vampirerex

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thinking about noah’s nameless wife takes inventory

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My sister got a new kitten and it immediately decided to loaf on a watermelon and bless us with this picture.

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obsessed with this

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why is bass so expensiveeeeee

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My oven has given up and is just giving me bullshit times

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As a kid, I was really upset that Bill Watterson wouldn't license Calvin & Hobbes so I could have plushies or so there would be a Saturday morning cartoon. Now, I realize his resistance is the reason we don't have a Calvin & Hobbes DreamWorks movie starring Chris Pratt.

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Anyone wanna lock weapons with me in battle in such a way that we cannot be separated despite our burning hatred for one another, only to be anthropomorphised as holding hands forever

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MCR SOUTH AMERICA TOUR JUST ANNOUNCED OMG!!!

Good luck getting tickets!!

If I remember correctly this’ll b their first time there since the initial black parade tour!

[vampirerex]

The next Tumblr addition should be the ability to set traps for mutuals. Like you mark a post as being a trap for so-and-so, and when they reblog they get a little pop up of a box propped up with a stick falling and the words "Haha! @phaeton-flier knew you would reblog that!"

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Correct me if I'm wrong, but it's my understanding that in the criminal underworld, only two things are really widely known about Parker:

Parker is insane

Parker is a world-famous thief—the Parker

No one really knows what she looks like, who she works for, or even that she is a she.

So may I suggest "The 101 Parkers Job":

There's a global job so huge and so important that it behooves the Leverage crew to split up and convince many, many marks that the person they're dealing with is the Parker. Obviously, Parker can only be in place at a time, so this includes the usual suspects—Eliot, Hardison, Sophie, Harry, and Breanna—plus lots of members of Leverage International as well as some surprise faces, including Maggie, Quinn, McSweeten, Tara, and Sterling (and that's just the tip of the iceberg), all pretending to be Parker. For one glorious episode, they are all Parker, embodying all of the weirdness and skill that entails to the best of their abilities, guided by comms in the most chaotic job possible.

[vampirerex]

Sometimes a family can just be an automobile & a moth

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This arcane ritual with which we aim to gain the attention of those strangest beings, those unknowable gods of the outermost dark whose tears are the stars and whose laughter is silence itself, probably could have been an email.

[vampirerex]

cutely emits a single ping