz

Ereshkigal:

............. I learned my lesson in this fight a little. Never try to rely too much on your NP to deal with her

Anyway... If you’re having FFF rank luck for this fight, not being able to use NP through the whole fight. Have her to be crit rill death by your Sabers

Bring Servants who generates a good amount stars, Main DPS Saber that absorb good amount stars and crit hard, support that helps buffing damage/crit damage to kill her

Or otherwise, bring a debuff remover if you’d like to be able to use both NP and skill

Gorgon:

Laser shooting fest is amusing with double Mash + main DPS ST NP Servant

Any main DPS will do depend if you want to hit hard, get more stars to crit or to be able to spam more NP often.

I went with the last to be compatible for Mash to spam her NP often. So if you want double Mash way or there... Bring a good arts team like Robin, Medea, Chloe, George (unless you’re going for Sieg-George combo)

Otherwise, any team will do. Only problem is her stun debuff on your Servant when it happens, so it delays one turn to boost that said Servant NP or use their skills/NP

Another to watch out is her curse debuff after using her NP. I went with double Mash, and time is really ticking on me because the curse she dealt is really killing their HP each turn

Trait dealing there’s Scathach, Karna & Arjuna (for divine), Jack & Carmilla (for female) and the infamous King of Heroes

CEs not much of a comment but if you want to be not stun and curse... Debuff immunity CE?

Otherwise, CE that boosts damage should do

Kingu:

Your RNG luck comes into play a little but not as bad as Eresh, you’ll never know when he’s going to charge his NP full on the same or next turn

DEFINITELY DON’T BRING DIVINE SERVANTS AS THIS IS ENKIDU AND THEIR NP COMING AFTER THEM

Once again, taunters are needed if you don’t him to fire his NP at your main DPS/support

Trait wise... Nightingale as Enkidu’s body is still humanoid and at your own risk, AUO himself... Definitely don’t take the latter

I haven’t see it work but if Zouken’s CE in sealing his NP will helped delayed from it firing. But I’m not sure if it works because his permanent buff in charging NP randomly is there

Invincibility more recommended instead of evasion since he has a skill that removes evasion buff

Anything else, bring a good ST NP Servant for DPS and support with taunters/healers... Or even stallers to keep him at bay. But for stalling team, Gorgon Sister combo definitely don’t work.

Ushiwakamaru clones:

I’ll touch more on the ones which she’s neutral damage to all. Her Berserker-class version bring good AOE NP Servant will do

Considering her sole gimmick is to create copies of herself... Kill the original before more are being created

For this bring AOE NP... One fitting Servant for biggest damage by far again, AUO. Weak to Enuma Elish regardless corrupted or not

Or otherwise, bring your best AOE NP Servant...

With a really good healer in particular, because Chaos Tide against that class will kill you faster than you know it

Taunters for avoiding ST NP from her onto your main DPS Servant

Tiamat:

Martha my fucking saint saves my ass in most of these fight!

Practically debuffing her and removing those debuff from Tiamat is vital because she just keep stacking that curse debuff

There’s also her stun and NP seal that’s targeted onto Man-trait & Star-Attribute Servants... That kind of explained why Jeanne gets NP seal most of the time OTL

Double Mash works somewhat when she doesn’t remove your buffs and stack those fucking curse

Considering her laser and chaos tide charge your NP quickly.. It’s not that difficult to do spamming when needed

Skill seal definitely vital with Servant like David’s NP to stop Tiamat from buffing herself

Debuff immunity needed for the above debuff or even her NP when she buff block debuff on your whole front-line team

If you don’t have Angra Mainyu with his Bond CE in your friend list to deal bigger damage, balance between 3 DPS and 3 supports? Or at least estimated the amount of damage 1 main DPS Servant does before dying out.

Now that this is over... While grinding for SQs... Time for 3 to 4 days break from NA before the biggest hell right before Christmas!

[hellyeahrpmemes]

※ SHIT I HEARD AT COLLEGE ※

a thrilling saga of shit i’ve heard at college; these are all from my first semester of sophomore year. feel free to change names/pronouns/etc.! more ‘shit i heard/said’ starters!

“The porn industry is moving swimmingly.”

“We all need men. Go find them.”

“It’s not an opera, bitches, it’s a flight.”

“Don’t look! It makes their dick bigger!”

“I have my own place and I can light as many candles as I want.”

“I’m not a librarian, sir.”

“How’s your sack lunch, bitch?”

“Stab me in the ass and turn me into Kim Kardashian.”

“I stayed up another hour just to cry.”

“I just got a nude and I don’t know how to feel about it.”

“I’m gonna go stab my eyes out now.”

“We get it. You have a big truck and a small penis.”

“It’s an epidemic, Karter!”

“There’s no cups, so I’m using a bowl. To drink apple juice.”

“Fuck y’all, I’m eating Fruit Loops!”

“I don’t know my superhero name, but here I am with my can of Lysol and my plastic fork.”

“Your list of things to do includes making the best 2000s playlist of all time and fighting me at Cheesecake Factory.”

“This is borderline human abuse.”

“How do you feel about fluorescent lighting?”

“I’m sorry, I’m on a college budget, I’ll give you two nickels and a paper clip.”

“We couldn’t say hell, because… Catholic school problems.”

“I don’t want them to call me and be like, ‘we’re about to drill into your face!’”

“Ugh, yes, the hot TA, what club are you in?”

“My rat bastard dad? What about him?”

“I have an idea that I’m positive no other human has ever had: butter flavored ice cream.”

“I hate myself, but I’m funny, so…”

“This man loves puppies and he is not afraid to say it.”

“There’s just something about stale food that I really like.”

“I like how we’re watching our upcoming death on TV.”

“When I get wasted, I want to fight. It’s a problem.”

“My boyfriend got really drunk and started drinking nectar out of the hummingbird feeder.”

“He currently has a child.”

“That’s a good way of getting rid of a baby.”

“He can’t look at his dead parents or his alive children.”

“I can’t focus on reading, ‘cause I just wanna watch Drake and Josh.”

“My roommate loves manifestos. Especially the Communist Manifesto.”

“Have you studied his naked body or something?”

“Okay, we got our Greek tragic playwrights: there’s Sophocles… there’s Euripides… uh… Isosceles?”

“We’re so stupid we click things that say ‘click here for here’.”

“So there were just 95 loose pigs.”

“This is called shaming.”

“I can’t be the only person who says ‘meatballs and spaghetti’.”

“What could go wrong? …oh, shit, I’m on fire.”

“Don’t call Kourtney unless you wanna suck dick tonight.”

“There’s no one around. He’s talking to his dick.”

“Just ‘cause it’s Greek doesn’t mean it’s sophisticated.”

“I hate myself, but I hate her more.”

“I don’t know anything about it, but it has bread in the name, so I want to try it.”

“Just… don’t breathe this class.”

“Megan: secret crop top wearer.”

“I’m embracing my aesthetic while you’re embracing… Jon Hamm’s face.”

“What are we doing tonight besides homework? …and bread?”

“I’m witnessing a breakup right here in the Starbucks line.”

“I nominate Gushers as a snack suggestion, but, like, a lot of them. All of them.”

“I have a strong immune system.”

“I was so worked up about the bolo ties.”

“Also, I was wine drunk, so…”

“Does she hit him? I hope she hits him.”

“Only Matthew McConaughey drives Lincolns.”

“Oh, yeah, I’m totally a Republican… Pence is daddy…”

“After that… is the exact same thing… from a different angle.”

“All my life, I’ve been striving to be better than Kidz Bop.”

“Is ‘slaveitude’ a word?”

“Ted Bundy was attractive. People knew him.”

“I feel like whoever’s in charge of the Reese’s company is really high right now. Like, putting Reese’s inside of Reese’s.”

“One beer bottle on campus might be a problem, but if there’s 8, they’re props.”

“With elevators, it’s not claustrophobia. It’s that I don’t trust the government.”

“Headphones: in. World: out. Notes font: ugly.”

“You know that’s a felony, right?”

“That’s a… fourth or fifth impression kind of story.”

“That means she definitely fucked a member of Kiss.”

“I feel free, but also ugly.”

“This is my unassigned assigned seat, and if any of you take it, I will fight you.”

“I went to the Home Depot, bought a bunch of lights, put them up in the air, and said ‘this is art’.”

“Because I was a full New Yorker, I just kept walking.”

“We almost died, but our last meal would’ve been free, so…”

“What’s a funeral like in 2017? GIFs and memes.”

“I would like to thank not only God but also Tinder.”

“I sat through a 40 minute argument about how Justin Bieber started the Cold War.”

“I’m just walking down the hallway, thinking about ways to throw myself down the stairs and make it look like an accident.”

“Now, if it was Kidz Bop, I’d go see it.”

“Don’t name your kid Ethelwold.”

“Shoulders, chest, pants, shoes: a vision for America.”

“My dad’s not getting dick from anyone.”

“I’m a shady beach and y’all are my shady beaches.”

“Oh, no, don’t write that down…”

“At Chipotle, God himself picked those avocados and put them in the guacamole.”

“It should be a holiday: Ohio awareness day.”

“We should go to a nice place. A formal place. California Pizza Kitchen.”

“What do you do in geology lab? Dissect rocks?”

“What great weather for a mental breakdown.”

“He’s not computer generated; he’s actually that large.”

“I’ve done some soul searching and I think that ranch dressing is my favorite food.”

“I almost said his birthday was in 1926. It’s like, we got a little bit of an age gap.”

“Are you physically running away from the situation?”

“I will personally call Papa John to tell him that he’s the reason my life isn’t going right.”

“I can’t wait for middle-aged sex now.”

“I should’ve known, there aren’t two eclipses in a year!”

“I walked around with a bear taser for a year and a half.”

“I found out that the guy I have a restraining order against has been peeing on my car for two years.”

“He fought the devil in jeans and no shirt.”

“She threw my fucking pillow off of the balcony!”

“Tickets are for something fun. Paying the check is not fun.”

“It’s Halloween, calories don’t count on holidays.”

“Well, you know how I said we met in philosophy class? Well… Elise doesn’t take philosophy class.”

“You got it wrong. You said 56 point 2. The answer was 56 point 2.”

“Do I want that horrible sock tan line that I had for five years back? Yeah, I do.”

“I got drunk, threw up, got high, and came here.”

“It’s Titanic blue. I’m the Heart of the Ocean, bitch.”

“The only rat bastard in our lives is Russ.”

“The beats are so good, but the words are such trash.”

“I had to fight someone in the elevator yesterday.

“…I’ve awakened the Demigorgon.”

“We solved the great hiccup epidemic of 2017.”

“Watch out, Kansas, I’m coming for you.”

“Do not associate my birthday with math terms.”

“That’s some Hunger Games type shit.”

“Fuck y’all, I hope you trip and die.”

“I’m very confused and also cold: an American tale. A five part miniseries, this fall on HBO.”

“I am Mrs. Grey! Bring me the kink!”

“I really wanna make a shirt that’s all Comic Sans.”

“I was thinking about Panera’s mac and cheese in a bread bowl, and I started crying.”

“We’re gonna steal your WiFi, but it’s okay, because Panhellenic love.”

“I have confidence that you’re not gonna get pregnant within those two hours.”

“See if this card works. I mean, it should work, but, like…”

“I think my favorite part was slowly dying.”

“All they serve is chicken salad, so you really have to like chicken salad.”

“I have three papers and a test this week, I don’t have time for feelings to resurface.”

“I’m living a life. Not my best one.”

“When you write a report on a book you’ve never read.”

“Don’t tell me what to wear when you wear Crocs to the bar.”

“I have listened to literally nothing but Hallelujah and My Heart Will Go On all day today.”

“Oh my god, Elise, you fucking bitch, get your shit together, and write your paper.”

