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[allan-v-maro-blog]

Scared Straight Inc.

Remember when you were a child, and you were afraid of the monster under your bed, or in your closet? Maybe it was neither, but instead your parents told you if you didn't go to sleep or misbehaved that some kind of horrifying creature would come for you. These monsters are commonly referred to as Boogeymen, and for thousands of years, parents have been using them to frighten kids into good behavior. Every culture throughout history has had their own variation of the Boogeyman, and this got me thinking, what if not only did these creatures exist, but there was a sort of company where it's their job to scare children? How else do you explain the different boogeymen from all over the world? Anyway, here's another story where the scenario I just mentioned is not only real, but a lucrative business.

Scared Straight Inc.

Does your child repeatedly disobey you on a daily basis? Do they throw a tantrum whenever they don't get their way? Or, are they just plain disrespectful to their parents? If you answered “yes” to any of these questions, then perhaps this may interest you: There is a way to end it.

We at Scared Straight Incorporated specialize in helping parents cure their children of what we refer to as “problematic behavior”. Let's be honest, the sooner children learn to talk, the sooner they start to talk back to their parents, and that's not even the worst of it. Before you know it, they'll be screaming at the top of their lungs because you won't buy them a candy bar, or spending the whole night keeping you awake because you grounded them for whatever reason.

But, it doesn't have to be this way. We can stop the tantrums, the hissy fits, the bad behavior. How, you ask? Very simple. We believe in the time honored method of “Scare them straight”. This is where our company gets its name, we will appear to your child in the dark of night typically from under their bed or in their closet, in any form you specify, the scarier the better, and terrify the bejesus out of the little monster, by showing them what a real monster looks like.

Simply warn your child that, for example, if they don't behave and listen to what you say, Carl The Crazy Clown will get them. Depending on their age, you may not even need our services, and this will be enough to get them to stop. But most likely they will laugh off your threat, until that night when one of our representatives bursts out of their closet in the form of a clown waving a chainsaw through the air.

You may be thinking this sounds rather harsh, but remember, it's for their own good, as well as your peace and quiet. Now, we're not in the business of traumatizing children, that's their school’s job. We never scare them too much, just enough to set them on the right path of obedience and good behavior.

If this all sound bizarre or you think this is all a joke, we assure you, it is not. For countless generations, civilizations all around the world have terrified their children into behaving by frightening them with tales of monsters that will come for them in the night. As the centuries passed, parents had to get more creative with their threats, for example, in Ancient Rome, during Hannibal’s crusade against the Roman Republic, mothers would tell their children that Hannibal himself would come and take them away if they misbehaved.

Nowadays, we boogeymen are typically thought to be nothing more than a fairy tale, but rest assured we are out there, unseen unless we wish to be seen. Little known fact, we don't have a single standard form, we are shapeshifters that take whatever appearance we please. We're not all male either, there are also females among us, the term “Boogeyman” is just generally more accepted.

If you're still not convinced, just check out some of the reviews from our clients…

My four year old was constantly causing chaos throughout our house. Breaking things, drawing on the walls, flooding the bathroom, you name it. A friend told me about Scared Straight Inc. and at first I thought it was a joke. But me and my husband were desperate, we tried time outs, taking away toys, spanking and various other punishments, but nothing worked. Then we told our kid if they misbehaved one more time, The Scare Bear, a great black bear with glowing red eyes and a taste for naughty children would get him. He of course didn't believe us, until around eleven that night, when we heard him scream for us to save him. Now, he doesn't dare disobey us or pull any of his old tricks. Thank you, Scared Straight Inc! - Mary S.

Me and my wife love our twin daughters more than anything, but at times they can be absolutely unbearable. The screaming, the crying when they don't get whatever they want, but worst of all is their constant bickering. They'll argue over anything, from who is prettier, to which one of them we love more. We finally had enough and called Scared Straight Inc, and warned them that if they kept behaving this way, The Splitter Sisters would get them, and take them both far away from each other and us, to a dark and terrible forest to wander the woods for the rest of their lives. That night, we heard them both cry “Mommy! Daddy!” and when we came running to their room, the both of them ran over to us, hugging us as if their lives depended on it and saying how sorry they were for their bad behavior. To this day, they are the best of friends, and we owe it to Scared Straight Inc. - Marcus H.

I am a single mother with a six year old son. He means the world to me, but he has got to be the hungriest child on the planet. When he was a baby, it took at least half a dozen jars of baby food each meal before he was satisfied, and he would constantly stuff his face with whatever he could get that's edible! I worry deeply about his future health, and tried many times to get him to not eat so much, but he would keep sneaking food behind my back. Finally, I reached the end of my rope and called Scared Straight Inc. I told him if he kept eating like a pig, that a witch would fly in through his window at night and turn him into one. He didn't believe me, but later that night, he screamed for me to come quickly to his room. Let's just say that after that incident, he's eating more fruits and playing outside much more often, and I can't thank Scared Straight Inc. enough for it. - Susan B.

