#yeah I know Walmart bad
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big-tiddy-goth-ghoulfriend · 3 months ago
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Question for people who do/have work/ed for Walmart online grocery pick-up: are y'all told to pick the wilted brown mushy produce? My theory is that management knows in-store shoppers are gonna buy the stuff with the longest expiration date and looks the freshest, but the online orders don't get a say in what they're buying and often don't see the produce until they're already home. So you can just unload the on-the-fence stuff on them and they won't bother to do anything about it.
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britneyshakespeare · 9 months ago
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without doubt one of the worst things about bratz dolls is that you cannot display them without shoes bc they look weird as fuck. stumpy ass bitches
#tales from diana#i bought some bratz w a walmart giftcard my brother got me for my birthday... like months ago#my birthday is in april so i probably bought them like may or june#i opened yasmin today and i really gotta wash her hair it's a gelly mess#lookin like a rat's nest fuckin... it's bad mga wtf#it's the forever bratz yasmin from this year btw not a reproduction#i did also get the reproduction of campfire felicia bc it was also there and the same price#and like honestly she was lookin so cute and tbh she was a better deal lol she came w two outfits so yeah#you know yasmin was my favorite design of the forever bratz but the doll itself is somewhat cheaper than i was expecting her to be#ppl always praise mga for having higher quality than playline barbie these days but like... i kept thinking#hmmm if this had come out in the 2000s this doll would've had a fabric purse and not a hard plastic one#this lace on the front would actually be able to open and not just be glued there#whatever she's still cute i really love her#but i did have that first experience in such a long time. like since childhood. where i just take off some bratz shoes#and i'm like NO FEET! NO FEET! NO FEET! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH#PUT IT BACK!!!!!!#they look more than just naked. they look injured#i used to treat my bratz clothing completely differently than my barbie clothing as a kid bc they felt so much less interchangeable lol#i had a million barbies and a million barbie outfits and i really did not care to keep anything on a particular doll#w my couple of bratz that i had in childhood i really had to be careful where those outfit pieces ended up. couldnt leave em undressed#i suppose that still hasn't changed#you know one of these days i have to get myself a new funk-n-glow jade. she was my first bratz#but also one of these days....... i gotta wash yasmin's hair 😒
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cheapbutitglows · 2 years ago
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people really don’t know how to act on tiktok like these assholes are beyond help at this point. filming other people without their consent and posting it under the guise of “upholding justice” and “exposing cheaters and bullies!!!” or whatever like quite frankly if you’re saying shit like “if i catch a [bad person doing bad thing] i would film them, post it on tiktok, find out where they work and live and EXPOSE 👏 THEIR 👏 UGLY 👏 ASS👏! they DESERVE to have their life ruined! #girlboss” you are not a good person you’re vile you’re disgusting and you should be severely embarassed and ashamed of yourself.
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femme-enby · 4 days ago
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“Two days off, one day on, then two days off??? I’m gonna use the second two days to write!”
*nearly severs my entire fuckin fingerprint off w a floor scraper*
“Ah.”
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mooningningg · 1 month ago
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 notes, i was actually chuckling at myself. ty anon for requesting
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★ Roommate!Sukuna when someone hits on you with him.
You were just comparing the backs of two cereal boxes.
Really. That’s all.
You and Sukuna had run out of coffee creamer and got distracted in the cereal aisle. You were bickering about marshmallow-to-grain ratios like civilized adults when Sukuna walked off to grab eggs and left you behind.
Now here you were, alone, mid-comparison, when a guy sidled up beside you.
Not aggressively. Just… with a little too much confidence for someone in a Walmart.
He gestured to the cereal in your hand and said, “You know that one has more sugar than the one you’re holding?”
You blinked.
“…Yeah, that’s why I picked it.”
He laughed. The kind of laugh that people do when they’re trying too hard. “You’re funny. That your favorite?”
You didn’t answer right away. There wasn’t anything threatening about him — just annoying. Vaguely frat-boy energy in board shorts and a fake chain. He leaned in a little.
“You know,” he said, flashing a grin, “I was actually gonna say something earlier when you passed the produce section. Couldn’t help noticing your smile.”
Jesus Christ.
You gave a polite, tight smile. “Thanks.”
“Got a name, pretty girl?”
You were about to lie and say “Tax Fraud” when—
“The fuck’s goin’ on here?”
A voice cut in. Low, scratchy, and pissed.
You didn’t have to turn around to know who it was.
Sukuna was back.
And he was standing behind you with a carton of eggs in one hand, a frozen bag of fries in the other, and a look on his face like he was ready to use either as a weapon.
The guy glanced up, eyebrows raised. “Uh—hey, man. Just talkin’ to her—”
“Yeah?” Sukuna cocked his head. “Looks more like you’re talkin’ at her.”
You tried to step in, raise a hand. “It’s fine—”
Sukuna didn’t look at you. Didn’t blink. He took a step forward, close enough that the guy had to instinctively lean back.
“She look interested to you?”
“Woah, okay—” the guy laughed awkwardly, taking a visible step away. “Didn’t mean to disrespect—”
Sukuna gave a humorless snort. “Disrespect?” he echoed, loud enough to make an old lady from aisle six poke her head around. His tone was slow, like he was tasting the word and hating every syllable. “Nah. See, disrespect is when you bump someone in line and don’t say ‘scuse me.’”
He stepped closer. The eggs in his hand were tilted sideways now, as if he had no problem letting them crash to the floor if things went south. “What you just did?” His grin spread, but it didn’t touch his eyes. “That’s some ‘I wanna die in aisle seven’ type shit.”
The guy laughed nervously, eyes darting toward you. “I didn’t know she was with anyone—”
“You don’t need to know,” Sukuna said, voice low, like a fuse being lit. “You see someone standing alone, you keep walkin’. You don’t roll up with your Dollar Tree smile and ask her what cereal she likes.”
You winced. Ouch.
“Bro, it’s not that serious—”
“Don’t ‘bro’ me,” Sukuna snapped, finally breaking eye contact with the man long enough to glance at you. His voice dipped. “You good?”
You blinked. “I—yeah. I was just looking at cereal—”
His eyes flicked back to the guy. “Yeah? She was looking at cereal. Not you.”
The dude threw his hands up. “Alright man, alright. My bad. Enjoy your, uh… whatever this is.”
He turned, practically sprinted out of the aisle, knocking into a soup display on his way out. A can rolled across the tile floor like a dramatic punctuation mark.
Silence.
You blinked at Sukuna. He still looked vaguely pissed. He glanced down at the eggs in his hand like he was debating whether or not to chase the guy and throw them.
Instead, he tossed them into the basket and finally turned toward you.
“You’re unbelievable,” you muttered.
He raised an eyebrow. “What?”
“You can’t threaten people in public just because they talk to me.”
“He flirted with you.”
“I can handle myself.”
“You shouldn’t have to.”
The words came out too fast. Too serious. Even he looked surprised he said them.
You paused, one eyebrow raised. “We’re just roommates, you know.”
He exhaled slowly, dragging a hand down his face. “Yeah, yeah. You tell everyone that.”
“I am everyone.”
He scoffed, reaching for a box of cereal and dropping it in your cart without looking. “Shut up.”
You glanced at the box.
It was the one you wanted.
You smiled to yourself and didn’t say a word.
But damn, you were never grocery shopping without him again.
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Taglist, @humeysaga.
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lucielovekj · 2 years ago
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I loathe how much people struggling w hygiene is such a sticking point in these conversations, how it’s like one of the most known and common symptoms of basically every mental illness and yet it stalls literally every conversation asking people to not actively abuse us for being mentally ill.
I’m lucky, during those times I’ve always been able to shower and dress myself when I’ve needed to, I’ve never been forced to actually go anywhere like that…but people act like someone being so miserable and so detached from themselves that they can’t even bring themselves to perform basic self care is 1. A personal attack on them which they’re justified in retaliating for, 2. A personal choice they’re intentionally making and 3. Something which makes someone less of a human being and less deserving of compassion and respect.
Like yeah standing behind someone in line at Walmart who smells funky isn’t fun, but I promise you whatever they’re going through that’s caused it is a million times worse and harder than the 30 seconds of mild, escapable discomfort you felt. I promise you they know they’re not doing great, they’re absolutely sorry, they definitely feel bad about it, you don’t need to make it worse. They don’t wanna be that in that place any more than you do. It costs nothing to just have some compassion for them.
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dilf-hunter-fantasies · 7 months ago
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fantasizing about…
Sneaking filthy mouthed dbf!joel miller into your dorm room to fuck you on your xl twin size bed in front of your ten dollar Walmart floor length mirror.
2.7k words 🍒 warnings: explicit smut, no outbreak, age gap, female reader, f masturbation, size kink, pussy pronouns, unprotected piv, creampie, use of: daddy, darlin', girl, baby, praise and teasing
click here for more of my writing
shout out to everyone who supported my first little fic about bf joel!
let me know if you wanna be tagged for more joel fantasies
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Joel grumbled and fussed the whole way up the back stairwell when you snuck him onto your floor. And it was so late you didn’t even have to bribe a friend to run interference with your RA. And when you get into your closet sized room and lock the door he has more complaints!
Bitching about how he’s too old to be sneaking around and worrying about some 20 year old kicking him out. His gravelly drawl is music to your ears though, even if he’s got nothing positive to say.
“Joel,” you warn, but the way your name falls from his lips a second later unravels you completely.
“C’mere, sweetheart,” he murmurs, hooking a finger into the waistband of your sweatpants. He tugs you closer, his free hand sliding under your shirt to rest warm against the small of your back.
“Missed you.” It’s a whisper when you let the words slip out.
“I know,” he rumbles back at you.
You don’t linger on his response thought, not with his mouth already brushing against yours, rough and sure and utterly Joel. You kiss him back, hard and needy, tangling your fingers in his soft curls.
His growl hums low in his chest as his hands gripped your hips, firm and possessive, steering you back until the edge of your bed hit the backs of your knees.
Then he’s slipping his hand into your sweats and nothing else matters but the touch of his rough, working man hands against your smooth skin. When he dips beneath the hem of your panties you gasp and he chuckles, a low, husky sound.
“Shit, darlin’,” he rasps. “She missed me that bad? Got ya tremblin’ already?”
“I told you I missed you.” You make a pouty frown in the dim light.
“You still ain’t find a college boy to keep her purrin’?”
“Fuck n-no,” you choke out the last word as his hand skims lower. “Need a real man.”
“Yeah,” he reluctantly grumbles, “and here I am, at your beck and call.”
When his thick fingers part your slick folds, your breath catches in your throat. When Joel finds just how fucking wet you are for him a scowl depends the lines of his face.
“Oh, this is bad, sweetheart,” he grumbles.
“Bad?”
“Yeah, ya know…bad. As in, no good? Thought you had to be smart to get into college?” He mocks you with his low, manly drawl. But at the same time, he drags his slick coated fingers from your messy entrance to your clit.
Your knees start to wobble. You got so caught up the second he touched you that you’d froze in place, just standing there dumbly while his hand dove between your legs. Weakly, your dig your fingers into his soft flannel shirt for support, biting down on your lip to dampen a moan when he starts rubbing circles around your throbbing bundle of nerves.
“You been neglecting her all week? She’s gushin’ on me like she never been touched by a man before, and we both know that ain’t true.
“No,” you argue weakly, eyes fluttering shut as he works you with the precision of a man who knows exactly what you need. “Jus’ not the same as when you do it.” 
He retracts his hand, your waistband snaps back, and you glare at him for edging you like that. “Hey—” 
“Show me.”
“No, Joel, please.” You whine needily, “Need your fingers or,” you rest your hand over the bulge in his jeans, giving it a gentle squeeze. Your next words come out as a whipser. “Or this.” 
He exhales slowly and you can feel the air in the room shifting. A stern look pulls his brows together and his eyes are dark as midnight. “You gonna argue with your Daddy now, girl?” 
Your face flushes with heat, cheeks burning at the question, and your cunt clenches so hard you squirm. You’ve almost let it slip a few times, but you’ve never called him Daddy before. Not in all the hookups you’ve had since that first summer night. The night when you’d both crossed the line you’ll never regret. 
You shake your head.
“Use your words now, darlin’. I know you can do it.” 
You take a breath to steady yourself before continuing. “M’sorry, Daddy. Not gonna argue, just need you bad.” 
“C’mere,” he says, sitting on the edge of your twin sized mattress. He pats his lap, expectantly. You move to straddle his lap, but he stops you. 
“No, baby,” he spins you by the hips, “face forward. You’re gonna show me how you take care of her when I’m not around. But I’ll letcha sit on my lap.”
Joel’s hands move deliberately, peeling your shirt off and tugging your sweats down, leaving you completely bare. He stays fully dressed, the rough fabric of his jeans brushing against the soft skin of your thighs as he pulls you onto his lap. The thick bulge pressing against your bare ass makes you moan, grinding against him instinctively. His hands grip your hips tightly, holding you still.
“Easy, baby,” he rasps, his breath hot against your neck. “Ain’t even started yet, and you’re already so needy.”
His lips trail over your shoulder, his stubble scraping your skin as he kisses and bites, marking you with soft growls of approval. One of his hands moves up, cupping your breast, his fingers pinching and rolling your nipple while the other slides between your legs.
“Go on,” he rumbles against your ear. “Let Daddy see how she likes it.”