You know what I’m really devastated about? I’m all out of Fruit Roll-ups.”

“We’re gonna be teachers. We have school forever.”

“I don’t want your sympathy, I want your anger.”

“Clowns… doorknobs… the color yellow… ducks… I’m quoting Victorious…”

“Did you just say ‘hey Sophie’ to not include me? ‘Cause, guess what, bitch, I’m still here.”

“I live here, I know when we have salad!”

“I think Satan’s middle name is cumulative.”

“I will put up with my moose husband for however long I need.”

“I’ve literally been down here for an hour and a half waiting for these nonexistent cookies.”

“I’m keeping a detailed list of Elise’s hickeys.”

“I’m an adult, I say as I eat my Fruit Roll-up.”

“Oh, my practicum grade is in! Let’s see… 36.”

“SOS, I’m in bed and it’s so comfy, but I need to get up to study, what do I do?”

“Get up. Only a few more days until we can sleep all we want.”

“So you’re admitting you live in the woods.”

“I don’t know if it’s finals stress or if this is actually the cutest thing I’ve ever seen, but I’m crying.”

“It was optional, don’t make me feel bad for skipping class.”

“I’ve heard that, if enough people fail, they’ll have to curve it.”

“How do you even study for this?”

[sassy-mamasuras]

OH THE DRAMA!

Boy oh boy. So most of the stuff Karen and Shauna do I just bitch about and move on. Isn’t that what most of us do anyway? Well let me tell you right now, I was HOT the other night. So Thursday Austin and Lila decided to come for a visit. It has been a hot minute since the last time they’d come and I was super excited to see them. Everyone here adores them...or so I thought.  We are having a great evening just hanging out. So much tea is exchanged between us all. It is fantastic. Well fast forward to me going to pick up Fabio from work and Austin and Lila so graciously offer to watch the Little Raptor. I let them and while I was gone [40 mins total give or take] Shauna and Karen must have come home. Lila proceeds to tell me, after Karen leaves for work, that this woman had the AUDACITY to tell my brother and his girlfriend that I need to start taking my child out places or she won’t have an immune system. Like we are not STILL IN A WHOLE ASS PANDEMIC! What makes it even worse is that Karen is a fucking NURSE!? But I guess that taking the Little Raptor outside and to the park, letting her lick everything, isn’t enough to build up her immune system right? Perhaps it wouldn’t have been so bad if Karen had the balls to say this stuff to my face but she doesn’t. I guess she thought by telling my family that they would say something to me which would change my mind on the matter? Sorry babe but still my kid so I decide when I want to take her into crowded packed places, not you!  THEN....yes there is even more to this glorious night... So we are all sitting in the living room having a nice time talking and such when Fabio gets a text from Karen. This text goes on to ask us to be quite because Shauna is trying to sleep since she has to be up at 5am. Keep in mind that Karen is at work at this point in time and Shauna is right upstairs. So you mean to tell me that she texted her mommy to tell us to be quite instead of just texting her brother directly? Like she does literally ANY other time she needs something? Okay I guess. Well we quite down a bit and then Fabio goes upstairs since he wasn’t feeling the best. Little Raptor proceeds to have a full blown meltdown and if you have a child you know that it takes a minute to calm down toddlers in meltdowns. Right after she stops her wailing Shauna comes down stairs with a bag, doesn’t say a single word to any of us, grabs her keys and leaves. Great manners, right?  Now I know some of you might say that it was fine for her to be made since she had to be up at 5am for work. Normally I would agree if it were not for the fact that she’s stayed up well after midnight with us before knowing she needed to be up early for work. Not only that but the next day she needed to be up at 5am for work as well but that didn’t stop her from going out and staying out till after midnight. Is it my business what she does with her time? No, no it isn’t but what is my business is her being fucking RUDE with my family here over her needing to be up early when the very next day she can be out till the ass crack of dawn but need to be up early as well.  GRRR.  Before I get any bad comments. I’m allowed to rant. I’m allowed to be mad. So go for it, you’ll probably made a guest appearance in the next post lol.  Have a great day all you sassy people! 

[biayahlife]

Becky and the No Good Terrible Tabs

I have a lot on my mind lately. As much as I’d wished 2021 was better than 2020, so far it has not proved to be so. In my last therapy appointment I’d mentioned right off the bat that I felt like I had 185 tabs open in my brain and at any given moment I wasn’t sure which one needed my attention and as such, I didn’t know what I could close or which ones I should prioritize. 185 tabs is too many. It’s overwhelming and exhausting. It causes executive dysfunction to the worst degree. My therapist suggested a simple exercise: write out every single tab so I can see them in one place and maybe set them down for a minute instead of carrying them constantly.

I spent some time writing down all my “tabs”; these tabs ranged anywhere from “I am constantly worried about Cinnamon” to “WORK” to “I fucking miss my friends.” I counted the lines after I felt that I was done: 120 tabs. That’s more and less than I expected. A bit overwhelming even once laid out given that it is 120, however putting them on paper felt akin to actually setting them down and reducing the heavy load on my brain. With them laid out in a visual manner I have been able to spend some time thinking about what I can do to alleviate my concerns and which solutions would be best to prioritize first.

I decided to start with “I fucking miss my friends.” There are clear steps that I can take to make sure I can see my friends again and start operating in a pre-pandemic social fashion. 

Work on getting a covid vaccine

Schedule time with Miayah and her boyfriend

These two are in the bubble (Miayah obviously lives with me) and they’re my closest friends so it makes sense to schedule actual activities together to make the most of our hang outs. 

Reach out to my friends that I haven’t seen in a while and make sure they know I’m still thinking about them and that my love for them hasn’t dissipated with the time apart. 

I’ve been really bad about reaching out to my circle of friends and have become increasingly isolated as the months have dragged on. 

This doesn’t mean that I’d see all of them as that wouldn’t be safe - I could text and call and Zoom various people to let them know that they’re on my mind and that when everyone in the circle is vaccinated then we can get together again.

And so I started taking actionable steps to address this “tab” this week. I scheduled my first Moderna vaccination with the City of Austin, spent 90 minutes in line at the activity center, and got a shot in the arm. This is the first, most important, most significant step that I can take to make sure that I don’t continue to be so isolated. I know that the covid vaccines are a bit controversial and that not everyone is confident in their safety or necessity but for me and especially for Miayah they’re essential. They’ve been cleared for emergency use, there are multiple variations that have been tested by multiple agencies, and the side effects are minimal if anything at all.

I’m terrified of long haul covid. I don’t think with my immune system being as strong as it is that I would end up being hospitalized (I mean we really don’t know though) but there have been perfectly healthy people that end up with significant complications lasting months and months and months with no end in sight and that scares me so much. I’m also scared of Miayah being hospitalized. At my previous job there was a particular employee that would show up sick constantly. He was a great dude but was one of those people that said “oh I’ll power through it, I’m not that sick, I don’t want to miss work, I’ll just stay in my office and not infect anyone.” Inevitably he would leave his office and infect people. I know for a fact that sometimes I would bring things home and Miayah would get sick (even if I didn’t) and she’d be down for weeks. There was a time that I got sick for about 3 days and Miayah caught the cold and she was down for almost a month solid. If she got covid we don’t know what would happen and it’s too much of a risk to try and see a lot of people without her vaccinated.

My next step was to schedule time with Miayah and her boyfriend (who is really my friend too). Side note, I met her boyfriend first on a dating app and we went on a couple dates. He’s a wonderful, funny man and I’m glad we met. Miayah saw his profile on another dating site and decided, since I wasn’t particularly attracted to him, to go on a date with him. They hit it off and started dating and it’s been peachy ever since. We’ve discussed the fact that even if they break up at some point that we’re keeping him as a friend because he’s too cool to let go. He gets no choice XD. As you’ve probably seen in other posts, Miayah and I have been sorting out the backyard and since we have furniture now the three of us have been hanging out together in the nice weather we’ve been having. Additionally we’ll watch movies together, have light cocktails together, and bitch about work. We even made pawprint paintings with the dogs one night; Miayah’s boyfriend was kind enough to take photos. These moments together have been refreshing and oh so needed. I’m glad I have multiple people in my bubble and that I don’t live alone. That would be unbearable.

Third, I started reaching out to friends that I haven’t talked to in a while. I sent messages to a throuple that Miayah and I met years ago that we absolutely adore, our friends that have 4 kids together (our godkids!), and a couple other people in my social circles that I would consider close. I let them know that I love them dearly, that they’re still on my mind, and that I look forward to seeing them again soon. We set up a Zoom call with some of them and had tea together for an hour or so. There was fancy tea in lovely buddha glasses we found at Big Lots of all places; much laughter happened with the purchase of these molded glasses. We reminisced about old parties we have thrown and attended in the past and rekindled our desires to party again.

As I’m sure we’ve mentioned, Miayah and I love to throw parties, especially in fourth quarter. We have a Halloween party (the biggest of the year!), a Black Friday party, and a Christmas pajama party and cookie exchange. We throw tea parties in the beginning of the year, sometimes throw a birthday party or two, and do dinner parties all the time. Speaking with my friends again, that I have isolated from, was a good way to remind everyone that in the future, with more people vaccinated, that we can gather like that again and have a celebration of life. Even when things are difficult the parties, large and small, really bolster my spirit and I’m sure that’s the same for many people in our lives.

Ultimately these steps addressing the singular tab in my brain have been worth it and a good suggestion from my therapist. I know I have 119 tabs left but since this one, “I fucking miss my friends,” has been looked at, turned over, and addressed, the 119 don’t feel so heavy. I know that slowly with social support things are going to become less of a burden and I won’t feel so lonely. Many of these tabs would still be issues with or without the pandemic but this way with outside support I’ll feel like I can address them all.

How do you reach out for support when you have lots of things on your plate?

[echelonlab-blog]

Reigning Madness – Chapter 77

Masterlist

Disclaimer: Fiction.

Warnings: None

Tagging: @hazeleyedleto @msroxyblog @letojokerownsme @miss-shannanigans @snewsome756   @maliciousalishious   @nikkitasevoli@meghan12151977 @mindlessselfindulgence88 @sanellv@ambolton@jayded-reality @bradlea23@spillinginkwithlove@alexis7215@dezmarz@pezziecoyote@whoistheprettiest@avaj99@iridescxntsolitude@pheenixpeterson@guccilowell@blondiefrommars @rowen1976​

     Cynnamon’s POV

From the day JJ came home from the hospital things had been insane. I didn’t know what to do with him since he had these annoying wires from the heart monitor dangling from his tiny body. Eventually, I quit putting it on him. He didn’t need it, since I hadn’t heard it beep in weeks. I wanted to hold him and take him out to show him off, but unfortunately, the doctor insisted that I keep him home.

   They say that his little immune system wasn’t capable of fighting off illness like a full term baby, but I didn’t know if I believed it. The first few weeks I dedicated myself to trying to be a good mom, staying home to care for my son, but it was starting to wear on me. I finally took him shopping with me and I loved the attention it got me. People were constantly stopping me to tell me how adorable he was. I felt like the center of attention and I loved it. He was a beautiful baby even though he wasn’t Jared’s. I then started taking him out more and more, but even that got old.

The nice little old lady three apartments down had been keeping JJ while I worked a few hours a day. I worried because she was old, but i had to work so I accepted it.

I missed all of the extra appointments, the one for his eyes and ears. I knew he could hear since any little noise made him scream at the top of his lungs. I only had so much time and didn’t feel like wasting it on stupid appointments.

JJ’s screaming for hours on end for no reason at all, was making me crazy. I don’t get it, his diaper was changed, he was fed, and it was silent! So why wouldn’t he shut up and sleep? I’m lucky if he was out for four hours at a time.

