01290111 - Tumblr blog

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the love that we deserve

We all deserve the kind of love that stays no matter what, the kind of love that will live through even in the darkest days, the kind of love that will save us from chaos, the kind of love that will always stick with us after everything that we’ve been through.

The love that speaks volumes without saying any words at all. The love that will understand difference of love and infatuation. We deserve a kind of love that is powerful yet so soft.

We all deserve the kind of love that will shower us with hugs and kisses, with faithfulness and care, the kind of love that will not be measured by the materialistic happiness.

We all deserve the kind of love that will be there through our ups and downs. The kind of love that listens. The kind of love that let’s us enjoy things. The kind of love that let us be our true selves.

The kind of love that will make non-believers believe, and the kind of love that will make the mind of pessimists believe that something good might happen, that there will be happy endings at the end of a chaotic story.

And Lastly, We all deserve the kind of love that feels like home, the kind of love like wearing a fuzzy socks in the cold night, the kind of love that is warm, like the blanket that keeps you safe at night, the kind of love that is kind, the kind of love that will fill the living room with laughter and the bedroom with full of unheard stories that you two will only know, the kind of love that protects, the kind of love that everyone fantasized about, that everyone thinks isn’t true. We deserve it! We all deserve it.

We all crave for that one true love, lovers will come and go, we hurt, we break, but we heal, we get up, and we learn. 

Until then, never settle for a love that is less than what you deserve. It will take time, but promise, when you found that one true love it will all be worth it. And once you found that person never let him go, because true love is rare nowadays.

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to the guy im going to love next

To the guy i'm going to love next,

Thank you for coming into my life, thank you for loving me when i thought i don't deserve to be loved, thank you for fixing my broken heart, But you see, i won't be the same anymore, I'm sorry if i cannot give you the same kind of love that i gave to my previous lover, For the reason that i'm still hurt and in pain, There are still a lot of tiny broken pieces of my heart that needed to be fixed, But please don't blame yourself, Because it's me at the first place, I'm sorry if im going to hurt your feelings, I'm sorry if ever i made you feel like shit because i'm still broken over the guy that broke me. I'm sorry if i accepted you way too early, I'm truly sorry if ever you're going through a hard time because of me.

But, please don't get tired of me, It sounds selfish, but please try to understand me. It will take time. But slowly i know that time will heal all the wounds. 

Don't worry, once that i'm fully over him, i'm all yours. My attention, my love, my care, everything that i have will all be yours. I will be dedicated to you. I will be yours, and yours only.

I'm sorry if it took me long to trust you, I'm sorry if it took me too long to give you back the love that you deserve. 

And a final message to the guy that i'm going to love, I love you. I'm sorry for all the pain that i gave you. I can assure you that i'm all yours. Nobody will get the same attention and love that i will give to you. I will show you off at all times. You don't have to worry about me cheating on you, Cause i'm all yours 24/7 everyday. But please do me one favor, Be truthful, Be honest & Be loyal. That's all that i'm asking you to give me. I don't need fancy gifts, i don't need any materialistic things. All that i need is your time and attention,

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Don’t fall in love with a woman who reads, a woman who feels too much, a woman who writes.  Don’t fall in love with an educated, magical, delusional, crazy woman. Don’t fall in love with a woman who thinks, who knows what she knows and also knows how to fly; a woman sure of herself.  Don’t fall in love with a woman who laughs or cries making love, knows how to turn her spirit into flesh; let alone that one who loves poetry (these are the most dangerous) or spends half an hour contemplating a painting and isn’t able to live without music.  Don’t fall in love with a woman who is interested in politics and is rebellious and feels a huge horror from injustice. One who does not like to watch television at all. Or a woman who is beautiful no matter the features of her face or her body.  Don’t fall in love with a woman who is intense, entertaining, lucid and irrelevant. Don’t wish to fall in love with a woman like that. Because when you fall in love with a woman like that, whether she stays with you or not, whether she loves you or not, from a woman like that, you never come back. 

