batfamgalore - Tumblr blog

[batfamgalore]

I could be wrong, but I thought the new wayne family adventures webtoon was supposed to come out the 21st? Does anyone know about it?

[batfamgalore]

*Jason accidentally knocks out Dick with the Batmobile. Tim and Jason run to help him as he’s laying on the ground*

Jason: What the fuck is he playing at now?

Tim: You knocked him out, Jason.

Jason: I wasn’t even driving! Only Dick could manage to get himself run over by a stationary fucking van.

Tim: Is he dead?

Damian: Of course he’s not. He’s fine.

Jason: Dick… Dick? Dick. Dick? Dick!

Tim: Right, well, that’s not working!

[batfamgalore]

*The batkids get into some drama as civilians and Bruce has to come play dumb and save them*

Citizen: I’m calling the police.

Bruce: Listen, I’m not going to make excuses for these kids, but… life has dealt them a cruel hand, and they’re living with a very serious condition.

*they all try to look sad and play dumb*

Bruce: Truth is, sir, they’re from Gotham.

Citizen: Oh, God. Well that’s punishment enough, I suppose.

Bruce: Quite.

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Jason: Have a great day, everyone.

Bruce: What are you in such a good mood about?

Jason: Just, you know, life.

Bruce: You’re up to something and I’ll get to the bottom of it.

[batfamgalore]

*Alfred is reminding Bruce to go to a school seminar for Damian that’s about helping the development of kids behavior*

Bruce: I don’t know why I have to go to this thing. In case you’ve forgotten I’ve raised a few kids.

*Cut to Jason pulling Dick’s hair and Dick poking Jason trying to escape. Tim, Steph, Cass, and Duke stare at Bruce*

Bruce: Why look at me? It was Alfred’s fault. I was barely around!

[batfamgalore]

*Dick is Batman but he’s gone missing and they’re trying not to assume the worst but Damian is already trying to pick out the next Batman*

Tim: He’s not dead, Damian.

Damian: Well, not yet.

*glares*

Damian: Hopefully, he won’t, you know, die, but if he does, the show must go on.

Damian: Isn’t that right, Jason?

Jason: You terrify me.

[batfamgalore]

Bruce: Once Alfred and I are gone, Dick will be in command.

Dick: Dick in charge! No look high five. Whoo!

*holds out hand and hits Bruce’s ear*

Dick: That’s not your hand. Wait. Is that a healed over earring hole? Do you have a scandalous past?

Bruce: I was stabbed while out on patrol. The scar extends through the lobe and into the neck.

Dick: No one likes it when you do that.

[batfamgalore]

*Dick, Jason, Tim, and Roy are trying to get information out of a criminal but none of them are in their uniforms*

Jason: Okay, man, now what we’re gonna play is a little game called “damn good chance you’re getting shot”.

*Jason pulls out a revolver and spins it*

Roy: Tuck the shooter, Jason.

Jason: Tuck it? This is how I do it, man.

Roy: I know this is how you do it, but this is not the time to do it how you do it.

Jason: I ain’t tucking her (the gun) once she’s out.

Roy: Tuck it, Jason!

*Dick and Tim watching from afar*

Tim: Should we step in?

Dick: Just a little tiff, Tim. Besides there’s no bullets in that gun.

Tim: How sure are you?

Dick: One in six chance.

Tim: Those are the exact odds.

[batfamgalore]

*All the batboys have plans to see a concert in Gotham, but there’s an Arkham break out so now all hands are on deck*

Jason: Oh, great.

Tim: I hate my life.

Bruce: Look, guys, I know how much you were looking forward to seeing that show. But there will be other concerts.

Dick: No, there won’t. The fact that this one’s happening is a miracle. Nobody good ever comes here because we keep killing each other.

[batfamgalore]

*trying to come up with a plan and Jason suggests giving a civilian sleeping pills*

Jason: So? Drugging people isn’t a crime.

Dick: You have a very loose grasp of the law, Jason.

[batfamgalore]

*Batbros on a road trip and halfway through they open the trunk to get a bag and find a random man in there*

Tim: Oh my god.

Jason: Whoah.

Dick: Did you not put him in there, Damian?

Damian: No, I did not.

[batfamgalore]

*Wally and Donna are so confident that they’ll beat Dick and Roy to a crime scene but then they show up and find out they’re already there*

Wally: Not gonna sugarcoat this for you. This is a tough moment for us, Donna.

Donna: Yes, it is.

[batfamgalore]

Anyone have any book recommendations that remind you of dick Grayson/batfam? Looking for some new books!

[batfamgalore]

*Batbros on a case*

Dick: Our killer is targeting a -holes. Think about it, he’s cleaning up the city one a-hole at a time.

*Dick and Jason exchange a knowing look*

Jason: By the way I gotta make a phone call. I know someone who’s in grave danger.

*calls Bruce*

[batfamgalore]

*Wally is trying to convince Dick that a random death is actually a murder but there’s absolutely no evidence showing that*

Wally: Come here, man. Find me a clue. Find me a clue right now.

*Dick picks up a long piece of paper with a ton of random names and numbers*

Dick: Oh, my god.

Wally: What?

Dick: I’m so bored.

[batfamgalore]

Tim: All right, check out this bad boy.

*opens big new computer*

Tim: Twelve megabytes of RAM, 500 megabyte hard drive. Built in spreadsheet capabilities and a modem that transmits at over 28,000 BPS.

Steph: Wow. What are you gonna use it for?

Tim: Games and stuff.

[batfamgalore]

*Dick witnesses a house get robbed and Bruce wants in on the case so Dick takes him to show him the house*

Bruce: All right, which one?

Dick: That one.

Bruce: Yeah? Well that’s a stupid house to rob.

Dick: Does anyone live up to your standards? Maybe we can get a hold of the burglar’s number. You can call. Tell him how disappointed you are.