 The crib was right next to my bed and it seemed that he sensed when I dozed off and that’s when he would let out that ear piercing cry! I needed some sleep, but even more so, I needed a night out. I knew that Jason would want some time with his son, but there was no way I would allow him to babysit since he’d no doubt have that disgusting bitch around my son. That just wasn’t an option.

 The nice lady I met at the grocery store told me that her sixteen-year-old daughter could babysit. Her name was Christina and she had been babysitting since she was thirteen. I sat on the couch ready to rip the hair out of my head and flipping over the folded up piece of paper with Christina’s name on it as JJ spit up all over his new outfit.

 “Oh JJ you’re a mess,” I said with a giggle, seeing Rylee’s name light up my screen. I leaned all the way back on the couch, using my foot to slowly rock his car seat as I angrily listened to her tell me about Jared’s sneaking off to Vegas to marry that little mousy loser. This wasn’t over and I could feel the rage building even after we disconnected.

I called Christina and asked her to babysit. She said she could be over by nine and I carried the car seat with me into the bedroom. JJ screamed the entire time I got ready to go out, crying endlessly to be picked up, but I didn’t have time. He had gotten quite spoiled, wanting to be held all the time, but I needed a break.

 Christina showed up on time and I was out the door and on my way to meet Vivian. I didn’t expect to get that drunk or stay out until three, but I did. When I stumbled through the door with the hottie that couldn’t seem to keep his hands off of me all night, I paid Christina. After she left I was bent over the back of the couch and fucked very roughly. He choked and squeezed my flesh so hard that I knew there would be bruises the next day. Unfortunately, once it was over, JJ began to cry and Derek wasn’t sticking around.

 The next day I was getting ready to go out when my phone rang. I was shocked to see Rylee’s name after she insisted she was done.

[catlady1986]

THE BEST SMELL IN THE WORLD IS THAT OF THE ONE YOU LOVE.

Chapters: 1/9  Fandom: Final Fantasy XV  Rating: Teen And Up Audiences  Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings  Relationships: Gladiolus Amicitia/? Characters: Gladiolus Amicitia,  Noctis Lucis Caelum, Prompto Argentum, Ignis Scientia, background characters, others to appear later  Additional Tags: ABO, Soulmates, Language, Blood, Depression, Angst Summary: Gladio has suffered from allergies ever since he was a child, eventually losing his sense of smell. That wouldn’t be an issue, except for the fact that Alpha’s find their soulmates by scent. So now Gladio has to navigate through life, watching his friends and loved ones finding and spending time with their soulmates while he is left alone, trying to fight back depression.  

Next

Ever since he was a child, Gladio has suffered from terrible allergies. It didn’t even matter the time of year, he’d either acquire a constant stuffy nose that made him sound funny according to the prince or on the worst end a sinus infection with it getting so bad once he was hospitalized. He just trucked through it and took whatever medicine was prescribed to him, them helping for a while until he became immune and wound up stuffy or with constant nose bleeds.

But then things took a turn for the worse.

“Is there any way to fix him?” his mother asks the pediatrician, her voice sounding strained, as though as she’s trying to fight back tears.

“I’m afraid not, his olfactory system has been severely damaged and surgery won’t do anything for him. I’m sorry.”

At that time, he didn’t understand why it was such a big deal for him not to be able to smell things, especially after having gotten a whiff of the diaper pail in his baby sister’s room. But in a world where you have a predestined soulmate that, if born an Alpha, you can find by their scent, not having that capability would hinder you finding them. And since the gods seem to find his misery amusing, at age twelve he presented as an Alpha.

“I don’t understand why having a dumb soulmate is so important.”

“Gladio,” his father says with a sigh and crouches down before his son. “having a soulmate is very important. It’s a person who was made special just for you as you were for them. They fill your life with so much love and joy, you feel satisfied and whole when they are with you. They are your better half and you are theirs.”

“That makes no sense.”

Clarus chuckles and pats his son’s shoulder. “You are still young Gladiolus, when you get older you will understand.”

“But I can still fall in love with someone and be with them even if we’re not soulmates, one of the kids in my class has parents that aren’t soulmates.”

“You speak of the Tamerlane boy?” he asks and gets a nod, face growing morose. “Gladiolus, his parents never married and split up not long after being together since his mother found her soulmate. They just do well in co-parenting and don’t speak openly about their home life. And you shouldn’t either.”

Gladio huffs in annoyance but just lets it go for the time being. There has to be others who are in relationships with non-soulmates that have stayed together and if not then Gladio vows to be the first. However, this will prove to be nearly impossible for him, with any boy or girl he attempts to court dumping him eventually once they find ‘the one’, as has just happened to the gloomy sixteen-year-old.

“Dammit.” he grunts out as he looks at his now ex-girlfriend’s social media posting, showing her in the arms of another, them lipped locked with the caption ‘SOULMATES’ written in pink sparkles.

He goes to pocket the device but stops to let out a large sneeze that gives a very nosey prince an opening to snatch the phone.

“Hey you little shit, give it back.” Gladio snaps before sneezing again.

Noctis keeps out a reach until he gets a good look at the screen, him stopping and staring dejectedly at the phone, brows furrowing. “Aw Gladio, I’m sorry.” he says and hands the phone back. “But if she didn’t even have the decency to end it with you in person, then she’s a bitch and doesn’t deserve my awesome bro.” Noct tells him, giving him a playful punch to the shoulder and caring smile.

“Yeah, thanks.” Gladio says and snuffles a bit, feeling his nose beginning to run. Fucking allergies.

“Gladio your nose is bleeding.”

The teen wipes his nose with his sleeve, seeing bloody mucus smeared all across. “Ah shit. Training’s on hold, go take fifteen while I deal with this.”

Noctis gives his shield a worried look but nods and pats his shoulder. Gladio lets out a deep sigh and heads over to his duffle, taking out a medical pack he keeps with him for situations just like this. He cleans up what blood he can after pinching the bridge of his nose, keeping his head tipped forward and setting a timer for ten minutes. Once that is done, Gladio presses an ice pack to his face, helping to restrict the blood flow.

“Another nosebleed?”

Gladio glances up and sees Ignis, the man’s eyes looking with concern behind his frames.

“Yeah.”

“How many has it been?” he asks and sets down his own duffle bag to check on his friend.

“It’s the third one this week and yes, I told my doctor. She said due to it being windy and dry lately the pollen levels have increased. Just have to suffer through it and hope we get a few days of rain.”

“I can’t imagine how it must be to go day to day suffering like you do. I also couldn’t fathom what it would be like to not be able to smell, I rely on it with my cooking.” he says and smiles with a hint of amusement. “Also when a certain couple of young teens think they can sneak a cigarette or two behind my back.”

“Hmm, yeah.” Gladio says and looks back down at the floor, letting out a deep sigh.

“Noctis told me what happened.”

“Geez, hasn’t even been five minutes and probably everyone we’re acquainted with knows.”

“No, just me and Prompto.” Ignis says and looks at the message. “Your sister too, from what it shows for who he sent the group text to.”

“And that means my parents know if Iris was told. I don’t understand why everyone needs to make such a big fucking deal out of my love life. This soulmate bullshit is stupid.” Gladio harumphs.

“It’s not stupid Gladio, it’s an important part of our society that ensures two peoples’ eternal happiness. And in some folklore it guarantees that when both are reborn they’ll fall in love again and be forever fortunate, continuing the cycle.”

“Hmm, maybe I pissed someone off in a past life and they cursed me. Too bad other Alpha’s can’t discern each others’ soulmates, could ask you to sleuth around for me.” the older teen says and sighs.

“Well once I find mine, I can let you know what it’s like and maybe you can figure out other ways to find your mate. Could be how they look at you or the shift in tones when they speak. You have a good knack for reading people, even better than me I’ll admit. Who knows, maybe you’ll spot mine for me even before I do.”

“Can’t say I’ve seen anyone act like that around you, no offense or anything Iggy.”

“It’s all right, we may have yet to meet them.” he says as a light dusting of pink coats his cheeks. “Or maybe it’s because they haven’t presented yet and don’t have those inclinations and I can’t detect them yet.”

Gladio just shrugs his shoulders and sets the warming ice pack aside to pick up his phone. The teen watches and begins counting down the last few seconds until the timer goes off. He carefully stops pinching his nose and waits, finding that thankfully the blood has stopped.

“Well, time to drag princess back to the dance floor. Catch ya later Ignis.” he says and waves goodbye to his friend.

Gladio scours around and finds the teen lounging amongst the training equipment, playing a game while listening to music. He gets Noct’s attention with a poke of his shoe to the boy’s rear, startling him and chuckling.

“Oh, hey, you feel better now? You sure you don’t want to take the rest of the day off?”

“So you can slack off?” Gladio asks, raising an eyebrow.

Noctis puffs out his cheeks in anger. “I was actually going to ask Cor or Ignis to spar with me, big jerk.”

“Yeah, I know. You’ve been pretty good about that. But I just plan to skip my afternoon jog and go home to relax, possibly even go to bed early. Hmm?” He stops and looks down at the face shield being held out by the younger teen. “What’s this for?”

“So if I accidentally hit your face it won’t make your nose gush like a geyser.”

“Pssh, like you could even land a hit on me in the first place.” Gladio teases and gives him a nudge.

“Hey I’m just being cautious.”

“I know, thanks kid.” Gladio says and looks down at the face mask, smiling and putting it on, just in case.

But as he steps back into the training hall, he has another sneezing fit, blood splattering all over his hands and face making him look like he just got offed in a horror movie. Fucking allergies.

[ellaintrigue]

Roll the dice! A saying, of course, known from gambling, but also superstition. Superstition can be fun, if used harmlessly. This winter, after my mom was diagnosed with late stage cancer, I took comfort in anything that I could, including a silly novelty, a lucky rock. I throw it down each day for shits and gigs, and also use it to meditate. If I roll it or balance it between two fingers it works as a distraction against my anxiety.

But while rolling the dice is meaningless, we can use that saying for what life does... it rolls the dice on us. Everyone is different, and there are so many random occurrences, the planet is an endless enigma. We live, breed, and die.

But not all of us breed. A childless man may go somewhat unnoticed, but a childless woman is stigmatized heavily, and at random. It is society's way: even in a largely liberal word, instinct takes over. "The norm." I've been targeted randomly by trolls: https://ellaintrigue.tumblr.com/…/so-many-trolls-on-meetme-… I've been shamed in the dating scene, I've been regarded as a freak by my fellow women. One guy told me I would never be happy unless I gave birth because that is what women are supposed to do.

But I never wanted to. I decided that at 16, and came out about it at 22, telling my parents I never wanted children. They were hurt, but I can't sacrifice myself for others. And people have said, "but your parents sacrificed themselves for you." Yes, my parents have given me everything. They wanted to. And I would give them everything. But I do not want to sacrifice my health, sanity, and life for an unwanted child.

I have simply never wanted children, and now as my health issues further descend upon me it is unquestionable that physically having one would be unideal. But I rarely bring that factor up because my disinterest and emotional choice to not have a child in the reigning point here.

I could PROBABLY hold a pregnancy. It would probably be an underweight kid, and no doubt inherit some of my health issues, including mental, just like with my dad and grandmother. It would probably cry a lot from having fetal alcohol syndrome but I could put it in another part of the house, right? I really never liked babies so maybe it could spend most of the time with its grandparents. I could probably get mad welfare using it and work less. The father could even move with me and feed it and stuff because I have very little patience and get annoyed having pets at this point. I have a compromised immune and fucking hate shit, scooping litter is my limit. So the baby daddy could wipe its butt and stuff, comfort it, feed it, deal with it. I also hate the way babies smell, they have that weird smell to them. And their skin feels disgusting.

