#work in progress so please don't hate me
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wholesome-cryptid · 3 months ago
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gripping myself by the shoulders, i am a grown adult man who is able to engage with media critically, im allowed to like pieces of media that have problematic elements, i am able to recognize that these things are bad and not endorse those aspects of it. shaking myself, i am not a morally bad person for like fire emblem.
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yzashaven · 1 year ago
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pairing ☆ scaramouche x fem!reader
content warnings ☆ nsfw content ahead. unprotected sex. hate fuck. rough sex. slapping. spanking. degradation + praising. overstimulation. nipple sucking. creampie. hair pulling. marking. riding. mating press. prone bone. "whore, slut, baby"
note .ᐟ HEYYY so like... it's been a while, yes? 3 months since my last post, how is everyone? i made this yesterday randomly at 3am and didn't really feel like posting it on the new blog (that is still in progress) also I AM SO SORRY if this is in any way bad?? i'm so rusty... i haven't written in so long but gosh it felt nice to finish a work and i thought it would be a good idea to put it here just because i felt like it akbsuwhs the plot is kinda all over the place i have no idea—anyway, if i missed anything in the warnings, please let me know! i hope you guys will enjoy reading this ♡
word count ☆ 0.98k
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the sight of you riding him was the last thing he expected to enjoy seeing. the way your face has pleasure written all over it, your breasts bouncing with each move your hips make, body trembling from the feeling, and most especially, the way you moaned so lewdly.
he loved it, yet hated you.
he hated your cocky and annoying attitude, always teasing and defying him no matter when or where you were. why do you always think you're better than him? you never will be. well... at least that's what he thinks.
putting you in your place was always the one thing he wanted to do. but as much as he wanted to do so out of anger, the hidden sexual tension between you was no joke. he couldn't avoid it.
he wants to slap you, punch you, hit you in some way. but at the same time he feels like pounding you, pushing your face down into the bed, shutting you up with his fingers in your mouth. no matter how much he thinks you're the absolute worst, he can't deny how attractive you are. and it just fuels his desires even more.
his eyes dart down to watch the way his cock disappears into your pussy, smirking to himself, "such a filthy slut. you take me so well, don't you?" hand reaching behind to grab a fistful of your hair, pulling it back, exposing your neck to him. he doesn't hesitate to lean it and mark you as his.
moving down, he sees your hardened nipples from arousal. his lips wrap around the sensitive area and gently suck on one, tongue flicking on it every now and then. he pulls away and finally lets go of your hair. hands going over to grip your hips now before he spoke up, "getting tired already? gosh, you're weaker than i thought."
you shake your head, about to respond but he doesn't let you. two fingers suddenly filling your mouth, "don't even think of speaking," he whispers and lays you down on your back, "i'm gonna fuck you hard, and you'll take it like a good girl, won't you?"
a red hue spreads across your face. speechless, you nod silently. he smirks and playfully spanks your ass, "atta girl." in one thrust, he fills you up completely. grabbing your legs and bringing them up to your chest. his cock is way deeper inside you in this position and he knows that very well.
capturing your lips in a rough kiss, he began to thrust in and out of you, slow in pace but definitely powerful. gradually getting faster, wilder, with each passing second. your hands come up around your legs to hold them in place, spreading yourself for him.
finally pulling away from the kiss, you try to catch your breath but moans flow out of your lips one after another. to add to it all, he brings his thumb down to rub your clit. it was visible from your body language that you were close to an orgasm. so close.
"you gonna cum around my cock like a good whore, baby?" he chuckles. his other hand comes up to your face, playfully slapping you, "i've always wanted to do that since you're so damn annoying." narrowing his eyes, he glares down at you.
"as if you aren't as well!?" you exclaim back, but it fails—he pinches your clit, drawing out a lewd cry from you. "be quiet and i'll let you cum. come on." you look up at him and make eye contact. he isn't moving anymore, his cock just buried deep inside you. the moment is rather intimate, or so you thought.
"fuck you, scara–"
"you're doing just that and you're still complaining?"
you glare up at him, giving up and letting your head fall back onto the soft pillows, "just fuck me already, fucking hell." you unexpectedly say. he smiles, "gladly."
before you could even register anything else, he was already pounding into you. rough, hard, and fast. giving your clit a sufficient amount of attention as well. all of it was completely overwhelming and all you could do was scream out his name as you came around him. gripping the sheets so tight that your knuckles turned white, your whole body shaking.
"fuck–so good... you feel so fucking good squeezing my cock like that, baby." he groans before finishing inside you. keeping himself in place for a while as he calmed himself down before pulling out gently. he silently watches as your body continues to tremble. scaramouche sighs and gently stimulates your clit, "aww, shh... there there..." the gesture causes you to get overstimulated rather than soothed.
"i'm still hard, just so you know." his voice low as a whisper. "let me just..." flipping you over, he puts you on your hands and knees, entering you from behind and making your body weakly fall flat on the bed. he sighs and just gets on top of you, pushing himself back deep into your wetness.
his bare chest to your back, your body quivering beneath him as he began to thrust into you again. starting at a slow pace that gradually got faster, fucking you properly. leaning down, he whispers right into your ear, "such a perfect cunt you've got, huh?"
you're already so close. the head of his cock brushing over your g-spot every now and then. his body trapping you under him, leaving you with no choice but to take what he gave. drool was already seeping from out of the corner of your mouth from how long you've had your lips apart, occupied in moaning his name over and over again.
as much as he despised you, he could never even think of denying how much he adored the fucked out state you were in. all because of him.
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aninipanin1 · 6 months ago
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I think that Anri begs adult manager! reader to force Ego to eat an actual meal that isn’t those instant noodles
EW, VEGETABLES...?
Notes: I actually love this so much, anon lol
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"Good morning, Anri-san. How may I help you today?"
You greeted your fellow female manager, figure hunched over the washing machine, scrubbing the white linen sheets from the many rooms around the facility, especially the one that legit had an oyster sauce spill, leaving a spot darkened.
Anri gave her a large smile, one that is familiar, at first before her, she reached some sort of 'Eureka' moment, and her smile turned into one of disappointment she did not think of it earlier along with a hint of mischief in it.
"Actually, can you help me with something, Y/n?"
"Oh, of course! What do I do?"
The redhaired manager motioned for her to come closer, to which she followed. Cupping her hand around your ear, Anri whispered the 'task' she wanted you to do.
As she spoke, the wider your eyes became. How will you even pull this off?
"But, Anri-san..! You know how much he loves his noodles...and how he doesn't really like me."
You always thought that Ego Jinpachi, the head and director of the Blue Lock facility, never seemed to like you. He wasn't rude to you (you think because he talked to you the way he did to everyone else), but you can definitely see that he would go out of his way to avoid talking to you, approaching you or anything related to talking with you alone without Anri, unless it was something prefessional and work-related.
He also always scolds you. You know, it was just because of the betterment of the project. But why did he have to scold you for just being around Noel Noa or any of the master strikers? They were the ones handling the improvement of the boys. Of course, you need to be around them! Well, it was one of the many things you noticed, but you digressed. After all, you know you cannot please everyone, especially in a workplace environment.
So, you were a little shocked when Anri tilted her head at you, confused about your claim.
"Ego-san...doesn't like you?"
"Um, isn't it obvious, Anri-san? He doesn't really like talking to me at all, and when you aren't there with us, he will always avoid talking to me even if I try to make casual conversations! Also, he always scolds me for the stupidest reasons! Why does he get mad when I talk to Noa-san, Snuffy-san, Prince-san, or even Lavinho-san, I will never understand! It's my job to make sure that the boys are doing well and I can only make sure of that through the master strikers!"
You did not know when you started ranting, but you did. Anri, who listened to you with open ears, could not help but chuckle on the inside. She felt quite amused and also disappointed at Ego. But, she cannot say she was not surprised. Ego was one, if not the most emotionally constipated person she had ever met. It was not a surprise that he would try to avoid you.
But, why did he have to do all those things? It wasn't helping his cause at all!
'You better thank me for what I am doing, Ego-san.'
"Ego-san! Um..."
You stood there in the office where the said man was watching the many screens, watching over the progress of the players who were all training in their own ways. In your hands was a tray filled with sautéed vegetables, a bowl of rice, and some chicken in a bowl you cooked just for the man.
Even if you think he hates you, you can not just ignore someone who is literally putting their life in danger because they don't want to eat healthy things. You aren't messed up like that!
But, you did not know how to approach this, much less him. How will you even ask him to do this, much less with the strained relationship you two had? This was a really bad idea! Why did Anri have to approach you of all people for this-
"What is it?"
He turned his swivel chair to face you, his eyes a bit lidded to show that he was not that happy for being interrupted.
"I made some extra food, and uh...I thought you may want to have it."
'That's so stupid, Y/n!'
He raised an eyebrow at this, and it did not help that the look on his face showed that he did not approve of eating the pallate on the tray.
"Y/n-chan, you know I don't eat those things."
"I know...! I just didn't want to waste it. Anri-san said she already ate so..."
Ego did not say anything, turning his swivel chair to face the screens again. Just as you were about to give up and leave the room thinking that he would not accept the food at all, he raised his arm and pointed to an empty space on the desk.
"Put it there. Don't blame me if I don't eat it and it becomes rotten."
Blinking at his words, you just nodded your head, a bit dazed that he actually considered even being near the food. You did as he told before bowing and leaving to do your other chores and duties.
Needless to say, when Anri entered Ego's office, she was shocked to see the man munching on a bowl of rice with chicken and vegetables on top. His eyes were still focused on the screen, back hunched in a weird position, but he was indeed eating.
"Did Y/n pass by here..?"
"She did. Dropped this...abomination and her paperwork."
Ego answered, pointing to the food that he called 'abomination,' yet he was still eating the food, cheeks round with food. Anri nodded, yet it was obvious she did not believe the disgusted look in his face to which he only glared at her for.
"You're the one who said it. The facility should not waste food." He pointed his chopstick at her.
"Yeah, yeah. It's totally not because you favour her, definitely not." Anri shrugged, a cheeky smile as she headed out the room once she dropped the paperwork.
'I'm surrounded by simps, haahh...' She inwardly sighed.
ADDITIONAL TIME!
Anri: You like her.
Ego: No, I don't.
Also Ego: *proceeds to hoard every single thing Y/n gave him, yes, even if it was the inkless pen she passed to him to throw in the trash.*
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I'm sorry if this was too short, hahaha. I didn't really know how to go deeper into this. But I hope you loved this!
Blue Lock is WRITTEN by Kaneshiro Muneyuki and ILLUSTRATED by Nomura Yusuke. All credits to the both of them.
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sonofcelluloid · 6 months ago
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Sonofcelluloid’s Top 30(ish) Favorite Devil’s Minion Fics:
In no particular order, this list only includes finished works that are relatively canon compliant (I’ll be making separate lists for AUs and fics in progress.) Anything in italics is a direct quote from the fic or its description. Please remember to check tags and ratings before reading.
You’ll Always Be My Favorite Ghost by lestatslestits: Tales of Armand’s turbo autism as Daniel gets to know and love him. This one is so sweet and had me laughing my ass off.
outcast of all this night by gaypiratedivorce: Modern Devil’s Minion fic of all time. Rewired my brain. "I mean, I don't know how you guys did it in Renaissance Italy, but most people this century get to at least second base before wearing each other's blood around our necks." There’s a part 2: my aid against the boredom of the eternal where they finally hook up. And honestly every fic from this author is a banger.
I’d Break the Back of Love for You by kurow: 70s Armandaniel. A rescue and a sick fic wrapped in one, and I’m a sucker for both.
Like That by GrayGiantess: Fluffy 70s Armandaniel. A tooth achingly sweet first kiss fic, featuring Twinkie’s. Again, every fic from this author is a banger.
The Beginning is the End is the Beginning by trinityofone: Daniel sees a wild vision during his turning. “I deserve this,” Armand said. His hold on Daniel’s throat was almost a caress. “After what I’ve been through, I deserve something of my own, don’t I?”
make a home from a rented house by sleepdeprivedsurgeon: Daniel realizes Armand has never really had a room of his own before. Armand slowly builds his own safe place. Super fluffy autistic Armand stuff. Domestic vampire polycule bonus.
the spiral is unspooling by reedroad: Armand helps Daniel recover their Devil’s Minion years via old video tapes they filmed of their meetings. Absolutely heart wrenching and wonderful and charming and had some of the most jaw dropping plot twists I’ve ever experienced in a DM fic. The last chapter absolutely floored me and rewired my brain forever. May be my #1 fav.
forever’s gonna start tonight by trinityofone: Hate fucking with a happy ending:) Sort of a soulmate fic as well. “I fucking hate you. And you hate me. So something is making us do this.” “I don’t hate you,” Armand pants. “You mean nothing to me. Don't stop.”
care and keeping by katplanet: A surprisingly tender guide for how to step on your boyfriend. Bonus Danlou. Smutty and fluffy and freakayyy. GREAT dialogue. Very funny as well.
hell is: by cannibalenthusiast: Another turning fic. Post Dubai blowout, Armand and Daniel bond over martinis, breakups, and a Survivor marathon. They bang about it. Great ending.
