alitanyofcosmic
alitanyofcosmic
higher, further, faster, baby
4K posts
21 • girl w a lot of feelings
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
alitanyofcosmic · 4 years ago
Text
there’s something about the sight of steps leading down into the water. it feels like the ocean telling me to come home
174K notes · View notes
alitanyofcosmic · 5 years ago
Text
Everyday i get on here and make yall see things
83 notes · View notes
alitanyofcosmic · 5 years ago
Text
maybe i’m just projecting but i think there’s an inherent loneliness in living with a severe mental illness that makes you feel permanently estranged from others and long for the kind of connection where you feel completely understood and accepted, all while knowing other people have their own stuff to deal with or are just not equipped to ride out the worst of the illness with you. this leads to downplaying and/or hiding your symptoms as best you can, which takes even more of a psychological toll on you. this leads to not feeling loved as a complete person, and maybe not recognizing that love when it is present, or always fearing the day people have had enough and leave. even more so if this has already happened to you. it’s so exhausting and sad
17K notes · View notes
alitanyofcosmic · 5 years ago
Text
love me some enemies to friends to lovers trope
Tumblr media
112K notes · View notes
alitanyofcosmic · 5 years ago
Text
obsessed with how the wilds critiques bioessentialist feminism and the notion that women are inherently more anything than men but also dives deep into the cultural ramifications girlhood has on a young woman’s psyche and behavior. also obsessed with how it understands the complicated tension between girls and their moms. thirdly, i am obsessed with the way that, for all the show’s lack of subtlety in most areas, the power that men have over women just goes without saying and doesn’t need to be spelled out. no one has to explicitly state that it’s the patriarchy that gave that girl an eating disorder, or made that boy talk over a girl, or taught a girl to favor her dad over her mom, or taught that man that cheating on his wife was a harmless form of stress release. if you know you know, and the show expects you to know
409 notes · View notes
alitanyofcosmic · 5 years ago
Text
They better renew The Wilds because my mental state absolutely cannot handle a repeat of what happened with TBH. We deserve that enemies to lovers excellence.
580 notes · View notes
alitanyofcosmic · 5 years ago
Photo
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Toni before the kiss: 😠😤🤬 Toni after the kiss: 😊😘🥰
4K notes · View notes
alitanyofcosmic · 5 years ago
Photo
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
KNIVES OUT (2019)
Directed by Rian Johnson
Cinematography by Steve Yedlin
Aspect Ratio: 1.85:1
8K notes · View notes
alitanyofcosmic · 5 years ago
Text
139K notes · View notes
alitanyofcosmic · 5 years ago
Text
As a lesbian i will always relate more to trans women than cishet women. Made to feel disgusting and predatory in women's spaces? Check. Berated and mocked for our relation to sexuality and womanhood? Check. Hated for our "deviancy from the norm"? Check. Every single essay about womanhood by a trans woman--and especially, especially by trans wlw--has spoken more to me than anything written by a cis straight woman ever could. T*rfs can take that to the bank.
148K notes · View notes
alitanyofcosmic · 5 years ago
Text
gansey’s “and then we never speak about it again” with blue hurts so much more once you’ve agreed that he and adam kissed once pre-canon and settled on the same words
754 notes · View notes
alitanyofcosmic · 5 years ago
Video
When a random guy with a saxophone shows up to the club
337K notes · View notes
alitanyofcosmic · 5 years ago
Text
Maggie Stiefvater~Rant YA edition pt.2
I know, I know that I had to make a part about world-building but I’m pissed, I failed my exam I am at my friend house and it’s Fourth of July so I must do this.
Joseph Kavinsky.
First of all I don’t condemn his actions and yes, you can like a character but don’t agree with their actions.
My journey with The Dream Thieves was rocky, like really rocky. It was worse than The Raven Boys, I felt psychical pain while reading this one but there was only one good thing that help get through it AND IT WAS KAVINSKY.
From the first scene I liked him, I was intrigued by him and I was curious why Gangsey hates him so much. I mean what M*ggie give us are just rumours, that’s when I asked myself “Why such a hate? What did he do to them?”.
And then the yo mama jokes, priceless by the way. Okay, maybe my sense humour sucks but let me tell you in polish translation “twoja stara” is golden I laughed for several minutes.
But the thing went down pretty quickly, like my face went from a happy to grim in a second and stayed that way while reading this, just to cry at the end. After that it was just anger and to this day I’m angry at M*ggie for what she did.
Lets start from beginning.
