wetfornamjoon - Tumblr blog

wetfornamjoon · 4 years ago

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proof of life

Pairing: Jeon Jeongguk x Kim Taehyung

Synopsis: Taehyung looks back at how he made it to this point.

Word Count: 27k

Warnings: Threats of rape/non con to instill fear, shower sex, emotional/psychological abuse

Request: taehyung has a child from a previous relationship and is single but then meets jeongguk and they get together fall in love and jeongguk becomes the step-dad to taehyung a kid and they get married and are expecting a baby soon and some domestic stuff sprinkled in it.

A/N: As you can see in the tags, there is emotional/psychological abuse. Jeongguk is not the abuser, just to add, but it is talked about extensively through Taehyung's experience. Just a heads up in case anyone misses it in the tags and to anyone who may be triggered by the mention of it. I would love some feedback on this and to discuss this fic if anyone's interesting in getting to know the little family🥺🥺Other than that, enjoy luvs!

Taehyung always thought it was going to just be him and Yerim, and frankly, he was okay with that.

Being okay was what he was planning on settling with. Being okay with being a single mother. Being okay with living in a shabby apartment above a jokbal restaurant-it has its benefits. Being okay with being a student who barely gets any sleep and having to feed his daughter as he took notes. Being okay working a minimum wage job at a pub with too many drunk, flirty alphas while his one and gracious friend, Seokjin, watched Yerim during his eight-hour shift.

Really, he was okay with this. He didn’t need no one except for his daughter, his reason to keep going when he stumbled upon the potholes that were his new life. Whenever he was overwhelmed by his situation, all he had to do was hold her, her presence anchoring him and pushing him to keep going.

But once the years start to go by, things eventually start to change.

The park is filled with families walking around, some running on the playground, and some having picnics. The grass has been freshly cut, weeds pulled straight from the ground, and dandelions swaying in the wind. The faint scent of cherry blossoms hangs in the late afternoon air, sweet and assuring.

It’s perfect.

Around him, chatter and playful screams sound through the area. He shuffles his feet in the grass, the bright green a backdrop against his black slides. He resists the part in him that wants to takes his slides off and feels the coarse ground underneath his soles, something to bring relief to his tingling feet.

His gaze focuses on two people. Yerim, her waist-length french braid Taehyung worked on effortlessly, flows behind her, the six-year-old screaming and laughing as Jeongguk chases after her. He catches up and swoops her into his arms, a huge grin gracing his face as he tickles her ribs. He carries her over to the swings, setting her in the seat.

She waves at Taehyung when she notices him looking, him waving back and smiling.

Right now, Jeongguk is the only one who can match her level of energy and keep up with the hyper child. Taehyung was out of breath after five minutes of attempting to running after her and stood off to the side to take a quick time-out.

He winces at the sudden lurch he feels from within. He looks down at the medium curve of his middle hidden underneath his light shirt, big enough that he can’t see his own two feet now. He should be used to this since hitting the second trimester. He pats his belly, the little being inside not happy with Taehyung’s current movements waking them. The sunlight bounces off the silver surface of his ring, briefly blinding his right eye. He feels along his neck for that bite, his fingers rubbing along the slightly deep groves.

He pokes at it. Jeongguk bit him. He remembers the pain, but more keenly he remembers the satisfaction he got when Jeongguk marked him as his.

It’s real. It’s there.

With the way things were going, he didn’t think he wouldn’t have any of this. He never thought he would’ve been claimed. He never thought he would have baby number two. He never thought he would ever get married, the ring, the mating bite, and the baby bump proving otherwise.

One thing he never thought of was his children having different fathers, yet Jeongguk accepts and treats Yerim as though she was his very own.

Jeongguk pushes Yerim, the girl screaming for him to push her higher, her legs swinging in exuberance. He keeps an eye on her in case she goes too high for his comfort.

He appreciates the view, watching his little girl and husband having fun in their own world without a care.

Then a smell hits him.

He jerks his head and searches. His adrenaline spikes, his heart races viciously through his ribcage, his arms shielding his bump from the danger he senses.

Cigarettes. A cold ball of dread drops in his stomach, churning in a nausea-inducing, stomach twisting manner; fear coiling along the ridges of his spine.

He slowly spins around in his spot, trying to locate the direction the scent is coming from. It’s difficult with the families occupying the area, Taehyung looking over every alpha he comes across, their physical features, their outfits, their haircuts, the way they walk...something to identify who he thinks it is.

The omega in Taehyung seizes up, leaving him to stand defenseless in the middle of the park.

He’s just about to give up and run over to Jeongguk and grab his daughter until he finds the source of that repulsive smell. A woman stands at a nearby bus stop, taking long drags of her cigarette and exhaling long blows of the smoke into the air. She taps some of the ash off of the end of the cancerous stick, walking in the direction of the shops and restaurants.

The breath in his lungs leaves him with a heavy exhale, letting himself be comforted by the soothing motion of his hands rubbing his bump. He doubles checks the park just to be safe, the scent leaving with the woman.

He felt his senses calming down, but his omega still whines, his ears flat against his head at the sudden fright. His omega sniffs around, concerned, and needs one thing and one thing only.

His eyes dart wildly around the park for the little girl and the tall alpha, breathing harshly as he worries that he's lost sight of them. His eyes rest on them, finally, catching them at the monkey bars. Jeongguk holds Yerim by her waist as she grasps onto the bars with all her might, her brows furrowed and tongue sticking.

Yerim seems to be fine. Enjoying her playtime with her Appa. Having a happy childhood like Taehyung wants her to have.

She’s fine.

He can’t but wonder, how would Yerim be if he stayed where he was six years ago? Would she still be the happy little girl showered with love and adoration from both her parents or a little girl living in constant fear, afraid of her appa, and fearful for her mama? Taehyung whimpers.

He takes a deep breath. His hands tremble. He bunches them together, nails pressing crescents into his palms.

He had not forgotten, as much as he wishes he could, but his brain doesn’t work like that, unfortunately. His mind recollects the constant ridicule, the angry threats, the empty promises, the wretched isolation.

He’s safe. Most importantly, Yerim’s safe. He’s mated to a gentle alpha who holds Taehyung, Yerim, and the unborn baby as his highest priorities. He lives in a beautiful, comfy home near the Han River. He just had a showing of his paintings at the Art Sonje Center. He has the best friends he could ever ask for. He has the support of his family. Everything in his life is perfect.

He’s safe. He’s safe. They’re safe.

Taehyung sighs, closing his eyes to block out the bright light, hoping that a headache won’t start to bloom in his head, he doesn’t need that now.

Once upon a time, he didn’t have this life, believe it or not. There was no Jeongguk, no Yerim, no new baby, no mark on his neck. Just him and...his alpha, if that’s what he would even call him.

Hyuntae...Hyuntae, Hyuntae, Hyuntae, Hyuntae, Hyuntae, his mind recites.

The name daunts him, disgusts him, his body shuddering. It’s hard to say his name, Taehyung choking on the two burdensome syllables, like catarrh sitting in the back of his throat.

Tall, dark, handsome...the fit body of a god...masculine to the max...charming and alluring...everything an alpha is supposed to be.

His scent...Taehyung will never forget that scent. Leather and tobacco, warm and spicy. How he loved that smell, how intoxicating it was. It was enough to bring him to his knees, enough to make him bare his neck in submission, enough for slick to soak through his pants.

His scent would stick to everything Taehyung owned: furniture, his clothes, he was the omega that loved to “borrow” his boyfriend’s hoodie, his bed sheets...the heaviness of it would enclose him in comfort that spoke volumes as if he was receiving a warm hug he never wanted to be released from.

When they went to the club, the cafe, the movies, the park, above all other scents, he smelled nothing but him, and he loved it, loved it so much. Hyuntae scenting him was like telling the whole of Daegu that Taehyung was his and his only.

Then, gradually, it became a scent he loathed. Suffocating him within proximity when he wanted to be left alone, a scent he wanted to wash off every single item of his, a scent that wasn’t defined as comfort any longer.

Just a whiff of cigarettes or fresh leather and he descends into a downward spiral.

He needs to find a bench.

He’s vaguely aware of himself biting at his lip, gnawing and peeling at the skin until a metallic taste fills his mouth. He wants to open his eyes, but if he does, the beautiful park is going to spin around like a carousel, wondering where he is and if this is all nothing but a dream. The screams, laughter, and chatter intensify full max until it echoes in his ears.

He sinks deeper and deeper into his head, trying to claw himself out of the darkness, screaming and hoping for someone to hear him.

He’s drowning, he’s choking, his pleas go ignored. He flails his arms, sinking further and further, and now-

“Eomma.”

He opens his eyes.

Face to face with Yerim, he sees the worry tinged in her eyes, her mouth in a scared pout. The same goes on with Jeongguk. He traces the expressions on their faces, looking around to feel wood underneath his hands. At least he found a bench, albeit he’s sprawled haphazardly along the length of it.

Fuck, I need to breathe, he thinks as he pants, his chest feeling like it’s constricting in on itself.

“Are you okay?” Taehyung releases a quivering breath as Jeongguk brushes his bangs back, feeling his forehead. “Are you hot? Thirsty?”

The hand touching him is real, the warm palm tenderly touching his forehead. The man standing in front of him, right at this moment, is real. The scents are real. He can smell Yerim’s milky scent, too young to develop her own scent. Jeongguk’s rose and musky scent flow into his nose, such an unusual scent for an alpha, but it calms him, and he feels nothing but tranquility. The baby’s real; he can make out them kicking around his insides, feeling the same emotion as their Eomma, even though they don’t know why.

This is real. This is real. This is real. This is real.

Taehyung pats his face and neck, touching the slightly sticky skin. “I am feeling kind of hot." He half sits on the bench, his arms holding him up.

“Are you okay, Eomma?” Yerim climbs up on the bench, huddling into his side. She tucks her face in his neck, nuzzling in the spot. What a sweet girl. “You’re really sweaty.”

Taehyung chuckles. “I’m okay, Yerim, I’m just hot." He rubs her back, reassuring her that her Eomma’s okay, the intimacy of hugging his daughter what he needed. “Eomma’s okay. I just needed to sit down real quick.”

“And you look like you need some water and AC,” Jeongguk says, offering his hand. “Let’s go home before you pass out.”

“Is Yerim done playing?” He looks down at the little girl. They promised Yerim she could go to the park if she helped Taehyung clean around the house: she picked up all her toys, wiped down every surface Taehyung sprayed, and vacuumed with the guidance of Jeongguk, his big hand holding onto her little one as he helped her steer the machine around the living room.

She had a little too much fun with cleaning the toilet. The bluish, frothy bubbles were her favorite part as she scrubs around the rim with the toilet brush, saying she needed to get all the yucky germs out. He has never seen someone so excited to flush the toilet, Yerim watching the bubbles go down with a proud smile.

“I’m ready to go home,” Yerim voices, surprising both of her parents. “Eomma needs to go home.”

It usually takes some persuading from both of them to get Yerim to leave the park. “She’s just trying to get home in time for Miraculous.” Jeongguk winks and rubs Yerim’s hair to tease her, and then they are both giggling. Yerim doesn’t even deny that she wants to make it home in time for her favorite show.

That comes on at 5 and Taehyung looks around the park as some of the visitors start to leave, returning to their houses for the day.

“Alright,” he says. He takes Jeongguk’s hand and pulls himself up, groaning. Yerim hops off the bench and takes her parents’ hands, retelling every single episode of Miraculous. Honestly, it’s mostly Taehyung nodding along to what she’s saying and Jeongguk asking her details because Jeongguk is just a big kid at heart who has watched every episode with her.

Taehyung takes a few more breaths before they cross the street to the convenience store. Taehyung holds on tight to his daughter’s hand, swinging her right hand in his grip. Yerim opens the door to the shop, eyebrows knitted, but she has enough strength to open the door, the bell tinkling to greet them.

Taehyung quickly finds the strawberry sandwiches on his way to the front counter and picks up a container. He grabs a container of dango, and sighing, goes for the three red matcha mochi roll. Great, he’s doing this again. It’s ridiculous. But, the cashier doesn’t think so as she scans his items, smiling down at his belly. Cravings, he says. But is it really? Or is it an excuse he's trying to make himself believe?

It repeats non-stop in his head. He is safe. He is safe. Yerim is safe. Yerim is safe. They’re safe.

Taehyung goes over the compartments of the fridge, drumming on his fingers on the door to what he could prepare for dinner.

There’s a bag of rice cakes he might as well use the rest of; he takes it out and sets it behind him on the counter. There’s a large Tupperware container full of kimchi from his mother. He pots the top off to see they have about three centimeters left of the fermented cabbage, good enough to mix with some rice. He scans over everything one last time, close to shutting the fridge, when he sees a forgotten jar of danmuji on the door, again, from his mother. It’s added to the counter.

Tonight’s dinner is cheesy tteokbokki, kimchi fried rice, and danmuji.

Yerim stands by him, looking over the food on his tippy-toes. “Go wash your hands, Yerim.”

She grabs her stool and sets it in front of the sink, Taehyung coming up behind her and turning on the water.

They pump soap into their hands, running it underneath the warm water. Taehyung smiles as they sing “Happy Birthday” as she’s being taught in her kindergarten class.

They wash off the remaining bubbles and wipe their hands on the towel. “Are we ready?”

“We need our scarfs, Eomma.”

Taehyung touches his hair, feeling the fluffiness of it. “Yes, we do; thank you for reminding me.” He grabs the olive green bandana he keeps in one of the kitchen drawers, slipping it over his head and pushing his hair back. He takes out her flower scarf and ties it around her head, pulling her braid through the hole he makes. “Are we ready now?”

“Appa!” Yerim yells. “It’s cooking time!”

Jeongguk looks up from his tablet, saving whatever he’s working on, and shuts it off. He comes into the kitchen, surveying the ingredients with eyebrows raised a fraction of an inch.

“We finally found a reason to use what’s left of the kimchi?” Jeongguk picks up the container. “Is it still good?”

“It’s old, but still good for some kimchi fried rice. Right?” Taehyung wiggles his eyebrows.

Jeongguk snickers. “Alright.” Jeongguk pushes his sleeves up. “What are we doing?”

“Well, I thought Yeye and I would do the tteokbokki and you can do the rice. Sound good?”

“I’m good with that.” He opens the cupboard to heave their bulky bag of short-grain white rice out, grunting as he sets it onto the counter. Taehyung always goes for the larger bags with how much rice they eat daily.

Jeongguk turns on the rice cooker, opening the bag. Yerim clears her throat and tugs his shirt. “You didn’t wash your hands. You can’t cook with dirty hands, Appa.”

“Okay, okay, okay.” He holds her hands up with mock surrender, turning on the sink. “I’m sorry.” He pumps soap into his hands and shows them to Yerim before he shoves them underneath the water.

He and Yerim get to work, pouring the tteokbokki into a bowl to soak, and Yerim digs through their cabinets for a pot, handing it to Taehyung to set on the stove.

“Am I clean now, Yerim?” Jeongguk lets her inspect his hands, she gives him a thumbs up.

Jeongguk takes his phone, leans it against the windowpane, and turns on his playlist, the first notes of a guitar ringing out as Jeongguk turns to him suggestively.

Taehyung smiles hearing Eddy Kim and Jeongguk’s voices blend together seamlessly, the alpha maintaining eye contact and doing that damn smirk of his; making Taehyung look away and hide a bashful half-laugh.

Even before they were dating, Jeongguk’s singing turned his brain to mush. All of his attention would be on the serenading alpha, and his feelings haven’t changed since they’ve mated. Jeongguk always kept eye contact with Taehyung whenever he would sing, the songs expressing the things he wanted to say to Taehyung.

Jeongguk’s front presses into Taehyung’s back, his hands holding Taehyung’s waist, the omega pour the rice cakes into the pot. Jeongguk noses the side of his face, close to scenting him.

“Aren’t you supposed to be making the rice?” Taehyung giggles.

“Am I?”

“Yes.”

“Well, it’s hard to keep focus when there’s a gorgeous man standing here.” Jeongguk lightly kisses his mating bite.

Taehyung turns his face to kiss at his favorite mole on Jeongguk’s neck, humming contentedly in the warm skin. Ugh, he’s in such a cuddling mood right now.

Little hands pat on his belly, Yerim hangs onto the front of his shirt, swaying with the movement of her parents.

Taehyung pulls her closer with one arm and rubs his fingertips through Jeongguk’s hair with the other so that they're pressed in a close circle, nothing separating them.

Except for the rice cakes that could overcook if he doesn’t get to them, and as pleasant as it is to have his two favorite people hang all over him, they are supposed to be cooking.

“Okay, alright. Everyone back to work.” He lightly pats Yerim’s bottom, and the little girl steps up on her stool, and he has to untangle Jeongguk’s arms from around his waist and points him towards the rice cooker. Jeongguk grins at him and leaves a kiss on his temple.

Simple gestures like that meant the world to him, fortunate to be receiving that kind of love. It was that kind of love that made him feel like he didn’t deserve it. Like he was unworthy of love at all, hence why he holds on to the small moments he has with a special someone.

