abstractionjuiced
abstractionjuiced
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abstractionjuiced · 13 hours ago
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Basic life stuff on Father’s Day your dad may have never taught you
Men’s pants often have what’s called vanity sizing so a 32 inch waist between different brands is actually different sometimes. It’s still a good idea to try the pants on before you buy them.
A flathead screwdriver can be used on a Phillips head screw.
It’s always morally correct to simply walk away from a salesman. You don’t need to buy a mattress to be polite. Just leave. Walk away. Skedaddle.
A complete meal has fat, protein, carbs, and some kind of fruit or vegetable. A snack should have carbs and protein. That’s how you stay full for longer and get your vitamins. It’s really that simple.
Dumpster diving is legal in many countries including the US, Canada, and Australia but trespassing and property damage are illegal. If you are allowed to be in an area and can access the trash without breaking anything you can just take stuff
You should be thinking about retirement savings even in your 20s and 30s. Get a mutual fund.
If you go gambling, only spend cash and pull out exactly as much money as you’re willing to lose from the atm. Never use a credit card in a casino if you can avoid it.
You can add a layer of seasoning to a cast iron skillet right on the stove. You don’t actually have to put it in the oven every time.
To build a fire, build a little pile of kindling first with plenty of air under it. This can be sticks or leftover wood from the hardware store. Doesn’t matter. Then light some newspaper or leaves under it. This’ll help the kindling catch on fire. Then you can add a log to it. The log needs a long exposure to flames before it catches on fire.
Fresh cut wood needs to dry out for several months before it’ll work as either building material or firewood. Several years is even better.
Flower delivery for simple bouquets costs less than you think it does and makes a nice gift for people who are hard to shop for
University libraries often let the general public get a card to check things out from them for a yearly fee. This is useful to know if you’re ever doing some specific research.
To make hard boiled eggs easier to peel boil them with just barely enough to cover and let a lot of the water burn off. Then shock them in an ice bath when they’re done.
If you or your pets end up killing a venemous snake by accident or in self defense you should bury the head so that no animals get poisoned by it because the fangs can still distribute venom
Tall people who visit your house can see the tops of your cabinets and bookshelves. Clean accordingly if you don’t want people to see dust.
Annuals are plants that will die after one year and perennials are plants that live for multiple years
If you feel gross and like your life sucks maybe try getting a haircut
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abstractionjuiced · 2 days ago
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abstractionjuiced · 2 days ago
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We are seeing the same playbook as Iraq and a lot of Iraqi diaspora also said the same things when it was ongoing. Regardless of how you feel about the Iranian government, do not fucking do CIA job
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abstractionjuiced · 2 days ago
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Saying again to myself 'people have different opinions on fictional stuff and that's ok' whenever I have a knee jerk reaction to someone saying they dislike or like a thing. I recommend this to everyone actually it's good for the soul
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abstractionjuiced · 2 days ago
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hope is a skill
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abstractionjuiced · 2 days ago
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I wish Americans fucked with more foreign music. You don’t have to know the language to appreciate a good record. Folks in other countries listen to our music and don’t speak a lick of english. Music needs no translator
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abstractionjuiced · 4 days ago
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bird computer.....
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abstractionjuiced · 5 days ago
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... Y'know what, sure. why not
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abstractionjuiced · 5 days ago
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 As the war raged on and on across space, time, and the whole of reality, there was one thought in the back of every faction's mind.
"Who's next?"
The universe is a big place, plenty of room to wage war between those who would harness the powers of Heart, Mind, Dream, and Dark, and that was a good thing. Because, people were beginning to realize, that meant they didn't have to wage war anywhere near Planet Pop Star. A tiny little planet, sitting there in the unambiguously unclaimed territory of the Gamble Galaxy, practically ripe for the picking to be conquered. Its Inhabitants largely weak and extremely friendly across the board, and filled with lush flora and vibrant fauna to basically fulfill any need for resources you might have. And yet… 
Dark Matter had tried first, to the surprise of nobody. The black mass was always expanding and attempting to subsume all into itself. But despite its mindless devouring there was a reason it was feared across reality. Everyone expected Pop Star to be absorbed and assimilated.
