aetherfreak - Tumblr blog

[aetherfreak]

Rhea Ripley - RAW, Jan. 24, 2022

[aetherfreak]

Lesbians will be like an I perpetuating harmful lesbian stereotypes by experiencing sexual attraction to women 🤔🤔

[aetherfreak]

The masculine urge to put on a skirt

[aetherfreak]

bdsm enjoyers r onto something. i think we should incorporate aftercare into just hanging out. i need a buddy to hold me and say “that was really fun and you seemed normal”

[aetherfreak]

this is annoying

i just read an ask (not mine) that was ‘why do you do xyz to subs?“ and dude answered, “because they hate it.”

i cannot STAND the idea that we (subs) are supposed to hate the things that are done to us. i do this shit because i crave it. i need it. i love it. it connects me to a partner in ways that vanilla relationships don’t. it makes me feel strong and confident and joyful.

i get that not everyone is like me, not everyone does kink in the same way, but this concept that ‘subs should be pathetic and miserable’ is damaging to the kink community in the long run, and damaging to new people exploring this side of themselves, and damaging to the individual. it feeds actual abuse and mistreatment, and makes people reluctant to stand up for themselves.

it also feeds the stereotype that kink is all just pretend roleplay. it can be, roleplay is a thing that some people enjoy, but if you are *actually miserable* then it’s not roleplay. if you are *actually miserable* then it’s not kink.

if you do not derive joy from however you structure your sex life, then please keep exploring, keep moving forward. communicate openly about what you like and want. and do not be afraid to stand up for yourself.

[aetherfreak]

Does dick size matter ?

Yea, if you’re a really big dick we can’t be friends. Sorry. Kind men only.

[aetherfreak]

Sometimes a writing post on here will be like…. So far beyond basic and still befuddlingly miss the mark…. Like…….

Um also, hello!

[aetherfreak]

rb this to give the person you reblogged it from fangs

[aetherfreak]

covered in blood for sexy reasons

[aetherfreak]

Do you have any kinks?

That second sleep after you’ve woken up too early

[aetherfreak]

New Print Out!

Oh ya before I forget I got a new print design out! Instagram was clamoring for it so I digitally cleaned ‘er up and got it available for sale. I still gotta pick em up from the printers but the listing’s available to buy from today 

[aetherfreak]

[aetherfreak]

Being called a freak gives me the gender euphoria actually

[aetherfreak]

“retraumatization through media is not a healthy coping mechanism and exposing yourself to something that idealizes, sexualizes, and/or romanticizes your trauma is not exposure therapy.”

I’m just gonna copy and paste it. And actually now I have to talk about it. Here’s the thing, knowing the OP is an anti makes this post actually fucking stupid and twisted and intentionally vague for brain warming reasons, so I’m going to give you a true take.

What I assumed OP was talking about was finding media where people experience what you went through, and re-experiencing it in an unguided way, on your own, outside of a community, or just specifically Alone. In a setting where you are consuming triggering content created by someone you don’t know, you have no control and your body knows that. Even if you do know the person, if you aren’t Very far along in your recovery, even that will likely make you feel like you aren’t in control. Feeling out of control while being triggered is literally how retraumatisation happens. Either of those WILL retraumatise you and it isn’t health.

But knowing this person is an Anti, they are probably suggesting that writing stories or creating media, which includes your trauma, is the same as the above thing.

You absolutely do NOT want to spend very much time in someone else’s trauma while you are recovering. It will set you back and it will make processing your own trauma extremely confusing.

But creating your own media which is about your trauma is ABSOLUTELY a way for you to externalise and reprocess your experiences in a healthy way. Especially if you can package that trauma into an analogy that allows you to share your emotional experience with people close to you. In fact, you can use kink in that way, and In Fact, I have used my writing, my 12 year old primary setting, as an outlet for reprocessing my trauma by writing about it and it’s EXTREMELY helpful. In particular, it makes me feel EXTREMELY in control of the things that have hurt me and makes compartmentalisation DRASTICALLY easier.

But sometimes people need to externalise their experiences in ways that are truly horrible to look at, and they still Need to do that to get the emotions out of their body. That is not in itself unhealthy, but it is a kind of therapy, which means that in order to actually help, it needs to be done in a disciplined and deliberate way.

Don’t attempt any kind of therapy on yourself ALONE! Don’t attempt any kind of therapy on yourself without people who you trust around. Every kind of therapy no matter how minor seeming, has the capacity to unravel bits of your trauma that you may not be ready for. Always seek supervision and support by someone you can trust.

But also, intentionally exposing yourself to triggering content that you have no control over , ESPECIALLY if it was created by a stranger to you, has the propensity to harm you Severely. Even with supervision, it is almost always harmful, and isn’t exposure therapy. It can even lead to horrifying situations of becoming trauma bonding to a stranger who doesn’t even know you exist.

Just Don’t reexpose yourself if it isn’t coming Directly from your head, and if you’ve made significant progress, then maybe you can hear personal stories from people you know and trust. Just Don’t ever expose yourself to triggering material produced by a stranger. Just simply don’t. It will hurt you.

Oh but also regardless of justification people can write whatever they want and they don’t owe you an explanation.

Also don’t ever reblog this I have no interest whatsoever fielding questions from antis who think a moralistic surveillance state is an acceptable way to “protect” people, I will never ever be in the mood for that and my mental state is barely holding on by a fucking thread. So just don’t. This is post is for you lucky few. If you want to paraphrase me without credit, go ahead.

[aetherfreak]

8. Without even having a reason

It’s OK to Say “No” …

1. If you don’t want to do it …

2. If you don’t like the people …

3. If you’d rather relax …

4. If you’re already overscheduled…

5. If you don’t have the time …

6. If it doesn’t fit your values …

7. If you feel forced to say “yes” …

[aetherfreak]

....😶

[aetherfreak]

You don't have to have a "reason" to not want to do something. You also don't have to have some overwhelmingly negative reaction to doing that thing. If you don't want to then that's all there is to it