He remembers the love he had years ago. How invigorating and pristine it was at its best...but, then, it fizzled out, leaving him drained and trapped.

He remembers his first meeting Hyuntae. Just Peachy!, Jung-gu, Daegu. It was Taehyung’s go-to place during his college years. It was a cafe he deeply loved, the outdoor seating, their unlimited choice of drinks, including his favorite, the strawberry tea with a plate of chocolate chip waffles. It was the perfect place for picking up where he left off in his sketchbook, coloring in the landscape of his grandparent’s farm.

It was given that it was the perfect place to meet someone.

Taehyung shaded the top of his grandparent’s house with his brown colored pencil when his order was called.

Medium strawberry tea with a splash of almond milk, the barista placed the plastic cup and straw for the owner to grab. Taehyung went over, anticipating the sweet taste of the milk and the fresh taste of the strawberries.

When his hand wrapped around the lukewarm cup, someone’s warm hand touched his at the same time. He looked up at the stranger as if in slow motion, the acoustic music in the background only adding to the romantic appeal.

He knows, he knows. How very K-drama of him.

His eyes traced over the stranger’s face and body. Warm brown eyes. Tan skin. Soft, luscious, black locks. Strong, soft hand. Leather and tobacco. Alpha. Alpha. Alpha.

Oh, sorry, the alpha said, removing his hand, revealing a perfect row of white teeth as he shyly smiled.

And that’s what did it for him. Next thing he knows, they’re sitting across from one another at his table. Song Hyuntae, the alpha introduced himself. Oldest alpha son of Song Hyunwoo, CEO of Song Textile Industries, and next to inherit the position.

He didn’t say it with the usual bravado Taehyung has heard in other alphas, it was accompanied with a bashful smile and a rubbing of the neck. How cute.

From the six hours they were chatting, he learned Hyuntae had five younger siblings, three brothers, and two sisters, he’s allergic to garlic, he likes to paint in his spare time and is not much for the city life, preferring to live in the countryside just like Taehyung.

He ticked off every one of Taehyung’s boxes. He’s handsome, he’s kind, he’s a family man, and not to sound predatory, but he’s well-to-do.

One month, they grew comfortable with each other. They texted each other every day; his weekends were filled with plans with Hyuntae: the movies, restaurants, botanic gardens, museums. They had their first kiss at a local carnival, Hyuntae bowing his head to meet Taehyung’s lips on the Ferris wheel.

Two months, they spend each and every day with each other, either at Hyuntae’s apartment or Taehyung’s dorm whenever his roommate is out. And it’s when they became exclusive.

I have been thinking about this for a while now, so I’m just going to say it before I chicken out, Taehyung, will you be omega? He asked with a bouquet of roses. Taehyung was stunned for a couple of seconds before he answered with a deep kiss, tossing the bouquet behind him as they fell onto his bed, laughing and smiling into the kiss.

Skip to five months, they've met each other’s families. Taehyung’s family welcomed Hyuntae with open arms; their dining table covered with food his mother and grandmother made for the visit. After dinner, Hyuntae and his father were off on one side of the living room talking, and his mom whispering into his ear that Hyuntae is a keeper and jokingly said to leech off of his parents.

As well as Hyuntae's visit went with his family, Taehyung couldn't say the same for his family. He didn't do well under pressure. When you have an alpha drilling question after question of your intentions, an omega who makes snarky comments about your face and appearance, and five siblings who think you're just after their fortune, it's hard to keep everything in.

That night ended with tears and a profuse amount of distress that Hyuntae’s parents won’t ever accept him. Hyuntae curled around him in his bed, Taehyung breathing in his leather and tobacco scent to quell his sorrows and dreads.

The six months they spent together were flawless, he was head over heels in love, and he didn’t care who knew. It was more than he could ever ask for.

He, without a doubt, believed Hyuntae was the one.

But sometimes, some things made him question if that was really true.

It was the little things, stuff he didn’t pay any attention to nor questioned, stuff he didn’t think twice about.

They were at one of Hyuntae’s friend’s apartments, Jiwoo if he remembered correctly, and because he was a pretty nice guy, he ordered everyone takeout-fried chicken, sotteok, fried rice and bought some snacks from the convenience store for a movie night.

He didn’t eat much the whole day but was practically salivating at the mouth when he saw and smelled the delicious food. He didn’t wait to get his hands on the chicken, rice, and about three skewers of the sotteok.

He immediately scarfed down his chicken, sucking on the bone to get the extra bits. Hyuntae chuckled at him, and Taehyung looked up at him. Damn, babe... He peeked into the box. Save some for everyone else. I don’t need you to get big on me now. He patted Taehyung’s stomach.

His friends laughed along with him, loud and boisterous. Taehyung did his own little giggle, looking around at everyone else as he placed down his next piece of chicken back in the box.

Even though he laughed, his face burned hot and his insides twisting themselves into a tight knot, humiliated. Why did he say that?

He leaned away when Hyuntae tried to put an arm around him. Hyuntae clicked his tongue in annoyance.

Tae, I was just kidding. He kissed his neck. It was a joke.

But was it? It played over and over and over in his head like a vinyl record knocked off track, gutting him each time he thought of the words.

He self-consciously felt around his stomach, squeezing the slight pudge, his stomach bloated from eating. Has it always been this soft, and all it took was for someone to notice and say something to him?

Maybe he did need to slow it down with the eating. Maybe he did need to work out more. He’ll start joining Hyuntae at the gym. Yeah, a run on the treadmill and some crunches would do him some good.

Hyuntae is just looking out for him. Who wouldn’t want their boyfriend to be healthy? Hyuntae just wanted him to be healthy.

Then, the time they were going to hit the club for the night.

Taehyung was the sexiest he ever felt. He recently dyed his hair a light brown and had his bangs swept across his forehead. He wore his brand new black, sheer shirt, the three top buttons opened to reveal his golden chest, the tightest jeans to show off the outline of his butt, and boots.

He left the bathroom after doing his eye makeup, a sultry smokey eye he’s been practicing. Hyuntae sat on the couch, decked out in all in black, reminding Taehyung of a gang leader, his legs opened in his position like he wanted Taehyung to straddle him. Oh, fuck me.

Hyuntae looked him up and down, Taehyung not expecting the frown that was thrown his way.

What are you wearing? Hyuntae scoffed and got up from the couch.

This is my-my outfit tonight, Taehyung mumbles, shrinking away from Hyuntae’s intimidating stare. You don’t like it?

If I want every alpha at the club to look at my omega, then yeah. He picked at Taehyung’s shirt collar.You’re dressed like a fucking whore. If I didn’t know you, I would think you’re one of the prostitutes you see hanging around the place. If I didn’t know any better, it’s like you want some random alpha to fuck you while I’m standing right there.

Taehyung was shocked beyond everything he ever imagined when he heard that. He's not an attention whore, rather the opposite. He didn’t dress the way he did for that purpose; he didn’t know how to feel being accused like that.

Hyuntae sniffed along his neck and around his personal space. I can still smell you. Did you take your suppressants? Your scent blockers?”

Taehyung shook his head, and Hyuntae groaned. Taehyung, I got you the prescriptions for this exact reason. A nightclub is the last place where you want some brute alpha to snatch you up, take you to some dirty alleyway to have their way with you, then cut you up in tiny pieces. I got the prescriptions because I love you and want to protect you. There are alphas out there who aren’t as considerate as I am and let you walk out like this because they don't care about the safety of their omega. You’re a beautiful omega, and you have an intoxicating scent, and someone out there is going to want to take advantage of that. Is that what you want, babe? Do you want those alphas to think you’re just some cum slut they can nut in?

Taehyung shook his head, whimpering and ducking his head in shame.

Well, then, please go take your pills and change.

Taehyung shuffled to the bedroom, took off the sheer shirt, the tight jeans, but he kept the boots. He exchanged the clothes for a sweater and some baggy jeans that he didn’t have the heart to tell his grandma were too big when she bought them.

Hyuntae surprised him with a trip to “the best OB/GYN in Daegu” Doctor Im. After a thorough examination and a lengthy discussion, they settled on him taking both suppressants and scent blockers, just so he’s one hundred percent safe. He wrote Taehyung a prepaid prescription and instructed him to pick up the pills the next day. He listened intently to the doctor’s no-bullshit lecture until he was blue as his shirt about taking it daily, which he hasn’t been following through with, to be honest, and listing the side effects: weight gain, headaches, nausea, and decreased libido, stuff he was able to handle.

He took the blue and green pills with a chug of water. He dried his face after washing the eye makeup off and stared into his reflection. Did Hyuntae have his own prescriptions? His scent was strong in the living room when he was getting upset; burnt leather is not a great smell. Why does Taehyung have to suppress his lavender scent, and Hyuntae got to flourish in his musky scent?

Hyuntae would just be in the position as Taehyung if his rut were to start in a club; someone could take advantage of him just like they would if it was an omega in heat. His heart quivered at the thought of someone taking him in a dark alleyway where no one could hear him, tearing his clothes off him to force themselves on him, and discarding him like a piece of trash.

What a horrible death that would be.

Hyuntae did this to protect him. He only wants his omega to be safe. It’s a thought only a well-meaning alpha would have.

He preened at Hyuntae’s proud smile when he saw his outfit and gave Taehyung a kiss as a reward for taking his pills.

But from what he remembered, he didn’t have any fun that night.

He sat at a booth with his drink, spinning the straw with the tip of his finger while Hyuntae talked to a bunch of alphas, betas, and omegas, the latter flirtatiously batting their lashes at him, and Hyuntae didn’t seem to be bothered in the slightest, instead look as if he was reveling in the attention.

All Taehyung could do was sip on his drink and watch on from his booth, a sad, lonely, pitiful, omega through the eyes of others.

A beeping interrupts his whirling thoughts, bringing him back to reality. He opens the microwave to a medium bowl full of melted cheese. Clatters and rattles go on behind him, Jeongguk and Yerim setting the table, steam rising from tonight’s dishes.

Dinner’s ready.

The food smells delicious, especially since Taehyung hadn’t really had lunch; he knows he shouldn’t be skipping meals like that. He wanted to get something from the nearby food trucks at the park, but he was sidetracked from that.

He did eat the snacks he got from the convenience store. Sitting with Yerim to watch her show, he ate all three of the red matcha mochi rolls and the skewers of dango, disappointed in himself after he was done. He thought he had a handle on this. However, after the park, he needed something to make him forget, and those snacks were that thing.

Of course, no one’s going to say anything to him. You’re pregnant; you have every reason in the book to eat whatever you want. You’re growing a human being, for God’s sake. No one would dare to say anything to you in fear of calling you fat.

Yerim squeals, using her chopsticks to pick up some tteokbokki; the melted cheese stretches from her bowl. They’re having dinner at their island, Yerim sitting between them. Taehyung knows Yerim likes it when the cheese is stretchy with this dish, and sometimes he’ll let her go crazy with the mozzarella, like now. Her boxy grin widens as she slurps the cheese in loud delight.

Taehyung munches on some danmuji, the yellow flesh crunching under his teeth. The baby rolls around sluggishly, waking up in time for dinner. He thought his appetite would’ve come back after he stuffed himself with sweets, but his stomach is waylaid by the heavy feeling that had set in his stomach hours ago. “Make sure you eat the rice cakes. I don’t want you filling up on just cheese.”

Yerim whines as Taehyung splits the stretched cheese with the help of his chopsticks and fingers. Taehyung scoops up a good portion of kimchi fried rice and five slices of danmuji.

“Your bowls don't look full either, yeobo.” Jeongguk piles some of the danmuji into Taehyung’s mini bowl, the omega sighing.

“Don’t sigh. You’re eating for two, Tae, baby boy needs to eat as well.” Jeongguk spoons some rice into Taehyung’s bowl.

Alpha instincts.

They’re there to protect everything dear to an Alpha. Their mate. Their pups. Their pack, back when there were close-knitted communities and people lived off the land, before society evolved and packs disbanded and went their separate ways.

Right now, Jeongguk’s instincts are telling him his mate and pup don’t have enough to eat and trying to pile everything they have in his bowls.

“Jeon Jeongguk,” he says in mild exasperation. “That’s enough!” He swats Jeongguk’s chopsticks away.

Yerim laughs, copying Jeongguk. “Have a rice cake, Eomma.” She picks up a rice cake that’s absolutely drenched in sauce and sets it in Taehyung’s bowl.

“Thank you, Yeye.” He pops it into his mouth, humming at the spiciness dancing over his taste buds.

“Oh, I see...she gets a thank you and you try to hit me with chopsticks,” Jeongguk pouts.

“Because Yerim’s cute, simple as that,” Taehyung deadpans.

Jeongguk gasps dramatically, grasping at his heart. “I am wounded, yeobo! You don’t think I’m cute?”

“I think you’re cute, Appa!” Yerim smiles.

“Really? You think so?” Jeongguk bats his lashes. “Thank you, Yeye.” He gives her butterfly kisses on her cheek, the little girl giggling and tucking the cheek into her neck.

Taehyung chuckles at them, feeling so grateful to have a mate who does so well with his daughter.

Most alphas wouldn’t want a child that isn’t biologically theirs. Most would go as far as to actually ignore the illegitimate child, preferring to tend to their own, creating a sense of loneliness and rejection in the unwanted pup. But Jeongguk hasn’t done that at all. Jeongguk has taken in Yerim like she’s his very own and raising her to the best of his abilities.

Taehyung scoffs. “You’re unbelievable.

“You’re cute, too, Eomma.”

Taehyung grins, taking a sip of his juice.

Jeongguk picks up his dirty dishes and leaves a kiss on Taehyung’s temple on his way to the sink. “Eat up, the baby has to eat, too, Eomma.”

He looks down at his full bowls, exhaling deeply. As hungry as he wasn’t, he can’t deprive the baby of their nutrients. You might as well finish this, he thinks as he scoops some fried rice into his mouth.

The rice is nice and crispy, the flavor slightly sweet and sour, chocked full of garlic. Just like back home, his mom would be proud.

The dishes are a welcomed distraction, giving his mind the chance to clear itself of the inner turmoil. Filling up the sink with warm water, squirting in dish soap, slipping on his green rubber gloves, and picking up the first dirty dish, the motions bring him an odd sense of calm. Yerim’s upstairs getting washed for the night, and Jeongguk packs up their leftovers in the fridge, stacking them neatly.

Now, he would be usually chomping on his strawberry sandwich he got, but he wasn’t up for the delectable treat, saving it for Yerim after she’s done washing up.

From the pile, he picks up Yerim’s bubblegum pink bowl. He fills it up with soap and water, his other hand dunking underneath to soak his rag. He hasn’t thought about him in years, but...why now, why when he’s at peace where no one can hurt him or trap him against his will? He doesn’t want to think of it; he doesn’t like the feelings brought up with it. Just why?

Taehyung closes his eyes. His anxiety isn’t the easiest thing to deal with. Even if he did leave the leading source of it, it’s something that will never go away as long as he lives. The terrible words he had to endure replay in his head, proving the power they hold over him, which he feels like they shouldn’t by now.

Anything that needed healing should've been healed. It should’ve.

But the words beat that assumption. They were real; they were tangible and easier to believe no matter how much Taehyung didn’t want to, no matter how much he tried to push the gut-wrenching words out of his mind.

He scrubs at the bowl, ridding the appliance of the red sauce it was drenched in with more fervor than what was deemed necessary.

He needs to clean this bowl. It needs to be spotless. He looks at the other dishes he has washed so far. Are any of them up to standard? Would Jeongguk be happy with the results?

Dread is not a feeling he enjoys being with; six years of being away from the man he thought loved him brought that damaging company to him. Yet here he is, scrubbing at this bowl like his life depended on it. Everything around him melts into a blur of colors and sounds, his breathing and the ceaseless scrubbing the only things he hears, and the color bright pink the center of his focus. He grips on the bowl tightly with his gloved hand, and just when he feels it about to snap-

“Tae?”

He flinched, coming to sensing a hand softly touching his elbow, Jeongguk’s scent washing over him in lulling waves. His gaze stays down on the pink bowl, still perfectly intact. Yerim would not be happy with him if her favorite bowl broke; he winces at the thought of the tears that would be shed.

He releases the giant breath he didn’t realize was being held in as he puts the bowl on the drying rack. He forces himself to relax, blinking away the tears that gather at the corners of his eyes.

“Everything okay?” Jeongguk rubs his shoulders.

“Yeah,” Taehyung nods shakily, keeping his gaze on the bubbly water, he doesn’t want to see the concerned look he’s sure is on his face.

“You sure?” Jeongguk lightly kisses his mating bite. “Look like you were lost in your head there.”

“Yeah, it’s nothing.” Taehyung pulls a cup out of the water. “I’m...I’m just tired; it’s been a long day.” He vaguely wonders if Jeongguk could see through him, a small part of the alpha has to want to delve into what was going on in Taehyung’s head.

But it’s not Jeongguk’s burden to shoulder, he doesn’t want to add his problems to everything else Jeongguk does.