Martha Riveria Garrido (via anavableu)

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From the bottom of my heart, thank you for having been by my side through everything when people have let me down and hurt me. I wouldn’t been able to handle all my battles without you my love, and that’s something I hope you’ll remember forever, because there are not many people like you. You are too valuable to be one in the crowd of all the 7 billion people.

Poets Love Her (via poetsloveher)

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50 random things about me

1. I love writing. I don’t know why but i just find writing very fascinating, i love looking back at old notes and random things that i write while i’m bored

2. I can finish a whole K-drama in just a day. Sounds crazy but true, if you’ll look closely you’ll see my eye bags in fact i don’t call it eye bags any more, i like to call it my very own eye luggage.

3. James Bond movies? Heck yeah.

4. Every morning especially during school days, I would wake up early bring my phone with me to the bathroom, play music and sleep while sitting in the toilet. (is it just me? lol)

5. I love spicy food!!! I got it from my Lolo :)

6. If i feel awkward around you. Expect me to open up and talk about things that doesn’t make any sense just to break up the awkwardness. (glad it works... sometimes)

7. I’m an introvert.

8. One of my biggest pet peeves is when someone walks into my room, closes the door and leaves a tiny bit of crack, which basically means. JUST PLEASE FULLY CLOSE THE DOOR!

9. I’m afraid of birds. every. kind. of. birds. especially chicken omg!

10. It may sound crazy, and this 10th fact contradicts the 9th one. My favorite food is fried chicken!!!!!

11. Earrings and watches are my favorite types of jewelries.

12. I’am a nice person. I don’t get mad. Not unless you did something very unacceptable to every human kind.

13. I’m a very clingy person.

14. I like long messages.

15. I sing a lot. In the bathroom, living room, class room, any place that you can think of i will sing whenever i want to.

16. I’m a very silly person. I love doing silly things.

17. I hate it when someone farts and never admits that it was them. #lol

18. I hate smiling with my teeth. My face becomes bigger (ugh), But ever since i got my braces, i was forced to smile with my teeth or else it will look like i have a lot of food stuck on my teeth.

19. I have diabetes. Sucks. But the hardest is having it as a teenager, I can’t do things that a normal teenager does.

20. I don’t like Starbucks. (PS: It tastes good tho) But the thought of paying over 100+ pesos just for a frappe, That’s a big no no for me. I’d rather pay a visit at Zentea (omg yes!!) or Farron Cafe.

21. If you’re friends with me expect to receive random long messages or voice calls or pictures. No matter what time it is! I’ll be sending u random stuffs from time to time.

22. Double Dutch, Cookies n’ Cream and Lime are my favorite ice cream flavors. (yum!!)

23. I do regret a lot of things. I regret not paying attention to my health. I regret not saying whatever i want to say. And now looking at it, i’m always stuck with those “what if’s”

24. My all time favorite movie is High School Musical! <3

25. Whenever i’m a round people that i don’t really get along well. You will barely see me smile. It would be a miracle you can make me talk.

26. I can’t leave the house without my phone, power bank, pocket wifi, cords, make up kit and a bottle of water. So most of the time, i always bring huge bags with me.

27. I love my family so much! (including my friends)

28. If you are friends with me you know the struggles of having to worry about me especially on my darkest days because you know what i’m capable of doing to myself. (thank u to my friends for always sticking by my side!! u guys are the best)

29. Depression and Anxiety is already a part of me.

30. I don’t hate anyone.. lol

31. I’m honestly the sweetest person that i know.

32. I love weekends. My family usually hang out every weekend, there’s always a lot of food and drinks. Happiness just surrounds us.

33. I can’t go out without any make-up on. Read a blog about it here.

34. I tend to do a lot of crazy stuffs. Especially whenever i’m with my friends or cousins. 

35. i laugh at my own jokes. It may not sound funny to anyone but it will always sounds funny to me.