So if you've got a problem child , in the range of two to nine years of age, call 1-800-SCARED to set up an appointment. We'll fix those little terrors good, guaranteed!

[allan-v-maro-blog]

The Devil Went Down to D.C.

They say the devil is in the details, and that the road to hell is paved with good intentions. Two lessons that the main character of our next story is about to learn the hard way. He wants what’s best for his country, but also thinks he should be the one to decide what’s best for it. Which reminds me of another old saying, that hubris goeth before a fall.

The Devil Went Down to D.C.

Hero. Tyrant. Genius. Madman. President Thomas Walters has been called all of these things and more at one point or another in his career. Not that it really matters now, as he stares out of the Oval Office window at the utter chaos that is sweeping the streets of the capital. Gunshots, explosions and shouts of fury and pain fill the air, sending a chill of fear down the president’s spine. He knows what’s going on. He knows they are coming for him.

But at this point, he has nothing really left to lose. He’s lost his supporters, his loved ones, even his soul. Not necessarily in that order. No, it was his soul that he lost first, the day he met her, the day he signed that contract.

Five years ago, he was just a low level politician who had never held an office of any real importance in his life. Hell, he wasn’t even that, he was merely an assistant to a politician, and the only reason he even had that job was because his rich father had bribed a bunch of officials to get it for him.

Since middle school, he dreamed of becoming a senator like his father, but then he thought, why stop there? Why not go all the way to President of the United States? For years he aspired to be something greater than his father ever was, but he was never able to ascend above his present position. That is, until he met her.

One day he was in his office, which was so small it was really a broom closet more than anything, when there was a knock on his door. Before he could even say “Come in.” The door opened and there stood a woman with long dark hair that cascaded down to her waist, dressed in a business suit and skirt and carrying a briefcase. “Who are you?” Thomas asked, and the woman smiled “I think the better question would be what is it I can offer you, Mr. Walters.”

Without even being invited, she strode into the office as if she were expected, and sat down in front of Thomas’ desk. “Look, who do you think you are?” Said Thomas, beginning to get more than a little ticked “You can’t just waltz on into my office and expect me to­…” “Oh, spare me your delusions of being some all important politician, Mr. Walters.” Said the woman. “You and I both know you’re nothing more than a glorified desk jockey, but you could be so much more. You want to be like dear old daddy, no, bigger and better than daddy ever was! Well, I can make it happen, Mr. Walters.”

Thomas crossed his arms and scowled. “Really? And just how would you do that? Or better yet, why? I don’t even know your name!” The woman smiled again, which for some reason gave Thomas a feint feeling of uneasiness. “If you really must know, my name is Barbara. As to why I would help you, lets just say I have my reasons. Don’t believe me? Then let me give you a small taste of how I can help you achieve your ultimate goal.”

Barbara then stood from her seat and began to leave. “Wait!” Thomas called “Where are you going? I thought you were going to help me?” “I am.” Said Barbara “By this time tomorrow, you will have already risen above your current station. I’ll see you later, Mr. Walters.” For several moments, Thomas just sat there and stared at the door through which the mysterious woman had exited his office, feeling confused more than anything else. Was this Barbara woman really capable of helping him realize his dream? And if she was, what was it she wanted in return?

He put the thought out of his head and returned to his work, sure that this must all be some sort of joke orchestrated by one or more of his higher ups, those bunch of stuck up, pig headed big wigs. But as Thomas lay in bed that night, he was awoken around four in the morning by the ringing of the telephone on his nightstand. He answered it in an irritated tone, unable to believe that anybody would be making phone calls at this time.

But shortly after answering the call, he dropped the phone onto the floor, unable to comprehend at first what the person on the other end of the line told him. His boss, Senator Gibson, had just died of a heart attack, and his position was now open. The phone call was to ask Thomas if, as Mr Gibson's assistant, he would like to run in the election to replace him.

After recovering from his initial shock, Thomas quickly picked up the phone from his bedroom floor and replied " Yes! I will run to replace Senator Gibson. Thank you." Hanging up the phone, he lay back in his bed and stared at the ceiling, a million thoughts racing through his mind at once. This was it! Finally he would have his chance to take the first step to achieving his life's ambition. Despite working for the man, Thomas couldn't say he knew Senator Gibson very well, so he didn't really feel sad that he was dead. All he had to do now was win the election.

Later, as Thomas entered his office, he found Barbara sitting in front of his desk, waiting for him. "How did you get in here?" He said, knowing full well he always locked his office door when he left every night. Barbara shrugged. "That's not important. What is important, is that I've proven that I can help you achieve your dream, and am still waiting for an answer on whether or not you accept my offer."