Jeongguk’s hands go from his shoulders down to his hands in the water, pulling them out. “Come on.”

“What?” He has a moment of alarm- did I do something wrong? Was I not supposed to voice my complaint?

Jeongguk slips off the rubber gloves and sets them on the counter. “You are going to go sit down in the living room and rest your feet. You haven’t had a moment to sit down all day.”

His body must’ve numbed the sensation, because now that he has said it, he can feel the bothersome pins and needles in his feet and if he had the energy to lift his foot, he’s sure they’re swollen to the max.

Yet, the counter needs to be wiped down, the floor swept and mopped. “How about I-”

Jeongguk seals Taehyung’s lips close with his finger. “I got it. Your chore tonight is to take time to yourself and relax.”

Taehyung pouts but relents. He cups Jeongguk’s face and Jeongguk lets his finger off his lips. “Okay, I’ll go rest.”

Jeongguk smiles, puckering his lips, and Taehyung takes the invitation, pecking Jeongguk’s lips and then sliding his mouth over his. Licking up Jeongguk’s tongue, he tastes sweet from the strawberry sandwich. He tips Taehyung’s chin up to deepen the kiss. They gravitate riskily as close as they can get with the bump in between them until Taehyung breaks the kiss and has to snicker at the alpha’s pout.

He already knows where this is going. Sex won't be a good idea at this time with an innocent child running around the house. Taehyung doesn't even want to move his hand down because he knows he'll feel Jeongguk's bulge, and it would be over for the both of them. Jeongguk tries to chase after his lips, Taehyung leaning away.

Taehyung pats him on his chest. “I’ll leave you to it, and you better do it right or else.”

“Or else what?” Jeongguk nips at Taehyung’s retreating butt, the omega letting out a high-pitched yelp and swatting at Jeongguk’s side.

Jeongguk laughs, slipping on the rubber gloves.

From all the seats in the living room, he picks the recliner Seokjin bought as a housewarming gift-the newly engaged couple at first refused to take it because of how expensive it must have been-it's a massager with two cup holders pointing to how high-end it is. But the beta insisted it was nothing. He sits heavily on it, throwing the seat back so his feet can be propped up. He closes his eyes, moaning at the ache in his back leaving his body.

Seokjin was the first friend he made here in Seoul. Lonely and miserable, the beta took him under his wing, helping him out no matter how much Taehyung insisted he could do it on his own: he came around a lot to Taehyung’s old, tiny apartment, dropping off food he prepared for the pregnant omega, taking him to his appointments, helping him prepare items for the new baby, and being a crutch to hold Taehyung up when things got hard.

If it weren’t for Seokjin, he wouldn’t have made it out here.

He lets himself listen. Dishes clanks in the kitchen and Yerim’s little feet skip to her room. Taehyung lets every sound sink into him, filling his ears and lungs and the crevices in his heart. He lets everything fall away and just feels. Feel the other presences in the house and just feel that he’s not alone.

I’m not alone. I’m not alone. I’m not alone.

Nine months into the relationship, Taehyung moved out of his dorm and into Hyuntae’s apartment. The alpha, as a romantic gesture, gifted Taehyung the key in a white box with a bow. Taehyung was flabbergasted, his mouth bobbed like a fish gulping air before he found his voice to accept this. It was a whole new level in their relationship, both scary and rousing.

It was the domestic life Taehyung had dreamed of: both coming home to each other after a day of work and school, making dinner together, cuddling on the couch with snacks and a good movie, showering together, and spooning in their shared bed.

But the blissful bubble lasted for two weeks before it popped.

Hyuntae started coming home late, smelling heavily of alcohol. Taehyung had to spend dinners by himself, snuggle only with his blanket on the couch with a movie, and go to bed alone. Chores weren’t being done in the house, not like they used to be. The dishes, for instance, Hyuntae, either ignored the growing pile or would subtly make an excuse not to do them.

Where are you going? Taehyung asked, setting up his easel, his jars of paint and brushes ready on the table next to him. His assignment was to do a self-portrait using grids.

He already knew sketching the grids and his chosen picture was going to take him a while, leaving him with no time to do the dishes.

Going out with the guys. Hyuntae picked up his keys, twirling them around his fingers.

You said you were going to do the dishes tonight. I have an assignment to do.

I never told you I was going to do that. Hyuntae slipped his shoes on.

Taehyung had to pause arranging his brushes for a moment.

Yes, he did. Taehyung specifically remembered the alpha saying he would take over the chore because Taehyung needed to start his painting. Taehyung tried to think of ways to defend his claim, but he had nothing. They don’t even have a chore wheel to specify whose turn it is to do a chore.

You might as well do the dishes plus everything else. It’s your job as the omega, right? Hyuntae smirked.

Taehyung’s jaw dropped.

Don’t wait up. Hyuntae leaves, not once looking back at Taehyung. He didn’t even give him a goodbye kiss.

Taehyung stood in that same spot in front of his easel to make sure he heard that right.

Did Hyuntae genuinely want him here because he was ready for his boyfriend to live with him, or did he just want a live-in maid? Apparently, It didn’t matter if he had a painting assignment due in a week; as an omega, he’s supposed to juggle that along with the household chores.

He could easily blame it on Hyuntae’s upbringing. His family was more on the conservative side. The alpha is the breadwinner; everyone has to abide by his rules as the omega cares for the children and cooks and cleans, and is submissive to their alpha at all times. Judging from those facts, Taehyung believes Hyuntae’s mother never had the chance to go to college, groomed to be the perfect omega wife for her future alpha husband.

On the other side of the pasture, Taehyung came from an open-minded background. His parents view each other as equals; there was no dominance from his father for his mother to respect him as the alpha. Now, Taehyung's parents wanted their son to go to college and achieve something in his life without relying on an alpha to give him the things he wants. But he knows they were secretly hoping he would meet an alpha and give them some grandchildren.

He couldn’t concentrate on etching the grid because the sentence kept running through his head non-stop.

It’s your job as the omega. It’s your job as the omega. It’s your job as the omega. It’s your job as the omega. It’s your job as the omega.

He tried to simply shake it off, but couldn’t.

It was a funny memory. Taehyung wanted to write it off as a one-time comment. He wished to think it was nothing, even as the words ran on repeat until he finally succumbed to them. Instead of holding his pencil to his canvas, he was gripping a sponge to the bowl that served his mom’s reheated sundubu jjigae. Instead of being in his zone and getting lost in colors, he was elbow deep in dishwater and unclogging a piece of leftover enoki mushroom out of the drain.

It was funny because he knew he shouldn’t have given up so easily. Any other omega wouldn’t have taken that comment and would’ve left the dishes alone, a token of defiance that any other omega would’ve proudly shown.

He never started his painting that night, exhausting after doing the dishes, cleaning the kitchen, vacuuming the living space, and switching the comforters off their bed. He didn’t know why he did all the extra chores. He could’ve left something for the fully capable alpha that lives with him to do.

He woke up alone that morning and found Hyuntae sprawled on the couch, red lipstick smeared across his collar.

He doesn’t need to open his eyes to know whose fingertips are caressing his cheekbone, sweeping a thumb over his lips.

“Hey, beautiful,” Jeongguk smiles at him once his eyes crack open, a glass of juice in his hand. “I got you some peach juice.” Jeongguk’s voice is steady and slow, Taehyung’s chest fluttering.

Taehyung graciously takes the glass, sipping the subdued sweetness of peaches.

“Did you enjoy your little nap?” Jeongguk asks.

Taehyung takes notice of the living room blanket spread out on his lap. He purrs and stretches in the recliner. “I didn’t sleep long, did I?”

“Nah, just a quick half hour nap.” Jeongguk assures him. “You looked like you needed it, anyway.”

Taehyung presses behind his eyelids with the heels of his palms, rubbing the sleepiness from his swollen eyes.

“How’s he doing?” Jeongguk sneaks a hand down and underneath Taehyung’s shirt, adoringly touching the stretched skin.

“They’re still sleeping, it’s very still in there,” Taehyung cheekily retorts. “Might wake up as soon as I get out of this chair, though.”

“Hmm...Let me see the glass.” Jeongguk takes the glass from him and sets it atop his belly, his hands hovering by its sides.

“What are you doing?” Taehyung chuckles. He knows exactly what he’s doing.

“Ssshhh!” He slowly removes his hands away, his eyes getting wider the longer the cup stays.

Taehyung doesn’t bother to fight the goofy grin making its way up his face seeing Jeongguk. He’s so cute.

The excitement doesn’t last long when the baby shifts and the glass starts to topple with the little bit of juice left, Taehyung saving it at the last moment.

“Jeongguk, I don’t need it to spill on the carpet.” Taehyung downs what’s left in the glass.

“Oh, buddy, we were so close.” Jeongguk leans in close to his curved belly button. “We just needed five more seconds from you.”

Taehyung watches Jeongguk smooth a hand over the surface, his cheek rubbing his scent on his shirt. This isn’t the first time Jeongguk has done this, but he gets giddy each time. He’s thankful, so incredibly thankful to have a mate who’s so involved in the pregnancy, who reads every book he can get his hands on, providing every little thing Taehyung needs and keeps a scrapbook of the unborn baby’s ultrasounds and pictures of Taehyung and Yerim.

“Buddy? And you called them ‘baby boy’ while we were having dinner.”

“Yeah, because something tells me our little Soobin is in here.” Jeongguk smiles, bunny teeth on show, eyes crinkling into small slits.

“Soobin? You have a name picked out? What if they’re a girl?” Taehyung rests his head on his closed fist.

“Her name would be Yeseo,” Jeongguk says with no hesitation.

Genuine surprise flowed through him. Jeongguk has actually taken time to think of these names, and he has to admit, he chose the perfect ones.

Jeon Soobin. Jeon Yeseo.

“Where did you hear these names?”

“Well...Soobin came from a baby book and Yeseo is the name of a Youtuber’s daughter, and I fell in love with both names,” Jeongguk sheepishly admits.

Taehyung coos tenderly, his fingers combing Jeongguk’s hair back. “We only have a few months left until we find out.”

“Why can’t we know now?” Jeongguk whines.

“Because I want it to be a surprise. Wouldn’t that be nice? Imagine when the baby’s born and you, their appa, get to announce their gender to the whole room.”

Jeongguk ponders with a concentrated look at his bump. “I get to do it?”

Taehyung sighs fondly. “I’ll make sure to tell Dr. Lee to let you announce the gender, I’ll put it in my birthing plan.”

The file sits on his desk. A page typed out of who will be in the room with him besides Jeongguk, how he wants to give birth, the atmosphere he wants, the equipment Taehyung wants available to him, alternatives to pain meds, and foremost information he wants for the midwife to know.

This birth has to be different. Taehyung wants to be more prepared for this one than he was for Yerim. He doesn’t want to be stressed out like he was last time, mainly because of a sadist alpha male doctor who dictated his whole labor. For instance, Seokjin and his mom had to chew out the doctor because he wouldn’t let Taehyung get out of bed and walk around some. Personally, he thinks that doctor got off to see him writhing in pain on the bed. That was his first and last time having an alpha deliver his baby.

This one will be born in a birthing suite with an omega midwife, and Taehyung has the free will to do whatever he wants. He refuses to have anything spin out of his control like last time.

Jeongguk rests his chin on the bump, leaving a soft kiss on it. “Are you a boy or girl?” he whispers. “Kick if you’re a boy; stay still if you’re a girl.”

Taehyung brushes Jeongguk’s hair back as they wait. Jeongguk’s hair is starting to get long, he notices, brushing along his jawline and long enough to pull in a bun. He’ll have to snip the split ends later.

Jeongguk’s exclaim of surprise makes him jump, he nearly misses the little kick he felt.

“Oh! That was a kick to my nose! It’s a boy!” He pumps his fists in the air, making Taehyung laugh at him. “That means I can get that Avengers onesie I’ve been eyeing.”

“Yeobo, I hate to spoil your little fun, but they probably just kicked because of your voice.”

“Well, then she, too, can wear the Avengers onesie. Little girls can like superhero teams too; we won’t stop her from watching all the Marvel movies. Imagine that, us binge-watching all the Marvel movies.” Jeongguk’s eyes light up at the idea.

Taehyung curled up against Jeongguk, Yerim sitting on his lap, the new baby sleeping in Jeongguk’s comfy arms, a throw blanket covering every inch of them as they watch Iron Man and Captain America go head-to-head with each other?

He can’t wait for when that happens.

Once the exhaustion and the readiness to trade the cozy recliner for their bed, Taehyung lets Jeongguk help him up. Jeongguk hefts him out of the seat and brings him in by his waist, leaving a not-so-chaste kiss on his lips. Taehyung pulls away. “Yerim could come downstairs. You wouldn’t want her to be scarred for life.”

Jeongguk pouts, tucking his face and leaving a kiss on his neck, contented to scent his omega. They sway on their feet, Jeongguk wrapping him in a warm embrace, lost in their own world.

If he could, he would stay like this forever, safe and protected in these arms with no one else around. The gesture is wholly appreciated; it’s more than he expected at the moment. Taehyung knows Jeongguk’s instincts sense something is amiss with his omega. Jeongguk usually gives him time to sort through whatever’s going on with him rather than pressure him into talking about it. He feels butterfly kisses being littered on the soft column of his neck, Taehyung bringing Jeongguk in closer.

“Gotta finish my presentation, then I’ll be up there with you.”

Taehyung pulls back and glares at him like he’s said something offensive. “And how long is that going to take?”

“No more than ten minutes.” Jeongguk kisses his nose, his eyelids. “I promise.”

“You better. Because if you don’t, there will be a very angry omega waiting for you.”

“You’re so cute when you’re angry. You get all pouty, and your eyes get real big, and you waddle all over the place.” Jeongguk sneaks a hand to his ass and gives it a little squeeze, Taehyung jumping.

Taehyung smacks his chest. “So annoying.”

“Love you, too.”

As hard as it was, they separate and head in different directions, Taehyung upstairs and Jeongguk to his office to finish whatever work he had left.

Yerim’s room is the first door on the right as soon as you climb up the steps. Taehyung stands at the entrance and just watches his little girl. Her braid is undone to leave slightly damp, wavy waist-length hair, her red nightgown covering her little body. She pays no mind, humming and playing with her Lego Friends set she got for Christmas from Jeongguk.

“Yeye?” He whispers to not scare her.

She pauses her humming, turning her head. “Hi, Eomma.” And goes back to her Legos.

“What are you doing?”

“Playing at the hair salon.” She shows him one of the mini-figures from the set, bending her legs to sit her in the styling chair.

“Hmm.” Taehyung smiles softly. “Do you want to watch a movie with Eomma and Appa in our room?”

Yerim looks up at him, her wide eyes hopeful. “I get to sleep with you and baby brother?”

Yerim has joined the “boy” side of her unborn sibling. He knows she wants a baby brother because her friend, Eunyoo’s mother, recently had her baby, a little boy, two weeks ago. The family went over to the house for a playdate, and Taehyung immediately gushed over the tiny pup. Through the visit, he cradled the baby, cooing at every little sound he made, and smoothed a finger over his waving fist, wishing for his baby to hurry up so he could do the same to them. On the contrary, Yerim stared at him and poked his chubby cheeks, and telling her Eomma she wants a baby brother as well. As if he has any control over that.

“Sure, Yeye,” he nods. “Just let Eomma and Appa get washed first. And make sure you clean up your toys when Eomma calls you for the movie.”

“Okay,” Yerim says, going back to her Legos and singing to herself.

He lets himself watch for a couple of seconds more, his baby in her little world with her toys, without a care in the world, just like it’s meant to be, his innocent, little baby.

Oh, how I want to protect you.

In the bedroom, Taehyung gathers his pajamas in the dimly lit space, a pair of shorts and one of Jeongguk’s black oversized shirts he “borrowed”-but the alpha doesn’t mind.

He heads to their master bathroom, setting the pajamas on the sink when he hears his phone ring in the room, Seokjin’s contact picture on view. He picks up, and Seokjin starts off without a preamble. " Do you have any extra meat you’re not using? Yoongi’s heat starts Thursday, and you know how he is with meat, actual and mine." He laughs, wheezing a bit at the end.

Taehyung huffs. "Hyung, I have some short ribs I can drop off, but importantly, why do I need to know this?"

"Because I thought omega’s needed to know about each other’s heats. You know, omega solidarity."

Taehyung walks back to the bathroom as they talk, twisting the knobs to turn the water on. " Yoongi and I don’t sit around and talk about our heats."

"I heard you two last week; you were talking about how Jeongguk loves it when you put on your smoky eye makeup and that red lingerie set you wore on your honeymoon. Apparently, Yoongi said that he could barely get me to shut up while I’m inside him."

"TMI, hyung!"

“We’re adults here, Taehyung-ah, we need to have a little sex talk here and there. It’s not like Yerim can hear us, right? A pause. Seriously, I’m not on speaker, am I?”

“I’m Yerim-free, so…” But that’s beside the point. In exchange for the meat I mentioned, could you make some of your famous sundubu-jjigae? Jeongguk has been asking for it.”