Instead, the shadows sent over there were never seen again. Dark Matter, being Dark Matter, could not allow this insult to its existence to stand, so it launched a full-scale assault of the planet, and when those further attacks failed the Zero emerged from the cloud for the first time in centuries to attack the planet directly.
And it got annihilated. It bears repeating, THE ZERO, the centerpiece of a primal matter and the EYE of a GOD got annihilated. Its broken, bleeding corpse was dragged back into the mass as the shadows fled back out into space.
Those who heard about it reacted with shock, and disbelief. Dark Matter, defeated so soundly? Impossible. And due to the nature of Dark Matter, it was a story that couldn't be confirmed. So everyone just filed the reports under "look into this later, if you have the time" and went back to waging cosmic war. And things stayed quiet. For a time.
Until the tolling bells of a NOVA were heard ringing throughout Gamble Galaxy.
Everyone within reach of that horrifying sound was filled with terror, and rightfully so. After all, the clockwork wish-granting stars created by the Ancients of long ago were one of the most potent weapons in the universe, so much so that the usage of one was said to signal one of two things: the start of a massive conflict, or the end of one. But that terror was followed by confusion. After all, none of those currently capable of utilizing NOVAs were anywhere near Gamble Galaxy... Which only led to more terror. A dormant NOVA, one hidden by the Ancients in a pocket of Spacetime, had been summoned. Which meant someone with completely unknown goals had the opportunity to change the universal norm permanently. Everyone within earshot waited with bated breath.
But nothing happened. Well, nothing that anyone noticed until later. Those who monitored the crystal prison of the Galacta Knight noticed their time stream alteration detectors flicker for a brief moment as some new scars appeared on the angel's armor where there were none before, but the exact connection to the wishes granted is unknown. And it was wishes, plural. At least two, possibly more, as the chiming of the NOVA recurred. But ultimately, nothing of note occurred. Whatever the wishes did, their effects must have been local enough to not be of consequence.
What WAS of consequence was what happened next. A bright burst of light, blinding the entire galaxy. And a horrific gut wrenching sound familiar to any that had fought in the universal war long enough: the sound of a NOVA dying. But usually it took armies to take down a single NOVA, and Pop Star had no such resources. And yet, the epicenter was in Pop Star's upper atmosphere. With that bright explosion, Pop Star had unknowingly announced its presence to the whole of reality. Now everyone knew that something dangerous was there. The only question was what that dangerous thing wanted.
Naturally, that was when Dark Matter went back for round two.
Its failed previous attempt had been recuperated from. The Zero had been resurrected, Planet Dark Star had been moving itself closer and closer to Gamble Galaxy. In all honesty, Dark Matter had the entirety of the cluster in its sights, and would not accept no for an answer. As far as Dark Matter was concerned, it had not even asked a question, merely stated the fact that all would become like unto itself.
It began by creating a Miracle, a powerful shape-shifting weapon, onto the Fairy planet of Ripple Star. Located on the outskirts of the Cluster and actively participating in the war, the conflict between Dark Matter and the fairies did not raise any alarm to the other factions. But as Ripple Star gradually succumbed to the shadows people began to grow more concerned. When the fairies' greatest weapon and energy source was then witnessed being ejected from the planet entirely and deep into the Gamble Galaxy before it was fractured, those on more friendly terms with the fairies now had cause for alarm. With the local superpower taken down, it seemed like Dark Matter would finally have a new stronghold.
Then, almost as soon as Ripple Star had been fully engulfed, the darkness was shattered. The Miracle Matter was dismantled. Soon after, Dark Star exploded as the power of a repaired and fully operational Crystal was deployed directly into the Zero Two. Dark Matter, for the second time, had been dealt a crushing blow. And this one was a blow it could not recover from. Its core completely dismantled, the shadows dispersed into nothingness. Not completely of course. As a primal force in the universe a total eradication of the Matter most Dark is impossible, and smaller coagulations of it would return to haunt the universe from time to time, but as far as the general populace was concerned Dark Matter had been defeated for good, and the Fairies had somehow managed to come back from what should have been complete and utter defeat.
