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Hello?

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best friend: [appears in my field of vision]

me [inside]: my favorite human has arrived. They are cute and smart and my favorite. I must greet them in a manner indicative of my appreciation for their existence.

me: hey nerd

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Do u ever just REALLY love someone in the most platonic way ever? Like u just wanna buy em cookies and watch movies together and just make them as happy as they can be? Because just knowing they are happy makes you really happy?

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verdades secretas (2015)

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Paolo Sebastian Haute Couture F/W 2014.

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just woke up still fascinated @ that buttplug.

@lonestarlings

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Write me a poem based on our muse’s relationship.

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REBLOG IF YOU ARE HELLA BORED AND WOULDN’T MIND SOME CURIOUS ANONS.

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unbreakable kimmy schmidt starter sentences.

❛   we’re not garbage, we’re human beings !  ❜ ❛   i’m pretty but tough like a diamond. or beef jerky in a ball gown.  ❜ ❛   this isn’t the chinatown bus you can’t just choke someone who’s sleeping !  ❜ ❛   straight guys can be vegetarians. hitler was a vegetarian.  ❜ ❛   is that a dolphin with a bow on it ?  ❜ ❛   i’m having candy for dinner !  ❜ ❛   look at yourself, girlfrienemy.  ❜ ❛   but i survived, because that’s what women do.  ❜ ❛   i’ll be here … with my kissing hole.   ❜ ❛   can’t the world be my noodles and butter ?  ❜ ❛   so far all i’ve learned is that the olsen twins are actually four people.  ❜ ❛   that was like listening to a mirror !   ❜ ❛   i trusted you, tv. you’ve seen me naked.  ❜ ❛   high heels were invented by a man, kimmy, because no woman ever invented anything.  ❜ ❛   i’m a drug lookout and a process server. that way, when business is bad, business is good.   ❜ ❛  come on, spirit gum. if you can keep obama’s human mask on over his lizard face, hashtag lizard truth, surely you can do this.  ❜ ❛  i know how sarcasm works !  ❜ ❛  what is up, society ?  ❜ ❛  delivering chinese food all day can be depressing. like, when people yell out ‘ food’s here !  ’ as if they have a family, but i know they are alone.  ❜ ❛  barbie shoes aren’t weird !  ❜ ❛  but i already did something today !  ❜ ❛  1996 called. it wants its clothes back.  ❜ ❛  2090 called. you’re dead and you wasted your time on earth.  ❜ ❛  age doesn’t matter ! you can die at any time !  ❜ ❛  i’ll keep the crowd away like a greenpeace volunteer.   ❜ ❛  i still believe the world is good, that bunnies are nice, and snakes are mean, and that one day sandra bullock will find someone who deserves her.  ❜ ❛  you’re kind, and you’re funny, and both of our names mean penis.  ❜ ❛  this is gettin’ a real thelma and louise vibe … i like it.   ❜ ❛  i was trying to have fun and then i made everything weird ‘cause i’m weird.  ❜ ❛  [ they’re ] gay as a penguin.  ❜ ❛  be you. be what you want. and then become unbreakable.   ❜ ❛  it’s a photo of a man’s penis. i read that people text them to each other.  ❜ ❛  my parents are blimping into town tomorrow.   ❜ ❛  somebody needs to put food on my barbie themed tv trays !  ❜ ❛  your experiences are not universal !  ❜ ❛  the last time i had two men fighting over me i was a table at a fire island wrestling match.  ❜ ❛  what white nonsense is this ?  ❜ ❛  i’m not running a charity here, except the one where i donate my old towels to poor people with the same initials as me.  ❜

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{Christine after sleeping with Henry for first time.}

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“How can I ever explain everything to her?” She whispered, reality darkening Christine’s sweet gesture. “How are we to explain my presence in her life? And how do I tell her about her father without telling her…everything?”

Christine had not thought about how she would potentially explain their complicated situation.

“I-” she paused waiting for an idea. There was another jolt in her abdomen and somehow she knew what to say. “you can say her Papa was a very smart man who tried to help people but he became very very ill in the process,” The thought of that ‘illness’ brought tears to her eyes which she quickly brushed away to avoid upsetting Emma. “and we both loved him very much but there was nothing we could do to help him.” She couldn’t go on without breaking down; she buried her head in Emma’s bosom to hide her own tears.

Christmas Eve

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*Literal meaning: ​To not know which foot to dance​ on​​.

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Reblog this if your posts don't have expiration dates.

run-run-rabbit-run:

So that your followers know it’s okay to dig through your blog and send in memes, starters, or responses to opens days, weeks, or months after they’ve been first posted.