"Are we going to pretend you’re not really the one craving for it?"

“Please?” Taehyung whines.

“Fine. I’ll make it, I’ll throw in some kongnamul with the jjigae. I’ll even stop by the bakery and pick up a mille-feuille for my nephew!"

“You, too? You’re jumping in the “it’s a boy” bandwagon?”

“Because it is a boy!”

“And how do you know?” Taehyung fires back.

“You’re carrying lower than you did with Yerim. Remember the ajumma who commented you didn’t look pregnant from the back? Your front is all baby.”

He looks down his belly, his free arm curling underneath the curve of his belly. He goes to the mirror in the bedroom and inspects the side view of his belly.

He’s sure if he pulls up the thousands of pictures Seokjin took of him when he was pregnant with Yerim, maybe he would see some difference in his bump. He has notice his frame actually looks smaller with the belly this time than it did six years ago.

There was no doubt he was going to be huge by the end of this. Damn Jeon genes.

"Taehyung? Hello? You see it, don’t you?"

"I don’t even want to give you the satisfaction of, perhaps, being right."

"Ah! It’s a boy! And I believe the awesome name, Seokjin, would fit him."

"Your name didn’t make it to the list...and Jeongguk and I already have two names picked out."

"Would you like to tell your best friend the names?" Taehyung can imagine Seokjin batting his eyelashes, his cheeks scrunched up in a wide grin.

Taehyung smirks. You only have a few months left until you find out.

No fair! Seokjin cries into the phone.

“What is it with you grown men pouting today?” Taehyung laughs. “ I’m about to tell Yoongi his beta’s being a big ass baby.”

Taehyung stays on call with him for a bit before Seokjin has to prepare their jjigae, and he has to hop in the shower. He places his phone on the sink, strips his clothes off, and steps into the warm water.

He stands under the water, with his eyes closed as he lets it rain over his face and dampen his hair, enjoying the pressure the stream exerts perfectly on his back.

Turning to the their racks full of bottles, he thumbs through them absentmindedly, losing himself at the vast array of colored liquids.

In college, Taehyung had a small circle of friends. They intermingled during his freshman year of college, the older students taking him under their wings. They were just as artsy-fartsy as he was, visiting each other’s dorms to draw and paint, trading pencils and markers, spending their days in cafes to hang out. But, he’ll never forget one friend, Seojoon, who he met at a mini indie concert nearby the campus.

He didn’t know what it was about Seojoon. He was comfortable within the presence of the alpha, enough to not make him stop talking around him, making him insecure. Did Seojoon think he was annoying? Is he too loud? Does he even like him?

But alas, it was none of those things. One thing Seojoon is exceptional at is being a listener. He nodded and offered inputs and kept him company. He looked at Taehyung’s eyes when Taehyung spoke and had a fond expression when Taehyung had been enthusiastically talking about the trip to his childhood home and the new crops his grandparents started harvesting.

Seojoon took him to museums and restaurants and texted Taehyung when he’s made it home safe. Taehyung texted back each and every time. Then, they got into phone calls, an exhilarating rush making his head tingle when those ten digits would pop up.

And okay, he might have had a little crush on him. Who wouldn’t with his sexy dimples, fit body, caring personality, and someone willing to sit and let you vent to them about how awful your day went.

Whoever mated with him would be the luckiest omega ever.

Then, Hyuntae came into the picture and started hanging out with Taehyung’s group, the alpha insisting on coming along for drinks. One thing he never really thought about was the tension between Hyuntae and Seojoon. He never thought anything of it since they were both alphas, and maybe this how all alphas are before they get comfortable with each other.

Both men shook hands upon greeting, stoically nodding at each other, not a word was spoken between them.

Taehyng noticed Hyuntae was... clingier than usual. There wasn’t a moment where one of Hyuntae’s body parts was around him: whether an arm was thrown over his shoulder, arms holding his waist, nose nuzzling at Taehyung’s neck, lips kissing Taehyung’s as he talked to Seojoon, pulling Taehyung possessively into his lap at the table.

The touching continued after the couple left the hole-in-the-wall, Taehyung hugging his friends goodbye. He ignored the growl he heard in his ear when he hugged Seojoon, the hug too long and intimate for Hyuntae’s liking as he practically had to break up the two.

Going off in a separate direction, Hyuntae leaned into his ear. Did you see the way he was staring at you?

Taehyung blinked. Wait, who?

That alpha friend of yours.

Seojoon? Taehyung asked, baffled. How was he looking at me?

You know, like he wanted to get in your pants. With all the...all the touching he was doing. Like he wants to tear your clothes off and ravish you for everyone to see,” he growls, his scent souring with his bitterness. It made Taehyung’s nose wrinkled with displeasure. At Taehyung’s confused look, Hyuntae scoffed. Come on, baby, it was pretty obvious.

Was it because he didn’t get that from Seojoon? He has prided himself on being able to read people’s aura. He was his regular self, laughing, giving out hugs, and lending an ear to Taehyung. Nothing sexual came out of their interaction. Besides, Seojoon naturally has bedroom eyes-he can’t help it. I didn’t get those kinds of vibes from him.

Because you weren’t paying attention. That prick was literally eye-fucking you. Hyuntae stopped them in front of a flower shop, holding Taehyung by his shoulders. Taehyung...I’m not really comfortable with you spending time with him, in case he...you know…

What? Taehyung asked, then caught on to what Hyuntae was implying. Oh, no, Seojoon is not like that! He would never do that. He’s the kindest and gentlest alpha I’ve ever met. He’s a gentleman.

In the dim lighting, Taehyung swore Hyuntae’s right eye twitched. But you don’t know, he could have those urges in him. I know alphas. They could start off nice, they could be your friend, then one day, when they have a pretty omega alone with them and realize the power they have over that omega. They’re bigger, they’re stronger, they’re quicker, no way a tiny omega is going to overpower an alpha. Next thing you know, they’re on top of you, forcing themselves inside of you, ripping you apart, spilling their seed in you like you’re their property, no one coming to your rescue.” Hyuntae’s grip on his shoulders tightened. How would you feel if someone close to you, someone you trust violated you like that? He could flip on you, and you’ll never see it coming.

Taehyung gulped, trembling, imagining the terrifying scenario the longer Hyuntae talked.

Hyuntae’s anger morphed to worry, his eyebrows knitted together, gingerly bringing his hand up to Taehyung’s face.

I just want to protect you. He caressed Taehyung’s cheek. I would hate it if someone hurt you like that, let alone a friend. Please, Tae, promise me you won’t see him again.

Taehyung’s mouth slacked open. Is he really doing this? Is he making Taehyung split with his friendship with Seojoon? Even if he didn’t feel threatened in the slightest?

Taehyung. His eyes flicked up to Hyuntae’s dark eyes. Think about your decision carefully. Hyuntae stood over Taehyung, trapping him in an imaginary corner that made him claustrophobic. It was hard to look away from those eyes, hard to wrench himself out of the tight grip on him.

If he kept being friends with Seojoon, Hyuntae might break up with him, and Taehyung will have to move out of the apartment. If he picks Hyuntae, he’ll lose the best friend he had ever made.

This should be a no-brainer, but it wasn't to him.

Okay, he mumbled, finally being able to look away from Hyuntae’s eyes.

You promise? Hyuntae brought his face back up to his by his chin, holding it in place with his finger.

I promise.

Hyuntae rewarded Taehyung with a lip bruising kiss. It took a few seconds for Taehyung to respond. When he did, he kissed back just as fervently, whimpering as Hyuntae slipped his tongue into his mouth, hands clutching at his hair, drawing him closer.

Someone knocked on the store glass, gaining their attention. The owner, a woman about his mother’s age, frowning disapprovingly at them and gestured for them to go away.

Hyuntae smirked at her, grabbing a handful of Taehyung’s ass and squeezing, Taehyung letting out an involuntary moan. Taehyung is torn between punching Hyuntae in his stomach and continue kissing him until neither of them can breathe. The lady’s eyes widen, her nostrils flaring as she goes for the door.

Hyuntae and Taehyung, by that point, ran away from her.

With Hyuntae standing over him, Taehyung ended the friendship. He felt it would be better for him and Seojoon if he did it by text; as cowardly as that sounded, he just wouldn’t be able to handle the look of betrayal on Seojoon’s face. With a text message, it’ll be quick and painless. It took him ten times to construct the message as nicely as he could that’ll sever the bond they’ve formed and held on to a hope that Seojoon wouldn’t resent him for this. When the text went through, he immediately blocked Seojoon’s number, tossing his phone on the table.

Oh, God, he did it. He couldn’t believe he really did it.

Hyuntae dragged him on his lap, kissing him on his neck, biting teasingly right where he would need to claim Taehyung as his...forever.

As Hyuntae delivered kisses along his throat and collarbone, he couldn’t get rid of the guilt burning his insides as he thought of Seojoon opening his phone and reading the soul-crushing message. His eyes flickered to the phone, every part of him wanting to lunge forward at the device and tell Seojoon he didn’t mean it, but Hyuntae sucked on his neck and Taehyung was gone.

He grabs his washcloth and squirts some body wash into it, lathering soap on his back, rubbing circles across his shoulders before traveling down the lengths of his sides. He closes his eyes and softly breathes the melon scent permeating throughout the bathroom.

Even though Taehyung ended his friendship with Seojoon, he still had his other friends: Minho, Hyungsik, Wooshik, and Sunghwan, omegas, and betas, respectively. The group felt empty without the calming presence of their alpha buddy. Everyone was mindful enough to not address whatever went on between Taehyung and Seojoon.

He wanted to forget the situation so much that he needed to find a party on campus, and he did. A friend of Wooshik’s friend threw a party with the theater group they were a part of. Shots of soju and bottles of beer were passed out to the partygoers; Tiger JK played in the background, Taehyung relaxing on the couch with his friends.

Ooohhh, look at him. Taehyung took a sip of his beer and snuck a glance to whoever Minho had pointed out.

The alpha looked over at them and smirked, talking to a woman next to him. His friends squealed and held onto each other. I bet he’ll come over here, Hyungshik whispers between them.

He tapped his fingers on the bottle. Tap tap tap until his fingertips were throbbing. He took a long, last swig and going for another bottle. He doesn’t do well holding onto his alcohol, and he may be pushing it with two beers may be at this point.

Here he comes! Sunghwan hung onto Taehyung’s shoulder and bounced on the couch. The alpha was getting handsomer the closer he was getting to them. He shouldn’t...he shouldn’t think something like that, he does have a boyfriend.

Hello, the alpha smiled. Are any of you part of the theater? I don't believe I've ever seen you before.

No, we have three future artists and two graphic designers, but I bet being part of the theater would be a fun experience. Minho looks him up and down, giving the alpha a coy grin.

Well, I’m Bae Kyung, majoring in theatre art.

Hyungshik gasps. We just met and you’re already so perfect.

Do you have a thing for theatre students?

Do I ever, Hyungshik whispered.

Kyung laughed. Mind if have a seat with you beautiful bunch?

All five of them scooched over to let him sit, the closet being Minho, who Kyung puts an arm around on the back of the couch. Minho grinned and mouthed, Oh my God, he’s so hot.

And he is if he could admit. He reminds Taehyung of someone from a K-drama, with his side-swept bangs, his bedroom eyes, his plump lips. He’s enormous compared to Minho in height and width, the smaller omega engulfed by his presence.

As a matter of fact, he reminds him vaguely of Seo Kangjoon.

So, do any of you live here on campus? Kyung asked.

Well, the four of us do. Hyungshik pointed at them. But Taehyung lives off-campus with his boyfriend.

Taehyung nudged Hyungshik’s side, nervously laughing.

You do? Kyung grinned cheekily. What a lucky guy.

As if they summoned the being himself, Taehyung heard him first before seeing him.

What the fuck? Hyuntae stepped up to them, the alpha bumping into partygoers. Hyuntae’s blazing eyes locked on Kyung; the heat in his eyes was so intense Taehyung choked on his beer. Hyuntae’s been here all for five seconds, and Taehyung’s cheek burned with humiliation.

What are you doing here? Taehyung sets his drink down. How did he know where he was? Taehyung told him he was going out but never specified as to where or with who.

I’ve been calling and texting you and you haven’t answered!

Taehyung fished out his phone and had to hold in a gasp at the overload of missed calls and unanswered texts. Hyuntae had called him over thirty times and had sent over fifty messages asking him- where he is, what’s he doing, who he’s with.

I’m sorry, I must’ve not heard my phone.

Why exactly are you here? Minho asked, glaring at the fuming alpha.

Hyuntae scoffed. Because I’m a concerned boyfriend, that’s why.

Well, he’s fine, Sunghwan offered. He’s been fine the whole time we’ve been here.

And what a good job you guys are doing. Hyuntae clapped sarcastically, then pointed a finger at Kyung. Who the fuck is this?

Whoa, whoa! Kyung got up with his hands held out in defense. I’m leaving; we don’t have to get into it. Just to let you know, I’ve never touched him.

If I found out the fuck you did..., Hyuntae pounced toward the other alpha, and Taehyung held onto his arm to keep him from bashing the other alpha’s face in. Everyone stopped what they were doing to watch the altercation, Taehyung wishing to find a hole and bury himself in it, to hide away from the curious and judgmental stares.

Stop! Stop it! Taehyung got between them, his forehead heating up from Hyuntae’s harsh breathing, the alpha’s heart pumping erratically underneath his hands.

Hyuntae stopped, growling and baring his teeth at the cowering alpha. You’re not staying. Hyuntae gripped Taehyung by the arm and pulled him out of the room, Taehyung stumbling to keep up. His friends followed behind them, clamoring and trying to stop Hyuntae. The alpha was faster and had Taehyung in the car before they had a chance to reach them.

He forlornly watched his best friends in the side mirror until they were tiny dots in the night.

He picked at his fingernails, something to do with his hands as they started to shake, the silence deafening as Hyuntae’s rapid breathing quieted down. He looked in his boyfriend’s direction every few seconds, waiting for Hyuntae to say something, anything.

What the fuck is wrong with your friends?

Okay, at least he’s not sulking and giving him the silent treatment.

Taehyung looked outside, leaning his head against the window.

Putting you in that kind of situation...they don’t know who that alpha is and they have you talking to him. And you’re at a party, the worst place to let something horrific happen. All he had to do was pump you full of alcohol, and you would’ve been putty in his hands. Where are your friends if he takes advantage of you, huh? I know, talking to other alphas and laughing and giggling like the dumbasses they are. They don’t care about you if they let something like that happen. I care about you a hundred times more than they do, and I’m glad I found you just in time. You should be thankful instead of pouting over there like a little baby.

Taehyung kept quiet, looking down at his phone; messages come in from his friends, one after another. He was about to open one of them until his phone, suddenly, is snatched out of his hand.

I’m sorry, am I interrupting something? I’m talking to you and you’re texting your friends? Do you know fucking rude that is? Hyuntae’s eyes flashed. Is that alpha asking about you?

Hyuntae opened his phone, his thumb tapping rapidly across the screen all the while looking up and down at the road. Taehyung watched closely, adam’s apple bobbing anxiously.

Hyuntae tossed the phone in the glove department, shutting it close with finality; Taehyung went to open the department. If you take your phone out of there, I won’t hesitate to throw it out the window.

Taehyung retracted his hand, folding his arms. Hot tears welled up in his eyes, his shoulders hunched at his ears.I’m sorry, okay? Please, Hyuntae, I’m sorry. His voice breaks and the first of his tears fall.

Why are you sorry? Are you sorry because I caught you talking to him with my own eyes, or are you sorry because you can’t have him? Tell me, Taehyung, was he more handsome than me? Did he smell better than me? Did you picture yourself underneath him? Tell me, did you want to leave me for him, where you two ride off into the goddamn sunset happily while you leave me in that apartment alone with my heart that you tore out of my chest and stomped on? Huh, Taehyung?

The accusations just make Taehyung cry harder, his breath coming out in short sobs, his surroundings blurry. He wasn’t flirting with the alpha, just talking, that’s all...or was he? Was he too close to him? How was he talking to him? How was he looking at him?

No, no, no! I don’t want to leave you, I don’t want to leave you! I want you! Taehyung gripped onto Hyuntae’s toned bicep and laid his face against it. Please, Hyuntae, please, I’m so sorry! I won’t do it again!

You won’t do what again? Hyuntae growled. I want to hear you say it.

Taehyung sniffed. I won’t talk to him or any other alpha again. I just...I just want you. I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you.

Taehyung rubbed his nose along Hyuntae’s sleeve, he was sure he was getting snot all over it, but he didn’t care. He just wanted to smell Hyuntae; he wanted his smoky scent to soothe him from his crying fit; he wanted to be held by him.

Hyuntae wrapped an arm around him, bringing him in close. Alright, I might just forgive you. No more talking to alphas.

Okay, Taehyung agreed. I promise.

He kept that promise, believe it or not.

If he needed directions somewhere, he asked a beta or omega. If he needed help at a department store and the only employee around was an alpha, he would leave the store and go to another, hoping to get what he needed. If he was walking around campus and an alpha attempted to talk to him, he would put his earbuds in, ensuring they would leave him alone. So, he had been keeping his word, and that made Hyuntae happy.