Your cheeks burn, but you obey, your fingers trembling as they find your clit. Joel watches in the mirror across from the bed, his dark eyes locking on yours as you rub slow, teasing circles over your swollen bundle of nerves.
“Look at that,” he says, his voice low and rough. “That’s real pretty, darlin’.”
Joel’s grip tightens on your hips as your fingers work your clit, his eyes fixed on the mirror. His voice is rough, almost taunting. “Don’t be shy now, girl. I know you’ve done this before. Bet you’ve been thinkin’ about me every time, haven’t you?”
You whimper, your motions faltering, but Joel doesn’t let up. His hand slides up to your breast, squeezing hard enough to make you gasp. “Keep goin’. Don’t make me do all the work.”
Your reflection in the mirror is a mess—skin beading with sweat, mouth parted, your body trembling on his lap. Joel’s gaze stays glued to it, and he smirks. “There she is. Knew you’d be a good girl if I told you how.”
His free hand moves down, gripping your thigh as you rub faster, the pleasure building unbearably. He leans in, his lips brushing against your ear. “Don’t stop until I tell you. Wanna see exactly how you make yourself cum when I’m not around.”
Your fingers move faster, the slick sounds filling the room, and Joel’s grip on your thigh tightens. “That’s it,” he growls. “Look at yourself. Drippin’ all over me like the needy little thing you are.”
The tension in your body coils tighter, and a soft cry escapes your lips as you teeter on the edge. Joel’s smirk deepens, and he leans closer, his breath hot against your neck. “Don’t hold back now. Make a fuckin’ mess for me.”
Your body obeys, the pleasure cresting all at once as your orgasm tears through you. Your legs shake, and you gasp, grinding helplessly against Joel’s lap as your fingers work frantically. He chuckles low and dark, watching you ride out your high.
“Good girl,” he rasps, his voice dripping with satisfaction. “Knew you had it in you. But don’t think we’re done yet.”
He shifts his hips, the thick bulge in his jeans pressing harder against your bare, oversensitive core. His hands skim up to your tits, squeezing roughly as he murmurs, “Gonna give you something to think about the next time she’s achin’ for me and I’m not here.”
You’re still shaky when the words slip out, breathless and desperate. “Need you inside me, Daddy.” 
Joel groans, his hands gripping your hips tightly as he presses you down harder against his lap. “Already beggin’? Thought you’d last a little longer than this.” 
“Can’t,” you whimper, your voice breaking. “Need it bad.” 
He chuckles darkly, his lips curling into a smirk. 
He shifts you forward, and the sound of his zipper echoes in the small room as he frees himself from his jeans. The thick, flushed length of his cock presses against your folds, and you shudder, the heat and size of him making you ache with anticipation. 
Joel strokes himself lazily, dragging the tip through your slick, and growls low in his throat. “Gonna stretch this tight little pussy so good, you’ll be feelin’ me for days.” 
“Please,” you whisper again, your hand reaching back to grip his wrist. “I’m ready.” 
“Ready?” He laughs, the sound rough and mocking. “Look at her, baby. She’s so fuckin’ desperate she’s droolin’ on me. You think she’s ready?”
Joel doesn’t wait for your answer. His grip on your hips tightens, and he shifts you just enough to line himself up. The blunt head of his cock presses against your entrance, catching on your slick folds as he holds you there, teasing. 
“Yeah,” he mutters, dragging his tip up and down and smearing your wetness along his huge, veiny shaft. “She’s so fuckin’ messy already, and I haven’t even started.” 
You try to sink down, but his hands keep you still. “Ah, ah,” he chides. 
“We do this how I say. Gotta let Daddy ease you open first.” His tone and the way he takes control makes your eyes nearly roll back. And then he starts to work his fat cock into your warm, wet cunt. 
The first push is devastating. 
Joel groans as the thick head of his cock stretches you wide, your body resisting before giving way, inch by inch. It’s such an intense sensory experience. He’s so hard you can feel his pulse in his dick, every pump of blood beating a steady rhythm as your body adjusts to the intrusion.  
The stretch burns, overwhelming and perfect all at once, and you gasp, your nails digging into his thighs for balance. “Fuck, baby,” he growls, his voice tight. “She’s so tight, it’s like she’s never been fucked before.” 
You can only nod, your breath hitching as he sinks deeper, the obscene wet sounds filling the air. Joel watches the mirror, his dark eyes glued to where his cock disappears into you, stretching you wide. 
“Look at her,” he grunts, his hand sliding up your stomach to grip your chin. He tilts your head forward, forcing your gaze to the reflection. “Watch how she takes me. Watch how fuckin’ perfect she looks creamin’ all over my cock.”
Joel’s hips flex, driving himself deeper, and your jaw drops at the sheer fullness, the way he stretches you far past what should be possible. 
“That’s it,” he grunts, his voice raspy and uneven. “Takin’ me so fuckin’ good, baby. Thought this little college pussy couldn’t handle it, but look at her. Greedy as hell.” 
The mirror captures everything—the way your body shudders with each push, the shiny mess coating his thick length as it glides in and out, and the dark, possessive look in Joel’s eyes as he watches you take him. 
His words register dimly in your mind, making you giggle as you bounce on him. “You’re such a dirty old man. Probably been dreaming for–ah–for ages about having your own college slut to fuck.” 
He growls, one hand sliding to your lower stomach. He presses down just enough to make you gasp. “You said ya wanted a man, now you’ve got one inside you…so, watch.” 
Your head lolls against him, but you watch in the mirror. Where he’s drilling into your sloppy, drooling cunt.
“Feel how deep I am? Fuckin’ you so good you’ll feel me in your guts tomorrow.” 
You whimper, your body clenching around him, and Joel laughs low in his chest. “Shit, you like that, don’t you? Filthy girl. Sittin’ here on Daddy’s cock, makin’ a fuckin’ mess.” His rhythm picks up, the sounds of skin slapping and your breathless moans filling the room. 
Joel’s hand dips between your legs, his rough fingers finding your clit and circling it just hard enough to make your thighs quiver. “Rub it for me,” he orders, his voice dark and commanding. “Wanna feel you gush while I’m buried in this tight little cunt.”
He’s fucking you so deep you swear you can feel his dick in your lungs. All you can do is pant out desperate moans and curses, getting more and more frantic as he drives up into you.
“Fuck, holy s-shit, oh, oh, oh my god Joel, I-I’m gonna cum,”
You’re nearly wailing the closer you get. You can’t restrain your voice anymore. Not when the only thing you can think--no--the only thing that exists, is the sweet bliss when he hits that perfect spot inside of you. Your fingers work furiously, chasing the release, the pressure in you has you strung taut, ready to snap—or scream. 
Joel clamps a massive hand over your mouth, his palm pressing firmly against your lips. The sharp, possessive motion sends a shudder down your spine, and your cunt clenches around him so hard he groans.
“Quiet,” he rasps, his breath hot against your ear. “Don’t need the whole fuckin’ dorm wakin’ up just to hear you screamin’ my name.” 
You moan, muffled by his big hand, and gush around his cock at the thought of people hearing both of you. 
His voice dips lower, laced with dark amusement. “Or maybe you do. Huh? Wanna let all the boys on campus know exactly who fucks this pussy? Who you’re Daddy is?”
The taunt pushes you right over the edge. Your body spasms violently as your orgasm slams into you, your walls pulsing around him like a vice. You’re soaking him and dripping onto his thighs, the wet, filthy sound driving his hips even harder.
“Oh, fuck,” Joel groans, his rhythm faltering as he feels you milking his cock. “You’re fuckin’ unreal, baby. Such a dirty little thing. Can’t get enough, can you?”
Your head is spinning, your body limp against his as the waves of pleasure roll through you. Joel doesn’t let up, though, his thrusts relentless.
“Fuck, baby,” he growls, his voice thick and strained. “She’s fuckin’ sopping wet, clenching so tight.”
Joel’s grip tightens on your hips, his fingers digging into your skin as he pounds into you, harder and faster. The wet, obscene sound of his cock driving into your soaked cunt fills the room, and the pressure in his movements tells you he’s close.
“You feel that?” he rasps, his hand slipping from your mouth to cup your jaw, tilting your head so you can see the mirror. “Look at her, baby. Look how perfect she looks takin’ every inch of me. This pussy was made for me.”
You’re too far gone to respond, your lips parted and your breath coming in shallow pants. But the way your body contracts around him is answer enough, and Joel curses low under his breath, his thrusts growing erratic.
“Gonna fill you up,” he grunts. 
With one final thrust, he buries himself as deep as he can go, his cock twitching inside you as he spills hot and thick ropes of cum, filling you to the brim. The heat of his release pushes you into another shuddering climax, your body clutching him so tightly, milking every last drop.
Joel stays still for a moment, his chest heaving against your back. His lips brush against your ear, and he murmurs, “Mine. All fuckin’ mine.”
He dips his head, kissing and nipping at your neck, the hinge of your jaw, along the top of  your shoulder. Your breathing starts to settle as he soothes you with his ministrations. When he sucks hard enough to leave a mark on your shoulder, you smile dazedly, unbothered. 
You hope he marks every inch of your flesh. 
Because you are his. 
And you wish everyone could know. 
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sturniololuvz · 2 months ago
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daisy having a tantrum in public?
🍼teendad!chris
Walmart was already too bright, too crowded, too loud. Chris didn’t even want to be there — but Nick had asked, and Matt said it wouldn’t take long. So Chris had hauled Daisy out the door, already cranky, blanket forgotten on the couch, and a bottle only half full.
She started whining in the car. And she didn’t stop.
By the time they were halfway through the snack aisle, Daisy was full-on crying on Chris’s hip — not tantrum-style, but that slow, loud, miserable toddler cry that just spirals. Her face was blotchy, nose running, little fists pushing against Chris’s chest as she whined nonsense through her tears.
“I don’t wanna be here anymore,” she mumbled, breath hiccuping.
Chris bounced her automatically, trying to keep his voice low. “I know, but we’re almost done. Just a few more minutes.”
“No!” she screeched, smacking her hand against his collarbone. “Down!”
Chris started to crouch, but the second her feet touched the floor, Daisy arched her back and cried louder. “Upppp!”
Matt watched from the cart, quiet as usual, his eyes flicking between Daisy and Chris. “She’s overtired,” he muttered.
“No shit,” Chris snapped, rubbing his forehead. His arms were shaking from holding her for so long. “She’s been like this all damn day.”
“Need help?” Nick asked, but his tone wasn’t super serious — more like he was asking because he felt like he had to.
“No,” Chris said through clenched teeth, hoisting Daisy back up, but she started kicking immediately. “Daisy, stop!”
She was full-on crying now, face red, hands shoving at his chest, eyes squinting shut. And she would not stop squirming. She didn’t want up, she didn’t want down, she didn’t want water, and now she was yelling about her blanket again — the one they didn’t bring.
“Daisy, that’s enough!” Chris barked suddenly, his voice sharp and way too loud for the aisle. “Stop hitting me. Stop screaming. I’m done, Daisy. I’m done!”
She froze for a second — that little inhale toddlers do before the real cry starts — and then burst into a wail. But this time, it wasn’t frustrated or bratty. It was sad. She twisted in his arms and reached out her hands past him, sobbing through broken breaths: “Matttttyyyy!”
Matt’s eyes widened slightly, stepping forward. “Hey, hey,” he said gently, reaching out. “Come here, bug.”
Chris handed her over without a word — not because he wanted to, but because he couldn’t handle another second of her sobs in his ear. The second Matt took her, Daisy clung to him, her cries quieter but still steady, her face hidden in his shoulder.
“Dude,” Nick said under his breath, pulling Chris aside near the frozen foods. “You gotta calm down. She’s two.”
Chris ran a hand over his face, heart still racing. “I know, Nick. I know. But I haven’t slept, I’ve been holding her for an hour, and she’s been screaming in my face since breakfast.”
Matt rocked Daisy gently in the background, whispering to her while she curled into his hoodie.
“I’m not mad at you,” Nick said, softer now. “I’m just saying — she’s not trying to ruin your life, bro. She just doesn’t know how to say she’s tired.”
Chris leaned against the freezer door, eyes shutting for a second. His chest felt heavy, throat tight.
“I didn’t mean to yell like that,” he said quietly. “I just… lost it for a second.”
Nick patted his back. “It happens, man. We’ll finish fast. You go sit with her in the car.”
Chris nodded, swallowing hard. “Yeah. Okay.”
He looked back at Matt — still holding Daisy, still calm — and his heart kind of ached. He wasn’t a bad dad. He was also just tired.
taglist: @sturniolo-szn2 @fadedstvrn @tezzzzzzzz @stayingstromboli @ivysturnss @sturniolofreakk @ihateemetoo @sturniolo-tease @sturniololuv3r @sturnsclam @nxvasturns @csturniolo43 @mattspillowprincess @sturniolo-fann @izzylovesmatt @sturniolosymphony @bernardmatthews @bugs-tags @emely9274 @arianna1342 @stevielovesmatt @riggysworld @ph3ebssturniolo @whore4chris @amelia4chris @pizzapocketpocketpizza @strxn-2 @xxxxxxlovesstuff @whump-loverz @sarahsturnn @urloveanaa @k-pevensie28 @chrissturniolobendmeovernow @chriss-slutt @lenus1aa @kitty-meow-meow44 @sturnslux3 @blahbel668 @kingofeverythingmb @kenah-sturniolo
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lixies-favorite-cookie · 2 months ago
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🍪 — 𝐬𝐟𝐰 𝐚𝐥𝐩𝐡𝐚𝐛𝐞𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐡𝐨
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☕ — paring・minho x reader // genres・ fluff alphabet headcanons! // words・2.7k // warnings・mild cursing and kissing ig.
a/n・i finally wrote something everybody clap!! this was fun asf to write and i took it as a little challenge to myself to write for somebody other than felix. (should i make this a silly little series while i'm finishing up my felix bodyguard fic ((teaser here)) because this satiates my need to yap and share my opinions.) (credits to @vampzity for the idea <33) (((please ignore any errors. i spent 3 hours writing this and posted it at 4 a.m. as always, if there is any please make me aware!! thank you so much for reading my love and stay tuned for my new 1,000 followers event!!)))
