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Gideon protects!

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some older tlt things

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got a dead man chillin in a costume/got a dead man chillin in a box

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knight gideon sketch/warmup

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So last month I got hit by a car and died right. Which I didn't initially realize until I watched some guy haul my body into his pickup and drive off. Which, being that it's deep in rural Michigan, I assume means my body will make some venison jerky and maybe some wall decoration, and I'll be resigned to being one of hundreds of deer ghosts floating around Saginaw, which is w/e. But then I find out the guy works at a taxidermy shop or something, and he's actually pretty good at stuffing and mounting deer carcasses, which I come to find out when I find myself face to face with my old body in the shop window. So naturally, I figure since ghosts need to possess something to interact with the living world and etc etc etc the most logical thing to do is to possess my own body, since it's basically a statue of myself. And a little surprisingly, it actually fits like a glove. Like, since it's my body, it feels like stepping right back into place. So I get out of town and back to my herd, eventually. And that's where the trouble starts coming into it, because after I get settled again, I don't know how to explain to everyone else what feels so weird. Like since I can move my body and do everything I used to do, it's functionally the same, like nothing happened. Or it SHOULD be, so I don't know how to explain how it's NOT. But it's just hard to explain it to someone who's never been hit by a truck I guess

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relistening to Nona and god i cant stop thinking about alecto. The one thing nona is good at is people. she loves people. she cant read, she hates food, she doesnt like that she has hands, she eats pencils but she can know people better than any person ever could. she can tell camilla and palamades apart immediately. she knows pash by the way she moves her bones. she knows every language if she can just see it spoken and she knew kiriona was the saddest girl in the world by sight. alecto never knew how to act human, was never meant to have a body, but when shes nona all she knows is humanity. going insane.

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Something I think people don't acknowledge or appreciate enough about Paul is that they existed before their full official birth. They were test run temporarily. In (chapter) 9, in the beach flashback, Camilla becomes Camilla-and-Palamedes, not quite with Paul's eyes but with one of Cam's and one of Pal's, and Nona recognizes them as a new person who smiles at her with a new person's smile.

Afterward, Camilla-and-Palamedes return to being Camilla separated from Palamedes. This happened at least once, but despite the horrific toll it takes on Camilla's body after the fact, the way Pyrrha yells at them at times also implies this happened a more than once.

Now please consider that alongside Camilla crying with absolute relief. Camilla who knows what it feels like to be Paul, or at least a proto version of Paul, and so deeply enthusiastically proclaims, "Palamedes, yes. My whole life, yes. Yes, forever, yes. Life is too short and love is too long." Camilla who has addressed him by name on-screen exactly once before this moment (as a child in Doctor Sex, when they finally dropped all professional airs and let themselves be stupid kids laughing until it hurt) breaking that out here of all places. Palamedes who has suffered so much guilt about the burden she's taken on in his name, knowing full well she wouldn't stop even if he begged her to, who also knows what if feels like to be Paul and how much they can do when they're like that. Camilla and Palamedes who understand that accessing that power in half measures will also kill them both, but in a way that makes them useless to everyone else they love, and without doing so at all they can be of very little use, but going all in will make them a nearly unstoppable asset.

Would you truly tell me you would have rather had them suffer being forever divided by a matter of seconds? "Love and freedom don't coexist" but Paul is the closest thing they will ever have to it. Is your attachment to who they were worth hating who they've become, even knowing that they made this decision fully informed, having tested it and decided together it's what they both wanted more than anything in the world?

You can miss them and still be happy for them. You can be sad that they're no longer the same and still recognize the beauty and triumph in what they've become. If you loved Camilla and you loved Palamedes, how can you not love Paul? Would you really look at them of all characters and proclaim without irony that you're taking your love away?

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Twitter really liked this one so I’ll put it here as well, here’s my Kiriona design! :D

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God's victory and death was a girl

(1/13)

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Gideon is an unreliable narrator not in the sense that she lies to the reader, but in that she reshapes or obscures her own memories to reinforce her perceptions of herself and especially of Harrow. Like how she maintains the vague impression that she duels Harrow constantly, always just barely missing her shot at an offworld shuttle, but also insists that she’s never hit Harrow before, because if she had then she wouldn’t have been able to stop.

Perhaps she means this in the context of never having sucker-punched Harrow or fought dirty. Whatever violence she has administered has to be noble and justified but also almost chivalrously constrained, the bloody details politely brushed aside, because in her own eyes Gideon has to be the unabashed hero but she also has to convince herself that’s why she’s never really won. She has to believe she would have gotten out of here by now if she was willing to actually really hurt Harrow. And she absolutely cannot explore why she’s never been able to take that fatal step. It’s only once she sees Harrow from the inside that she can admit that their mutual suffering led them to inflict suffering on each other.

The payoff to all this, of course, is the reveal she knocked a ten-year-old Harrow on her ass hard enough that Harrow clawing herself free fundamentally advanced the plot narrative.

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I am a huge fan of retiring to my quarters

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I'm slowly chipping away at my reread of TLT... And the same thing strikes me in the early acts of gtn.