But with that promise came an unprecedented feeling he never had around alphas. Like he suddenly had a fear of them. Taehyung never had a bad relationship with an alpha; he was lucky to come across and be friends with thoughtful alphas back home. Now, he avoided them wherever he went. He observed them from the way they talk to their body language to see figure out their intentions. He felt paranoid around them; he felt like they were ogling him, drooling over the gorgeous omega next to them, which led to an extreme change in wardrobe: oversized hoodies and sweatpants, no more makeup, bangs hanging heavily over his eyes, anything that won’t make him look remotely as attractive as he has been told. He started taking his suppressants and scent blockers regularly than he ever has. The last thing he needed was to go into heat at the campus and a random alpha to follow him until he eventually overpowered him.

Trapped, forced on his knees, an alpha thrusting in him, violating him like garbage, him crying out not in pain, but pleasure as his omega keened a soft whine at the cock he needed and was finally getting. Him betraying Hyuntae’s trust and breaking the promise he solemnly swore.

No thank you. Won’t be happening.

His friends have noticed the change in him. While the four of them look like full-course meals, Taehyung was the slob of the group.

It’s just a new look I'm trying out.

I’m not feeling well today.

I just want to be comfortable.

Everything to excuse his new look, he would say just to get his friends off his back.

Another change he noticed was he was more...aggressive if you will. He would snap at the littlest things, things he would easily brush off before, like when he had a peer assignment. His partner called him that she couldn’t visit the library they planned to meet because just last minute, her omega surprised her with a trip to Jeju Island for a week. Now, the old Taehyung would’ve set a schedule up where they could talk about the assignment and the portions they’re doing until she came back while she still could enjoy her vacation. The new Taehyung, however, ripped her new one. How she was wasting his time, how he could find a better and worthy partner who wouldn’t shit all over him, and told her he hoped she got food poisoning while she was there. With one last, uttered go fuck yourself, he hung up.

He was even rude to his friends. He got tired of hearing the repetitive questions asking if he was okay, was everything at home okay, did he want to talk about whatever happened with Hyuntae. No, no, and no, it was none of their business!

But the meddling never stopped; they were still trying and figuring out what was wrong with him. Until one day...he snapped. Why did he snap? Because Minho said an unwarranted opinion of why Taehyung was the way he was. Hyuntae...of course, it was all Hyuntae’s fault. He was trying to control every aspect of his life; he was trying to isolate Taehyung to have him all to himself, he was destroying Taehyung’s life, and their friend was blind to the destruction. Naturally, Taehyung had to jump to his defense.

He’s not changing me! He cares about me! He just wants to protect me!

Have you looked yourself in the mirror lately? Minho threw his arms out. Everything about you is different. Your hair, your clothes, the way you carry yourself. Taehyung, you’ve been aggressive towards everyone lately and being plain rude. You’ve never been like that. I don’t even feel like I’m looking at my friend right now, maybe a mental patient that escaped from the psych ward.

Taehyung rolled his eyes. I’m still the same Taehyung. Hyuntae didn’t do anything to me; I did this to myself. I am who I am, and If you don’t like that, I don’t think we can be friends anymore.

He didn’t need them. I don’t think we can be friends anymore. He had Hyuntae. I don’t think we can be friends anymore. He would be okay.

That was the last time he spoke to them.

He evaded them everywhere he went. If he saw them coming his way, he would turn in the opposite direction, keeping his head down or turn down a different hall, despite if it took him longer to get to his class. That was all he did around campus; he kept his head down, not looking anyone in their eyes until it was time to go home.

One day, out of nowhere, he stopped going to college. Well, he physically stopped going. He just transitioned everything online; he could be home and alone, no one prying into his personal life. Hyuntae immediately agreed with the idea and encouraged it; he claimed he felt better knowing his omega was home and away from any preying alphas.

Did he find this option better?

Well, now that he’s home twenty-four/seven, he always had a feeling he was being constantly watched.

Whenever Hyuntae would ask him what he was doing, whether he was in class or painting, it didn’t come off as a genuine way of wanting to know what Taehyung was doing, it was more accusatory like he thought Taehyung was up to something. Who knew...probably thought he was talking to random alphas online.

He didn’t know when or how, but he stopped painting altogether. Concentration was difficult, both for an assignment and in his spare time. He didn’t have the desire to pick up his brush and squeeze the alluring colors of paint on his pad. He’ll sit and stare at the blank canvas until his eyes started seeing shapes of their own.

In the placement of painting, he found another outlet: YouTube. It gave him an escape from his life. He would sit eight hours straight in the bedroom...when he was supposed to be doing something important: cleaning, finishing assignments, or going to the bank. He would simply watch until he was numb, sometimes with a tub of ice cream, no misery anymore. On the plus side, he watched a lot of educational videos. And watched many babies sneeze and fall over.

He didn’t feel like going outside anymore, whether for grocery shopping or just a calm walk in the park, it didn't matter. His phone would persistently pang with messages from Hyuntae asking him where is he, what is he doing, and who is he with. The urge to throw his phone in the nearest river was too strong for him to overcome with every ping that grated his nerves.

But it got to him. It got to him until he didn’t go out anymore, he stayed in the confines of the apartment where he finally had the peace and quiet he wanted up until Hyuntae would come home.

He used to sit by the window and watched people walk up and down the street, enjoying the sun beating down on them and the fun they would have. Isolation made you want to eat all the time, just something to do. Taehyung enjoyed making home-cooked meals and saving recipes on Pinterest to make for himself and Hyuntae, but as he has discovered, Hyuntae is not that great at grocery shopping. Instead, he’ll buy pointless junk food and bottles of alcohol...no ingredients to make a proper dinner.

So what did he do?

Order from nearby restaurants. Fried chicken, pork ribs, tteokbokki, galbi-jjim, and many bowls of ramyun. Sat in front of the TV and gorging on his food, pathetically.

Even though he lived with Hyuntae, he’ll never forget the consuming loneliness.

He lost all of his friends, he didn’t call his family like he used to, he lost all of his support, especially Seojoon. It’s one of his biggest regrets letting go of a friend that easily, letting go of an incredible group like them. He should’ve seen it was nothing but the actions of a controlling, jealous, manipulative alpha who really did destroy his life.

Taehyung rubs his eyes, pinching his nose bridge. Water has gotten into his eyes-okay, tears, one trickles down his cheek with water from the shower. He feels a soft pair of lips press themselves along the span of his neck down to his shoulders. Jeongguk’s lips are soft and warm, taking him away from that devastating memory, taking him back to the present where he has gained friends, where he has the family he’s always wanted.

He interlaces his fingers with the hand rubbing along his belly, lightly moaning at the thumb toying with his popped-out navel.

Pregnancy has made him extremely sensitive in areas he never thought of. His belly button had never been one of those areas, but pregnancy changes that when it takes a new form. Now, Jeongguk is kissing along his collarbone and rolling his belly button between his thumb and index finger, and for a second, Taehyung thinks he might just come from that.

Taehyung forces himself to breathe evenly as Jeongguk uses his other hand to tweak his right nipple, gently plucking, rolling it between his fingers. Taehyung didn’t have “help” during his pregnancy with Yerim. He did invest in a dildo for those lonely, horny nights. But now, he’s blessed to have someone help him through those impulses.

The best thing about this is the steam augments Jeongguk’s scent. Pregnancy has made his scent appealing, giving Taehyung the urge to bare his neck for the alpha that has bred him. He gives in to what his body is telling him to do, inclining his neck. Jeongguk skims his nose along his neck, licking the mating mark.

He doesn’t get the chance to breathe. Jeongguk pulls him flush against his body until Taehyung feels his erection against his ass, and Taehyung, in response, feels slick trickle out and coat the folds of his cunt. Jeongguk growls in his ear. “You smell so good.”

“Ah,” Taehyung gasps. Jeongguk’s finger slides between his ass cheeks, his fingers coating with the warm, wet slick, slithering between the folds until Jeongguk finds what he’s looking for.

Admittedly, he feels more unsteady than he expected. Between the shower wall and Jeongguk’s hand on his hip, he could just collapse from the stimulation of it.

Jeongguk dips his finger in, and Taehyung covers his mouth, biting on the fleshy part of his finger. He leans heavily against the wall, staying as still as he could while Jeongguk circles his walls open, gathering the slick that runs past his labia. Jeongguk wets him and stretches him, adding another finger.

Two fingers, but it feels so thick, his knuckles dragging on Taehyung’s walls.

“You’re so wet,” Jeongguk whispers into his ear. “Let’s see if you can leak more for me.”

Taehyung grits his teeth. For God's sake, he’s dripping onto the floor, the water and slick going down the drain together in a translucent mess.

The two fingers curl onto the spot closet to his vaginal canal and the shocking stimulation gushes a pool of slick out of him.

It scared him that his cunt was able to gush out slick like that; it scared him so much that he nearly slipped if it weren’t for Jeongguk holding him up.

“It’s okay, you’re doing great,” Jeongguk praises him. “My beautiful omega.”

Taehyung moans lowly, hiccuping between cries.

“You’re so gorgeous pregnant. My beautiful omega, carrying my pup. You don’t know how that makes me feel.” Jeongguk’s teeth graze his mating mark, Jeongguk’s fingers scissoring him open thoroughly, and Taehyung’s embarrassed by the squelching sound his hole makes when he parts his fingers.

Jeongguk slowly pulls his fingers out, and Taehyung covers his eyes with a hand. He hasn’t turned around since Jeongguk’s stepped into the shower, he doesn’t know how aroused Jeongguk looks, but it has Jeongguk growling low in his throat and squeezing Taehyung’s tan ass.

“Turn around,” Jeongguk orders gruffly. “I want to see you.”

Taehyung does, looking into Jeongguk eyes. The alpha smiles softly, staring back. Jeongguk didn’t have a problem with staring. He lets his gaze sweep hungrily over Taehyung’s body before settling at his groin. Well, if he was staring...Taehyung let his eyes slide back to Jeongguk’s cock, heard Jeongguk give a soft huff of amusement, and he shifted his hips a little. His cock was hard and curved towards his right thigh, and his hair there was jet black, densely curled around the base of his cock.

“Did you trim?” Taehyung giggles. “Looks like you trimmed down there a bit.”

Jeongguk shushes him, stepping closer. “Just kiss me already.”

Before Taehyung could reply, Jeongguk leans in and kisses him.

Then there was more of them making out, and with his eyes shut tight and his mouth attached to Jeongguk’s, it was easier to let his hands roam. Jeongguk’s balls were soft. Oh, God, he shaved, he has come to discover. As soft as they were, they were hot where they sat heavily in his hand. Jeongguk made the most captivating whimper when Taehyung kneads them gently, so he did it again, Jeongguk moaning in his mouth.

Jeongguk shivers and he leans his forehead against Taehyung’s. “No.” Jeongguk’s lips tremble against his.

Jeongguk slicks himself, panting. “I want to have you on your back if you want. You’ll wrap your legs around me, and we can make out, and I can watch your face when you come.” He pauses, and his tongue flicks out to lick Taehyung’s earlobe. Taehyung shivered.

“Are we able to do that with the belly? It’s been a while.”

“Well, you can tell me to stop if it feels uncomfortable or if you feel any discomfort in your stomach.”

It got a little awkward when Jeongguk picks Taehyung and holds him by the back of his thighs against the shower wall; Jeongguk not seeming to know what to do now they’re in the position. He shifts Taehyung down a bit until Taehyung feels Jeongguk prod his rim.

“Well, Jeon? Get on with it.”

That was the best invitation Jeongguk likely ever gotten from him, the tip finally breaching in.

“Oh, Oh, God,” Jeongguk gasps, his nails sinking into Taehyung’s plump thighs. He pressed forward another inch or so.

Taehyung bites his lips, his hands gripping Jeongguk’s shoulders even if the pain lasts only a second. Taehyung’s body shook as he laughs softly. “Keep it down. Yerim, remember? All of us are not ready for the sex talk.”

“Hard to when you feel so tight.” Jeongguk presses forward slowly until he was all the way in, taking a second to let Taehyung get used to the stretching. Carefully, he slid out and back in, and Taehyung gives a low moan and clenches around the invading cock. Jeongguk grips his thighs tighter and starts a gentle, rocking rhythm.

A couple minutes of thrusting, Taehyung whines. “Can you do it harder?”

“I don’t want to hurt you,” Jeongguk says, breathlessly.

“I can handle it, really. Just do it harder.”

Jeongguk holds on to his thighs tighter, finding leverage to pull out and slam back in. Taehyung’s mouth falls open, a scream not escaping, but he chokes on it in his throat, and he pants. Yes! Jeongguk’s balls slap against his perineum, Taehyung leaking non-stop. He’s in euphoria right now. His cunt feels so good stretched by Jeongguk’s cock.

“More,” Taehyung whispers between them, clawing at Jeongguk’s back that he’s sure are leaving red scratches.

Jeongguk pants and snaps his hips forward so hard that Taehyung nearly slams the back of his head on the wall. “Like that?”

“Fuck yes, oh, yes, just like that!” Taehyung cries and pushes down to meet Jeongguk’s thrust.

They fall into a frantic, bruising rhythm. Taehyung was scratching and mewling, and he couldn’t hold back. He comes so hard he can’t breathe, shuddering through his orgasm. Jeongguk thrusts in a few more times, coming with a cry that sounded pain, lazily thrusting to finish. Jeongguk leans against Taehyung. How does this man still have the energy to hold him up.

Jeongguk kisses the tip of his nose. “You alright?” he whispers between them, letting Taehyung down delicately, letting him get his bearings.

“Mmhmm,” Taehyung grunts. “You?”

“I’m good.” He pets Taehyung’s head.

Jeongguk’s hand moves to his cheek, caressing the soft, plump skin. Taehyung nuzzles into his hand, purring softly under his breath.

“You’re all messy,” Jeongguk laughs, grabbing his washcloth to wipe Taehyung’s legs and inner thighs. He patiently waits as Jeongguk rubs a bar of soap in the washcloth until it froths up with suds.

He tenderly washes the cum off those areas, placing kisses everywhere he goes, many going to his belly.

Aftercare was something he and Jeongguk are adamant about every time they had sex. Jeongguk made sure he was always taken care of, that his head was still straight before they went on to do other activities or go to bed.

It was something he’s pleasantly gotten used to since he’s been with Jeongguk. He’s never had kisses peppered every inch of him, praises whispered to him on how well he did, getting foot massages, and wearing his alpha’s comfy shirts.

“We should get out.” Jeongguk squeezes out the rag, shutting the water off. “I think Yerim’s waiting up for us.”

Taehyung smiles at the mention of her. Knowing her, she might’ve already picked up her toys and ran to her parent’s room with her Octonaut plushie, snuggled underneath their blankets.

Taehyung looks over his shoulder as he dries himself off. “Well, let’s not keep her waiting.”

They throw on their pajamas, rubbing each other’s heads until the hair is damp enough to not leave their pillows soaking wet.

And that’s where they find her, underneath the covers with her Captain Barnacles plushy on her Eomma’s side of the bed.

“You stealing Eomma’s spot?” Taehyung tickles the girl’s side, both giggling as she moves to the middle of the bed.

He lies down next to her, his little girl curling around his belly while Jeongguk turns on the TV and searches for a movie.

His mind settles, softly breathing in the apple scent of his daughter’s hair, falling into tranquil peace for the night.

Taehyung found out he was pregnant when he was twenty-one, two and a half years of being with Hyuntae.

He didn’t think much of his symptoms, at first.

He felt bloated, but could it been the many nights he’s spent ordering way too much greasy take-out; he can’t remember the last time he had stood at the stove and cooked an actual meal. He did gain some weight, tried to cut down as he became the butt of Hyuntae’s fat jokes; he particularly didn't enjoy when the alpha jiggled his pudge and made pig sounds in his ear.

The dizziness was a surprise. He gotten out of bed and instantly had to grab hold of the dresser to keep from falling face first. The exhaustion was new; he can’t stay up the whole day without taking a four-hour nap. The frequent bathroom trips are too; he spent one-third of his day peeing.

He ordered Golden Olive fried chicken because he was too lazy to cook. Despite how hungry he was, the smell put him off, making him gag and dry heave into the kitchen sink. The only thing he was able to stomach that night was rice and pickled radishes.

Could be stress, could be depression for all he knows, he takes half an hour each day to listen to his jazz playlist, taking a warm bath where he should be relaxing, but the silence forced him to thumb through unwanted thoughts.

He made an effort to find ways to eliminate the stress his body is going through, taking reasonable one hour and a half long naps, he cuts down the time he spends on YouTube, recently taken up meditating, playing wind chimes in the back, and breathing softly. He tried to get back into painting for himself again; the most he could come up with was sweeping blacks and grays on the canvas, and he always felt a little better afterward.

Until Hyuntae came home.