Society wants me to do that. Society wants women to conform and breed, whether they are fit for it or not, because women are still not regarded as equals. Yet society shits when a mother kills her child. Of course that's a sick woman. But maybe, we should raise young girls to be aware of all of their options: careers, college, and anything that strikes their interest. Not that women shouldn't stay home and have babies, but because not all women are meant to be mothers. People tell me the world would go extinct if people thought like me... but there is no shortage of people. People will always breed, and I am okay with that. But I don't want to. I don't want to harvest an alcohol baby with bad genes because society and pro-lifers tell me too.

I clicked The View off yesterday when it came on TV because I hate talk shows, but before I did, the woman on the screen pointed out that pro-lifers protest abortion but when unwanted children are born, they want funding and welfare stopped. That is so true. Someone said to me a lot of babies up for adoption are African American or have drugs in their system, etc. So, why don't all of these white conservative pro-lifers adopt them? I said that to someone and they got angry with me and called me racist.

No. We are all equal in the eyes of God. Black, white, male, female, etc. How am I being racist in thinking that a good stable pair of white pro-life Christian conservatives should adopt a black baby and give him/her a good life with opportunities?

I have said this theory to several conservative men and they absolutely lost their shit on me, but couldn't argue back with any real logic. I suppose I am a huge bitch but it all started when they said they were family-oriented and pro-life and I said why abortions are needed, and that existing kids should be adopted. One dude told me to fry in hell.

I have to confess something: I used to always say I didn't want kids because I hated them. Because people demanded to know why I didn't want kids, from bosses when I worked years in retail, to dating prospects, to random fucking family friends, and even store customers. Strangers in public have asked if I had kids and then asked why not. One woman said to me "when you have kids" and when I said "I don't want kids" she became completely offended.

So, as a defense mech, I snarled at people that I hated kids to get them off my back. And that is wrong, I don't hate anyone. But I was being victimized by breeder bullies that could not accept that a woman could be more than a childbirth machine.

Mom posted a blog the other day venting about everyone bragging about their grandchildren, in part because my cousin had another baby this week. Mom wanted grandkids and is sad she won't get them but it was a harmless rant that did not shame me in any way. And her friends replied, saying she simply didn't understand the joy. These coldhearted, close-minded seniors never considered my mother couldn't have grandkids. One of them posted, "Have to tell you guys, you don’t get it until it happens to you. There is something deeply fulfilling in seeing your Children’s children. It’s almost a form of immortality, if you will. My Granddaughter fills me with love and pride and my Grandson who died of cancer at age 10 months will forever be a part of me. Raising children is hard. Having Grandkids almost seems like a reward!"

The point of mom's blog was that simply breeding was not reason for celebration because anyone can do it, even animals. But of course her point was deeply lost in the comments of white rural conservatives, whose only accomplishment in life was, well, having a shitton of kids and grandkids. Laughable.

And you know, there is no plight here on my part. I am comfortable with my choice, and there is no jealousy or urge for children. As I mentioned before, I am very comfortable with my liberal cousins because they would never question my choices and respect all women. I was excited to see my distant cousin's new baby and her other little girl is fucking precious, she should be a model. Those cheeks, omg. Then my first cousin, who I talk to regularly has two well-raised kids I have not met yet but would like to. They are clearly smart and creative and I want to know all of my relatives! There is no hate in my heart for children, and no jealousy over any of the other families of those I know.

If only we could all just co-exist as individuals instead of deeply judging the personal reproductive choices of others. I largely overlook huge religious families and the like, many of which who do not believe in birth control. But when people try to normalize reproduction to the point where anyone without children is judged then that is where I speak up.

...And to think of all the women/couples that want children and cannot have them, and the cold disregard for them in all of this hysteria... that really lets you know that we are all just animals... fucking, breeding, and mindless to anything but ourselves...

[ts-hvv4]

EPISODE SIX: “HOW HAVE THESE PEOPLE NOT VOTED ME OUT YET DO THEY KNOW WHO I AM??” - SHARIFA

Well. Olivia was just voted out. NED and MALIK being real sneaky bitches. Though I guess I can’t complain too much considering that OLIVIA and I did try to blindside MALIK. I knew this wasn’t a good idea. I told her it was crazy. And now I’m on the bottom and probably next to go if we lose the immunity challenge. Of all the people to be stuck with now, this is not how I wanted the game to go.

Never has my opinion of someone changed so rapidly as seeing MALIK’s reactions to OLIVIA’s goodbye messages. The only thing I want to do in this game now is make sure MALIK does not win.

CHRIS told me that him, DENNIS and NED voted for OLIVIA. Which means MALIK and ANDREAS voted for me. All five of them need to leave this game ASAP. Tinky Winky for life. Currently trying to work my hardest at getting back in the good graces of CHRIS and DENNIS at the very least. I’m hoping I can work with them and dump MALIK next tribal if we go to it.

I really did like Keegan, and I was feeling guilty about trying to go for Olivia, and then they made it easier by targeting me LMAO so now I’m just whatever with him. Maybe we can talk about it if he comes to me but he got cold towards me since the plan to get me out started, so imma just keep my distance from him. Sucks though, I didn’t think he was a cool guy. But in better news: IM SO HAPPY SHE IS GONE!! She kept coming for me for god knows what. She was supposed to be my ally but kept trying to get me sent home and tried to say no hard feelings..girl no. I also heard from Ned that Jake was curious at Olivia leaving, so I feel like he doesn’t really care for my well being like I thought so at this point I’m starting to look at all of my previous allies sideways because they could all feel this way, mainly sharifa because she confided with me about how Olivia was one of the ones talking about me and olivias been trying to get me out but she wanted her to stay?? I’m sticking to teen titans for now and imma try to feel Kurt out if I ever get back to him because no ones said how he really feels.

Okay so i have grown such an immense bond with Sharifa, that’s obvious, but now jake too. It’s tricky because it’s hard to let someone else into our relationship however Sharifa and I play it in a way where we have jake believe that both of us are closer to him than we are to each other. Ideally he believes that he is a potential final 2 with both Sharifa or myself, if it comes down to that. In reality, as much as I’m growing to love my fellow f@g Jake, Sharifa is my ride our die. Final 3 on the other hand, it’s us 3 villain winners all the way.

So... after tribal Keegan came to me and was kind of salty about the whole thing ... which makes sense considering 2 hours before tribal Olivia called me and she wanted to vote Malik and I went with it and told her how I couldn’t wait to play with her. Obviously all lies but I had to do that. She ate it up which kind of sucked but whatever. Keegan expresses he wants to be a free agent but quite frankly I’d rather he just leave. Him being on this tribe has not helped me at all, he rarely speaks to me and it seems like he isn’t interested in working with me so .... I guess bye ??

Yall how did i not get sandra'd...HOW HAVE THESE PEOPLE NOT VOTED ME OUT YET DO THEY KNOW WHO I AM?????? Basically, Nicklas and friends wanted Kage out BAD and thought they could take the shot because I kept telling them how badly I wanted to vote out Trent. What they don’t know is I still have Trent on my side KNOWING that, because I told him I was getting the target on him SOOOO I could play the idol on him. I’m securing Trents loyalty because I’m dangling a treat over his head AFLKDSA. BASICALLY I BLEW UP HIS GAME TO THE OTHER SIDE AND HE’S SO GRATEFUL TO ME….IM A HORRIBLE PERSON. Who runs the world? Villains. But let’s be clear, Armonia Villians got fucking lucky. Nicklas steered the vote onto Kage because he’s a smart mother fucker truly. I’m hoping I can outwit them through my relationship with Trent and telling him about the idol. I know everyone would be scared to have so many people know about a idol, but i think that’s because most people look at idol’s for self preservation, when I think they’re better served as tools for longevity. Look at Yul, he never had to use his idol at tribal, because he used it to secure loyalty and instil fear, and that’s how I’m going to use this one.

So Olivia got voted out and I was really fearful of that happening...mostly I feel a lot of guilt because I'm partly to blame. I was the one who blew up her game to Ned, because I wanted him to trust me the most in the game, but that was before Olivia and I got close. So Ned’s been on a warpath out for her blood because he’s vengeful as fuck, and I kept placating him because she was becoming a closer ally to me. AND I TOLD HIM THAT. But one thing I’ve learned about Ned, is if he feels you crossed him, he will hunt you down and put your head on a spike for the whole village to see. The second I saw how the swap broke down, I knew the chances of Ned and Malik flipping on Olivia were HIGH, and I think that’s exactly what happened, especially because I know Ned played a game with Andreas before. With Olivia leaving, my game takes a huge hit (AND SO DOES NED’S BUT HE DOESN'T THINK LONG TERM). But my greatest skill in these games is my ability to adapt to whatever situation. So I went on a 2.5 hour call with Sarah and bonded with her...she’s fucking crackdt and I’m actually a stan KLFJA I LOVE HER. I’ll be honest I did it for game reasons, with Olivia voted out I lost a number and I need another one, but what was surprising is I didn’t realize Sarah could be an important person for my game?? She’s crazy don’t get me wrong KLFAD, but she’s very transparent and blunt, and I can use that. I had a gut feeling to tell her about my idol and I did, and she then revealed to me she had the swap idol. We formed an f2 called “The Idol Sisters” and swore each other to secrecy...I then IMMEDIATELY went and told Jake and Kurt adfkajs. I think I’ve done a good job of integrating myself into the Sarah/Matt/Nicklas faction, and I think that’s where I need to invest my energy right now. I know Sarah and Jake are close (closer than either one will admit) so I’m trying to get something set up with Jake/Sarah/Matt/Me. Kurt and I talked about leaving him out of it, so he can pursue something with Lukas. The difference between the games I’ve won, and the games I’ve lost, is knowing all the relevant information in the game. Having the relationships I have is going to give me access to the intel I need to make the moves that are best for MY game, but it’s a *Baylor voice* sticky situation because I’m weaving so many relationships over each other. I’m trying to implement a trust tier system so I can cover my basis; Kurt is at the top and knows everything, then Jake knows everything but my relationship with Kurt, then Trent knows everything but The Cock Destroyers (I CAN'T BELIEVE I LET THESE GAYS NAME OUR ALLIANCE THAT GODDDD IM HOMOPHOBIC NOW), and then Sarah, then Nicklas, then Matt and so on and so forth. And I'm securing all these loyalties by owning up to the fact that I'm a villain to people I don’t trust, but in the same breath touting the fact that I'm fiercely loyal, as seen by my final 2's with L'Shei and Jakey in Tonga and Generations. These people should know better than to trust me and I’m going to exploit the fuck out of it because I'M A VILLAIN HELLO. But it means at the merge I’m going to have to be very methodical about how I take people out, because any wire I cut can set the bomb off. This whole premerge has been about storing away the resources I’ll need to run the merge, so when I hit the merge beach...call me the grim reaper cause my scythe is hungry for blood and mother death needs to be fed. 

It's been a while since I've sent one of these and a ton has happened. I am still working super close with the OG Ammonia Villains. We share all idol searches and clues and I think we really do trust each other. When we lost the first immunity after swap it was chaos. I was the target for a long time, until people realized how sketchy Kage was acting. According to Sharifa, I was the target due to being super close with Olivia.  They figured I would flip to her if I got the chance, and wanted to take me out before it was too late. But Kage was being sketchy and throwing out names like crazy and leaking things to everyone, that people realized he was a much more dangerous wild card.  Sharifa is convincing the other villains (not including the OG Ammonia 4) that she does not like me and wants me out soon. This is to make sure they tell her when they are voting me, so we can have a plan. Olivia going actually helped me a ton though. I no longer have a "duo" or anyone i have a connection with so i am no longer dangerous. I can play a Natalie Anderson type game now where I pretend to be with everyone, and then take them out one by one. According to Sharifa again, who is basically my informant when it comes to Matt Summers, who will barely talk with me, he no longer wants me out. And wants to go into merge villain strong. Which I'm fine with for a bit. The good thing about this merge (if it's next) is I don't think I'm going to be a huge target. There are 4 former winners going into merge and i'm working with 3 of them. Which means i'm practically surrounded by shields. I'd be very surprised if anyone comes after little ole me this early on in the merge. Hopefully I can get close to some of these heroes and be like IDK why I'm a villain i dont fit in with these people, and work them socially to trust me. It'll be tough but I think it's possible. 