How the fairies managed it is a secret they keep hidden, but the most likely option is they had assistance, probably from the Inhabitants of one of the planets that the crystal shards rained down upon. But of those worlds... One was Ripple Star itself. Two of them have Inhabitants too primitive for advanced space travel, much less the ability to wage war on a cosmic scale. Another planet's civilization has long since gone extinct leaving only ruins and the prismatic security system Pix to guard them. And while the Humans that once inhabited Shiver Star can still be seen throughout the universe on occasion, they're no longer the superpower they once were as their home planet was abandoned due to nuclear winter. The only option left was Pop Star.
The Fairies refuse to elaborate, but since then they've been increasingly prevalent on the war front, displaying powers and weaponry beyond what they'd previously used. And, some claim, they've been actively suppressing information about Pop Star and the surrounding galaxy from leaking out to the war at large.
Wariness of Pop Star aside, the wars continued. The universe is a big place, with lots of stuff to fight over. But every once in a while the allure of Pop Star would call to one nation or another, and they'd divert their path to the outer parts of the universe to take a crack at claiming whatever power lay there.
All of them failed.
The ambitious thieves known as the Squeak Squad likely got off the lightest. They'd attempted to rob the micronation of Dream Land blind, only to stumble across a Nebula of Dark Matter residue and be quickly dealt with. 
The Witch Drawcia made an attempt, using her powerful magicks to warp the planet against itself. It wasn't enough to stop whatever resides there, however, as soon Drawcia was forced to draw upon the insidious power of Soul to continue fighting, and even then she still fell. Her screams echoed across Space, and since then other Witch Sisters have followed her to their apparent dooms, having never been heard of again as they've encountered Pop Star itself or the remnants of its past foes.
Everyone was shocked when the Underworld made a move, when it had previously been content to watch the unending conflict and absorb the hearts of those who passed away into its own forces. Necrodeus apparently attempted to strike the mysterious force residing on the star-shaped planet directly, and has yet to be heard from since. Likely because the jaw bones that permit him to speak were disintegrated. And this defeat of the King of Hell only led more to try their hand over the years.
Even Patch Land gave it a go. Yes, peaceful, fun loving Patch Land, which has only remained independent because its food and resources can't be used by anyone else. Apparently they were undergoing a civil war at the time. Whatever happened is unclear, but afterward Patch Land became much, much harder to bully.
About the only faction to have any success in getting access to Pop Star's power is the Mirror World. Considering their nature as a dark reflection of the primary dimension it's natural that they should have their own match to whatever Pop Star has up its sleeves. And while this has started to help them perform better in their wars, it decidedly has NOT helped them in their attempts to rule Pop Star itself. Mirror World's own head, the Dark Mind, launched an Assault on the place via a Dimensional Mirror, and got soundly defeated by powers unknown. Since then the forces of the Mirror World have been (ironically) shattered. Those more faithful to their original leader have emphasized their studies of parallel magicks in desperate attempts to revive their Master. But there are also those who have been following a mysterious scarred swordsman, cold and cruel and powerful, who seems fixated on Pop Star for reasons he has yet to divulge. It doesn't seem like any of his efforts have yet borne fruit.
And so on it went until that conman Magolor took his turn... And succeeded. Sort of. 
The Lor had no interest in Pop Star. It was much too far out of their territory, and with their powerful equipment and technology they had very little reason to try and claim a planet that didn't seem worth the risk. But the rogue Magolor, who upon closer inspection has a much more mysterious past than one would assume, had no such qualms for seeking after power. He put his sights on the Master Crown of Halcandra, a device crafted by the ancients and wielded by the Halcandran dragon Lamia for its own purposes. Soon, a Starcutter was seen attacking the dragon and being rebuffed before opening a wormhole and vanishing... To Pop Star. Chasing after rumors he'd heard, of a power that could stop armies in their tracks. 
Everyone expected that to be the end of the rogue Lor. His ship was damaged beyond repair, the rest of his kind unwilling to provide assistance to one who had long since left their number. If he had ended up on the doomworld of Pop Star then he probably ended up dead. Oh well, no skin off anyone else's nose. One tiny person is nothing on the cosmic scale.