"What are you talking about?" Said Thomas "You haven't proven anything. All you did was walk into my office, say you could help me, then leave. How have you helped me?"

Barbara smiled, a sort of half gleeful, half wicked grin. "I helped you by disposing of your predecessor, Senator Gibson." Thomas could only blink and stare dumbfounded at Barbara upon hearing this news. "That's impossible! Gibson died of a heart attack!" Barbara chuckled. "Yes, well, I had to make his death believable. I could have had him die in an accident or murder, but then you would probably be one of the most likely suspects. No, it was much better to have him die of a heart condition, no suspicion, no evidence, just an open position on the Senate. Now all you need to do is replace him, and I can guarantee you that and more, if you just sign this."

Barbara open the briefcase at her side and pulled out a contract written in red ink on paper that looked to be ancient, with torn edges and yellowish brown stains. Thomas couldn't believe what he was hearing. This woman just appears out of nowhere, offers to fulfill his greatest desires, and says she killed his boss by somehow causing his heart to fail.

He just stared at her for several moments of silence before finally saying "Just who are you, really? How can you do what you're offering to do for me?" Barbara smiled that same, unnerving smile from before and said "Alright, you got me. Barbara is not my true name, it's more of an alias. In fact, I have many names. Lucifer, Satan, Beelzebub, Mephistopheles, take your pick." Thomas' eyes practically popped out of his head when she told him this "So you're really..." He started to say, before she cut him off. "The Devil, yes. I know, I know, hard to believe, but is it really? I've been in politics since the days of the Roman Empire. Perhaps you've heard of some of my clients? Cleopatra, Caligula, Nero, Vlad Tepes, just to name a few. Now, shall we get down to business?"

"Lets say that I do accept your offer, what do you want in return?" Said Thomas, quite sure he already knew the answer. "It's all detailed right here, in this contract." Thomas took the contract and tried to read it, but it was in some language he had never seen before. "Basically it states that I shall guarantee your victory in the election for Senator, then afterwards a presidential election, and it return, I get exclusive rights to your soul upon your death."

"So I'll win the election for the senate, and become president? You can do that?"

"Of course. How do you think Obama got elected twice?"

Thomas mentally weighed the choice presented to him. Here he was with the opportunity to be granted his greatest desire, but on the other hand, he would literally be selling his soul. Then he remembered why he wanted to be a politician in the first place, to actually do some good for his country. Unlike the majority of the fat cats in Washington, he would actually care about the people he governed. The time had come to put an end to the petty squabbles of the left and right. He would form his own party, a party for the people, a party for true patriots.

Even if it cost him his very soul to make it a reality, he was just one man, who was doing it for the good of an entire nation. In the end, he thought, it would be worth it. Taking out a pen form his pocket protector, he signed the contract, and handed it to Barbara, who put on a pair of spectacles and quickly looked it over. "Okay, everything looks to be in order, Mr. Walters. I'd wish you good luck in your future endeavors, but that would be redundant, now wouldn't it?" Chuckling to herself, Barbara placed the contract in her briefcase, closed it, and bid Thomas farewell before exiting the office.

Countless emotions swept over Thomas at once. Excitement, euphoria, and a tinge of fear to name a few. Here he was, guaranteed to win two major elections that would change his life and the course of American history, no matter what he did. Most in his position would probably abuse this situation, but he had more dignity than that. He may not have had very much to begin with, but he still had some. No, he would stay on the straight and narrow, and set an example for future leaders to hopefully follow in his footsteps.

Still, there was a small, nagging thought in the back of his mind. A little voice that chastised him for selling his immortal soul in exchange for advancing his position in life. He silenced the voice by mentally responding that the country had been going down the toilet for years because of the constant strife from the Republicans and Democrats endless bickering and corruption. If he had to literally sell his soul to make things right, then so be it. Even if it meant going to Hell in the end, he would go there proudly and nobly, knowing that he did what was right for the country and its people.

Over the next couple months, Thomas attended rallies and gave public speeches all across the state, getting people on his side for his election. He knew it was pointless, that he was going to win regardless, but even so, he wanted the people behind him for the future, when he was commander in chief. After all, a leader is only as good as the people who support him.

When the time came for the votes to be counted, it of course was no surprise to Thomas that he had beaten his opponent in a landslide. The next day, as he admired the view of the capital from the window of his new, much larger office,a voice from behind him said “So, enjoying your new job?” He didn't even bother to turn around, because he knew who it was.

“As a matter of fact, I am enjoying it very much.” Thomas said “But there's one little thing bothering me. Just how is it exactly, that you're able to ensure I win these elections? How can you control the outcome?” Barbara smiled “As I said before, I've been in politics for a very long time, so let's just say I have a lot of connections. I can't tell you the exact details, that's a trade secret, but I assure you, it's nothing you need to concern yourself with.”