1. Kavinsky-Description
The first time we see Kavinsky it’s in the chapter 3 where we got rumours about him:
“Of course it was Joseph Kavinsky, fellow Aglionby Academy student and Henrietta’s most notorious recreational forger. Kavinsky’s infamous Mitsubishi Evo was a thing of boyish beauty, moon-white with a voracious black mouth of a grille and an immense splattered graphic of a knife on either side of the body. The Mitsubishi had just been released from a month-long stint in the police impound. The judge had told him that if he was caught racing again, they’d crush the Mitsubishi and make him watch, like they did to the rich punks’ street racers out in California. Rumor had it Kavinsky had laughed and told the judge he’d never get pulled over again. He probably wouldn’t. Rumor had it Kavinsky’s father had bought off Henrietta’s sheriff. To celebrate the Mitsubishi’s release from impound, Kavinsky had just put three coats of anti-laser paint on the headlights and bought himself a new radar detector.“
Right from the bat, characters expressed disdain of him:
“I hate that prick,” Adam said.
Then we get the “description” of him: white sunglasses, golden chain, which already is kinda lacking but then we get the infamous “refugee face”
“He had a refugee’s face, hollow-eyed and innocent.“
Okay okay, so like it wasn’t already offensive, we learn later that he’s Bulgarian and as a person also from Slavic group, this description just looks bad and leaves bad taste in my mouth, because I’m fed up with Americans view of Slavs like we are all simple people, still in communist era somewhere in the Europe, who came to America to steal low income jobs.
On the other hand, how does “refugee face” looks like? Yeah, we get the line “hollow-eyed and innocent“ but it still feels offensive to Slavic group.
Luckily, in my translation it was changed to “runaway’s face” which holds the same idea but it isn’t offensive and fits Kavinsky’s character better.
“There was nothing about Kavinsky that wasn’t despicable”
Just… ugh why they hate him so much, I asked myself back then but I didn’t know that from this point, all went down hill.
“He was unmistakable: the sort of raven boy who was clearly an import from elsewhere.“
Okay first of all, you can import things, not actual people Blue. Second of all, combining this with “refugee face” it made me so angry like M*ggie, why can’t you describe Kavinsky normally without possibly offending half of Europe. He is human, not your new brand German car.
After that we get the rest of description “Like many of the other raven boys, he sported massive sunglasses, spiked hair, a small earring, a chain around his neck, and a white tank top.“ and that’s it. It’s all we get. There might be some things missing, like hair colour but we can forgive that.
2. Backstory
In M*ggie’s now deleted tumblr, she once wrote:
“Kavinsky has a very logical backstory that leads him to this place.”
And what did we know about Kavinsky? Practically, nothing. He’s a son of a Bulgarian mobster from New Jersey, he’s rumoured to kill his father, he’s mother is a drug-addict, he’s rich, Prokopenko is his favourite forgery and he got away with replacing him and possibly his dad. It gives the idea to what shaped him as a person but it doesn’t explained everything, like if he killed his dad, why wasn’t it? How did it ended up with him replacing Prokopenko? Why he is his favourite forgery?
But okay M*ggie say what you want but I and my friend made better backstory for him in ten minutes (like it wasn’t hard really).
3. ”We matter”
“Closing his eyes, Gansey leaned his head back on his seat, chin tilted up, throat green in the dash lights. There was still an unsafe sort of smile about his mouth — what a torment the possibility in that smile was — and he said, “There was never a time when that could’ve been you and me. You know the difference between us and Kavinsky? We matter.“
That said Gansey, the character we are supposed to like, about the kid who is not only his age but also drug addicted and possibly abused. I was furious at him for saying that because who k*rwa he is to say things like that. Is he some frigging higher being to judge someone like that?
And he was smiling while saying that? What an.. and nobody called him out on that?! It only gives the reader the idea that people like Kavinsky don’t matter and to those who relate to him that they don’t matter.
And Blue, who again made me want to throw my phone, later in the book asked  literal a hitman, who offered to go to “talk” with him to “make him feel worthless” while doing it.
It’s the next example when I felt the main characters are lacking a basic human empathy, like again he is just a kid not “H*tler” like Ronan compare him to.
4. That scene
That f*king scene, we all know about.”R*pe of Ronan” as stans like to call it.
I heard the reaction of the fans to this scene even before reading this books. Of course, I was anticipating this scene and when it came:
“After a moment, he heard the hood groan as Kavinsky leaned over him. Then he felt the ridged callus of a finger drag slowly over the skin on his back. A slow arc between his shoulder blades, drawing the pattern of his tattoo. Then sliding down his spine, tensing every muscle it moved over.
