aita-cat-owner

[aita-cat-owner]

Hi it's me. Sorry if people were offended by the "born wrong" comment, I'm not a native English speaker and didn't take into consideration how it'd sound bad in English. So that's not me being ableist I genuinely didn't know it'd be bad. I'm not against autists or neurodivergent people for things they can't control but I sent this ask about a week ago and my mental headspace was really bad at the time since the grief over my cat was very fresh. The reason why I was left alone with my cousin to begin with was because my mom was also supposed to be taking care of him but she popped out for a second to buy something real quick, and since I've babysat for my cousin many times before I was fine with this. I honestly don't think this situation has affected my love for him. I'm miserable and sad over the gruesome loss of Velvet but I know it's not his fault since he wasn't aware of what he was doing. Mostly I just used aita's asks as a way to vent but also because I was worried that I was too cruel to him. I understand my EMOTIONS were very fair and valid but my reaction was over the top and harmful to a child especially an autistic one. I'm not fucking ableist, stop being weird and mean to me in the notes. I consider myself relatively mature or normal for my age but I'm also very much just 15 years old and this has been a lot to deal with. I didn't mean to potentially upset anyone and if you actually think this ask was ableist because this IS what some neurodivergent kids do, you need to reevaluate yourself. I myself have moderate adhd and I've taken meds for some other complications that it's given me, but we need to understand that people who can still live their lives with mental disabilities like me and others are very, very lucky to not have turned out that way. It's sad, but it's the cold hard truth of life. This doesn't mean I disrespect those people and it doesn't mean others should either! Jesus fucking Christ.

Also, as for personally not witnessing the act, I don't know if this is okay to mention but our house's salon has cameras just in case thieves come and we checked it and yeah, he yeeted my baby. Maybe that's a horrible choice of verbs but he did just kind of throw Velvet out the window and just stare after him.

My family is not ableist either; they've all been pretty... neutral to my cousin and my aunt does adore him. The issue is that they all sided with him over me, minus my mom after a day or two. Animals/pets are very irrelevant to our culture here.

AITA for banning a child from my house?

It's not my child, btw- it's my cousin, an 8 y/o autistic boy. I am 15 and it's technically not my house.

For context, my cousin has EXTREMELY severe autism, to the point where he quite literally cannot form any connections with people and does not sit down at all. He is always running around, yelling in garbled speech, and doesn't understand words, sentences, or commands. He only responds to his name when his mother calls it. He isn't intelligent mentally, either. I do love him a lot in spite of how he has never paid attention to me or treats both me and everyone else around him as though they don't exist.

I have (had?) a cat. I have raised this cat for 3 years and I got this little furball when he was only 2 weeks old. I gave him milk and cared for him so, so much. He was a Persian-British mix and was, frankly, pretty dumb and sleepy all the time. Like a little doll.

My cousin also, apparently, decided that my cat, Velvet, was doll-like, because he grabbed Velvet and refused to let the cat go. I was in the bathroom at the time and only heard the cat's mewing. Nobody else was home. My cousin thought it would be nice to throw Velvet out of the window. Our 4th-story window. Velvet was a spoilt little thing and had never really lived outside of a house, and consequently, died. My cousin? Didn't care. Just went away from the open window and went back to running around the house.

I came out only a few seconds later and was very confused as to just WHERE was the previously mewing cat, and obviously I couldn't just ask my cousin, since he can't talk and wouldn't be able to think of it either. My mom found the fucking CORPSE when she came back home. I was horrified and, while I don't think this was the proper thing to do to a little boy who has absolutely ZERO awareness of his surroundings, I proceeded to absolutely scream my head off at my cousin while grabbing his arm, which resulted in an absolute meltdown from him and my aunt (who had also just arrived) having to physically pry me off him as I was crying. I don't think I can be really blamed for being upset over my cousin KILLING my BELOVED PET just because he was born wrong. I also sort of yelled at my aunt to never come here or bring her son here ever again. My mother has severely chastised me for that and had ME grounded. What the fuck. Mental illnesses aren't all sunshine and rainbows, y'all. Ugh. I feel like I AM the asshole, but honestly. Consider the circumstances. I hate it here and I miss my fucking cat.