Taehyung used to long for the moment Hyuntae would come straight home rather than hit the bars after work, then he quickly hated when Hyuntae would stay home with him. Hyuntae would be all over him, often trying to initiate scenting between them and rutting against his thigh, Hyuntae’s leather and tobacco scent heavy in the air, rushing out in waves and Taehyung’s lavender, subtle but muted. Taehyung tried not to complain no matter how much he wanted to wiggle out of the alpha’s arms, waiting for the moment he was released from the restraining arms so he could go scrub the scent off of him.

At some point, Taehyung thought to himself that his heat is around the corner if Hyuntae is staying home more than usual. He clicked on his heat app and saw his heat was approaching in a week, so maybe his hormones were fluctuating.

Only then the week is up, and he didn’t feel amorous in the slightest. He double-checked, and the pink circle around the original date mocked him. He decided to wait a few days, keeping the panic at bay, knowing irregularities are typical, especially for him, but it doesn’t come.

And that’s when he started worrying.

He bought the test around noon while Hyuntae was at the office. It was Friday-also the day Hyuntae and his entourage hit the bar near his father’s building. He threw in some other stuff, lip balm and deodorant, and half a liter of root beer. He attempted to ignore the look the cashier gave him when she scanned the test.

He didn’t wait. As soon as he stepped in, he tore through the light package, tossing everything aside.

He did his business and cushioned the test on a wad of toilet paper, carefully setting it down on the sink, washed his hands, and set a timer on his phone.

He rested against the bathtub, his legs splayed out in front of him as he poked around his stomach. His belly is still pudgy, but is it from food or his stomach expanding to accommodate the new life in him?

This is nothing but extra weight you’ve gained, a doubtful voice in his head told him.

It was stress; he tried to reason all the latest symptoms. His heat was just late; it had happened to him a couple of times before; it didn’t mean anything then, it doesn’t now.

They had never bothered with condoms, the only times being during his heats. The chances of getting pregnant outside of his heat are non-existent. But Hyuntae certainly hadn’t worried about it. He always was the one to talk Taehyung into going without the condom, claiming he loved going raw, feeling the warmth of Taehyung’s inner walls, feeling the tightness, everything.

So you do it if the risk was slim, right?

The timer ringed, blaring loud in the quiet bathroom. Taehyung startled badly, nearly kicking the cabinet as he scrambled from the floor to shut the timer off. His hand gripped the counter tightly, knuckles turning white.

It’s now or never.

He flipped the test over.

A small smiley face greeted him, bright and evident in the tiny window. Taehyung picked up the instructions he carelessly tossed aside, just to clarify if his meaning of the smiley face was correct.

It was. The smiley face sign meant positive. Positive meant he was pregnant. Pregnant meant he was going to have a baby.

The paper in his hands started to shake, every fiber of his being on fire, locked up and unable to move. His breath came out in short, pained bursts, his knees no longer able to bear his weight before he slowly sank down to the floor, the cold tiles chilling him through his sweatpants. He was closed to the floor, but it seemed strangely far away like he was viewing it through a tunnel.

He rested his head on the toilet lid, the coldness an appreciated distraction from the cacophony going on within him.

He was pregnant. He would have to take care of a tiny, helpless human being who would have to rely on him for their every need, and did he have to throw up?

Yeah, he did. He lifted up the toilet lid in time to empty out his lunch in there, gripping the sides firmly to keep himself from headbutting into the porcelain.

He fumbled for the handle, pushing it down with quivering fingers. He didn’t care if his face was in the trajectory of vomit and toilet water; he didn't care he looked like a hot mess, so he let his head lolled to the side and closed his eyes.

When he was a kid, he dreamed of being a parent, someone to care and nurture and love as his mom and halmeoni did to him, but, right now he regretted taking that test. Because maybe then he wouldn’t have to go through the motions of this immense change. He was still in school, for God’s sake! He wanted to graduate college, travel around some, hang his art up at the most prestigious galleries in Korea, get married, and then have babies.

This wasn’t how it was supposed to go.

This wasn’t how it was supposed to go. The timing was wrong; there was no planning involved with this whatsoever. Maybe the person wasn't the right choice to be the father? He always imagined Hyuntae to be the father of his children, so why didn’t the person who did this to him not feel right? Why didn’t he feel any pride in carrying his boyfriend’s pup?

Taehyung sucked in a large mouthful of air, exhaling with a sharp cry, his hand quickly coming to muffle his unraveling emotions.

He didn’t know how long he stayed there on the toilet, snot, and tears wetting his hand and sleeve. He didn’t know what time it was or how it looked outside.

He needed to get rid of this. Not the baby, the evidence of his recent finding. He would figure out the baby part later.

He threw the test in the trash bin, nervous fingers tying up the plastic bag into a tight knot and taking a minute to get his wobbly legs to stand up.

Taehyung ignored the bitter cold, pulling his hoodie up to his mouth as he walked to the side of the building. He was quick to throw the bag into the dumpster, the plastic deceptively light, at odds with the weight of the results they held. There was a long moment of silence as he stared at the dumpster.

A beat, two, three, four, five.

He blinked back into reality when he heard scraping, something being dragged along the asphalt.

A young woman around his age placed a huge pot of an aloe vera plant beside the dumpster, the leaves dry and brown.

What happened? Taehyung asked timidly.

Well, this was my housewarming gift, the woman started off. But I didn’t know you’re not supposed to give aloe vera too much water since they already hold some in their leaves, so…I gave up and decided just to throw the whole thing away.

But...can’t you revive it? Taehyung didn’t know why, but the woeful sight of the wilting plant made him sigh, surveying the damage. This plant needed care...it needed somewhere to grow, to thrive, to live.

The woman shrugged. Eh...I can just go buy another and not make the same mistake.

The woman went back inside, the door shutting behind her with a slam.

Soon, it got dark and Taehyung didn’t bother to turn on any of the lights.

One week. Taehyung made it a week without escaping into the infinite world of YouTube. But with what he found out today, he needed something to make him forget. That was how he ended up underneath the bedsheets, his eyes sucking up contents of cooking videos he had clicked through.

He checked the time on his phone, half-past nine o'clock. It had been that late? Had he been under here that long? He had to leave his safe haven eventually, to take a shower, eat something, if his stomach would allow it. He knew he had to eat something because of...the bundle of cells he was sharing his body with. He removed the blanket from over his head, switching on the lamp, blinking rapidly against the sudden brightness, sliding his way out of bed. He opened the door and went out to the living room. There wasn’t any movement; he didn’t hear anything. Should he be surprised, honestly?

There weren’t many choices in the fridge. Leftover fried chicken, some kimchi from a nearby restaurant, two cases of beer, and one carton of strawberries.

He managed to eat one drumstick before it came back up and went down the kitchen drain, his stomach clenching excruciatingly. The next option was strawberries; he didn’t think he could stomach kimchi after that.

He washed off some of the strawberries, pluck the stems, and cut them into halves. He popped out in his mouth and chewed cautiously, paper towel ready in hand to spit it out if it made him gag. When his stomach didn’t squeeze, he went ahead with another piece until he was halfway through his bowl.

He then remembered the bottle of root beer he bought was still sitting in the living room. Albeit warm, he still opened it and chugged some down, the fizz tickling his mouth and throat.

He took his warm shower, mostly just him standing motionlessly underneath the spray, his hand resting lightly on his stomach, conflicted about what his next move was.

He hadn’t taken any naps today.

He decided to turn in early.

He turned the lights off and pulled the blanket over his head, curling up into a warm ball.

Taehyung didn’t wake up again until half-past three o'clock. Bangs came from the living room, Taehyung freezing to listen to the intruder’s movements. Someone stumbled into his room, grumbling, and swearing. The smoky scent of a familiar person plus alcohol flooded heavily in the room into his nostrils.

He didn’t unearth himself from under the sheets. Hyuntae didn’t come over to pull the sheets back either. He wanted to be left alone when he was under the sheets, blocking out the outside world and Hyuntae. He heard Hyuntae clear his throat and turned on the sink for a few minutes before he felt the opposite side of the bed sank. He closed his eyes as the blanket lifted up briefly, and Hyuntae settled beside him.

He covered his nose when the arrays of scents that came off Hyuntae’s body assaulted his sense of smell, uneasiness bubbling low in his gut. Even with the smell of the Irish Springs bar soap, Taehyung could still pick out the scents of a bar. Alcohol, cigarettes, perfume...some unknown scents on Hyuntae, floral, sweet...omega scents.

He turned over and went back to sleep.

Taehyung went to the dumpster that morning and was glad to see the aloe vera plant still there. He took it with him inside. He cut off the rotten portions of the roots, left the plant in a dim area for three days, repotted with a potting mixture he made, left it alone for three more days, and gave it a nice drink of water.

The plant was not going to heal with the snap of his fingers. But with some TLC and a new environment, the plant will be back to its once beautiful self.

Taehyung left Hyuntae after a month of contemplating.

That whole month made him feel the worse, more so than before. Taehyung had cleverly disguised his morning sickness as the stomach flu, spending his time in bed to recuperate. Hyuntae used to tend to his needs when he was sick or in heat. Now, Hyuntae just leaves whenever, didn’t matter if he wasn't feeling well or needed someone to help him to the bathroom or, at the very least, checked on him to see if he was okay.

The one day he stayed home, Hyuntae made him ramyun. As much as he wanted to eat the noodles, the smell twisted his stomach, and he bunched up the blankets in front of his mouth, asking if he could get a bowl of pickled radishes. The request started a two-minute rant from Hyuntae about how ungrateful Taehyung was, how he spent all that time making something for him to throw it back in his face, mind you, ramen just takes about three minutes to cook. When he announced how Taehyung never appreciates the stuff he did for him and was going to throw the ramyun away, Taehyung sat up in bed and took the bowl, slurping up the noodles, forcing it down his throat, Hyuntae praising him with an amused glint in his eyes as he watched Taehyung gag on the noodles. Taehyung had to pay the price later by spending the afternoon on his knees before the toilet.

To apologize, he made Hyuntae breakfast, ordering in from a nearby Western breakfast place. Apple porridge for him and milk for him, pancakes, scrambled eggs with cheese, and bacon for Hyuntae. He proudly assorted the hot breakfast on a plate, setting it on the table when he heard Hyuntae bustling around in the bathroom.

He didn’t expect a kiss or a hug or anything in that matter, but he thought he would’ve gotten a thank you. He should have been prepared for the tense body staring down at breakfast, hands not moving to the fork and knife set next to the plate with a cup of steaming coffee nearby. He asked if Taehyung cooked the food himself. Taehyung thought it would be better, to be honest, and told him he ordered in from a restaurant.

So because your fat ass likes this garbage, you think everyone else will?

Fat ass. Fat ass. Fat ass. Fat ass. Fat ass.

It was too early in the morning to hear those words.

I’m still not feeling well.

Hyuntae didn’t care. He didn’t care if Taehyung’s stomach bubbled from the sight of food he once loved but now hated. He didn’t care if Taehyung had a pounding headache that he had to squint his eyes. He didn’t care if Taehyung can barely stand on his feet without holding on to the back of the chair.

If anything, he should’ve been prepared for the breakfast to be swiped off the table, Taehyung flinching and watching Hyuntae stomped out. He closely listened to the Omega can’t fucking do anything right underneath the alpha's breath.

He stared at the pancakes, the eggs, and bacon that spread messily around the hardwood floor, the plate that shattered upon impact, its jagged pieces decorating the floor gracefully like diamonds glittering in the sunlight, yet deadly if it went straight into your foot.

That’s when he started thinking. The thought of leaving had crossed his mind now and then, popping in whenever Hyuntae would call him a name, if Taehyung didn’t do something right to his expectations or if he ignored Taehyung the whole day because he went to the park to work on a peer assignment. Before he had the opportunity to act out, Hyuntae would do something kind as an apology, whether it was getting him a huge bouquet of flowers or new earrings or taking him out and spoiling him the whole night. The thought would suddenly vanish as though it was never there in the first place. He was overreacting too soon; his mind would tell him along those lines. Omegas are thought to be easily forgiving, and Taehyung played into the stereotype; only because he didn’t have an ounce of hate in him. Even now, staring at the ruined breakfast.

It was a lingering thought, not something he ever thought of actually doing.

On his hands and knees, he cleans up the food, staying away from the shards of glass by his leg. His shirt puffs out at the front, emphasizing the size of the shirt where he knows lies a little bump. He has yet not told Hyuntae about the baby, fearful of his reaction.

Would Hyuntae even want it? Would Hyuntae force him to get an abortion? What if he kept the baby, and Hyuntae ends up being jealous of the attention Taehyung gives it? What if Hyuntae does something like this to the baby? What if Hyuntae becomes worse than he already is? What kind of life would he give the baby if he stayed?

His eyes gazed at the glass, hand on his belly, that last question buzzing around his head. What if this is just one step closer to this getting physical? What if the next time, the plate ends up being thrown at his face?

That terrifying thought process, alone, pushed him.

And then it was Friday night: Hyuntae’s bar night. It was an out-of-body experience. Him throwing whatever he could take with him in a duffel bag, packing his debit card, throwing on light clothes, wrapping old newspaper around the aloe vera’s vase, and leaving his apartment key on the kitchen counter. He didn’t take his phone with him, something told him not to, but he had the most significant number saved in his conscience.

He didn’t look back.

Because what if he’s so consumed with guilt he turns back? What if the thought of Hyuntae in tears and destroying the apartment over him tore him up from the inside?

What if someone Hyuntae knows sees him? He kept his head low and his hood pulled over his head.

By some miracle, none of that happened as he arrived at his first destination: the ATM. He wasn’t sure what his Appa would say if he saw him withdrawing all the money he had on his card. He didn’t want to leave a track; as stupid as it may be, it was better to have cash on hand. He had enough to make it where he needed to go, between the little stint at the garden shop he worked at, the money from his Halmeoni that she gave here and there, and his rainy day jar. The machine spat out the wad of cash, and he placed it neatly in an envelope he took from Hyuntae’s desk.

His feet took him to the bus station and prayed that there was a bus leaving out of here anytime soon. He trailed a finger down the schedule, marking one down. 9:30 p.m. Thank you, God.

He went up to the desk and asked for a ticket to Seoul, the lady happily taking the cash from him; she was too upbeat for it to be this late. Next, food. He went to the mini convenience store with plans to buy a late dinner as his stomach felt better as of late, browsing the ramyun bowls and sandwiches. He grabs two bowls of spicy ramyun, a container of kimbap, two little containers of hard-boiled eggs, a can of soda, and a strawberry sandwich. His hunger was insatiable.

A little girl next to him whined and pulled on the sleeve of her mother, calling Eomma Eomma Eomma, her face smashed up to the display case full of fruit sandwiches, crying about how there was no more of the strawberry sandwiches.

Why don’t you get the one with kiwi and orange? Her mother crouched down to her level and pointed at one of the containers.

I don’t that want that one. The little girl shook her head, her mother looking around the shop for another snack for her daughter.

Taehyung looked at the container in his hand and the little girl’s pouting face. As much as he wanted and craved this sandwich...there were more options

Taehyung crouched to her level and held up the sandwich container. Here, you can have mine.

The mother resisted at first, telling Taehyung she can find something else for her daughter, but Taehyung insisted it was fine. The little girl gingerly took the container out of his hand, giving him a big smile, a gaping hole on the bottom where there used to be a tooth.

What do you say to the nice oppa? The mother prompted from her daughter.

The little girl hugged the container to her chest and peered up at Taehyung. Thank you, oppa.

Bye-bye. Taehyung waved at her.

The little girl waved back, blushing. Bye-bye.

Come on, Yerim, we don’t want to miss our bus. The mother grabs ahold of the little girl’s hand and walked to checkout, Taehyung behind them.

Taehyung couldn’t stop thinking about the cute little girl as he watched his ramyun bowl spin around in the microwave. Yerim Yerim Yerim. Such a beautiful name.

He picked a seat and gorged on his noodles, chopsticks picking up and slurping noodles at top speed and drinking down the broth, throwing the bowl away. He packed the rest of his food into the duffel bag.

Now that he filled his empty stomach, he looked around for a phone. He found one by the bathrooms, putting in coins through the slot. He picked the phone up and held it for a long moment, five four three two one, shaking himself out of his trance and put the number in.

It ringed a few times, then she picked up on the fourth ring. Hello? Who is this?

Taehyung didn’t answer, just taking the time to listen to her voice, her sweet, comforting voice.

Whoever this is, I’m about to to hang up.

Eomma, wait! he said hurriedly, bracing himself on the wall.

His mom’s breath hitched. Taehyungie?

Hi, Eomma.

Oh, Taehyungie.

Hi, Eomma. Through the phone, Taehyung could make out the wetness in her voice. Taehyung hugged his waist, hunching into himself. He pinched himself to keep the tears at bay, but the sound of his mom’s voice...the sound of home and love and warmth, a small whimper slipped out of his mouth, biting his lip.

When was the last time he talked to her without Hyuntae breathing down his neck? The last time he drove to the countryside to visit without Hyuntae’s permission or him changing plans last minute?