Gideon can hardly go a paragraph without mentioning Harrow in some way.

Gideon immediately ditches the hating hero mentality the instant she thinks ber necromancer might be in danger.

And! A newer thought for my musings... Harrow, the most secretive bitch in Canaan house, the one who covertly mapped every single door she could reach, the one who told her Cavalier to fuck off and leave her alone so she could do her work, the one who trusts no one; and most importantly, the bitch who completely fucking hates Gideon no offense...

Immediately starts sharing info with Gideon after danger threatens them both.

These girls have been in love the whole time. We all knew this from the word go, I just have more empirical evidence to prove it now.

I miss them, ladies. I miss them so much.

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PERFUMES I THINK WOULD LOCK THIS TOMB

I love tlt and I love perfume, thus, this was born: scents i think tlt characters would wear or own. Sources: I have a perfume hyperfixation, a spreadsheet, and a dream

Judith - clean, linen, citrus, very close to the skin and inoffensive. Almost boring, but there’s some green notes there, maybe some tea or herbs. Green Tea by Elizabeth Arden, Naturelle by Yves Rocher, Un Jardin Apres la Mousson by Hermes

Marta - Basic Women’s Scent. Has not changed it since she started wearing perfume, wears the same thing every day without fail. May opt for an EDT instead of parfum bc it’s cheaper. Daisy by Marc Jacobs, Chance by Chanel, Idole by Lancome

Coronabeth - gourmand ICON she is a vanilla coconut amber queen. sweet, warm, almost nutty in some cases. Likes to layer perfumes, and alternates between them for the seasons. has a massive collection and tends to blind buy and gift perfumes that she wasn't a fan of. Heaven of Coconut by Clair de Lune, Tobacco Vanille by Tom Ford, Eden Amber by Claudio Zucca Parfums

Ianthe - either wears exclusively weird ass niche scents to be disorienting and unsettling OR wears the most expensive stuff she can find even if she doesn’t like the smell herself. Genuinely does like oriental scents and more unisex leaning masculine scents. Toscovat' apologist. Inexcusable Evil or Age of Innocence by Toscovat', Secretions Magnifiques by Etat Libre d'Orange, that insane 250k $ Clive Christian No. 1 Imperial Majesty Perfume (normal ianthe choices if she were actually wanting to like how she smelled would be black orchid by tom ford or memoire d'une odeur by gucci)

Babs - almost as big of a collection as coronabeth and dulcie, matches scents to lewks, really snobbish about brand names but lowkey has great taste. Probably was gifted a scentbird subscription from one of the twins and renewed it himself because he liked it so much. A Nocturnal Whisper by Gucci, Gentleman Society by Givenchy, Le Male Elixir by Jean Paul Gaultier

Isaac - Baby's first cologne. Went to Necromancer CVS with Jeannemary and Magnus and they both picked out something they thought made them smell grown up. He likes really green scents, very classic. He wants to smell like Magnus (noooo magnus don't buy me one of your favorites) but does not know how much or where to wear it, and definitely smells a little bit like bad body spray. Apollo by AXE, Nautica Voyage by Nautica, Tommy by Tommy Hillfiger

Jeannemary - Loves a gourmand and fruity scent, went full Pink Sugar, Hot Topic blackheart brand. Both she and Isaac got cheaper ones, I'm thinking bath and body works sprays, they're terrible teen mall goths what more do you expect. Blackcurrant Vanilla by Bath and Body Works, Muertos by Blackheart, Chérie by Kate Spade

Abigail - VERY CLASSY, old money and old ass perfume for the vibes. Also likes a gourmand but mixed with musk and florals , collects old bottles and wears them, so sorta smells like a grandma. I love her your honor, so she's getting some scents from my personal collection. Florence by Tocca, Honeysuckle and Davana by Jo Malone, Joy by Jean Patou

Magnus - this bitch LOVES a warm wood. Sandalwood and cedar. Put some bay rum on this man. He is very classic dad cologne to me. smells like pipe smoke and shaving cream, very warm, very cozy, very good for hugs. Time Machine by Le Frag, Acqua di Gio by Giorgio Armani, Polo by Ralph Lauren (could also wear Polo Supreme Leather by Ralph Lauren)

Camilla - doesn’t wear perfume often BUT likes skin scents, very inoffensive, just smells GOOD. Likes an amber and a woody musk. Leans more unisex but can be tempted with a soft soft SOFT floral, probably steals it from her sister. Not a perfume by Juliet has a gun, You by Glossier, The Matcha 26 by Le Labo

Palamedes - steals Cams so often she bought him his own. Loves an amber but leans more woody and musky, unisex king. I think he is intrigued by niche brands and interesting scents but he doesn't buy them. Does have Cam stop to smell samplers with him at Necrophora though. Musc Ravageur by Frédéric Malle, Cloudland by Fulton & Roark, Velvet- by Commodity

Dulcinea - FLORAL. She loves a white floral, but there’s definitely an underlying note. Powdery but sharp and metallic almost. Usually goes for a rose or iris, also smells kinda old lady. She and Abigail have similar tastes with florals, but she leans more powdery and fruity where Abigail leans more vanilla and musk. Dulcie also gets some from my personal collection. The Favourite by Penhaligon's, Alien by Mugler, Flowerhead by Byredo

Pro - Old Spice Classic. Irish spring. this one was easy for me, I don't think he really wears any specific fragrance but he uses heavily fragranced soaps and it does carry over.