36. I’am 1% of the world’s populations that isn’t attracted to guys with abs. If you can make me laugh and you can carry on with my craziness that’s enough for me.

37. I love pineapple. (yumm-eh!!)

38. Whenever i’m in a bad mood or you piss me off. I would distance myself or not talk at all. i hate getting into arguments.

39. I finish my food like crazy. Most of the time my family or friends will joke about how the dish washer should not wash the plate that i used. Because it looks clean, fresh and new. (katakawan at it’s finest) 

40. I don’t like expensive stuffs. For example, if we go on a date. I won’t appreciate it if you’ll take me to a fancy resto. I’d rather go on a street food date and eat street foods (especially isaw and chicken balls). anytime!!!

41. I would prefer black gulaman palamig over frappes at any cost!!! 

42. I do drink (occasionally), But i would never smoke.

43. Rom-Com films? A BIG HECK YEAH!!!!

44. I don’t shop a lot. 

45. I am always hyper at night. I could stay up all night. Either dancing or singing!!! (i never lacks on energy...lol)

46. I want to become a flight stewardess. (libre mangarap...lol)

47. I love soups. 

48. I love the combination of fried rice and tinapa (dried fish).

49. I’am so weird. Sometimes you’ll wonder “why am i even friends with her?”

50. Either you like me or not. I’ll continue to do whatever i want to do. 😋

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do not fall in love with me

“so how does it feel to be loved by someone like you?”

Do not fall in love with me, because i will take you to museums, parks, libraries, photobooths, food trips and places that only the two of us will know. Do not fall in love with me if you don’t want someone to write and compose hundred of songs about you. Do not fall in love with me if dont like being photograph in the most random way possible. Do not fall in love with me if you don’t like it when someone write poetries about you. Do not fall in love with me if you don’t like getting long messages. Do not fall in love with me if you don’t like good morning and good night texts. Do not fall in love with me if you don’t like late night conversations. Do not fall in love with me if you don’t like long walks and dogs. Do not fall in love with me if you don’t like it when someone puts an effort and free their time just to be with you. Do not fall in love with me if you don’t like surprises. Do not fall in love with me if you can’t take my craziness. And lastly, Do not fall in love with me if you don’t like to be shown off, because for me showing you off is my only way of telling the world how much you mean to me. But please do me one big favor, Do not trick me with the thought that you already fell in love with me just to make me do all the things that i'm willing to do just for you.

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“what is love? how did you know you were in love with him?” “i guess i knew i was in love with him when his bad days became my bad days. when his good days became my good days. i don’t know, i never met anyone like him before. i guess i knew i was in love when i wish it would storm so i could see him become excited about something he loved. so i could see him smile. i guess i knew i was in love with him when the thought of him leaving scared the hell out of me. i guess i knew i was in love with him when i would roll over to the other side of the bed and reach for a hand that wasn’t there anymore. i guess i knew i was in love with him when losing him felt like losing a friend, best friend and boyfriend all in one. i guess i knew i was in love with him when i use to dread the morning but somehow wanted to wake up to it everyday. i guess i knew i was in love with him when my days suddenly became more quiet. i guess i knew i was in love with him when the thought of him never left my mind even though it’s been a year. i guess i knew i was in love with him when i wasn’t the best version of myself the way i was with him. he made me feel like i knew what love was. he made me feel like i was worthy of a type of love they talk about in movies and fairytales. the closest thing we have to magic is love and with him.. magic was our love. magic was us. magic was him. it’s always going to be him.”

