5pinbowler - Tumblr blog

[5pinbowler]

Normal husky doing normal husky things

[5pinbowler]

rb to give a flower to the person you rb this from

[5pinbowler]

It is so fucking exhausting fighting your brain every day dude

[5pinbowler]

Confession time

🌷- you have a super sweet smile

🍄- Let’s hold hands & explore for hours

🌿- you don’t realise how beautiful you are

👋🏻- I wanna be your friend

🎧- you have great taste in music

🍒- you’re such a tease

🌎- why are you so far away?!?!?

🌶- I find you verrrry sexy

🌻- I could talk to you for hours

💐- you’re a total cutie

🍂- I wanna lay in bed and cuddle you

✌🏻- Netflix n chill?

🌸- I think about you a fair bit

🌞- I wanna make out with you

🌚- I’d totally fuck you

💫- I wanna talk to you but i’m too shy

🌈- we have lots in common

☂️-we have nothing in common

💥- you’re really damn annoying

🌧- I find your blog boring

🥀- you’re dead to me

👻- I wish I never met you

[5pinbowler]

saw her url in my notifications and got hard

[5pinbowler]

[5pinbowler]

Bro, you don't even wanna devour her. Why are you wasting her time. Just jerk off and stop bothering her pretending you want more.

[5pinbowler]

[5pinbowler]

Comic by PetFoolery

Hands up if you'd also adopt that little noodle! ✋

[5pinbowler]

ok but do you understand how exhausting it is for me to never get a break from me

[5pinbowler]

[5pinbowler]

it’s sooo funny when rude customers encounter employees who can deny them service for the first time.

i was working at a little cafe where I could deny service over bad behavior, harassment etc. & mask mandates had just ended a week before & already people were being weird about me still wearing mine—an N95, the kind shaped kinda like a duckbill.

so this man walked in, looked at me sooo scathingly, laughed at me, and said “damn. never known a woman to choose…practicality over looks.”

And I just said, “oh. you can go, you’re not getting a drink.” And he said, “what???”

I said, “sir, you just walked in at 6 am & called women impractical and me ugly in one sentence.”

And he was so astonished he didn’t even argue he just turned around and left 💀🙏🏻 it was like he suddenly became self aware

[5pinbowler]

Me, fighting a yoga mom in the organic food market circa 2023: take your hand off that peach or I’ll vaccinate your children against polio

[5pinbowler]

them: i love you

me: that’s nice however that is Impossible™ considering i am, to the very core, fundamentally unloveable

[5pinbowler]

just saw multiple people asking in the comments of a post if they can use and wear a carabiner for their keys if they're bi or otherwise not a lesbian and I simply have to ask if people know that carabiners are used for many purposes beyond signaling lesbianism. like girl they were invented in the early modern period for their functional use as a clasp it's not like they're some closed lesbian practice......

[5pinbowler]

“platonic age gaps are problematic-“

are you guys really not friends with your parents? your siblings? your older and younger cousins? your professors and teachers and mentors? the regulars at the cafe twice your age? your motherfucking grandparents? open your eyes and your hearts to what a friend can be.

[5pinbowler]