5 Times Daniel Molloy Imagined Killing Marius de Romanus (+1 Time He Actually Did It) by platoapproved: This one is genuinely a masterpiece. Probably my #2 fav. Lots of protective Daniel, some really cool and original vampire-lore stuff, Louis and Lestat being beautifully supportive along with other new side characters. Armand finally gets to process his abuse among allies. A really touching Lestat subplot as well. HEAVY trigger warnings for all Marius related assaults, but obviously we get to watch him die horribly to make up for it:) Absolute banger of an ending, totally sticks the landing.
lesson three: parasitic infections by kanxie: 70s Armandaniel. Armand picks out Alice as a third and does NOT like the way the night progresses. What unfolds is some of the CRAZIEST psychosexual (emphasis on psycho) gremlin Armand shit I’ve ever seen in a fic. So perfectly Armand. Short and sweet, sad ending.
open up your skull, i’ll be there by Anonymous: First time fic. Armand dipped after Daniel’s turning and when he shows up again Daniel ain’t letting him leave. “Your blood is my blood,” Daniel says, and Armand does not flinch. “It’s your blood getting me hard. Your blood that’s pumping through me.” Armand licks his lips, and still doesn’t move. “Please. Armand, Armand, please.” “Beg for it.” “I am begging for it, this is what begging looks like —”
Disintegration by lilacaisle: Daniel goes crazy when Armand locks him in the apartment and tries to burn himself with a cigarette so it will feel like being bitten🙈 Armand does BDSM about it. This one’s actually book Armandaniel but I didn’t notice it until like the third read because it fits show Armandaniel so perfectly.
baby, cry baby by Babeblox: Daniel seeks out Lestat for an interview after Louis’ attack, but he’s being haunted by someone else. Canon divergence. This one legit made me cry. Dark but very sweet. Wild ending.
get in my mind (do you see my heart?) by Marenke: 70s Armandaniel, Armand character study. Armand is pretty sure he and Daniel have never had a problem a little brainwashing couldn’t fix. SICK AND TWISTEDDDDD (affectionate).
The Importance of Being Armand by Siria: Daniel and Armand talk about the power of naming. "If you can imagine a different set of possibilities for me as a vampire, ever think of what you could come up with for yourself, if you put your mind to it?"
Bumpin' That (Bumpin' That Bumpin' That Bumpin' That) by TheAngelsAreWatching: Daniel and Lestat are fuck buddies. They are on a tour bus a la Word Tour. They do coke. They try to bang. And then Armand stops time and walks in. Armandaniel fuck crazy style. Pure filth (affectionate).
Run, Arun! by TheNightColors: Autistic Armand, character study. Daniel learns it was considered a “crime” to turn Armand due to his “mental retardation”. Armand explains what it was like to be an autistic child in the sixteenth century, and an autistic adult for 500 years after. Heavy stuff. Trigger warning for all things relating to Amadeo’s past and for the internalized ableism instilled in Armand by his upbringing.
a haunting just for company by valkyrisms: Post Dubai blowout but pre Daniel’s turning, Armand crashes on Daniel’s couch. A modern Devil’s Minion fic for the ages. These weirdos love each other so bad. Some really memorable tender scenes. This one’s a fan favorite. “You’re fond of me.” “You’re a nuisance.”
The Company of Monsters by ruiqi: A full deconstruction of Marius’ abuse from Armand’s pov as he struggles to keep old patterns from repeating with Daniel. Overall I think this is the most realistic depiction of what it would be like for Armand to come to terms with his abuse in the modern day, especially regarding Daniel’s involvement. He’s totally out of his depth but wants so badly to help. This one made me SOB. It’s honestly a really tough read, but beautifully done. “You said, last night, that he wanted an angel,” says Daniel, “but no one's an angel, Armand. That wasn't fair to you. Besides, who would want an angel when they could have you?” “No,” Armand says. “No, you can’t say that.” “You can’t fucking stop me,” says Daniel. And it isn’t tagged, but this one is incredible autistic Armand representation. Probably my #3 fav.
Smart Boy by heliza24: Just a really good 70s Devil’s Minion era explanation of the events leading up to Armand’s decision to take Daniel’s memories away. Quite a bit of infidelity stuff in this one. Also delves a lot into Daniel’s family history, and an emotional affair is established between them long before they actually hook up. Very emotional. Heartbreaking last chapter.
We Dared Eternity and Won by faerywhimsy: A 70s Devil’s Minion era telling of the four good years they had before everything imploded. Louis has somewhat of a distant obsession with Daniel in this and so is very involved in Armand’s decisions regarding him. Favorite scene is when Armand saves Daniel from a hotel fire and the near loss devastates him because it makes him realize he’s in love with Daniel.
reprise. by SheOfBadIdeas: In Dubai, Daniel demands Armand show him the memories he stole. Armand relays the tale of their romance, but Daniel is begrudged to give Armand the satisfaction of giving in to it. That doesn’t last long;)
Waiting by bandedbulbussnarfblat: 70s fic. Daniel is living with Alice and hasn’t seen Armand in two months. He gets a call from Armand, who just got a proposal from Marius asking him to be his companion again. “I told him I couldn't go back. That I was waiting for you.” Daniel sucks in a sharp breath. Fuck. Armand's voice sounds almost wet, strained and raspy. He finally sounds as vulnerable as Daniel always wanted to see him be. “Should I keep waiting for you, Daniel?” (It’s just banger after banger with this author too.)
The Monster of my Memories by GrayGiantess: In Dubai, Daniel has just remembered his relationship with Armand and he’s PISSED. Armand gladly reminds him he’s waited 40 years for Daniel, he doesn’t mind waiting a little while more, and he’s not so sure Daniel has the same conviction🙈 Phenomenal subby old man Daniel material.
Delicate Machinery by Lilac Tinsel: An in depth look at the 70s love affair that neither man ever saw coming, in all its complicated glory. Really dives into the psychological consequences of Armand’s constant rejections. Amazing take on what the actual memory alteration would look like. The part that broke me: “I’m sorry for– for all of it. I didn’t realize how much I took. I just… wanted to stop thinking for a moment.” Armand blinks slowly and his eyebrows knit together. His voice is small but steady. “Did you take the drugs so you wouldn’t feel me anymore?”
You Taste Like Suburbia by CannibalGender: This is the only unfinished work I’m putting on this list because it’s so fucking good as is and gave me chills when I read it. It’s the 80s, Armand, famously normal about his partners' families, haunts the Molloys. I absolutely love Alice in this. Paints such an intriguing picture of what these years might have looked like from an “outside” pov.
Two parter I’ll chew you up and I’ll spit you out and Oh dear diary, I met a boy by weathermood: Loumandaniel in Dubai, set just after the season 1 finale. Asks, what if Daniel doesn’t want to remember? An exploration of identity while Louis and Armand try to persuade Daniel to allow his memories of their past relationship to be restored. Explores dreams and memories beautifully and with delightful humor. Classic unhinged Armand.
138 lbs, for the metrically challenged by hummingbeeoOo: Fluffy and funny. After Daniel’s turning and subsequent hunting down of his maker, they’re shacked up and happier than ever, but a little something from the interview has kept nagging at Daniel. Or: there is exactly zero way a beanpole like Armand weighed a measly 62.5 kilograms a day in his adult life. The end of this fic had me kicking my feet and giggling. This whole series is great tbh.
This list is my pride and joy. Thank you to the anon who asked for recs<3 Feel free to share your own favorites in the reblogs:)
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4ruits · 17 days ago
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𐙚 : dubcon & noncon photo taking.
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you hate nerdjo because he walks around so cockily thinking he knows everything. always a willing participant in discussions and always knocking people down a peg when someone makes a mistake during a lecture. he's such a cocky asshole and someone needs to burst his bubble.
you've tried to do it by engaging in in-class debates that the professor would begin. it always brought the two of you toe to toe as the students would watch in amusement to see how this all plays out.
gojo wins. he always wins.
you don't know how to knock him down, and as time progresses, you don't think anyone ever will.
until your professor assigns the two of you to work together on an assignment. two of his smartest students in the class, he wanted the two of you to work together to present something at a seminar for students interested in biochemistry and the advancements made because of technology. however, the professor feared that because of your mutually shared feud between each other, it would alter what could be tremendous results. "just── please, you two... find a way to cordially work together."
the both of you instantaneously agreed because neither of you was going to turn down an opportunity like this. however, the moment the two of you left the room, you were both back to square one.
gojo scoffs. "i understand why he chose me, but you?" he snorts. "you can barely keep up with me in class during discussions. he should've chosen someone else."
"you must've been coddled as a child," you sneer. "it'd explain why you have the attitude of a bitch."
the arguing didn't stop there, becoming your professor's nightmare when the two of you can barely get anything done because gojo's critiques on your work is so harsh and he won't accept anything you've done.
you're about to head to his place the fourth time this week to go over things. hopefully, he won't knitpick everything and finally accept what you've got. when you knock on the door, however, there's no answer. again, you knock, but before you can even try for a third time, you're shifting for the spare key he showed to you and using it to unlock the door.
you don't hear anything when you get inside. "gojo!"
nothing. "gojo!"
you huff in annoyance, knowing that he's here because he texted you half an hour ago to tell you to meet him here. heading into the direction of his room, that's when you start to hear it. the moans and the breathy panting for air.
"shit," you curse under your breath. contemplating on turning around and going home, your body makes the decision for you by heading closer towards the bedroom door instead. cracked open, you can see it── you can see him. your eyes widen.
back against the bed and legs hiked up, gojo's knees nearly hit his chest. he's lying on a towel, and his wet glistening skin indicates a recent shower. in between his legs, he's pumping himself, and from your view, you have the perfect view of his puckered asshole and his pale skin. you'd be lying if you were to tell yourself you're not even slightly aroused.
"fuck," the two of you curse at the same time. you shouldn't be watching this, you know, but you're so entranced, and your body eggs you to open the door wider before you can properly think. in the mere seconds, you conjure up a plan. a perfect plan to do what you've always wanted── to be on top.
he doesn't see you, too focused on himself to take any notice. and you're so gentle despite the venom being spewed across your mind when you approach him. when you're so close, you contemplate chickening out, but your inner voice speaks, don't back out now. take control of the situation.
"so, this is the type of shit you're into?" gojo jumps at the sound of your voice, trying to collect himself from such a vulnerable and albeit pathetic position. but, you grab a hold of his thigh, stopping him. "no, no, i didn't tell you to stop."
gojo's still tense, sapphire eyes throwing daggers at you. if he wanted to, he could easily overpower you, but he submits. "you gonna make fun of me?"
"i should," you smile smugly. "you'd like that, huh?"
"fuck you," he grumbles, rolling his eyes.
"soon enough," you smile. "but open your mouth first."
eyes widening, he stumbles on his words. "i──" ultimately stumped, his mouth falls open, and that's when you pull out your phone from your back pocket. snapping a photo of him quickly before retracting your hand from a ready to fight gojo, you beam happily. "blackmail!"
"you leak that and i'll sue you," he threatens.
"then, stop being such a jackass," you frown. "having me change and rewrite the paper every second."
"but──"
"what?" you go to cup his balls. "you don't wanna come?──" gojo shudders. "── the professor said we need to work on it together and i'd be damned if you did all the work."
with a pause to contemplate, you take the moment to run your fingers down his shaft. eyes ogling his length, he's so long, you can't help but think. you can feel a slight twitch and you see his adam’s apple bob. "fine. just── fuck ──make me come, so we can finish this assignment."
you smile wickedly before your palm wraps around his length, making him shiver under your touch as glossy pre leaks from his tip. fixing yourself on the bed, you press down on his legs to keep him still as your wrist travels a steady motion. your heart races watching gojo's face twist and contort all because of you. the corners of your lips curve delightfully as you continue to jerk him off.
"you talk such a big game in class," you taunt, "but deep down you're such a pathetic little bitch boy, right, gojo?"
when he doesn't respond, you squeeze around his shaft. "right, gojo?"
"yes," he cries. "fuck! keep going!"
he mores and writhes from the pleasure, his balls tightening up as he feels his orgasm approaching. cock twitching in your hands, yoyr eyes beam in excitement.
"i──"
"come, gojo," you breathe. "drink it all up."
when he comes, he tastes himself on his tongue, splashes of his white seed splashing on his face. his stomach clenches as you keep going, making sure to drain him empty before you finally release his legs and they fall on the bed. he pants, licking at the corner of his mouth when you shift on the bed. pulling off your pants, you rid yourself of your jeans and leave on your underwear.
"what're you doing?"
you hop onto him, and gojo instinctively grips your waist. you grin, "you wanted to fuck me, remember?"
by the time the two of you are done fucking and finally got some actual work done, it's dark out. collecting your stuff, you turn back to gojo. "by the way, i wouldn't have leaked the picture. i took that for personal reasons."
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cinnamorollcrybaby · 9 months ago
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Couldddd you please write something with hiromi?? I'd appreciate itttt so muchh :)
At Law
Tags: Hiromi Higuruma x fem!Reader, modern!au, nsfw, mdni, academic rivals, enemies to lovers, hate fucking, unhinged!hiromi, depictions of violence including murder
Synopsis: Being the state’s district attorney was your dream job. After years of law school and hard work, you were finally appointed the job and allowed to represent the state in court. You singlehandedly decided which cases to prosecute and who to bring to justice. When your old academic rival, Hiromi, shows up as a defense attorney in court one evening, you know he’s going to give you a hard trial… and a hard fuck.
An: Anything for you nepobaby :)) Hope you enjoy this. I swear I'm going to make these shorter every time, but then, I start writing and literally can't stop.
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You two have been chasing each other for the longest time.
It started in law school. You don't exactly remember how it happened, but slowly over time, you and Hiromi began playing your little academic race.
Both of you were brilliant, quick, and determined. Honestly, you two were like a professor's dream to have.
You found yourself studying longer, committing to all-nighters just to read over several codes of law and past cases in the court. All of it just to score a little bit higher than him on a test.
But dammit, he was faster than you when answering questions the professor proposes. His photographic memory serves him well as he's able to distinctly remember what code a law comes from and where the code is at in the Code of Federal Regulations.
Don't even get me started on how mock trials went. The professor would actually have to stop pairing you two against each other because it would become so toxic and brutal between the two.
