acyrox

[acyrox]

I bought my copy of The Joy of Cooking in the late 90s--it was a new print at the time, but the latest copyright in it is 1975, so it has a noticeable amount of old culture holdovers.

and...just...

[acyrox]

Some observations on book covers

[acyrox]

[acyrox]

i beat myself up for not knowing enough about my special interests a lot but then i remember the average person off the street has no idea what the carboniferous is and i feel better

[acyrox]

Original

[acyrox]

I am a huge fan of retiring to my quarters

[acyrox]

a printer error is an attempt from god to get you to kill yourself but you must be stronger and you must must must beat the printer to death with a large object like object

[acyrox]

they call me the information withholder for reasons i won't get into

[acyrox]

The human body's response to HRT is actually admirable in the sheer indifference. Just pure I Don't Give A Shit, I Just Fucking Work Here compliance to the new instructions. You can get testosterone injected straight into your body and it doesn't even question where that shit came from, coming back from a coffee break and just going

"Okay, everything seems to be in ord- oh fuck now what? Oh huh. Alright fine. New orders came in, cancel the menstrual cycle. Dig up the genetic balding patterns from somewhere, I don't fucking know they're buried somewhere in the dna. I'm greenlighting the growing-hair-on-your-toes thing. Yeah just cancel the ongoing maintenance processes, new orders came in so this is apparently what we're doing now."

[acyrox]

this is what having sex with sonic the hedgehog sounds like btw

[acyrox]

Me and my cousin have an ongoing bit where we pretend we made "slightly better" versions of things where we'll be like.

"That was a pretty good movie, but not as good as my movie, House of 1001 Corpses," or "I guess this song is okay. Kind of reminds me of a song I'm working on called 'Faster Car'."

Never once has it been funny or made anyone but us laugh.

[acyrox]

[acyrox]

Its so well made its perfect

[acyrox]

[acyrox]

One more joke hate: You may claim to be a woman but biologically you are a featherless biped and thus a man.

Finally a good argument for why I'm actually a man