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floorpancakes · 2 months ago

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Are you excited about xxxHOLIC Rei coming back in less than a week?? (Also, a lot of blogs got flagged lately, you can read more about it on the wip blog!)

my answer is yes. but also no. but also im terrified. but also im so fucking excited. but i will be WATCHING CLAMP LIKE A HAWK... lemme explain.

the main run of xxxholic is almost untouchably impressively perfectly good. i change my opinion depending on the day but rou is simultaneously insanely impressive and real as fuck but also where a couple of the endgame decisions really begin to feel like the wrong ones - I fucking LOVE it especially how it portrays barely restrained want and depressive decay with adult characters, but we all know how I feel about how utterly optional and avoidable the kohane thing was (they could've done the exact same non romantic oomf marriage agreement that watanuki inevitably chooses to misconstrue to beat himself up thing w the same effects w hima and it would've been more interesting but we know how much clamp likes to shove teacher student age gap into shit even when it ISNT romantic and they would not fucking do that...) and I don't like that the moral of the story for 99 percent of chapters is 'watanuki fucking suffers with no end in sight and retracts into himself instead of growing from trauma', but also I love tragedy and angst and mental health and mutual situationship metaphors and watanuki in this era is more relatable to me than ever before unfortunately so I hold my mixed feelings but I also enjoy it super super hard for the most part. Pls note that the moral dilemma I have about rou isn't that watanuki is suffering at all, but that he's suffering seemingly with no ...exit??? In sight? Like. We don't have any relief for him in his future, so I guess that's what sours me on some of it as a whole rather than actually abt the media quality itself. Long story I hope this makes sense. We all know how much I love rouposting so I hope it checks out.

So I was already very much a fan when Rei became a thing. I remember watching new stuff come out so I was one of the people 'fooled' in the beginning by the fake reboot setup. I knew something was happening but I wasn't sure what, and the series slowly showing its hand was super interesting. I famously love the ominous chasing hands and the thing with the phone, and imo the STRONGEST part of rei that we found out later is the interactions between characters influenced by their adult selves jumping out (think watanuki clearly leaning in to yuuko's jabs, watanuki taking the wife jokes with way less resistance, watanuki having a more platonic stronger bond with hima, watanuki accidentally slipping into the slutty boss persona then fucking exploding blushing while talking to doumeki LOL, among other things). I find that aspect really interesting and it's something only clamp could do in this specific situation which is rly rly fun. So umm. I guess we knew this would end eventually but when the end of arc was approaching I think I had my first real time groan with the series: yuuko is saying watanuki can choose, and noone will judge, and either choice is ok, he can stay with the people he loves or he can go home to his old life: but is that really true? Perhaps yuuko thinks so, but the way the story shows it to us, watanuki HAS to reply to those hands. There's so many, they're so in need, they need his presence in the universe too badly, they put pressure on him and weigh the decision so it's like 'go into the dream world and get what you want and just let everyone else get fucked up forever', it just feels like. He doesn't really have an option if he wants to not come off like a dick, and that's quite weird to me, it paints him in a weird light if he wants to choose happiness for himself, even if it's a slightly more hollow one. It feels like the sort of thing holic wouldn't typically do since it's a series that likes to play with the idea that choosing things for yourself and your own happiness is a kind of selfishness that's often VERY necessary, especially if you're someone that's hurting and needs their people around them.

....So imagine the look on my face when it turned out all of this was a massive fetch quest for tsubasa reservoir chronicle.

I've never finished tsuba, I read like half of it a year or so ago and unfortunately it hasn't clicked with me yet, and neither have most of the characters. I plan on finishing it eventually and I know it gets juicy in the back half, but I've always had mixed opinions on holitsuba being marketed as a pair, especially when especially on the western side people like both but tsuba is their ACTUAL favourite, or they like both but tsuba gets more attention, or more discussion, or more merch, or more whatever. I'm aware I'm a bit of a hater about it but it's mostly nothing personal and I do really WANT to like it, but they're fundamentally very different kinds of stories and inevitably people will have their preferences or perhaps be more into one than the other yaknow. I'm aware all of my oomfs are tsuba enjoyers. I promise my haterdom isn't that serious. I'm happy for yall.