Your family’s against our love, did you not see how your Appa was staring at me? I care about you and your wellbeing more than your family ever did. Oh, I didn’t tell you, I was planning on us going to my parent’s lakehouse. Ring your eomma and tell her we can’t visit.

He never realized how much of his time he was spending with Hyuntae and just Hyuntae alone. Then, it got to a point where he was taking phone calls meant for Taehyung and telling whoever on the other line he was busy or couldn’t make it to an event because he made plans with his boyfriend.

Oh my God, I can’t believe I’m talking to you. It’s been, what, a year since we last heard or seen you? You know, Halmeoni’s been asking about you, and we didn’t know what to tell her; she’s been so worried about you. She nearly had a heart attack with how angry she got talking about your boyfriend, how she doesn’t have a good feeling from him, she doesn’t trust him, but you know Halmeoni, no one’s ever good enough for her grandkids. So, how have you been, sweetie? How’s Hyuntae?

Taehyung wept, biting his lip couldn’t muffle the sounds coming from his mouth forever. He knew his mom was going to hear him; he knew her maternal senses were going to get worked up. Is he going to have that kind of awareness, to know when or what is wrong with his child? Strong senses as good as his Eomma and Halmeoni develop with years of experience and practice.

Taehyung-ah? His mom called. Oh, Taehyungie, what’s wrong? Why are you crying?

Why is he crying? Maybe because he’s homesick. Maybe because he finally realized how detrimental Hyuntae was for him, his confidence, and his self-esteem. Maye because he has come to the realization of how much Hyuntae ruined his life. The veil has been lifted off of his eyes, and he saw what he didn’t last time; he has seen what everyone else had. Hyuntae was the villain, and everyone saw but him. This was the man he defended, the man he thought had only good intentions, the man he thought was trying to protect him, the man he thought was being a good alpha for his omega.

He ran through memories of hurtful words, shame and bitterness. He was blind to the behavior and came to think of them as normal and justified for a relationship.

But that was the thing. Hyuntae’s behavior wasn’t normal; it shouldn’t be looked at as an alpha looking out for his omega. It’s not normal for an alpha to ignore his omega for days because he decided to have a night out with his friends. It’s not normal for an alpha to play mind games and make his omega question his judgment. It’s not normal for an alpha to do “pop-ups” at places his omega frequented and say it was just coincidental that he was in the same area. It’s not normal for an alpha to tell his omega how fat he looked in front of friends and call him a whore because two top buttons of his shirt were opened. And yet, he stayed despite all of those examples.

He wondered what happened to the sweet, attentive alpha he fell for who became this selfish, manipulative, mean asshole. He should’ve known such a lovely and enchanting persona was merely a facade. Underneath the innocent, bashful smile, it was degrading words, unfulfilled promises, and other deceptive lies that landed him in the situation he was attempting to get out of now.

Why didn’t he see it?

Taehyung? His mom calling his name brought him back. Are you still there? What’s wrong?

There it is. Maternal senses were tingling, she knew. A little toddler standing on the seat in front of him knew, his big eyes staring at him curiously. What’s wrong with that man? Why’s he crying? Everyone knew; he felt eyes boring into his back as he tried to hide between the wall and the payphone. Oh, how pitiful that omega looked.

Eomma, do you remember when I was little, and I said I wanted to marry Appa? Do you remember what you told me?

Yes.

You told me to find someone just like Appa. Someone kind, hard-working, loving, caring, supporting, and every good quality a mate and father should have.

His mom stumbled over her words, confused. I...I...I thought things were...good between you two?

Well, they aren’t.

As many boxes Hyuntae crossed off in terms of being like his Appa, the boxes were unfortunately scratched out.

He cleared his throat. I just called you to tell you I’m leaving. He was skirting around the subject, but he was not quite ready to talk about what was going on behind closed doors.

Oh...mind if I ask where and why? His mother’s voice rose in pitch with the question.

He has never been able to lie to his mother, not even as small as a white lie because the truth comes out eventually. He has to do it just this once. Um...I’ll be going to Seoul...I just need a change in scenery.

Scenery?

Yeah. I’ve been wanting to go to the city.

There was so much to take in, tears falling with each blink. He waited for his mother to push for more information, but she didn’t. He mused on telling her about his...bundle of cells, but he then decided to wait until he settled down in Seoul. He’ll send her a picture of an ultrasound once he found a doctor and obtained a new phone.

9:30 for Seoul is boarding, 9:30 for Seoul is boarding.

Eomma, I gotta go, my bus is here.

Really? She sighs. Okay, just call me when you get settled in...do you know where you’re going to live? Do you have enough money? Seoul isn’t cheap, you know.

I have money, Eomma, I’ll be fine. I’ll call you when I've arrived.

She was going to worry regardless; her oldest son was traveling to a big city on his own with who knows much money on him. She’d probably worry about him arriving and having to sleep in a bus station or in a gas station bathroom until he had enough to get an apartment.

Bye, Eomma. I love you, he whispered into the phone.

He hears his mom sniffled, whimpering. I love you, too, Tae. Please, please, be safe.

He blows a kiss into the phone. He hung up, wiping tears from his eyes and cheeks. Once he looks presentable, he picked his stuff up, ticket in his hand.

He didn’t look back.

Taehyung wakes up heaving, drenched in sweat.

The scent of Jeongguk hits him first, the smell faint around the room. Yerim is still hugging onto his belly, Captain Barnacles lying by her head. Other sleepovers, Jeongguk would be wrapped around them possessively, but Jeongguk is underneath the covers, hair messy from tossing and turning.

He cups his belly, the baby sleeping alongside their sister. He combs Yerim’s hair back, the ends tangled. He knows he’s going to have to brush them out in the morning.

He rubs his eyes. The bedroom is pitch black with the streetlights coming in through the window, and as his sight adjusts, he registers the dryness of his mouth. Nothing out of place about it; he just woke up, and he’s overwhelmed from the dream...no, flashback.

He leaves a lingering kiss on Yerim’s warm forehead, gingerly removing her arm from his waist. She stretches her arms and turns over, snuggling into Jeongguk’s side. He clambers out of bed and shuffles through the dark to the kitchen, reminding him of those restless nights of waiting for Hyuntae to come home late from the bar. There was no point in him doing that when it would mean staying up until 3, 4 in the morning, and he had classes the next day. He turns on the lights before turning on the Keurig.

Most think him leaving would’ve been a great moment of triumph for him. But, it’s not what he experienced. Though he was being neglected emotionally, breaking up was utterly heartbreaking, leaving Taehyung feeling more than a little betrayed. This was a person who was supposed to love, protect, and look out for him. Unbelievable as it is, leaving made him feel guilty like he was the one in the wrong, which he knows he isn’t.

Months after, he would still jump at the sound of his phone ringing; sometimes, he thought Hyuntae found him and have full-on panic attacks until he was far from the area. It has faded over time, mainly because of the arrival of his newborn daughter.

“Guess it’s just you and me,” he whispers down to his belly, taking out a mug and teabag, leaving it underneath the stream where the boiling water will be coming from.

His skin is flushed, heat pulsing through his skin. He fans himself, blowing a breath between his lips. Turns on the sink to splash cold water on his face. The dream has him light-headed. He drums his fingers on the counter absentmindedly and looks out the window to give himself something to do.

A hundred miles away and he still found ways to screw with Taehyung’s head.

Why? Why him? Why can’t he leave him alone?

He startles when the machine dispenses the water into the mug, the herbal aroma of chamomile and steam wafting from the mug.

His eyes and jaws start to ache, his nail lightly scratching at a dried stain Jeongguk didn’t wipe.

He’s not going to cry.

He hates this, he didn’t want to cry. He promised himself he wouldn’t waste his tears for someone who doesn’t deserve them.

What is Hyuntae doing right now? Did he move on to another helpless victim? Did he fly into a rage when he saw the lone key sitting on the kitchen counter? Did he call Taehyung’s parents for information on their son’s whereabouts? Did Hyuntae endlessly hunt him down all over Daegu to realize Taehyung is nowhere near there?

He rests his arms on the counter, pushing his hair back in frustration. Don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry. He doesn’t listen to the voice; salty tears dribble down his cheeks and plop on the counter without his consent. He covers his mouth with both hands, not wanting Jeongguk, or even worse, Yerim hearing him because if he’s crying, then she’ll start crying.

He just bawls in the kitchen. Curling into himself, clutching his shirt in a desperate attempt to keep himself from having a meltdown.

Taehyung turns on Itaewon Class.

Watching the show reminds him of his first apartment and the bar/restaurant he used to work at.

The owners were an older beta couple that treated Taehyung like he was their own son. At the end of his shift, Minyoung, the wife, used to send him home with a warm bag of takeout of his choice, and Jaein, the husband, used to walk him home as his personal bodyguard. This time of night is when the freaky alphas come out.

Working at the restaurant was a fun job for him, despite the risks of being a heavily pregnant and unmarked omega. He’s had many passes happen, from alphas asking for his number in the most charming way possible to a regular who proposed to him and said he’ll take care of Taehyung and his baby, Minyoung had to shoo him out when Taehyung waddled to the back, mortified. And then, that one alpha who had way too many drinks pulled him on his lap, all the beverages and plates he was supposed to hand out falling off the tray. The alpha had his meaty hands all over Taehyung’s belly and dared to ask why he didn’t have a bite on his neck.

Long story short. That alpha wasn’t welcomed back, Jaein throwing him out on the street. But regardless, he still had a good time working there and bought Yerim to the place so Minyoung and Jaein could see her.

He hears a stair creak, taking a sip of his tea. “You know, you’re not that great at sneaking up on people.”

“Mmm,” is all Jeongguk says, coming around the couch and joins him. Jeongguk sets Taehyung’s feet in his lap, and Taehyung doesn’t protest; his ankles are sore. He brings a foot up to kiss his ankle. “I had to go looking for my omega because he wasn’t in bed with our pup and me.”

Taehyung lightly smiles. He knew Jeongguk was going to follow him downstairs, but he didn’t think it was going to take this long. Maybe because of Yerim asleep in bed with them, his alpha protecting the little pup next to him.

“I couldn’t go back to sleep,” is the explanation he comes up with.

“Why?” He inclines his head cutely. “Was this little guy keeping you up?” He sets his hand underneath his belly, pushing his palm in to get a reaction.

If only that was the reason. His throbbing headache was starting to go down, and his sinuses were still clogged, his nose making a disgusting gurgling sound with every sniffle.

Ever the patient one, Jeongguk’s fingers massage his neck, steadily soothing the tension held there until his head drops forward. Taehyung sits there and blinks the new onslaught of tears away. Oh, God, don’t do this in front of him. He brings himself to look away from the TV into Jeongguk’s doe eyes, eyes holding a genuine concern to assure his omega’s okay, who wants to fix whatever’s going on with him.

It’s difficult to hold it in when he’s looking at him with those big eyes. Will the baby have eyes like this? Eyes that make you cry just looking at them.

Here we go again. Jeongguk goes to cup Taehyung’s cheek in his palm, wipes the tears with his thumb.

“I thought I saw him at the park today,” he whimpers, gripping onto his mug so tight he’s afraid it may shatter in his hands.

Jeongguk lets out a growl, tightening his jaw to cut it off mid-way, peeking at the stairway. “Was he there? Did he see you?”

“No, no, it, it wasn’t him. I thought I smelled him, but it was only a lady smoking.”

Jeongguk hugs Taehyung’s head to his neck, breathing in his scent. “Thank God, I was about to run out of here and hunt him down so I can rip his head off.”

“Aw, Kookie.” Taehyung kisses his mating mark, nuzzling his nose into his neck.

Taehyung has been upfront and honest about the father of his child and who he is. As hard as it was talking about him, it was a huge weight taken off his chest.

He told Jeongguk once he grew comfortable with the alpha, opening up about his first real relationship and the mental scars it left behind. In the end, Jeongguk was seething, absolute fury in his eyes, the alpha in explicit detail explaining what he wanted to do to Hyuntae. All it took was an extended hugging and scenting session from Taehyung to silence the growling, snarling, and threats.

“I’m okay, I’m okay,” Taehyung muffles. “I just have to remember I’m safe and he’s gone from my life.”

Jeongguk rubs circles on his back and hums. He drags the blanket from the back of the couch over the both of them, and Taehyung snuggles into Jeongguk’s side as Yerim did. He’s so freaking warm.

“So is that the reason why you were so shaken up today?”

“Yeah,” Taehyung answers, fixing his position to lie back to chest. He intertwines his fingers with Jeongguk’s over his belly. “It threw me back a whole step. I don’t know how to describe it; when I smelled cigarettes, my body went into fight-or-flight mode, I wanted to run away, but I couldn’t. Every instinct in my body was screaming at me to go find Yerim and take her with me, but…” Taehyung shakes his head, turning his face towards Jeongguk’s neck.

“It’s okay, you were scared, happens to everyone,” Jeongguk makes a calming sound.

“But what if he was there? What if he saw Yerim and you? What if he saw me? I can’t help but think what would’ve happened. Someone like Hyuntae is good at twisting words around and making people see things from his perspective. I can already see it. I was cheating on him with you, I found I was pregnant, and we ran away, mated, had our little family, and lived happily ever after. Meanwhile, he’s the broken-hearted alpha who thinks his world ended when he found out the truth. The point is, we’re the bad guys. and he’s the almighty saint who could never do anything wrong.”

Taehyung frowns. He shouldn’t be thinking this negatively, but it’s something he can’t help. Taehyung firsthand knows the way Hyuntae’s mind works and what he would’ve done if the worst-case scenario did happen as he imagined.

Hyuntae is far away from him and can’t hurt him anymore, but he still does not much like the feeling of doubt. It always made him sick to the bottom of his stomach, and his chest hurt, hence why he couldn’t concentrate on his usual activities. The man cuddling him is not a manipulative individual nor has malicious intentions to make Taehyung feel so bad about himself that he’ll blindly do whatever he wants.

“Well, if he was really there, I would’ve made sure he didn’t come anywhere near you and Yerim. Because I know the whole story, you were brave enough to sit and talk to me, someone who around the time you just met. So, if fifty people at the park believe a word he says, you’ll have one person who knows he’s a lying piece of shit.”

Taehyung hums agreeably, closing his eyes.

“Did you ever regret leaving?”

Taehyung shrugs. “At first, I did. It was hard to leave someone I’ve fallen in love with regardless of how much he hurt me. Then I doubted my ability to be by myself in a whole new city and care for a new baby...because all I heard in my head was him. You need me, Taehyung. You wouldn’t last out there without me. You depend on me. And so many times, I believed him. I just wanted to get on the next bus back to Daegu and beg him for forgiveness for doing such a thing to him.”

He’s about to get himself worked up, so he takes a deep breath and continues. “But, then I thought, that’s what he wants. He wants me to think I can’t make it on my own unless he’s in my life. He wants me to fail. It was scary to see how much I depended on him. I had a panic attack as soon as I got off that bus. I wanted to get back on and just forget about everything. Suddenly, I felt like the money I had wasn’t enough to get a place, get food, buy necessities, buy baby stuff. All the confidence I had in myself just disappeared when I truly realized I was on my own.”

“But you had your mom and hyung,” Jeongguk says and Taehyung’s head jerks up.

“Yeah, but I told my mom not to send me anything, and she did anyway, said it was to get through my first month, and that’s all I allowed her to send. I wanted to do things without having to rely on my parents for help,” Taehyung explains. “And hyung insisted, you know him. When we first met, I thought he was some macho alpha wanting to get with me like all the others. Every time he came, he tipped me and did this stupid smirk at me when I come by. One time, he left before I could give back the money. And he did it the next time, too, and that time I was able to say something to him.”

Who knew that was how he was going to meet his best friend?

Taehyung remembered telling Seokjin off and throwing the folded bills back on the table, saying he didn’t appreciate some alpha showboating like he’s the fucking king of Seoul, and throwing his money around was not going to have Taehyung riding his dick any time soon. Telling someone off was never his forte, the new aggression he carried with him something he wasn’t used to, alphas being the main ones to make him go off.

“So, when did you find out he was really a beta?”

“Well, when I was done, he told me. He told me he wasn’t tipping me trying to show off or get in my pants, but because he genuinely liked me as a waiter and the service.” From that point on, their friendship blossomed. Seokjin drove him to his appointments, going along with him for baby shopping, being his eating buddy, to having enough trust to leave Yerim with him.

“Honestly, Yerim saved my life,” he whispers. “If it wasn’t for her, leaving would’ve never crossed my mind.”

Jeongguk hums, kissing the top of his head.

“Around the time, she was nothing but a tiny cell, sixteen cells, I think, but I cared about those sixteen cells. I couldn’t stop thinking about the life I was giving those sixteen cells and what kind of a parent Hyuntae would be to those cells. I did think about staying and hoping a baby would change Hyuntae. But a baby wasn’t going to change his ways because he doesn’t care about anyone but himself,” he scoffs. “How stupid was I to think that? Sometimes, I think of what our lives would be like if I stayed, and I know now, it wouldn’t have worked out. If I stayed, Jeongguk, I would’ve been a horrible mother, seriously.”

