aefindc-blog

[aefindc-blog]

Ch-ch-changes

I didn’t think being back would be hard. Moving.... extremely difficult, but actually being back, I was so excited for it. 

I suppose it was naive of me to think that I would come back and everything would just continue where it left off. And in a way, I supposed I really did think that would happen. In a lot of ways, it has, and in a lot of other ways it hasn’t. 

At the high school, I feel like if anything, I’m valued less for leaving for a year. I came back to one of the worst classroom situations, and no real plan for improving it. My schedule isn’t really ideal, and I’m a bit sad that I don’t get to teach all of the APCSA’s, my favorite class to teach. 

But I think after this year, I really did have a vision of what I want the program to look like at the school, and I was committed to seeing that vision through. 

That is.. until I feel either unappreciated or undervalued. I was invited to an invite only CS For All Summit in a couple of weeks. I had to get approval from administration since I would be missing staff development day and a day of school. They told me it was unlikely I would be able to go, which is incredibly frustrating. Pretty much anyone with influence in the CS K-12 Education community goes to this conference, it’s somewhat exclusive, and a big deal for a teacher to be invited. 

I’m trying my best not to make rash decisions based on emotional responses, but things like that make me feel unappreciated, and I’ve quit other jobs for less. The reality is, I don’t need this job. So I’m waiting to see if I’m still mad about it later before I start an exit plan. 

At least, UCI appreciates my experience and values it, so I’m grateful for that. 

Personally, coming back has been hard. I thought that my friendships would basically just pick up where they left off, and I’m finding that it’s not that simple or easy. I’m still trying to figure out how to get back to where I was, and trying very hard not be resentful and hurt by the lack of enthusiasm of my return. I get that my friends aren’t used to me being here, so they might not think to include me or make an effort to hang out, but it’s kind of lonely..... which just makes the other changes in my life that much harder. 

[aefindc-blog]

Lame Duck....

It’s an odd situation knowing that you have a limited time left. My mentor hasn’t really thought about giving me things to do that are long term because I will be leaving in 18 days. Luckily for me, I have had conferences this month and have managed to keep busy with my own professional stuff. 

So let me just jump into what has really been at the forefront of my mind... moving. I wasn’t this stressed moving to DC.... generally, I just had to remember to cancel everything before I left. Although it was a terrible experience living at the first place I moved to when in DC, going through all of this has made me so incredibly thankful for it. It really did make my transition to DC that much easier because I didn’t have to think about connecting a bunch of services, etc. 

Moving back has proven to be a huge pain in the side. There are so many little things I have to worry about, and trying to do everything remotely has been an absolute headache. I was able to find a place remotely, which was the biggest relief and blessing. I had to have friends view places for me, and they would video the walkthrough and send it to me. The place I ended up getting is month to month, so even if it’s a terrible place/situation, I can stay there while looking for a new place in the meantime. Rent prices have generally gone up since I’ve moved, so I can see myself just sticking it out at this place until I have enough money saved up to buy a place (I’m hoping that will be within the year). 

Anyway... the biggest issue I have found has had to do with car buying. They want you to have insurance before you can buy a car, well the problem is that I have to have a car to have insurance, and even more problematic, according to my insurance broker, is that my old insurance company doesn’t want to insure me since I had a lapse in coverage. 

So... my housing situation is basically 95% set, car... 0%. 

I felt confident enough about my housing to book a trip to Vietnam, and I am looking forward to a vacation. Especially when I think about the things I have to come. 

Thankfully I managed to get out of the math class, but with me getting positions as a NMSI consultant and an AP mentor, I know life will be pretty busy this next year. 

I am thankful for the Einstein Fellowship.. it has opened a lot of doors for me, and afforded me opportunities that may have been more difficult if I hadn’t participated. When people ask me if I would do it again, I say that I regret nothing, and absolutely would do it again, but if they asked me to stay another year, I would have to say no.... I’m ready to move back to California!

[aefindc-blog]

The Art of  the Deal

Some background, I have zero negotiation experience.... no.. let me take that back... I have zero successful negotiation experience. Well, mostly because I haven’t had to. When you’re a teacher, you don’t have to negotiate your salary (your wonderful union does that for you). I once bought a car by myself... that negotiation did not end well. They told me a price, I asked if they could do better, they said they would throw in floor mats, I bought the car :/

So you can imagine that with UCI coming at me with such a low number that I was so nervous they would say no to what I asked. And then.... is what you ask so outrageous that they deem you unworthy and move on?

I basically had to wait 5 weeks for them to come back with a number. So I had asked them to match my high school salary. In my mind, I was willing to accept that minus $5K, because I would have more time to pick up consulting jobs through the year. Wouldn’t you know, but they offered me $5,400 less. Well... close enough.... but then I asked them to get me into on campus housing and they would have a deal. 

So the ball is in their court, but it looks pretty good that I’ll get on campus housing. Obviously it’s not 100% official, but I feel good about where we are that I can finally breathe a sigh of relief, and finally call my school and figure out my schedule.  

So much more to figure out before I move back..... But one decision/step at a time. 

[aefindc-blog]

Passing the Torch

I have managed to do fairly well for myself, for having so many unknowns in my life. I would say that even though there usually is a lot of change in my life, I’m also a planner, and if I don’t know what that change is going to be far far in advance, I become anxious about it. 

