☆Blog for the Atlas system☆
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10
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7
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Setting out a source call for our Mark Greyson, he's open to talking to anybody from his source, especially his dad! He's newer in the system and seems pretty nice from what little I know! It'd be better to talk on discord if we attract any source buddies for the guy.
No minors and 21+ is preferred since we're in our 20s!
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Diagnosed DID system
This account is mostly for us to post about DID, and will hopefully stay syscourse free since I don't care about alldat.
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#I think so#I wrote him many endings#some less than ideal but a good few are happy#I'd hug him tightly and help guide him towards the path he wants the most#he's also like 6-10 depending on the point of his story so I feel like he'd be more inclined to seek comfort#rather than be angry
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"Online System Safe Spaces" : Choose Your Character
- unsupervised children
- suicide bait in the vent chat
- discussion of 18+ topics in the main channels
- "I don't wanna deal with this right now" moderator
- gooner pfp
- trauma olympics every week
- "DIY Recovery" self diagnosers
#never understood the explaining the human body type of things lol#splitting isnt giving birth to a newborn baby your subconscious is a lot more equipt to being human than that#even patients with dementia can remember basic things like that#sorry if that's mean but I always found it funny when people act like they know basically nothing when they're new
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ocd be like:
(my art pls credit if you use this for anything)
#For the longest time I didnt think I had OCD because we're messy#some of us arent but we've never really been organized
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In terms of advice for newly discovered systems that I don't see often, especially ones who might not have access to professional support, is that you're going to get things wrong about your own system and that's ok. Even if it seems like it would have been obvious in hindsight. Even if it makes you feel stupid or embarrassed. Even if it just happens to occur to you otherwise one day. Don't be scared to make mistakes
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I spent some time last night with one of my alters, C.G as I'll call him. He's a nice older man, very gentle, and he knows a lot about the system that we don't know. At about 3 in the morning I was having a lot of bad anxiety. He helped to guide me through it and was very kind, encouraged me to make myself some tea so that I could relax.
He judged me less for the mistakes I made that caused us to split so much than he did for me taking the tea bag and discarding it on a box near me instead of getting up and throwing it away. Priorities. Something about that is so comforting though. A guy who won't judge, who'll show you kindness and care. But god will he be bothered if you don't have decent manners. -🐝
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System culture is getting your Spotify Rewind back for the year and seeing who fronted and listened to music the most /lh
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System protector culture is Why do I constantly find myself fixing the mess others make.
They don't clean up what I do, and never have the face the consequences of their actions. It hurts, oddly enough, as I never really know what they did.
But I sometimes wished I had a day where I just fronted for fun, not to clean or fix things or get us out of a bad situation or have to apologize on the behalf of others.
-🏅
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Hhholy shit im a bad person
#posts this and refuses to elaborate#Well for some context i had a moment where i intentionally insulted someones fp when they made me mad#i'm in the wrong with no doubt about it since this person wasnt involved#but i had that clarity afterwards of why the fuck would i say or do that because it was actually so needlessly cruel#im just sorry and i wont be talking to that person for a while#i need to get back on the meds that helped with my bpd but that was just a shitty thing i did#i feel the need to self punish for what i did but im trying so hard to try and tell myself that it was a shitty action and#abnormal for my usual behavior and is something i can never do again but i just#aa#i love the bpd did combo personally
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sys culture is haha brain people haha always doing a group project haha so funny i'm never going to be alone my life isn't my own nothing about it is mine- haha half of my friends are in my head haha
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#It's always funny haha brain people until people realize it doesnt turn off#like ily david but i dont need your gay ass commentary sometimes
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system culture is constantly struggling with alters that want to reach out to abusers because they miss them and because of amnesia you don't even realise it until any damage is done :/
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I really fucking hate it here -Max
#I dont even have a shitty emoji#i havent been able to front in so long and only could because David got fucking upset and hurt by some asshole#whatever i did retail therapy so he can fucking thank me later
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Sometimes I wish that I hadn't met my fp at all and I feel guilty about it. But if I hadn't, I wouldn't need to feel so unhealthy about them or jealous over basically nothing all the time. I wouldn't have to miss them when I'm here and they aren't or vice versa and I wouldn't be anxious about driving them away with my care for them. Despite what my bad thoughts say I don't feel that way about them but that's another thing that'll occasionally pop up in my head and make me anxious.
Im not signing this post off with my emoji just incase, it's just a thought I wanted to post somewhere.
#i dont like the duality between i'm lucky to have met you and i wish i never had so that i might never inevitably lose you#thinking about it is so aaa
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honestly look at the bright side at least you’re not 14
I’M NOT FOURTEEN!!!!!!
#this makes me laugh because a lot of bad stuff happened at 14 to the point where i regularly regress to that time despite not remembering#much about it#everyone in the comments is all “you'll never be 14 again!!! 💚” the sentiment is great and true for most#but not for me and idk thats just kinda funny to me#nobody else has to be 14 again except this one asshole (me)
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is being like "I don't want this disorder" but also having the existential crisis of "but then me and my funky brain buddies wouldn't exist" and it just doesn't feel fair to (if you somehow had the choice) take their lives away
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#me when i think about healing#sorry ik healing is different for everyone i just know that ill kinda be bummed to lose some of these alters down the road#they've helped take care of me when i couldn't do the bare minimum myself#as much as i feel like a stranger in my own body sometimes they do too and yet they do their best#so even if i heal and i cant stop who goes away and when#i'll appreciate them while hoping someday healing will feel less like the end of the world and more like a new beginning
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System culture is...
System culture is being told to "not treat alters like other people" or "your alters are just parts of you not other people" but ima refer to them as other people and say there other people anyways because they are to me!! :3
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#people are too fixated on how others expect them to handle or experience the disorder when in reality if it's your experience#it's your experience!#i treat all of us as different people who have been drawn from me and my memories but split off into their own things#because a lot of them have different opinions or feelings on things#like i might not be too big on the people they talk to#but they're over the moon to talk to them when they're in front#we're all apples from the same tree#yeah the source is the same but not every apple from it is
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