Silas - plain soap, perfume is not of the Lord ™️

Colum - plain soap, perfume is not of the Silas

Harrow - Does Not Like Most Scents, probably doesn’t wear perfumes and is VERY offended by strong sillage. If she were to wear one, she would be tempted by anything that’s incense and floral, but sprays it in the air and wafts it on her instead of putting it on the skin directly. Nosferatu by Heretic, Thurible by Rook Perfumes, Gossamer Spirit by Universal Flowering

Gideon - Nav smells like lye soap and Cheap Cologne, this girl is wearing fucking Old Spice Swagger, Drakkar Noir, and Curve Black. Kiriona switches it up to Bleeker Street by Bond No. 9, Karl Vienna Opera by Karl Lagerfeld, or Green Irish Tweed by Creed

BONUS ROUND

John- lemon and aquatic scents, probably basic tbh. unfortunately,,, these are classic scents for a reason, they do actually smell good but I refuse to say jod has good taste, so mercy or augustine bought them for him. Just Bleu by Alta Moda, Neo-Animism by Mami Wata, 50/50 by Emper

Mercy - oriental florals, she is Very Particular, and has a wild taste that somehow WORKS I immediately picked Lolita Lempika by Lolita Lempika for her. Wack licorice, cherry, and ivy. Also Wanted Girl by Azzaro and Signature by Montblanc.

Augustine - shaving soap scents, clean citrus, very alcoholic based and cedar. Juniper Sling or The Blazing Mr. Sam both by Penhaligon's

G1deon - friend said that OGideon would wear Pyrrha's go to scent to feel closer to her, so thanks templar you made me cry :)

Pyrrha- unisex but specifically woody and leather. Sérénade by Vertus, Pepper Wood by ETIKK Fragrances, 100% Passion Man by Abercrombie & Fitch

Nona - FRUITY and sweet. Pink Sugar by Aquolina, Fantasy by Britney Spears, and Hippie Chic by True Religion

Alecto - water scents, sweet but unsettling, weird notes, but more cohesive than Ianthe. This is so fun for me, so a lot of these are perfumes that I REALLY want to smell, and are just weird. Dead Dinosaur by Snif, Slice Society layered with Soda Snob both by Snif, Spectral Doorway by DS&Durga, Warm Bulb by Clue Perfumery, C4R4C4S NIGHT by D4C, Wet Stone by Amouroud

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gideon nav is such A Character. perhaps the most character ever. she's a mama's girl without a mother. she's a loyal knight without anything worth swearing her loyalty to. she's been dreaming of the frontlines since she was nine years old. she plays at being gruff and unconcerned but it's game over the second someone appears even the slightest bit vulnerable. her crush on an evil cougar almost killed her. she has horrible acne. she's the kindest person you'll ever meet and also such a dick. she's a butch lesbian. she's chivalry's stubborn pulse. she's a meatheaded jock filling in last-minute at an international science competition and she could NOT be less concerned about it. the girl who tortured her in a bunker for 17 years asked politely to torture her further one (1) time and she immediately said "yes." that same girl revealed her tragic backstory and gideon's first instinct was to baptize her and give her a little kissy on the forehead. she's the saddest girl in the world. she's a shambling corpse and maybe she has been the whole time. she's an albatross. she's lit up red and gold, a candle in the cold and dark. she's named after her mother's murderer, because everyone simply assumed she was screaming for the baby. she's a walking memento mori. she's never had a salad before. and she is also, i cannot stress this enough, quite literally jesus.

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i can’t believe tamsyn muir fucking said this. i can’t believe how right she is. i want to take her out for tacos and have an emotional affair with her that ruins me for all other dinner partners.

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I know we talk about how John takes away the personhood of his disciples by renaming them, but - I do wonder if it isn't an inherent part of the resurrrection process. The first time he speaks Ulysses' and Titania's names out loud is also the first time he moves them. Gideon needs her soul to be reattached to her body, and she wakes up as Kiriona.

Names have power. We know this. John has been careful not to spill a single drop of blood in the last myriad. He has also, crucially, changed his last name. Arithmonyms are as unique to their bearers as their first names. The lyctors keep their first anmes private from an anyone but each other, and have all but forgotten their last names. The mere mention of the name Alecto makes John flinch, and Nona shatters her middle thoughts.

Abigail for my mothers. Pent for my people. Step two: analyse the soul. Understand its structure, its shape. Three syllables you did not even understand.

And Isis said unto Ra, "O my divine father, tell me thy name, for he who is able to pronounce his name liveth."

I wonder if Pyrrha remembers John's old name.

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they would totally start a podcast