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250816 riizing loud live in kuala lumpur memo

ive been rooting for sungchan and shotaro since their nct days, so the fact that i got to see them in their fixed group 3 years later was so great! the ticket was bought on a whim, when i first tried to purchase them it was all sold out, but just a few days before, i suddenly saw an update that tickets were still available and i rushed to buy one. im glad i did!

it was my first pop concert, first kpop concert, and first idol concert as well. it was a completely different experience compared to all the other concerts ive attended in person, so i have a lot of thoughts…..

thoughts on the arena:

the arena is located in a shopping mall near my house so logistics was easy. it used to be a cinema which was converted into an event space. i remember going to that exact cinema after school to watch movies... and more than 10 years later i went to watch a concert in the same place! that was a cool experience! also it was probably the first time i've ever seen so many people at that venue lol.

the position i got was the worst ive ever experienced. since my tickets were last minute, i was placed right at the back. i could barely see the members at the extended stage and i couldnt see them at all on the main stage. i had to mostly rely on the screen.

i generally try not to record and take pictures a lot during concerts, but especially in this concert, i found recording almost impossible because everyone else was recording and blocking the view. so this was probably the concert i recorded or took photos of the least. i felt like i was a strange person dancing and singing on my own compared to everyone else who was recording.. but ultimately i didn't want to hinder my enjoyment at the concert for the purpose of trying to get a good photo... (though i think i would be the perfect audience member for a mitski concert.... please come back to malaysia!)

sungchan and shotaro were positioned at my side of the hall so i had a clearer view of them compared to the other members. i wanted to pay attention to the other members too, but it was so difficult to see anything at all so i could only pay attention to whoever was at my side of the stage.... thankfully i got to catch little moments of everyone at least once...

someone was wearing santal 33 and it smelt sooooo good.. i didn't even need to wonder if it was a dupe, i could just tell right away that it was the og. also i was wearing the noir 29 so it smelled like sungsho at my area heh heh…

im sorry to everyone whose fancams ive ruined with my singing… i even ruined the few videos i managed to record…. but that happens with all the concerts i attend so.... it will only be worse at my next concert

thoughts on the members:

i know shotaro likes to be called cool rather than cute, but... im sorry... his demeanour is naturally cute... but what stood out to me was that he was eager to express his feelings and communicate properly with everyone despite the language barrier.

sungchan is very good at fanservice. he went around trying to look into the fans eyes, so i felt he was trying to connect with everyone in this way. also i noticed he easily took control of the ments a lot, i guess thanks to his mcing job back in the day.

the other members were all really cute and cool! im glad i got to see them in person. i really do wish that i could have seen more of them, but i really barely could see anything, and when they came to my side of the stage, everyone rushed for their attention and ended up blocking my view...

memorable ment - anton: our concert name is rising loud. we want our fans to be loud as well. i know im not the right person who should be saying this... (everyone laughs)

sungchan said he wanted to make eye contact with fans. unfortunately each time he came to my side of the stage the fans around me screamed loudly so i got embarrassed and kept looking away.. im sorry...

but at the end shotaro looked at my general direction and waved! i was happy~

malaysian things:-

everyone was impressed by the twin towers, especially wonbin. at some point i think anton(?) corrected wonbin's pronounciation of twin towers...

food that they ate: taro - rice with coconut milk(?) (nasi lemak?); sungchan - bread and eggs(?) (roti telur? i gave him a thumbs up for that!); sohee - satay. he said its the best!

they said some cute things in malay. sungsho - i'm very happy in malaysia! maknaez - you're so cute! seokbin - i love you all!

most of the malaysian fans were fans since debut. it wasn't surprising since all the people i talked to were fans since sm rookies and nct days... we all went to mesopotamia high school and attended ms ishtars irrigation class...

malaysian fans dont really memorise fanchants, they all just yell the parts of the songs they remember. which is good cause im the sing along type of person too!