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a — affection (how affectionate is he? how often does he show affection?)
minho is affectionate if you catch him at the right time. i don't think he'd be the type to throw his arms around you in the middle of walmart, but he'd brush the small of your back when somebody's close to you or interlock pinkies when walking down the aisle together. oh yeah, and he's totally the king of interlocking pinkies. he's interlocking pinkies at every public event, it doesn't matter where it is. around the boys, he'd probably pull you onto his lap and gently rub your thighs whenever you're talking. alone, i think that's when the affectionate minho starts coming out. he's a little more romantic, and a lot more shy.
b — beginning (what would he be like as a bsf; how would the friendship start?)
you were probably scared as shit to talk to him. he totally has this cold, intimidating vibe going on, but the moment, you, the most stunning person he's ever laid eyes on, starts talking to him—yeah, he's blushing like a maniac. he'd pretend to be all nonchalant knowing damn well that the moment you text him he's giggling and kicking his feet. he'd probably be all shy at first, never quite meeting your eyes and giving you small smiles at the start of your friendship, but oh, once you start getting comfortable with him, you realize how much of a menace he is. gives you butt taps all the time then blames it on a gobsmacked seungmin, hands raised and definitely terrified of you smacking him in the face. probably met at a grocery store or boba shop. still tries to act nonchalant, but the second you call him cute he's hiding his face in your neck.
c — cuddles (does he like to cuddle; how would he cuddle?)
speaking of hiding into necks. lee minho is a slut for cuddles, but he'd never actually admit that. he'd like it when you're laying on top of him, your warmth and heat surrounding him. extra points if your thighs are straddling him and your face is buried into his neck. chefs kiss. he'd be in a big hoodie, tired from a long day of slaying and drags you from the kitchen onto the couch and forces you to lay there (you love it) until you've both fallen asleep, the sound of your soft breaths and the smell of smoke coming from the cookies you abandoned. (nobody died in the making of this fanfic)
d — domestic (does he want to settle down? how good is he at cooking and cleaning?)
does minho wanna settle down? hmmm, i don't really know? i feel like with the right person yes, but far, far, farrrr into the future. it's already established that he's an amazing cook so he'd make you the most delicious, mouth watering meals you've ever tasted.
e — ending (if he had to break up with you, how would he do it?)
it all depends on the reason why you're breaking up. is it bad that i could imagine him doing it over text? if he's breaking up with you because of distance or if you did something crazy like cheating i feel like he'd definitely do it over text just because he'd be too emotionally exhausted to talk to you in person. if it was a mutual decision he would sit you down and have a conversation about it and then hold you while you both cry then agree to be there for each other no matter what.
f — fiancé (how does he feel about commitment; would he want to get married quick?)
minho wouldn't be the type to act off impulse, he'd definitely put a lot of thought into marriage. minho also wouldn't be the type to cheat so he knows that this commitment is forever, and wants to make sure you're ready for that. he would wait until it's the right time to propose. until, you're both in a good spot in your careers, your life, and your relationship. he would wait, but secretly, he's been wanting to marry you since he first heard the words "i love you". he would also psych himself out of it at least 12 times and go to chan for help. bonus: he'd propose on the bay with a picnic and a sunset, trees and flowers all around you. it would be downright magical.
g — gentle (how gentle is he; emotionally + physically?)
minho is such a baby at heart. he would be so gentle with you emotionally and physically. he would be the type to apologize a million different times if he accidentally hurts you and holds you close to his chest if you ever start crying. he might not be able to express his emotions very well, but he'd hold yours like they are the most precious thing in the world to him. he's so careful with your heart. RAAAA i literally love him so much he's my shala!!!
h — hugs (does he like hugs; how often does he hug you; what are his hugs like?)
his hugs would smell like the manliest cologne and feel so warm. he'd hug you tightly and love for you to bury your face into his neck. he's shy with hugs at first and would be so nervous to have you in his arms, but the longer you're together the more he craves your hugs. though, he's still totally shy.
i — i love you (how fast does he say i love you?)
minho would say the three magic words four months into your relationship. let me set the scene: you're walking, pinkies interlocks and your face is tilted at the sky. the stars look so beautiful at this time, and the more you look the faster you start connecting the constellations. minho had been muttering about something, nothing really important, just the kind of talk that fades into the background of a beautiful night. he chuckles when he notices your expression, bright and dazed, as though looking through the heavens. "are you listening to me?" he asks, amusement dancing in his tone. " 'm sorry, it's just...how could anybody not love the sky? it's so beautiful." you mutter mindlessly. he hadn't realized it until just then, how much he'd miss you if you were gone. those silly, trivial things like a nice cup of tea or smiling at a stranger, how you found the beauty in everything—even the bad stuff. you make his life worth living. it hits him like a ton of bricks, like somebody yanked the rug out from under him and now he's falling straight into your arms. that's when he says it—"i love you." you both stop. for a second, he wonders if he messed up, and then you let out one of your little happy squeals and press the words—"i love you,"—onto his face about as many times as there are stars in the sky. he realized two things that night. one: he was completely and irrevocably in love with you. and two: he wanted to be your husband.
j — jealousy (how jealous does he get; what does he do when he is jealous?)
minho gets jealous when he's using that resting bitch face to the max. that tongue in cheek thing he does? oh yeah, that's coming out full force the moment he sees another man flirting with you. if you're at a bar and some cocky mf struts up to you he's giving him the deadliest death glare, then looking him up and down and scoffing as if a man like him being in the vicinity of you is the most amusing thing he's seen all night. he wouldn't even try to say anything because he trusts you and knows you wouldn't do anything. it's funny, really, how this guy thinks he has a chance. after you're done smushing this guy's ego underneath your heel he'll get all pouty and be holding you the rest of the night—probably due to the alcohol, but we don't talk about that.
k — kisses (what are his kisses like; where does he like to kiss you; where does he like to be kissed?)
he'd give you so many forehead and nose kisses!! you'd get more of those kisses than lip kisses, especially around the boys. you'll just be laying there, existing, and suddenly his lips are puckered against your nose. it's so sweet. he will kiss you and then act like your heart didn't just melt into a puddle on the floor. he likes cheeks kisses, but like most of minho, he won't actually admit that. the second you give him a cheek kiss he's grinning from ear to ear and his entire face is a bashful shade of red.
l — little ones (how is he around children?)
minho would be so sweet with his own children, but with other peoples children he'd be like "get those snot goblins away from me!" minho would never call them snot goblin to their face, but he's definitely giving you that—get these snot goblins away from me!!—face when his auntie forces the baby onto him. with his own kids he'd totally teach them to be little menaces like sending them to pull pranks on the members. he doesn't like other peoples kid, but the second he's looking at his newborn babies face, all of a sudden his entire outlook on children have changed.
m — morning (how are mornings spent around him?)
the first morning spent at his house, you find him shirtless in the kitchen, a black apron reading the words: kiss the chef, the sweet smell of chocolate chips and pancakes clinging to his skin. that's when he realizes you do a little squeal when you're happy. it isn't loud or obnoxious, but it sure does scare the ever-loving shit out of him, spinning around on his heels and holding his spatula like a knife. you throw your hands up. he blinks, looks over at his pancakes (he should flip those soon), then back over to you. "what the hell was that?"you ignore him, sliding over to him with your socks."you made me pancakes!"he chuckles, running his fingers through his hair."yeah, i did."you bite your lip to conceal another giddy squeal, throwing your hands around his waist and pulling him into a deep kiss. he almost drops the pancakes.when you pull away, he's wide-eyed and his ears are bright red. he makes a vow to make you sooo many meals after this.
n — night (how are nights spent with him?)
nights are spent doing his 12 step skin care routine and chilling on his bed with snacks and a good movie, cuddled up beside each other. he'd totally let you do a silly animal shaped face mask and gorge on peanut butter m&ms while watching ginny and georgia (your pick not his). he would claim not to like the show, but he would take it as a personal offense if you tried to watch it without him. most nights are spent like this, quiet, calm and basking in each other's presence until you fall asleep.
o — open (when would he open up; does he say everything at once or does he wait to reveal himself?)
he's a total mystery, that adds to his nonchalant mystic. at first, he wouldn't reveal himself to you, mostly due to fear of ridicule. he would start to truly open up deeper into the relationship. he would make jokes about serious topics that made him feel vulnerable until one day, you grabbed him by the cheeks and reassured him that it was safe to talk to him. that's when he really started to reveal all those secrets.
p — patience (how easily angered is he?)
i don't see him as being a really angry person, he's more of a passive aggressive: eye roll and tongue in cheeks kinda guy. he'd be the kind of person to get pissed at himself more than anything, and only when he's asked you multiple times to do something than he might raise his voice , but that's very, very rare.
q — quizzes (how much would he remember about you; does he remember every little detail or is he forgetful?)
he doesn't cling to every detail like how some of the other members would, but he's also not the type to forget everything. it's more of a—he's literally always busy—and not a—he doesn't care about you—sorta thing. he would forget your favorite color, but remember the exact type of jewelry that you like or your favorite dish.
r — remember (what’s his favorite moment in the relationship?)
the first time he said "i love you." he can never forget that.
s — security (how protective is he; does he protect you; how would he like to be protected?)
minho would like to be emotionally protected. he's not keen on being vulnerable, so knowing that somebody holds the key to his heart can make him nervous. he likes knowing that it's safe in your hands. he protects you not only physically, but emotionally too. he'd be the type of boyfriend to step in front of you at any sign of confrontation, hands in his pockets and chin held high. he would make you feel so safe, placing his hand on the small of your back when you're crossing a road or pulling you into him whenever a creep is staring a little too hard.
t — try (how much effort does he put into dates, anniversaries, everyday tasks etc?)
he doesn't put a ton of effort into things, but that doesn't bother you because it's the thought he puts into it that makes up for it. he's so busy all the time, emotionally and physically drained, but he'll always make time for you. minho won't plan large, extravagant dates, but he'll run you a bath when you're cramping or massage your legs after a long day. he'll order takeout and throw tons of blankets onto the bed and have an in-home date night.
u — ugly (what are some of his bad habits?)
minho has a really bad habit of closing himself off during arguments and also having a quick temper. minho
v — vanity (how concerned is he with his looks?)
i don't think he'd care all that much about his looks at all, especially when he's with you. at first, he would be self-conscious about his facial expressions or the way he's dressed, but how he looks doesn't really faze him.
w — whole (would he feel incomplete without you?)
i don't think he'd feel incomplete if he's just working, but he'd be devastated if you broke up. he might send a quick "i miss you." text, but i don't think he'd be all that clingy.
x — xtra (random headcanons for him)
he's actually really shy!! he would try to prove that he's this cool, calm, collected baddie with amazing dance skills and perfect cheekbones, but around you he's a total spaz. he'd try to show off his dance moves one day and would trip over his own feet. he doesn't wanna mess anything up with you and would overcompensate any small mistake, especially emotionally because he knows he can look mean. he's also probably insecure about his resting face, give it lots of love and remind him you don't think he's mean!!
y — yuck (what are some things he wouldn’t like in general or in a partner?)
he wouldn't like boring people. i feel like he'd be most attracted to somebody who's kind and soft-hearted, yet incredibly passionate about their interests and are not afraid to show it. i feel like he would enjoy deep, intellectual conversations, but he also silly ones so somebody with the personality of a saltine cracker would not be the best suit.
z — zzz (what are his sleeping habits?)
he'd run hot in his sleep and kick you off of him in the middle of the night and then apologize profusely in the morning. he actually wouldn't mind if you were a blanket stealer because he's throwing the blankets off of him anyways. he'd either be a really still sleeper or the kind of person who randomly kicks in his sleep and he's rolling over and squishing you in between the mattress or he's as still as a statue. there is no in between.
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vinylmango · 10 months ago
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On Our Own Terms Nicholas Alexander Chavez x famous!black!reader
Description: Rumors begin to swirl about whatever is going on between Nicholas and (y/n). The pair share mutual friends, but that doesn’t have to mean anything…
Warnings: none that I can think of right now
Sorry if the formatting is weird, I wrote this on my phone 😅
PARTS: ONE two three four five
masterlist
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(y/n)
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tagged: sofcruz
Liked by sofcruz, zendaya, taylorzakharperez, and 1,532,421 others
(y/n) love an impromptu friends trip
sofcruz I’m already organizing the next one 👩🏼‍💻
> (y/n) yes pls hopefully Z and Tom can come next time
> zendaya yes pls 🙏🏽
user1 so are we just not acknowledging the soft launch…or…
user2 “friends trip”…yeah…ok 👀 we see that last slide girl
zendaya so happy for you 🥺
> (y/n) 🥺💗
user3 God I see what you have done for others…WHEN WILL IT BE MY TURN
> user4 real 🫠
user5 idk who I’m more jealous of (y/n) because he looks hot or him because it’s (y/n) and she is everything 😭
> user6 welcome to bi panic
(y/n)loml Face card is deadly. Digging my grave as i type this
(y/n)loml just fallen to my knees in the middle of walmart
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nicholasalexanderchavez
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tagged: cooperkoch, nicholasgalitzine, taylorzahkarperez
Liked by nicholasgalitzine, nicchavezismine, and 500,000 others
nicholasalexanderchavez much needed filming break
nicholasgalitzine still not over that football defeat are you?