But then Magolor came back. And whatever he brought with him, it was enough to take down Lamia and get him the Master Crown. For a brief moment, his Starcutter emanated with black and red. The dream of Lor arcane works amplified by Ancient magic became a reality. The ravaging beasts of Another Dimension, the Doomers, fled in fear. It seemed like the metaphysical was Magolor's to control, and that would lead to him beginning his own conquest.
But only for a moment.
Then the Starcutter fell again. The terrifying power of Soul was invoked from within the Crown, as the rogue Lor fought back against his unknown foe. It wasn't enough. The Master Crown was shattered. Magolor was flung across space. He was found alive (with a collection of some very mysterious apples) and interrogated as to what occurred. He just laughed.
"What's happening on Planet Pop Star? That's for me to know and you to find out!"
Then he escaped, headed back to Pop Star, and no one's heard from him since. But the fact remained: until he had become a threat to it, Magolor had managed to use the secret power of Pop Star to his own gain.
The war continued, and so did the assaults on Pop Star in the background. The Haltmann Works Company had made the next serious attempt other than Mirror World's usual obsession. The HWC's nigh-endless supply of Robobot ranks and their complex mechanization technology had made them quite a force to be reckoned with, but Haltmann had always wanted more power. His exact reasons for doing so are up to debate, and now the only one around to confirm or deny anything is that nefarious secretary of his. As the magnificent Access Ark descended on Pop Star, everyone briefly paused in what they were doing with bated breath.
It all happened so fast. Haltmann was betrayed. The computer system he'd designed, a massive Star Dream OS hooked up to a NOVA and capable of mimicking Soul, proceeded to act in his stead, and declared its desire to perform genocide of all organic life. But first it had to deal with the forces of Pop Star. From what remains of Star Dream's activity logs, it summoned a failed recreation of Dark Matter first. When that failed, it then pulled out a recreation of something more local. The Kingdom of Floralia had largely been ignored due to its location in the Atmosphere of Pop Star, but from Star Dream's data it apparently launched its own assault at the planet's surface with the Assistance of Mirror World, and failed. It makes sense that an incomplete clone of the Queen Sectonia would be no more capable than the original.
So then Star Dream did something monumentally stupid and yanked the Galacta Knight out of his prison. Galacta Knight cut the supercomputer in half, forcing it to reboot and use its Soul OS to remain functional. EVERYONE panicked. Galacta Knight was loose.
And then the angelic being was soundly defeated by unknown forces, returned to his crystal cage, and abruptly tossed back through the portal from whence he came.
Apparently not even the Strongest Warrior in the Galaxy was enough.
Star Dream then attacked on its own, and the results were much the same of the previous NOVA to be a threat to Pop Star. It got soundly defeated, its core shattered. The last few readings collected by its scanners express bafflement and confusion at the forces assaulting it. Its last readings show genuine fear at a seemingly infinite power. "Conclusion: This doesn't look good" indeed.
The message was largely received. Don't send NOVAs to Planet Pop Star. Apparently it eats them.
Everyone other than the still-fixated Mirror World kind of decided to leave Planet Pop Star alone after that. Whatever resides there seemed to be staying local, so as long as no one poked it everything should be able to proceed normally. All those who desired to claim a semblance of sanity would stick to their own business and keep fighting their wars far away from Gamble Galaxy.
Unfortunately, the Officiant of Doom for the Jamba Cult, a madman known as Hyness, cannot be referred to as sane in the slightest. So the Cult set up shop in Gamble Galaxy and promptly decided now would be a good time to try and resurrect Void Termina. Nobody was fond of this. The dead god was among those that everyone would much prefer stayed dead. Void had ties to just about everything: Ancient magic, Lor arcane powers, the Galacta Knight, the primal matters... You name it, Void Termina was connected to it somehow, and the Jamba Cult had decided to mess around with it.