As law school progressed, the workload just got worse. The school expected you to complete assignments, study for the bar, and take on unpaid internships. You were a slave for your degree.
Hiromi wasn't immune to those types of pressures either, and as much as he hated to admit it, study partners help retain information better. It would help effectively consume the source material in half the time. Unfortunately, the rest of his peers were just so beneath him...
Well, besides you.
All-nighters weren't lonely anymore. You and Hiromi would drink enough caffeine to kill an elephant and go through weeks worth of content in a night.
"You know... the release of endorphins can help concentration and reduce stress, thus helping students study." Hiromi said one early morning.
It was around four a.m, and you two were covering the petty crimes section. To say it was incredibly boring was an understatement. Students like you and Hiromi would never represent or prosecute clients in petty crimes. You two were destined for so much more.
"What are you suggesting, Hiro?" You ask before a small yawn escapes your mouth. You hadn't even looked up from your book.
"I'm suggesting that we help each other by taking a quick break." He responds as he shoves the book away from your lap. Your surprised eyes look up at his tired ones, and he cups your cheeks before he leans down to kiss you.
You would walk into class sore the next day. As soon as the adrenaline from one round wore off, you two were gunning for the next.
Your study sessions continued on and so did your competitiveness.
When you scored one point higher than him on the bar, he hate fucked you until morning.
Then, he made it his mission to surpass you everywhere else too. Recruiters and attorneys personally from different law firms were ringing Hiromi's phone constantly.
You genuinely believed that he would take the calls on speakerphone just to fucking spite you. You could hear the lawyers on the phone praise him so highly, practically begging for him to come practice at their firm.
Of course, you were getting some recruitment opportunities too, but it was still somehow harder for women to find jobs in the criminal justice field than it was for men. You also hadn't been selling yourself to these firms as much as he was because you had your mind set on working for the state. You wanted to be a prosecutor for the district attorney.
The icing on the cake was when you two were having one of your "study breaks" (aka Hiromi had you bent over your bed, and he was delivering the deepest, most toe curling backshots known to man), and he took a phone call from the district attorney's office.
His hand covered your mouth as he continued to thrust roughly into you while the man on the phone offered Hiromi a job.
"Hm? Oh, thank you for the opportunity." He graciously spoke over the phone as he was absolutely bullying your insides. Your stomach coiled from anger and arousal. You fucking hated him so much. "I'm weighing out all of my options now, but I'll have an answer for you by the end of the week, sir."
After more pleasantries, he hung up the phone and bent over to where he could whisper in your hear. "Hear that, little dove? I'm getting job opportunities from the state while you're under me getting ruined."
"You know, I'll probably be too busy from here on out to play this childish games with you." Thrust. "That'll be too bad, won't it?" Thrust. "Can't say I'll miss you though." Thrust. "Maybe this pretty cunt, but that'll probably be it." Thrust. "Better make this last one count, shouldn't we?" Thrust.
Oh, and he made good on his word. Your entire body ached after he made you finish for the nth time that evening. "I'll see you around, little dove." He whispered in your ear before pressing a kiss to your cheek and leaving your dorm.
He made good on his word about that too. He never returned to your dorm. Sure, you two were graduating in two days, but some small part of you thought he'd might come over for a celebration.
No, he left you behind. He left you behind. You lost.
The anger burned hot for a few months as you gathered barrings after law school, especially when you'd see his name in the papers.
Defense Attorney Higuruma gets a non-guilty verdict for alleged drug trafficker!
Higuruma sways jury in closing argument, providing the most gut-wrenching speech!
Higuruma, Higuruma, Higuruma.
He was a fucking sensation in the criminal justice field, and his name left a sour taste in your mouth.
The anger only started to subside once you landed your dream job after a long internship. You were finally a prosecutor in a major circuit court in the crimes division.
Hiromi's name finally fled from your brain as you started to flood the newspapers.
Prosecutor helps put away notorious serial killer for life.
Cartel drug lord behind bars after district attorney helps deliver a guilty verdict for over 32 charges.
You finally felt like you hadn't been left behind. You were living the life you wanted to live ever since you were little. Did you imagine you'd be married by now? Yeah, sure. You just... hadn't met the right one yet.
Dating was hard while maintaining a professional career. You had to be extremely choosey for one. It would be scandalous to see a prosecutor dating someone with a criminal record.
And the men were sweet, don't get me wrong. They'd take you on nice dates, write you pitiful love letters, and treat you like a princess... They were all so collectively boring, especially in bed.
You'd tell them! You'd give them incredibly detailed instruction to be rough and mean to you, but they'd always laugh and make some excuse for not wanting to hurt you. Ugh.
Maybe you were ruined by Hiromi... because the only thing that got you off nowadays was the thought of him whispering hateful words into your ear while pounding himself into you with little concern or remorse.
Slowly, the gifts would start appearing.
A bouquet of white roses sitting on your desk. Do you miss me, LD?
You thought it was a simple mistake or a sick prank from one of the criminals you help lock away. You would quietly dispose of the gifts until the slowly became more alarming.
Miss your sweet sounds, LD. An audio recording of you moaning on a tape recorder played.
Who are you trying to look nice for, LD? None of those men could treat you like I did. Pictures of you going out on a date.
I'll take care of them for you. Don't worry your pretty little head, LD. A dead dove.
This was enough to get a harassment and stalking charge, but you didn't want to concern the local police. For one, you knew how lousy the police were when it came to crimes like this from working alongside them. They were honestly an embarrassment. For two, you didn't want this getting out to the public because then copy cats would start up.
You tried investigating on your own, but you came up to a dead end every time. The way this person called you LD made your head spin. That's not even your initials, but the gifts were certainly intended for you.
The only refuge for you was when you were in a court room. You felt safe and protected. A stalker of this degree wouldn't be ballsy enough to confront you in a courtroom while you're surrounded by police and bailiffs constantly.
Your refuge was short-lived by catching a glimpse of a familiar face in court one evening.
He looked as handsome as he did in law school. Hiromi's tired eyes met yours, and he almost immediately cracked a smile as he approached you during recess.
"Well look at you, dove." He smiled as he looked down at you. Hiromi's dark hair laid messily on the top of his head, and he was wearing a full business suit that framed his body nicely. "I see the district attorney's office settled for the second best option after I turned them down. Good for them."
He was still as arrogant and competitive as ever, making your heart flutter like it did back in law school. "Very funny, Hiro." You roll your eyes as you stand to look up at him.
"It's all harmless jokes. I promise. I'm proud of you, really." He assures as his eyes wander your body for just a moment.
You're not use to his praise. Normally, you're not the type to enjoy it, but hearing those words made you clench around nothing as your stomach swirled with butterflies.
"Thanks... I've heard good things about you as well.." You murmur quietly, suddenly losing all your nerve. "So, are you representing someone?"
"I am. I didn't just come here to watch you for fun. Though, I would've had I known you were such a big shot." He nudges your arm gently, causing you to laugh softly. "I'm representing a young man charged with murder. I'm sure you heard about it. Big news all over the television."
"Who was the victim?" You ask as you flip through your case files. If this was a first setting, surely you wouldn't go to trial today, but the thought of going to trial against Hiromi made your heart pound with excitement. Not many lawyers gave you too much trouble during court, but Hiromi... he would be a good match.
"They can't identify the victim. Male, John Doe, early twenties. That's all the information the cops have." He explains, and you start skimming through the case file quickly. It's astonishing that the police made an arrest when there was hardly a body to work from.
"Huh." You muse quietly as you look through the crime scene photos and pictures of the defendant's hands covered in soot from a fire. The victim had been burned.
"I'll be making a motion to dismiss this case based on a lack of substantial evidence linking my defendant to the body. Just a heads up." He then winks at you and walks away from your bar as the judge comes back and sits on the bench.
It seems as though you and Hiromi will have one last back and forth like old times.
When his case gets called before the judge, Hiromi takes the pleasure in speaking first. His client is handcuffed, sitting down next to him. The defendant was young, maybe nineteen. The evidence supporting his conviction was weak, but it was still there. Convincing a jury to convict him will be tough, and that's if the judge doesn't dismiss the charges outright.
After a long, drawn out argument between you and Hiromi about the proponderance of evidence, the judge decides to not dismiss the case.
"In that case, your honor, we would like to request a hearing today." Hiromi speaks with such confidence as he stands before the judge.
"Your honor, the state hasn't had adequate time to prepare for a hearing, and this is first setting. We'd like to request a reset date to prepare our defense." You immediately follow up as you also stand up.
"Your honor, my client has been incarcerated for over twenty-five days for a charge that has flimsy evidence at best. He has a right to a speedy trial." Hiromi rebuttals.
"Enough. We'll have a trial today whether the state is ready to proceed or not." The judge decides. Wonderful.
The trial is as painful as you imagined it to be. The evidence is flimsy, and Hiromi is practically bullying the witnesses on the stand, and when it's your turn for redirect, he practically bullies you with objection after objection.
"And what did the police-"
"Objection hearsay." Hiromi stands from his chair and eyes you with that cold stare of his.
"Your honor, I haven't even finished my question without the defense counsel butting in." You argue to the judge.
"Overruled. Counsel, let her finish." The judge warns.
Your head is practically throbbing by the end of it. The jury deliberates for two hours before coming back with the sentence. You tried your hardest and made good work with what evidence you had.
"On the charge of first-degree murder, we the jury find the defendant... not guilty."
Dammit. Hiromi won once again.
"On the charge of abuse of a corpse, we the jury find the defendant... guilty. On the charge of tampering with physical evidence, we the jury find the defendant... guilty. On the charge of arson, we the jury find the defendant... guilty."
He didn't win.
"On these charges, I will impose a sentence of twenty-five years in the Fuchu Prison with the possibility of parole after ten years." The judge sentences before whacking his gavel down.
You let out an exhausting sigh as you slowly gather your things after court adjourns. Today was likely the hardest day in your career, and you can't help but think about that young nineteen-year-old who won't see freedom until he's twenty-nine.
Hiromi approaches you after the courtroom is completely empty.
"You seem tired, dove." He muses as he loosens his tie from around his neck. He'd never admit it, but you absolutely gave him a run for his money.
"It's not everyday someone gives me that much trouble in court." You softly laugh as you look up at him. You feel your cheeks warm as you realize how close he is to you.
"Yeah? Did it bring back old memories?" He steps closer as his hand slowly reaches up to cup your cheek.
"Hm? Of me winning our mock trials?" You ask with a cheeky grin, and his grip tightens a bit.
"I distinctly remember our record being 15-13 with me having 15 wins." He replies as he leans down to you. He remembers the score you two kept from back in law school?
"You must be still sore about me outscoring you on the bar if you kept up with our scores from mock trials."
"Mmm, quite the contrary actually, you've always been my favorite opponent, even if you piss me off." He replies as he leans down towards you and presses his lips against yours.
The kiss was full of everything you could ever imagine: heat, lust, a hint of resentment towards each other. Before you know it, you're pressed against the table as Hiromi's hands roam your body like he's in a frenzy.
"Hiro.." You moan as he kisses down your neck roughly biting on your flesh. "My office.." You whine, trying to get him to ease up on you just long enough so you two could get out of the courtroom.
"And if I say no, little dove?" He whispers in your ear as his hand slips underneath your dress with such ease. "You'd let me take you right here, wouldn't you?"
"Hiro~" You whine in a breathy tone as his fingers trace around your clit like they did so long ago.
"That's not an answer, little dove." He demands as he applies more pressure. "I asked if you'd let me fuck you on this bar until you forgot your own name."
"Yes-!" You gasp as his fingers skillfully play with your most sensitive area.
"That's what i figured. You were always such a slut back then too. Somethings never change, hm?" He muses as he goes back to sucking and kissing on your neck. His fingers tease near your entrance, but they slowly trail back up to your clit.
"You're lucky I respect you enough." He growls lowly before he removes his hand. "Lead the way to your office."
As soon as you two are behind closed doors in your modest office, clothes are being thrown onto the floor, moans and small whispers of sweet nothings were exchanged. You could quite literally feel your heartbeat fluttering deep inside your cunt.
He gently nudges you to lay down on the leather couch you had in your office for the late nights you spent reviewing evidence. Your skin connects with the soft leather as he gets between your legs. "I wonder if you still taste the same, little dove."
His tongue gently laps at you, and he immediately hums with satisfaction. "Somehow sweeter, actually." He answers his own question as flattens his tongue and licks you from entrance to clit, savoring your fluids of arousal on his tongue.
Your hands find his hair, and you gently tug on it as he helps himself to your wetness. He takes his time, lapping at you slowly while gently suckling on the small bundle of nerves. Sometimes you swear he's spelling his name into your cunt with his tongue before he shoves his tongue directly inside you, drinking your nectar straight from the source.
"H-hiro~!" You whimper as you try to shuffle your hips away. The stimulation was too much to handle.
"Don't try to run from me, little dove." He grunts as he wraps his arms around your thighs and pulls you right back down onto his mouth.
His nose bumps into your clit as you subconsciously ride his face, searching for release. "Yeeahh, there we gooo. There's my little dove.. bein' such a slut." He coos as he buries his face deeper into your core.
His entire face is damp from your delicious juices. He's such a messy eater, getting it all over his chin and nose. His tired eyes flutter up to look at you as you're on the crux of your orgasm.
"Cum on my face, little dove. Let me have you." He instructs before lapping at your cunt like a starved man.
Your voice goes high pitched and breathy as you grab onto his hair tightly, forcing him in even more before you finish all over his mouth. He gratefully continues to run his tongue along your folds until your legs are trembling on his shoulders.
You softly pant as you relax into the couch. You hadn't had an orgasm like that in so long. You had almost forgotten how they feel.