So I took immunity L pretty badly! I mean I get it was a given that we might lose but its just sucky. I can handle letting myself down but letting other people down is quite upsetting because I don't like to make other people unhappy.

I did tell Keegan everything about the vote so he didnt feel too left out but also so he is less likely to vote me and sure enough today he has a plan to target Dennis/Andreas supposedly. I want gain any traction but yeah. So at least I am safe!

I feel like I’m in a great spot! I have a lot of bridges built and a lot of insight on other people’s relationships. I’ll admit that a lot of these bridges aren’t super sturdy (as a result of my shitty response time to people messaging me), but if there was a vote tonight I think I’d be very well-connected. I’m in an alliance with Matt and Sarah which I totally love! They make me happy. That being said, there isn’t an ounce of me that would want Matt to go far into this game, so that alliance is nothing more than a pleasantry. I used Olivia’s boot (so sad) as a tool to get closer to Sharifa and Kurt. I love Kurt. Sharifa is going to be a major juror, so I want her to like me. As for other people- I see Trent as an outsider. I think he has a few scattered connections here and there but I’ve been throwing his name out a lot so people think I’m open to game talk. Nicklas is either super disconnected or weirdly confident in some secret bonds I don’t know about. Jake seems a little disconnected as well, but I think he could be here for awhile if he plays his cards right. In the event of a merge, I want to play it safe and really pound the same few names over and over to make my game appear one-dimensional (those names being Trent and Malik). I’ll try to stick to the villain tribe lines until they crumble, in which case I think I’ve positioned myself in a way where I won’t be a causality of that collapse. I’m having fun!

You know that feeling of “I’m Doomed” and there’s nothing you can do to change it? Yeah that’s me right now.

Jeopardy queen has entered the chat So we been getting lots of tea thanks to my girl Sharifa... First off I found out from her that Sarah has the idol that was on this tribe.  INCH RESTING. Then at thera ned tells me about the messy vote and tells me that he’s working with andreas and likes Sarah and then it hits me... in my last game with Sarah I was told that andreas is her best friend. So bitch. We keeping an eye out for that. But I think I’m better connected now than I was before... Sarah wants to work w me sharifa and kurt and I think it’s because she knows ned was working with us. I’m also really close with Nicklas but I worry if I disclose too much info to him and it gets out then I’m fucked LOL. But Sharifa wants to work with him too so I hope we can incorporate him in a group because I’m not trying to fuck him over in this game. We love how I already made too many connections and am gonna be a messy bitch. Alsoooo I won an exile safety thing from thera because I’m THAT bitch. let’s hope I keep on popping offff

Immunity STREAK baby. Fuck the heroes they can suck a rock and have fun voting Keegan out. Ned is kind of a crackhead since it looks like he went for Olivia the previous tribal. It’s concerning because it knocks down our original tribe numbers and I just hope they don’t actually send Keegan home. That weakens us entirely going into merge because it is a huge vulnerability for Hydra (Ned, Sharifa, Jake, and myself’s final 4) seeing as people could take advantage of that and begin pagonging us. If anything and ANYONE had to go from my original tribe please god could it be Malik? He’s gotten very clingy and I don’t want to have to deal with a leech anymore.

So I’m growing tighter and tighter with Lukas which is good because I think I genuinely have him believing I’m on the outs and he is my closest ally. I do really love him and will try to keep him in as long as I can, however when its time to cut him he’s got to go. I have a feeling he’d do the exact same thing to me.

Idk man. This is such a weird round. We lost (duh) and keegan is apparently not talking to anyone. So either something is up and I am not involved, or he has an Idol (which he hopefully won't use on me) OR he has given up?? Like what the heck is happening here. I want to believe in Chris and Andreas not turning on me. Ned has given everyone too much info from their side (he also might have their OG idol) and we literally just saved Malik. So.. Idk? stay tuned to see if the 14th curse stays with me, or if I will be able to break it...

I am WERKING to make sure I survive this tribal. DENNIS says he’s open. CHRIS says he’s open. NED is down since we have a thing going on. I’m trying to get ANDREAS involved. Again to hopefully vote out MALIK. Since that seems to be the safest option for the three OG MOLLY tribe members. Please god let this work.

This vote seems very... easy? I think everyone is tossing their votes on Keegan. I think we will some wonky stuff like 4-1-1 because someone will toss their vote on someone incase of an idol... and tbh i think it will be on me because I think people have enjoyed putting my name in their mouth lately. Anyways, Keegan is scrambling and has thrown out everyone's name left and right in order to stay. I am trying to find the fine line between not ignoring him but not leading him on, because that's just cruel TBH.

ANDREAS, DENNIS and CHRIS have all said they’re open and willing to voting MALIK over me. Whether or not they’re lying to me I can’t say for sure. However I do know that I’m putting in a hell of a lot of work to make this all happen. And honestly, I’ve never worked this hard in an ORG to try to flip the votes. I never realized before that it was even possible to go from being the unanimous vote off to possibly saving myself. I’m so glad I worked to make actual bonds with these guys during the swap. If I can pull this off, this might end up being an incredible move.

I am not a hero.

ANDREAS just told me that it’s going to be MALIK voted out tonight and if this is true I’ll actually start sobbing tears of joy. Thank god NICOLE decided to not have a tribal on call.

It's gotten weirdly quiet ... am i about to be blindsided? Stay tuned

[travellers-survivor-old-west]

Episode 4: “Just gotta try to wiggle myself in some where”- Austin

I kinda wish our tribe would lose just so I could see where the lines are tbh. Also I have a bad feeling that at a swap/merge our tribe is gonna be picked off because we’re going in with the most numbers and on a base level that’s dangerous; however, I do think it could be deeper than that because of the preconceived relationships and I’m looking forward to seeing who goes home tonight and where we go from here.

This round was a little wild for me. Austin has been my fave since the beginning and we finally created an alliance. We both liked eve so that was easy but we wanted one more person. This is where things got a little complicated. Him and eve both liked isaac but honestly i wasnt feeling isaac and love pat. But i didnt want to push too hard so we just went ahead with isaac. 

BUT we also talked to pat and will have ANOTHER alliance with him (so austin, pat and me). SO basically im working with everyone right now except keaton. Im glad our tribe has been killing it because that means no TC wooo 

We tribe swapped so that is fun. It's always interesting to have a switch up. I have still yet to be screwed by a tribe swap in my entire history of playing ORGs which is something I am happy with. This is one of the best iterations of a tribe I can think of actually. I can forge a closer bond with Xander and Dylan, because now if we lose I won't need to vote one of them out, they become my core 3. So, right after the swap I made an OG Malakoff chat with myself, Xander, and Dylan. I just wanted the immediacy to show that I was serious in wanting to stick to that, which I am. I have communicated several times that I want to work with Isaac, so ideally Austin will go in the event that we lose. I feel bad because he is a sweetheart, but he doesn't fit into my strategy, and if anyone understands game being game, he does.

I love my new tribe??? Not only is nick still here so that gives me a safety net, the sammy I like is here. Pat is here. No idea who eve is but that’s okay too. I’m loving this. Inb4 I get voted out next Bc they actually really fucking hate me :^). Byebye payton it was nice kinda knowing you? Hello ~hopefully~ friends <3

I forgot Austin has a date with Mary Jane daily so Im gonna have to cut him some slack.

Tribe swap....just what I didn't want to happen . I dont ha e my #1 ashley with me but at least I got issac here. Jared is on my tribe now too so that could go either way for me because he knows how I play the game. Gonna have to pull something out if my ass here .

This is for Alyssa you dumb ugly fat white bitch why you keep asking me for a confessional with trifling dirty white racist ass big fat bitch x Anyways. Made an alliance with Pat and Sammy! V excited to work with them but we’re snapping in immunity so, I don’t see why we would need to vote off Vi.... I mean someone at tribal! Hehe

Well....we got our last handed to us. I'm not happy going to tribal bc I feel I'll be the one going. I talk with jared and issac the most but I feel jared will stick with xander and dylan. Just gotta try to wiggle myself in some where.

I have been busy the past couple of days so this challenge being a endurance/speed comp was a struggle. And it looks like my team didn't do much. To help... It's fine we can get out one of these other two dead weights. Speaking of them. Im glad the swap merged me with two allies but the other two just suck to talk to... And that's coming from me .. Jess knows what I'm talking about. Anyways I don't want them here and want them gone. As for my allies. I like Jared a lot we are getting along and enjoying ourselves. He's definitely the one I trust most in this game and hopefully it gets me to merge where I can start phase 2 and hopefully get far. Dylan is fine .. he's offline a lot but he's from old tribe so like it helps. 

Just finished the challenge, OH MY GOD i suck at trivia but thankfully sammy snapped and we won, thank u sammy love u so much!!! Still dont believe he is straight tho x IM JOKING PLS DONT KILL MEDFHNSJFDH

I hate confessions. That’s my confession for the round... jkjk. Eh there isn’t much to talk about now that it’s tribal time. I hope whoever from our og tribe stays safe but I forgot who is there so oops. Sammy killed it. I still call bs on the centipede question but oh well. It wouldn’t have changed the result. It would have just made the gap close by 1. 

LOVE MY NEW TRIBE. So happy we swapped. I’m with actual love of my life ASHLEY!!! And Chloe is amazing too. Aidan popped off in the challenge. Keaton is Keaton. This is a good group and I’m glad they did rlly well in the challenge. I love this kind of thing but I wasn’t able to constantly be on my phone all weekend bc that’s rude :( so I’m glad it worked out. Hoping the tribe swap works out in our favor and Xander jared and Dylan stay together for the vote. Idk if Isaac and jared are friends??? I hope Isaac leaves because he knows I’m a ‘threat’ in games and because I think Ashley yelled at him once. Idk who Austin is but Ashley likes him. But idk how likely that is if Isaac and jared have a connection. As long as jared stays safe ifgaf who leaves.

Yowza. We got absolutely wrecked in the challlenge. I don't WANT to lose any challenges, but I believe in the long run I should be happy to take this L. As another way to show my loyalty, I decided to give my idol progress in the chat with Xander and Dylan. I noticed Dylan never reciprocated so that gives me 1 reason to be wary. Then, Dylan posted a very inappropriate joke in the tribe chat in reference to Survivor Thailand, and the word "rape" was used, so that was the 2nd thing to make me uneasy. At first, Dylan and Xander had no opinion on who to vote, so I voiced that I would like to vote Austin- then Dylan remembered who Isaac is and said "he can go." I eventually got things back on track to target Austin, but Dylan better be careful- it's 3 strikes and you're out with me. I have a good relationship with Isaac so I wouldn't be surprised to see Dylan go if we lose again.

Day 9 on the survivor tribe. My thoughts are about toes and only toes. They are consuming my entire day. I exist merely to think of toes. 

Also Chloe...

Okay so I’m just gonna throw down some of my thoughts right now since I’ve been very quiet in confessionals. I fucking hate these small ass fucking tribes. It makes the thought of going to tribal terrifying because your odds of going home are increased. Since the swap ive actually really been enjoying my time, I really like my new tribe and I feel I can actually connect with these people better than on my first tribe. I am glad to actually have Aidan with me because he’s like THE person I want to work with from my og tribe, along with Vi. I still have my reservations on Nick even though I think he’s nice I can’t trust him as far as I could throw him. I really feel that the trivia challenge brought us closer together as a tribe since what’s a better bonding experience than yelling at Jess that she’s wrong 50 times in one day. I think we’re all collectively quite strong and I really hope that means we can slide past for a while without going to tribal. 

