alwaysonapedestal

[alwaysonapedestal]

&&beca

          “ mm  – so did god literally bottle                 sunshine    when he made you?                 with a dash of dead presidents? “

  ‘ Probably.  He even sprinkled on a little bit of  sugar.     And you, then? Let me guess— a whole entire chili     pepper & the sarcasm to go with it. ’

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‘ well at least with a HEART OF STONE you won’t get hurt by stupid   guys. god knows we have enough heartbreak in this town already. ’

                                a sip at her own drink of choice, an exquisite             order that she had most of the baristas memorize by now.             she didn’t like  w a i t i n g  and much less she needed             someone to screw up the most important meal of the day             for her. something tucks at her  heartstrings  when the             inquiry is presented.  she can’t help but laugh a soft laugh             that she hopes will cover up the doubt in her eyes.

                           ‘ not really, no. ’

                     ▐ 「×× ＳＨＥ ＮＥＶＥＲ ＭＩＳＳＥＳ」;;

‘ oh, you know me serena. heart of stone & standards practically unreachable. ’ despite the TRUTH that weighs down her words, a slight smirk unfurls painted lips, underscoring her participation in serena’s good natured conversation. ‘ i’m very picky. not even romeo dribble over  there wins my affections. ’ sarcasm pulls at her lips as she sips at her coffee. ‘ i’m happy on my o w n. but how about y o u, huh ? ’

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I want to create my own career. A big part of wanting to start Preserve was that I need a world that is my own where I’m in charge of my success or failure at the end of the day. I want to be able to own that.

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                                         she’s relaxed, she’s had time to reflect on how         things might go between the two upon her return--  but  she hadn’t         expected him to chase her down. she loved it,  the attention and         the dramatics of it. fireworks,  though delayed, in the very pit of her         stomach seem to have  a  party  on her expense and it seems as if         she doesn’t truly even mind it. the desire to reach forward and kiss         him is almost overwhelming. he’s here and he’s saying  the words.         and she knows her response isn’t just an ‘okay’ it’s her  yelling  the         words inside of her mind even before they are aired.

              ‘ well if only to make it a more FOND                 of a memory--  i love you too dan. i                 never really stopped loving you. ’

             Doubt, but not in the dismaying fashion he anticipated,    precedes  her.  She’s   blonde,   beautiful,  sunkissed  and  looking   European and possibly like she  could  be  in love with him. There’s   a smile on her lips and the smallest quake in her voice. Dan knows   about nervous energy, had a  shaking  knee  the entire flight, so he   writes it off.   There’s a cliff they’re debating whether or not to jump,   after all, a little excess is to be expected.          ‘All I know is that I love you and I’m here, now.  Was it an          impulsive decision? yes. But more importantly I think it’s a          decision I’ll still be glad I made months from now                 ——- although how fondly I’ll remember it is hinging on          how a few things play out.”

  It’s a quiet attempt at humor but nonetheless true. He’s got all   the conviction he needs, now.   Though conviction does harsh    retrospect no favors. Everything relies on her.

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          ‘ today was pretty much what you should ALWAYS expect             from days that are as packed as this one was. it’s nothing             out of the ordinary, not really, but with jenny calling in sick             we just needed an extra pair of hands. so we  really  did             need someone to step in for her. and with  the  DRAMA             lately it’s something i had expected. ’

                              her being rather new here-- it was a good thing        and a bad thing. she hadn’t seen the worst yet and serena just        hated the idea of her finding out how toxic  the upper east side        could get.  it wasn’t  good  for anyone, not if they hadn’t come        across these sorts of things before.

           “Thank you, but really the coffee is more than enough.              I  truly  needed  the  caffeine after a day like today. Is              there  always  so  much  going  on? Or did today just              happen to be the exception?”

Wendy  was  accustomed to some form of drama or another but she had never seen things get quite so hostile or devious as she had since coming to New York.