HOWEVER please imagine me in 2016 reading the chapter when it dropped and you can imagine the worlds biggest crash out of all time. Mind you I'd still feel weird about this even if I loved tsuba to death, and maybe one day I will, but holy fucking SHIT the impact of them weighing all this on watanukis shoulders only to essentially be like 'oh, watanuki got put through ALL of this to grab a Thingamajig for Some Guy (ik he's not just some guy ik the lore but narratively speaking)' . ..... I am sure even if you like tsubasa a lot this is probably a strange fucking thing to do, and this combined with clamp DROPPING THE SERIES FOR LIKE 8 YEARS immediately afterwards...??? I am still fucking baffled by this. It lowkey ruined my trust in clamp forever. What did they mean by this. Why did they think this was a good idea. What the fuck were they cooking ?:?:?:?:

Fun fact: i know there's a small handful of chapters that come after the arc ender. I have not read them since they came out. I barely remember them. I have been avoiding them out of spite. I will re-catch up soon obviously but jesus fucking c hrist 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 clamp you can't just do that to people!!! It makes it look like you hate your characters and your fans!!! Good lord!?

so basically that brings us to the present. I'm super excited, because I love xxxholic and even during Rei the chapter to chapter content was super impressive (my problems are mostly big decisions) but it also makes me think: where do we have to go from here? Where do THEY want to go from here? We've lost almost all of our main characters aside from yokai who brush in and out of watanuki's life and his shop mascot oomfs, watanuki is still depressed, arguably far more now , he has no way out, none of the doumekis have used the egg and we can't see a use for it (in canon at least) where it will even change anything now. There's many directions this could go, but unless they get really gutsy with some deus ex machina (please please please please here's how doumeki could still win please) it's hard to know what they even want to do to round this off or revive it from where it stands.

Unfortunately most of the options I can think of that I think clamp MIGHT do are things I don't really like . I can't tell how much of this is me being overly cautious or if any of this will actually happen but here's some horror stories I have rattling about in my brain that I hope WON'T happen:

- all doumekis are secretly doumeki (i don't like this!! I think they're more interesting as separate people and it would be weird as shit to act like say sayaka x watanuki is the same as shizuka x watanuki. i like the idea that the sameface doesn't mean they're the same kinda people, a la haruka)

- watanuki is secretly clow (please god no. please god no no thank you i don't like that)

- watanuki is egged and just let loose onto the world with no support system (this would be the worst payback for all of his suffering)

- watanuki remains here forever with no hope of seeing anyone of the main cast he loves again (kill)

- im actually someone who prefers yuuko coming back agnosticism to her reincarnating as a random person. i think it's more interesting that way and she wouldn't want him to have to desperately seek her out while crashing out for hundreds of years. she'd want better than that for him even knowing some things are inevitable. so all the yuuko seeking type chapters we've had so far are not of great interest to me. this is actually how I came up with canary from catverse. canary is the endless numb stasis of a life devoted to hunting for yuuko and nothing else regardless of her wishes for him to live a good life.

- idk man. some clamp bullshit

- tsubasa reservoir chronicle fetch quest...2!!