at his ending ment sungchan said apa khabar which was a little strange to say at the end of a performance but the malaysian fans around me replied with khabar baik anyway. apparently he wanted to say terima kasih lol

the audience sang inside my love so many times riize found it funny and said malaysian fans really love singing. and its true like i will sing inside my love 100000 times idgaf

thoughts on the performances:

i could barely see any of the dance performances in person. the only dance i saw in person was when they went to the extended stage for "fly up", and it was only just a little bit. everything else was through the screen… so i can't really say much about their dancing… which is a shame because taro is known for dancing… but oh well, i go to concerts for music, so it's not a big deal for me

everyone sang very well. their voices sound fuller live, especially eunseok and anton. i could feel that the members really like singing and want their voices to be heard even when the backtrack was really loud. that made me happy. i was very impressed with everyone, but wonbin stood out to me the most! sohee's high notes sound even better in person, my favourite was "love 119"! and vocal wise, i was impressed with everyone in "the end of the day".

"9 days" was really so fun, i pretended i was at the club and had the time of my life. and i got to see sungchan and shotaro have their cute little dance together! i was so happy....

i also pretended i was at the club during "impossible"... it's really such a fun song.... i love all songs that sound like i'm at a gay club.

i only know the japanese lyrics to "be my next" so it was awkward when i tried to sing along....

my highlight of the night was definitely "one kiss". ive been listening to it a lot to help me get through really hard times and it was really beautiful to hear the song live… at some point i just sang along with my hand on my chest like it was the national anthem or something ejfjjfekd im so so happy i got to hear a song that helped me a lot live!

thoughts on the concert experience:

i'm not good at korean so i had to rely on the translator to respond to the questions and encouraging words posed by the members. it was the first time i was affected by a language barrier during a concert and honestly it was a little sad...

pop concerts are a very different experience from rock bands. visuals are a big part of the experience.... you cant just close your eyes and sing, there are a lot of things going on! and all the members are doing different things... i felt there were a lot of things i had to pay attention to with my eyes lol. but i just ended up watching whoever was on the screen cause i couldnt see anything else lol

on the flip side, "sound" wasnt a big part of this concert. since theres no live band, the music is almost completely the same as the studio version, and theres not much you need to pay attention to in terms of "sound", for example how different the instruments sound live vs the studio version. because of that, the wonbin-anton bass and guitar duo stood out a lot in terms of sound. but there were little bits that they changed, like an upbeat christmassy version of love 119 and a clubby edm version of 9 days, to give some variety to the sound of the concert.

once again i was reminded that fanservice by men is not intended for me… when the members took off their outer shirts to change outfits, the people around me went wild, but i just thought it was a good break until the next song lol. when sohee said the tension got higher cause they performed sexy songs, i felt like the outlier lol. also at some point sungchan teased the fans at my section by playing around with his outer shirt, which i found funny. i really am not the target audience for things like these… but it was a fun experience seeing fans go wild for these things!

thoughts on the fan experience:

this was the first time i've experienced fan merchandise being sold so many hours before the concert time... and i had to wait about 45 minutes in the merchandise queue. it was kind of funny cause the location of the venue was nearby the mall's infamous sex toy shop so everyone had to pass by that shop to get to the merch... lol

i got to talk to some fans while waiting in line for merch and for the concert to start. while talking to them, i realised that being part of kpop fan culture (and concert culture in general) is very different from being just a casual fan… they were taking into consideration a lot of things i never even thought of.

everyone happily talked about other groups. even if they were groups i didnt keep up with, i engaged with them and talked. all this fandom war stuff really only exists on the internet…

even though the concert was practically sold out, i was still amazed at how many people there were queuing and attending the concert. also there were male malaysian fans! there were quite a number of male sungchan fans at my area... lol

this is not a critique or anything but i really felt that a lot of people went for the concert for the purpose of getting interactions. each time a member came to my side of the stage, the fans would scream and try and grab the member's attention, even when other members are speaking. this also happens during band concerts but its on a much bigger scale when it comes to idol concerts like... is it really normal for a large group of people to scream for attention from someone when someone else is talking? its definitely not what im used to! it was a new experience to me....

the fan reaction to their "monster" performance made me laugh a lot. i felt like everyone around me was an exol? for all the other songs, they would sing the english part only. but for "monster", the fans around me were singing the entire song loudly. some even did the fanchant...

overall it was really an interesting experience. i honestly felt like i was stepping into another world where people were having all sorts of considerations that i never thought of in my life. but i'm really glad i took the chance and bought the tickets because i had such a good time, despite not being able to see very well. after all, the purpose of a concert is music to me, and i enjoyed the music to the absolute fullest!