Hiromi looks up at you with a confident smirk and an intoxicated gaze. "Seems like you missed me, little dove."
"Please, I only missed when you're too preoccupied to run your mouth." You retort with a grin.
"Is that so?" He questions as he pulls down his boxers, and his length springs up from the constraints of the fabric. You tug your bottom lip between your teeth as you're reminded of how big he is.
As if on muscle memory, you turn to get in doggy position because that was his and your position of choice back in college, but he grabs your thighs and prevents you from moving.
"Nuh uh. You're gonna look at me when I take you this time." He grins as he positions himself between your thighs. He fists his length a few times before slowly dragging his fat tip up and down your sopping wet folds, savoring the feeling with a small groan. "I wanna see the tears in your pretty eyes, little dove."
You're about to argue and protest about the tears part, but he's quick to shut you up by forcing his length into you all at once. Hiromi's not only long, but he's very girthy, stretching you so deliciously. White hot pain courses through you as your nails dig into the couch.
"Ah-! F-fuck!" You curse as you try to get use to his size.
"Mmm~ you're tight, dove. How long has it been for you, hm? Surely you've fucked someone since college, unless you've been hopelessly waiting for me." He grins as his hips are slow. He allows you the space to almost get use to him before he shoves into you aggressively, making you see stars.
"Ngh... p-probably like.. uh.. oh god, six months?" You answer as you stutter over your words. Your last hookup had ghosted you after you slept with him. Though, it didn't really bother you. He wasn't good in bed at all, and he called you crazy for asking him to be mean to you during the deed.
Hiromi simply smirks down at you, proud of himself for how fast he can make you a mess underneath him.
"Oh, you poor thing... hah.. No one can take care of this pussy like I can, hm?" He taunts as his hands grab ahold of your hips. His eyes are fixated on where you two are connects. He loves watching his length sink inside you.
Your warm wet entrance only serves to suck him in further, causing him to groan and continue his deep, ruthless pacing.
"N-no..." You're not even able to deny it to him and play hard to get. No one comes close to making you feel as good as he does.
His hips snap forward harshly, fucking you deeper into the black leather of the couch beneath you. Your entire body jolts with each rough thrust.
"Only I'm good for you, isn't that right little dove? You're mine, aren't you?" He asks as his hand reaches up and wraps around your throat, gently applying pressure. His eyes are now staring deeply into yours, waiting for an answer.
"Fuck, Hiro.." You whine, unable to commit to saying you're his. He applies a bit more pressure with his thumb and fingertips.
"I asked you a question." He grits as he slams back into you at a dizzying rate. "Are you mine?"
"Oh~ fuck.. I-" You can barely get a word out as he's ruthlessly abusing your little cunt. This was the roughness you had begged all those other guys for. "Yes-! God, fuck, yes." You cry as you feel your stomach clenching with the burning passion of another orgasm.
"I'm gonna let you in on a little secret because you're mine now, dove." He mumbles lowly as he leans closer towards you. His hips keep up with his rhythm as his face is close to your ear. "That guy you sent to prison today was innocent of all counts."
Your hands reach up and hold onto his back muscles as he's rutting deep inside of you, reaching new places with his new position.
"What-? Hiro... I don't.."
"You sent an innocent man to prison, little dove. Doesn't that bother you? You're sick just like me." He continues on, making you feel all confused.
"How... ah~ how do you know he's innocent?" You ask as your eyebrows furrow. Your hands search his back, and your legs wrap around him as if you're hugging him.
"Because I did it." He growls into your ear. "That pathetic excuse for a man wasn't good enough for you, LD."
Chills immediately shoot through your body from him calling you by those damn initials. LD. You cling to him for a moment, unsure of what to even feel or say. His hips continue to rut inside of you.
"What's the matter, little dove?"
LD. Little dove. You squeeze your eyes shut as you finally piece everything together. Your last hookup didn't disappear. Your stalker, Hiromi, took care of him just like he promised he would.
For some sick reason, your stomach continues to clench as he's rocking back and forth. Your eyes meet his.
"Hiro... that's so.." You can't get the words out before you're finishing all over his cock with a high-pitched squeal.
Hiromi grins wildly as he watches you come undone from your orgasm. "My little dove is just as sick as I am, isn't she?" He coos before he leans back up.
His hips starts to drill into you mercilessly, not giving you a chance to catch your breath or even think. "Oh, fuck!" He curses as he's chasing his high deep inside you. “Mmnph~ gonna cum inside you and really make you mine.” He coos as his hips start moving sloppily.
You know it’s so wrong and taboo, but you couldn’t help but feel your arousal start building again. He just confessed to you about a serious crime, yet your pussy was still soaked, making the most delicious plap! plap! plap! noises as he pounded into you.
“Fuuuuck~” He groans as you feel his thick length twitching inside of you as he spills deep into your womb.
For a moment, you’re completely speechless. Hiromi softly pants as he presses small kisses into your collarbones. “‘m sorry. I had to do it, dove. I couldn’t let him get close to you.” He murmurs quietly. “Only I get to hear your sweet sounds. No one knows you better than me.”
Taking a deep breath, you realize that if this ever gets brought to light, you and Hiromi are going down for life. You gently nuzzle your face into his neck. “Hiro, you’re insane.”
“I know that, I do.” His voice is so sweet, cooing to you. “But we can get away with it, even if we’re miraculously caught.” He presses a sweet kiss to your temple.
Well, a year later, and the two renowned lawyers are married. At least you didn’t marry someone with a criminal record ;)
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clickityweasel · 2 months ago
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cheapskate bleach tutorial
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Sticking it under a readmore but this is how i make my shirts etc for like a fiver's worth of materials. I am far from being an expert btw im just playing with chemicals. also probably do this in a ventilated area or something
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You will need:
Bleach (I use thick toilet bleach it's like 80p)
The thing you want to bleach onto (In this case, a tote bag for a friend. usually i thrift old black shirts.) You should do a patch test before any real bleaching -- dab a tiny bit on the inside of a hem somewhere before you commit. I don't show that below because i forgot to do it but you should. You should ALSO iron the thing before you bleach it. So it's flat. Do as I say not as I do etc.
Something to put inside / between your garment and the table (Asda brand weetabix box babyyy)
Paintbrush (Mine is from a multipack from Poundland. I also accidentally left it in bleach last time and it kind of dissolved so I had to cut off the most egregious of the stray bristles.)
Chalk (For snacking) (I'm joking please don't eat the chalk) (I only have big pavement chalk, again, from Poundland, but you can get a good point with a craft knife)
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Step one: move the cat
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Step two: insert cereal box into / behind the thing you are bleaching.
Step three: chalk on your design. this is the logo of a wine brand i have never tried but i like the snail. It can be super rough or very precise, whichever helps you know where to put your lines.
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As you can tell it's easy to move stuff and redo it by just smudging the chalk away, or, worst case scenario, giving it a wash. Though that sucks if you're impatient like me bc you do NOT want to bleach this while it's wet. Once you're happy with your design, smack it around a bunch to take off most of the chalk, so you wind up with a vague outline. I didn't get a pic of this stage but here's what the iasip one looked like:
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Step four: Acquire your bleach and put it in the special bleach jar your hosuemates labelled so you would stop drinking normal water out of it. Accept that Nyx hates you for not letting her drink it.
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Step five: Go for it man. The bleach is kinda goopy so don't expect it to come out like paint, but it does mean that you can control the line crispness and width quite easily depending on how hard you press the brush down. I find it really helps for stuff like serif fonts.
You can dilute your bleach with water, which can help it get into all the little crevices esp if your fabric is a little bumpy, but do another small patch test before committing to anything on the main piece, because some fabrics absolutely suck up water and your lovely crispy lines will blow out like an old tattoo. don't do it. Unless you want that look, in which case get silly with it
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The other weird thing abt it is obviously that you can't see what you painted right away, it takes a couple seconds to show up, so it's a pretty slow process. The fabric will first go darker where you painted, then lighten from orange to a pale yellow over about 30 seconds. DON'T go "this bleach aint shit" and paint over it to make it lighten faster -- overbleaching it can weaken the fabric and make it tear.
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Tragic.
Here are some progress shots of the snail! When you're finished, you should wait for it to develop properly, but it depends how light you want it to be. I let the lines sit for a while before doing the details, and then washed it a bit prematurely so they'll stay a little darker. For nice pale yellow you want to wait around an hour.
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Step six: drown her
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Nice cold water, wash out all the remaining bleach and chalk. I chucked it in the wash for ten minutes because it's a weird shape and size to wash in the sink and I'm a lazy bastard. but handwashing works just as well.
Step seven: revel in your new bootleg merch. You made that. You did that. thrive. go forth and make weird shit.
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kinichval · 6 months ago
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all at once, everything is different
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he finds no meaning in celebrating the day of his birth (or creation), yet this year he finds himself whispering a wish — please don't ever become a stranger whose laugh he can recognize anywhere.
content. wanderer x rtawahist!fem!reader, wanderer is addressed as hat guy, reader can see aranara, not dating but clearly in love ykwim, one (1) kiss, hat guy hates his birthday, not-so-mean because his soft spot is showing lol, mediocre writing, slight angst if u squint. | 3.5k words
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“hat guy, you have a visitor!”
the said man groans and shuts his eyes, displeased with the interruption. if ignoring the knocks were not enough to convey the message, then he will not be liable for his harsh tone over the unwanted company.
except, well, the visitor on the other side of the door happened to be his new friend — durin.
wait, what the fuck is he doing with nahida?
“hat guy!” the little dragon's enthusiasm explodes across the room. he quickly flies over to the indigo-haired scholar, taking a peek at the paperwork on his desk. “what are you doing?” his curiosity is rather adorable, though hat guy would not let that thought slip out his lips (and hopefully the dendro archon wouldn't attempt to read his mind).
“i'm working on a new thesis.” he simply responds, durin lets out an innocent ‘woah’ although he knows he doesn't fully grasp the concept. nahida giggles; the thesis proponent has been cooped up in this room for days, it's a given that scholarly papers and academic writing generally takes months before completion, but it's also clear to her that his response was merely an excuse.
“let's go out, hat guy!” durin initiates, flipping in the air as excitement rushes through his little body as he expects his first friend to agree — only to frown when hat guy scoffs, “i'm busy right now. let's plan another time.” hat guy hopes the compromise would convince his dragon friend to leave him alone and so will the dendro archon.
but no, both of them are determined to reign victorious against his convictions.
hat guy knew what day is it today, he sighs heavily, eager to stay put in his lair doing whatever academic duty there is just to avoid the light of day and utmostly reject the idea of celebration.
it's as if a simple greeting of ‘happy birthday’ bears no sense of something, it feels awkward to receive such words when he feels nothing about the beginning of his existence. was he supposed to say ‘thank you’ when in the first place it's an unsolicited message?
one of these days, he's sure to receive a smack on the back of his head if this attitude continues.
(he'll just protect his head then.)
(unless the prevailing lord of sumeru casts a more perilous punishment when he wears her patience thin.)
durin's crimson eyes dulls, the drop in his float and lowered head presents his broken heart, “allow me to go through your progress and i'll leave my own criticisms, take it as a partial checking. we wouldn't want to finish a thesis then realize the whole paper is wrong, would we?” nahida suggests, her eyes round and pleading. hat guy stares down at his desk, almost praying to some other god — probably the anemo one, though he doesn't have much faith in the freedom archon — to make nahida and durin realize that he is unavailable at the moment.
“come on, hat guy, today looks like a good—” nahida's words are immediately cut off when hat guy finally looks at their gazes, “fine!” he abruptly stands up with his palms on the desk, the split second of his widened eyes being enough evidence for nahida to see his true feelings without needing to use her mind-reading prowess.
“really?!” durin's eyes sparkle and wings flap in triumph, hat guy groans in defeat, and nahida smiles brightly. “but i'll decide when the day is over.” his tone is as cold as his color palette, but durin does not complain about his condition, his little cheers soften hat guy's bleak exterior.
hat guy detests walking around the heart of sumeru during this time of the year, he remembers in the previous year when akademiya students ambushed him just to get him to blow a sickeningly sweet birthday cake. he lowers his head, until now he can't fully comprehend the nature of birthdays and its significance — for mortals, it may be because their lifespans are merely a flick of a finger compared to non-human races.
he has already lived for so long and will continue to do so, but what part of birthdays satisfy fulfillment if he rejects it himself? it's even so absurd that he is expected to extend gestures to others on his own day.
“hey, hat guy, do you know those tiny things with hats and a smiley face?” the little dragon's query snaps hat guy out of his zoned out state, he momentarily pauses to think what creatures he is referring to before furrowing his brows at the unsure conclusion in his mind, “what things?” the boy envisions the forest spirits around sumeru, the aranara. he doubts durin means the smiles as they do not have a smile, still he remarks those elemental clusters as cute.
“those little things! with hats like yours!” durin tries his best at composing his description, “wait, they have pointy hats, yours is flat.” his voice is small at the realization of the difference in design, “you should know what i mean, right?” he flies right in front of hat guy's face, hoping that his thoughts will get through to his friend.
“perhaps you mean the aranara? they're plant-like forest spirits in sumeru. where did you see one? they don't often show themselves as i've known.” hat guy explains, he sees the bright grin on durin's face, the sight melts him.
he knows the aranara only allows their presence to be known by children (adults can see them but terms and conditions must be met first, e.g. the traveler), and deep down he hopes for durin to take sight of those little things. he believes that durin is a child at heart, not only his small size and curious nature, but his core is akin to a little kid who dreams and hopes.
“they're called aranara? it sounds adorable!” durin giggles, “i saw a couple of them tailing behind the archon! do you think i can befriend them?” hat guy smiles, his sentiments mirroring durin's aspirations. “you can go find them and ask for a friendship contract.” he smirks, obviously teasing the little dragon, though his words carry genuine wishes for durin to create friendships.