The ritual failed, and the fragments of it were scattered across the galaxy. And quite a few of them landed on Pop Star. In a desperate attempt to repair the ritual and perform it correctly, the Cult launched a Jambastion, a flying fortress larger than a moon, and landed it on Pop Star.
It promptly got ransacked. The Cultists there self-destructed the place in an effort to stop the forces of Pop Star, but it wasn't enough. The sleeping bear had been poked.
Against all odds and to the horror of the rest of the universe, the Jamba Cult successfully gathered enough fragments to recreate the ritual and this time succeeded. The massive form of the god of Destruction towered over the nearby planets.
Then that towering form crumpled to the ground, its monstrous form torn apart from the inside out. Its core, the Astral Birth, was expelled and blasted with an unknown light of extreme power. It was official: the mystery of Pop Star had joined the ranks of those who would be called Godslayers.
Those factions who could be referred to as "reasonable" or "rational" desperately hoped that would be the end of it. The Doomers of Another Dimension were briefly alarmed for reasons unknown, but aside from that everyone kept a wide berth from Pop Star.
Nobody expected Lab Discovera, of all people, to be next on the chopping block. Especially since they'd already been all but destroyed, split into subsidiaries and subsequently eradicated. The Haltmann Works Company had not been friendly to those they viewed as competition. The planet the company was based upon had been struck to ruin, its laboratories empty and its forgotten lands populated by a pack of beasts. The only thing left of Discovera was their bizarre tourist attraction, half of a powerful psionic demigod kept in chemically-induced slumber.
Everyone was caught off guard when Fecto Elfilis awoke and regained its full power. Everyone was even more surprised when it immediately decided to tear open a portal to Pop Star and to try and force the two planets to collide. 
Everyone thought that was the end of Pop Star. The Roche Limit had been breached, collision was inevitable. Everyone had been so focused on their own war that they never expected someone to just up and try and destroy Pop Star directly. Ultimately, the universe could do nothing but watch. Either Fecto Elfilis would succeed and become yet another cosmic force that would join the war and need to be dealt with, or Pop Star would somehow inexplicably survive again and another item would be added to the list of "reasons we don't touch Gamble Galaxy with a thousand light-year long pole".
The latter happened. Fecto Elfilis was eradicated, the portal closed. But that still left the question of why it had chosen to attack Pop Star in the first place. Fecto had not been aware of Pop Star. They had been slumbering, only barely aware enough to view the Forgotten Land through the eyes of the beasts. Had they picked a planet at random or... Had they been provoked? Had the beings of Pop Star somehow ventured to the Forgotten Land and attacked them?
This idea, that Pop Star was now well and truly aware of the greater cosmos and starting to take steps, has struck fear into all. The factions have been fighting for millennia. Their desperate scrambling to obtain more power and resources than everyone else has been the centerpiece of the lives of all for as long as any can remember. The idea of someone coming out of nowhere and WINNING had never been considered. And yet now it could be possible.
There were rumors of course. Rumors of what Pop Star's true power could be. Rumors of a King with an army unlike any seen before. Rumors of Knights dressed in blue and working with deadly efficiency. Rumors of the long-dead Star Warriors returning from the grave, and rumors that the Warriors' enemy, the Nightmare, was the force truly behind it.
For a brief moment, everyone thought the puzzle was solved when the Butterfly was sighted. Morpho, the lurking god, had gone unseen for a time, but a being as powerful as it could theoretically be responsible... But no. The Butterfly was not COMING from Pop Star. It was FLEEING from Pop Star. Morpho's name was added to the list of those who had tried and failed to take Pop Star under their control. And the universe was filled with even more terror.
So now all the factions have reached the conclusion to wait. They wage their wars in their respective corners of reality and they wait. They accumulate even more territory, even more resources, even more power, and they wait. They wait to find out who is next to have a go at solving the mystery. They wait for the names of their opponents to be added to the list, ideally before theirs. And they wait to determine the one who bears a name. 
The Name. 
The Name that has been tied to nearly every rumor out there. The Name sighted only once in Star Dream's files. The Name that made Daroach of the Squeak Squad chuckle, The Name that made the shadowy swordsman of Mirror World scream in rage, The Name that the Fairies refuse to comment on. 