> nicholasalexanderchavez it was a tie and you know it
taylorzakharperez unfortunately back to the grind 😔
nicchavezismine the first slide is my new lockscreen 😍😍😍
user1 are we going to ignore the legs that are obviously not his in the last pic?
user2 she’s so lucky but I know she’s probably hot so he’s lucky too 😭
user3 that should be me holding your hand 😭 THAT SHOULD BE ME MA-
lexiloo6 hi (louder than everyone else)
> user4 GET IN LINE
lexiloo6 BODY-ODY-ODY 🤤
lexiloo6 just say the word i am yours any time any place
lexiloo6 i am so down bad for this man it’s not even funny
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(y/n)
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Liked by sofcruz, jazzsinclair, nicholasalexanderchavez, and 1,602,120 others
(y/n) I love nature…almost as much as I love you
sofcruz ugh this is so cute. I could never wake up that early
> (y/n) it was worth it
> sofcruz literally meant for each other
nicholasalexanderchavez nature girl 🌺🌿
> liked by (y/n)
jazzsinclair love this
user1 his back is hot…is that weird to say?
> user2 no girl. We get it
itswes aren’t you directionally challenged?
> (y/n) you get lost twice and your brother will never let it go 🙄
> itswes praying for him to make it back. he’s way cooler than you are
> (y/n) love you too 😃
nicchavezismine simply here bc he liked. Although I don’t really see much to like…
> goddess(y/n) prime example of joblessness kids
(y/n)loml how are you real?! I’m so in love with you
(Y/n)loml just one chance (y/n) I just need one chance
(Y/n)loml marry me. If you could just sign the license I’ve already done the rest
> user3 real
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nicholasalexanderchavez
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Liked by (y/n), timotheechalamet, and 800,000 others
nicholasalexanderchavez another item off the bucket list ⛰️ and I’m so happy I got to do it with you
nicholasgalitzine Sick photo dude. How long did the hike take?
> nicholasalexanderchavez like almost 3 hours but it was worth it for the pic
nicchavezismine he’s so fit 😍 I’d hike with you any day 💗
> user1 um…anyways…
(y/n) nature boy 🌿✨
> liked by nicholasalexanderchavez
sofcruz jeez you’re high up 😬
> nicholasalexanderchavez lol you know there’s a path right?
> sofcruz I am NOT outdoorsy
>> (y/n) but I love you anyways 💗 we balance each other out
>> sofcruz we do 🥺💗 love you. The yin to my yang
>>user2 lol not the sof and (y/n) love fest in his comments 😂 thats so random. Love them
lexiloo6 God you are hot
lexiloo6 so thankful I get to breathe the same air as you
lexiloo6 I’m flexible!
> user3 LMAOOO real
lexiloo6 the shirt is white next question
> user4 you are so delulu but so real girl
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sturnsmadl · 11 months ago
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enemy!chris headcannons!
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warnings!-mostly just angst and chris being a huge dick, swearing, mentions of self harm, slight bodyshaming, bullying, mentions of nudes, kissing, male masturbation, mentions of sex, light fluff, player chris.
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enemy!chris who hates all your boyfriends and ex's.
"wheres the ugly guy your always with lately?"
"we broke up.."
"thank god. he bored the shit out of me."
enemy!chris who makes you feel like shit for fun.
"im gonna go get lunch if you wanna-"
"of course you are. always eating."
enemy!chris who still denys he likes you.
"your in love with her. we all see it."
"no im not.."
"the denial is crazy."
enemy!chris who doesn't let you go on dates.
enemy!chris who constantly makes sneaky comments.
enemy!chris who is always looking at your body.
enemy!chris who never lets you get your own way.
"can we go target instead?"
"oh yeah! i love-"
"actually walmarts good."
"can you just fucking decide?!"
enemy!chris who makes excuses like crazy.
"i was drunk." "i dont know. i was tired." "phone got hacked."
enemy!chris who you regret hooking up with.
"wasnt saying all this when you were under me."
"shutup. i regret that everyday."
"oh.."
enemy!chris who goes through your phone while your asleep.
enemy!chris who is always harsh with you.
"im gonna go to the gym when i-"
"thats a shocker."
enemy!chris who blocks all the boys off your phone.
enemy!chris who always asks for you to send.
"hi."
"what?"
"you tryna send something?"
enemy!chris who doesn't let you get a word in.
"oh nick did i tell you about-"
"god no one fucking cares..shut the fuck up for once."
enemy!chris who hooks up with girls all the time so you know your just a number.
"u said i was.."
"different? yeah. i say that a lot huh?"
enemy!chris who breaks your lock when he finds out you hurt yourself.
"fuck..where are you?!"
"bathroom.."
enemy!chris who keeps an eye on you at parties.
enemy!chris who shows you up when your in a group.
"i got this new shirt and its like-"
"suprised you could afford it."
"chris.."
enemy!chris who feels slightly bad when he finds you crying because of his words.
"are you...okay..?"
"do i look okay?!"
"uhh..no..?"
enemy!chris who stares at you when you scream at him.
"AND YOU CANT KEEP IT IN YOUR PANTS CAN YOU?!"
"well..i-"
"EVERYTIME I TRY SPEAK YOU HAVE TO INSULT ME!!"
enemy!chris who kisses you to shut you up.
"chris your really starting to-"
kisses you
enemy!chris who hugs you to his chest when you cry.
"shh..your okay.."
"its not i-"
"your getting makeup on my white shirt."
"oh fuck off chris."
enemy!chris who gets caught jerking off to your pictures.
"fuck!..nghm..y/n.."
"chris have you seen-"
"what?! get out!!"
enemy!chris who finally admits everything.
"sorry..i was just too scared to admit my own feelings.."
"oh..i mean..nick said-"
"doesnt matter. im sorry."
enemy!chris who actually feels guilty.
"but..you said all that stuff so quick like you didnt even think.."
"i know..i didnt mean it. i was just a dick."
enemy!chris who loves make-up sex.
"yeah? fuck your tight..you feel that?"
"yeah! fuck chris.."
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a/n this is a lot but its kinda my favourite one lol. i like angst so thats probably why :) needed to put some warnings which i probably should from now on for all tbh. im very aware that chris would never act like this!!! mafia matt might be out tommorow depends how im feeling tbh.
taglist! @bellaonthelow @hrtsdollie @moonk1ss3d @sturnclouds @christophersgf @ellizzyy @fratbrochrisgf @phoenix062 @pixxiies @conspiracy-ash @blahbel668 @monroesturnns @gwennybenny @sturnobsessedwh0re @xoxo4chriss @pixie-sticks-are-good @wurlibydominicfike @anitahunt @ilusa @mattstrombolii @stvrlighht @asherrisrandom @amelia-sturniolo3
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whatonearthbro · 5 months ago
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crimson eyes | season1rivals!bucky x reader
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warnings: teeth-rotting fluff, no smut, bucky calls reader doll once, no use of y/n, soft kissing, mentions of blood and wound, you stich bucky’s wound up
new york was as much as a hellhole figuratively as it actually was. vampires roamed the streets, and if it wasn’t vampires wrecking everything it was looters trying to get what they could to survive. you and barnes were housed together in a small, cramped apartment, as you have been for the past month and a half. there were two bedrooms, both painfully small. you got the ever so slightly larger one.
one night, bucky came home from a grocery run with a bloodied shirt. “what the hell happened? oh my god, are you ok?” you shot up from the couch and examined his arm, which was the source of the bleeding. “i’m fine. i ran into a little…problem.” he winced in pain as he put the bag down. he was bleeding out everywhere, and he still managed to bring your shared groceries home. interesting.
he sat down on a stool as you got a medkit to stich him up. he took his shirt off, and the wound wasn’t as bad as you thought. it was superficial, and it was pretty clean, thank goodness. but that wasn’t the main thing you were looking at. you were slyly looking at his chest every now and then as you stitched him up, his strong abs speckled with white hair, that gathered at his happy trail, which went lower and lower and..
“ow, fuck-“ bucky yelped as you poked the wound a little too hard as you were too busy checking him out. “shit, i’m sorry! lemme get you some tylenol real quick.” you stood up and made your way to the kitchen cabinet that hosted a couple of different medicines, and you found the pain killers. you looked back at the soldier. “do you want something to drink with this?” he looked back at you, and a bit of silence hung in the air. “water’s fine.” he said flatly.
you continued to stich him up for a couple of minutes, and the wound was completely sealed up for the most part. he had stopped bleeding mostly as well. “thank you for takin’ care of me.” he said quietly as you sat in front of him, wiping the dried blood softly with a gauze pad. “it’s my job. we’re here to take care of eachother, right?” you murmured quietly as he nodded.
“i found some things at the back of a walmart that wasn’t picked through for you. some candy and stuff.” he gestured at the bag that was filled with stuff, even a small plushie toy. you smiled excitedly and chuckled. “i..thank you. i didn’t even know candy still existed here, y’know..”
the two of you gazed at each other for a while. you felt you could get lost in those crimson eyes of his as they seemed to pierce your soul. the smile on his face faded. he placed his organic hand on your knee, and it rested there as he leaned in. a soft blush ran over his face. you could feel his warm breath on your face, and he looked at you with his one-quarter lidded eyes, “is this ok?” he whispered quietly. a hot blush ran over your face too, and your cheeks flushed. “yeah.” you remarked in a hushed tone. with slight hesitation, he learned in even more and gave you a feather-light kiss. your lips met softly as you closed your eyes, and his hands moved to your hips.
he pulled back and looked at you again, a darker shade of pink now on his face. you put a white lock of his hair behind his ear as you said, “what was that for?” you muttered. “it was.. it was a thank you.” he kissed you again, this time with more pressure, and his metallic hand cradled your face as gently as it possibly could. you kissed him back, and tangled one of your hands in his snow colored hair. he sighed in the kiss, and kissed you even deeper. his hand kneaded your plush waist as his artificial one rested on your collarbone. he broke the kiss, and he gazed at you as he licked his lips.
“you’re a good kisser.” he said as he got up. you watched him, wondering where he was going. he walked over to the walmart bag, and pulled out a king sized snickers. “wish i could of known sooner, though.” he smiled coyly and gave you the candy. “this is my favorite..” you smiled and stood up. you wrapped your arms around him, even though he somewhat towered over you. “thank you.”
he kissed your forehead softly and rested his hands around your waist. “you’re welcome, doll.”
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atlafan · 25 days ago
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One Of Your Girls - Prologue
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a/n: hello! this is a Patreon exclusive series that I just posted the last part of the other day, so I'm posting the prologue on here. There are six parts total (technically 7 if you count the prologue). I dipped my toes into the world of hockey romance, hope you enjoy and consider joining my patreon community. We have a lot of fun over there!
warnings: smut
words: 7.3K
Tumblr Masterlist I Patreon
summary: Harry is a starting player for the Boston Bruins. When the team is introduced to their new social media manager, he's hit with an unexpected, but welcome, blast from the past.
 Four Years Ago…
The Hockey House parties at school were the ones to be invited to. The boys always went all out with their themes. You’d think a party thrown by a bunch of jocks would be unruly and not somewhere girls want to be, but most men’s hockey players are a little older than average college students. A lot of them play hockey for a couple of years before starting university. If you make it onto a farm team right after high school, then you want to show yourself off while you’re still in your prime. If you’re not drafted, then you can go play college hockey and try your luck there. That’s not to say all of the guys are older, but when the captain is twenty-five, well, he’s gonna make sure things don’t get out of hand.
Avery’s friend who’s dating one of the hockey boys invited her to the party tonight. It’s an “ABP” party – Anything But People. So, most people are dressed like animals or aliens or objects. They used to do “ABC” parties – Anything But Clothes – but the current captain outlawed that last year. He felt bad that most people were practically naked in the middle of winter. Avery decided to dress up like a sexy rabbit. She already had a navy blue strapless teddy and sheer black stockings to wear under it. She borrowed a pair of black heels from her friend, went to WalMart for the rabbit ears and cotton tail, and put her artistic skills to use to add some black contours to her nose to make it look like a rabbit’s. She drew on some whiskers, then did some old school 1960’s eye makeup, using some old Playboy Bunnies for inspiration. To put it simply, she’s never looked or felt sexier.
She’s chatting with some friends, keeping her solo cup by her mouth when she catches the eyes of a very handsome guy from across the room. By the third time they lock eyes, he smirks at her, and she smiles behind the rim of her cup. He weaves through the people around him until he can get to her.
“Hey.” He says when he reaches her.
“Hi.” She looks him up and down. “What are you supposed to be?”
“The big bad wolf.” He grins. “Wanna dance?” He nods towards the other room where people are grinding on each other to the beat of whatever song is playing.
“Yeah.” She smiles, finishes her drink, then sets the cup on the floor before following him to the other room.