“do we like call for them? i want to talk to one!” durin's eagerness at meeting the aranara spreads warmth in his chest, “you have to be patient. they'll appear whenever they deem right.” hat guy responds, he's not entirely knowledgeable about their decisions when or when not to appear, but he knows enough that the aranara values the people of sumeru — even if they're unseen, they're the nation's closest companion.
and he's assured enough that the aranara will welcome durin just as much as he was accepted as their friend.
“there you are!” a deep voice pipes up nearby, durin hastily flies behind hat guy to hide from the unknown voice. “who's there?” the little dragon closes his eyes, the fear of being judged is still within him, hence hat guy extends out both his arms as an act of protecting durin as his gaze seeking out who had spoken to them.
the general mahamatra comes to sight, albeit the most distinguishable factor for hat guy is the tall ears poking out from his hat. his right eyebrow is raised, posing a skeptical expression at the big-eared hat guy's presence and intentions with him.
“ah, the famous hat guy of the vahumana darshan. i believe you remember me from the interdarshan championship last year?” cyno utters, there's a prideful look on his face that makes hat guy even more wary of where this is going. “i recall our sparring moments during the competition, yes, you were the representative for spantamad.” hat guy responds, he knows this man is a big persona in the nation although he couldn't dig it in his memory what his name was.
“speak your intentions, i do not have the luxury of time right now.” hat guy asserts, he watches as cyno takes a deep inhale — and wonders what it's for — before he takes hat guy's hand and slaps down a stack of cards (dear archon, how did he manage to hide a tall stack?)
“do you know about genius invokation tcg? i've been meaning to find you and discuss the game. i have high hopes that you'll be a prodigy of a player, so please hear me out. i have read a few of your research, i applaud your intelligence and critical thinking for curating reasonable claims and powerful arguments. you know what else uses the same strategy? tcg! with your keen observation, wits, and quick analysis, i'm sure you'll be sumeru's second best player — i'm the first, of course — please accept my offer and play with me, i assure you that it is an efficient mental exercise outside of the akademiya. furthermore, playing with others allows a space for building relationships and strengthening bonds. what do you say, hat guy?”
oh, cyno definitely needed that deep inhale. hat guy, on the other hand, is bewildered.
“hat guy, what is he talking about?” durin whispers in his ears, still out of sight.
“you should take upon his offer, hat guy. not only will you gain friends in sumeru, but also acquire a reputable image across teyvat.” the green-eyed desert guy (who hat guy knows as the one who's oddly interested in his hat) shows up and backs up cyno's claim.
right now, he feels like nahida casted him in some weird dream spell because what the hell is going on?
hat guy scoffs, “only brains as small as a sweet flower seed would reckon that a measly card game is enough to be a backbone of life-and-death bonds.” still, the stack of cards remained in his hand.
as if cyno was about to take no for an answer, “keep the stack, hat guy. maybe one day you'll have a change of mind, come find me if you find it in yourself to admit that this game is—”
“hat guy!” another voice pops up in the scenario, but rather than having his guard up higher, hat guy's shoulders seem to relax upon hearing your voice.
as you enter the scene, you immediately realize the situation. there's a look of dread in hat guy's eyes that shows his disagreement towards card games. “general mahamatra, pardon for the intrusion, but please do excuse hat guy and his… displeasure with tcg. i'm sure there are other skilled scholars who are more interested in playing a match with you.” you intervene, a nervous laugh at the end because despite this silly interaction, cyno still holds a high position and you know the power this man has.
cyno was about to respond, but sethos — the green-eyed desert guy — beats him to it, “apologies, my lady. the general here just wants a formidable opponent because apparently i don't play enough tcg.” sethos explains as he casually points his thumb at cyno, “i'm not interested to be your opponent.” hat guy coldly rejects.
“no! you will play tcg with me one da—” sethos covers his mouth that he almost stumbled backwards, they bicker among themselves.
“hey, yn! long time, no see!” you hear durin's little whisper, you assume he's hiding behind hat guy, a giggle passes your lips and the endearing thought. “hey, durin. i missed you!” for a moment, you reminisce the first time durin visited the real world — you met him them as he and hat guy relayed to you the tales of simulanka and all the shenanigans that occurred.
“anyways! hat guy, you know you'd be so cute with your hair tied up.” sethos grinned, the change in topic also brightened up his aura however it only dimmed hat guy's. he takes off hat guy's hat, now he's just guy, and his fingers swiftly grabs a portion of his midnight-hued hair and ties a little bun.
and the cherry on top, a bow.
“...tch.”
hat guy never had his hair tied, you had played with a few strands whenever he lays down on your lap, but that's the closest his hair ever got touched. mini durin struggles to hide his laughter at the sight of his best friend's angered face being ten times more adorable with the new hairstyle.
he's extra convinced that this is just another dream simulated by nahida.
“i wonder what you would look like with your hair braided.” you giggle, envisioning different styles on his jellyfish-like haircut. “whatever it is, don't.” hat guy rolls his eyes.
you, hat guy, and mini durin continue to walk to whoever knows where, your path has strayed away from the city but it's no issue when hat guy finds relief in not having to be jumped on by scholars.
along the way, laughter and banter were thrown back and forth. “don't pretend it's erased in history that you broke my favorite pen!” you nag him, “it was already cracked, it just happened to break apart in my hand!” he defends himself, this argument has been going on for months now, it's your personal grudge against him that you bring up whenever he tries to drag you down.
“it's raining!” durin points out as the rain loudly splatters on the ground, “oi!” hat guy yelps as you take his hat and hovers it over your heads. “c'mon it's big enough.” you reason out, he sighs and rolls his eyes, durin is in between you two as you walk to find a better shelter.
until a small meow catches your attention, as if on instinct, your eyes darts toward the sound's origin. it didn't take long to find a small cat inside a pot, wet in the rain. the little guy seemed to be alone with no owner or parent cat around.
and it didn't take another thought for hat guy to grab his hat and cover the white cat's head, leaving you and durin exposed to the rain, “i'll take you to the shelter. follow me if you want.” he says, but instead picks up the cat in his arms — talk about personal autonomy, no?
shortly, he returns to you and durin, the hat barely covering your group but settles with whatever his hat can provide. it's a wondrous sight, no words were spoken at this moment, even durin who enjoyed conversing let the serene silence overpower the rainfall.
and hat guy realizes that not a word had fallen off your lips about his birthday. you certainly had not forgotten, right?
suddenly, his chest feels empty, which is weird enough for he doesn't even possess a heart. a human heart. his ribs feel tight, as if clenching on nothing; he doesn't understand the anomaly taking place within his core, the cat meows and snuggles against his chest, serving as a temporary remedy for the internal ache.
sometimes you were infuriating. not for reasons that are shallow and certainly he doesn't wish for your demise; he finds you the cause of the berserk inside him, for whenever you two are within each other's parameters, suddenly he's at ease and for some reason that he time and time again fails to provide an answer for, troubled.
dear archons, hat guy could almost solve all of sumeru's political issues — if he dared to — but this predicament that involves you bears no fruition to his efforts in understanding the effect you have on him. the lack of an emotional organ within him feels more and more apparent when there's a rampant of feelings flowing in his blood.
is this what a heart is for?
“the sky's clearing up!” durin beams, flying forward. “don't fly too far, you don't know where you're going.” hat guy scolds the little dragon who muttered an apology and returns close to him. 
you settled in an abandoned hut, based on the nearby surroundings, it's safe to assume you're around the region in between avidya forest and vanarana. “are you hungry little guy?” durin converses with the lone cat that chooses to stay on hat guy's lap, rendering him immobile until the cat is satisfied with its rest.
“say, durin, do you know what today is?” you ask the dragon, he tilts his head in response, “hat day, is today a special day?” you softly smile at how closely tied durin is to hat guy, you've known him since the day he started as an akademiya student, you were together at the same table in the library. he wasn't the sociable type, he made that clear, but you were persistent to break into his personal bubble until you finally claim a spot in his vicinity.
“it's just a normal day.” hat guy rolls his eyes, but the slight tint of pink on his cheeks doesn't go unnoticed. for hat guy, you were like a cat that demands to be paid attention to, a ginger-colored one that he can not seem to predict. 
“really? the sun seems to be too bright just for today to be normal.” he's confused, were you about to break open the forest and have the entirety of sumeru to sing him a happy birthday or there's something else up your sleeve that he can't guess.
“is that an aranara?!” durin squeals upon the sight of a blue aranara walking towards the group, hat guy follows durin's line of sight and spots not just one or two, but a small group of aranaras… and origamis?
his brows furrowed in disbelief, “what's going on?” hat guy looks at you with a puzzled face, you want to snort at his expression because clearly he's trying to avoid his birthday.
and you were not about to let him disregard his day like that.
the army of aranara and origami surrounds hat guy, the aranara orients a necklace of origami flowers around his neck. their little squeals speak of their joyous sentiment for this moment, a moment that belongs to hat guy.
“happy birthday.”
hat guy is stuck in a trance when he finally hears you say it.
“happy birthday, hat guy!” durin exclaims, he's flipping in circles, finally releasing the words he desperately tried to hide since he saw him.
“happy birthday, blue nara!”
“happy birthday, hero of simulanka!”
hat guy puts his hand on his chest as the greetings continue to echo in his ears, is this what happiness feels like?
“thank you.” he simply responds, clearing his throat to regain his usual composure. 
“we have gifts for you!” you crouch down in front of him, a big smile on your face. you gesture the aranaras and paper squirrels to come forth, they carry boxes filled with secret stories whose main character is hat guy.
“i got one too!” durin flies down to sit beside hat guy, his own little gift in his embrace.
“why would you celebrate my birthday?” his voice falters as he lets the question fly past his lips, “because i care for you, hat guy. you're special to me.” you simply reply, hoping that it delivers the deeper meaning of his existence to your life.
you love him, you will forever do so.
hat guy hums, unsure how to reply when he's fighting his innermost turmoil of crystalflies. he resorts to opening the gifts instead, one box containing a hand-crafted paper doll of himself, the enraged expression has him instinctively mirroring the same look, “is this how you see me?” he scoffs, but they let him tell his rough comments and cold feedback as he continues his unboxing spree.
“i've got plenty of unusual stuff from you and you still haven't run out of ideas? even durin has his own contribution.” he sighs, his indigo orbs lingering on the gifts you prepared. the stack of tcg cards from cyno still in his possession.
“because you deserve to be reminded that you're loved and wanted.”
loved and wanted, huh?
hat guy quietly apologizes as he moves the cat off his lap, he leans down to you and his hands cup your cheeks. “last time i checked, you're one of the top rtawahist students, but i must refute your claim on that one.”
“then i'll defend my argument, the absence of a physical heart does not restrict your emotional intelligence and morale. your ribs may not house an organ, but your embrace has proven otherwise.”
you may not know the burden that he hides underneath his facade or the weights that made him believe that love is an outerworldly entity, but one thing you will attest to is the hat guy who knows how to love.
even if it takes years for hat guy to realize and admit that he loves, you will continue to be the one to assure him that it's alright.
for the love he yearns and continues to long for is the birthday gift you promise to give him every year. for as long as you live, and in every reincarnation, you will love hat guy.
hat guy covers durin's eyes as he leans down to collide his lips on yours. the crystalflies in his stomach explode, but it's soon replaced with fulfillment. maybe, he doesn't need a heartbeat to tell him that he can love when he's capable of choosing to love.
there's light in his life when you arrived that one afternoon asking what thesis he was working on, there was you who appeared to hold him when the akademiya felt suffocating, and there will always be you beside him who loves and teaches him love.
if the dendro archon is reading his mind right, he would like to say that he doesn't feel lonely now. he has you now. and even without a birthday cake, he'd like to make a wish: please don't ever become a stranger whose laugh i can recognize anywhere.
“it seems like you're the one who's looking forward to my birthday.”
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bernardsbendystraws · 8 months ago
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Fresh Air
Matt Sturniolo x Reader
Check out my pinned post for more of my writing.
00 01 02 03 04 05 06 07 08 09 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 FINAL
Summary: One night at a party seems to change everything. A strange man with a friendly smile and a sleeve of patchwork tattoos seems to make you feel at home for a change. You're finally happy to have made a good friend to lean on - especially when it comes to your not-so-great relationship with your boyfriend. But what happens if you lean too much...what happens if you fall?
Warnings: 18+. This series contains mature themes, read at your own risk. (SMUT, angst, parental troubles, financial hardships, and more. Don't like, don't read.) This warning is made for all parts.
A/N: To be added to the taglist, send a request in my inbox or comment on the pinned post. I'm far more likely to see requests sent to my inbox.
With love and big tits, Rose.
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03: Close My Eyes
The clinks of glass and ceramic plates make my heart patter faster as I set the table. He’s coming here—he’ll be here any minute. 
I had to go to Manon for ideas on how to ‘try harder.’ It wasn’t simple to come up with something for whatever reason—every idea had some sort of flaw. Even this one. 
Hayden wasn’t easy to please. The man got himself everything, there was nothing that I could get him. I had to do something that just took effort of a skill I wasn’t entirely confident in—cooking. 
It was a simple dish. Pasta and garlic bread, something I knew he would like. The preparation was easy, but for some reason—it felt really emotional. I was swallowing thick clumps of anxiety while blinking up and the ceiling as I cooked the pasta. 
What was wrong?
I wanted to be excited for his reaction. I really fucking wanted to feel any sort of confidence, but all I felt was a puddle of nerves that made me feel a little sick. It started after I got his text, the one of him replying to mine, asking him to come over. He was already upset. Hayden didn’t like being in my apartment, that’s why we usually stuck to his place. 