Honestly i always forget what i confess from last time but i still think I’m in a good position in the game. However I really do not want to go to tribal because I don’t want to show my cards. Eve and Pat both want me to work with them so we have an alliance and then Vi and Nick approached me and want to work with me as well. This was completely surprising to me bc I felt as if I would just be an easy vote out if we were to go to tribal since I’m a lone wolf. However I’m in the middle and I feel somewhat powerful knowing that people want to keep me and want to work with me. Me and nick have had a rocky relationship in past games but i think he’s a great person. He’s just a wildcard. I love vi and i think she’s the sweetest person to have ever existed but my gut is telling me to work with pat and Eve atleast for the first vote. Hopefully I don’t have to make the decision but who knows. That’s all I have for now other than I think the idol system isn’t anything I keep getting zapped. I feel like a fly in a southern home...ZAP.

I couldn’t remember the day so I put 69. I hate this tribe with my whole heart and my whole bussy. Jared is the only one giving me any sort of shot at making it passed this round. Austin is a slime ball who will do anything to save his own skin, Xander is dead apparently, and Dylan has been tracking down places where famous people died. I feel like this is my own personal hell and while I’ve been assured that Austin is going home (which I wouldn’t be surprised was a lie) I still have to make a swap or a merge and with the clowns on this tribe being inactive and never talking about anything but Star Wars or not talking at all I don’t know how possible it is to win a goddamn challenge. 

*insert Da'vonne pretends to be shoocked gif at a swap* Since it didn't happen at 16 I wasn't surprised too see it at 15 but I'm glad because three tribes provides for much more buffer. My initial reaction to my tribe was positive as I saw that I had Chloe and three new people in the mix. I'm not gonna lie that I was getting bored on my old tribe but I do hope that Nick is doing alright. He's one ally that I'd love to connect with again... Vi is alright too but I don't know how strong of a connection we fostered. First impressions of my new tribemates: Keaton - I heard he was fucking with my friend in another game so my guard was up but I tried and he seems aloof and random with his contributions but it makes sense since he's playing 4 games at once. Will probably work off of the others who contribute in challenges? We'll see. Ashley - Sweet and seems like a hard worker. Not too much of a read on her yet Owen - He seems nice and genuine but not much of a read from a game perspective yet. It seems the split is 2-2-1 on my tribe from previous tribes but I don't know how strict to tribal lines people are going to play but I can feel some aloofness with Keaton and Ashley is traveling so... that's that on that. If we were going to tribal I have no idea what the fuck would happen but I want to strengthen connections. Honestly I think we can make it to the merge without hitting an elimination but who knows. THANKFULLLLLLLY my ass had a lucky night on the railroads and jumped to spot number fifty and apparently found a STEAL A VOTE. This is what I DESERVE. Thank you Old West Gods for blessing me, the star, with this iconic power. I'm glad I have it in my back pocket and I'm not telling a fucking soul. If it needs to be used, it will be flaunted and I will pop shit. Hopefully I can save it for after merge but if I need to control a pre-merge vote just to get my way, I'm going to do it. 

https://soundcloud.com/user-327042896/dylan-ep-2

[lchaiim]

❨ shit i’ve heard at college, part 2: a sentence starter ❩

❨ wow my first semester of my sophomore year isn’t even over yet but i’ve heard a lot of shit, so i thought i may as well divide this up into multiple posts over time. here’s 96 sentences i’ve heard in this first half of my first semester of sophomore year. a sequel to PART ONE and PART 1.5: SHIT I HEARD THIS SUMMER ❩

“The porn industry is moving swimmingly.”

“We all need men. Go find them.”

“It’s not an opera, bitches, it’s a flight.”

“Don’t look! It makes their dick bigger!”

“I have my own place and I can light as many candles as I want.”

“I’m not a librarian, sir.”

“How’s your sack lunch, bitch?”

“Stab me in the ass and turn me into Kim Kardashian.”

“I stayed up another hour just to cry.”

“I just got a nude and I don’t know how to feel about it.”

“I’m gonna go stab my eyes out now.”

“We get it. You have a big truck and a small penis.”

“It’s an epidemic, _____!”

“There’s no cups, so I’m using a bowl. To drink apple juice.”

“Fuck y’all, I’m eating Fruit Loops.”

“I don’t know my superhero name, but here I am with my can of Lysol and my plastic fork.”

“Your list of things to do includes making the best 2000s playlist of all time and fighting me at Cheesecake Factory.”

“This is borderline human abuse.”

“How do you feel about fluorescent lighting?”

“I’m sorry, I’m on a college budget. I’ll give you two nickels and a paper clip.”

“We couldn’t say ‘Hell’ because, like, Catholic school problems.”

“I don’t want them to call me and be like ‘we’re about to drill into your face’!”

“Ugh, yes, the hot TA, what club are you in?”

“My rat bastard dad? What about him?”

“Would you like to complete this coon-ass tattoo zoo with some other animals?”

“I have an idea that I’m positive no other human has ever had: butter flavored ice cream.”

“I hate myself, but I’m funny, so...”

“This man loves puppies and he is not afraid to say it.”

“There’s just something about stale food that I really like.”

“I like how we’re watching our upcoming death on TV.”

“When I get wasted, I want to fight. It’s a problem.”

“My boyfriend got really drunk and started drinking nectar out of the hummingbird feeder.”

“He currently has a child.”

“That’s a good way of getting rid of a baby.”

“He can’t look at his dead parents or his live children.”

“I can’t focus on reading cause I just wanna watch Drake and Josh.”

“My roommate loves manifestos. Especially the Communist Manifesto.”

“Have you studied his naked body or something?”

“Okay, our Greek tragic playwrights: we got Sophocles... Euripides... uh... Isosceles...”

“We’re so stupid we click things that say ‘click here for here’.”

“So there were just ninety-five loose pigs.”

“This is called shaming.”

“I can’t be the only person who says meatballs and spaghetti.”

“We get it -- you’re in a sorority, and you wanna show him your handshake, because, like, you’re in a sorority, but he wants to be in your pants either way.”

“What could go wrong...? -- ...oh shit, I’m on fire.”

“Don’t call _____ unless you wanna suck dick tonight.”

“There’s no one around. He’s talking to his dick.”

“Just cause it’s Greek doesn’t mean it’s sophisticated.”

“I hate myself, but I hate her more.”

“I don’t know anything about it, but it has 'bread’ in the name, so I want to try it.”

“Just don’t breathe in this class.”

“_____, secret crop top wearer.”

“I’m embracing my aesthetic while you’re embracing Jon Hamm’s face.”

“What are we doing tonight besides homework -- and bread...?”

“I’m witnessing a breakup, right here in the Starbucks line.”

“I nominate Gushers as a snack suggestion, but, like, a lot of them. All of them.”

“I have a strong immune system.”

“I was so worked up about the bolo ties.”

“Also, I was wine drunk, so...”

“Does she hit him? I hope she hits him.”

“Only Matthew McConaughey drives Lincolns.”

“Oh, yeah, I’m totally a Republican... Pence is daddy...”

“After that... is the exact same thing... from a different angle.”

“All my life, I’ve been striving to be better than Kidz Bop.”

“Is ‘slaveitude’ a word?”

“Ted Bundy was attractive, people knew him.”

“I feel like whoever’s in charge of the Reeses company is really high right now. Like, putting Reeses inside of Reeses.”

“One beer bottle on campus might be a problem, but if there’s 8, they’re props.”

“With elevators, it’s not claustrophobia, it’s that I don’t trust the government.”

“Headphones: in. World: out. Notes font: ugly.”

“You know that’s a felony, right?”

“That’s a... fourth or fifth impression kind of story.”

“That means she definitely fucked a member of KISS.”

“I feel free, but also ugly.”

“This is my unassigned assigned seat and if any of you take it, I will fight you.”

��I went to the Home Depot, bought a bunch of lights, put them up in the air, and said ‘this is art’.”

“Because I was a full New Yorker, I just kept walking.”

“We almost died, but our last meal would’ve been free, so...”

“I want to be a Privacy Pop model.”

“What’s a funeral like in 2017? GIFs and memes.”

“I would like to thank not only God but also Tinder.”

“I sat through a 40 minute argument about how Justin Bieber started the Cold War.”

“I’m just walking down the hallway, thinking about ways to throw myself down the stairs and make it look like an accident.”

“Now, if it was Kidz Bop, I would go see it.”

“Don’t name your kid Ethelwold.”

“Shoulders, chest, pants, shoes: a vision for America.”

“My dad’s not getting dick from anyone.”

“I’m a shady beach, and y’all are my shady beaches.”

“Oh, no, don’t write that down...”

“At Chipotle, God himself picked those avocados and put them in the guacamole.”

“It should be a holiday: Ohio Awareness Day.”

“We should go to a nice place. A formal place. California Pizza Kitchen.”

“What do you do in geology lab? Dissect rocks?”

“What great weather for a mental breakdown.”

“He’s not computer generated; he’s actually that large.”

“I’ve done some soul searching, and I think that ranch dressing is my favorite food.”

[survivornavarino]

Episode #9: I’m A Fighter -Jake

*loud screeching noise* AHHHHHHHHHH omfg i cant believe we just did that #beam 4 life ok so like i feel horrible because i love drew but he was trying to make an alliance and it didnt include me and i had to take him out before it was too late because while it wouldnt be me this vote it probably would next time so like sorry drew i love u im sure this doesnt help my case for like why u should b my friend but like i rlly am sorry.  also i feel bad for lying to jake but it just wouldve gotten back to drew and i didnt want to risk that.  im hoping he doesnt hate me too much for blindsiding his ally but like again, they were trying to have a majority alliance that i wasnt a part of and i just didn't want to deal with it tbh.  maybe jake and i are just doomed to eternally be on separate sides in games idk (sad music plays) umm trixie idk we dont really talk we just kind of coexist UM HOLDUP JESUS CHRIST WE JUST FUCKING MERGED WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK WIG ON PLUTO WHAT TO HECK ????? im off to plot heathers demise xoxo gossip beckka

Woot Woot its merge loves. Time to be a complete mess and be first merge boot. Hehehe

I MADE IT, MY SECOND ATHENA GAME AND I MADE IT TO MERGE AGAIN IM INCREDIBLEY HAPPY. Let’s hope I don’t get eighth place again, and if I’m gonna be honest I need Drew gone if I’m gonna win. He’s so fucking good at challenges. So eliminating him would mainly be out of fear.

Remember how I’m a dumbass? Me too ok so Drew was eliminated already.

Excuse me I am stupid and don't get letters are better as numbers... and also reversed. I would like an explanation plzz

words tried in number form and reversed so far that have not worked. Emily-Amanda-Abbey-Francie, Navarino, Survivor, Athena. Im gonna cry I cant find it yet.