...I don't know what we're gonna get. I don't know what to expect. I am excited and I am nervous and I am dreading it a little bit too. We shall see I guess but the way they left us off with Rei hiatus and the arc ended drove me insane for YEARS OF MY LIFE. so this is how I'm feeling rn. I hope watanuki is freed from his suffering. I hope doumeki, actual doumeki, gets a presence and gets to go crazy go stupid. I hope yuuko gets a presence or non presence that befits her and she's not used as a thing to wrangle around watanuki's suffering to new heights. I hope watanuki gets happiness and progress after at least a hundred years of regression and stasis. I hope they care more about character happiness and the spirit of the story and not trying to connect it to other plots in manga they may or may not prefer and holic doesn't get more weird middle child treatment. I hope we get a w for watanuki and no annoying plot twists that sacrifice character dynamics for drama. I hope doumeki gets a madoka rebellion movie and also we get a whole volume of douwata sex as compensation . I would like to see himawari again and I don't care how. I have lost hope of them doing anything with kohane given how they sidelined her already to limply not quite fulfil the authors obvious fetish. I hope we all get a W for our long wait. I hope watanuki wears more dresses and serves cunt so hard xxxholic goes VIRAL amen

#xxxholic #xxxholic rei #yeah #hope this summarises my main thoughts #i dont actually hate tsuba i just have very complicated feelings abt how its treated as media and how its usually the favourite #i AM a proud kurogane anti tho #its funny #and i just have zero interest in him fjrjfjfjfk #i find this deeply funny #hes like reverse doumeki so i suppose this makes sense given i am obsessed with doumeki #'how do you want the gang back theyre all dead' i would like them to pull some nonsense that means they get to be HAPPY #I dont care if it doesnt make sense we need compensation #watanuki has already hit rock bottom so we cant have him end on a crash out they already did that #this used to be the hope and unconditional love will help you deal with your depression manga we need some hope injections

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completeoveranalysis · 2 years ago

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NEW FAVOURITE COVER?

NEW FAVOURITE COVER!

Chapitre 201 - The Truth from within the Ruins

Oh this is just beyond gorgeous. Who can stand against the pure concentrated adorable that is Tsubasa Babies Family Photo? Now with all four of them!

I’m in love with all the tiny details that they clearly spent so long on - all the lovely folds of Sakura’s dress, the intricate detailing on Fai’s robe and staff. Lava Lamp is in his ceremonial garb, and tiny Kurogane IN HIS FANCY LITTLE OUTFIT. (AND HIS POSTURE? GET OUT. Incredible)

Kurogane doesn’t have Ginryuu yet (since this is Happy Childhood AU, so his father will still have it. Still has the moon though!) but Lava Lamp has the Syaoran Family Sword all ready to go. His outfit would be incomplete without it - they’re all wearing clothing from their home worlds, or maybe their families? I’m technically not sure which world Lava Lamp comes from, but his outfit is Family Legacy all the way down. I’m dying to know if Fai’s outfit is in the style of Seresu or Valeria - I don’t think they’re all that different, but I think I would put my money on Valeria based on the position of the fur and the curl motif. In which case it’s fun for me that his Happy Family AU is in Valeria instead of with Ashura. (sorry not sorry Ashura get fucked)

I suppose in this version he never had reason to leave Valeria in the first place, so it’s a very nice touch that the outfit doesn’t immediately resemble the clothing he wore in his backstory, since that’s all so closely linked to the death of his twin, who would be alive here. Very nice visual choices all around, especially with each of them in their own unique colour pallette. Oh, and even with the colour differences they all have bits of yellow somewhere on them, showing their connection.

The left/right split between them is really fun too - sword wielders on one side, phenomenally powerful magic users on the other, cats vs dogs, unique child/parent pairings, etc. It’s very funny to me that they found a super fancy chair for Sakura and a cushion for Kurogane, but nothing for the other two. But Fai draping himself over the chair is such an incredible piece of character flair, which I am in love with, but also, the TOUCH? The little touch of tiny hands? Sakura reaching back to put her hand on the back of Fai’s? Tiny Lava Lamp’s little grip on Kurogane’s arm? OH it’s so touching.

