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TAKE THIS FREAK, FOR YOU ON YOUR PC! (WHAT) FOR THE SOLID PRICE OF [0 usd] (WHAT??) HE IS [Free of All Charges] ITS SO GOOD I MIGHT [Die]

HERE!! ON VGEN <- CLICK THERE FOR TENNA (FOR FREE)

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was talking to a coworker and realised i could not for the life of me remember his name but i was too embarrassed to ask because we've spoken multiple times so mid-conversation i started concocting a plan to nudge the conversation towards the ID photos on our building passes so that i could be like oh my ID photo is awful haha the camera they use to take these has a real talent for making me look as unphotogenic as possible and then he would say oh yes me too haha everyone says that (because they do) and then i would be able to say well let me see yours it can't be as bad as mine! and he would show me his ID because we are coworkers and why wouldn't he and this would allow me to see his building pass which of course would have his name on it and then i would be able to say well yours is perfectly nice it must be me that's the problem! and then we would have a polite chuckle about it and i would have his name without needing to ask for it and he would be none the wiser and all would be well but then before i could execute this fine plan a little voice in my head went "so this is some light yagami bull shit you are about to pull" which was such a violent reality check it shocked me completely out of my embarrassment and i went "hey im so sorry your name has slipped my mind could you remind me" and he did and it was fine.

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We go forward.

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not a day goes by that i do not think about the sims 3’s disgusting moodlet icons

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im back in action guys

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years after the inconclusive FDA outbreak investigation #1064 ("dry cereal") from 2022, with over 550 fucking adverse effects reported (WHICH IS A LOT!), and the LARGEST influx of reports iwaspoisoned had ever seen, people are still reporting mystery gut issues, sometimes excruciatingly painful, after eating lucky charms and cheerios. this is not limited to one or a few flavors, I have seen this across a bunch of different flavors and varieties of both.

there has never been a recall about this. there has never been a cause found. the investigation was closed without figuring out what the fuck is making people sick. lucky charms is blatantly aimed at kids, and cheerios spent decades making a name for itself as 'healthy' and 'safe' for people with major medical issues.

anecdotally since 2022 I have spoken to a lot of people who either had their kid's mystery gut issues clear up after their kids stopped eating those cereals, or had their own mystery gut issues clear up after they stopped eating the cereals themselves. and yes, this includes people without a gluten sensitivity.

if you eat any flavors of lucky charms or cheerios, and you have any kind of mystery gut issues going on, please try avoiding the cereals for a week or few and see if anything improves or clears up.

and yeah, I am never eating ANY lucky charms or cheerios again. they KNOW their cereals are making people sick. they just hope everyone forgot.

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I've been doing a lot of thinking about my family and how I was treated as a child, and honestly, my father has never seemed more amazing in my eyes.

I used to love Luigi(Mario's brother) when I was little. Like, he was my favorite character ever, and I had multiple plushies of him. Didn't give a fuck about Mario, vaguely tolerated Peach, but I loved Luigi.

On my first day of kindergarten, my dad gave me the number for his work phone and said it was Luigi's phone number. "If anything happens at school, call Luigi."And not even twenty minutes into my first day, I was having a panic attack. So I went down to the principal's office and called "Luigi."

Now, at the time, my father was in a meeting with his manager and his supervisor, along with most of his coworkers. And when I called, he picked up before he even left the room.

And he put on a very awful Italian accent and said, "Itsa me, Luigi! Whatsa the matter?"In front of his boss and coworkers. Without telling them what was going on. So they were absolutely bewildered, and he carried on like they didn't even exist. He only explained what was happening after I had calmed down and hung up, to which most of them responded with "Aww, cute."

I continued to call him whenever I got upset at school, and eventually his coworkers got in on it. I distinctly remember one of them impersonating Toad. I don't know why I'm telling you this, I just thought it might make you smile :)

this is so delightful I love your Luigi dad

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the purpose of friends is to have people who unconditionally hate your shitty exes & relatives. like maybe YOU have a complex relationship with your father but i sure don't. i'm outside his house with a gun. he's not the unforgivable asshole who raised me he's just an unforgivable asshole

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these are KILLING me

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Caterpillar

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Sometimes it does feel weird talking about NSFW bans because you either see it discussed in the sense of "NSFW bans are bad because the systems just randomly shoot innocent queer people!" or "The NSFW was bad (supposedly) but all the weirdos who jacked off to porn went away so things are nicer now" and its like

man that's great meanwhile I don't think Mastercard should decide if I pay someone to draw Cynthia from Pokemon being brainwashed or not.

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