Oh yeah tea, I ended up finding a secret advantage called the deja vote which means I can steal someone’s vote from a tribal and re-use it at a later tribal 

This was originally going to me a vlog of me screaming after tribal but I busy last night and fell asleep before doing it so now I'm more calm and just gonna type out. Okay so looking back at my last confessional, bitch I'm boo boo the fool. I seriously thought Eddie and Autumn were being honest with me because I trust(ed) them sooo much, but it turns out they were playing me and orchestrating a Drew blindside behind my back. So before I went out last night, EVERYONE told me they were voting Matt. Then two minutes before the vote, Eddie and Autumn message me like "JAKE! Are you here??? SOMETHING is happening" like bitch shut the fuck up something is not happening don't act like this shit just happened last minute. Then they say "Drew is getting voted out tonight!" So...I went to Drew and told him to play the idol if he had it. Because I didn't want Matt staying if I was voting for him. But Drew said he didn't have an idol, and Eddie found out that I told Drew and told Autumn. So after I got home I messaged the group chat with Eddie and Autumn and told them that I was upset by them lying to me bc I did trust them the most. Then Autumn decided to get ballsy and reply "I don't buy that at all since you told Drew to play his idol, you were more loyal to him than me." GIRL STFU yes the fuck I did tell Drew because you told me TWO MINS BEFORE TRIBAL - MEANING YOU KEPT THE VOTE HIDDEN FROM ME ALL DAY. DON'T SAY IM DISLOYAL WHEN YOU WERE THE BIGGEST MFING SNAKE THIS ROUND! ...Anyways. Autumn then tries to come for me by saying "So tell, what's with this alliance between you, Eddie, Drew, and Trixie." And this is when I got more mad. BC Drew proposed this alliance to me, but it was never made, hell I didn't even tell Trixie about it. And when I told Eddie about it I told him I think we should tell Autumn about the alliance (Since he wanted to as well) So it became clear that Autumn was spreading to rebecka and matt that I was in an actual alliance with them to get them all to turn on us. So um Autumn, I wanted to trust you and go far with you in this game, but you're dead to me in this game now and I want you GONE. Autumn has the most connections here. She has Eddie, Rebecka, Matt, Ben, and I've heard that she has Mitch as well. She is a huge threat and if I can find a way to take her out, I will. But right now I need to focus on surviving. After the vote, Trixie added me to a call with Julia. Julia told us all of the alliances she's in (and she's in a damn lot) and said she basically likes Trixie more so she's working with us. Umm okay that's cool. I hope she's being serious because my life in this game is in Julia's hands now. She has all these connections and I need to get her to gun for someone that isn't me, Trixie, or Shoib. I've decided that my ideal final 3 would be with Trixie and Shoib because I trust them the most now, we've been together since day one, and we're all fans. It would be perfect. Sooo yeah. I also talked to Heather and basically blamed Tyler for all the animosity between us. I am trying to repair relationships and hopefully push the target off my back because I am worried about being targeted for 12th. IDK WHAT ELSE TO DO! I am in SUCH a bad position right now and it's so annoying. At the start of this game I had a lot of allies and the two people who trusted me the most (Tyler and Drew) are gone. But I'm a FIGHTER. I will NOT give up! I was in the minority at merge in crossroads and turned it around and made it to FTC so I just have to keep pushing and hopefully I'll get the same results! Woo wig! This was originally going to me a vlog of me screaming after tribal but I busy last night and fell asleep before doing it so now I'm more calm and just gonna type out.

https://youtu.be/iUDlOxxgtz0 my face in the thumbnail for this video is so funny cause it's when i found out of another to do the idol search. Obviously we know it didn't work adhshjks

I am pumped for this merge, I feel like I am playing a really under the radar game and it will make people come to me and ask me to vote with them if the game does break down into two sides, which I think it will. I trust Julia and Trixie the most right now and Trixie has two FREAKING idols omg. I also trust Mitch and Autumn but they are my secondary alliance which I will fall back on if I lose Trixie and Julia

Ok so no one is really messaging me about the vote, which is scary. I don't want to be first merge boot. The only people who have spoke to me are Matt, which he is confused, and Jake, which says no one really spoke to him about the vote yet. I did hear that people thought Ben and I were close, which like we have voted together, but aren't to close. I know now that Trixie has an idol and someone found the merge idol so FUN. I CAN'T WAIT TO BE FIRST MERGE BOOT.

Me starting a grassroots movement of Ben vs Heather cause I'm not aligned with either? Yep. Me forcing people to show their hands and make choices? Absolutely https://68.media.tumblr.com/41399c7dcc99b69388de05d609f7323c/tumblr_inline_o6ola1oDhw1sso1z7_500.gif Look none of these votes will be easy cause I like everyone and I'm aligned with almost everyone but it's Survivor I ain't scurd. I neeevvveerrr talk to Ben or Heather so I'm just gonna be a swing vote in the mess I created. Also feel free to give me the villain edit that's the one thing I haven't accomplished in Athena, besides winning or beating my placement. If not that's cool too I'll just continue to be my messy antihero self. Ok bye! Time to disappear and let the drama fester while I'm at work

You know what would be great, if more people would know who the vote is gonna be. Won't be surprised if that is me to be quite honest. Right now I hear Ben and if that is the only name I hear, I'll do it.

i never thought i'd say this but I WANNA HEX JULIA THE WITCH. okay not really bc i dont want her to read this and think im actually mad. but im wary of what i say to her now considering she told heather about my idol hehe

The votes for me cuz Beckka is bitter over another game. At least in that game I didn't isolate her. I'm prob just gonna cry in a corner.

This is a mess

this round has been a fucking mess and a half and im too busy rn trying to save my ass to make it all sophisticated i have a lot to say so if i stay ill explain everything later but basically autumn came to me today saying she wants to flip on ben so im trying to rally eddie trixie shoib julia and heather to get 7 on ben but apparently ben is throwing my name out bc he doesnt want to vote heathwr and immm fucking nervous idek if heather will wanna vote ben now if hes trying to save her what if she flips like this is bad help

The first merge vote is stressful as fuck cus there’s 12 people. I’m fine as long as it’s not me.

Don't know what's going on. Voting heather and hoping it works!!!!!

Good god am I glad I'm immune for this bullshit Let's start with merge. Woo merge! The idol system is announced. I actually make progress on the advantage hunt! Then I finish it. And someone already has it. GREAT So then I try the idol hunt and someone ALSO has it! GREATER. So now I have to worry about that shit. So I won immunity somehow because I guess preparing was a good idea since I blew through the second round. I won't be first merge boot in Athena woo!!! But now the vote is fucking crazy. I want to vote out Heather because, as sweet as she is, she's got a lot of ears listening for info for her and it's better to get someone like that out early before it's too late. But people don't want to because they're the ears! Big surprise. People are between Jake and Ben and Heather and honestly? I want to keep Ben around a little more. My plan for now is to not have one big alliance, but rather to be a part of small trio alliances so people can have my back without the worry of a huge alliance fracturing. I just have to keep the trio members safe. My planned trios are as follows: Ben, Mo, myself Shoib, Autumn, myself Rebecka, Julia, myself (WIP) That's 7 people who have my back in varying circumstances, as long as they're being truthful. I've also been alerted to a greater alliance of Matt, Ben, Julia, Mo, and Rebecka. Hopefully this trio plan will help me get in with those people more, and perhaps in the close future I can take out Matt and get rid of that variable.

i made merge!! its lit!! there hasnt been a lot going on so far. nobodys really reached out to me and ive been so busy so im just going with what rebecka wants, which is heather. i’m not sure voting heather is a good move for me, in fact i know its not, but unfortunatelt i dont have the time to make another move and im just tryin to survive

What is going on here on this day? This is a mess and i'm just on the train a long for the ride. I'm hearing Ben, Jake, and Heather, but I wouldn't be surprised if it's me tonight. Like I'm sure they're afraid of Jake having an idol, so why not throw their votes on someone who's irrelevant at the moment and who probably wouldn't see it coming? Anyway, I HIGHLY doubt Ben is leaving tonight, and I don't really believe that the votes are going on Heather or Jake, idk idk idk idk idk idk idk idk idk idk idk idk. I really hope Jake stays, and I really hope Ben goes or I am probably screwed af.

[devilsadvocate007]

Facebook Posts July 2010 - December 2010

4th July 2010

The illusion that everybody's opinion matters has created a society in which stupidity must be considered just as seriously as brilliance. Gone are the days where stupid people weren't allowed to talk while big people were talking. Now they have their own facebook pages.... On the bright side, we no longer have to rely on television for entertainment

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10th July 2010

♫ Just gonna stand there and watch me burn....well that's alright because I like the way it hurts......Just gonna stand there and hear me cry....well that's alright because I love the way you lie...♫  - ‘Love the way you lie’, Rihanna ft. Eminem

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14th July 2010

If there's no such thing as no such thing, then there is such a thing as no such thing, which means that there really is no such thing as no such thing.

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15th July 2010

Bad?: So I was standing next to a fat girl and I turned to her and said "moo". At first she started to cuss and call me names and tell me about my mother. I quietly said "moo" again without lifting my gaze. This time she started screaming and clawing at me. For the last time...I said "moo". She stopped and looked at me, then after a minute of silence she said "father?"

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25th July 2010

You know you're doing something wrong when your fiancée tells you "I'd rather be his whore than your wife"... ♥ Titanic

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30th July 2010

You ever meet someone so dumb that you think they're up to something? "What?....no....what you playing at?....wait.....you're serious?"

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5th August 2010

The 1st tao of Jarid: {For all those in a relationship...the sentence "It doesn't matter anymore, I have a man, I'm gonna let loose" is not acceptable unless you're talking about a party or sex.}

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6th August 2010

I know I'm not the only person that finds irony in the fact that the guy that recently beat the JAMAICAN Bolt, is called Mr. Gay. lol "Gay shocks Bolt in Stockholm" is the Headline....So what did we learn? U can run from gays all u want my Jamaican brethren, but it'll catch up with you eventually...

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15th August 2010

Life is too short to waste on people who don't realize how awesome you are. I knew an awesome person who never followed the crowd or did what was 'expected'. She's gone now, but I can say she lived her life the way she wanted to, surrounded by people she liked who definitely liked her. When my time comes, I want someone to say the same about me. So fuck off and thank you.

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17th August 2010

Can someone explain to me how purposely doing something that makes your guy friends happy and like u, but at the same time leaves ur woman unhappy and unsatisfied, isn't gay? "Bow cat" it would seem is the opposite of "battyman"....not synonymous.

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20th August 2010

"Ur like a giant fucking cock blocking robot developed in a secret government lab or something" - Zombieland (lmao)

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21st August 2010

♫ That's alright, thats ok....g'on head believe what ur home girls say...a nigga like me drink alotta liquor, meet alotta bitches, take alotta pictures....I might break bread with 1 or 2 strippers, but that don't mean u gotta pull my zipper...thinkin that I dicked down the whole town, even tho I got dick to go round ♫ - ‘Smell yo dick’, Kay Luv

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22nd August 2010

♫ You say its my fault, ok then I'll go...its better to know...how theres nobody to argue with...cuz im not home...dont care who ur with....dont call my phone...or did u forget...u know you're wrong...I'm gone....and you're all alone....hearing your own damn...eh echo eh echo ♫ - ‘Echo’, Gorilla Zoe

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8th September 2010

♫ A penny for my thoughts, oh no I'll sell them for a dollar, They're worth so much more after I'm a goner, And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singin', Funny when your dead how people start listenin'...If I die young ♫ - ‘If I die young’, The Band Perry

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10th September 2010

The tao of Jarid: "Facebook is not a place to publish things you wish to remain private. By its very nature, anything put on here voluntarily is for people to notice, see, and by extension comment or ask about. Getting defensive when asked about something YOU put up in the public domain makes no sense."

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11th September 2010

The tao of Jarid: "Women treat the male gene pool like a real pool. They all jump in and splash around the shallow end in their youth...then wade out to the deeper end as they get older."

