agbawriter

[agbawriter]

I am at an event where they are serving leaves, not efo, sandwich, not eba, and coffee, not zobo. Egba mi

[agbawriter]

You hold certain beliefs because you were told that's the belief you should have #beliefs

[agbawriter]

Sometimes life feels like a dream. Something that's not really happening but is also happening.

[agbawriter]

The love I yearned and burned for is here, and I'm ignoring it again.

Continuously wondering whether it is good or not, whether it's safe or not.

[agbawriter]

I have asked the Lord to teach me what love is. That way, I can understand what this is.

[agbawriter]

Silence hurts

[agbawriter]

Alọkólónkígbe (the àmì might be wrong) - the one who leaves and an owner shouts.

I learnt the meaning of this by shouting that now the head hurts like mad.

[agbawriter]

Maybe this our love na one way, and I don't have your heart it has gone away......

[agbawriter]

Don't lock me out, ololufe mi. Let me know what's going on.

[agbawriter]

I'm not perfect and yes, I'm not the perfect one for you.

Up and down, left and right, side by side, I have toyed with our emotions.

Damned the pain I felt while hurting you.

Now, I'm useless to you when you need me the most

[agbawriter]

Hello, my love.

Yes, I'm not your safe space, and I get it. Please don't shut me out at this time. I can be here for you now and maybe that's the only thing I'll be good for.

[agbawriter]

Preferred

If you have siblings, do your parents have a favorite child? If they do, what bias do they show?

For me, if I'm the favourite child, it is probably because I'm stupid.

[agbawriter]

I watched Umjolo ; The Lost one on Netflix today. It took me a while to grasp the first scene. The women had a beautiful song accompanied by their beautiful neck, wrist and waist pieces. They have no chest piece - they bared their chest.

Coming from a culture where parts of the female body are heavily sexualized, it took me a while to move past it. To move past it, I used knowledge of anatomy where the breast of a woman are only different because of the presence of mammary glands. Apart from the glands and the function of the female boobs it wasn't different from the male chest and so the women's breasts were not sexualized. It was normal for them.

The big question that then came to mind was that if in the South African Zulu culture women's breast were not considered different or something to be covered, what then makes it immoral to see a woman's breasts in my culture? Also, it means that morality when it comes to dressing has no standard rule.

Comparing this culture with my Nigerian culture, there is an obvious stark difference. In my culture once young girls hit puberty, they are socialized to see in way to protect themselves from men. Women are deemed immoral just by what they are wearing. While in Zulu culture, none of that comes to play.

In conclusion, unnecessary meanings are attached to women's bodies. The concept of being indecently dressed is due to the meaning that we humans attach to anatomical structures.

[agbawriter]

Maybe we can try again soon

[agbawriter]

My heart

I miss the one I gave my heart to. I wish I didn't have to let go.

[agbawriter]

Daddy daddy

She woke up on Sunday afternoon startled. What a nightmare! The one she loved had died in the dream. Tears began to flow. The loss of another is too much to think about. It was not real but the depth of the pain was to much to fathom. If the hypothetical loss was that big, what about the actual event? Don't even think about it!

[agbawriter]

Anxiety

Spent the last few days wondering what if, maybe and how.

Spiraled and wondered what would have happened

if I said, I did this and that

maybe that and this, here and there.