“What? Now, why would you go thinking something like that?” Jeongguk hugs him by the waist. “You’re a great mother, the best.”

“Don’t lie to me, Kook,” Taehyung insisted. “If I had stayed if I didn’t have that bit of courage in me, what would’ve happened? Yerim wouldn’t have any contact with family because Hyuntae cut me off from mine. Not to bash them, but his family is the worst. Imagine having a traditionalist grandfather who would tell you your only purpose in life is to serve your alpha, a grandmother that will crush your self-esteem to dust, and don’t even get me started on his brothers and sisters. Hyuntae might use Yerim as a pawn if I don’t do anything he says and find ways to control her. What if he talks to her the way he talks to me? What if I just stand by like a damn coward while he insults her because I don’t want his attention on me for butting in? I’m sorry, Jeongguk, but...six years ago, I was the biggest nervous wreck ever. That nervous wreck wouldn’t be able to be the mother that his daughter needs.”

Taehyung sniffles, tasting salt as he licks his lips.

“Tae, I’m not lying to you when I say you’re a great mother. You were a great mother before Yerim was even born. You made a huge sacrifice for her, you completely started a new life, knowing how tough it was going to be, but you did it for her. Trust and believe, you did the right thing for Yerim and yourself. You’re right about one thing, Yerim wouldn’t have thrived in a toxic environment like that. A little girl constantly seeing her Appa insult her Eomma every day wouldn’t be good for her. What if she took that as an example of what a relationship is supposed to be? What if she thinks her alpha, omega, beta, whoever she loves, treated her like that, and she thinks it’s okay?”

He would’ve ruined his daughter’s view of a healthy and loving relationship. A cycle of abuse would’ve started. His stomach twists itself in knots at the thought of someone taking advantage of his precious baby girl. It would’ve been all his fault. He’s supposed to set an example for his daughter, be her role model. What kind of example would he be setting if he lets his daughter hear her Appa call her Eomma a whore, slut, fatass? He would be setting her up for misery, that’s what.

“Here.” Jeongguk directs his mug of tea to his mouth, the smell and taste bringing him back down into the safety of Jeongguk’s arms. “You are a great mother. Yerim is so lucky to have an Eomma that loves her as you do.”

Taehyung sighs into his mug, reaching to the coffee table for a tissue to blow his nose in.

“And this little guy.” Jeongguk palms Taehyung’s belly. “Is lucky to have you, as well. You are taking such good care of him. You eat all your fruits and vegetables, drink all of your tea, you do yoga and meditate, you take all of your vitamins, you go to your check-ups, you’re doing a great job.” Jeongguk’s voice goes two octaves higher. “Thank you, Eomma, for taking care of me. I’m all nice and cozy in here because of you. I love you, Eomma.”

“Kook,” Taehyung whines. “I’m trying to stop crying.”

Jeongguk lays a fat, wet kiss on Taehyung’s cheek, just enough to make him laugh and squirm in his grip. Taehyung is reminded, in moments such as these, how happy he is to have this alpha.

“You know, if it wasn’t for Yerim, we would’ve never met,” Jeongguk smiles.

Taehyung chuckles. “Yeah, who knew me losing my toddler in the mall during the holiday season would’ve led to an alpha finding and returning her to her Eomma?”

“And remember how hyung accused me of kidnapping and socked me in the face?”

“It wasn’t really a punch to the face, more like a slap. You didn’t bruise, just a large, red patch on your face,” Taehyung cackles.

Taehyung wanted to take Yerim to go see Santa and get some pictures of her with him. Yerim, new to walking on her wobbly legs, wanted to be put down and walk alongside her Eomma. One second, he swears, he turned away for one second, and she was gone. After that, it was a frenzy, as Seokjin described it. Taehyung ran around the mall and screamed his daughter’s name, snarling at mall security that came near him as his sour scent made mall pedestrians avoid him. An hour of panic, fear that someone kidnapped his precious baby, a tall alpha handed his baby to him, saying he found her by the candy store, crying.

He thanked the alpha with tears and a hug, assaulting his baby’s face with kisses until Seokjin hit the alpha in the face. One way or another, Taehyung dragged Seokjin out of the mall to avoid being arrested.

“Eomma? Appa?”

Naturally, Taehyung looks around for the scared voice. He sees Yerim coming down the stairs, clutching her plushy to her chest as she jumps off the last step.

“Come here, baby.” Taehyung opens his arms, inviting his daughter in for a cuddle. Yerim climbs on the couch and squeezes herself between her parents to snuggle in her Eomma’s arms.

“Where were you?” She asks with a cute pout reminiscent of Taehyung's.

“We were only down here, we didn’t leave you,” Jeongguk answers.

“But I was in bed by myself, and it was really dark, and you and Eomma weren’t with me. I thought you disappeared forever!” Yerim exclaims, smushing her face against Taehyung’s chest.

“Eomma and Appa aren’t going nowhere, we promise,” Taehyung noses his daughter’s hair and scents her, rubbing her back in soothing circles. “You’re okay.”

Back when Yerim was a baby, and he had to work to keep a roof over their head, a lady in Seoul named Jung Sooyoung had the talent to replicate the scents of loved ones. Taehyung went to her, and amazingly, she duplicated his lavender scent to a T. He had Seokjin smell it, and the beta did a double-take when smelling the vial. So, whenever Taehyung was away at work, and Yerim was starting to get fussy because she was missing him, all Seokjin had to do was rub some of the oil on his neck and rest Yerim’s face on his neck to calm her down.

Six years later, she still loves being held in her Eomma’s arms, his scent surrounding her in a bubble of solace.

Yerim hums contentedly, tucking her face near his scent gland, clutching onto his shirt collar.

“See?” Jeongguk gestures at them. “Would a bad mother cuddle his daughter and scent her because she was scared when she woke up?”

No, he wouldn’t.

It comes naturally to him to do this. His baby is upset; his instincts tell him to comfort her, to hug her tight to his body, kiss her all over the face, scent her, tell her it’ll be okay.

Would a good mother follow his every instinct to ensure his child is safe and happy?

On bad days such as today, Taehyung asks himself this. His omega answers, wagging his tail at the mention of his pups. He keeps the answer to himself.

Taehyung holds onto his daughter, her legs thrown over his hip and nearly on top of his belly.

He adjusts himself on the bed to get comfortable without having to move his daughter from the contact she needed. He kisses her little hand and sets it above his heart.

His appointment with the therapist is for twelve in the afternoon. Taehyung and Jeongguk arrive at the desk before then, and the receptionist gestures them to the waiting room.

It’s a neutral place. Gray carpeting, white walls, an abstract painting. There are magazines lining the coffee table about dealing with mental health, mental health in media, the biology behind anxiety and depression.

The doctor is a beta woman, as betas are known for their calm demeanor in relation to the profession of psychology. He walks into the room, Jeongguk giving him a quick kiss and shuts the door behind him with an annyeonghaseyo.

The doctor says annyeonghaseyo back.

He sits down in the armchair opposite the doctor’s and she strikes up a conversation with Taehyung about miscellaneous things, his daughter and the new baby, his art as she positions her notepad and clicks her pen.

“So, how are you feeling, Taehyung?” The doctor asks. It’s a procedural question, one she has to ask Taehyung at every appointment to gauge what week he has had. “You seem kind of off today.”

It’s one of the things he hates and likes about this woman, that just by looking at him, she can tell something is going on within his mind.

“I had a little setback this week,” Taehyung answers plainly.

The doctor nods, encouraging him to continue.

“Jeongguk and I took Yerim to the park, we were chasing her around, and I grew tired, so I went looking for a bench just to sit for a couple of minutes. Then...I smelled cigarettes. I thought he was there, I thought he found me. I looked around the whole park, and it was like the more I was looking, the more panicked I was getting because I didn’t want him to see me, and I really don’t want him anywhere near Yerim. But, he wasn’t there, it was some lady smoking. Even after realizing he wasn’t there, I ended up having a panic attack at the park.”

“Did you use the techniques we’ve practiced?” The doctor scribbles on her notepad.

Taehyung licks his lips. “I...I don’t know, I don’t think so, it was just so much going on, I couldn’t think. But, my husband and daughter brought me out of it.”

“Okay. Did this incident affect your day in any way?”

“Everything was thrown off. I couldn’t focus on anything, the whole day I was in my head and reliving those memories. It felt like my head was stuffed with cotton, I couldn’t think straight. My husband noticed and had been asking, but I was brushing him off, telling him nothing was wrong until I had a dream.”

The doctor hums, scribbling something on her notepad. “Was it another nightmare?”

“No, like a flashback. The night I left him.” Taehyung’s hands clutch onto the cushion of the armchair.

“How would you describe your feelings when you had to relive that memory?”

“Um…” Taehyung looks around the room. “I know you told me I shouldn’t feel bad about this, but I felt some regret. I do feel bad about having regret because he wasn’t good for me and yet, I was ready to go back to our apartment because I didn’t want to break his heart.”

“And we’ve discussed that’s what he wanted. It was what he thought he needed to do to keep control of your relationship. He knows you’re a kind-hearted individual, hence why you were the perfect target for him to sniff out and sink his claws into. Now, I know you’ve told me he has never hurt you physically nor sexually, neither has he ever threaten to hurt himself in a way to manipulate you into staying with him, but he knew enough of what drastic things to say and do to keep you by his side, no matter what. He didn’t care if he pushed your friends and family away from you, he didn’t care if he distorted your view of the world so that you listen to him, he didn’t care that you changed into the worst of yourself. This man did not care what he had to do to keep the control he had over you.”

“I just don’t like having reminders of him because I’m happy. That’s all I’ve wanted since I came here. I’m happy where I am. I have my daughter, I met an amazing alpha and mated him, and we’re having a baby on the way. I don’t need him ruining what I have, even if he is a hundred miles away from me. I just…”

Taehyung voice breaks, weak and splintered. The doctor holds out a tissue box for him. He grabs some and wipes some of the slowly dribbling tears.

“Taehyung-ssi, I would love anything more than to help you forget about that man and what he did to you, but I can’t. That’s the unfortunate thing about trauma, you will do anything to forget the experience, but our brains won’t allow it. It’s reflected in your thoughts and dreams. The only thing I can do is help you work through this, which is what we have been doing.”

Taehyung dabs at his eyes, wanting to curl up in the chair like when he first came here, but his belly takes up some space on his lap.

“You know,” the doctor starts. “You’ve changed a lot since the first time we’ve met. I remember you were this withdrawn, closed-off, angry man. And I wondered why is this omega carrying so much anger in him? What has he been through? It wasn’t until we talked that I realized the anger isn’t a part of you; it never was until you met him. He’s judged you and made you doubt yourself and the people around you that you built a defensive wall around to prevent getting hurt again. You were this boy that thought if you left Daegu as a whole, then that part of your life would’ve been forgotten, would’ve been long behind you. But it wasn’t. It followed you all the way here, festering in your mind until you sat in that chair across me.”

Taehyung remembered every appointment, from him straight up just not talking to the therapist to the one time he lashed out at her that he was fine and didn’t need to talk to anyone to when he let the wall that she described crumble and let the flood of emotions out. It was the hardest thing he done, but it was the best thing he did for himself. He doesn’t even want to imagine what he would’ve been like if he didn’t talk to someone, all that anger and rage in every vessel within him, pushing everyone away so they wouldn’t hurt him first.

Taehyung remembered every appointment, from him straight up just not talking to the therapist to the one time he lashed out at her that he was fine and didn’t need to talk to anyone to when he let that wall crumble and let the flood of emotions rush out. It was the hardest thing he has done, but it was the best thing he has done for himself. He doesn’t even want to imagine what he would’ve been like if he didn’t talk to someone. All that anger and rage in every vessel within him, pushing everyone away so they wouldn’t hurt him first.

But overall, he has come a long way. He’s open to his emotions and is forthcoming to other people, not having to analyze them to see if they were trustworthy individuals.

“Remember who you did this for,” the doctor reminds him. “Think about the little girl you did all of this for.”

The doctor looks through her notes, and they bow to each other when the appointment ends. He feels a whole lot better, light on his feet. He comes face-to-face with his alpha, the man taking hold of his hand and asking him about the appointment as they walk to the car to get back home to his daughter.

No, their daughter.

The drive home is short. They ride smoothly through every green light. Green leaves flutter in the light wind, the radio playing Suran quietly. Taehyung already made a plan to FaceTime his family just to check in on them, give Yerim the chance to talk to her grandparents, and tell his Eomma about the setback he had.

They stepped up into their living room, and Yerim runs to them, her ears picking up the sound of the door unlocking. Her arms hug around his wide waist, and her hair is in two low, neat space buns, her Pororo onesie snug on her tiny frame. He looks at the coffee table, an opened coloring book and crayons strewn all over the top. Moana plays on the TV, the water returning Moana onto her sailboat every time Maui threw her off it.

Remember who you did this for. Taehyung hears the doctor repeat in his head, and warmth feels his stomach and chest. That smile with the one tooth missing, those big eyes looking at him with love, simply because she missed him so much even though he was only ten minutes away. She bounces on her sock-covered feet because she wants to show him something she probably drew or curl up on the couch with him and watch the movie.

Taehyung grins at her happiness. “Did Uncle Jinnie do your hair?” Taehyung bobbles the two buns, making her laugh as she attempts to remove his hands from her neat bands. “He made you look so pretty.”

“Yeah! He said my hair was a mess.” She runs over to Jeongguk, the alpha picking her up and her hugging around his neck.

“Oh, did he now?” He cocks an eyebrow at the man coming out the kitchen, the beta’s hands set on his hips. “My daughter’s hair was a mess?”

“You knew it was a mess when you gave her to me. There was a lot of detangling and crying until I did that to her hair.” Seokjin kisses her cheek. He pats Taehyung’s stomach. “How’s my nephew ?”

“ They’re fine; they were quiet all day until I came here. I don’t have an appointment for another two weeks; you and Yoongi will get your copies,” Taehyung grunts as he sits on the couch.

“How are you feeling?” Seokjin’s tone changes, from teasing to serious, a distress crease in his eyebrows.

Seokjin knows him. He’s known him since he first arrived here. He knows when Taehyung has had a bad day. He knows when Taehyung spends too much time in his head that everything fades into the background.

Taehyung swallows. “I’m fine, hyung.”

“Are you super-focused?” Seokjin puts his hands up alongside his eyes and waves them back and forth, his eyes squinted. “You’re here right now?”

“I’m all here right now.”

“Because if I need to stay the night and help out, I will. Yoongi won’t mind.” Seokjin’s eyes around Taehyung’s face, gauging his reaction. “Just to help with the load.”

Taehyung huffs. “I’m alright, hyung. There’s no need to do, I’m okay.”

Seokjin nods, heading back to the kitchen. Jeongguk sits next to Taehyung, sitting Yerim in his lap. The little girl curls up against Jeongguk, her eyes intently watching her beloved movie.

Jeongguk throws an arm around Taehyung and brings him close to their cuddling session, Jeongguk burying his nose in Taehyung’s hair. It’s been an odd two days, his mind and body familiarizing themselves with the normalcy of where he is today and the intimacy Jeongguk’s bestowing on him.

Engrossed by the ships full of Kakamora sailing for Moana and Maui’s boat, Taehyung caresses Jeongguk’s mating mark, lightly scratching the indentations with his nails. “I called the midwife about the birthing plan. She’s on the board with letting you announce the gender.”

Jeongguk pulls back to look at him. “I can?”

Taehyung nods. “Yeah.” Just one word, but at the end, it morphs into a sob, and he can’t help it, the dams open, and he can’t stop it. He’s here right now in his husband’s arms, their daughter watching her favorite movie and discussing plans for their new baby.

Jeongguk pulls him up until he’s almost on top of Yerim and him, Taehyung stuffing his face between his neck and cushion. He distinctively hears Yerim make a confusing sound before he feels her hand run through his hair, just like what he does for her when she cries.

“It’s okay, you’re alright. Everything’s fine, you’re fine, we’re fine,” Jeongguk whispers.

“What happened?” Seokjin mutters, setting whatever glass thing he has on the coffee table.

“He’s just letting everything out.” Jeongguk kisses the crown of his head. “Oh, my babies. We’re okay, Eomma’s okay.”

“Well, if you need anything, Taehyung, I got you. You can hug up with your hubby and daughter, and I’ll do everything I can to make sure my friend flourishes.” Seokjin climbs onto the couch, squeezing in behind Taehyung to hug his waist.

“Hyung,” Taehyung groans, squirming to get comfortable with his belly and a grown man crushing his lower extremities.

“I wanna join in the cuddle pile,” Seokjin pouts. “Uncle Jinnie deserves to be in the pile, right, Yeye?”

“Yeah!” Yerim moves her other hand to Seokjin’s hair, mussing up his bangs as she pushes his hair back.

Taehyung laughs, wiping his misty eyes. Taehyung looks around the pile and absorbs the moment he’s in, the people he’s snuggling with, the people who have helped him through everything to get him here. He deserves this. Yerim deserves this.

Remember who you’re doing this for.

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