They dance to bop after bop after bop, dropping it low to Get Buck in Here, grinding to Grillz, and gyrating to The Way I Are.
Eventually, Avery finds her back up against a wall with the guy’s hand by the side of her face, slightly caging her in.
“You know,” he says, his lips by the shell of her ear, “in the wild, wolves eat little bunny rabbits.”
“Is that so?”
“It is.” He nods, his nose brushing her cheek. “In fact, I’ve been dying to eat you all night.” A shiver runs up Avery’s spine. He’s being cheeky about wanting to go down on her. Smooth. Very smooth. He curls a finger under her chin so their eyes can meet. “What do you say, little bunny girl? Want me to eat you?”
“Do you genuinely want to, or is that just a line to get me into bed?”
“You’ve been fucking the wrong guys if they’re promising to go down on you, and then don’t deliver. Personally, I’ve never understood it.”
“Do you have a room here?”
“Oh, um…” He steps back and blinks. “Wouldn’t you rather go to your place? Then you’ll be in the comfort of your own room, you won’t need to use a bathroom that a bunch of jocks use and don’t clean. Plus, then I’ll know you’re home safe.”
“Well, that’s sweet. Yeah, we can go back to my place.”
“Did you bring a jacket?”
“No.” She giggles.
“Here.” He takes off his own and drapes it over her shoulders, then wraps an arm around her. “Let’s go.”
Avery’s apartment wasn’t too far from the Hockey House. It’s nothing special, just a studio, but it’s much better than having roommates and having to share a bathroom with a ton of other girls.
The second she’s keyed inside, her company for the night urges her in, kicks the door closed behind them, and pins her up against the nearest wall. Her chest heaves as she looks up at him. His are on either side of her head, but he’s not leaning in to kiss her, not yet.
“If you change your mind at any time, just let me know, and we’ll stop, okay?”
“Okay.” She swallows.
“M’gonna kiss you now.” He tells her just as their lips brush. A gentle suck on her bottom lips is what makes her reach up to wrap her arms around his neck. His arms go around her waist, and he uses the leverage to pick her up and carry her over to her bed. He lays her down and crawls on top of her, never breaking their kiss. Avery sucks on his tongue, eliciting a moan from him. He pulls back and presses the pad of his thumb against her bottom lip. “Such a pretty mouth.”
“You…you can use it however you want.” She says with a shaky, yet confident breath.
“Aww, does the little bunny girl want daddy to use her as a fuck toy?”
Daddy? Seriously? How old is this guy? If he weren’t so sexy, Avery would have the ick. Before she can respond, he drops down to speak into her ear, “If that’s weird, you don’t have to call me that, it’s just something I like.”
“It’s fine.” She says, taking the opportunity to experiment a little. Any and all sex Avery has ever had has been sort of vanilla. Sure, she’s able to get wet and orgasm, but no man has ever expressed wanting her so carnally before. The way this man grips her flesh and kisses her makes her feel desired, and it’s giving her a major confidence boost. And maybe it’s because they’re both in costume, so she decides to roll with this. “But…if I’m your bunny, then I think I’d rather call you something else…”
“Like what?” He sits up, sort of straddling her, and raises an eyebrow.
“I don’t know…you’re the big bad wolf, right? What if I just called you Mr. Wolf?”
“Mr. Wolf?” He smirks. “Have a little bestiality kink, hm?”
“No.” She shakes her head, laughing a little. “I just don’t think I could call you daddy…”
“Alright, we can try Mr. Wolf, or you can call me Sir.”
She wants to ask what his actual fucking name is, but he doesn’t seem to want to give that information up, so she refrains. So, she nods and starts unbuttoning his shirt the rest of the way. It was already partially unbuttoned to show off the tattoos around his collarbones. She brushes it off his shoulders and watches it fall to the bed. Her hands roam his sculpted torso.
“Jesus.” She says under her breath.
“What?” He chuckles.
“Nothing…you’re just…you’re certainly built like a hockey player, that’s all.”
He grins and leans down to kiss her, sucking her tongue this time. Her eyes roll back, and she spreads her thighs wider for him to lay more comfortably. One of his hands skates up her chest and finds its home at the base of her throat. He gently squeezes the sides, and Avery’s hips buck upwards. She’s never been choked before, but this feels nice.
They take their times kissing and grinding. This is some of Avery’s favorite kind of foreplay. There’s just something so hot about desperately rubbing up against someone while they devour your mouth. A squeak leaves her when he finally brings a hand down to cup her pussy.
“Fuck, you’re so wet, can feel it through your clothes.” He looks down between them. “How does this come off?”
“There’s, uh, a snap at the crotch.” She licks her suddenly dry lips and watches him pop the snap. He rucks up the material just enough to pull down her tights. She wasn’t wearing anything under them, there was no need.
“Oh, bunny, this is such a pretty pussy.” He sits up on his knees and pushes her thighs back so her knees are by her ears. “Need to taste you.” He says before licking the flat of his tongue up her slit. He does this a few times before sucking her clit into his mouth. She gasps and grasps at the blankets. It’s not the most comfortable way to be eaten out, but the noises Mr. Wolf are making are the perfect distraction. “You’re fucking soaked, all because of me, hm?”
“Yes.” She pants when his tongue starts swirling around the button. “Can…can I…” she bites into her bottom lip when his eyes meet hers.
“What do you need, bunny?”
“Your f-fingers, please. I want your fingers inside while you do that.”
He nods and runs his fingers through her slick before working two inside of her. Avery’s back arches, and her legs drop to drape over Mr. Wolf’s shoulders. He spreads them wide as he works his fingers in and out of her, simultaneously sucking her clit. She moans and whines and whimpers until she can’t take it anymore.
“I’m gonna come!” She warns him.
“Not yet.” He pops off of her and sits back.
“What?!” She sits up and looks at him, stunned.
“When you come, it’s gonna be on my cock, understand? I’m just warming you up.” He reaches to tug her garment up off her, and she raises her arms. Her breasts spill out, and he all but launches onto her, taking her nipple, and a good amount of her breast into his mouth. He moans, and kneads the other breast with his hand. Her fingers rake through his hair, and she pushes him closer. “You’re fucking perfect.” He growls, taking her other nipple between his teeth.
“Oh, God.” She moans.
“Get on your belly.” He tells her, and she listens. She feels him spread her legs, and then her cheeks, and then his tongue is on her other hole.
“Oh!” She looks back at him with surprise.
“This okay?”
“Y-yeah, no one’s ever, um, done that to me before, is all.”
“No one’s ever eaten your little peach? You haven’t been fucking the right guys, bunny.”
Avery lets her face melt into her pillows as Mr. Wolf licks inside her ass. Her mouth falls open and she pushes back into him, loving how it all feels. She tightens up when she feels his finger gently prod inside, but she doesn’t stop him. She just takes a deep breath and lets him finger her ass.
“That’s a good fucking girl.” He praises, and a shiver runs up her spine. “Opening up all your holes for me.”
“Please.” She whimpers. She’s not even sure what she’s begging for.
“Want my cock?”
“Yes.” She turns over when she feels him move back. She watches him fish a condom out of his back pocket before getting off the bed. “Oh, wait, I can’t use those ones.” She says when she notices it’s a Trojan.
“I never go bare-“
“No, that’s not what I’m saying. I’m allergic to latex.” She gets up and rummages through her bedside table drawer and grabs a Skyn condom to hand to him. “Here.”
“Thanks.” He undoes his pants and drops them, and his briefs, to the floor before stepping out of them. He rips the foil packet open with his teeth and rolls it onto his throbbing length. Avery’s a little surprised he didn’t want her to suck him off first, but it’s no skin off her nose. “What happens if you use the ones with latex?” He asks curiously.
“It just burns really bad for like three days afterwards, not a great feeling.”
“Poor thing.” He pouts at her before getting on the bed, laying back. “Come ride it.”
“You…you want me to-“
“Can’t be a pillow princess with me, sorry.” He smirks. “You wanna come, you have to work for it.”
“I’m not a pillow princess.” She huffs as she mounts him. “It’s just polite to go in missionary first when you have a giant dick.” She grips him and paints him along her slit before taking the head in.
“You can take it.”
Avery’s never been one to turn down a challenge, so she slowly and steadily takes him inch by glorious inch, loving the way he’s stretching her at the same time. Once she’s fully seated, she takes a few deep breaths to adjust. He folds his arms behind his head and smirks up at her.
“Good girl, now fuck yourself and make yourself come on me.”
“Okay.” She experimentally rolls her hips forward, then back. She’s not going to give him the satisfaction of bouncing on him. If he wants her to come, then she’s going to grind forward and back how she likes. “Can you keep talking to me?”
“Yeah.” He moves to prop himself up with his hands behind him. He watches her get a pace going. “There you go, bunny, use my cock. And when you’re done, I’m gonna break your back like a fucking glowstick.”
“Oh, God.” Her mouth falls open.
“You’d like that? I knew you would. You’ve had cockslut written all over your face the entire night.”
“Fuck.” Her head rolls back and her back arches. She holds a hand up near his mouth. “Can you wet my fingers, please?” He does so happily, sucking on the tips of her fingers. She brings them down to her clit and starts rubbing. Her hip movements all but stop so she can focus on rubbing herself. She feels her eyes water as she starts to feel that familiar feeling lick up her spine.
“That’s it, fuck, touch yourself.” He watches in amazement. A private show, just for him. “Let it go, baby, I can feel it.” She’s clamping down impossibly tight around him. A whimper leaves her. She’s so close. “Come on, bunny, let it go. Come for me, let yourself go.”
“Fffuck, daddy!” She has no time to be shocked about what just came out of her mouth because she’s spasming around his cock. “Daddy, daddy, daddy!”
He watches her continue to rub herself. “That’s it, keep going, rub it out until you’re done, baby. Get those aftershocks.”
Avery comes for what feels like a solid minute, maybe more, before collapsing into Mr. Wolf’s chest. Her skin is laced with sweat, but he doesn’t seem to mind from the way he’s hugging her close and kissing her hairline. After a beat, he turns them over so she’s on her back, and he throws her legs over his shoulders. He grips her thighs and fucks into her shallowly. Avery’s mouth falls open, and she looks up at him, almost confused. His grin is so sinister.
“Found your spot already, huh?” He keeps with the same pace, nudging her g-spot each time. “Rub that little clit for me, bunny. I wanna feel you come again while I come. Your pussy is so fucking tight, baby, I won’t last much longer.”
Avery’s quick to rub her clit, desperately wanting to know what it’s like to come from external and internal stimulation at the same time. The sound that leaves her is less than attractive. It’s a scream mixed with a grunt mixed with something else that’s guttural. But the man above her seems to love it because he spills into the condom not even two seconds later.
He pulls out of her and pulls the condom off before spooning her. He shoves one of the blankets between them just so his leaking cock isn’t between her cheeks. What a gentleman.
She wasn’t expecting a cuddle, so she adjusts against him and sinks into his touch. He peppers kisses to her shoulder and neck.
Ten minutes later, his fingers start playing with her pussy again, so she asks if he wants to fuck her again. A new condom was rolled onto his cock, and they went for a much longer second round. Avery came four more times. It was magical. This time, he didn’t cuddle when they finished. He pulled his clothes on right away, and Avery threw on an oversized t-shirt, suddenly not liking how vulnerable she feels.
“Not to be one of those girls, but it’s really late,” it’s three in the morning, “you could just stay if you want.”
“I won’t sleep.” He says as he buttons up his shirt and scoops his jacket up off the floor. “Your bed’s kind of small.” He comes to her, gently gripping her chin and pecking her lips. “Makes sense, small girl only needs a small bed.”
“It’s a full-sized mattress.” She frowns. “What do you have?”
“A queen.”
“A queen would’ve been too big in here.”
“I agree.” He kisses her again. “We’ll do it at my place next time.”
“Next time?” She says, trying not to sound too hopeful.
“Yeah.” He takes his phone out of his pocket and taps a few times before handing it to her. Avery sees he put her contact name in as ‘bunny 🐰’ and it makes her smile. She puts her number in and texts herself, putting his contact in as ‘wolf man’. Again, she wants to ask him his name, but if he’s looking for something casual, names aren’t really necessary, right? “Cool.” He shoves it into his pocket. “I’ll text you.” One more searing kiss, and he’s out the door.
“Holy fuck.” Avery flops onto her back on the bed.
What a night…
**
Two Years Ago…
“Harry, we can’t thank you enough again for coming out tonight.” Harry’s old coach from Boston College tells him.
“I wouldn’t have missed it. I’m just happy that I can help give back. I never would’ve made it through four years here if it weren’t for the scholarships I received.”
Harry agreed to attend a charity golf tournament that Boston College puts on every September. The tournament teams raise a fuck ton of money, plus Harry loves golf. It’s a day to spend with his old friends, and he can finally give back a decent chunk of change. He’s a rookie center for the Bruins. His first season was out of this world, and he already can’t wait for the preseason to start.
The golf itself happens early in the morning. There are a ton of people coming around to take pictures and videos of the players. Harry knew he’d be getting a lot of attention today. He’s practically a celebrity compared to everyone else here. But he doesn’t mind. It gives the event some press. He hopes some other alums will be inspired to participate.
He and his friends are taking a break, sipping on some beer, when he notices a woman in a maroon sundress over by one of the drink carts. She has a press pass badge hanging from a lanyard around her neck. A black blazer rests in the crook of her elbow as she uses her other hand to fan herself. Her hair is down. Harry has a spare elastic.