But when his eyes slitted, battling sleep, Kavinsky was just doing another line of coke off the roof, body stretched over the windshield. He might have imagined it. What was real?“
I was baffled, because its bad but its nothing like fans making to be. All Kavinsky does is drag his finger on Ronan’s back tattoo, while he is falling asleep but afterwards Ronan said he doesn’t know, if it was even real, so the reader can’t tell if it was. Somebody would argue, that is a molestation but once again, we don’t know if it was real. Maybe if we got K’s PoV we could get information about this situation but now we are left in the dark what really happened that night.
And then, there is “Consent is overrated” scene
This is one of the main argument of stans preaching that K is a r*pist. Yes, that sounds horrible, we don’t have to argue about that but people missed the context of situation in which it was said.
“Ronan replied, “Not such a thief tonight.”
“Some nights,” Kavinsky said, all teeth, “you just take it. Consent is overrated.”“
Ronan and Kavinsky are referring to pulling things out of dreams and how Kavinsky is doing it aka not asking permission to take them out, unlike Ronan. But without this context, the world “consent” is mainly associated with one thing. You know what…
The bottom line is that, if we got K’s PoV, it would shine a light on his intentions and motivations to say and possibly do all of this. We can only thanks the author for that.
5. Relationship with Ronan Lynch
Maybe that will sound scandalous but I don’t think Kavinsky loved Ronan. All of their interaction seem more like obsession to me and after the dreaming of Camaro, it seem desperate.
At the beginning, after main characters expressed disdain of K, only Ronan thought something different:
“Ronan knew he ought to hate him, too.“
And I thought “Okay maybe Ronan know more about him than the rest” but as the chapters went, I wanted the end of it all.
It was toxic. I know, I know but I was hoping for a least little glimpses of possible friendship. Instead of that, I got throwing over cars, punching and exploitation between them. With Kavinsky saving Ronan from the night horror (which fans forget about in their rants how bad K is) and helping Ronan dreaming a new Camaro, I expect at least some decency? gratefulness?? at Ronan side, because nobody forced Kavinsky to do this but when Ronan got what he wanted he just peace out?! Like Kavinsky was doing all of this as a favour?
“He rolled down the window. “I’m going.” For a moment, Kavinsky’s face was perfectly blank, and then Kavinsky flickered back onto it. He said, “You’re shitting me.” “I’ll send flowers.” Ronan revved the engine. Exhaust and dust swirled in a wild torment behind the Camaro. It coughed at twenty-eight-hundred rpm. Just like the Pig. Everything was back the way it was. “Running back to your master?” “This was fun,” Ronan said. “Time for big-boy games now, though.”
And
““I never lie,” Ronan said. He frowned disbelievingly. This felt like a more bizarre scenario than anything that had happened to this point. “Wait. You thought — it was never gonna be you and me. Is that what you thought?”“
And what was Kavinsky’s reaction after he was “used” by Ronan without even a thank you?
“Kavinsky made a gun of his thumb and finger and put it to Ronan’s temple. “Bang,” he said softly, withdrawing the fake gun. “See you on the streets.”“
Not anger but disbelief about what just happened and then the “he said softly“ just seems sad to me. He got used by the man he, de facto, wanted to befriend. He for sure felt cheated and used but the next thing what he does seems just OOC for me. He kidnapped Matthew, Ronan’s younger brother, to force him to come to the Fourth of July party. Before it looked like he wanted Ronan just to have a fun but after the Camaro something broke in him. But once again, it only my interpretation, because K is the only TRC antagonist that doesn’t get PoV, so I can wonder, what was going on in his head.
I’m tired of this, because most of the things could be explained, if we got his PoV, because without it his actions seems random.
After the text “bring something fun to fourth of july or we’ll see which pill works the best on your brother“, Ronan called K demanding where is Matthew and K responded:
“Ronan demanded, “Where is he?” “You know, I asked nice the first few times. Are you coming to Fourth? Are you coming? Are you coming? Here, have a motherfucking car. Are you coming? You made it ugly. Bring something impressive tonight.”“
It doesn’t sounds that evil to me more like desperate (repetition of “are you coming”) and hurting (”you made it ugly”). It made me feel more curious about what was going in his head and what lead him to kidnapping more than being angry at him for kidnapping Matthew.
Kavinsky was looking someone like Ronan, to share problems and to destroy themselves together. And Ronan was the closest thing to it, dreamer and all. He was looking for connection but in the end, Ronan didn’t want anything to do with him and that ended in tragedy.
6. Fourth of July
Ah yes, the main reason why I’m writing this post. We know how this goes. Gangsey arrives at party. Ronan demands where is his brother. Ronan follow K into a dream.
"Kavinsky laughed the word. "Reality! Reality’s what other people dream for you.”
“Reality’s where other people are,” Ronan replied. He stretched out his arms. “What’s here, K? Nothing! No one!”
“Just us.”