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              ‘ --can’t say i haven’t heard that BEFORE, but                 this is something new. are you sure  you  didn’t                 mean to do that to SOMEONE ELSE? ’

                                a shrug of her shoulder now, no, she couldn’t    say that all of her suspicions towards the man  were  gone,  but    he was there complimenting her like this and it  was  something    she couldn’t just pass up. like a moth to a flame she was drawn    in by his words. she REALLY was no different. 

OH, now, now, dear.  there’s no need to be rude.  it was simply meant as a compliment.  pretty girl like yourself ought to be used to them by now.  though, no, probably not as often by a man old enough to be your father.               ( a little bit of charm never went amiss.  he wasn’t sure whether she’d                buy it or not, but it was worth a shot.  it worked so well on so many                       others.  and so far, she seemed no different than the rest. )

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                ‘ you’re too good to me richie. ’ 

         sadly? that’s probably the truth. she’s not the best friend ever. she hasn’t been that to anyone-- even blair? her best friend? she’s slept with her boyfriend-- LIED to her-- betrayed her time after time. and yet? they keep in touch, she would do anything for her.

                        while serena van der woodsen can be selfish, she would          never do anything to hurt her friends if she had a chance. she had          been  driven  to all of those things by one thing or another.  she          COULD be a good friend and she knew it. just look at dan-- -- and          nate.  both of them who had sure seen their fair share of her.  who          was she even kidding? she was only good for one thing and that?          that wasn’t going to help with richie.

                  ‘ and the offer goes both ways. you can ALWAYS come                     to me if you need anything. an escape? i  have  stupid                     girly movies i’ve seen  far  too many times with blair. i                     don’t know if-- guys do that sort of thing, but it  DOES                     take your mind off everything if only for 115 minutes. ’

                 “ no need for thanks, serena. “         the boy sits in silence for a moment, listening & processing.          there wasn’t much to say  —  not that wouldn’t be taken as          robotic & without meaning to be     —       i  n  s  i  n  c  e  r  e          that was the last thing richie wanted to be, to anyone,   let          alone a girl that he truly cared for.   one who without  even          asking,   the young businessman knew needed       friends.          &   not the sort of friends who call you after you’ve won the          race,   or who hug you briefly before getting knocked off by          the fist of booze when your party is the highlight of the year.         but the sort that bring you soup when your sick, picking out          the tomatoes because they know damn well that you can’t         stand them.  who watch that movie they hate because you          cherish it.  a person you can call at 3 am for an emergency          or for no particular reason at all. real friends. with big hearts,         warm hands,                                               &  — o p e n    e a r s                                              “ well if you ever need a soul                                                   to tell  ——-  or   NOT   tell                                                  rich manor is always open to you. “

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‘ i’m DEFINITELY more than okay with that. ’

                       it’s easy as that, her taking the coffee to go seemed like               a FAR better idea than staying to stare at the monstrosity that               might  haunt  her  dreams. she shudders just thinking about               having that in bed next to her--  god forbid one day she’d get               a bit too many drinks and end up with mr. drool over there.

                    ‘ seeing anyone? or should we look for a suitable                       candidate to fill that EMPTINESS in your heart? ’

                          ▐ 「×× ＳＨＥ ＮＥＶＥＲ ＭＩＳＳＥＳ」;;

     ‘ you’d better hold me back. i don’t think i can      control myself. ’ & her voice sings in a STINGING monotone.        jaded eyes gloss over with a gentle scrutiny, underscored by a        purse of crimson lips. she’s got a LETHAL way with words,        each one spoken is akin to a shard of glass, left unswept upon        the floor. ‘ why don’t we find something better to look at, i’m        getting a bit queasy. ’ 

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          ‘ chuck-- ‘

                               she doesn’t even know what to say. granted it                    wasn’t one of her best ideas but still to call her out on                    it seemed somewhat unreasonable. she couldn’t say,                    not really-- for if it’d been done to her? she’d be pretty                    ticked off as well. her turn to take a sip of the drink she                    had in hand ( one that hadn’t left her all night ) and take                    a deep, calming, breath.

         ‘ it was for the best.  you have to agree nothing good            could  have  come out of it had i told her the truth--            chuck, please, can you talk to her? i just want to get            my friend back. ‘                                       --again.