“I’ll be right back.” He says to his friends before making his way over to the woman. The younger person manning the drink cart freezes at the sight of him. “Hi, could I get another?” He hands over the empty bottle of beer, then looks at the woman. “I couldn’t help but notice…could you use one of these?” He holds up the elastic.
“I…” she looks at the elastic, then at Harry. “No, I have a scrunchie in my bag, but thanks.”
“Oh.” He rubs the back of his neck. “You just looked hot, and your hair’s down, so I thought…I’ll just go be embarrassed somewhere else now.” He takes the new bottle of beer from the drink cart person.
“Wait, um, I hope I didn’t come off as rude, I was just a little stunned for a second. You’re the last person I thought I’d bump into here.”
“I know, I asked them not to publicize that I’d be here. I’m fine with everything afterwards, but I didn’t want the club to get overrun with fans.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Do you not follow hockey? I know we’re playing golf, but this is for hockey alumni-“
“I follow hockey. I work for the Boston College athletics department doing social media. I was told a player from the Bruins would be here, but I wasn’t given a name. What are you, third string?”
“No…I’m a starter, the center. I’m Harry Styles.”
“Ohhhhh, that’s your name. And here I was thinking your last name was Wolf.”
“Wolf?” Harry furrows his brows.
“Yeah, and your first name was Big, middle name Bad.” She smirks, then brushes by him to get into her golfcart. Harry watches her, and moves quickly to follow behind. He makes it to her cart before she’s able to drive away. He grips the top of the cart and bends down to look at her. “Well, isn’t this familiar.”
“Have we met before?”
“Unfortunately.” She nods, looking at his arm and the way he’s slightly caging her in.
“When?”
“Let me answer your question with a question of my own: do you still have the same cellphone number you had, say, two years ago?”
“Um, yeah.”
“Great! Give me one second, then.” She takes out her phone and fires off a text. Harry feels his phone buzz in his pocket. “You should check that, could be important.”
Harry pulls his phone out, and all of the color drains from his face when he sees, ‘bunny 🐰,’ on the screen. He looks at her and isn’t sure what to say.
“You never told me your name, but as it turns out, the next day, I saw your face all over ESPN. And when I texted you about, you never answered. The kids call that ghosting.”
“I…”
“I was really mad when it happened because I thought we really connected, and you, you know, told me next time. But then I realized you only said that to soften the blow of you not spending the night.”
“I’m really sorry. I don’t have an excuse for being a colossal asshole.” He moves around the cart, and slides into the passenger seat. He holds out his right hand, “Hi, I’m Harry Styles, and you are?”
“Avery Malden.” She shakes his hand. “Nice to officially meet you.”
“Likewise.” He grins. “So, we both went to the same school. When did you graduate?”
“I was a senior when we hooked up, so two years ago. I started off in marketing as an intern, but I really love athletics, specifically hockey, so I asked to be moved to the athletics marketing team, and now I’m an assistant director. They treat me really well.”
“I can see that. Sending you to cover the event must be huge.”
“There’s a lot of us here today.”
“Are you here all day?”
“Yup, you?”
“Yup.” He grins. “I have to give a speech at lunch, but after that…”
“After that, what?” She laughs. “Do you seriously think I would sleep with you again just for you to ghost me?”
“I wouldn’t ghost this time. See, I’m much older and wiser than I used to be, Avery. I would tell you upfront that I’m not looking for anything serious, but I would very much like to fuck you again, then amicably part ways.”
“Doesn’t it ever get tiring to sleep with a ton of people once, rather than sleep with the same person who knows your body?”
“I don’t hookup a lot anymore, actually. I have a lot going on in my personal life, people depending on me. I put them first. Between that and my crazy schedule, it’s just easier to have one-time things here and there.”
“I can respect that.” Avery nods thoughtfully. “Are you genuinely single? Because I won’t be the other woman.”
“I am genuinely single.” He chuckles.
“Come find me later. As for right now, I think your boys are waiting.” She nods towards the group of men looking over at them.
“I’ll find you after my speech, bunny.”
Two hours later, Harry’s got Avery pressed up against the wall of a closet that happened to be unlocked. His hands are up under the skirt of her dress, squeezing roughly at her ass. He moans into her mouth as he kisses her. Her fingers tangle in his hair, and she sucks on his tongue. He tastes like beer, and it’s really doing it for her right now.
“Get these fucking things off.” He growls as he yanks her panties down. She steps out of them, and watches as he shoves them into his back pocket. His fingers slide through her slick folds, and his hips rut forward.
“You’re so hard.” She moans.
“You’re so wet.” His middle finger sinks up inside her. His free hand gently covers her mouth. They need to be quiet. “Okay?” She nods yes at that, then nips at his fingers when a second one joins the first inside her pussy. “Here.” He shoves his fingers into her mouth for her to suck on as he works her pussy and clit, his thumb rubbing circles into it. “Do you have any of your special condoms?”
Avery laughs around his fingers and pushes him back. “Yes, I have some in my purse.” She digs through the bag and finds a foil packet, handing it to Harry. “How should we do this, do you want me to turn around and bend over, or do you want to just lift me up?”
“What would feel better for you?” He asks as he frees his hard, throbbing cock, rolling the rubber onto it.
“If you railed me from behind.”
“Then turn around and plant your hands against the wall.” He moves behind her and flips the skirt of her dress up. He smacks her ass before slapping his cock against her pussy. He’s slow as he pushes the head of his cock in. Avery tuns her mouth to her shoulder to moan into. Harry keeps one hand at the base of her spine, and the other on the back of her neck as he starts to get a pace going. “You feel fucking incredible.” The wet sound between them starts getting louder. He looks down and notices her thighs shaking and a small puddle forming between her feet. “Fuck, did you just squirt?”
“Yes, I…I had a lot to drink, and I didn’t want to pee before we did this, it’s not pee, but you’re pushing right into my spot and…I’m gonna come, oh my fucking God, I’m gonna fucking come.” She whimpers.
“Fuck, bunny, let it out, let it all out. Make a mess for me.”
Avery’s starts fucking herself back against Harry, letting her ass bounce faster against him. He smacks her ass over and over again, then decides to reach a hand around to her front, slapping her clit repeatedly. Avery moves to stand a little straighter so she can lean back against Harry’s strong form. She looks up at him and they kiss as she reaches her high. He swallows every moan and whine, reveling in the mess she’s making. He works her through the aftershocks before letting himself come.
“Fuck.” His chest heaves against her back. He slowly pulls out and adjusts her dress for her.
“Can I have my underwear back?”
“No.” He smirks as he tucks his cock away. “Memento.”  
“That’s not fair. I’m not leaving here with a memento from you.”
“That’s true.” He reaches into his other back pocket for his wallet and looks through it. “Here.” He hands her a Trojan condom. “You’ll never use it, and you’ll remember I gave it to you.”
“You’re an idiot.” She chuckles, tossing it into her purse. “What are you gonna do, wrap my panties around your cock while you fuck yourself to the thought of me? Get your come all over it?”
“Uhhh, yeah, that’s exactly what I’m gonna do now. Thanks for the idea.” He smirks, then leans in to kiss her. “This is progress, we know each other’s names.”
“Speaking of which, do I need to sign some sort of NDA?”
“That depends, are you gonna go sell your story to a tabloid?”
“No.”
“Then we’re good.” He kisses her again. “And apparently, I still have your number.”
“Which means nothing because you said this was a one off.” She flips her hair over her shoulder. “The next time I’ll see you will be at TD Garden, or on my television.”
**
One Month Ago…
Avery just accepted the job of a lifetime. She’s come a long way since her senior year of college. A big middle finger to everyone who told her a degree in Public Relations with a specialization in social media wouldn’t take her anywhere. While she believes in making your own luck, she wouldn’t be where she is now without the degree she received.
No one knows how to save a brand like her. She’s helped to turn around various college hockey team social media channels, specifically on Tik Tok, and now she’s moving on up to the professional world of hockey. Avery Malden is now a proud employee of the Boston Bruins. She’ll be managing all social media channels, going on the road with the team for exclusive footage that she can use for trends on Tik Tok, and creating calendars for charity events for the players to volunteer at. The Bruins aren’t always painted in the best light. Being a Boston team and all, most people outside of New England can’t stand them, and they’re seen as rougher around the edges than other teams. The boys are never afraid of a fight on the ice. Blood and teeth are constantly being spat out of mouths. And the starting goalie? He’s an absolute beast. He’s a scary mother fucker on the ice, but a total cinnamon roll off the ice, or so some of the other administrators have told her.
It's a dream come true to be able to work for the organization that represents her home city. She’s been dying to come back to Boston for ages. She’ll be closer to friends and family again, which is a major bonus. She’ll be making just under six figures, which she was totally shocked about. Most administrators that work in these types of jobs get paid very little compared to the managers and trainers and coaches, but the owner of the Bruins, and the owner of the NHL, want more teams to become more family friendly. They want to inspire future players and make it a safer space. So, that’s where Avery comes in.
What really wowed the search committee? Avery showed them data on the number of romance novels that are out there with plots based on hockey players. There’s a major boom happening that the Bruins should capitalize on. Leaning into a female audience could bring their sales way up. A lot of the guys, especially the starting players, are hot. Not all hockey players are, but this team looks like they were carved and chiseled from marble. If they play into the female gaze in the way women actually like, then ticket sales are bound to go up with a wider demographic. Women don’t want sexy calendars or overly ripped dudes whose muscles make them look scary. Women want to see these guys do their sexual little stretches out on the ice so they have spank bank material. They want to see these guys sweaty with their helmets off after a game. At least, that’s what the data shows.
She’s been on the job for about two weeks, still getting settled into her office. She has a whiteboard up on one of the walls with the six starting players: Niall Horan (goalie), Anders Eriksson (right defenseman), Edvin Koskinen (left defenseman), Ivan Sokolov (right wing), Gabriel Tremblay (left wing), and Harry Styles (center).
Eriksson is the captain, and is the oldest on the team, coming in at thirty-five, which is sometimes unheard of. He and Koskinen share two halves to one braincell. They’re constantly in sink. Never has there been a better dream team than theirs. They protect Horan the most, and make sure the puck makes its way to either Sokolov, Tremblay, or Styles. Sokolov and Tremblay are great supports for Styles, but also make their own amazing plays, and are never afraid to get the puck away from their opponents. Styles is the central attacker, the one who scores most out of the other players. He works closely with the wingers, either giving them the assist for them to score, or vice versa. He has to be on target, make sure passes are completed, and win faceoffs. Styles is always getting into fights on the ice and has the most penalty box minutes out of everyone else, but even with his faults, he’s a team player. He knows it’s not all about him. One person does not a winning team make.  
Avery’s been studying all of their stats and has gotten herself familiar with most the of the alternates. She’s been grabbing coffee with a couple of the other ladies that work for the organization. Nadene is the GM’s executive assistant, and Claudia works in payroll. The three are all around the same age, and having work friends is always a bonus.
Claudia has a secret situationship with Ivan that you wouldn’t know was a secret given the word vomit that spews from her about him. She’s clearly in love with the guy, but she doesn’t want to talk to him about how she’s feeling because the sex is so good, she doesn’t want to scare him off.
Nadene has a crush on Niall, but the puck bunnies that try their luck after each home game are too much of a deterrent for her to go for it. A lot of them will go to the same bar after home games to hang out, and Nadene and Niall always end up sitting next to each other, but she’s never worked up the nerve to ask him to take her home, and he sure as shit hasn’t made a move either. Nadene fears she’s in the friend zone. Sometimes she wonders if she’s secretly off limits since she’s the GM’s, Oliver, niece. Claudia and Avery agree that that’s got to be the issue.
“As for the love lives of our other starters,” Claudia says, “Anders is married and has two sons. His wife is a doll. She and the boys are at just about every home game. They’re usually up in the owner’s box. It’s rare if they sit in the stands. The box is more convenient for snacks and bathroom breaks.”
“Edvin, Gabriel, and Harry-“
“I don’t need to know.” Avery cuts Nadene off. “It’s all speculative, right?”
“No, I know things.” Nadene says. “We hang out with the guys often, and their voices carry. Gabriel is the youngest, and still fucks around. Edvin is single, but we all think he has a secret someone because there are always two cars parked in his two designated spots at the condo complex, but no one ever talks about it.”
“All of the guys live in the same complex?” Avery asks.
“Most of them do, yeah. Mostly during the season, during the off-season, a lot of them leave to go home to be with family. It’s easier for them to be close to the Garden for practice and stuff. The traffic here is so bad, a lot of them just walk. Anders bought a house out in Brookline for him and his family, it’s pretty cute. But, yeah, the rest of the guys are in our building. We have a leasing contract with the owner of the building.” Claudia explains. “How else would you afford to live here?” She laughs.
“I guess I hadn’t even thought about it. I suppose I should have since the three of us all have places there.” Avery blinks.
“Are you nervous for the pre-season?” Nadene asks her. “All of the guys will be coming in for weightlifting and drills soon.”
“Not so much nervous…more so hoping they’ll listen to what I tell them to do and participate in the things I’ve planned.”
“They will.” Claudia assures Avery. “They care a lot about this organization. They’re all sweethearts at their core.”
For Avery’s sake, she sure hopes Claudia is right.
**
A week later, Avery’s called into the conference room that the coach usually reviews tape with the players in. It’s where a lot of team meetings are held. The coach, Martin, the GM, Oliver, and Nadene are all in there. She and Avery share a small smile. All of the guys watch as Avery walks in.