Thomas turned to face Barbara “Can you at least tell me one thing? Why are you really helping me? What would you have to gain from me becoming president? Don't tell me you have your reasons, either. I want an actual answer.” Barbara shrugged “I suppose you could say that I see something in you. You could call it potential, if you like, enough to change the world, in fact.” Thomas wasn't sure whether to be flattered or afraid that the devil thought he could change the world. But he figured that what he had planned would bring about a glorious new age for the country, so it must be a good thing. For a brief instant he wondered why the devil would want such a wonderful thing to happen, but he pushed the thought from his mind, and asked “So, you're still going to keep to the second part of our deal, right?”

Barbara smiled again and nodded “Of course, Mr Walters. I always give my clients exactly what they signed for. Speaking of which, I have others I should check on, so I'll be seeing you again soon.” Barbara turned and left the office, while Thomas sat in his chair and thought what his next step should be in reforming the country.

He thought back to when he signed that deal with Barbara. How he thought he would form his own party for true patriots, one that the people could count on, rather than be exploited by it. Yes, that would be what he would do next. Thomas would spend the next three years leading up to his inevitable election building his own political party, which he fittingly named the Patriot Party. Much to his surprise, he actually gained support and followers to his cause much quicker than than he thought.

He didn't know for sure whether or not that was due to the deal with Barbara, or because most of the citizens were genuinely fed up with the system of bureaucracy and corruption in Washington. Probably a bit of both, he thought to himself. When the time had come to elect the next president, Thomas announced he would run for office as a third party candidate. The two main parties laughed at him and thought he had lost it, since third parties had never won the presidential race in the history of the United States. But even so, Thomas persisted. He ignored their mockery and jeering, because no matter what promises they made to the people, whether they intended to keep them or not, he knew that he would emerge the victor in the end.

Sure enough, come Election Day, President Thomas Walters found himself celebrating with his supporters as it was announced that he had won the race for president by a landslide. He soon took the oath of office and was sitting in the Oval Office, having achieved his dream at last. But he knew his work was far from over, that this was only the beginning.

A few days after taking office, as he was looking over a bill from congress, a voice from nowhere said “So are you satisfied, Mr. President?” He looked up, knowing who it was, and lo and behold there stood Barbara. “To answer your question, yes, as a matter of fact I am.” He said, to which Barbara smiled “Then I guess I won't be needing to stop in on you anymore. No more unexpected visits from me, seeing how our bargain has been fulfilled.”

“Wait!” Said Thomas “Before you go, I don't have to worry about being assassinated or anything like that in office, right? That's not why you helped me is it? So you can collect my soul shortly after our contract is met?”

Barbara chuckled “Mr. Walters, give a little more credit than that. It wouldn't be fair for me to collect on our agreement just as you achieve your lifelong goal. I may be the devil, but there are rules that even I must obey. No, you will not die while in office. I will come for you in due time, until then, have fun running the country.”

For the next year or so, things went rather smoothly, not just for President Thomas Walters, but America as a whole. Unemployment was at an all time low, the economy was booming, and even the illegal immigration issue had been solved by Mexico being annexed into the United States. Of course not everything was all milk and honey.

For one thing, there was still issues in the Middle East, plus in the process of his rise to power, Thomas had all but abolished both major parties in Washington, which of course made him more than a few enemies. On top of all that, shortly after annexing Mexico, a group of Mexican nationalists, calling themselves the “Mexican Freedom Federation” began attacks on government facilities in an attempt to “Liberate Mother Mexico”.

This in turn lead to a good chunk of the American people, many of whom were former democrats and liberals, to sympathize and even join the MFF, mostly out of hatred for Thomas Walters and how he'd robbed them of their power. In the second year of his first term, rumors of an alliance between the MFF and ISIS began to circulate, and President Walters, deciding it was better to be safe than sorry, initiated the Homeland Security Detainment Act, which required all citizens of Islamic or Mexican descent to be relocated to internment camps in western and central states of the country.

Needless to say, the bill was rather controversial, despite reports that those who were being detained were actually treated well and properly cared for. This in turn caused some members of the Patriot party to resign in protest, while others left the country all together. But that wasn't even the worst of it.

The true disaster came when members of the the former Democrat and Republican parties made an attempt on the president’s life. They had bribed the White House head chef to poison the president’s dinner. But the chef was no expert assassin, and hadn't used enough to actually kill the president, but it did make him extremely sick.

Upon inspection and questioning the chef, who admitted he had been paid to commit such a traitorous act, this was the final straw. Nobody was really exactly sure why the events that followed happened in the first place. Some said that President Walters had gone mad with power after his failed assassination, while other said he was just plain mad, that his resulting sickness had done something to his brain.

