all-stairs

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My cats wanted to fight again and I wasn't letting them but the passion in their eye contact suggests they started fighting telepathically

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I cannot stop thinking about this article. It has enchanted me.

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met a woman today whose original real actual given-at-birth first name is "Vendetta." ma'am are you aware you are a videogame protagonist and/or a character in a skullduggery pleasant novel. real quick sorry to bother you miss but who exactly were your parents expecting you to avenge in their name

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getting a note on a super old post

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tomorrow im really gonna give it my nothing

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Being the only bi cis guy amongst almost exclusively trans friends and peers is wild because in theory its like im living in a horny manga where all of a dudes friends turn into hot babes, but in reality they are hunting me like the last bison on the prairie. 5 years ago I mentioned bionicle and one of them asked when I was starting estrogen.

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(gripping the skink with both hands, pale and feverish, sweating and shaking as I look at myself in the mirror) “killing a character is a valid writing choice that can be a crucial plot mechanic and lend beauty and depth to the story as a whole” (wretches up blood into the sink) “even when it’s my favorite character”

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Zohran Mamdani has almost certainly won New York City's mayoral primary. Next week's Ranked Vote tabulation will make the results clear, but Lander's and Adrienne's votes will overwhelmingly go to Mamdani, who will face Sliwa and incumbent Eric Adams in the general election. It's unclear if Cuomo will also mount an independent run.

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guy who does unboxing videos but he only talks about the boxes

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it's funny because my job involves a lot of using a box cutter, so you'd think that's the thing I'd accidentally hurt myself with the most

but nooo no no no. the box cutter is my colleague, my ally, my friend. you know what is truly bloodthirsty in a print & signage shop? literally Anything Else that's able to cut but not supposed to. cardboard, sheets of plastic, the humble paper of course, corrugated polypropylene, aluminum composite sheets - i nicked myself on a sheet of magnetic material today?? it bled. kinda profusely.

basically:

box cutter: a trusty companion, might hurt you if you handle it wrong, but that's understandable

stuff you use the box cutter on: they know you as their enemy. they know the rules of this life: kill, or be killed. they know what they have to do.

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When I was little I was fully 100% certain that vampires would have hollow fangs. I never explained this to anyone but I knew in my child heart that when vampires bit people they used their hollow fangs to suck blood like two tiny straws.

This seemed very sensible and left less mess than just biting someone with sharp teeth, obviously.

I think it was because I was an Animal Facts kind of kid and I knew venomous snakes could have hollow fangs so I just superimposed that idea onto vampires.

The funniest part of this is that it never came up in conversation, people would reference them drinking blood and I’d be like yeah of course, and in my head I’d be thinking: with their little sippy teeth, they drink blood, we’re on the same page.

It wasn’t until sometime in high school that the topic was broached in a way that made me question this. When I voiced my conviction about hollow teeth I was laughed at. Once I was questioning whether it was a silly thing to think I was forced to imagine how hard it would be to suck blood through two tubes tiny enough to be in teeth moreover how would you make inner fang suction and realized I’d had the weirdest headcanon about vampires for most of my life.

Editing to add that after a day full of vampire silliness I’m actually delighted to know I wasn’t the only person to think this.

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tumblr are you telling me something

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they should invent joints that don’t hurt

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Imagine if getting core mental trauma was somehow audible or visible. Like you're already having a bad day and you're trying to wrangle two toddlers and a bag of groceries and work was ass and then you hear the sound of something shattering and you just know that one of your kids' emotional core and sense of basic safety just fucking broke and you can't even tell which one it was.

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Reblog to give a trans person a fresh and perfectly ripe mango wait huh

It's the wikipedia image??? How big could it be

What

Huh???

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what the fuck