alice-electric-dreams

[alice-electric-dreams]

The Terror of Being Alive. (My morning Existential Crisis Documented in real time)

Content Warning:Not for children under the age of 18.May contain talk of suicide, suicidal ideation, death and non- existence.The writer is not a mental health professional or expert.People suffering from suicidal thoughts or ideation are advised to seek professional help.Reader Discretion is advised. I’m terrified I’m constantly terrified.Always at the corner of my eye When i turn around Dark…

[alice-electric-dreams]

MISSING. (CHAPTER 1)

The sky was clear; blue and cloudless. The wind at the top of the mountain was hauling into my ears. It was like nature was mimicking my thoughts. I wanted to be as far as I could from everyone so I kept climbing. My toes throbbed as I kept slipping and bumping into rocks. I hadn’t gone home to change into hiking shoes. My school bag now felt like a burden on my shoulders. I almost abandoned it…

[alice-electric-dreams]

SHIRO AND KURO.

In the beginning of time, there lived two great gods; Shiro, the god of light and Kuro, the god of darkness. They wanted to create a perfect world, however, the world they made was full of chaos. Kuro’s darkness consumed Shiro’s light and nothing ever flourished. In order, to achieve their dream of a perfect world, Kuro consumed all the darkness and the world’s evil and imprisoned it in his…

[alice-electric-dreams]

083. By the train tracks.

Every time the train passes I am reminded of you Your scent fills up the air And I can feel you standing next to me I’m taken back to that moment When we hid behind the noise Of a passing train to steal embraces I remember your face Wide with surprise When I closed the distance between usI remember the trembling I had to hold on to your waist To stop myself from falling I remember the excitement…

[alice-electric-dreams]

Apple of Freedom.

The sun sets over EdenAnd a shadow looms over the gardenWe rush to our little havenFar from the prying eyes of the wardenWe lay somewhere unseen, hiddenUnder the thick leaved treesWith blue moonlight kissing the tipsOf our intertwined toesAll the stars shining for no one else but usTheir light illuminating every inch of the garden. Every inch, but us. I do not need the light of the starsThat…

[alice-electric-dreams]

Creature of the night.

I guess my days of slipping through the cracks are over. My days of going unnoticed like a calm wind through open windows. Now when I pass people see me, they stop me and ask questions like ” Who are you?” And “Where are you going?” And because I’ve lived in the darkness all this time, I have no polished answers to such questions. I merely look behind me to see if there’s someone else there that…

[alice-electric-dreams]

Fever Dreams.

I passed youAnd you looked at meAs if you didn’t believe i existedOr that someone like me existedPink dreads and waay too many face piercingsRich black skin and plump cheeksDeep black eyes and a sly smileFrom the corner of my eyes I saw youI swayed my fat hips and short legs away from you, but you still looked.It’s been days but I remember that lookThose eyes that lingered on meLonger than any…

[alice-electric-dreams]

082. Sisyphus at the top of the mountain

I’m almost at the topWhen the boulder slips from my handsAnd rolls down the mountainI chase it to the foot, as I always doAnd the journey up begins againThis time, the boulder is a little heavierAnd my back, a little stifferMy hands tremble, my legs shakingAnd my shoulders cry out in painMuscles tearing from exhaustion“Just one more time” I lie to myself“One step at a time” I encourage the…

[alice-electric-dreams]

081. From the dark corner in my room.

I sit at some dark corner of my roomWatching the world from my screenThe people in it, they moveThey shout and say what is in their heartsThey read books and learn thingsThey make friends and go dancingThey get angry and throw fistsThey change the worldFor better or for worseThey believe in God and they kill godThey have a purposeThey feel everything in their bonesAnd scream it from the top of…

[alice-electric-dreams]

The Demon's Child.

The Demon. Angels were never meant to procreate, but when Lucifer fell from heaven, his body underwent many changes. He lost his beauty, his grace, his angelic wings, among many things, and I suppose in all those losses, he must have gained something. For when he laid with a woman for the first time, for reasons only known to God and nature, he sired a child. A little girl, and this little…

[alice-electric-dreams]

The Runaway.

The Runaway. It’s 7:00am on a Sunday morning and the train to the city is almost empty. I chose this time specifically because I anticipated it to be so. I am running away. Away from home, away from everything I have known, everyone I love, away from myself. I wish to be someone else, somewhere else. I will alight the train at somewhere completely unfamiliar. Somewhere the weather differs from…

[alice-electric-dreams]

It was nice seeing you again...

I dreamt of you again tonight. I can’t believe that my life has gotten to the point that I look forward to seeing you in my dreams, because it is the only place I can be with you. In this dream, like in all of them, you walked, you talked, you were alive. You held me, and you pat my head, and I felt loved. It’s funny how casually you appear in my dreams, as if my heart wasn’t shattered by the…

[alice-electric-dreams]

I wouldn't dream of more

Her lover? No, i dared not dream that muchI only ever wished to be the gentle breeze That blew against her hairSwimming in her sweet scent And kissing her delicate face. I wished to be the ground beneath her feetTo hold her steady as she stood To take her to all the places she wanted to go And keep her firm as she twirled all around me. I wished to be the patch of grass she lays onAs she stares…

[alice-electric-dreams]

Let it happen

I lay awake at nightStaring at the starless sky The weight if the world too heavy in my shoulders I wounder if i have any right to feel as miserable as i do I float in an ocean of my tears Every passing second another reason for me to give upI weep at the inevitability of my mortality And the increasing probability of me bringing about my own demise “i hate myself” “i hate the world” Maybe if i…

[alice-electric-dreams]

How silly you were...

This is the playlist you listen to When you love someoneThat doesn’t love you backThis is the book you read When you miss someone That doesn’t think about youThis is the poem you write When you can’t stop thinking about them Happily living their lives Without you. When you can’t stand being away from them Every piece of you screaming for them You get lost in the memory Of when they were with…

[alice-electric-dreams]

Safety blanket.

I was alone I wanted to reach out to someoneAnd lose myself in them Maybe then i could forgetAll the things that i hated about myselfAll the things wrong with the worldIn their embrace, i would not have to thinkI would not have to rememberAll the ways in which i was hurtMaybe they could shield meFrom my nightmares If they could touch me Maybe i could forgive myself If they could accept me Maybe i…

[alice-electric-dreams]

Rejection.

Rejection comes in many waysSometimes it’s locked doors and shut curtainsOthers it’s unanswered texts Sometimes it’s unopened letters That scream indifference And sometimes it’s silence A silence so loud and unmistakableIt crushes you under it’s weight The thing about rejection is that It does not matter why you get it You always end up questioning yourselfYour worthYou spend hours staring in the…