unxannyrewrites-blog

[unxannyrewrites-blog]

Once again, all completed issues of Full-New X-Men are now available in .cbr format at the following link: www.zippyshare.com/UnxannyRewrites. You can also find individual download links in the blog section labeled “Issue list”.

Full-New X-Men is a work of parody, and all its characters are © Marvel Entertainment, LLC. Please support the original creators and your local bookstore.

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Looks like someone got that Lady Mastermind fashion memo!

So! That’s it for issue 9, and for our posting schedule for the time being. We’ll be back with an unbroken post streak once issues 10-14 are in the can, which hopefully won’t take too long!

All characters are © Marvel Entertainment, LLC. Please support the official release.

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The boys at the X-Mansion sure pick the most incospicuous times of day to rummage through refrigerators while looking baked as hell(ion).

All characters are © Marvel Entertainment, LLC. Please support the official release.

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King Pigeon is the monarch we deserve: a principled leader with a clear sense of his responsibilities. Where’s his feature film, I ask? When will the industry finally give POC (pigeons or culvers) some long-earned representation?

All characters are © Marvel Entertainment, LLC. Please support the official release.

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Let’s be serious for a second here, Hank: what are the chances that “playing online Battleship with no pants on” isn’t just a euphemism for “beating it to Kantai Collection”?

All characters are © Marvel Entertainment, LLC. Please support the official release.

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You know what they say: “You don’t have to die to work here, but it helps!”

All characters are © Marvel Entertainment, LLC. Please support the official release.

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God damn that Mystique! Don’t get hit by her Power Cosmic!

All characters are © Marvel Entertainment, LLC. Please support the official release.

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Guys. Guys. It’s your boy Kenneth back with some commentary! You’re in for a ride.

All characters are © Marvel Entertainment, LLC. Please support the official release.

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Boy, that cold sure did take a while to recover from! Hoo-boy! Fit as a fiddle, and ready to resume regular updates now that that one and only obstacle to the regular daily grind is behind us!

Actually, there's a falsehood or two embedded in there, and addressing the more substantive one is necessary to understand our new approach (or rather, our old approach!) going forward.

Before we put even the first page of this re-write online, the entire first story arc of five issues was already done, and we'd spent a couple of happy months hashing out all of the details and all of the jokes, polishing it to a diamond-like finish before we were confident enough to put it out there. Over the course of the next couple of months, as those pages were going up at a rate of one page per day, we gradually got the next little story sorted out as well.

But eventually, the rate of updates outpaced the rate of production, and we hit a point where I was having to write one new page per day just to hit the deadline. This presented two unsurmountable problems:

The joyful hobby became a chore, which sapped a lot of enthusiasm and energy from the process.

The ability to put that same sort of forethought and polish we'd employed in the first two stories became impossible, since we were literally plugging away at a rate of one page per day without a super-clear idea of where we were going aside from a bunch of broad ideas and goals.

Then I came down with a serious case of bacterial bronchitis and was just too wiped out to be creative for a few weeks. At that point, with the habit of writing broken, there was only the sense of the burden of obligation left, and that was, for a time, insufficient to lure me back.

But the memory of those happy months working on the first story arc and a desire to see things through lingered. And so we made this set of decisions: First, we'd finish up the current issue (issue #9), and once it was done, put it online so it wouldn't eternally be the incomplete work that it currently, embarrassingly is. And second, we'd then go back to completing entire story arcs before putting even a single page of them online.

What does that mean for you, the reader? Glad you theoretically asked! We're going to mostly go silent again for the next month or two as we hammer out the remaining issues (#10 through 14) of this story arc, and when it's finished in its perfect form, you'll get daily updates for the next 120 days in a row or thereabouts.

During that time, we'll get to work on the next doozy of a story arc, which is... a doozy. Clocking in at 14 issues, it would be an absurdly long wait to stick to this rule in a hidebound way, so we'll likely do it in two sets of seven issues. With a little luck, there should be little delay between these, but who knows. Rather than sacrificing quality for punctuality, you'll get it when it's perfect, which I'm sure that history will thank us for.

So! Enjoy the next week or so of updates, and keep an eye on things for the next four-or-so-month bout of daily updates when they begin at some point in the foreseeable future!

-William

[unxannyrewrites-blog]

Well, it had to happen sooner or later.

After four-and-a-half months of uninterrupted daily updates – and having coincidentally reached the bottom of our backlog of finished pages – we now have to go offline for a couple days, both to shake off a nasty flu (yes, we both got it and we don’t even live on the same continent) and replenish our cache.

Thanks to every last one of you for following us so far, and we promise to come back from this ordeal stronger and manlier than ever before.

[unxannyrewrites-blog]

What’s that you’re smelling there, Victor? Don’t keep it to yourself!

All characters are © Marvel Entertainment, LLC. Please support the official release.

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You heard it here first, folks. Look forward to the soon-to-be-announced X-Men: Apocalypse sequel, starring Jared Leto.

All characters are © Marvel Entertainment, LLC. Please support the official release.

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Wait, I got sorted into Warrenclaw?! Bummer.

Sorry about the delayed update, folks! We hit a slight snag along the road, but we’re back on track for the next couple days at least.

All characters are © Marvel Entertainment, LLC. Please support the official release.

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Kitty’s backside is her actual power. Intangibility is just a secondary mutation to protect it from all the grabbing.

All characters are © Marvel Entertainment, LLC. Please support the official release.

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It does sound like a killer smartphone game, though.

All characters are © Marvel Entertainment, LLC. Please support the official release.

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Oof. So close and yet so far, Bobby.

All characters are © Marvel Entertainment, LLC. Please support the official release.

[unxannyrewrites-blog]

Pssh. Everyone knows Hagrid X Buckbeak is where it’s at.

All characters are © Marvel Entertainment, LLC. Please support the official release.