Nevertheless, it marked the beginning of the end, not just for the presidency of Thomas Walters, but for civilization in general. After having the people responsible for his attempted poisoning executed for treason, Thomas had become rather paranoid of the people around him. All he wanted was to serve his country, and this was the thanks he got? It was clear to him now that he couldn't trust anybody, especially those closest to him.

He became distant and uncaring to his former friends and family members. His wife in particular, who after getting into an argument with him and saying “Your father would be ashamed of what you've become!” was told to get out and never come back. Shortly after this, there had been more reports of attacks by Islamic extremists and the MFF. Thomas decided that it was time to put an end to this problem once and for all. He had recently been informed by his secret service that the CIA had been developing a special kind of bioengineered virus that would only effect a selective group of hosts, depending on their ethnicity. It had been created as a last resort during the Iraq War, and in his mind right now, the situation called for a last resort solution.

The virus was first released into the water supply of the internment camps holding the suspected ISIS and MFF supporters. For the first few days, nobody showed any symptoms. Then one day, everyone being held in the camp was found dead in their cots. The virus, which had been dubbed Silent Death, attacked the brain, specifically the parts that controlled the hearts and lungs while the host sleeps, shutting them down and killing the infected person.

The test having been successful, Walters ordered Silent Death to be released all across the America and the Middle East. Since it would only effect those of Hispanic or Islamic ethnicity, everyone else would be fine, and both IS.is and the MFF would no longer be a problem.

But there was one thing, one fatal mistake Thomas Walters did not count on. Silent Death, or as it would go o. To be known as, Walters Syndrome, began to spread to water supplies across the globe, as well as mutate to not only effect certain humans, but all humans in general. With Silent Death spreading rampant over the Earth, and wars erupting over control of clean water sources, it was only natural that sooner or later somebody would let the cat out of the bag, and reveal it was President Walters who had ordered it in the first place.

So now the President finds himself standing in front of the Oval Office window, watching the chaos in the streets of the capital as what supporters he has left battle the hordes of angry surviving citizens hungry for his blood. He knows they are coming, he knows what's going to happen to him. They want him dead, but how will they do it?

Will they hang him from a tree on the White House lawn? Or will they put together a firing squad and shoot him like a dog? Perhaps they will simply tear him limb from limb with their own hands like a pack of wild animals. As he contemplates his eventual fate, a familiar voice speaks from behind him. “So at last it all comes full circle.” He immediate turns to face her, a look of sheer rage on his face. “You!” He snarls “You tricked me! You told me I wouldn't have to worry about being assassinated!” Barbara grinned that same, wicked grin from all those years ago “I told you the truth, Mr President. I said you would not die while in office, and you didn't. Although, seeing as your country and soon the rest of the world has been reduced to anarchy, I'd say that part of our contract is now void.”

“But you said I would change the world!” Thomas said, and Barbara grinned even wider. “And you did exactly that, Mr Walters. I just never said it would be for the better, did I? You wanted to become leader of the free world, and that's exactly what you got. Bet you didn't think you'd have a hand in bringing about the end of the world too, eh?”

With a cry of fury, Thomas rushed at Barbara in an attempt to strangle her, but before he could get a grasp on her throat, she vanished into thin air, and his fingers closed on nothing, as though he had been trying to grab smoke. Then came the sound dozens of fists pounding on the Oval Office door. The lynch mob had gotten inside the White House, and they were just outside, eager to get at him. Just before they broke inside, Thomas Walters heard the voice of Barbara seemingly from nowhere one last time. “Be seeing you soon, Mr. President.”

[allan-v-maro-blog]

Ode to Gaming

(This is my first attempt ever at writing a poem, so I apologize in advance if the rhyming isn't very good.)

When I was just a boy of of five, my father did present a gift to me. It was square and grey, and I would dare say, a wonder of technology. It had but two buttons, one oval, one round. One would reset the screen, the other turned it on or shut it down.

You probably know what I mean, if this device you already did see. For yes, I must confess, it was an NES, of the Super variety. For hours I would play it, as though I were the toast of the town. Though its games I could never beat, I couldn't put the controller down.

From there my passion grew, as game tech did evolve. From Nintendo to Sega, Playstation to XBOX, I had played them all. I could not attempt to list how many games I've loved since then. Too many to count, I should say. Will I ever stop? I don't know if or when.

From the Mushroom Kingdom to Green Hill Zone, and everything in between. I've seen them all, and without stall, I say I'm a gaming machine! On PS2, I must tell you, I have fond memories. Like God of War, and so many more, I'm sure will be loved for centuries.

Then there was the Gameboy, both Colored and Advance. Both I received after Christmas Eve, and it was with joy I danced. Years later more, I bought my own PS4, after much work and trade. Looking back now on my collection, I'd say I've got it made.