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in 2024, i tried to listen to more artists/albums, tried to finish albums which i abandoned listening to part-way, and tried to listen to the albums i said i would listen to but ended up putting it off. i still haven't finished listening to the albums i abandoned part way and there are still a lot of albums i put off, but i did expand my taste and listened to more albums than i usually do. i decided to compile the list and put them somewhere at the end of the year so that i can see how much i listened to.

so here is 2024's album list.

(criteria: needs to be at least 4 songs long. there were some single albums that didn't make the list because of this.)

new albums (2024)

ariana grande - eternal sunshine

taeyong - tap

lim hyunsik - the young man and the deep sea

beyonce - cowboy carter

hozier - unheard

doyoung - youth

onewe - planet nine isotrophy

billie eilish - hit me hard and soft

dua lipa - radical optimism

kep1er - kep1 going on

charli xcx - brat

normani - dopamine

tyla - tyla

nct127 - walk

jaehyun - j

oh my girl - dreamy resonance

charli xcx - brat and its completely different but also still brat

a.g cook - britpop

willow - ceremonial contrafact

bon iver - sable

kep1er - tipi tap

magdalena bay - imaginal disk

cat burns - early twenties

laufey - bewitched the goddess edition

tyler the creator - chromakopia

bastille - & (ampersand)

kendrick lamar - gnx

homecomings - see you, frail angel. sea adore you

sza - lana sos deluxe

new(ish) albums (2023)

travis scott - utopia

chappell roan - the rise and fall of a midwest princess

pinkpantheress - heaven knows

hitsujibungaku - 12 hugs (like butterflies)

justin vernon - hazelton

yoasobi - the book 3

other albums (first time listen)

sophie - oil of every pearl's un-insides (2018)

weyes blood - titanic rising (2019)

grizzly bear - veckatimest (2009)

kendrick lamar - mr. morale and the big steppers (2022)

death cab for cutie - translanticism (2006)

the weeknd - dawn fm (2022)

the postal service - give up (2003)

wilco - yankee hotel foxtrot (2002)

lauryn hill - the miseducation of lauryn hill (1998)

yo la tengo - and then nothing turned itself inside-out (2000)

the weeknd - after hours (2020)

kinokoteikoku - time lapse (2018)

charli xcx - how i'm feeling now (2020)

charli xcx - vroom vroom (2016)

sophie - oil of every pearl's un-insides non-stop remix album (2019)

gfoty - gfotybucks (2017)

yonige - girls like girls (2017)

donna summer - a love trilogy (1976)

other albums (started and unfinished)

kendrick lamar - good kid maad city (2012)

kendrick lamar - to pimp a butterfly (2015)

kendrick lamar - damn (2017)

tyler the creator - igor (2019)

barcelona - absolutes (2008)

i break horses - hearts (2011)

hitsujibungaku - our hope (2022)

volcano choir - repave (2013)

jay-z & kanye west - watch the throne (2011)

radiohead - ok computer (1997)

homecomings - new neighbours (2023)

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240704 hitsujibungaku live in kuala lumpur memo

it was my first concert in over 5 years and one of my favourite bands! unfortunately i was unable to queue early due to work commitments but thankfully the venue was near my office so i managed to get a place a few rows behind the front. i miss my student days where i could queue hours in advance without any employment responsibilities... sob

they are like 1000% better live. the sound was amplified and you could really feel the intensity they want to display through their live performance. even the songs that sound chill on the record sound super intense live!

moeka is so beautiful in person. ive never believed that people look better in person but now i believe it... she already looks great in pictures but seeing her in person is on another level. i lost count of how many times my heart fluttered whenever she smiled...

they opened with 予感. it was the most beautiful thing to hear live. the moment the instruments started blaring i knew i was in for a good time!

everyone sang happy birthday to moeka.

moeka had banana leaf rice and yurika had kopi o, they found it delicious. they asked what was everyones favourite food, everyone tried to tell them but they couldnt catch it and said they would check later.

more than words was of course the crowd favourite and everyone had their phones out. 光るとき also had a great reception. it felt really good to sing along with other fans!