“Ah, Miss Malden.” Oliver smiles warmly at her. “Everyone, this is Avery Malden, our new PR and social media specialist. You all were sent an email about her when she was hired. Miss Malden’s got a ton of amazing ideas to help reach a larger audience. You will give her the upmost respect and abide by the assignments she tasks you with. She’s already got a calendar of potential charity appearances set up, and she’ll be coming to most away games to get exclusive footage of warmups and locker room interviews. You all know the drill when a lady walks into the locker room: you immediately cover up with a towel or shorts. Miss Malden doesn’t want to see any of your junk, got it?”
A collective, ‘yes, sir’, sounds through the room. Oliver looks at Avery and nods for her to say a few words.
“Hi, everyone.” She looks out to the men sitting before her, making eye contact with most of them. “I’m really happy to be here. I grew up in the area and have a deep love for the Bruins. This team has such a remarkable history. I’m honored to be a part of it.”
“Going forward, I need all of you to give Miss Malden access to all of your Instagram accounts so she can easily login as each of you when she needs to post something. It’ll be easier than her having to remind all of you to post things. You’ll notice in your packets there’s some information on media literacy. Miss Malden needs you all to go in and check your privacy settings. We don’t want random people tagging you in inappropriate posts. And if they do, we want to be able to review and either accept or deny their tag. We also need all of you to turn DM’s off when it comes to responding to stories. No one should be sliding in.” A few of the men groan and roll their eyes. “If you’re that desperate to hook up with a fan, download one of those stupid-ass apps that everyone else uses. Or be a normal person and pick someone up at a bar.” A few of the guys laugh at that.
“Things may feel strict at first,” Avery chimes in, “but it won’t feel like that for long. You all still have total autonomy over your accounts, we’re just trying to clean some less than favorable things up to continue forward with a family friendly atmosphere. Tik Tok is where we’ll be able to be a little sillier.”
“Thank you, Miss Malden.” Oliver smiles. “You’re free to go.”
Avery smiles and leaves. She takes a deep breath, proud of herself for keeping it together. She’ll be able to get through the season just fine.
**
After Avery left, Oliver and Nadene headed out to give Martin time with his boys. Once they’re dismissed, they all head to the locker room to pick up any new uniform stuff that may be waiting for them in their cubbies.
“Holy shit, did you see that social media girl?” Gabriel shakes his head. “I never really understood why Ivan had such a thing for a woman in a pencil skirt, but I do now.”
“Shut up.” Ivan nudges Gabriel. “Don’t talk about Claud.”
“I didn’t name drop her, you just did.” Gabriel grins.
“Don’t even allude to her.” Ivan says.
Harry doesn’t pay much attention to the chatter. He says goodbye to his teammates, who he’ll see later at Niall’s for a team dinner, then makes his way to the administrative offices. When he reaches Avery’s office, he knocks on the doorframe.
“It’s open.” She says without looking up. Harry clears his throat, getting her attention. “Oh.” She stands up.
“We have to stop meeting like this.”
“You mean randomly every two years?”
“Yeah.” He chuckles. “What’s that quote that’s like, ‘if I had a nickel every time I saw you, I’d only have two nickels, which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it’s happened twice,’ or whatever?”
“Seems like you know the whole thing.” She smirks. “Would you mind closing the door?” Harry does so, then steps further into the office. “Before you say something flirty or cute, or call me bunny, we need to be on the same page about some things. I haven’t told anyone that I sort of know you. I don’t want to be known as the girl who slept with Harry Styles around here. I don’t want anyone to think you had something to do with me working here.”
“If you want to keep things under wraps, then I’ll respect that.” He shrugs a shoulder. “I mostly came down here to say hi, and tell you I won’t try to fuck you since I’m going to end up seeing you almost every day. It would complicate things, and I know when starting a new job…you probably don’t want things to be complicated. Nothing to worry about on my end.”
“Do you seriously never fuck people twice?”
“I think we both know that I occasionally do.”
“You know what I mean.” She rolls her eyes playfully.
“If I fuck someone more than once, that eventually leads to expectations, and relationships are so uncertain. If I bring someone into my world, it needs to be good for everyone I have around me. It needs to be intentional, and I’m not ready for all of that.”
“Don’t you ever get lonely, though?”
“No, not really.” He runs a hand through his hair. “How are you single?”
“What?” She chuckles.
“You’re definite girlfriend material, I don’t know how a guy hasn’t snatched you up yet.”
“You think I’m girlfriend material based on what? You don’t know anything about me.”
“I know enough. That pussy,” he points to the area, “that’s girlfriend pussy.”
“You’re an idiot!” She laughs, throwing her head back. “I’ve been focused on my career, I don’t know. I also have trust issues. See, I hooked up with this guy once, and he asked for my number, told me we’d see each other again, and then he ghosted me.”
“Didn’t I already make up for that?”
“You did.” She nods. “So…what are we?”
“My favorite question in the whole world.”
“I mean, like, are we colleagues, acquaintances? Did you want to try and be friends? I know Nadene and Claudia are gonna notice a vibe.”
“If anyone asks, we can say we met at a college party years ago.” He shrugs. “It’s not a lie. And, I don’t know, do you think it’s safe to be friends? I feel like if I’m alone with you for too long, I’m gonna need to fuck you. Even now we’re already pushing it.”
“Colleagues, then.” She smiles softly. “I’m okay with that if you are.”
“We live in the same building. So how about colleagues and acquaintances.”
“Works for me.”
“Cool; well, welcome to the Bruins,” he opens her door, then looks over his shoulder to look at her, “bunny.”
**
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theovalentine · 1 year ago
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can you write Jake webber reader and Johnny in a Walmart video and some guy comes up and tries to hit on Y/n and jake gets all mad and there’s a fight?:)
Candle Isle
Summary: Jake texts you telling you, him, and Johnnie are going to Walmart for a valentines themed video and then you get there this guy starts hitting on you.
Pairing: Jake Webber x reader
Tw: violence, blood, random dude being a creep, Jake and Johnnie jokes (if this counts), cussing.
2k+ words
A/N: please note that i haven't written fanfic in a while so this writing might be a little bad but thank you so much for the request!
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Jake had texted you two hours ago asking for you to film a video and Johnnie. He said you guys would go to Walmart and just fuck around and buy a bunch of random stuff for another video for Johnnie’s channel. 
You and Jake had been dating for a few months now so of course you had made small appearances in some videos and filmed for them every now and then but you haven't done a full video with them yet. You were excited and nervous at the same time. More nervous than anything but Jake assured you that he would make sure you were fine the whole time. 
Your phone buzzed “I'm here” 
You gathered your things you needed to leave the house, locked the door, then walked down the stairs of the apartment building and saw Jake waiting for you at the door. Jake hears the door close so he turns around with a smile on his face
“Hey” you say and walk over to him looking up at him slightly. 
“Hey you look good” he puts his hand on your waist and leans down for a quick kiss and you smile into it. He starts leading you to the car holding your hand.
“Sorry we’re a little late Johnnie took forever to get ready” you simply nod and laugh a little bit
Jake walks around the car to the passenger side and opens the door for you and you quickly slide into the seat
“Hey Johnnie what's up” you say as Jake walks around the car to get in the car.
You have known Johnnie for quite a while now just from filming videos with a few of his friends and eventually he became really close with Jake and introduced you guys to each other about six months ago.
Jake gets in the car and we all agree to film an intro in the car at Walmart to be more discreet  because Walmart doesn't necessarily like people filming in the store. 
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
Jake eventually finds a parking spot and sets up the camera on the dash. 
“Everyone ready” he puts thumbs up and turns around slightly in his seat to see Johnnie in the back seat.
You and Johnnie both nod and let Jake press record. 
“We are here at Walmart and we are going to look around and eventually I'm gonna get my lady something from the valentine's section” 
“Aww that's sweet” you say and look at jake
“My lady being this hot babe in the back seat” jake pointed at johnnie
“Hell yeah get fucked” johnnie looked at you with your jaw dropped and you laughed
“No but for real this is my valentine next to me and I'm just getting johnnie whatever he wants because he is lonely” Jake joked.
“Dude what the- let's get out of here” johnnie heads to get out.
You all get out of the car and head inside and on the way to the entrance while the cameras weren't rolling Jake turned to you and asked if you were comfortable. You simply smiled and nodded.
Entering the store Jake pulls out his phone to start filming again “okay guys do we want a cart?”
“Can I ride in it?” Johnnie says to the camera
“I know something you could ride” Jake jokes back at him and smirks
“Jake your girlfriend is here take it easy” he slightly whispers 
Jake pans the camera to you and you're just standing there staring at them. They both laugh at you and you just smile while grabbing a cart.
“Hop in” You tell Johnnie 
“Wait actually?” he hops in and you try to push the cart but struggle a little bit
Jake laughs at your struggle “Johnnie i think she's struggling a bit there buddy” Johnnie laughs and hops out the cart 
“Here y/n get in” Johnnie then lets you get in and starts pushing the cart while Jake films. 
Eventually you guys make your way to the candle section
“This is where i lose all my money to y/n” jake looks at you
“Let me get out, I love candles” you hop out of the cart and start looking at candles. Jake and Johnnie are on the other side of the aisle looking at other candles and cracking up over jokes.
“Yall I'm not gonna lie I'm going to piss my pants if i don't go to the bathroom right now” Jake says 
“Okay go we will wait here” Johnnie said 
Jake left quickly and you laughed at his dramatic urgency. Johnnie is only halfway down the aisle from you now, both of you just looking at candles silently.
You are bent down looking at the bottom shelf when you hear two guys behind you laughing. You weren't sure if it was at you but you were not taking that chance so you took your candles that you picked out to put in the cart and then walked over to Johnnie telling him you were slightly uncomfortable. 
You and Johnnie headed to the next aisle over so you weren't too far from where Jake would try to find you. You guys were looking at simple stuff on the shelves when two guys came up to you. You assumed it was the guys laughing just before. 
“Hey Sweetheart” one of these guys came up to you with his friend not too far behind him. He looked to be about college age or maybe just graduated but definitely still had the frat vibe. 
“Uhm Hi” You looked at him confused then turned to look at Johnnie with a weirded out look. He was already on his phone texting Jake about the situation. 
“Is this your boyfriend?” he looked around you to look at Johnnie waving his fingers as if he was  saying hi
“No but-” you tried to say your actual boyfriend was here but he had cut you off
“Oh so you're single” he gave you the most disgusting grin. You turned to Johnnie who had a slightly scared look on his face. You could tell that Johnnie wanted to do or say something about this but you also could tell that he had never been in a fight in his life and was scared to get beat up. You couldn't blame him.
“Well-” he had cut you off again. 
“Because me and my friend here think you're super cute and he bet me that I wouldn't be able to get your number” He pointed at his friend behind him. 
Before you could think of an answer you felt an arm around your shoulder. Looking over you saw it was Jake and his hand was cold from where he had just washed them. Not only did his cold hand calm you but him just showing back up filled you with relief. 
“Yeah she is pretty cute but sadly for you and happily for me she's taken” jake looked at him and tried to lighten the mood
“And you are?” He straightened his posture to ‘intimidate’ Jake but Jake wasn't having it. 
“Her boyfriend. Did you not pick that up from the ‘shes taken’ comment” Jake looked at this guy like he was the most stupid person in the world and removed his arm from around your shoulder. 
“Are you calling me dumb?” The guy cocked his head at Jake.
“Not necessarily but you must be if you didn't pick up on the fact that she didn't want you from how uncomfortable she is” Jake quickly shot back at this guy. 
“Come on she wasn't uncomfortable until you showed up” The guy rolled his at jake
“Hm, Really?” Jake turned to you and you looked down “No i think i know my girlfriend enough to say she was definitely uncomfortable”
“Lets ask her then” this guy leans over and tries to look at your face “huh love are you uncomfortable” you simply try to back up
“Bro don't get in her face like that” Jake pushes his shoulder lightly just to back him up a little bit.
“Hey don't touch me” The guy got angry and Jake steps in front of you to try and seem intimidating. 
“Maybe stop bothering us then” Jake grabs your hand and turns around and you guys try to leave
“Yeah, follow your owner like a pet.” This comment not only upset you but as soon as Jake saw the look on your face he immediately turned around.
Everything was happening so fast that by the time you felt Jake let go of your hand you turned around to see his fist hitting the creeps face. Immediately gasping you try to go and stop him but you feel Johnnie’s hand grab your arm. He didn't want you to get hurt as well.
“JAKE!” you try to stop him but by the time you got to him the other guys friend had already grabbed him and told him they needed to run before the cops got there.
You grab Jake's arm and he is breathing heavily, you turn him around quickly to look at him. 
“Oh my god, Jake you're bleeding” you grab his face lightly not wanting to hurt him
“Oh” he touches his face lightly to see the blood on his fingers
“Come on put your hood on we are leaving” you told him you pull his hood on for him and you guys just leave the cart behind. 
Johnnie follows quietly as you guys make your way out the store to the car. 
“I'm driving okay I'm not letting your drive after that you get that right?” you tell jake and he understands. You all get in the car and you realize he's been pretty quiet. “You good?” you turn to him asking softly and he nods. 
“God jake you have the longest fucking legs in existence” struggling to adjust the car seat. Everyone slightly laughs realizing you're trying to lighten the mood. 
