amaied17

[amaied17]

Sweet Girls 06

Candy ** She's been living a real life since their parents died. Pero ngayon, sobra syang kabado habang hinihintay ang pangalan nya para sa interview nya. She'd been a model for quite a while now to supporther studies and the studies of her two sisters. Confidence is like breathing to her. But now, oxygen seems hard to take in her system. "Number 28 po." She harshly exhale while standing on her heels walking towards the room. She couldn't hear the clacking of her heels because of her heart, thumping crazily inside her chest. "Good morning po, I'm Cand-" Nabitawan nya ang folder nya upon having an eye contact to that brown eyes. The same brown eyes who looked at her a couple of years ago with so much intensity as they moan each others name. "Good morning, Candy. Have a seat." pormal nitong saad. /How can you be calm? How can you act as if nothing happened?/ She swallow hard, fighting the urge to weep this instance. She pick her folder and take the seat in front of him. If he can play this game, she can play better. "You've been working as model for the last years, what makes you decide to work as an accountant instead? The former offer a better compensation, isn't it?" /You./ I wanted to scream. Naglie low sya sa pagmomodel two years ago because of this guy. She thought he loved her. But he didn't. He just wanted to get into her pants and he succeeded. He got her pregnant as well. But she lost it before she had the baby. Akala ng lahat, major subjects ang dahilan kaya di na sya masyadong tumatanggap ng projects. Which is plausible since they are Third year then. I let them believe what they wanted to believe. I never, /ever/ disclose information about this guy. She don't want anyone to know that she became a mistress once. She cleared her throat before she answer. "Yes, Sir. The former has a better compensation but it was never stable. I want to find a job that will give me a stability that I wanted."

[amaied17]