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15th September 2010

“Watching your daughter being collected by her date feels like handing over a million dollar [violin] to a gorilla.” - Jim Bishop

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17th September 2010

Taxi driver on the way home today: "You see men? Especially young men like you? You need to eat raw foods. Lemme tell u the other night I was with my gf and no matter WHAT position I put her in...me deya fight fi cum! FIRST time me haffu TRY cum. All when me done, cocky stiff stiff"

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22nd September 2010

Birthdays on facebook are really opportunities for people that never speak to you to subtly say "I care! Don't delete me! Look how I wrote on ur wall!" lol

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23rd September 2010

The tao of Jarid: The lawyer most people know is the American lawyer. That's why lawyers have a bad name. Caribbean lawyers are nothing like their American counterparts (the laws and practices here are vastly different). People should remember that before they band all "lawyers" together.

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23rd September 2010

Listen, I understand that having a BB means that u can talk to anyone at anytime for free, but seriously...10 grown ppl sitting in a room engrossed in their phones not speaking to each other, is ridiculous. What happend to common courtesy, what happened to meeting new people and saying hi to a stranger? Sheesh. U remind me of little kids in church playing their gameboys.

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26th September 2010

U know what I hate? The fact that hypocrisy is so prevalent. Any time you see someone stand up and strongly take a stand against something...9/10 times they do it. If they vehemently denounce homosexuals, 9/10 times, they're sleeping with little boys. Its SO common now, that I never want to take a strong stand against anything, lest ppl think I secretly do it. Chupz.

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The tao of Jarid: For those of you who believe that "no means no, but unconscious means yes".....a prison cell awaits.

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28th September 2010

The legal way of saying “nigga stole my bike”:  “ A human being of the male gender wth black pigmentation on his skin appears 2 have acquired without my consent my 2-wheeled, non-motorized private and/or recreational transportation, also known as "bike", and appears 2 have driven away with said 2-wheeled, non-motorized private and/or recreational transportation, despite my attempt of chasing the said human being, completely ignoring my request 2 give sed item bk” - username iani103. Man, I love my profession.

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1st October 2010

I think women should develop the same "fuck it" mechanism guys have. If there's a baby in the house crying for hours on end...what you will not find is a man around. Y? Cuz we can't fix it and its driving us crazy, so we roll out and go by Tony's house to watch football, i.e. fuk it. More women should do that instead of staying in the stress and snapping and shaking their babies to death or driving them into a river.

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The tao of Jarid: Facebook should have a 'WHO CARES?!?' button....and make my page immune to it.

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2nd October 2010

The tao of Jarid: The more "LMAO"s and "LOLOLOL"s your status contains, the less funny the actual subject matter is. Contrary to popular belief, nothing gets funnier the more you laugh at it by yourself.

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Grown men's fascination with penitentiary pussy confuses me... Sex with it = go to prison. What's the problem? Where's the option? All I see is "Sex with prison". No thanks. That's like the "option" 'get in this dark van so I can drive u to my abandoned cabin in the woods or I shoot you'. All I should be hearing is *gunshot*.

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4th October 2010

The tao of Jarid: Drama vampires are not cool. While the rest of us need food and water to live, these creatures survive solely off drama and other people viewing it. The only effective way to deal with them is to block and delete them from everything. If you can't see their drama, they weaken and die. True story.

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“I think when you put sex and spirituality in the same bottle and shake it up, bad things happen. Yes, I said I kissed a girl. But I didn’t say I kissed a girl while f-ing a crucifix.” - Katy Perry (on why she dislikes Lady Gaga’s music video for ‘Alejandro’) 

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5th October 2010

"This is my facade of civility; do not mistake for complacency, for once this veil is taken down, you'll see a vicious turn around...of all you grew to know and love...the hand lying beneath the glove.... An animal living in a shell. A beast who's come to raise all hell."

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6th October 2010

The tao of Jarid: Forget CNN, BBC or any other news organisation....nowhere else are world issues more discussed than on YouTube's comments section

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8th October 2010

You are one person, out of 7 billion people, on one planet, out of 8 planets, in one solar system out of a hundred billion solar systems, in one galaxy out of a hundred billion galaxies.......you are ENORMOUSLY insignificant, and don't let facebook ever make you forget that. [De-motivational Speech for the day]

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11th October 2010

Anybody remember when they FIRST came on fb YEARS ago? How it used to be? How Fb made hi5 look like the social networking ghetto? It was so clean and neat and classy. "Jarid Hewlett", likes, interests, lil about myself. Send ur friends who u havent seen since primary school messages. It was a magical innocent time. Why did you people have to rape facebook? Why?

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Now? as NC17 says, no more "Jarid Hewlett", we have "Jarid fuckspussyallday Hewlett", we have "What kind of telly tubby would u have sex with?" quizzes, we have people fighting over who their baby's daddy is for the world to see. (Btw when did this shit become acceptable? Not knowing which guy ejaculated inside and impregnated you is something people used to be ashamed of and settle in private...why is it cool to broadcast this now?), we have break ups where guys blatantly put their numbers under "X is no longer in a relationship"..... What happened to CLASS??? I understand they don't teach that in school, but they bloody well should. No one comes on fb to keep in touch with people anymore. And the ones that do, spend 20% of their total fb time doing that. The rest of us laugh or bow our heads in sadness at the ridiculous shit people post. I'm black and I hate racists and racism, but goddamn it....sometimes, as much as I hate to admit it.....I see where they're coming from. <sigh>

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15th October 2010

♫ We're going out tonight...to kick out every light, take anything we want, drink everything in sight, we're going till the world stops turning while we burn it to the ground tonight! ♫ - ‘Burn it to the ground’, Nickelback

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21st October 2010

The tao: Men get bitter, just as women do. The difference is, a bitter woman will say "fuck men" and never have sex again. A bitter man will say "fuck women" and do just that.

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26th October 2010

The tao: "All inclusive" does not mean "free cheap rum and vodka with juice". Stop the false advertising.

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27th October 2010

The tao: Having high standards doesn't necessarily exempt you from whoredom. While we all agree that having low to no standards makes one a ho, having high, meaningless standards makes one a ho too. "I only sleep with guys that drive BMWs" is a high standard. It is not a substantive standard.

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♫ And who do you think you are? Running round leaving scars....Collecting your jar of hearts, tearing love apart........You’re gonna catch a cold, from the ice inside your soul.........So don’t come back for me, who do you think you are? ♫  - ‘Jar of Hearts’, Christina Perri

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28th October 2010

"Labour all de way"? "UPP all de way?".....come on, man. I'm "all the way" with whoever makes Antigua a better country. Politics has come to mean arbitrary following of a party that makes your immediate life better regardless of the long term. Don't even get me started on 'patriotism'.

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31st October 2010

The tao: He who is slow to anger gets annoyed the longest.

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1st November 2010

♫....you just hurt my goddamn feelings, and that was the last one I had ♫ - ‘Here we go’, Eminem

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2nd November 2010

Lawyer talk: My Lord, my client was not anywhere near the building when the window was broken, and if he was, he did not break the window, and if he did break the window, he did so by accident, and if he didn't break it by accident, it wasn't the complainant's window, and if it was their window, it was their fault for putting it where my client throws stones.

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8th November 2010

Mr. Kartel, you sir, have lied to me.....apparently women do not want a man whose "buddy long like a thousand match stick line up"....apparently that hurts and more than 90% of it will be outside anyway. You have misled me sir, and I demand an apology.

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10th November 2010

On a serious note.....which do you think is more "loving" and less "heartless"? (Option A) Being in a relationship and cheating gratuitously on your significant other? Or (Option B) breaking up with your significant other who probably didn't see it coming, because you want to sleep with someone else?

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11th November 2010

The tao: No one really sees anything. Everyone thinks they see something. I might think I see a pudgy, ugly woman, you might think you see a curvy goddess. Who knows whats actually there...The difference between sane and insane people is that insane people are just a little more creative with what they think they see....and nothing can change their mind.

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14th November 2010

The tao: If someone tells you something you don't understand, don't repeat it. It might have been wisdom when they told you...but after your brain is done with it, there's a high chance it comes back out as crap.

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15th November 2010

"You're Cuban AND Jamaican?? That's a really.....illegal mix, lol. So you speak Spanish and bloodclaat?" - Mike Yard (*dead*)

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17th November 2010

The tao: One should never let emotions get in the way of reality. Sometimes people just don't appreciate you no matter how you feel about them. That's ok. Someone does.

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19th November 2010

♫ Well I'm a poet to some, a regular modern day Shakespeare.....Jesus Christ, the King of these latter day saints here ♫ - ‘Renegade’, Jay-Z & Eminem

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25th November 2010

The tao: Whenever you think "don't let a good thing pass you by"....remember that many things are only good now BECAUSE you let them pass you by at first. Don't be afraid to let go.

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26th November 2010

"If my wanting to see you was on a scale of 1-10.....I'd still say no". It takes a while to fully appreciate just how horrible this statement is.

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27th November 2010

U know what I just realized..?..The first time I listened to the Marshall Mathers LP was on *cassette*...in my * Walkman*....that Michael Henry had copied for me.....I'm gonna reserve my rocking chair in the old folks home from now, see...

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The tao: Stop saying "I'm just me". Everyone is just them. If you choose to be someone who tries to be like other people, that's still who you are. You are just a personalityless ninny, but it's still who YOU are. You can't ever be anything else but you. "I'm just me" is like saying "I breathe oxygen". No shit.

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♫ Me start da day wit a flask, cranberry an ice inna glass....satellite can't find me me lost....buy me own liquor cuz me a me own boss....drink fi drunk dat me endorse....OH ♫ - ‘Rum & Red Bull’, Beenie Man &Future Fambo

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30th November 2010

Seriously....if I read one more comment under a political story with someone urging people to "wake up", I'm going to slap somebody. I always find it fascinating that politics turns otherwise sensible people into jackasses. "Belief is the enemy of reality".

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Lesbians have life so easy.....girls are very gay normally, lol. Dressing in front of each other, dancing up with one another, feeling up one another etc.....you could pretty much spend ur whole life being a lesbian and no one would ever know once u lie every now and again about some boy u find hot.

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"The fact is governments deal with the United States because it's in their interest, not because they like us, not because they trust us and not because they think we can keep secrets," - US Secretary of Defense Robert Gates. If that's not gangsta, I dunno what is...

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2nd December 2010

♫ I love my life....none a we don't know wey tomorrow might bring cuz the future deh hours away...so me go live my life today...me ah live my life today...so lowe me mek me talk what me want fi talk, me have nuff fi say...so me go live my life today...me ah go live my life today ♫ - ‘I love my life’, Demarco

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7th December 2010

The tao: Never overestimate the power of friendship.

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9th December 2010

♫ De boy ketch me a stamp up him gyal postcard....want arrest me but....him anna sarge....he nah stop tell me how him a camouflage....never voice ya hear from him vocal cord because.....a we mek nuff man start drink Guinness ♫ - ‘A we’, Hawkeye

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11th December 2010

The tao: The next time someone you thought you mattered to lets you down, always remember that its not their fault you don't have better friends.

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17th December 2010

Men beware: "Your mouth says no, but your eyes say yes" will never ever stand up in court.

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19th December 2010

The tao: Stop bitching about the 'true meaning' of Christmas. People like presents. Deal with it.

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21st December 2010

The tao: Put on a jamaican accent and include "bloodclaat" or "bumboclaat" and any sentence becomes five times funnier. E.g. "Where are u going, u unhygienic homosexual?" "Yow, a where dis dutty skin, yellow teet, shitty draws BUMBOCLAAT battybwoy a go?" Same message. Five times funnier.

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25th December 2010

The tao: "I have a boyfriend".........."Babes....you can have ALL the boyfriends you want...not "a", not "some".....ALL.....me still want u". - This conversation will always go like this. Saying you have a boyfriend is not a substitute for saying no.

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30th December 2010

New year new me! "Are u getting a sex change?" What? no..... "Are you changing careers?" Um..no.. "Are you radically overhauling your entire personality?" Not really... "Shut up and sit down"