But first, before I make it all about me again, I just want to say that my dear friend Sharon is going to be in Einstein fellow next year! They finally made official announcements about it last night. I could not be more thrilled (or surprised!). I think she’s a great fit for the team, and she will do a wonderful job. And yay... the Einstein fellowship gets another computer science teacher! We are roommates at reading, so I will have 7 days to fully share everything that has happened this year (maybe I will have to read back on my blog to remind myself). 

So... .back to me. I have about 2.5 months left in DC, and while that seems like a big chunk of 11 months, it will fly by so fast (mostly because out of those 2.5 months, I’m only in DC for 5.5 weeks... as always, I have a packed travel schedule). 

There are three major things that I need to figure out.... where am I going to live? What am I going to drive? And what is my work life going to look like?

The living and the car thing, I’m hoping will be easy enough to deal with closer to August, but the work thing is definitely weighing on my mind right now. I am excited to say that I was offered a full time lecturing position at UCI. This especially makes me feel good and wanted, considering my high school is giving priority for CS classes to my successor. I’ve mentioned this before, it’s not like I don’t understand why, but you can’t help but feel undervalued/underappreciated when they tell you they’d rather the new guy teach CS, and you can teach math. I know it’s not fair to push him out, which wasn’t what I was trying to do, but he’s also taught math in the past, so we are literally in the same boat. 

But back to UCI.... they offered me full time, which I wish I could be more excited about it, but nothing is official. They offered me $x, and I came back and said that I make $x + $20,000 at the high school, and I would be looking for something comparable, and in the ballpark in order for me to accept that. The department chair had to get dean approval, which would have only been another day, but then I get an email saying that my high school salary is much higher than other lecturers who have been there for years. So instead of just flat out saying no, they are going to try and give all other lecturers in the department a raise that would make all of our salaries more equitable. Unfortunately, this process, since it involves the University’s Academic Personnel, is a long, arduous, and bureaucratic process that will take another two weeks. 

And that’s where the decision tree gets a bit out of control.....

In my ideal world, I would have the full time job at UCI, teach my 4 sections of CS at the high school, and be able to transition out of the high school after this year. I’m eager to get back and work on projects outside of the classroom. I’m excited about outreach, policy, and PD, and I’m just hoping that by transitioning to a University position, it will allow more flexibility in my schedule to carry on and actually be involved in the work I feel I’ve started at the NSF. 

Passing the torch to another fellow makes it more real that your time here is done, but I’m looking forward to the future and it’s looking pretty bright. 

[aefindc-blog]

Time Flies When You’re Having Fun

I always think to write in my blog when I’m walking home. Too bad I can’t do an audio diary of my experience. Instead, you get the random dump of information. 

This past month has been pretty eventful work-wise. 

Interview Weekend

It’s a bit odd being on the other side this year. First of all, let me say that the weekend started off being a bit stressful as we had one of the windiest days we had since being here, so I got stuck in Chicago. My flight was supposed to leave on Friday, and Interview Weekend was supposed to start Sunday morning. Unfortunately, the airline wouldn’t be able to get me back in time, so I opted to take a 17 hour train ride from Chicago to DC (for the record, the train was delayed so in total it ended up being 18 hours). I could go on about the limiting and small amounts of travel funds, but that would be unique to my position possibly, and really a rant for another day. 

Anyway.. I made it back in time. It was my first time at Ted’s Bulletin (completely unimpressed), and at Momofuku (loved it!). But other than the dining, it really was about meeting all of the potential fellows. There were a couple I immediately connected with and a few that seemed a bit over the top. As much as you feel invested in who gets offered a position, the reality is, you don’t have to work with these people, so you can’t take everyone’s hiring so personally. The only thing you can do is hope that the future fellows uphold the same integrity and standards of all the other fellows so the name “Einstein Fellow” has something of worth when you are gone. 

But, I digress... the interview itself was puzzling to me. I almost wonder how I got the job. Obviously, I can’t talk about the process, but let’s just say that my top choice did not get it. It’s not really my decision to make. I think we all kind of look for someone a little bit like us, and once again, I don’t have to work with these people, so let the people who do make those decisions. 

PI Meeting

About a week after interview weekend, we had our PI Meeting. Talk about exhausting. There was an interesting “incident” that happened right before. During interview weekend, a lot of interviewees were asking me what my project was, which got me to thinking, I don’t have anything to stamp my name on and call my own. My mentor has kind of emphasized how important this was since the beginning, and through no real fault of hers, I never had the chance to say something was mine. I don’t know if I thought that was important enough to be competitive with the other fellows or to go rogue and create projects for myself, but looking back on the legacy you will leave or the impact you will make, it did make me feel bad and a bit worthless. 

This came to a head when everyone from our group was included on the agenda somewhere except for me. It made me feel like a non contributing member of our group, and that just made me really upset. It’s hard for me to be confrontational in situations where I don’t feel like I’m an equal, and I admit that I need to be better at office politics if I’m going to be working in an office. But in the end, the message was received by my mentor that I was feeling insignificant, and she did everything she could to rectify the situation. 

At the end of the PI meeting, I felt that I had contributed, and of course you bond a little more when everyone faces challenges together. 