I think that’s love // Deeply Feeling Series  (via promisesofamazing)

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But you see, it cannot bring back all the tears that had run out from my eyes. It cannot change all the sadness I’ve felt—the terrible feelings I tried to explain. You cannot just catch those waves with your hands and throw them to the ocean again. You cannot just pick those petals from a beautiful flower and regret it afterwards, wishing that maybe it will grow more stunning if you let it bloom on its own way. You cannot just let a bottle fall on the ground and decide to use it again even its sharp edges can painfully tear your palms. Because your sorry cannot change the past. Your sorry cannot change all the things you made me feel. You see, it’s different this time. You cannot just break someone’s heart and make them feel worthless that way—then put the blame on them. You cannot just say sorry for each and everything. You should have known that what you’ve done is wrong especially when you clearly did it intentionally. Especially when you did it selfishly.

ma.c.a // Because you’re not really sorry (via vomitingwords)

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Nobody wants to hear this, but sometimes the person you want most, is the person you’re best without.

B.J (via lohver)

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1. In my dreams we’re walking along the edge of the universe. My love for you, the sun. Time isn’t real here; there’s only us. Forever.  but then again, my dreams aren’t real either. And forever doesn’t exist. 2. Sunsets still remind me of you, and i’m still convinced you’re the one who makes the sky blush every time. But it’s been raining ever since you left. All i ever wanted was to watch a sunrise through sunset with you.  3. We’re together in every universe. We’re happy in every reality. I’m so sick and tired of all these parallel universes playing out in my head where we’re together. 4. I wanted to love you so much, the scars they left on your heart would start to fade until i realized scars don’t fade no matter how much you try. 5. Today my friend asked me “how many fucking times do you think of him?” and i said “once” because ever since i met you, you haven’t left my mind. I guess i should’ve known i left yours long ago.

Lessons on loving you  (via trustissued)

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To The Girl Who’s Still Trying

You truly love him, don’t you? You just couldn’t stop thinking of him, until it came to the point that he is your first thought every morning as you open up your eyes and he will always be one of your prayers at night and your 11:11 wish. You check your phone thinking that there might be a text or a call from him. You check his profile checking if he’s online, looking at his photos and stalking his profile just to make sure he’s doing well. You have a lot of things going on, but he’s still your priority. 

You are losing your sleep waiting for him to fall asleep, while you think of him, he is thinking of other things and worse, maybe he’s thinking of other girl. You always wait for his replies, even though it’s just a short text or it’s just a simple “haha”, it still sends butterflies to your stomach. But do you deserve this? Does he deserve you? Do you deserve him?

One day you realized you were over it, you’re just tired and you tried to move on. But then he walk passed you and all of the butterflies suddenly flew to your stomach again, and worst or maybe not, he smiled at you and it made you wanna pass out thinking how breathtaking his smile was, how wonderful he looks and how beautiful his eyes were.

He may not care about your existence, but you’ll always care for his. He is your reason for everything. He was one of the best thing that you never really had. But you always needed and wanted him and only him. 

You turn down a lot of guys for the guy that never really care about you. And you started thinking again. “Do I deserve this? Does he deserve me? Do i deserve him? Is he worthy of all the pain?”

Everyone started telling you that you deserve someone better, someone that will actually put an effort just to talk to you and plan their day just to spend time with you. They tell you, you deserve someone who actually cares about you and someone that talks to God about you. 

You’re the girl that’s worthy of all the love in the world, you’re one of those girls worth spending the rest of someone’s life with, and you’re the girl that deserves nothing but the best in life. and last You don’t deserve to be “the girl who’s still trying”, You deserve to be the girl that a guy shows off. You deserve to find someone who makes you feel like you are the one. And loves all the imperfections you have.

And hopefully as time passes by, you’ll soon forget about the guy that you always “wanted”. Because, After all if you are not the one thing he’s giving his everything to, then maybe you should just stop because he shouldn’t be the guy you are still dedicated to.

—

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Life Update!!