And behind them all? THAT WINDOW. Such a clear symbol positioned directly in the centre frame. At first I thought it might be an eye, but this is Happy Family AU so there should be no Evil Wolverine to spy on them. What I’m voting on instead is CLAMP playing with Tarot symbols again and this being the Wheel of Fortune, or a similar idea of a wheel of destiny. They use the latter idea a lot in their earlier works (RG Veda and X/1999 say hi), but I think the tarot symbol in particular really shines through with the ideas they’re playing with in Tsubasa/xxxHolic, and has a very strong parallel to the idea of hitsuzen.

After some much safer googling it looks like the “Wheel of Fortune” in Tarot can mean change or cycles or inevitable fate, but on the flipside could also be lacking control. I think the reversed meaning of the card really speaks to me the most about their situation in general, as it describes bad luck and misfortunes thrust upon you from external forces, that you are fighting to take control back from an unwinnable situation. That fighting it is impossible, that continuing to fight it can only bring more suffering, and that the only option is to let it go. To stop blaming yourself for the thing you did wrong, or the thing that you think was your fault. To forgive yourself, to accept it all, to let yourself move on, to accept that change is inevitable, and to finally be able to move forward and just let everything happen.

Because if that’s not exactly the whole situation we are in I don’t know what is. It’s a mirror for the things that Fai and Kurogane have already been through, and for what Lava Lamp Guy is still currently fighting, and CLAMP love to do drop these symbols all the time.

And this is a bit of a tangent but who’s gonna stop me? Clamp LOVE their tragic destiny pairs, especially in their early works - the couples deeply love but also cursed by fate, like Kendappa and Souma, Ashura and Yasha (flavoured differently in RG Veda, but still fitting this cycle again in Tsubasa), Subaru and Seishirou, Sorata and Arashi (unfinished), Kamui and Fuuma, etc. The characters who are so different from each other, so diametrically opposed, but in love still, and it burns so strong that they either have to kill each other or let the world burn around them - or both! They’re always fighting destiny, just like the reversed wheel of fortune, and they fight it to the point of obliteration.

AND THEN we have Tsubasa, and I think it’s so endlessly interesting that they took the same pattern and turned it around. Syaoran and Sakura definitely fit the theme (and wild that they took the Cardcaptor Sakura happy couple deliberately to make the most universe shattering tragedy out of it, but I still haven’t seen how their story ends, whether one will have to tragically die to save everything or whether they’ll get out somehow). But what I mostly want to talk about (surprise surprise) Kurogane and Fai, who fit the pattern exactly. Complete opposites, diametrically opposed, set up as antagonists and destined to kill each other but fall in love instead. That they both fight against the tragic pasts that defined them and eventually change their mind. Eventually, slowly, they accept love again and realise that they can actually live with themselves and each other if they let it all go.

And I think what really gets me is that if this was an earlier Clamp work they absolutely would have tragically died - they would have killed each other in the climax of Seresu and it would have been beautiful and terrible and no-one ever would have ever emotionally recovered from the complete and utter devastation.

BUT THEY DIDN’T.

CLAMP spend all of Tsubasa revisiting all their old works, taking us through a parade of the various tragedies they’ve sung across the years, all leading up to them ultimately breaking their own pattern and letting Fai and Kurogane save each other from the same Clamp fate that claimed every tragic pair before them. They choose each other and get out alive. They stop blaming themselves for the unchangeable parts of destiny and finally forgive themselves. And it’s just very emotional to me that it’s these two that make it, these two that get to recover and choose each other and live their lives inseparable from this point on. The two that had arguably the most tragic backstories also get to face their trauma, survive, and live.

And it’s just so beautiful to see how the CLAMP storytelling method has changed over the years, and to find out that after all these years, the big destiny story they really wanted to tell in their longest and most detailed work was about the two men who fell in love, against all odds and saved each other. Despite absolutely everything saying that it should be impossible, it’s Kurogane and Fai that finally flip the tarot card back around and live.

And I’m extremely interested in what this means for Lava Lamp and Not!Sakura.

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