ASCD

I think my favorite thing that happened last month was ASCD Empower Conference in Boston. 9/12 fellows attended the conference in Boston, and we had a blast bonding together. It’s so easy to get wrapped up in your “home life” that you don’t make an effort to really get to know or bond with the other fellows. Evan called me the “social chair” of the group, which is something I wear with great pride. It’s always been important for me in my personal life to maintain and grow friendships, so giving us opportunities to get together is important to me. 

4 of us started off the weekend with trivia at a nearby bar. We won two rounds, which I think makes us very worthy of the name Einstein. The only question we missed was a history question, and my only real contribution is knowing that Pitt Bull is known as Mr. Worldwide. 

Most of us went out the next night for drinks, where Evan was challenging everyone to a dance off, and we had a wild night of chasing down an injured ex-NHL player trying to get him help. There are so many fun stories from that night, and it’s kind of shame that it took us all so long in the fellowship to really let loose and have my kind of fun. The last night we all went to an Italian restaurant and had cannolis. 

I think I will miss this bunch.

Looking Ahead

Time is going to speed up, I can already tell. It’s still cold in DC (in April!!). I’m still waiting to hear about potential job opportunities. I have three weddings on the west coast. 7 more work related trips left. 

It’s going to go by fast, and although I’m so ready to move back to CA, there are things and people I will miss here too. 

[aefindc-blog]

Opportunity Knocks

I have moved into my new place, and it’s like.. a whole new experience altogether. I’m closer to all the “action” of DC, and I feel a little more like me. 

So now I can talk about the things that I actually came here for professionally speaking. This fellowship has opened up a lot of doors for me, and I’m thankful that I’ve had all these opportunities. The two that come to mind that wouldn’t have come around if I wasn’t here are my position on the ISTE Standards committee and the 100K in 10 Project Group. 

So my mentor was asked about contacts for the ISTE Standards Committee taht would be writing the Computer Science Educator Standards for ISTE, to be released this summer. She referred me, and I’m really excited to be involved in something at the national level. ISTE is the International Society of Technology in Education, and they have been primarily working with K-12 STEM teachers and administrators. Their goal is provide standards and support for educators. They currently do not have CS standards, and are in the process of writing those standards. As part of the committee, I will be doing literature reviews, data analysis, and draft writing of the standards. We have just gotten started, and we have a meeting next month in Portland to hopefully do the bulk of our work. 

The other group I got involved with is the 100K in 10. The goal of this organization is to support STEM teachers to increase the quality of their teaching. I am in a project group who’s goal is to increase the visibility of women in STEM (which is right up my alley, great fit). We met last month in New York, and we’re a smaller working group. Right now, we’re trying to get a landscape picture of what teachers use as resources and how they access resources. We plan on generating content material and redistributing currently existing resources to highlight women role models in STEM. 

Other great things that have happened outside of work since I’ve been here, I was asked to be a table leader for AP reading for CSA. I have also had two proposals accepted, one for CSTA, and another for APAC. I will also be doing a flash talk at SIGCSE for recruiting for diversity in the classroom. I’ve also made finalist for a lecturer position at UCI, and the more I think about it, the more I want it. 

All of these things that I have been doing have made me realize that if you want to make change, that you have to think outside of your organization. Don’t get me wrong, I have every intention of going back to the classroom, but you realize that it’s about more than just YOUR students, and you can’t reach the ones you never see unless you outreach and be a catalyst for change. 

I’m not sure what that will look like when I get back... but I finally get it. Looking back on my post from interview weekend.. I really do get it. Being back in the classroom won’t be the same because you feel as though there is some kind of injustice that you want to do something about. It doesn’t mean you’re too good to be in the classroom, or even that you like other things better... I love teaching, and like I said, I will be back, but I want something more for myself and for others. 

[aefindc-blog]

Moving on up

When people ask me about my time in DC, they ask me if I like it. My usual response is something like.. meh. After a particularly challenging day I had last week, where I found a mouse in my place, the Internet decides to die a slow death minutes before a webinar I was supposed to be hosting, the UPS man decided to not deliver my package because he couldn’t buzz in the building, and just getting word that the roommate I don’t get along with isn’t really moving out as promised, I made a decision that I was going to try to escape this situation. It really was the last chance for me to move, as I’m approaching the 6 months left mark, which is typically the minimum length of most leases around here. I looked back on this bad day, and realized that my source of frustration and unhappiness was tied to my living situation. Things at work are going well. I’ve had some amazing opportunities. I’ve started real friendships with my other co-workers, and there isn’t anything to complain about in that department. 

So when recounting my horrible, no good, very bad day to my co-worker, and agonizing whether I should really move out, she asked me a very important question. 

“Is your living situation ruining your DC experience?” 

The answer to that is a resounding yes. I have been “hanging in there” for months since I moved in, thinking that the really bad roommate would be moving out in December, thinking that things would get better after she left. The problem is, she didn’t leave, and had no real plans on leaving while I was still around. Granted, she is just one piece of the whole living situation, but certainly one of the harder pieces to ignore. 