“It's not my fault you're short” he comments back at you.
“I'm not that short” you roll your eyes
ੈ✩‧₊˚
You guys end up at the boys house and everyone gets out and walks in and Johnnie goes to his room. 
“Come on let's get you cleaned up” you put your bag down and grab Jake's hand dragging him towards the bathroom.
You both enter the bathroom and shut the door behind you as he leans against the counter and you walk over to him.
“Where do you want me?” he asks lowly and you could tell he feels bad.
“Well if you stand there i won't be able to reach you” you smile at him and shake your head lightly.
Jake puts his hands on your waist and turns you around and lifts you up onto the counter. 
“Better?” he asks and you think you might lose your mind. 
“Better.” you stare at him analyzing his face and injuries. He has a split eyebrow with dried blood running down his face, he also has a split lip. “Your lip hurt?” you look up at him with caring eyes because of his fresh piercings. 
“Oh yeah I'm not gonna lie I feel like it's gonna fall off” you laugh at him looking at it more deeply.
“Get the first aid kit and I'll clean it up to see if we need to remove the piercing” he immediately leans over to get the first aid kit from under the bathroom counter. As he does this you turn your body to wash your hands. He hands it to you and you set it on the counter next to you pulling out an alcohol wipe. You open it, wrapping it around your finger lightly tapping his eyebrow. After cleaning up his eyebrow you put a butterfly bandage on it. 
“Now the hard part” you pull his lip down lightly and he winces softly. “I think you should take the piercing out just in case” he groans and throws his head back. He had just got another put in because he swallowed the last one. “I know i know but i wouldn't want it to get infected and make your lip fall off, how would i kiss you then??” 
“Okay fine but I'm making you take it out you have smaller fingers.” you take out his lip piercing and clean it up.
“If it wasn't already swollen before it definitely is now” you joke a little “there isn't another injury on the lip he must have just hit the piercing and it got agitated” he puts his hand on your hips and squeezes a little trying not to hurt you. You clean it up a little more and put some ointment on it for now.  
“Are you mad?” he looks down at your lap. You put your hands on his chest in a comforting way 
“A little but also not at all. If that makes sense? I don't really like violence but I also really love a boyfriend who sticks up for me and cares about my comfort.” you rub your hand against his shoulder and tilt your head at him. He looks at you and nods. 
“Okay” he goes quiet for a second “how long until we can kiss again?” you press a light kiss against the corner of his mouth without the ointment. 
“Just a little because I'm not kissing your ointment lip sorry” you smile at him and he groans but then laughs brushing it off. 
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bokunoheros · 10 months ago
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ཐིཋྀ KINKTOBER - day 12 squirting : shouta aizawa/eraserhead
warnings : afab reader, reader and aizawa are married, y’all have a cat, pussy slapping (pun probably intended), this is doo-doo dog shit, like this actually sucks, doo doo fart ass, dookie, poo poo fart, smegma, this fic reads like what sharting yourself feels like, this fic smells like the family bathroom at walmart, we’re fucking twelve (not literally), don’t expect anything else genuinely, butt, pretend this was never posted, PLEASE, day 12 is NOT REAL, THEY HIT THE PENTAGON— MR PRESIDENT GET DOW— bill gates did it, bill cypher is canon, squirting, fingering idk, eating ass, butthole rimming, 2024 election, ellen digestive did 9/11, Trump x Biden, 9/11, hilary emails included, proof of aliens existence, video footage of the area 51 raid, UFOs, alien butt sex, wrong usage of condoms, anal probing, biological dna harboring, sickle cell anemia, KLANCE is canon, Steven universe, major character death, gem fusions, love children, feel like cinderella naega byeonhae, NETFLIX ORIGIONAL, only on Hulu, Elsa x Jackfrost smut, playdough, me x YOU, tiana x nanami au, your mom x me, sarcamouche x kazuha, xiao x venti, improper use of crack cocaine, making herion, mentions of drug mules, dead dove: do eat, improper use of magic, meth making, cocaine balloons bursting, Harry Potter x Snape, hermoine x the whomping willow, herobrine x steve, unfortunate uses of pixels, bakudeku slime, hnnng harder daddy, mmhppgh— yeah yeah right there, cum consumption, cumflation, feeder fetish, oh yeah, koolaid man x me, very improper use of koolaid packets, nickacaco avocado weight loss journey, apology videos (tears included), , banjos, jake paul dcead body in forest footage (NOT CLICKBAIT), live leak posts, webtoon origional, anal stretching, did you know the human anus can stretch to the size of a raccoon?, now you know that, and also, the sun will explode June 17th, 3028, character flaws, bodily anatomy, your balls will explode on october 21st at 7:99am, my gleeby deeby ass, futurama, Micheal Angelo, improper use of abortions, medical surgery on a grape, plastic surgery, baby killing, tampon usage, description of endangered animal poaching, Mario Kart, tuberculosis, ima get it donnnne oh aye oh aye oh, butt stuff, dazai x chuuya, atsushi x akutagawa, mpreg, mad cow disease, omegaverse, ranpo x me, Dream SMP, matpat x scott cowthan, michael afton x freddy fazbear, aggressive typing, bath salts, bath salt inhalation, whippets, galaxy gas, all might is a bottom, skinny men, carrington x shigaraki, anorexia anorexia anorexia, afo x nana shimura, BLOODY MARY, BLOODY MARY, BLOODY MARY, TW gun law debates, tenko x mon, Amazon delivery, school shootings, talk of gun laws, bad dragon toys, silicon, aoyama belly button leaking, lego ninjago r34, ninja turtles r34, bloody mary r34, kamala harris r34, tenya iida x tensei iida, jesus x judas, luigi x bowser, sonic and shadow makeout sesh, i fuck your dad, suck his dick reallll nice, penis sounding with dirty twig, orgasm denial, overstimulation, xenotransplants, oviposition, diaper Taco Bell, people die, revival, dark magic, ecoterrorism, global warming, chemical warfare, wanda x the winter soldier, haruhi x tamaki suoh, cosmo x wanda, comicon, bronies, pegasisters, mentions of twilight sparkle dying, twiilight sparkle x mordecai, air planes, shootings stars, night skies, NLE Choppa, we could really use a wish bro, TuPac is back, floppa carts: plompy haze, death of a platform known as tumblr, twitter referred to as X, elon musk creates sex robot that specializes in butthole sex, Tesla sex robot, androids that FUCK, necrophilia, android phone usage, pheromones, premonitions and words of Jesus, divine intution, potion making, heavenly visions, satan, satanic visions, the heavenly principles, celestia is above mondstadt, spiritual healing, veganism, white washing, canon hispanic hanta sero, futanari, blasian mina ashido, bovine spongiforms, Tenya Iida virginity loss, bakugo is a fucking faggot, handjobs, footjobs, peaceful protests, the government is controlling you through vaccines, asian fishing,
vaccines might cause autism, freshwater fishing, they will, xenophobia, hentai hucows, incest, usage of slurs, starbucks coffee, lizards run the world, obama might be a lizard, inappropriate use of baby oil, gojo x getou, day twelve never existed and it was all a lie.
word count : 420k words and 69 pages
🐙 note : we are not locked in we are as loose as a ran through sorority president
🦊 note : i am. i have no words. idek what happened. we ran out of time so we went with the option we thought might make people giggle (no we didnt we did this bullshit for ourselves)(your regularly scheduled content will resume tmr!)
🪲 note : i ain’t fucking sorry
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you adored your husband—shouta aizawa—so much so, that you were his dedicated housewife. he made plenty of money as a pro hero and… enough… as a teacher, so that left you to take care of the house and your shared cat. though when he did come home he was way different than he was at work, usually at work he was all nonchalant and cold but at home he was sweet and caring, sometimes even a bit rough. his students would definitely describe him as laid back and uninterested, yet when you were around they were in awe of his personality shift.
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lizzy-luvbot · 1 year ago
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Hiya! I was wondering if you could general relationship headcanons for the marble hornet guys? Thank you!
YIPPIE FIRST REQUEST!! And ofc I can! I hope it’s as good as you expected!
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Character’s- Tim Wright/masky, Brian Thomas/hoodie, jay Merrick, Alex Kralie + bonus character!
I tried my best to make it as gender neutral as possible!
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Tim Wright/masky:
Would be like INSANELY AWKWARD at first
You met through Brian, him being your siblings best friend
Your sibling invited you to explore an abandoned building with him, Brian and Tim(who at the time you didn’t know)
I don’t know if it’s just me but he would definitely call you his wife/husband when you come up in conversation
“How many people are your party?” The hostess of your favorite restaurant asks, “just me and my wife/husband” Tim says without thinking.
He will be slightly embarrassed but you think it’s so fucking cute
Not big on PDA👎 but literally ALWAYS has to be holding your hand no matter‼️
I picture him to be kind of traditional, like you walk on the inside of the sidewalk away from the road, he holds doors open for you, pulls out your chair for you and pushes it in.
A MASSIVE cheek(the ones on your face…) kisser.
Like boom just got home? He’s grabbing your chin and kissing both of your cheeks then asking you how your day was.
Masky:
You probably won’t see him much but he always seems to be there when you need him…
Brian Thomas/hoodie:
Y’all knew eachother all through your school years, elementary, middle, and high school.
So you basically knew anything and everything about eachother.
He’s like the bestest friend you could ever have
And yes Tim is a third wheel… but not the severely excluded one, the one that you’d probably kill your self if you even got the smallest hint he felt left out.
I feel like he’s not a hater nor a huge fan of PDA, it’s like he will have a arm around your shoulders, and while your talking to your friends/strangers you decided to strike up conversation with, he will randomly lean down and kiss the top of your head
Or when your holding hands he will kiss the back of your hand.
When I say you two can’t go anywhere I mean it.
You’ve been kicked out of Walmart so many times for thinking you can jump over the cardboard crate’s of Powerade.
And don’t think he’s stopping you, in fact he eggs you on by saying he doesn’t believe you can’t and your gonna have to prove it too him.
“Fuck yeah I can.” You said irritation radiating of you, “no you literally can’t.” “Yes I ‘literally’ can.” You two go back and forth for like three minutes until he smirks and says prove it. And prove it you do.
You cleared the Powerade’s no problem but too bad a Karen with a fuck ass bob saw it and snitched on you.
Hoodie:
(Like masky) you don’t see him a lot…but he sure see’s you…
Jay Merrick:
The absolute sweetest boyfriend you could ever ask for… but very sassy.
Ask him for some water?
“Baby, can you get me some water?” “No” NO?!?!
Then 30 seconds later he walks around the corner with a glass of water.
Now unlike the other two he loves PDA, it’s like the fact he knows he bagged a baddie and he’s about to make it known to everyone.
Loves having his hair played with and vise versa, you definitely teach him how to use a hair straightener/curler just so you don’t have to do it yourself.
You two play just dance. And definitely do karaoke using the instrumental music videos on YouTube.
CLINGY BRO SO FUCKING CLINGY.
You gotta pee during the Friday movie night session at home? So does he.
You don’t want to cuddle because it’s 80 degrees?? Do you not love him?? You guys cuddle anyway.(you turned down the air conditioning because you didn’t want him to be sad)
He calls you anything but your name. Once you started dating you were no longer [name] you were baby, babe, honey, girlfriend/boyfriend when he’s feeling extra sassy.
He loves to be a hater with you. You don’t like one of your coworkers, he gives them the most DIRTY look when he sees them when he’s visiting you.
Alex Kralie:
He’s such a nonchalant dreadhead.(please don’t kill me) joking but fr he acts like he doesn’t care as much as he does(which is SOOOOO much btw)
A member of the sassy man apocalypse.
He’s a play fighter, like “body slam”s you into the bed.
Has a gun collection in the garage. And gives you pop quizzes about them. He will never say it but he thinks the dumbfounded look on your face when asks you a question about a gun that is the cutest thing ever.
You called him snookum cake one time. ONE TIME. And now he never calls you anything else but snookum cake.
Out in public? He doesn’t give a fuck.
“Alex. Please don’t.” Your terror clear on your face. He smirks, tilting his head down, the dim blue lights from the aquarium In front of you causing shadows on his face, he takes a deep breath, “are you liking the aquarium SNOOKUM CAKE.” His voice raised from a 3 to a 7 at the nickname. Causing people too shoot you and him dirty and confused looks.
You never called him that again.
(Bonus character)
Jessica Locke(my cutie patootie):
PDA QUEEN.
She doesn’t care if y’all are eating at McDonald’s or a 5-star restaurant. If she wants to kiss your entire face, she will damnit and fuck what everyone else as to say.
She’s your biggest supporter, literally doesn’t care what it is she’s on your side 10000%.
Y’all definitely slow dance to Lana del Rey In the kitchen while the frozen pizza cooks.
I feel like she’s such a alpha male😜
Like she’s willing to fight for you, fist fight and her comebacks are like the best you’ve ever heard.
Y’all definitely wear matching socks and ugly Christmas sweaters during the holiday season.
She slaps the fuck out of your butt. You live in fear of her surprisingly powerful butt smacks.
You guys wear matching Clair’s bff necklaces.
Im sorry is this is Probably so bad😭😬 anyway I actually bought a Jay plushy not too long ago and it’s finally shipped so I’m super excited for that🔥‼️ NOT EDITED‼️‼️ as soon as I saw the request I got so excited so I wrote it ever tho I should be asleep right now so I’ll have to edit another time😓
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