No one knows what The Name means. No one knows if it is truly the source of Pop Star's power. No one knows why The Name invokes the thought of the color pink. No one knows if The Name is even true. 
But The Name is one that nobody will utter, not even in a whisper. For they fear that should they say it, The Name will echo, will drift across the Cosmos like a Spring Breeze. They fear The Name will be heard, and the slumbering giant will be provoked, and bring its wrath down upon them. 
The Name
Is
K I R B Y
"Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!"
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abstractionjuiced · 5 days ago
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abstractionjuiced · 7 days ago
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sometimes you look at someone’s art and you know EXACTLY what’s going on and you’re like
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abstractionjuiced · 7 days ago
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Another fantasy trope story:
A story where a prominent prophesy very clearly states that this specific important thing Must Be Done by the firstborn of one specific guy. So three young heroes head out to fix this: This Guy's official firstborn heir, his bastard he didn't even know about before getting married, and his unofficially adopted orphan kid who just started living with him at some point, who is the oldest of the three so technically speaking is still the one who was born first. And all three must go because while the meaning of the prophesy itself is very clear, it's an utter mystery to everyone which one of them counts as their father's firstborn.
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abstractionjuiced · 7 days ago
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7. I want to see if I can be more irritating than Sumireko (and also kick Kanako’s chair)
Plus this gives me a good view as to the no doubt hysterical Renkaribel couple drama.
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i stole this from twitter but 8 would be really really funny. retrospective 10 hours. stuck between loud lengthy arguments and a few hours of seething silence that would put your parents to shame. nah but personally, 4, for the smell.
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abstractionjuiced · 11 days ago
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have I ever told you how much i adore the concept of clockwork stars. They're the perfect balance of whimsical and deeply, deeply ominous. long-forgotten technology you don't have the first clue toward understanding. easily the most powerful of the ancients' creations. control of even one of the miraculous comets is enough to make you a god. it will do exactly as you ask, but only once. be careful what you wish for.
to think that the ancients had both the drive and ability to fabricate a literal wishing star just... boggles me. why do they exist? for what purpose were they intended? why weren't there any safeguards? how could the ancients have disappeared if they had devices as powerful as these at their disposal? why would they let themselves disappear?… and why would they have allowed something so dangerous to continue to roam the galaxy, eons after they were gone?
it's a fairy. it's a supercomputer. it is the curling finger on the monkey's paw. it's the size of a planet. god, its size. it must be the largest foe kirby has ever fought. there's no contest. To even put a dent in it requires taking it down from the inside. intercepting its immune response, sabotaging its structural support, and failing to smother its eternal, mechanical heartbeat. the sheer scale of this monster! how marvelous it must be to see it in action! translating a request into code, initializing a wish. valves open, gears turn; a cacophony of metallic pings, booms, and clicks. it's the loudest sound you've ever heard. steam whistles from an opening as it boils into the vastness of space. you can't escape the sound, and you can't look away. you're dying. were you careful with what you wished for?
i think it's really fitting how a lot of fan content uses "Nova" as a stand-in for "God" when they want characters to swear to something. there are a lot of godlike characters in Kirby to choose from, a number of whom are actually acknowledged as gods to certain groups within the text of the games themselves -- Dark Nebula, Necrodeus, Void Termina. Not to mention all of the contenders for angel or demigod status. but, no, it's Nova that we swear to? A lifeless machine with no will of its own? a tool with no protections, that any entrepreneuring tyrant could use to make the universe contort to their liking? It just… really speaks to how awe-inspiring and terrifying clockwork stars actually are. there is no "BE NOT AFRAID" when it descends. it does not have the capacity to care how you feel. a simple ">READY" is all it will say. and, honestly, I think that's even scarier.
clockwork stars are the closest thing the kirby universe has to a doomsday device, and i can't get enough of it
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abstractionjuiced · 12 days ago
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The king of being annoying on purpose has a question for you
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abstractionjuiced · 12 days ago
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those weird cat memes i see in every comment section of cat videos on tiktok but its touhou characters
references:
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abstractionjuiced · 14 days ago
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