I have found a quaint studio north of Dupont Circle. It’s furnished, 6 month lease.. and expensive. Part of me wishes I had lived there the whole time, maybe I would have been happier, but better late than never, and I am ecstatic for this move. Oh.. for the record, I was paying $950 for my private room and shared bath, all utilities including terrible roommates included. My new place is $1750 a month. At some point in your life, you recognize that money itself can’t buy you happiness but it can certainly buy you stuff that’ll make you happy :P

The other Einstein Fellows have been incredibly fabulous and 4 of them have offered to help me move my stuff caravan style across town. I am thankful that although my social circles aren’t as large as the ones I have in CA, that I still have friends that are willing to help out here. It makes me feel a little less lonely, because I am certainly homesick during this more challenging part in my program. 

I am eager to escape the pettiness, immaturity, and terrible-ness of my current roommates. This is truly a test of my patience and it is taking every fiber of my being to remind myself that this won’t matter in 3 weeks and to be better than retaliating or engaging. 

I am looking forward to things ahead, and for once.. I’m actually truly excited about being in DC!

Ax�}�=

[aefindc-blog]

Warming up and cooling down

You could probably sense the frustration in my last post, but I feel so much better now. It’s not because my situation has changed, it’s because I have adapted to my situation. My roommates are still.... a challenge to deal with and get along with, but, I have adjusted my expectations, and have accepted things that I cannot change (namely them). I don’t waste my energies trying to change things or argue about things, and for now, that keeps the peace. 

My frustrations with my co workers have subsided. My mentor has given us more defined roles and not left it up to us to compete for work or recognition. I like the way things are running right now, and I like my co workers personally. I’ve always liked my co workers as people, they are young, and fun, and have great energy, I was just feeling insecure about my place and my role, and in a way saw them as a threat. But now that we have more defined roles, I can enjoy them as people instead of eyeing them as some sort of competition. 

My day to day are best described as feast/famine. There are times that I have lots to do, but at some point, I’m waiting on responses of others and have nothing to do. Personally, I don’t mind that kind of working life. I’m not stressed, and although, I kind of feel “lazy”, I know there is nothing more I could be doing, and in the end, I’m productive. Right now, my big projects are organizing and planning our big events for the year, including the 100 teacher CS summit, our PI meeting, and our technical training workshops. I love event planning, so I enjoy doing things like that. It’s not only the logistics, but I also plan the kind of events and sessions for our meetings/conferences. As for the smaller things, my mentor constantly needs data or information to present to who I can only assume are important people with money, so I get to do a lot of research. I find that to be incredibly interesting, because I had no idea that there were so many resources for teachers. You don’t know what you don’t know, and it’s so interesting to find out about initiatives and programs for students, teachers, and parents. 

Another perk about my program in general, is that I get to choose professional development that I find interesting. Most of the things I attend, is computer science related that my mentor has either encouraged or required me to go. These are things I want to attend anyway, and it’s so great that I can considering this would never happen if I was in the classroom. It’s hard to attend things when you are missing work, locations can be difficult, and funding is a challenge. I appreciate this aspect of the program and think it might be one of more undersold benefits of the position. 

Almost three months have passed since I started, and it’s kind of quick how everything is moving. I’m already having to think about my plans for next year. I’m looking at applying full time for a teaching position at UCI, or having to decide whether or not to return to my home district. I have very mixed feelings about going back to the classroom. I miss teaching high school, and I miss my students. I also feel like this experience has taught me so much that would improve my teaching practices and utilize other resources more effectively. My hesitation 100% has to do with how I’ve changed here and how that will fit in with administration. 

After talking with a few administrators in my district, I get the impression that they are just ok with how things are. They believe they are already ahead of the game with their offerings of STEM/Computing courses and don’t really see the necessity for diversifying their classroom. They think that the access is there, and the underrepresented minorities are choosing not to access these opportunities, so that’s their choice. There is definitely unconscious bias at work, and I don’t know if I have the energy to always have to fight for and defend the underrepresented population, not because I don’t care enough, but because I am so passionate about it that it’s personal when people don’t respond or have the same passion for it. I don’t know if I have the energy to always have to deal with people who are stuck in their ways and constantly have to justify and defend doing things differently. I want to make a difference in a way that can be life changing, and I’m just not sure if that is my home district. 

I do miss home quite a bit still. I’m excited to get back, but maybe my home district is not where I will end up. I can understand a little better why teachers from the Einstein program may not go back. For me, I see it a little more, I’m in the trenches of social injustices, and you realize that you can only do so much, being a singular teacher in a school that is run by admins that might not see it the same way. If you want to even make a dent in the issues, you have to think outside the box/classroom. 

On another note, DC is cold, and I miss California, so I’m excited to be getting back to warmer weather for Thanksgiving!  

[aefindc-blog]

Master of my domain

I think the hardest adjustment for me through this whole experience is NOT being master of my domain. I used to live by myself, and be a teacher. What I said typically went, and how I wanted things is how it was. Other than occasionally having to compromise for parents and administration, I didn’t have to worry too much about doing things any differently than I wanted. 

Enter this experience... it’s been uncomfortable in a lot of ways, but everything is basically related to me having to compromise or consider actually working with others. 

My roommate situation has been difficult. Not only are they the way they are, but they struggle with communication and basic conflict resolution. I had higher expectations of how we should live, but I guess not everyone wants to live in a clean place, and I have to accept that other people have other standards of living and I can’t force my higher standard of living on anyone else. My room and area are comfortable, so that is the most I can expect from this situation. 

