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*in the middle of a breakdown* Omg wait. this is just like the character

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the whole "lipstick on a pig" thing makes no sense because the second we gave a pig access to makeup she became god's cuntiest soldier

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he was so real for this. i really must

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[staggering to my feet and wiping a single perfect drip of blood from my mouth] i have to get back on my bullshit. no matter the cost

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nice pair of characters who trust each other more than anyone else in the whole entire world it would sure be a shame if one of them betrayed that trust for the sake of trying to keep the other alive. it would sure be a shame to love someone so much you destroy them

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Beyond parody.

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Being a weird little girl as a kid provides two options to you: becoming transgender or becoming a weird adult woman. Both of which are things the world needs more of

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the real danger of spending too much time with friends is you stumble out of ten days of happiness and good food like oh my god THAT was real life. my job means NOTHING

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ma'am, I'm going to place you on a brief hold while I look for a reaction image

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Saying this right fucking now.

I don’t want to see ANY of you touching that fuckass new Harry Potter series.

That woman has set us back YEARS. YEARS. And whose money is she using to do it? People who continually support her and her sorry excuse for a book series.

If you simply must watch it? Pirate. It’s not hard.

Do not give her money. Do not give her a platform. Do not contribute. Please.

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me, unloading a fitted sheet from the dryer: *squinting* what's that you've got in your mouth

fitted sheet: nothing :)))))))

me, prying open its twisted jaws: na-ah!!! give it to me RIGHT now!!

fitted sheet: *resentfully spits out a wad of 3 very damp dishtowels, a pillowcase, and a pathetically sodden washcloth*

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