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started playing Dragon Age Origins and I need Alistair so bad it’s not even funny

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reblog to give your headache to elon musk instead

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The cruelty of racist white men.

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everyone shut the fuck up. wurmple sippy soup

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I have to assume that in the fullness of time, at least once, a mouse has used a mushroom as an umbrella.

That’s enough to keep me going.

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Whoever wrote this, slayed so hard with all these statements, truer words have never been spoken

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This has been going around my work and friend group on other platforms, and I thought it deserved a place here too.

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trending news

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The health insurance industry has a term for this sadistic practice. It's called "step therapy." If the choice is between a more expensive medication that works and a cheaper one that doesn't work as well and might have worse side effects, the insurance company requires that the cheaper drug be used first.

One benefit to the insurance company is that the patient on the cheaper drug might die before they get a chance to use the drug that works but is more expensive. That's money in the bank for the insurance company.

Or, the patient might be so worn down and harmed by the cheaper drug that they just give up the fight to get the drug that will help them. Again, that's bank for the insurance company.

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I have never been so regularly embarrassed by a protag as I am by Rook in Veilguard. Sure, I've played other protags who like puns and bad jokes, but those usually manage to pass themselves off as charming at least 50% of the time. Rook has negative rizz. Rook has never had an ounce of charm in their body. They say the most atrocious things at the worst times. I just am bracing myself for what is going to come out of their mouth next, honestly all the time but ESPECIALLY during romance interactions. Doesn't matter what variation of the reply you choose, they are all gonna have you with your head in your hands. No one has ever been less capable of reading a room. I want to fight them.

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THE ADDAMS FAMILY (1991)

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Nice try Bioware, but I know the state of Southern Thedas better than you do.

First off, it matters if the Hero of Ferelden is alive or not. When the First Warden recalled all wardens, our hero knew that was a bad call and refused, finally splitting off from Weisshaupt after years of mismanagement and taking scores of wardens with them. Their presence and leadership makes all the difference, rallying southern Thedas once more against the blight. If you have only an Orlesian Warden Commander in Amaranthine they’re less inspiring, but as long as you’ve done Awakening they are a boon nonetheless. There is someone to lead the fight against the darkspawn while other focus on the Venatori.

If you 100% completed Awakenings and also Soldier’s Peak, the Ferelden wardens have never been so prepared. They’re organized, they’re outfitted and they’ve been ready for this for years. Also, if you allied with the Architect then you have scores of strange research to give you an edge.

If Merrill completed her Eluvian then she moves south once again and joins the effort. She’s managed to cleanse the blight before and she’s ready to try it again. And her knowledge of the crossroads gives the south an edge on their movement and supply lines. If Hawke’s sibling is a Warden they accompanied her.

If the Inquisitor let Briala have power in any way, the Dales become the leaders in the war against the Venatori, forming a formidable alliance with Ferelden, Orzammar and the Marches, the likes of which have never been seen. And if you completed Jaws of Hakkon then their alliances with the Avvar and Chasind are stronger than ever.

Of course, if the Inquisitor kept the Wardens around after Here Lies the Abyss then their numbers are bolstered. It may cost Wiesshaupt later, but that’s Rooks problem. And if you completed the Descent, then the Inquisitor and Warden had a much better idea of what was coming and spent ten years getting ready.

They will not be broken.

They will weather this storm.

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Now THIS is the biggest glow-up in Dragon Age history