My job has been a bit of a struggle with the relationship department as well. I can’t help but feel a sense of competition with one of other fellows I work with (to clarify, not from my program, from a different program). I don’t like that feeling, and I don’t want to contribute anything to perpetuate the situation. I also have a feeling that it might just be me that feels that way, and it’s probably because I’m not used to having to compete to do the things I want to do. My resolution is to speak up a little more, and hope that my voice will be heard, respectfully and not aggressively. 

So challenges, yes... they make me a little more homesick, at the same time, I have no time to sit around and feel sad or sorry for myself. I have a limited time here, and there’s so much to do an experience. 

It’s good for me to be challenged... and yes.. it might decrease my happiness a little, but it does make me a better person in the end, even if I’m not master of my domain. 

[aefindc-blog]

Surprise!

This week has been a lot better than last week. Maybe I’m just in a better head space, and mentally prepared for the reality versus the expectation. Things at the NSF have moved ever slowly in terms of getting all my stuff. I finally got my phone today, which was the last thing I was waiting on. They just need to get my outlook to work, but at this point, I still have access to webmail, so I consider myself officially moved in. 

I have already dove in head first into my responsibilities. It’s not like you’re impacting major changes every day, but it does feel good to complete these assignments and projects and feel generally useful. I had so much work this week, that I actually got to delegate some work out. I feel confident that I know what I’m doing and actually can contribute to these programs. 

We got an especially nice surprise on Monday, when we were on a CS for All conference call, and Barack Obama was a guest and gave a little spiel about how computer science education is so important, and talked about how he participated in the hour of code and was hooked after. 

I was kind of in disbelief that this was my life. And even if it wasn’t the kind of conference call where I would speak up and say something, it was pretty cool and very much the highlight of my experience so far. 

Even though I’ve been here for three weeks, I STILL don’t feel moved in, and that’s because they have lost my last box. I’m very annoyed, and while majority of things in the box are replaceable (I THINK.. I can’t remember everything that I packed in there, and it was the biggest one I had), it’s not something I want to financially do. I am still obsessively calling them every couple of days, and I hope that they find it soon. 

[aefindc-blog]

Ridiculous Roommates

I admit that I’m not the easiest person to live with in that I’m not used to living with other people, and I like living my life a certain way. That being said, because I tend to get annoyed with other people easier that most, I myself try to be a model roommate and I’m extra aware of how what I do affects others. 

I have been living with these two girls E and A for 2 weeks now, and here is my airing of grievances. A little background.... E is actually very nice to me, her and A have been best friends since high school andthey are in their late 20′s. A basically likes to ignore my existence, and she likely has some animosity towards me because I gave her a hard time about taking the only mail key and leaving on vacation with it. 

In no particular order, here is what I’ve been dealing with since I moved in:

- Moldy.... everything. These girls had a loofah covered in black mold at eye level to them on the shower caddy, however, it occurred to neither one of them to throw it away (we’re talking chunks of black mold). I also had to throw out both of the bathmats which had black mold growing on the underside. 

- Dirty dishes... when I first moved in, there was definitely some weird smell I was on a mission to eliminate. I found a dishwasher of dirty dishes... but no dishwasher soap. Even though not a single dish was mine as I had just moved in, I went out bought dishwasher soap and ran the dishwasher. 

- Decomposing mouse.... the stuff in the hallway closet had been haphazardly stacked full of stuff so things were balancing like a weird game of Jenga. I took everything out and started to organize so everything fit nicely when I picked up the vacuum to find a dead mouse that had been dead for some time as it was half way into becoming one with the carpet. It concerns me that it was under the vacuum which clearly indicates that no one has touched that vacuum in a while. 

- House cleaning argument... After cleaning up after these girls for two seconds, I insisted that we either work out some kind of cleaning service or cleaning schedule for ourselves. I could tell E was hesitant spending money, and she said that we can all pick up after ourselves. I then had to debate with her why that wasn’t going to work.. in my argument... who’s going to clean the toilet? We don’t even have a toilet brush in the house.... when was the last time someone, on their own, scrubbed the toilet??

- Toilet paper roulette.... So I asked E what kind of system they had in place for toilet paper. She said that everyone had their own set of rolls in their rooms. This of course made no sense to me considering there was clearly a roll next to the toilet. I asked her who puts the toilet paper on the rack, and she says, whoever is the person sitting on the toilet when the paper runs out. I asked her what if one unlucky person is always the last on the toilet when this happens, that means they are always having to pay to replace the rolls. She didn’t have a good answer for that, and maybe heard how absurd it was when she said it out loud, ever since then, toilet paper has appeared in a communal place. 

- Band aid in the shower drain.... So I look over and I see a rather large band aid in our drain. We have one of those drains where you can lose stuff down it if you’re not careful, and there this dirty band aid is just sitting in our drain. I gave it a day, until I had to take a shower, and then, yep.. I had to fish the thing out and throw it away. How didn’t anyone notice that they WERE wearing a band aid before their shower, and it disappeared after?

- Mail key... there is only one mail key. And A decided to go on vacation and take the only mail key. In her defense, she was unaware it was the only one, but I had to wait about a week to get some important documents like my healthcare stuff. 