I could go on forever, about my obsession thus. But if I do, I fear that you, will think me drab and dull. So now I part, but please, permit these last words my friend. Young or old, silver or gold, I'm a gamer to the end!

[allan-v-maro-blog]

Gods Beyond the Wall

Do you believe in life from other worlds? Not just bacteria or fauna, but sentient life with advanced technology? Do you believe in gods? All powerful deities with unimaginable powers and abilities? If you believe in either of these things, then this story should interest you, because it combines these two concepts into one race. So sit back and enjoy as I present a tale of, quite literally, universal proportions that I call...

Gods Beyond the Wall

Excerpt from the Book of Deus:

For untold millenia, the Earth was ravaged by humanity, who spread evil, war and corruption all across the world. Whether it be for wealth, belief or malice, the nations of the world endlessly battled each other and spilled their own blood. Until the coming of Zejovah. He appeared from the paradise of Olympius, and with a display of his mighty strength and awesome power, purged the Earth of it’s corrupt and greedy rulers.

He explained to the remaining humans that his race, the Deus, came from a world separated from our own by an invisible wall called the Universal Barrier. Olympius, as this world is known, is the ultimate utopia, where there is no war or disease or famine. The Deus had been watching the Earth for eons, and knew if they did not intervene, the world, along with humanity, was doomed.

Thus, Zejovah had been sent as humanity and the Earth’s savior. The Deus saw that spread among the population of the world were humans who were pure and honest, but they were few and far between. Zejovah declared that humanity should be given a chance to prove itself to be worthy of joining the Deus on Olympius, and thus the Earth become one. The ceaselessly warring nations and all forms of wealth were abolished, all diseases and maladies cured, and all hunger ended. With these gifts, Zejovah and his wife Diva established themselves as the governors of Earth, and the arbiters of humanity. When a human proves themselves worthy, they are allowed to join the Deus in the paradise of Olympius.

March 15, 12,872 A.D.

This is it! I can’t believe it! I finally did it! Lord Zejovah has declared me worthy of Olympius! From the time I was born, my parents told me stories of our lords Zejovah and Diva, and their incredible power. How they cleansed the world of corruption and bloodshed over ten thousand years ago, how the world used to be plagued by countless diseases and people who never had enough to eat or drink, and were always suffering. Until they appeared, and purged the world of these evils and more.

Now they wait for me at the Sky Palace. A great feast is to be held in my honor for me and my family, before I bid them farewell and finally join our Lord’s kin in Olympius. My Mother, Father and sister were overcome with joy and pride when they received the news, that I would be the first of us to ascend to paradise. My mother hugged me so tight I thought she might break me in half, and my Father, he could not stop saying how proud he was. As for my younger sister, she hugged me as well, though I’m quite sure I could see just a hint of envy in her eyes.

We leave our home and depart for the Sky Palace. I can’t even remember how many times I would gaze up at the gold and ivory towers of the palace from my bedroom window and imagine myself rising above the clouds to the home of our Lords, to tread the very halls of salvation and at last pass through the Ivory Arch to Olympius.

When we arrived at the palace grounds, Lord Zejovah and Lady Diva were there in the flesh, waiting for us. They both towered over us at ten feet tall, their golden skin and silver, almost metallic hair practically gleaming in the sunlight, their pure white clothing fluttering in the gentle breeze. We all approach them and get on our knees and bow low. “Arise.” Said Lord Zejovah, and we all immediately got back on our feet.

Lord Zejovah looked down upon us, at me in particular, and smiled, his perfect, shining white teeth nearly blinding me with their gleam. “Young man.” He said “You are officially the youngest human to ever receive the honor of being allowed to ascend to Olympius. Most of your kind spend their entire lives struggling to prove themselves worthy, while you have done it in not even a quarter of the time. You will make a fine addition to Deus society, I’m sure.” He turned to his wife, Lady Diva.

“Anything to say to the boy, Dear?”

She smiled, her teeth even more brilliant than her husband’s, and said “You are truly a credit to your family, and your kind. Living proof that there is hope for any human to achieve purity.” I bow again. “I am honored by your words and your judgment, my Lord and Lady.” Lord Zejovah spread his arms wide in welcome, and said “Come now, your grand feast awaits!”

We follow them to the enormous golden twin doors of the palace entrance. Lord Zejovah effortlessly pushes both doors open, and ushers us into a grand hall, with carvings depicting the various stories of our Lord and Lady and their great deeds lining the walls. We are lead to an equally grand dining hall, with a long, polished wooden table with golden trays and utensils lining it, as well as piles upon piles of various foods. We all sit at the table, marveling at the sight. Never in our lives have we ever seen so much food for a single meal! After our hosts take their seats at the head of the table, we begin to eat.