moeka asked us to sing along to the chorus of あいまいでいいよ and everyone sang loudly... after the performance moeka said that she gathered up her courage when she asked us to sing along and she was surprised at the response... 🥲🥲🥲

the highlights of my night were 砂漠の君へ, 光るとき, あいまいでいいよ, and ooparts. some of my absolute favourite songs from them, and they were wonderful live. listening them with fellow fans made the experience even more sweet

there were only two things i was disappointed in - first, the merch was definitely not enough for everyone! it was all sold out so quickly.... and the second was that there were no songs played from ざわめき or 若者達へ, my favourite records... i understand that they were lacking a member and directly came from sg so there was no time for a change to the setlist but... those two albums got me into hitsujibungaku so i wished i could hear at least one song from at least one of those records... but of course, that didnt dampen my experience at all! i had such a great time!

i never expected to be able to watch one of my favourite bands play in kl, so im super glad there was this opportunity to watch them! hopefully they will be able to come again!

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i was tagged by @want2bwell to post 6 albums i've been listening to recently! thank you for the tag!

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JAVELIN is out today. Thank you for listening. I love you.

This album is dedicated to the light of my life, my beloved partner and best friend Evans Richardson, who passed away in April. He was an absolute gem of a person, full of life, love, laughter, curiosity, integrity, and joy. He was one of those rare and beautiful ones you find only once in a lifetime—precious, impeccable, and absolutely exceptional in every way.

I know relationships can be very difficult sometimes, but it’s always worth it to put in the hard work and care for the ones you love, especially the beautiful ones, who are few and far between. If you happen to find that kind of love, hold it close, hold it tight, savor it, tend to it, and give it everything you’ve got, especially in times of trouble. Be kind, be strong, be patient, be forgiving, be vigorous, be wise, and be yourself. Live every day as if it is your last, with fullness and grace, with reverence and love, with gratitude and joy. This is the day the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it.

Thank you. I love you.  XOS

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vodka, rum, gin, or tequila and your sun sign

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you can tell a lot about a persons mental health by their favorite mountain goats song so reblog this and tell me your favorite mountain goats song, mine is currently heel turn 1

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I liked hell. I liked to go there alone, relieved to lie in the wreckage, ruined, physically undone. The worst had happened. What else could hurt me then? I thought it was the worst, thought nothing worse could come. Then nothing did, and no one.

Marie Howe, from Magdalene: Poems; “Magdalene: The Addict”

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friendly reminder: don’t be racist

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Ok Ken (and David). As much as I hate to make you guys famous or even respond to you directly. We all die one day and you're old so fuck it. Yea yea my 2013 performance at the Grammys was absolute shit. Technical difficulties, blah blah. Thanks for the reminder. Very much appreciated. Fuck that performance though. You think that's why I kept my work out of the Grammy process this year? Don't you think I would've wanted to play the show to 'redeem' myself if I felt that way? In reality, I actually wanted to participate in honoring Prince on the show but then I figured my best tribute to that man's legacy would be to continue to be myself out here and to be successful. Winning a TV award doesn't christen me successful. It took me some time to learn that. I bought all my masters back last year in the prime of my career, that's successful. Blonde sold a million plus without a label, that's successful. I am young, black, gifted and independent.. that's my tribute. I've actually been tuning into CBS around this time of year for a while to see who gets the top honor and you know what's really not 'great TV' guys? 1989 getting album of the year over To Pimp A Butterfly. Hands down one of the most 'faulty' TV moments I've seen. Believe the people. Believe the ones who'd rather watch select performances from your program on YouTube the day after because your show puts them to sleep. Use the old gramophone to actually listen bro, I'm one of the best alive. And if you're up for a discussion about the cultural bias and general nerve damage the show you produce suffers from then I'm all for it. Have a good night.

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Paintings by Yuka Hiiragi for the cozyca products 2023 ‘day and night’ calendar

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dessnered >> 8circles

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Mary Oliver, from “Dogfish”, Dream Work

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Jeanette Winterson, Lighthousekeeping

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Someday, you will be in love again. The sun, a wound on your windowsill. Light falls on your dreams. It sounds like someone knocking.

Sanna Wani, from “Memory is Sleeping,” The Puritan (no. 53, Spring 2021)