Sweet Girls 05

Jam ** Everyone’s crying, laughing and drunk already. We’re at the peak of our celebration and everyone is giving their Sorrys and Thank Yous. Natatawang tumayo sa mini stage nila si Jelly pero kitang kita ang ilang butil ng luha sa gilid ng mga mata at pisngi nito. “Walang hiya naman oh! Bakit second to the last akong magbibigay ng speech dito? Pero mas maswerte ako ng slight kay Ate Jam kasi last sya.” tumawa ito bago huminga ng malalim. “Magkikwento na lang ako. Para maiba. “I was never excited for college. Excited akong makagraduate. Nagkahiwalay kaming magkakapatid, I mean, nahiwalay /ako/ sa mga kapatid ko. I was helpless and got lost. Napariwara ang buhay ko, I learn to drink, to smoke, cut classes and a lot more shitty things. I thought I was happy, I thought I would enjoy college with them. But unluckily, those people I called my friends weren’t exactly what I thought they were. They told dirty things about me, behind me. Slut. Boyfriend-stealer. Player. Gold digger. User. A lot more. Dirtier.” Nanlaki ang mga mata nya nang marinig ang simula ng kwento ni Jelly. Lumingon sya sa Ate nila para lang makita ang kaparehong gulat sa mga mata nito. Alam nilang magkapatid na nabarkada ito sa maling tao. But they never knew she was bullied that way. “I turn into a doubter. I develop a great trust issue towards everyone trying to get into my life. Even my sisters. Isa lang pinagkatiwalaan ko noon, yung kapwa kong nabully. Hi Macky!” Natawa si Macky habang lahat ay halatang gulat sa kwento ni Jelly. Hindi mo mahahalata na nagkaroon ng ganung problema si Jelly o Macky. They are both happy persons, bully pa nga kung tutuusin. “Akala ko di na ko magkakaroon ng ibang kaibigan bukod kay Macky. Kaso ang kulit nyong lahat. You show me different kind of friendship. Yung pwede kong pagkatiwalaan. Yung ipagtatanggol ako kahit nakatalikod ako. Yung sasabihin sakin harapan yung pangit sa akin. Yung itatama ako kapag alam nilang mali ako. Yung naniniwala sakin at hindi sa sinasabi ng ibang tao. "My life would have been miserable without all of you. Iniimagine ko pa lang na si Macky lang makakasama ko until today, sa graduation, awang awa na ko sa sarili ko. Buti na lang, naawa kayo sa kagandahan ko, no?” Everyone laughed. Awe reflecting their eyes. “Saying thank you to each of you would be not enough. Thank you is an understatement. I am grateful that you came into my life. I hope you’d stay. Cheers to a good life ahead!” Everyone lifted their bottles and cheer. Tumayo sya para salubungin ang bunso nila pero bumalik ito sa stage. “One last thing though. I love you, Jayden. You are the best thing this friendship gave me.” Nagtilian ang lahat habang inaasar si Jaye. Nakangisi namang sumalubong sa kanya si Jelly. Agad syang yumakap rito. “I didn’t know. I’m sorry.” Naramdaman namin ang isa pang pares ng nga braso na yumakap samin. Narinig namin ang mahinang hikbi nito. “You never told us. Why do we have to know it this way?" “Drama nyo. It’s over Ate. Oh! Ikaw na Ate Jam. Good luck sa'yo. Top that speech, charot!” She kiss her cheeks before walking towards the stage. “Cum Laude yan! Ate ko yan!” Natawa sya sa sigaw ni Jelly. Nakaupo na ito sa pagitan ng ate nila at ni Jaye. Nakayakap si Ate Candy rito at hawak ang kamag ng Jaye. “Thank you, Guys! Okay, bye.” akma syang aalis sa stage pero bumalik din agad. “Just kidding.” She heave a breathe before she start. “Forever na lang ba akong mag-i-speech ngayon?” everyone laughed. “Kidding aside though, salamat sa inyo. Paulit ulit to, alam ko.” She smile. “Thank you for making me feel friended, kung may ganun mang term. I never had friends before. Home schooled ako before kasi nga sakitin. Di ako sanay na makisama sa mga tao. Handa na nga akong magtapos na walang kaibigan but you gladly offer me your friendship. Saling pusa lang talaga kaming magkakapatid sa grupo nyo pero open arms nyo kaming inampon at inangking parang isa sa inyo.” “All the sleepovers and overnights, all the surprise cakes and quizzes, all the quick naps and sharing of assignments, all the horror train rides after shitty exam and enjoyable bumping of cars after enrollments, all the heartaches and drunk cries, all the hindi magkasundong schedules kasi di na block section system, all the pikunan before checking of worksheet, and everything in between first year of enrollment and today. They are the most amazing moments of my life. I would never have it any other way.” If I would replay life when I die, I'd replay these four years with all these people.

[amaied17]

11/16/2016~ I've already celebrated 2 birthdays in Enbridge. I never had this surprise ever, well, I do not like surprises and I am on leave every birthday. but this kids, kahit na ilang sandali ko pa lang silang kasama, gave this kind of thing for me. sobrang gulat ako nung nakita ko yung cake, with my name. nakakanginig, di nga kasi ako sanay sa mga ganito. hi po! introvert here! well anyway, Thank You Team Implausibles! I love you kahit na sobrang stressed ako sa inyo. hahaha. ❤

[amaied17]

the introverted me never sign up for this but 😻

[amaied17]

Sweet Girls 04

* Jelly

“Babe!”

OA talaga ang lalaking ito, ilang oras pa llangang lumipas ng maghiwalay sila akala mo isang dekada ang lumipas. “Ano to? Ten years di nagkita?”

Tumawa lang ito bago mabilis na humalik sa mga labi nya. “Kumpleto na ba?” sabay akbay sa kanya papasok sa villa.

“Do you hear the wedding bells, Guys?” sigaw ni Mond ng makita silang papalapit.

Natawa sya nang batukan ito ni Ate Jam, yumakap naman ito bilang ganti.