I don’t know what it is, but something about this food makes it taste even better than if we were eating at home! When we finish, Lord Zejovah stands and says “Now my boy, it is time. I suggest you bid your family goodbye, but don’t worry, I’m sure they’ll be joining you soon enough.” I give my Mother one last kiss, and my Father and sister one last hug, and I say goodbye to each of them before we are lead to the one room in the palace that everyone on Earth dreams of entering; the room of the Ivory Arch.

As the name implies, it is a room with only a large arch in the center. Lord Zejovah and Lady Diva each go to opposite sides of the arch and place their hands on it. Instantly, the center space of the arch illuminates with a bright yellow light. The portal through the Universal Barrier, the gate to Olympius. I turn around and give my family one last smile and a wave goodbye, before I step through the portal and immediately feel a very warm sensation spread throughout my body, and a blinding flash of yellow light forces me to close my eyes.

When I open them again, I am standing in the center of a beautiful city of ivory and gold, surrounded by other gold skinned, silver haired beings. The Deus. One of them approaches me with a large silver circlet in one hand. Before I can greet him, the circlet, as though with a mind of it’s own, flies from his hand and clamps itself around my neck. An electric shock surges through my body, causing me to drop to my knees, trying to pry the ring off, to no avail. Suddenly, I’m having a hard time remembering where I came from or who I am, I can feel my memories fading to nothing. The last thing I hear before I completely forget is one of the Deus talking about me, saying “Just one this time? Well, once the collar takes full effect, he should make a perfect slave, just like the rest.”

[allan-v-maro-blog]

Perdition University

When I was in high school, I was often bullied by several other students, probably because I wasn’t a very social kind of guy. I’m sure you all know what I’m talking about. Every school has them. The jocks who relentlessly torment anybody smaller than them, the pompous cheerleader who thinks she’s god’s gift to the world and all the boys should be kissing the ground she walks on, sometimes even the teachers are just as bad, if not worse. The main character in this story is a composition of all the jerks and A-­holes that I had the misfortune to know during those hard years. I’ve always believed that there’s a special place in hell for people like them, and that’s precisely where our story takes place. So sit back, relax and enjoy as I present a little story that I like to call...

Perdition University

I was never really raised to believe in Heaven or Hell, so I never thought about it until I ended up in the latter. How did I get here? I guess you could say it started on my first day of high school. I was sort of a shrimpy kid, and kind of awkward, which of course meant I pretty much had a giant target on my back to be constantly bullied and harassed.

Worst of all were the seniors. You know, the older kids who think that because it’s their last year of school, that gave them a free pass to be total douchebags to everybody. The ironic things is, that while I was basically tortured throughout my whole freshman year, I ended up becoming just like them.

I had a growth spurt over the summer leading up to Sophomore year, and suddenly I was a six foot wall of muscle. Needless to say, when my former tormentors got a look at me, they immediately left me alone.

Sure, I could have turned the other cheek. But a big part of me wanted to see them get what was coming to them. So for the next three years, they were the ones being shoved into lockers, and getting beaten to a pulp. Yes, I got detention more than a few times, and was even threatened to be expelled, but they never actually went through with it. Probably because I was the best football player in the school.

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention, I joined the football team as quarterback, and ended up winning the state finals for our school, which got me a scholarship to college. I even became head of the top fraternity on the campus. I could hardly believe that I had gone a wimpy nerd to the head honcho of the school. But like I said, I ended up becoming just like, if not worse than the ones who bullied me all those years ago. Why? I guess you could say that I realized that the bigger, more popular kids tormenting the smaller, geeky ones is just the natural order of things in any school, just like in nature and the food chain. And since I had gone from the latter to the former, I was obligated to continue the cycle.

Yep, those were the best years of my life, but as fate would have it, they were also the last. One night I was walking back to the frat house after an off campus party, when out of nowhere, I get hit by a drunk driver. And just like that, my life was over. Like I said before, I never really believed in the afterlife, so imagine my surprise when I found myself suddenly enrolled in Perdition University.

Upon arriving here, I realized two things, The first being, obviously, Heaven and Hell really do exist. And second, Hell loves irony, because from the instant I set foot in this school, I was suddenly the one on the bottom of the social ladder. And before you ask, no, I’m not the only damned soul here. There are plenty of others that are condemned to spend eternity alongside me here. The guys are mostly jocks and bruisers like I was, but here they’re treated like they were nerds by the much stronger and far more sadistic demon students.

Then there’s the girls, who were basically all the spoiled head cheerleader type in life. Now they’re mocked and relentlessly tormented by the demon girls here. Like I said before, Hell loves irony. Being dead, we don’t require food or sleep, so our day here is pretty much an endless loop. Constantly moving from class to class, then starting all over again. If you thought the students sounded bad, wait until you meet the staff. Right now I’m sitting in Ms. Zabill’s, a female demon’s, classroom as she is scratching out today’s lesson on the board with her long, sharp fingernails. With each stroke, a sharp, shrill screech pierces the silence and makes everybody in the room flinch or cover their ears.

