undeadandunderpayed

[undeadandunderpayed]

thank you for saying it! scare clowns are not evil. i've had spindle his whole life and he's never been aggressive. he growls at religious symbols on tuesdays but that's normal for a horror clown.

here, have a picture of spindle playing nice with my mime(dusty) and jester(tizzy) clownlings. they love them. (even if spindle has mistaken dusty for a baby scare and keeps trying to share their meat with them.)

Scary clown misinformation

Ok so I think we've all noticed by now that out of all the clowns groups and breeds one seems to have significantly more misinformation about them floating around, that being the humble Scary Clown. This can not stand, we believe that all clowns deserve the proper love and respect. And if I may get a bit personal with you my dear reader, this is a topic near and dear to my heart. My family has raised Scare Clowns and the lesser know Spooky Clown (both of which fall under the Scary Clown umbrella) since before we came to America. At least seven generations of my ancestors were responsible for keeping those breeds alive and if family legend is to be believed we may have been one of the original creators of the Scare Clown as a breed. I was born loving scary clowns and I will pass away loving them. Now please let me dispell some rumors, misconceptions and straight up lies about our friends the Scary Clown.

First of all and this is really important. SCARY CLOWN IS NOT IT'S OWN BREED!!! The term Scary Clown refers to a group of clown breeds like how dog breeds can be classed as Sporting and Non-Sporting. Well all scary clowns do have a common ancestor (that being the now extinct Eastern European Jester) they are all now completely separate breeds, each with their own personality and care requirements.

Second of all, for the love of everything Scary Clowns are not naturally aggressive. This is incredibly important so remember it for me ok? If you see a clown of the Scary class being aggressive it is either because you are too close to their nest or they have a bad owner. Horror movies really gave my buddies a horrible reputation.

Scary Clowns are not all loners!!! Some are like the Norwegian Axe-Thrower but most aren't! Please do your research if you plan on getting a Scary, they are really sweet and really loyal but please do your research!

Scary Clowns were breed to be guard clowns and not fighting clowns. Infact the practice of clown fighting didn't even start until the 1950s long after scary clowns entered the picture.

Not really a misconception but I do feel the need to put this at the end of the post. When you're going to haunted houses this coming Halloween please remember to not hurt the Scare Clowns. That goes for the human workers as well of course! Unhappy humans mean unhappy clowns and unhappy clowns mean unhappy humans. Just be respectful people it's not that hard.

Now that's all for now! We hope you've learned something new about the wonderful world of Scary Clowns.

-Admin Hazard

[undeadandunderpayed]

sadly, there's still a lot of breed bias out in the world. i've never had a rodeo before but i do have a horror clown named spindle who is the sweetest clown you'll ever meet.(unless you're easily startled, i guess. they like jumpscares.) spindle's never hurt or even gotten snappy with my jester or mime clownlings, despite how energetic and prone to climbing on him they are, but people freak out anyway. one bad stereotype can turn people away from an entire breed when the problem with the aggressive ones are normally the owners, not the clowns themselves. i'd suggest looking into parks that are known for being rodeo friendly. even better; if they're horror or evil friendly, then they'll be open to basically every breed at that point.

I don’t know why other clown owners are harassing me and Honks when we go to the clown park. They say it’s because Rodeos tend to ‘play to rough’ with other clowns, but Honks is the absolute sweetest.

[undeadandunderpayed]

don't do it.

i was promised a fun, sexy, immortal life of wealth and luxury and instead i'm coming home from my minimum wage graveyard shift at burrito chime only to clean up more clown puke because dusty won't stop eating tizzy's crayons.

vampirism is a pyramid scheme and, no matter how long i live, this economy refuses to let me amass the large amounts of wealth i was promised.

sorry can’t talk i’m too busy romanticizing vampirism

[undeadandunderpayed]

we are always learning. try going to a circus instead. (local, not a big commercialized one.) you won't see every type of clown there but the performer types tend to be well treated well and obviously enjoy performing there.

I want to go to a clown zoo

It's like a normal zoo, but every exhibit has different types of clowns in it

No other types of animals. Only clowns. And similar species like mimes, jesters, and prop comedians.

[undeadandunderpayed]

what about tired, underpayed, and raising 3 clowns?

i don't understand why people keep trying to create binaries like the "sexy vampire" vs "scary vampires". I think vampires are at their best when they're both of those. Sexy and scary are not opposites lol.

[undeadandunderpayed]

oh, finally!

this is great, good on japan for this.

i'd love to get artificial blood instead of relying on the blood bank or paying questionable donors but, of course, you know this means it's going to cost a fortune that i am sadly not quite old enough to have developed yet.

[undeadandunderpayed]

oh, by the gods, i know... the last time i let myself get dragged to the clown zoo by a friend i had to leave when i saw one of the handlers giving laffy taffy to one of the horror clowns. concentrated sugars aren't good for them! they need raw meat!

I want to go to a clown zoo

It's like a normal zoo, but every exhibit has different types of clowns in it

No other types of animals. Only clowns. And similar species like mimes, jesters, and prop comedians.

[undeadandunderpayed]

hey, clown husbandry blogs

i’ve got a bit of a situation and i was hoping someone more experienced might have advice.

i have a horror clown named spindle. they’re well-trained, fully adult, had them since they were born. great temperament, good with doorbells, only growls at religious symbols on tuesdays.

a few months ago, i took in two shelter clownlings—one mime breed (dusty) and one jester (tizzy).

they’re both very young. i think they were imprinting, and spindle kind of… took them under their wing? they play together, they nap together, and i thought everything was fine until i realized:

spindle has apparently decided dusty is a baby horror clown.

now they keep trying to feed dusty raw meat and “teach” them how to hunt the neighbor’s garden gnome.

dusty is a mime.

dusty flushes the meat.

i have no idea what to do. spindle looks so proud when they leave a “treat,” and dusty always does a little thank-you pantomime before running off to the bathroom.

this has been going on for two weeks.

should i intervene? or just… let this play out?? i don’t want to hurt their bond but also i’ve had to call the plumber twice and i think the pipes are haunted now.

any advice would be appreciated.

and, if any of you were worried about the normally solitary mime breed being housed with a jester and a horror clown, here is a picture of them playing so you can see that dusty is perfectly happy and relaxed while playing with them.

yes, i am aware that spindle dresses pretty brightly for his particular horror breed, and that tizzy has more black accents than people expect from a jester... but they like matching and what kind of clown dad would i be if i didn't let them bond.

- marceau 🩸 (burrito chime graveyard shift, clown dad in distress)