There was a heavy understanding in that statement, amplified by the dream. I know what you are, Kavinsky had said. “That’s not enough,” Ronan replied.“
One again K got rejected and it was told to him he "wasn’t enough” Okay, Ronan doesn’t own him anything but what happened next is more fucked up
Kavinsky dreams fire dragon, Ronan night horror. They fight. Gangsey search for Matthew.
Ronan demands K to tell him where is Matthew and K just said “He’s all yours! You missed my point, man. All I wanted was this —”“ while gesturing at their creations and ONCE AGAIN I REPEAT ONCE AGAIN we are not sure what K meant: dreaming together? fighting? One chapter from his PoV couldn’t hurt Maggie you know?
Matthew got rescued, Ronan shielded him from upcoming dragon then this:
“He shouted to Kavinsky, ”Get down!”
But Kavinsky didn’t look away from the creatures. He said,”The world’s a nightmare”.
Ronan once again shouted to him but Kavinsky didn’t answered and let the dragon to kill him.
“A second later, the fire dragon exploded into Kavinsky. It went straight through him, around him, flame around an object. Kavinsky fell. Not as if he was struck, though. Just like when he’d taken the green pill. He crumpled to his knees and then slumped gracelessly off the car.“
And we know K is dead, because both the dragon and Prokopenko fall asleep.
And that’s all and what was all for? Because they thought he was draining the ley lines (but Adam fixing the lines seems to do the trick) and because Ronan didn’t want to come to Fourth of July. After that comes nothing. No reaction from the cast and the dream pack who supposedly were his friends (In later book Jiang talks to Ronan like nothing happened) there is no funeral of which we know and the town is silent. Like K never existed.
What kind of message this sends to a reader? That if you are like Kavinsky in any way nobody will mind if you are gone. You are not even worthless to remember. On one podcast M*ggie said she don’t want to be educational in her books and that’s f*cked up because she is writing YA, young people who are easily influenced and after reading how K is treated the majority will close the book with belief that people like K don’t deserve help and they are goners not worthy of redemption.
While in the same book Gray Man, adult hitman who killed people on pages, was hunting down Ronan, relieved to be murderer behind a Niall’s death, beat up and threaten Declan with a gun to tell him where the Greywaren was not only forgiven by everyone (including Ronan) but got redemption arc and love interest. Let me repeat adult man, literal a hitman gets redemption arc but not mentally ill kid. Okay Margaret what the f*ck was that. Where is the logic, where is the lamb sauce?! Does she knows how her writing can influence young people? And it seems most of the fans agree with her.  
Conclusion
Joseph Kavinsky was handled terribly through the whole book. With main cast hating him from the get-go. Narration that tried to make him the great evil (with some fans of TRC calling him the worst villain) and after the book got published the fans and the author themself further demonised him, 17 year old boy with a drug addiction, mental illness and with possible history of abuse.
I can only shake my head every time, I see someone calling him the devil. What Kavisnky needed was rehab and therapy, not death! If she wanted to find solution to stop him from dreaming, why couldn’t she just moved him outside of Henrietta or Virginia, not lead him to commit s*icide and public s*icide mind you. He was a bad person but nobody deserved to die like this.
To end this post (I wrote this post so long that in my country is no longer Fourth of July), I still to this day think about Kavinsky and what would happened, if the author didn’t choose the easy way to "get rid of him”. And do not tell me, it was impossible to end it differently, because it was possible. Ronan just grabbing him by the shirt and pulling him off the car. Sending him to a rehab or just talking with him, instead of assuming from the start, that he wouldn’t listen. His only crimes were, he needed help and he wouldn’t listen to Gangsey telling him what to do.
131 notes · View notes
alitanyofcosmic · 5 years ago
Text
Anyways m*ggie stiefvater, a cishet american woman, had no business writing about a 17 y/o mentally ill, drug addicted, mlm, eastern european abuse victim and had especially no business writing this character with destructive internalised homophobia, which eventually drove him to committing suicide. And I’m very sad but not surprised that no one seems to care enough to criticise her on this.
115 notes · View notes
alitanyofcosmic · 5 years ago
Text
can u believe steifvater thought it was a good idea for her one poc character to make offensive jokes abt being korean and also for her token gay couple to make racist inside jokes abt him no offense but henry cheng deserved better and his whole internalised racism written by a white woman was unnecessary
186 notes · View notes
alitanyofcosmic · 5 years ago
Text
actually wait. i’m tired of white trc fans trying to excuse the racism in the books. no adam and ronan weren’t making fun of henry’s canadian accent. 😐😐😐
199 notes · View notes
alitanyofcosmic · 5 years ago
Photo
Tumblr media
I’m not even sorry
508 notes · View notes