But, this was a surprise. He was gonna come over and any lingering frustration from breaking our normal routine would be diminished when he saw me trying…right? 
Overthinking. I couldn’t stop overthinking. My outfit didn’t even seem good. I had changed a countless amount of times, but nothing seemed quite right. He wasn’t coming over dressed up. There was a high chance he was coming over in jeans and a T-shirt. The amount of clothes I had shoved into my laundry basket was ungodly. 
My heart stops as I hear the knocks on the door. 
Part of me wants to convince myself the nervous sweat starting to heat up the back of my neck is excitement, but I know it’s not. It’s fear. 
Swinging open the door for him, I watch as his furrowed brows cock upward in surprise analyzing my appearance. 
He’s happy. Something about his lightened expression makes me feel relief and regret at the same time.
Why did I wear this?
It was a skirt. Something I had to literally dig for in my wardrobe. I hated it. It was too short, too…too much. The soft red fabric felt like an article of clothing I would have to wear for modeling gigs—the type of shoots that made the mirror look like a threat. 
“Wow, babe…” 
Babe. Ugh. 
But, this is what I wanted. He’s content—this is progress. This can be something that makes me feel good if I just let it. I can’t have unconditional love if I don’t work for it. It’s a two-way street. He’s trying, I’m trying. 
This is something.
“Do you, um…wanna come in? I,” I open the door wider, letting him in and gesturing towards the small dining table that is somewhat hidden behind the countertops of my quaint kitchen set-up. Apartment living. “--I made us dinner. Pasta and garlic bread.” 
His shoes tap on my wooden floors like nails scratching on a chalkboard. Germs. But, his happy smile deters me from the annoyance as he waves his hands with disbelief, letting them land softly on my shoulders. 
“This is really sweet, thank you, I—c’mere,” he husks, pulling me into his chest as his hands swarm around my hips. 
Shouldn’t this feel…good? 
I let my hand pat on his back. The feeling of his hands squeezing into my sides makes my face crinkle. 
This will be worth it.
Please let this be worth it. 
__________
Hayden seemed more than pleased. The effort really seemed to pay off—to him. 
Even his chewing pissed me off. 
He had his phone on the table, placing it face down after checking it occasionally. His ‘buddies’ were all goofing around in the groupchat. I tried to listen to him explain the inside joke. It just wasn’t funny when he kept squeaking his shoes on the floor and leaving the information drifting off in the air as he kept getting distracted by his phone. 
I tried to eat. The food I had been working to make for a little under an hour didn’t even seem appealing. Not when I felt so uncertain and sick. 
His plate was empty besides some residue and crumbs. I piled mine onto his before taking the dishes over to my kitchen and placing them in the sink. He didn’t even offer to help. Or get off his fucking phone. 
After taking a deep breath, I turn around to find him sitting on my couch, sitting in the middle of the small piece of furniture with his legs spread lazily. He rests his phone on the coffee table. I pace over to him, expecting any sort of movement from his end to make room for me to sit. 
He doesn’t. 
“C’mere, just sit,” he directs, patting his lap while giving me a grin. 
Sighing, I try to let my anger fade. Why am I so frustrated? Why did this feel so belittling? I didn’t want to sit in his lap. But, I had only been so pent up about stupid things—things I could’ve voiced. Maybe if I had asked him to slip off his shoes, he would’ve. 
“I…could you just—take off your shoes? Sorry, I just don’t wanna—” 
I’m immediately cut off as he slips off his shoes, pulling me into his lap abruptly. My neck twists to the side as he nuzzles his nose against me, his breath making a laugh slip through my lips with an awkward discomfort. 
“Hmmmm,” he sighs, “-you look so sexy in this, babe. Did you wear it for me?” he asks. His hands plush against the tops of my thighs, sliding up and the skirt starts to bunch. Panic shrivels through my system as I clutch the fabric to sit straight. 
“Um, I,” my words hitch in my throat as I feel him place rough, hungry kisses on my neck. His hands push mine to the side, nearly pulling my skirt to bunch at my hips before I forcefully pull it back down. “-Hayden, I don’t wanna have sex tonight.” 
The statement seems to make him scoff against, his hands wandering to grip my waist before he lets himself cup my breast. “Ugh—are you sure? I mean, c’mon…” he gruffs. 
Gritting my teeth, I take his wrist and throw his hand back onto the couch, standing up and pulling down my skirt. “You can’t just do that. That—that’s—” My nose scrunches with frustration as I run blank with words. 
“That, what? Makes you feel unimportant?” he spits, echoing the same words that I had said to him when promising to try harder. 
Fuck.
I don’t know if it’s the anger of just the piles of emotions, but the warmth clouds my vision with tears as I bite into my cheek. 
“How does it make you feel? I just—fuck. I wanted to feel good. With you. That’s what couples do. Why the fuck—” he clenches his jaw before taking a deep breath, lowering his tone. “-why the fuck do you not want anything to do with me? I get that you tried—you made dinner. But…I just wanted to be a normal couple for once. You…you don’t even let me kiss you in public and now…” 
“I don’t like PDA. It—it makes me uncomfortable,” I say, whispering quietly as my chest gets heavier and heavier by the second. 
“You won’t even let me kiss you in private right now,” he points out. 
Because I know it won’t just be kissing. 
It’s what I wanna say. But the rage is fading into confusion and sadness as he looks at me pointedly. 
Hayden sighs deeply, resting his elbows on his knees before extending his hands out. Hesitantly, I place my hands in his. “Hey,” he starts, rubbing his thumbs over my knuckles while staring up at me. “-I just wanna appreciate you. We don’t have to tonight, I guess. I…I know you’re trying and we’re getting there, okay?” 
He’s trying, I’m trying.
But how am I not trying hard enough? 
Why did I have to just…snap?
If I had said it nicer, maybe it wouldn’t be like this. Maybe we wouldn’t have to feel like this. 
Maybe I’m not trying enough. 
“Come sit on my lap. We…we don’t have to do anything. Let’s just…I don’t know—we could watch a movie?” 
I nod, sitting back into his lap as he wraps an arm around my waist, leaning forward and grabbing the remote from the coffee table. As he pulls the object back, it flips his phone upwards. The bright screen catches my attention, my curiosity keeping my eyes trained on the small notifications that are unreadable from the distance. 
“Are you serious?” he huffs, grabbing his phone and shoving it into his pocket. 
“I’m sorry, I wasn’t trying to snoop—” I start, getting cut off by his brutally rushed voice. 
“If either of us were cheating, it would be you with the guys you hangout with all the time. You’re…fuck, just—let’s try to have a good night. You make shit so difficult sometimes.” 
I feel the uncomfortable edge of his phone prod into my thigh as I try to shift around. Hayden hisses through his teeth, a painful grip from his hands grasping into my hips. 
“Could you not? If—fuck,” he groans, making my body freeze to a stop, despite the prodding discomfort. “--are you sure, babe? We—”
“I…I don’t—” 
“It’s fine.” he cuts off. 
It’s not fine. His voice and his grasping hands staying latched onto me tell me it’s anything but fine. He’s frustrated. Just as much as me—if not more. 
My heart sinks into my near empty stomach as I sit tensely in his grip. A movie starts playing—a random one I’ve never seen before. I can tell by his laugh from the first line that this is one of the movies he likes. And I didn’t even know what it was. 
All I knew was I felt like shit. 
__________
I had been spam texting Manon like crazy. Hayden had left around an hour ago in an awkward silence, but fuck—that tension still lingered and I could feel my nails gripping into my own arms for some desperation to be grounded. 
She was busy. She had to go to bed since she had a ridiculously early shoot tomorrow. Her ‘goodnight’ text made my heart sink. 
And then there was another knocking on the door. 
Did he already come back? 
Taking soft steps to make as little noise as possible, I glance through the peephole and nearly drop to the floor. Matt’s face is impossibly close to the little tunnel. A breathless laugh pushes through my lips as I open the door, coming face-to-face with him.
“Matt? Jesus—you scared me!” I exclaim. 
“Sorry, I—I would’ve texted, but I was just, um…” his eyes shift to look behind. I swing the door open further, nodding my head inside as he walks in. “---Nick and Chris are at some party, but I got bored so I…came here, I guess?” he says, scratching the back of his neck. 
Tilting my head at his uncertain tone, I shut the door. Matt places a plastic bag on the counter, bending slightly to slip his shoes off and place them on the rack next to my sneakers. 
“What’s in the bag?” I ask. 
“Oh! Look, c’mere-” I follow behind Matt as he opens the crinkled bag. As he opens it, he pulls out a bag of chocolates—the chocolates I loved, but could never get. They were seasonal. Specifically–Valentine’s Day. I had only ever told him about them since we had only met in the summer and it’s only been a couple of months. 
“Matt! How did you find these!” I exclaim. He tears open the bag with a smile, grabbing a handful and hovering his hand in the air. I open my palm, a jittering flutter of nostalgia flowing through my body as the familiar pink Hershey Kiss wrappers land in my hold. 
“Apparently you can buy them online and I did a little bit ago just in case you were havin’ a bad day, ya know? I, also—” he reaches back in the bag, pulling out wax candy bottles, something he’s told me about from his own childhood. Matt was shocked when I said I’d never tried them before. He was determined to have me try one at some point.
I guess today was the day. 
A pout of overwhelming emotions clouds on my face. I set the chocolates down on the counter before wrapping my arms around his neck. Matt is stiff for a second. He melts into me completely, his arms hesitantly wrapping around my waist and his nose digging into my hair. 
“Thank you, I…I was having a shit day, to be honest.” 
He remembers—somehow he just knows. 
“I…of course, can we just, um—maybe let’s just sit on your couch and talk? Eat some junk?” he offers. A smile covers my face as I quickly nod against his chest. I go to pull away, letting out a light gasp as he tugs me in closer to his chest. 
It’s so warm.
I should question the extended hug. I should awkwardly laugh and pull away. But—I can’t help but melt into him completely, a sad look of reality crossing over my face as I reminisce on the heavy feeling in my chest. 
“Are you okay? Like—really?” he whispers. 
There’s a certain spotlight that makes everything seem more real. And it makes my eyes burn with warm tears as I choke on a dry laugh. 
“I mean—”
I try to play it off. The lighthearted choke is cut off as I feel him hug me tighter into his chest, making my voice crack as something just shatters in me. 
“No,” I let out shakily. “-not really, I…” I grow silent with trembling lips. 
“Hey, hey, hey, you don’t have to say anything, okay? I—we’re….we’re friends, I’m here for you. Let’s just relax for a bit, yeah?” he voices. 
The pressure from overwhelming emotions is relieved by his words. I don’t have to talk, I don’t have to do anything but relax.
Finally. 
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strangecowplant · 11 months ago
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please help me pay my kitties emergency vet bill!
ive never done this before but one of my cats just had to get an extremely sudden emergency procedure and i don't know what to do, my vet and i have reached out to a couple incredible programs here to help with the bill but one is less than half and the other hasn't replied back yet, i've already declined the blood work (CA$356) to lower the bill at the risk of possible underlying liver and kidney issues not being found but its still a monumental amount for us right now. i just feel so helpless
we had enough to pay the minimum deposit to get the procedure started in time thankfully, but we were already scraping by as it is and now we're in desperate need of funds to eat/pay rent/pay off any remainder of the bill. i am disabled without aid and have been unable to work/haven't worked since 2015 but am on track to hopefully start working pt this fall. i live with my mom who has 3-4 jobs including one seasonal job which needless to say is stressful and wearing her down. we unfortunately are stuck in the most expensive place to live in canada with the inability to save up to flee so the cycle is never ending.
this is Teddy, my typically very silly vocal happy boy who's not quite 2 yet, my comfort king, my little muffin who acts like a weighted blanket for me at night and eases my anxiety, his favourite toy is his pink unicorn poof, he loves car rides and he can shake paw!
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he got a sudden urinary blockage last night with no straight answer as to why and progressively got worse as the night went on, i didnt sleep at all, i was panicking and bawling, naturally, and raced to the vet to get in as soon as the door opened. i assumed it was a uti which wouldn't have been as costly, but it turned out to be much more severe and life threatening. i never expected my usually extremely healthy boy to suddenly be at risk of that and im still trying to just process whats been happening
he needed to be sedated and given a catheter and some medication, the total bill came to CA$985.62, of which we were barely able to pay 500 of, and one program was able to donate 300 leaving a total of CA$185.62 for the bill. this, of course, leaves us scrambling for food and rent as well
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i know there are a lot of fundraisers out there needing donations right now, and i really hate letting myself be so open and raw like this but even a dollar would help tremendously and i would be forever grateful for any help whatsoever, even a rb to signal boost is greatly appreciated <3
TLDR; my cat had a sudden life threatening issue and now we can't pay the full vet bill or pay for food/rent
Paypal
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streamdotpng · 4 months ago
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Quick sale till... march? Maybe? Who knows, i'm trying to get verified in Vgen so i'll keep the sale going until i reach that or if there's too many orders
If you'd like more examples of my works, feel free to check the tags commission work, rendered, my art or ask for more in DM’s!
You can either commission me through Vgen or here. I'd appreciate it if its through vgen so i can get verified but if you don't feel like it, shoot me a DM and we can talk there.
Now, read everything below first before commissioning me.
🗐 COMMERCIAL RIGHTS
⚲ IMPORTANT!
Upon commissioning the artist, the client automatically agrees to the terms of service provided, as it is assumed they have read them. If there are any questions or concerns, feel free to reach out through DMs or my other socials.
No additional payments are required for the following, as long as credit is given with my handle "@streamdotpng" whenever used:
✔ Icons, Banners, Thumbnails, and Posts used for streaming or other content purposes.