- Lights on.... and lights off. I feel like I’m constantly turning off lights around the house. Speaking of which, the lightbulb burned out in our half bathroom. Their solution to this was to not use that bathroom anymore. Roll my eyes... take one guess who had to buy new lightbulbs and replace them. 

- AC wars... for some reason A is constantly turning down the AC thermostat (and I am constantly turning it up).  At one point it was below 70 in my room... I should probably also mention that this was at night when it was below 70 outside. 

- Trash juice... today I took out the trash in the kitchen, even though I contributed none of the trash. I had taken out my personal trash the day before, but noticed that the trash cans were smelling, so I figured since both roommates were going to be gone this weekend, no one was doing it anytime soon. The trash bag was already dripping, and I made it outside before the bag broke and out rolls a half molded watermelon. I’m pretty sure the last time the trash was taken out was almost a week ago... when someone else took it out but didn’t replace the trash bag. I got back to the trash can and there was about an inch of trash juice at the bottom. Of course, being the responsible person I am, I cleaned it out with hot water and soap. 

- Visitors... thank goodness this will hopefully not be a recurring issue, but A’s boyfriend stayed over the first night she came back from vacation. Not only did I hear them talking (and more) past midnight on a work night, but the next morning, he decided to spend 40 minutes in the only bathroom with a shower we have. Of course I had to go to work, and I was not thrilled with this guy just hogging the shower when he clearly had nowhere to go. Later I saw him walking around in his underwear... no one wants to see that.. AND you don’t live here!

I’m pretty sure A hates me because I’m kind of demanding... but demanding a higher standard of living, and I can’t feel bad about expecting us to live in a clean, orderly, functioning house. 

Of course the “Harmony” strength doesn’t like conflict and it gives me anxiety to think A hates me... especially because her hatred isn’t productive. But it definitely makes me feel like I will be living by myself when I get back to CA.... 

[aefindc-blog]

First week at the NSF

There is a word to perfectly describe my week... challenging. It was a week where my patience and sanity was constantly challenged, because there was nothing about this week that was easy. 

There were a lot of challenges with starting this week: 1) Everyone in my directorate just moved to the new building Monday... I got there Tuesday 2) They weren’t ready for us with technology 3) my mentor was out 2 of the 3 days I was ready to start 4) I had no access to email, or any of our internal programs. 

Given all the challenges of the week, I still managed to be somewhat productive. I did my paperwork for my proposed travel, I started on a mapping project for the Gates foundation, wrote a workshop proposal for DC Stem Day, and helped another program manager with research for his keynote speech he was preparing. 

All this while having to visit IT 7 times, not getting a company issued computer, settling into one workspace to be told I had to temporarily move into another workspace for a few weeks when I would be able to move back, because of some bureaucratic nonsense, getting a phone number and filling out my paperwork for business cards only to be told a day later that my new workspace comes with a new telephone number which means I have to cancel my business card order. 

I was really trying hard not to get down about something that will be resolved shortly, but I think my week was challenging in other areas that I just wanted to cry because I feel so helpless right now. 

I still have one more box that has not arrived, and I’m getting frustrated that it’s not here yet. They can’t tell me where it is, and I just want to be all moved in already. 

I am having roommate woes... so much in fact that I am going to write an entirely separate blog entry devoted to my venting of the situation. 

At least I have friends and support here, and while the situations are challenging, and very frustrating at times, at no point have I regretted coming out here. I haven’t been homesick, even though I do kind of miss my friends from time to time. I know not every aspect of life is perfect or glamorous, and it’s just getting through this hump of settling in before I feel like I can actually enjoy this. 

[aefindc-blog]

Moving... and roommates

Although the actual move has been going really well, it doesn’t feel like it because I have been perpetually worried about where my stuff is in transit and when it will get here, and how will I get it, etc. Yesterday, I was able to pick up half of my stuff from the Greyhound bus station. I didn’t realize how close it was to me, and how much easier it was to just get an Uber XL to get it home, otherwise I would have opted for that option to begin with. Instead, they were waiting for all 9 packages to make it here before they were going to send it to me directly. I was getting impatient so I went yesterday to pick up my stuff. I rushed to get there because the lady on the phone told me the station closed at 5, so I stressed and practically ran there only to find that it really closes at 7. So like I said, things are working out, but I just get stressed in the meantime. 

I am still waiting on my 4 other boxes, and one of them is off the radar... so I pray that it’s not the box that contains my shoes. If everything is going the way it has, my shoes will be fine, but I will stress about it in the meantime. 

Having roommates is quite the adjustment. One of my roommates just got back from vacation yesterday, and I remember all the reasons why I don’t like roommates. Maybe it’s because her boyfriend was also here, but there’s talking until past midnight... “sexy sounds”, and her boyfriend was in the bathroom from 7-7:40 this morning. Maybe it’s just the boyfriend I have issues with, but regardless, now I’m forced to have this conversation with her, where I don’t know her but I’m broaching a subject where she could get very defensive. 

I’m considering my options and moving is one of them.. however.. this is a pretty sweet deal, and why should I have to move when she’s the terrible one? 

[aefindc-blog]

When in Rome... or D.C....