When Ms. Zabill turns to face us, we see she has written on the board “Sin and Punishment 101” “Every single one of you has committed in one form or another, a sin for which you were not forgiven.” She says. “Now, I’m sure you all have some kind of excuse as to why you did what you did, but I’m here to tell you that it doesn’t matter.” She pointed to a girl sitting in the front row. “You, come up here and state your name and why you are here.” The girl, a blonde that looked around seventeen, stood up and faced the class. “My name is Cindy, and I don’t know why I’m here. I never did anything wrong in my life!”

Ms. Zabill rolled her eyes as though she had heard this a thousand times before, which to be honest, she probably has. “Really?” She says “So you don’t remember how you bullied the less popular girls when you were alive? How you targeted one girl, a certain Johanna Smith in particular, how you mocked her for her acne and braces, and drove her to drown herself?”

Cindy had no response, and could only cross her arms and pout. “It’s not like anybody cared about her anyway.” Ms. Zabill chuckled “You mortals, always thinking someone else is to blame. I suppose I should thank you. If your kind wasn’t so arrogant and prideful, I wouldn’t have this job.” Ms. Zabill Snapped her fingers, and Cindy suddenly burst into flames. She ran around the room, screaming like a banshee before finally collapsing on the floor as the fire continued to burn away her body until the only thing left was a black mark on the floor. Nobody in the room so much as batted an eyebrow. This sort of thing happened all the time here, and we all knew she would manifest again in an hour or two, ready for more punishment.

Next up was another girl, an enormously fat redhead. She waddled up to the front of the class and said. “My name is Janet, and when I was alive, I was the hottest girl in my school. All the boys would flock to me like birds, and I could have had any one of them that I wanted.” “So what happened?” Said Ms. Zabill, though something tells me she already knew the answer. Janet began to cry, and she half sobbed the rest of her story. “There was this fat girl in my class, and I would always tease her about her weight.” “Tease her?” Said Ms. Zabill “I think you did much more than that. Didn’t you?”

“Okay, Fine! Me and my friends mocked her and humiliated her every day!” Now Janet began to break down in tears. “And now I look like a human whale!” “That’s enough now.” Said Ms. Zabill "Take your seat.” For the next half hour, the class went on like this, with everyone telling what they did in life to end up here.They were all pretty much the same, basically they were all some popular girl or jock who made life for their classmates miserable, and now they get to spend eternity on the other side of the spectrum.

The bell rang, and my next class was gym, which was taught by a burly demon named Mr.Butch. He was one of the most sadistic teachers in the whole school, and believe me, that was no small feat. “Alright, mortals.” He said in his deep, terrifying voice “Today the boys will be lifting weights, while the girls will play volleyball.” To you, this might not sound so bad, until you take into account the fact that the weights at this school literally weighed several tons, and the volleyballs were made of fire and explode after a set time, so it was really more like a lethal game of hot potato.

I tried lifting one of those little mini dumbbells, and ended up dislocating my shoulder. But that wasn’t the worst of it, I saw this one dude who ended up getting crushed by the bench press machine, and another that actually succeeded in lifting one of the really big weights over his head with Mr.Butch’s help, only for him to immediately let go and let the weight drop down, literally bending the guy in half.

After gym, we had a free period, which was arguably the most dangerous part of the day,because the demonic students used this time to hunt down and torment their favorite targets. I ended up being held upside down by my ankles as two demons repeatedly dunked my head in a toilet bowl full of lava. Needless to say, by the time they were finished, my head was nothing but a blackened skull,and I had to go through the rest of the day like that. But I got off easy, compared to what they usually do to the others. But you want to know the worst absolute worse thing that could happen to you here?

Getting sent to the dean’s office. No body really knows what happens when you get sent there, because anybody who goes in never comes out. I’ve never even seen the dean (no rhyme intended), nor do I know if the dean is male or female.

Some speculate that whoever the dean is, he or she simply devours anyone sent to his or her office, and that soul vanishes from existence. Of course, that’s just a rumor, but I don’t know which is scarier, the rumor itself, or not knowing whether it’s true or if something much worse awaits anybody sent to the dean’s office.

You probably think that this all ends after graduation, but as I said before, this is no ordinary school. There is no graduation, we are all condemned to spend everyday in this school, forever. Why am I telling you all this? Because you never know when your life will end. You probably think you’re going to live well into your golden years, and that might be true. But the truth is, you could die at any moment of the day, be it from a heart attack, or some sort of accident, or maybe you were bitten by something poisonous. My point is, nobody likes an jerk, especially Heaven. So if you're like me when I was still alive, you had better straighten out real quick. If not, well, then I guess I'll be seeing you soon enough.