If the art is used for commercial purposes, with the artist’s consent, the artist will receive an agreed-upon percentage of the sales profits.
✒ GENERAL
The Artist has the right to refuse a commission if they are not comfortable or confident about the request.
The client is allowed to ask for progress updates every 2-4 days and are freely given.  If it is a rushed commission, feel free to ask for more frequent updates.
By commissioning the artist, the client acknowledges that the artist is a student and this is not the artist’s full-time job. The client should not expect the artist to treat it as such.
Communications will generally be done in Vgen Chats (Please check your emails for chat notifications). Unless you prefer to communicate in other applications, that is also allowed as long as you let me know. Scroll down to see the end of my Terms of Service for my contacts or check the links in my profile.
Under any circumstances, Clients are not permitted to use any part of the commissioned artwork for non-fungible tokens (NFTs), blockchain, cryptocurrency platforms or AI Training. Such usage is strictly prohibited and may result in legal action taken.
✎ᝰ. CAN, MIGHT & WON’T DRAW!
╰┈➤ CAN DRAW !
Fanart
Shipping [GL, BL, Straight, Yumeship]
Original Characters
PNGtuber Models (e.g Blinking, Speaking)
Character sheets
╰┈➤ MIGHT DRAW ! (We’ll need to talk more about these requests)
Anthropomorphic animals
Heavy Armor
Excessive Gore
Comics
Complicated backgrounds (e.g. Detailed interior, buildings etc)
Honestly, if it isn’t in the "Can Draw" list, let’s talk about it!
╰┈➤✖  WILL NOT DRAW !
Depiction of suicide and self harm
Depiction of any type of hateful/political art
Anything that crosses my personal boundaries 
⏱ TIMELINE & WORK PROCESS
Work completion will take at least 1-2 weeks minimum, depending on the amount of commissions worked on. 
My work process simplified: Draft and Line Art ➤ Colouring ➤ Final Touches.
My work process expanded on: Draft ➤ Line Art ➤ Flat Colours ➤ Shading ➤ Final Work.
After completing each stage, I will contact you for either payment or revisions and thoughts. 
$ PRICING & PAYMENT
Prices vary depending on the commission. I’m flexible, but here are some base prices:
$5-10 USD depending on the background
$10-15 USD per person added
Note: There can be additional charges due to PayPal fees.
Half the payment is expected to be paid upfront Post-Draft or Post-Line Art. The rest of the payment will be paid fully after the Flat Colours are seen and approved. If payment hasn't been received, the Artist will not continue until then.
The option to fully pay upfront is allowed but must be talked about before sending over the money.
No refunds are allowed after the draft has been sent.
You can pay through PAYPAL, KOFI or VGEN
↺ REVISION POLICIES
Once the coloring stage begins, the only major revisions permitted are details that the artist may have missed and was specified by the client while the commission was still in the sketching/lineart stage (e.g. a missing tattoo that’s essential to the character’s design).
If the client is unsatisfied with the commission Post-Line Art, the artist is willing to discuss and make minor edits as stated prior (e.g. adjusting colors). However, the artist will not redraw the piece and expects full payment, as the client should have specified in the sketch stage the changes they wanted to be made.
The client may not hire another artist to adjust the image without the artist’s consent.
The artist is willing to edit the image post commission for the commissioner, but may charge a small fee depending on what is being asked of them
🛈 RUSHED COMMISSIONS
Rush Fees apply. Contact me first to discuss how much you’re willing to pay for the rush fee.
The fastest turnaround time is 1-2 days (maximum 4 days) with the same quality as my usual work.
For short deadlines, you must be responsive when it comes to communication. It'd save us both the headache and worry.
▸ DISCLAIMER!
Breaking or disrespecting the rules of the Terms of Service will lead to a permanent ban and you will be blacklisted. It means, users who break the Terms of Service will lose the rights to commission me.
However, I may allow second chances. Blacklisted users can contact me with proof of improved behavior to request removal.
---
…and that’s about it? Just don’t expect me to be obligated to draw something and we’ll figure something out. Not to mention that depending on how much commissions i’m getting and how busy i am, the art will take atleast a few days to a week!
If you got references, provide them! It’ll help alot. You can also ask for progress updates, just don’t mind me accidentally not seeing the message bc this is tumblr and I don’t get notifs for some reason.
That’s about it, thanks for seeing this yall. Again, If you want to see more examples, simply look at my art tags in my account or send a DM and i'll send some over there.
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letsgobarbs · 4 months ago
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something is in this 3am juice tonight that canva is absolutely cooking, here’s a Javier Peña x Indian Reader moodboard (could be south asian reader but I have included a picture that's written in Hindi)
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Did you guys know that the Indian Embassy in Bogotá opened in 1973? Cause I didn't. They didn't do much though in the region I don't think…
Did you guys know there is a sizeable community of Hispanic and Latino Muslims? Did you guys know that South Asian immigrants and Mexican immigrants married each other and had blended families?? Here’s this really cool PBS doc I watched about it. I just think it’s so neat.
I know people (especially non-americans) make a lot of sweeping statements about America being awful. Politically and on a government level it might be. But they can never make me hate y'all. The BIPOC and queer communities there were some of the most welcoming, kind and beautiful people who actively worked to better their communities and the world around them. Because I was on a college campus, the communities were liberal and progressive, so the White people were really cool too. The diversity in America is absolutely unreal and you don't quite get the gist of it outside of America. And I know some of y'all are trying very hard to preserve that. So sending all of you guys love from a former European colony that is now a Fascist state to another former European colony that is now a fascist state. Stay strong and proud <33
also call me a fucking liar about being bad at moodboards but im not mad about this one at all please don't jinx the vibe ive got with my canva she's finally listening to me
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f1goat · 1 year ago
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roommates ; lando norris + part seven
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In which you have to live with your brothers best friend who you really don't like, Lando Norris, and his many 'girlfriends' for a while, but there's always a thin line between love and hate.
masterlist - playlist
lando norris x fem!verstappen reader tw: smut & not proofread
You let out an annoyed grunt when you wake up for the second time that night. Lando is still pressed up against your body. It’s nice, you’re more then comfortable with him cuddling you like this, but still you can’t seem to fall asleep. Every time you think you’ve finally fallen asleep, you wake up only a bit of time later. Maybe it’s your thoughts who keep you awake. There did happen a lot tonight after all. You relive the earlier happenings. Every time you think about what happened between Lando and you, you feel yourself getting heated. 
Before you can relive every moment for the tenth time this night, Lando wakes up as well. You feel him move against your body. It’s hard to miss how his cock grinds over your ass. Fuck, you feel yourself getting even more bothered right now. Are you really getting aroused again just because of this? Then a thought pops up in your head, could it be that you’re still too horny to sleep? It happened to you before, so it wouldn’t surprise you now that you think about it. 
“Can’t sleep babygirl?” Lando asks you with a raspy voice. That’s not making things better. Since when can he sound this hot? 
“No,” you softly confirm. 
“Something that’s keeping you awake?” Lando continues to ask. 
You don’t reply verbally. It’s not like you can tell Lando that you’re still horny, right? And you’re not even sure about that being the problem, it can also be because of everything that happened. Your mind is a mess right now trying to progress everything from tonight. 
“Or do you want to sleep in your own bed?” Lando asks you a bit nervous. Maybe he shouldn’t have pushed you to sleep here. 
This time you’re fast to respond. “No,” you reassure him quickly, “I uh, I don’t know what’s keeping me awake.”
“Regret?” Lando continues to ask you. He feels nervous while waiting for your answer. What if you tell him that you regret what happened? 
In the mean time you’re thinking about what to say. Words are getting mixed up in your head. You don’t regret what happened and you need Lando to know that as well, but you do however wonder what will be the result of that. And then you’re still feeling horny, which isn’t helping as well. You want to tell Lando all of that, but when you open your mouth it’s just one word that leaves your tongue. 
“Horny.”
“Horny?” Lando asks you confused, “You can’t sleep because you’re horny?” 
After saying it already, you can’t do anything else then confirm it. Slowly you nod your head to show Lando that being horny is in fact your problem right now. You see a small grin forming on Lando his face. He seems to like this answer. 
“Oh babygirl,” Lando softly says, “Let me help you.”
“Please,” you beg. 
You add more power to your words, by throwing the blankets of and moving yourself closer to Lando. Unsure you take place on his lap. You feel his hardened boner pressing against your thighs. Lando lets out a low grunt. “The things you’re doing to me princess,” he groans. You grind yourself on Lando his lap. 
Lando tries to take you off his lap, but you deny him. “Let me make you feel good,” he mutters frustrated, but you just shake your head. “Babygirl,” he says with a stern voice. It almost works, but you hold your position in his lap. “I can’t do anything like this,” Lando adds.
“That’s the point,” you softly tell Lando, “This time I’m going make sure you feel good.” 
Lando doesn’t know what overcomes him. Fuck, you’re incredibly hot already and when you’re saying things like that it only makes you hotter. You hover above him, making sure his boner is lined up with your entrance, before coming down again. It’s way more intense then earlier, you feel his dick sliding inside of you. Not that it’s hard, you’re still wet from thinking about earlier tonight. 
“Fuck,” Lando whimpers, “You better wake me up for this a whole lot more.”
You don’t reply to his statement. For now you focus on riding Lando his cock and making it one of the best times out of his life. Something you believe you’re accomplishing, at least with how many moans are coming out of Lando is seems so. 
While looking at Lando, you increase your pace a bit. You can’t seam to tear your eyes off from Lando. He looks amazing like this. There’s some sort of carefree look on his face, he seems to be focused on the pleasure and nothing else right now. Of course, you have always found him hot, but now he seems even more beautiful. 
“Babygirl,” Lando moans, “I’m getting close.”
He lets his finger find your clitoris. Teasingly he circles onto it. It causes you to let out a moan. That only seems to motivate Lando to continue his movements, only this time he increases his pace. His other hand finds it’s way to your ass, harshly he takes it into his hand. All of this make sure that you’re getting closer to your orgasm as well. 
“Kiss me,” Lando grunts. You do what he says. Carefully you move your head down to make sure you can press your lips against Lando’s. He’s quick to react to your movements. Within seconds he is firmly kissing you back and sliding his tongue into your mouth. The two of you battle for dominance for a couple seconds, but Lando is quick to win again. He feels a moan from you vibrating against his lips. 
When you pull back from the kiss, it’s only to tell Lando how close you are. Instead of telling you to come, Lando does to opposite. 
“Ask me,” Lando instructs you, “Ask me if you can orgasm.”
You show Lando a surprised look. At first you want to tell him to fuck off, but when you start thinking about it a bit more, it starts to sound hot. Before you can react, Lando continues to talk to you. 
“Such a brat,” he whimpers while slowing down his movements on your clit, “Need you to be my brat.” 
You know that boys don’t mean things they say during sex, but you can’t help yourself and start to feel fluttered. You want nothing more then for Lando to mean everything he’s saying right now.
What you don’t know, is that Lando is one of the exceptions. He means every word of what he just told you. 
“Can I orgasm?” You shyly ask Lando. 
“No,” He answers, “Not like this, do your best.”
“Fuck,” you mutter, “Can I please orgasm Lan?”
“Better,” Lando praises you, “Come for me, my good girl.”
That’s all it takes for you to let go. Lando is quick to follow you. When you try to remove yourself from his body and also his dick, Lando pins you down against his chest. “No,” he softly mutters, “Just sleep like this.” It sounds insane, but within seconds you have fallen asleep on Lando his chest. 
The rest of the night you don’t wake up anymore. You’re sleeping rather peacefully.
The following morning, you have no idea how to start a conversation with Lando. Maybe because the both of you are still naked, maybe because his dick is hard again and makes your mouth water, or maybe because you have no idea how to confess your feelings to him. Not that you’re planning to confess, that would just be dumb. Lando is still a player.
When Lando wakes up, he barely feels different then you. The sight of your naked body on top of him, makes him aroused in no time. He knows that the two of you should talk, but for now he just wants to fuck you again. If you let him. 
“Good morning babygirl,” Lando softly murmurs to you. He toys a bit with your hair while waiting for you to respond. 
“Morning Lan,” you reply with a soft voice. You’re distracted already by Lando his raspy morning voice. That can’t be good. You know that you have to talk with Lando about what happened last night, because if you’re laying on him like this any longer you’d probably switch talking for sex. “I guess we have to talk?” You question him a bit nervous. 
“Depends,” Lando replies, “Do you want to talk?”
You don’t know what to answer. No you don’t want to talk, you want Lando to rail you until you can’t walk anymore. Although you guess that you’re already pretty close to that after last night. But you know that the two of you have to talk, otherwise this will turn into an even bigger mess.
“I guess we have to,” you tell him, “because I don’t know what will happen otherwise.”
Lando sighs softly. “How do you think about all of this?” He asks you curious. 
His question silences you again. Why is he only asking hard questions this morning? You haven’t even had the time to think about all of this. Maybe it would be smarter to take a moment for yourself and think everything over instead of already discussing everything. 
“I don’t know,” you confess. 
“Then let’s talk later,” Lando suggests. It humors you how he has the exact same idea as you. You show Lando a small smile and tell him that you agree with his idea. Lando presses a soft kiss against your cheek as answer. 
Would it be bad to have sex with him another time? Like, now.
Lando is doing everything in his power to stop himself from trying to have sex with you again. But when he notices the glance in your eyes and the way you bite your own lip, he almost loses it. He tries to calm himself down again, but when he feels your hands on his chest he knows that it has no use. 
“Babygirl,” he grunts, “If I were you I’d stop doing those things, because otherwise I’m going to fuck you so hard that you can’t walk for the rest of the day.”
