#yap yap yapping

[starscelly]

miro getting married in italy almost exactly a year after roope got married in italy is like hey …… hey u cant get anymore inside of each others skin actually <3 did u know <3

[nyaboshi]

Please yap about Achlys, I want to know everything

OIB;OWJ BITING YOU /affec I WOULD LOVE TO TALK ABOUT MY BABY BOY

Everything is below the cut, because this is about to get long. Teehee~

I saw this ask when you originally sent it, anon, but the reason it's taken me so long to respond is because I was rushing to get this done:

A brand new, shiny reference for my boy! Wings colored and everything, finally!! I wanted to reveal this while simultaneously answering your ask, causeee I have a lot to say about this goober.

First off, I'll start with backstory. Achlys was a character I created for a roleplay with a friend of mine, and he hasssss... spiraled. I love him so much, he's my precious little bean.

He was created in a lab by a scientist named Xander, who was obsessed with creating human hybrids and monstrosities in attempts to create the perfect soldiers. All of his attempts in the past had proven to be too unstable and unfit for actual battle. At some point, Xander came to the conclusion that it was because he was adding DNA to human beings who had already existed. His new priority became to gather the DNA of an individual and use it to make a clone that he would then mix with the DNA. Achlys was the first product of this experimental process (at least the first to not die immediately after being "born"). Xander started with something as simple as the DNA of a butterfly, just to see what it would be like if such an experiment succeeded. What Xander did not expect was to become emotionally attached to the kid. He raised him for a few years, and he eventually because like a father to him. After an altercation with his nefarious works that nearly cost him Achlys' life, he gave up his dangerous and illegal practices, faked his death so the authorities wouldn't be after him, and started a new life with his child.

Achlys grew up within a morally gray household. Although Xander taught him morals to prevent him from getting on the bad side of the law – both because he didn't want Achlys to grow up to be like him (huzzah, character development!) and because trouble with the law meant Achlys being discovered and likely hauled away/killed – that didn't stop Achlys from becoming a bit of a troublemaker. He's loud-mouthed, manipulative at times, and generally kinda self-centered. Achlys definitely isn't afraid to tell minor fibs to get what he wants, and he can and will pull out the good ol' puppy dog eyes on his poor old papá to get him to cave. Xander is somewhat immune to it by the time Achlys hits his mid teenage years. But not completely. Despite his iffy morals though, he's generally a good kid. All of his stuff adds up to petty actions only. If he ever actually got pushed to do anything truly evil, he'd just kinda stand there and likely have a panic attack. Ironically enough, Achlys is easily manipulated. All it takes is flattery and the promise of something sweet and he'll be eating out of the palm of your hand. That's only for first time interactions, though. If you take that opportunity and use it to wrong him, hoof... Once Achlys trust is broken, it is ridiculously hard to earn it back. ANOTHER IMPORTANT DETAIL!!! He is such a dummy. Like. My gosh, somebody help this child... He can't do basic math for the life of him, and not from lack of Xander trying to teach him. Achlys just refuses to pay attention to anything that doesn't interest him unless it's what he deems as super important. And... schooling was not one of those things. He did enough to get by and then it went right out his other ear. Bro can count, but like– If you asked him what 12 x 9 was he'd just sit there and stare at you blankly. The only subject in school he took an interest to was science – it made him feel connected with Xander, cause that's his father's passion. Does he understand a lick of what's being said to him? Not really, no. But does he actually try to listen and learn for once so he can assist him in the "completely safe" experiments he conducts? Of course! On that note, Achlys thinks the world of Xander. His father's opinion is really the only one he cares about. Achlys can get berated by a horde of angry Karens and not give two shakes of a rat's tail; however, the moment Xander does so much as raises his voice at him, he shrinks and turns into a puddle of tears. Never in front of Xander. He holds his ground until he's alone in his room. Then he curls up underneath his covers (or under the bed, depends on how badly he was lectured) and wallows. There's no greater achievement to Achlys than receiving Xander's praise and approval. Which he does receive often, because Xander adores his little sharp-toothed shark child.

ANYWHOZZLE This got real long. XD

I have much more to say in terms of character arcs I have planned out in my noggin for him as well as anatomy headcanons and thoughts I chew on like fruit gummies. But I will leave it at that for now

Once again, thank you so much for the ask, anon! I hope you continue to love him as much as I do (if such a feat is possible, I'm tear him to shreds regularly like a dog /affec)

[starscelly]

[starscelly]

theyre redoing tsegs91 homophobia accusations on twitter in the year of our lord 2025

[starscelly]

making capfriendly private, videos on the nhl site not working after a few years, there being no way to even pay to watch past games… rip nhl you would have loved the burning of the library of alexandria

[starscelly]

how am i expected to "go out and meet people" and "date" when there is so much hockey to watch and so little time. i'm supposed to make time for another person when i've already got at least 23 men to keep track of in my phone?

[starscelly]

had back to back customers the other day where one left by calling me "such a nice young man, you're a good boy" and the next one left saying "have a blessed day ma'am" . literally the boyfriend who looks like a girlfriend that the killers discussed

[starscelly]

well. theres a lot of pride in our path here. we made it through col missing our best forward and dman. we made it through the presidents trophy winners with so many guys fresh back from injury. every year it always feels like we have The hardest path to the cup and i hope next year is different but i guess i'll always be hoping hoping hoping the path is different and i don't know when it will be!

regardless. there will be more seasons. there will be more love. there will be seasons where miro will be healthy and robo will be healthy and maybe we won't have an evil backup goalie. things will be different but our core will be the same. our future can always stay bright. i don't know what we need to change at this point and i know its not my job to know.

i love you stars lb! it's been another beautiful season with you guys. there's the endless ups and downs. i got to go to dallas this year! and hopefully there will be more of that! and maybe one day i'll get to see them not lose late late into the playoffs. but that year is just not this year.

love y'all <3

[starscelly]

fuck mee dude if i knew the stars were gonna be hunting for a new head coach i wouldnt have gotten my new fucking job fuuuckkk meeeee what am i supposed to say now when jim calls FUCK

[starscelly]

my roommate has had to live with me for 2 looong years (for her). she has heard a lot about hockey. she has been to 2 games. this is her guessing team names based off of logos*

*i let her ask if they were canadian or american, sometimes west/east north/south if she was really struggling but felt close, and if there were teams where i had to edit out all the text and it left like nothing (utah, washington) she was able to ask a few questions about geography and random letters

[starscelly]

is there a man who loves standing in such a way to accentuate his itty bitty waist even in full gear more than roope

[starscelly]

otter needs to stop befriending eccentric forwards and accept the dmen who desire him carnally into his social circle more thoroughly . tharls55 has wanted to fuck you for like 5 years my friend . open your heart

[starscelly]

help why did the nhlsuomi acct crop out esa

pride months over this is unreal behavior

[starscelly]

oh ENOUGH

[starscelly]

also we Know my feelings abt him in general so please Know how sincere this is but over the course of this season i rlly have respected jamie as a captain and player more and how much he's embraced his changing role with a lot of grace. and there's Problems with him as a player but i've really grown a new layer of appreciation for him as a leader and as a vet. and as someone who genuinely cares about this city like his #1 goal always is with the city of dallas in mind