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Love my new rings off #camden today! ❤ #snake #elephant #ohm #greennailsplussnake #slytherinvibes #reminiscingaboutindia #india #slytherin #actuallyagryffindor #chanellingpansyparkinson

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My personal favorites from Scottish Twitter

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Manly Tears Were Shed Upon Reading These Lines

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Never Judge A Person Until You Know Their Story

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today in french we were doing an exercise on adjective forms and some of the sentences said things like “boys prefer pretty girls,” “girls prefer muscular boys,” etc. and my 40 yr old straight married professor makes an awkward face and says “ok, wow these just got weirdly heteronormative. how about you fill in the blank with whatever noun-adjective combination you want, as long as it follows correct grammar”

and the answers that we came up with were amazing.

girls don’t prefer boys, girls prefer (fast) cars and money 

boys prefer beautiful barbecues

girls prefer annoying cats

boys prefer 75 large plastic dinosaurs

and of course: pretty girls prefer pretty girls 

so remember kids, heteronormativity doesn’t belong in the classroom but 75 large plastic dinosaurs do.

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This Has To Be The Greatest Idea Ever

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me, laying in bed staring at the ceiling: i will never know what josh lyman and donna moss named their children

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asoiaf meme: (2/3) legends ➝ THE NIGHT’S KING The oldest of these tales concern the legendary Night’s King, the thirteenth Lord Commander of the Night’s Watch, who was alleged to have bedded a sorceress pale as a corpse and declared himself a king. For thirteen years the Night’s King and his corpse queen ruled together before King of Winter, Brandon the Breaker, (in alliance, it is said, with the King Beyond-the-Wall, Joramun) brought them down. Thereafter, he obliterated the Night’s King’s very name from memory (some say because the Night’s King was himself a Stark, of the same blood as the man who slew him).

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I Find This Really Amusing

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This is not a drill: Netflix is making a movie about Barack Obama as a young person figuring out his place in the world

Newcomer Devon Terrell plays Barry as he moves to New York City and enrolls in Columbia University. His navigation of biracial identity seems to be particularly front and center, and the film is already drawing its share of positive reviews.

Gifs: Netflix US & Canada

WATCH THE TRAILER

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the harry potter books rated by Harry's Sass™

the sorcerer's stone: dudley asking harry if he wants to practice sticking his head down the toilet and harry replying "no thanks, the poor toilet's never had anything as horrible as your head down it - it might be sick" like ooo!!! sick burn!!! good for an 11 year old but overall still in the developmental stage. 6/10

the chamber of secrets: dudley (once again lmao get rekt) telling harry "i know what day it is" and harry replying "well done, so you've finally learned the days of the week." lockhart trying to be all Amazing Teacher™ and shit and telling harry "just do what i did, harry!" and harry saying "what, drop my wand?" overall good but not with as much of an Oomph™ factor as the sorcerer's stone. 5/10

the prisoner of azkaban: ah yes!!! Harry's Sass™ in its adolescent years!!!! no longer a toddler, now solidly about 11 years old. draco making fun of harry for fainting at the quidditch game bc of the dementors and saying "shame [the broom] doesn't come with a parachute - in case you get too near a dementor." and harry replying "pity you can't attach an extra arm to yours, malfoy. then it could catch the snitch for you." 8/10 purely because he fucking MURDERED whiny bitch ass baby malfoy ha ha take that

the goblet of fire: a good amount of sass!! a healthy amount of sass! perhaps a bit held back though (come on harry get it together). rita skeeter annoying harry and asking for a word and jk rowling LITERALLY writing "'yeah, you can have a word,' said harry savagely. 'good-bye'" like FUCK he is canon savage in this book!!!! DAMN!!!!! and then he reks malfoy AGAIN "you know that expression [your mother's got], like she's got dung under her nose? has she always looked like that, or was it just because you were with her?" MOTHERFUCK GO OFF 9/10

the order of the phoenix: HOLY GRAIL OF HARRY'S SASS™. THE MOTHERLOAD. GOD DAMN. when vernon asks him why he's listening to the news again and harry replies w/ "well, it changes every day, you see." when hermione's warning him about picking fights w/ malfoy bc malfoy will make life hard for him and harry's like "wow, i wonder what it'd be like to have a difficult life" like fuck harry!!! tell us how u really feel!!!! literally ANY TIME he talks to an adult he doesn't like. sassing dudley left & right, putting him in his place w/ "this is night, diddykins. that's what we call it when it goes all dark like this" like fuck harry brought out the big guns w/ "diddykins". overall wonderful, truly. a good healthy teenage dose of sass. 100/10

the half blood prince: SHIT DO I EVEN NEED TO SAY ANYTHING EXCEPT "THERE'S NO NEED TO CALL ME SIR, PROFESSOR" LIKE FUCK. BEST PART OF THE WHOLE BOOK. OF THE WHOLE SERIES. FUCKING OWNED SNAPE HE'S FUCKIN REKT LYING ON THE FLOOR CRYING DRINKING SOME CHEAP ASS DISGUSTING ASS FIREWHISKEY. BREAKS THE GOD DAMN MOTHERFUCKING SCALE SO FAR OFF THE SCALE IT'S ON MARS. INFINITY/10. FUCK.

the deathly hallows: "it's time you learned some respect!" "it's time you earned it" sassing the minister of magic hooooooo boy. not much else bc harry's too busy like saving the world and shit. so extra points for multitasking and being an overall well rounded sass-er. 8/10

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“I tried to save the Shire, and it has been saved, but not for me. It must often be so, Sam, when things are in danger: someone has to give them up, lose them, so that others may keep them.”

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Dude, you just ran, like, 13 miles in 30 minutes.

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