alberto-balsalm
alberto-balsalm
bubbly bubbly bubbly
38K posts
An Old - He/him or they/them
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alberto-balsalm · 18 hours ago
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Derailing my GM when they try to do a gazebo bit by having my character pipe up "actually, I think that's a rotunda".
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alberto-balsalm · 18 hours ago
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‘Twas brillig, and the slithy toves A stately pleasure-dome decreed. And what rough beast, its hour come round at last, Could frame thy fearful symmetry?
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alberto-balsalm · 18 hours ago
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i feel strongly about this
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alberto-balsalm · 19 hours ago
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You may have heard that giraffe and their closest cousins, the okapi, can lick their own eyeballs.
Both species have got super long tongues and this makes sense in theory but... sometimes you have to see it how it actually works to believe it's a real behavior.
There's no grace involved. It's nothing like the ethereal, fae-like aesthetic these guys have most of the time. They just yeet their tongue backwards out of their mouth and bounce it off their face, repeatedly. It cracks me up every time I see it.
This is Sekele, at the Denver Zoo. Enjoy.
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alberto-balsalm · 19 hours ago
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alberto-balsalm · 19 hours ago
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alberto-balsalm · 20 hours ago
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I took my little brother (autistic, mostly non verbal) out and he was using his voice keyboard to tell me something, and this little boy (maybe 4 or 5?) heard him and asked me "Is he a robot??" I tried to explain to him that no, he isn't a robot, he just communicates differently, but my darling brother was in the background max volume "I am robot I am robot I am robot I am robot"
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alberto-balsalm · 20 hours ago
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huge shout out to this little kid for writing my favorite poem
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alberto-balsalm · 20 hours ago
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this guy
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reblog if you agree
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alberto-balsalm · 20 hours ago
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alberto-balsalm · 21 hours ago
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alberto-balsalm · 21 hours ago
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accidentally soaked a gopher today... not a joke or innuendo. Poured a five gallon bucket over a tree where our irrigation system is shut off and this thang hopped out of the ground.
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He's big mad now too
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alberto-balsalm · 2 days ago
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was thinking about bear/bare
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alberto-balsalm · 2 days ago
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RIP Richard Serra. You made so many people so so so mad
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alberto-balsalm · 2 days ago
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I have seen a new Hazard Sign. It’s… very specific:
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[enhance!]
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a warning against a bird party?
Worm time!
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alberto-balsalm · 2 days ago
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If I was a mage in the dungeon meshi universe, I'd figure out how to enchant living paintings and then commission some artists to paint me a bunch of pictures of magnificent feasts. Then I'd rent out a gallery space and charge entry to my Magical Food Hall, where you can eat as much of anything you want and not experience any of the consequences. Think of the possibilities. I'm not just talking about calories and weight loss here. I'd have a painting of a bakery where gluten-free people can gorge themselves on bread and cakes and then leap out of the painting before the vomiting sets in. I'd have an ice cream parlor for the lactose intolerant. One painting is just called "The Allergen Feast" and is a table laden with things like nuts, soy products, shellfish, etc. I'd have a painting of a county fair with the most insane types of fried food imaginable. I'm planning an expansion, but first I gotta consult some religious experts to see if eating imaginary painted food that isn't kosher/halal is technically against the rules or not.
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alberto-balsalm · 2 days ago
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Btw, that idea that privilege makes you morally evil and suffering makes you morally good is just repackaged versions of the Christian concepts of the evils of luxury and the holiness of martyrdom. Hope this helps!
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