It’s been a long time since my last post, a lot of things have happened, a lot of things have changed, I’am no longer writing poems for the same person, haha, But one huge thing!!! I got braces, Last Saturday. 14 of January 2017, 8:30 AM. Today is almost my 2nd day having it, and omg, i thought im getting used to it, but I’m not :(. It hurts so much.... But, eventually, my ate told me that the pain will go away after a week, because i’ll get used to with the pain. I have new blogs coming up!!! Yaaaay

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Just To Keep You

Losing you is my biggest fear. Whenever I do something wrong I always tend to blame everyone, I blame myself, I blame my family and I blame my friends but I never blame you, because that’s how much i love you. I did everything just to keep you, But unfortunately I didn’t realize that i was too blind to see, that you are slowly drifting away from me. And once again I didn’t blame you, I blame everyone, I blame my family for telling me that I should just stay away from you and for not supporting my decisions, I blame my friends for telling me that you never really love me, I blame them for making my family hate you, and lastly I blame myself for not being good enough for you. Then it came to the point where I broke down, I look back, I reminisce, I shut down and drift apart, Then suddenly I woke up, I woke up from the reality that I lost myself just to be able to keep you. I lost my family, my friends and everyone close to me just to keep you. And that was the biggest mistake I’ve ever made, I didn’t realize how stupid i became when I fell in love with you, I was stupid enough to eventually lose myself and lose everything that I have just because of the word “I love you”.

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THE SUNDAY CURRENTLY | 03

It’s Sunday again, meaning goodbye weekends, long nights, lazy mornings and say hello to weekdays, school flow and stress. SEM-BREAK IS OVER 😭 Though i really had so much fun this week!! SO MUCH! like literally a lot! 😍 I spend the whole week with my childhood friends and my family which means it includes a lot of food feast all day everyday! Saddest news is probably me gaining 2.5kg 😩😔 But the most important thing is that we really had fun this week! Then my tito, Tito Louie gave me a karaoke/videoke ❤️ and it is probably one of the best early christmas present!

Reading: 💭 nothing actually HAHHAHAHAHA 😭 Writing: Our thesis and this week's blog entry for The Sunday Currently🙈 Listening: I'd Lie by Taylor Swift ❤️ so much feels for this song! Thinking: About what could possibly happen tomorrow! 🙈 will i see him? hmmmm.. who knows 💬 and also what happened to my guy friend why is his tweets like that, but i'm too afraid to ask him. 😛 Smelling: nothing 😂 Hoping: for good grades this quarter and positivity and more blessings all throughout the remaining days of 2016! Wearing: My green shorts and Human floral shirt. Hahahha 😂 Loving: My new blog icon! and my kylie lippies! yaaay ❤️ Needing: still.. new clothes, more lippies, semestral break and moneeeey!👀👅

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Dear Current Self 💖

Dear current self, I know you've been striving very hard to be the slave of perfection, You've been pretending to be fine to be the best girl. You've been trying to be the successful lady wannabe. You've been trying and working so hard proving yourself to people around you. You've been hiding your sincerest emotions to show them that you're "fine". You've been traveling along the path for what is righteousness for others but i know what you really want, you want to walk the path of acceptance that no matter how many rocks will block your way you will never give up. I know and i can see that you have been exhausted - begging, trying, pretending and taking all the adjustments that this society is giving you. You've been longing for the appreciation of your little capabilities. I've been watching you for awhile, you relapsed, you procrastinate, you hated yourself, you lied to yourself, you said you can still do it, but in reality, you're just tired. I can see it, you're tired of all the bullshits and crap that this world is giving and putting in your shoulder, You're tired and i can see it, But still you wanted to continue, because you want to prove them that they're wrong, you want to prove them that you can do it. But please, take care of yourself and love yourself. I can see it, You've been jumping and becoming someone you're really not. Let me remind you, Don't put yourself under pressure over the norms of your surrounding. Don't mind other's criticism. Don't let anybody dictate your role in this society. Stop aiming to be the most flawless creation. Get a life. Have a life. Experience Life. Dear, just please take off the mask. Be yourself. Know your worth. Love, Your future self.