a-lonely-intp

[a-lonely-intp]

i don't even want to say how I feel anymore

[a-lonely-intp]

I'll be working so hard on

my days not revolving around you anymore

even if it's not what i want myself

it's what I need to do for you

you've made that clear

[a-lonely-intp]

am i that wrong about

everything?

[a-lonely-intp]

if everything else is so much more important

that the only time left for me is minutes before you sleep

and you're angry at me because of your own decision

while at the same time telling me I am nothing to you

when even the simplest of things I ask for are too much

and you leave me without a word

then please don't expect anything back

[a-lonely-intp]

and no one around you gets why

but there's no way to explain

V.E. Schwab, The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue

[a-lonely-intp]

i really feel like i tried enough

making you understand how i feel

either way

i don't want to anymore

i don't want to explain myself, communicate my needs and problems

if it all gets dismissed as something to

"get over with"

i'm too mentally exhausted to trying to please you, without getting it back

don't get me wrong

i love pleasing those around me

especially the ones i love most

but if what i get from it is distance and the feeling of not being taken seriously

then i can't surround myself with it, without hurting myself

yeah i am miserable and dependant

but i can't let people around me just treat me how they want to, even my loved-ones

[a-lonely-intp]

i don't know if I'm too much

or too little sometimes

[a-lonely-intp]

i don't want to go quiet again

[a-lonely-intp]

:(

[a-lonely-intp]

[a-lonely-intp]

feels like a whole day has passed but it was only a few hours

[a-lonely-intp]

angry at myself

[a-lonely-intp]

i feel like anything i want to say

would just make things even worse

so i will just keep

things to myself

[a-lonely-intp]

why do i feel like this is my fault

like it is always my fault

[a-lonely-intp]

i love you

but i hate what u do to me sometimes :(

[a-lonely-intp]

suddenly feel like i'm not that much anymore

hope it's just my head

[a-lonely-intp]

hate my mind