You press a small kiss against the corner of his mouth before grinning. “What’s stopping you?” You ask Lando.
In no time you’re laying underneath him again. It’s not like this is helping your situation at all, but it feels a lot better then thinking about what’s happening between Lando and you.
+++
“Sooo,” you drag the word for as long as you can manage, to afraid to continue your sentence and what will happen after. When Lando doesn’t reply, you do however finish your sentence. “Let’s talk,” you suggest nervously. 
You have just gotten out of the shower. Finally you had some time to think about everything that happened. Not that it helped. You still have no idea how to continue now. It’s still unclear to you what you want. It’s scaring you that you feel attracted to Lando, in more then a physical way. It’s not like Lando wants a relationship with you. He’s a player. But, you need to know what you want as well. You can’t act like nothing happened between the two of you. You can’t act like you don’t want this to happen again. It’s unclear when you started having feelings for Lando, but in some weird way it feels like those feelings have been there forever. 
“Let’s talk,” Lando confirms. 
By saying those exact words, he leads the conversation back to you. Meaning you have to continue, to start the conversation that you’ve been dreading to do since this morning. You have no idea what to say. You don’t even know what you want. Suddenly a stressed feelings creeps up in your chest. 
“Uhm,” you try to start, but you’re quick to stutter. There’s no full word coming out of your mouth right now. “I uh,” you continue, “I really don’t know how to go on from this.” 
Lando is surprised by your words. After you told him it was a mistake last night, he expected the worst. So, this almost seems good. If it’s up to Lando you’re dating from now one, but he doesn’t think you want that was well. 
“You can make me your boyfriend,” he eventually jokes. It does sound like a joke. His voice is lighthearted and his tone is jokingly. However, it’s not. It’s another form of self defense. He’s not ready to be rejected by you. You almost scoff because of his ‘joke’. An annoyed glance is send in his direction. 
“I don’t think that’s what you want,” you sigh a bit annoyed. Lando almost asks you if it’s what you want, but he doesn’t dare to do so. “Look,” you continue to speak, “I don’t know how to go further from this. It’s not like I want to act if nothing happened, because I can’t simply forget about it. However, I have no clue how to act around you now.”
“Act the same as before,” Lando quickly states. 
He surprises you. His words always seem to get you by surprise. 
“What’s the same?” You ask Lando confused, “It’s not like I can have sex with you like yesterday whenever I feel like it.”
“Why not?” Lando questions you back, “If it’s up to me, you can. Just act however you want. I  also don’t want to forget about last night and this morning.” 
“How do you imagine this?” 
Lando picks his next words carefully. He doesn’t want you to think it’s just sex, but he also doesn’t want to scare you off. “What if we just explore this a bit?” Lando asks you. It’s the only thing he dares to ask you, but it’s better then nothing. 
“Explore what?” You question Lando, “The sex?”
“Not just that,” Lando quickly says, “We can explore us.” 
“Sounds vague,” you joke, “but also good.”
Lando lets out a relieved sigh. He didn’t even know he was holding in this much breath. He can’t believe that you’re okay with this. In the meantime you show him a small smile. Lando can’t help himself and moves closer towards you. Softly he presses a kiss against the corner of your mouth. It makes your smile grow.
“You’re cute,” Lando mutters more to himself then towards you. 
“Cute?” You ask surprised. That’s not a word someone used to describe you before. 
“So fucking cute,” Lando states.
In some weird way you can’t stop smiling after Lando said that. The two of you enjoy the short moment of silence. It’s Lando his phone who interrupts it. A thread of messages pops up on his screen. Without really meaning to do it, you read along with Lando. You read the messages coming from an unknown number. It’s a picture first. Lando doesn’t open the notifications. He doesn’t need to however. It’s pretty clear that it’s a nude. The messages underneath it tell you enough. 
Lando doesn’t look at you while opening the notifications. When you see the picture, it is indeed a nude photograph from a girl. She seems beautiful. Fuck. You can’t even say that you’re surprised. Lando barely told you that he wanted to explore this with you and he already has a nude from someone. It’s almost funny how stupid you are. 
Then Lando does something else that surprises you. He swipes on his phone and blocks the number. He throws his phone away from himself and focusses his attention on you. 
“Lando?” You ask softly. He nods at you, waiting to hear your question. “What exactly are we doing?” You continue to ask. 
“Exploring us,” Lando answers.
“What is us?” You question, “Us the friends with benefits?” 
“Whatever you want it to be,” Lando replies. 
“I don’t know,” you confess. 
“Let me know when you do know princess,” Lando chuckles.
“What do you want?” You ask him back. 
“Whatever you want,” Lando smiles, “but whatever it is, it’s exclusive. It’s only us.”
You show Lando another smile. Before you can tell him that exclusive sounds great, Lando is already talking about something else again. “Do you already have McLaren clothes?” He asks you. 
“Sorry?” You ask confused.
“Or even better, clothing from my line?”
“For what?” You ask even more confused.
“The race,” Lando states as if it’s the most logical answer. “I told you right? You’re coming to the race with me, so we’re leaving tomorrow. And if you’re coming with me, I want you to wear my clothes.”
Why are those words making you feel all hot and bothered? You should stress right now about packing, but in some weird way you’re only focused on Lando. In no time your lips are on his while you position yourself on his lap. 
This will be a good weekend.
“And,” Lando softly says after you pull back, “maybe after this weekend, you can tell me what we’re exploring exactly.”
You don’t answer to that. It’s not like you already know an answer. You focus your attention on Lando and making sure that he’s undressed in the next couple minutes.
a/n; let me know what you think!! <3
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bittsandpieces · 1 year ago
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Your body is so perfect. I’m so jealous and I think I need to go on a diet..
I saw this ask earlier but I wanted to wait until I had time to really sit down and respond to it properly.
This is my body. And this is also my body.
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Anon, what you see on this blog is a curated version of myself. My body is positioned in ways that are aesthetically pleasing, which cover up the things that I'm self-conscious about, like my stomach. I try to be as body positive as I can be, but I still struggle with accepting my body as it is!
I don't eat as healthy as I should. I'm always dehydrated despite my best efforts. I'm messy and a little gross and human just like everyone else. The things you see online are curated to show the best parts of ourselves, because it's human nature to want to be liked, and want to be wanted
Going on a diet is the last thing you should do. It's the last thing any of us should do, honestly. In fact it's been medically proven that 95% of people who go on a diet to lose weight end up gaining that weight back, because restrictive diets *don't work*. The vast majority of us are not going to change our bodies, and unless it's medically necessary for quality of life, we shouldn't be trying to change our bodies.
The key, my dear, is to change how you see yourself. Find love in your body. You CAN love yourself exactly as you are, it just takes effort and time! The progress I've made in the last few years is IMMENSE, and compared to how much I hated myself ten years ago? I'm thriving
I still have my moments, anon, where I see things in myself I don't like. I have my insecurities. I see people I think are far more beautiful and perfect than me and I get jealous and sad. But I work to change how I *feel*, not how I look. Not who I am.
I'm beautiful, anon, and so are you. I hope you learn to see that
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foxandfall · 9 days ago
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what black tar heroin did they put in vintage story to make me see one video then immediately buy and play it for hours no breaks
this is everything i missed from playing minecraft for the first time, everything i wanted RLCraft to be, and everything i almost got from don't starve rolled into one. like one big beautiful love letter to survival horror that feels tailor-made for me, specifically. and it's beautiful. it's a gorgeous game. from the sound design, to graphics, to UI. it's beautiful.
everything is so so hard but i have never felt more rewarded by a game in all my life. i nearly cried tears of joy after finding clay for the first time after searching for it for a full in-game week. i was manic giggling once i set all my pit kilns going with every damned ceramic i had been wanting. i rejoiced with unabashed glee at my first cooking pot meal. I can't even be mad when i die. i'm having fun sifting fucking sand. something i hated when it was part of every minecraft modpack i played. but here i love it. i love that every bit of progress is worked for. that every success is carved out with clawed fingers. and every milestone feels so grounded and based in logic that reading the handbook just feels like. well yes of course. the fact that bandages are made with horsetail, which i remembered as a healing herb from the fucking warrior cats books of all things. it's just so satisfying. i love it.
anyway tldr please play vintage story if you like survival and horror and challenge like me. or if you've ever watched a primitive technology video. it's so fun.
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shapelytimber · 7 months ago
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Wanted to paint some of my favorite characters, nothing more nothing less
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[COMMISSIONS]
Way too much yapping like an embarrassing amount, the individual portraits and the template I used below vvv
I shouldn't be allowed to talk about my favorite characters- especially to people who (presumably) don't know them xjfkdk apart from the very popular ones ofc
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ILLYA KURYAKIN (The man from U.N.C.L.E)
gay ass little Russian spy I love him he is so *dramatic* and a huge nerd and a Beatles fan and into fashion design- perfect pocket size blorbo ;w; also seeing a Russian character being given a positive leading role in an American tvshow from the 60s ?? Yes he lives in New York and works for UNCLE America.... But he is still a communist ?? Incredible ! Also I really like the fact he isn't given the cliché personality traits often given to Russian characters i e anger issues drinks a lot violent ect (looking at you shitty(imo) modern remake... What did you do to my little guy ;;). In a close contest with Spock for the "gayest man from tvshow" of the 60s..... And in my heart he is winning djdkd for me the gay subtext of muncle hits so much more because it's not a scifi show- it's closer to home, Napoleon and Illya were *like that* in the present day of the 60s, they were both human, and no alien fuckery made them go to the village more than once or play house in the suburbs or get attached ass up to get pegged on a regular basis... Truly a show that feels written by an old queen and a guy with the biggest fem dom fetish jkvjjkb (don't get me wrong tho I adore star trek tos and spirk too <3)
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KUROO HAZAMA and PINOKO (Black Jack)
sometimes I rewatch some of the oavs from the 90s when I'm sad :) I had a huge phase a couple years back when I read nearly all the manga (should really finish it... Or reread the whole thing frankly), watched *all* the shows (bar young black jack, hated that shit) and idk I just love this venal bitch so much- him and his daughter and his conflicted feelings for his tboy ex that he still loves kfkfkf btw I'm dying for a modern take on this like please please please I'd love to see Kei Kisaragi's story rewritten a bit (trans character in the 70s sure was progressive but oh boy-), because him and black jack's relationship makes me so *weak*.... And maybe see him a bit more than in one story- anyway ! When it comes to his daughter Pinoko, it's very hit or miss- when the writers lean on the cute father adoptive daughter relationship it's great, when they lean more on the whole "she has a crush on him" (very much like a child in most case, and he *never* reciprocate thank god) and bring up the fact she is technically 18 a lot (she was an evil tumor trapped in her sister before he created a body for her- black jack shit dw), and she gets jealous of other women.... Well it's terrible and I'm uncomfy :(
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EVA KANT (Diabolik)
Look.... You just can't show me danger diabolik 1968 and not expect me to become insane djdkdkdk she is so cool ;; !!! Her and her devious eel of a man (here as a panther, because even tho I haven't read the comic yet, I'm taking an educated guess that all the panther imagery is here to represent him, the lethal twunk always in the all black gimp suit... And if it's not then fuck my entire life ig fjfkkd), the cuntiest het couple you've ever seen, such freaks I love them ! Partners in crime that will blow up the tax offices of the whole country if you try to put a bounty on them <3 they are in the guilty faves category only because I'm this invested in these characters after 1 (one) movie fkfkf watched the first two remakes and was hmmm let's say underwhelmed, could have been worse but going after the 60s one ie peak cinema was hard... I went in fully invested in these heterosexuals and they still fucked up their romance and relationship ;; (don't spoil me the third one btw haven't seen it yet ! I know it's the yaoi one- which doesn't give me much hope for Eva tbh...) I'll soon start reading the comics tho ! Managed to find all twelve volumes of "Il grande Diabolik" in french for pretty cheap so I'm excited for that :D (might scan them and upload them online because omg I tried finding scans in *any* language and only found a dubious website that sold digital copies for 7€ a volume ??? What is this)
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UTA (The Void / Тургор / Turgor / Tension)
Apathy girlyyyyy she just like me for real for real nfkfk what absolutely charmed me about her is yes her design, but more importantly her chamber's design (if you've never played the void, a sister's chamber is a space that represent her. You get a sense of who she is by exploring her chamber before finding her and talking to her soul it's great). The lonely island out at sea, her laying down on a suspended steel boat in a grotto, looking passively at the moon by a crack on the ceiling.... And the moon is looking back. Incredible ! I love this game so much
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KIM KITSURAGI (Disco Elysium)
Do I really have to explain this one ? When I played the game with quiji I remember I kept saying "when Kim talks, we *listen*" djkdk we did get a good grade in Kim Kitsuragi and got him to dance in the church <3 this fucking centrist cop wormed it's way into my heart and many others because of course he did. The only Kim K in my eyes. Also funny anecdote : before I played Disco Elysium, I had one concept art masterclass where a kinda famous concept artist came to give advice, make us really stressed then give us a shitty grade.... And when I tell you this man looked so much like Kim ??? Same haircut, glasses, face with a scar *exactly* where Kim's portrait has a stark shadow on his cheek and he was dressed in an orange top- truly uncanny. Anyway, Kim is so fucking cool how does he do it
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DARK VADOR (La guerre des étoiles)
*sight* not surprising if you know me... and to be clear when I say Vader I don't mean Anakin Skywalker, post barbecue only zouz here. I refuse to yap about this man djdkdk I already do that way to much in ao3 comment sections
And here is the template I used ! Don't know who made it tho sorry...
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PS : all these where made in 2-3 hours each :D wanted to challenge myself by painting quickly, and I mostly (looking at the Eva Kant one that gave me trouble) succeeded !
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