          ’ don’t sound so surprised, sis. ‘ he nods his head at the bartender before he turned to face her. the last place chuck truly  wanted to be was between serena and blair, unless it was without agonizing and more so  pleasurable. but he knew that would be nothing but a fantasy. the two fought more than cats and dogs. it surely made donald and trump and  rosie o’donnell look like amateurs. he smirked as  he sipped his glass of scotch, the extra kick gave him the necessary headache soother for being involved in such a mess.            ’ considering what you did to her,                  i’d say i was doing you a favor by                 accepting the invitation on her                 behalf. now what the hell were                 you thinking hiding a secret by staging a fight? ‘              

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                       oh it is romantic, there’s no doubt about that. she     doesn’t even want to know what he HAD to sell to get himself     across the ocean. it’s a smile that graces her lips at the words     that sound like pure heaven to her in this moment. she wanted     to get away, yes, clear her mind-- but with him here? it  was  a     real chance.

               ‘ dan-- are you sure we’re ready? are YOU ready? ‘ 

                                     it’s with somewhat of a more confused tone her        words are said in, it’s something in her voice that vibrates, nerves?        the guts he had to come here, find her? unbelievable. all of her life        serena van der woodsen had wanted to be saved by a prince and        this one may not be riding a white horse? but she’d be damned if he        didn’t fit the description.

                    The inevitable question expels from her lips in tones that aren’t the           most relieving to hear. It occurs to him only now that this may not be the            romantic gesture he had intended but an overstep. Dan wonders where           on the scale this attempt at grand romanticism lands.

                      His hand rubs at the back of his neck, expression quirking,               “ —- I’m beginning to wonder actually, but,” a pause, “sink or swim, right?”            Dan tries out a smile, hoping, praying he hasn’t completely misunderstood            the last of their conversations. “I guess, I just. We said that we should make            sure we’re ready and I’m ready. I don’t want to wait for something to get in            the way.”

[alwaysonapedestal]

1. Wasted - Tiesto ft. Matthew Koma // 2. Stay High - Tove Lo (Remix) // 3. Pursuit of Happiness - Kid Cudi (Remix) // 4. Memories - David Guetta ft. Kid Cudi // 5. Young, Wild, & Free - Snoop Dogg & Wiz Khalifa ft. Bruno Mars // 6. I Love College - Asher Roth // 7. Day & Night - Kid Cudi // 8. Get Lucky - Daft Punk ft. Pharrell Williams // 9. Like a G6 - Far East Movement // 10. Thnks Fr Th Mmrs - Fall Out Boy // 11. Hotel Room Service - Pitbull // 12. D.A.N.C.E - Justice (Remix) // 13. Bad Girls - M.I.A // 14. Don’t You Worry Child - Swedish House Mafia ft. John Martin // 15. (You Gotta) Fight For Your Right (To Party) - Beastie Boys

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[alwaysonapedestal]

[alwaysonapedestal]

            her friend was royally fucked up, more literally than the others.          she was the satan wearing high heels and the hell was  beneath          her feet wherever she went. that’s what she LOVED about her.          if she could count on anyone to  fuck  her  up  real  nice-- it was          her. and she wouldn’t ask what had driven her to drink this time,          neither would she. it would be  slurred  words  along with a shot.

                            so she takes the drink in hand and there’s a                         sharp gasp that follows the liquid when it  so                         easily gets swallowed, burning the whole  way.

               ' paint it red and see it in all the damn colors                  of the rainbow.  now for old times’ sake get                  me some of that stuff you’re on. ‘

she raises a brow as she watches her return to their old antics. lily would no doubt call helena in the morning but she didn’t  care what their mothers would say. she had her friend back with no sign of losing her any time soon. this was the beginning of many wild nights. eleanor doesn’t waste any time as she takes her hand and leads her to their private table. she signaled for a line and a round of shots before turning back to serena, handing  her a shot glass filled to the rim with tequila.                   ‘ welcome back to your real home, s                      here’s to a hell of a friendship now let’s                                  paint this town red. ‘