I’m officially a “DMV” resident... For the most part, the trip over was easy enough... well... I take that back because it was actually a bit of a pain having to haul around 190 pounds worth of stuff in the form of 3 suitcases, 1 duffel bag, and 1 backpack. I was staying with my friend E for the first night because my place wouldn’t be ready until the next day. E was coming home from work, and I had got to her place first. 

E’s place is pretty nice, with a lobby and a concierge. I had to make two trips to the lobby from my Uber because I had so much stuff. There was a bum being a public nuisance in the lobby when I was getting all my stuff to put down and wait. He was muttering random insults and threats, and I’m not exactly sure who they were directed towards, although there was only one other person waiting and the concierge. 

He was standing when I was moving all my stuff into the lobby, but he was either drunk or high and had to sit down so he plopped down on one of my bags. I didn’t feel immediately threatened by him, and I didn’t want to confront him right away considering I still had to wait for E to get home, and couldn’t make an easy escape. I let him sit on my stuff while keeping a close eye, and I don’t think he liked that at all. His mutterings seemed to be directed at me, but every time he rose his voice to be somewhat coherent, I would look the other way, hoping to avoid confrontation, until.... he hurled his sandwich at my head and missed by inches. 

Welcome to D.C. 

I had to laugh at the absurdity of it all, and in the end, he was harmless enough. He was escorted out by police, and my stuff was ok. 

Yesterday was my first night in my place. I don’t know if it’s just me, but all the hallways of the apartment buildings smell like someone’s cooking curry or stew. E’s hallways smelled the same.. but perhaps a bit better because they run the AC. My building doesn’t seem to get any kind of air circulation in the hallway, so it just smells bad. My apartment also smells weird.... My first order of business was to buy an air freshener. Now my room smells coconut fresh (hmmm... just like home)... but the moment I walk out of my bedroom door, it smells like I’m in a pet store. As soon as I officially meet my other roommates I will absolutely insist we hire a house cleaner. 

My first day of orientation was today. We never actually went around the room and did any kind of introductions, but I have already scoped out a couple of people who have no idea that I’ve earmarked them to be my new D.C. besties. At least that means I see potential relationships with these people and some of them I can see myself actually spending time with. 

The most valuable thing we did, in my opinion, was talk about our strengths from the Clifton’s strengthfinder test. I had a couple of revelations about myself while we talked about our individual strengths and how they present themselves. 

Well.. for one, I think people (especially people who knew me in college) would be most surprised to know that my number one strength is harmony. It basically means that I don’t like conflict. I think people would be surprised by this, because I tend to be very direct and somewhat confrontational if I perceive there to be a problem. I believe that people view my confrontation as combative and aggressive by nature which would seem far away from harmony. I learned that people who have harmony as their strength actually don’t like conflict if it’s not productive and they don’t see the practicality of arguing. I think the reason why I tend to be confrontational isn’t to be argumentative or create problems, but rather to address problems so a change or solution can be achieved. I admit that in my younger years, I wasn’t so tactful about confrontations which put people on the defensive, but at the heart of it all, I’d rather confront in order to resolve issues than be passive aggressive and resentful which isn’t productive for anyone. 

My second strength was analytical, which I found very interesting to know that people often perceive analytical people as negative and critical. It’s kind of interesting, but I have been told that I can be negative and critical, and sometimes for things that I have generally positive feelings about. I always wondered why people thought I didn’t like something (or someone) when I really did. The reason why analytical people are viewed as negative and critical is because we tend to question everything, not because we think there is something wrong, but because we want to understand how something works. 

Part of me has always felt very misunderstood by people, and learning more about myself actually makes me feel like I can help bridge that gap and help people understand me more since I understand me more. 

Oh.... and I finally cleaned out my Twitter to actually use it since EVERYONE here seems to use their Twitter often. I’ll attempt to tweet when I remember to. You can follow me @misshermans

[aefindc-blog]

Homeless for 10 more days

Currently, I am in Thailand. I’ve been here since the 3rd of the month. Even though people think I’m leading this super glamorous life of travel for pleasure, it wasn’t really meant to be that. Sure, I absolutely adore Thailand, what’s not to fall in love with between the $7/hr massages, amazing $2-$8 Thai meals, and the warm water which makes diving all the more enjoyable. But, I was on a mission, and that mission was to finish my SCUBA Instructor training so I can be a certified SCUBA Instructor. This meant 14 days straight of classroom, pool, and ocean work... homework... and yes, there was definitely lots of free time, but every night is a school night, so being the responsible student I am, my free time was mostly spent napping, studying or doing homework, eating, and sometimes treating myself to a massage. I’m not complaining that it was hard or terrible, but just farther removed from other people’s immediate thoughts when I tell them I was in Thailand for 3 weeks. 

While I’ve been here, I haven’t really turned on a TV (mostly because BBC is the only channel I’ve managed to find in English), and it once again reinforces the fact that I don’t need a lot of stuff in my life... to the point where I was seriously contemplating just throwing out everything in my storage unit. But let’s not get crazy now....

I actually haven’t felt homesick in the sense of missing my actual home... but I have definitely missed being around people. My cohort was really small, so there was one other retired guy also from CA doing the program with me. We have eaten all our meals together and bonded over our political viewpoints. While I enjoy his company, I miss my girlfriends, and actually female company altogether (they say diving is also an industry where women are severely underrepresented as well). It’s hard to keep up with home when there is a 14 hour difference, and the Internet here is so terrible that even doing simple things like loading email can take FOREVER. 

I think this was a good transition for me before the big move. I’m actually starting to get excited for the move. I’m already lining up races, compiling a list of things I want to do, and I people from the area I’ve met through work have been super supportive and have encouraged me to call to hang out. Believe me.. I will be! It also helps that I have a few friends in the area. 

So I get back to CA in two days, and I still have a lot to do before the actual move. 

- Get my stuff out of storage and to my sister’s house (where I’ll be staying for a week)

- Wait for the Greyhound Freight people to pick up my stuff to ship

- Go to the DMV (noooo!!!!) to get a copy of my title if my mail forwarding didn’t work. 

- Donate my car

- Cancel my insurance and change all of my addresses

- Paperwork for the NSF (technically this was due a week ago, but considering my access to technology including a printer and a scanner have been limited, they have ok’d me to turn this in as soon as I get back).

- Reimbursement forms for my move

- Pay for my new health insurance

There are a lot of little things you have to think about, and I wrote them all down so I can not only remember for myself, but give you an idea of things you have to think about during a move. 

So depending on my level of boredom, I might have one more post of other miscellaneous things before I’m actually IN D.C.!!

[aefindc-blog]

Moving sucks (you dry of $$)

Packing has felt like it’s been my full time job for a month now. Today was the big move into storage. I had a bit of a meltdown moment yesterday as I was putting my mattress in a bag. The thought occurred to me.. It will be a year before I sleep in my bed again. It’s the idea of MY bed. I know I’m not exactly living in a suitcase for a year, but the bed, the furniture, everything but the clothes on my back isn’t mine. I won’t be surrounded by the comforts of my home or my stuff, and that was kind of a sad thought for me.

I was able to condense almost all of my belongings to a 10′ x 24′ storage, which believe me, was more than I needed (but I got a really great deal, so why not). 

The move itself was fairly painless, although, I would like to rant a bit about the financial situation of it all:

A current fellow told me that last year, she was trying to move from Michigan to D.C. and she was quoted $3,000 for a commercial move.... ONE WAY! She rented a one bedroom apartment and was furnishing and bringing all or most of her belongings.  The problem is, you only get reimbursed for $3,500 for BOTH ways. Needless to say, she ended up renting a U-Haul and moving herself. 

I was fortunate enough to get a furnished place, so I could ship the stuff that I needed, because none of it was furniture. I was hoping that I would get reimbursed for the relatively inexpensive move to a storage unit, but after all that time, I ended up being denied. So here’s the financial situation....

ORISE reimburses you up to $3,500.... 

If you hire commercial movers, which WILL be reimbursed, you spend 2 x $3,000 = $6,000 - $3,500 = $2,500 the cost to you. 

If you hire local movers to move your stuff into storage, you spend 2 x $500 = $1,000 the cost to you. 

Side Note: (ORISE will cover shipping my boxes, which I found the cheapest out there was Greyhound Freight. $400 for shipping 10 boxes and up to 300 pounds door to door service. I haven’t sent it off yet, but I expect it to be a lot cheaper because you are essentially paying per pound and I do NOT have 300 pounds worth of stuff). 

So yes, the cheaper option if it’s available to you is to just to pay to put stuff into storage. I just find it terribly unfair that I found a way to keep my moving expenses under $3500, but that because the move to storage is less than 50 miles, I get penalized for it. And if I actually moved all my stuff to DC that it would cost me more in the long run. 

Yes, I’m on a soap box here, but I feel like to be fair, they should offer either 1) increase the amount to be reimbursed to cover the ACTUAL cost of moving to DC (and they wonder why west coasters are hesitant to apply) or 2) allow for creative means to keep the move under the amount they give you and not be so ridiculous about approving expenses. I’m not cheating the system here.... I live by myself, and I’m truly not somehow moving a bunch of other people’s stuff into a storage unit and writing it off. 

So... while the moving is for the most part done, I can’t help but have a bit of a bitter taste in my mouth from having to fork over the cost of moving. Don’t get me wrong... I’d happily pay out of my own pocket than move myself.... this is a throw money at the situation and be happy it’s done... I just wish it weren’t MY money. 

[aefindc-blog]

Standing Still (Because moving hasn’t been approved yet)

I am a bit frustrated with the relocation agent who is supposed to be helping me figure out my move. I have done the research, and sent her a specific plan to be approved, but it has taken 3 weeks, and I have yet to hear from her. If I had been waiting all of this time to start packing, I would be in serious trouble. Without approval, it’s not guaranteed that anything I do will be reimbursed, so I’m just putting a lot of faith in the approval process, and hope that the amount of time it’s taking for them to get back to me is no real indication of complications of the process. 

In any case, I have about 3 weeks until I need to be moved out of my place. All I can say is... .scary!

On another note, I have unofficially begun my role as a fellow. I talked my way into an invite to the AP Computer Science Principles teacher summit. I am very glad I went, because I got to make new connections with new CSP teachers, and I was able to get a feel for the concerns regarding College Board’s scoring of the AP exams. 

Not to mention, I got a lot of Facebook swag.... 

More on the meeting later... for now, I’m enjoying a bit of time at home.