“Ang pawis mo, lumayo ka sakin. Ano ba?!” halos tili ni Ate Jam habang tinutulak palayo si Mond.

Lalo namang inasar ang dalawa dahil sa kulitan nila. Napangiti sya. Bagay ang dalawa. Alam nyang may gusto si Mond sa Ate nya kaya lang ..

Napabuntong hininga sya ng mapansin ang pasimpleng pagsulyap ni Ate Jam kay Macky.

Yes, her sister is in love with her bestfriend. Napansin nya yun mula nung unang group project nila. Di nila kagrupo si Macky pero nakigulo ito sa kanila. Ang pamumula ng Ate nya habang magkatulong magluto ang dalawa ang bumisto dito.

Sadly, they are both my sister - my real sister and my soul sister.

“Alam na ng family nya.” bulong ko kay Jaye habang patuloy ang asaran ng lahat.

“Talaga?” kunot noo itong tumingin sa kanya. “How did it goes?”

Umiling lang sya.

“So sa inyo sya tutuloy mamaya?”

“Malamang. Wala naman matutuluyan yan e.”

“Eh, kung samin na lang sya tumuloy?”

“Ayaw. Baka bukas wala na kong jowa kasi napikot ka na nyan.” biro nya rito. Pero paglingon nya, seryoso pa rin itong nakatingin sa kanya. “Hon, don’t tell me nagseselos ka pa rin sa kanya. Napag-usapan na natin to diba?”

“Lalaki pa rin sya. Kahit pa sabihing bading sya. At di ko talaga gusto na nagtatabi kayong matulog.”

“That doesn’t sounds right pero Jayden, he’s my soul sister. Kung talagang may gagawin syang masama sakin, sana ginawa na nya. We’ve been sleeping in one bed for three years pero wala naman.”

“I’ll sleep with you, too. Sa sahig sya matutulog.”

Bumuntong hininga sya at blangkong tumingin rito. Pumikit ito at niyakap sya.

“Fine, I won’t. You don’t have to look at me like that.”

“Get a room will you?!”

Singit ni Macky sa kanila. Naramdaman nyang nagtense si Jaye pero agad din kumalma. Kinuha nito ang bote ng beer na inabot ni Macky.

“Share na lang kayo ha. Pagtyagaan nyo ang indirect MOMOL kasi lahat kami rito ay single.” natatawang sabi ni Macky bago tumalikod ang muling nakiasar sa barkada.

Bumuntong hininga ito bago tumungga sa boteng hawak. “You’ll not drink much tonight, okay?”

“Hindi naman talaga. I have to remember all moments of tonight.”

“I wanna share, too. A moment that has to do with quick and restroom.”

She saw the naughty glint in his eyes and she return an equally naughty grin at him. “Sounds great.” she wink “Later, Honey. We can do that when everyone’s drunk.”

[amaied17]

Sweet Girls 03

Jam **

Napaiwas sya ng tingin ng makitang hinalikan ni Macky si Jelly sa pisngi. She always hated her sister’s closeness to Macky. She’s been in love with Macky since the first time Jelly introduce him to them. Alam naman nyang walang namamagitan sa dalawa, even Jaye was fine with Jelly and Macky’s friendship. Sya lang talaga ang naiinis (at nagseselos) sa pagiging malapit ng dalawa.

“Ano, Jam? Tatayo ka lang dyan? Iaabot mo na sa dalawa yan. Sa kanila mo na ipaluto, magaling namang magluto si Macky e. Para hindi puro asaran ang gawin nung dalawa.”

Tumango lang sya sa ate nya. Nahagip pa ng mata nya ang pagkunot noo nito pero agad sya lumapit sa dalawa bago pa ito may sabihin.

“Punyeta ka! Ang dumi na talaga ng damit ko dahil sayo! Can’t you fucking see it’s white? You ass!”

“Kapag dumating si Jayden huhubarin mo din yan.”

“Pakyu po. Walang kwarto, walang hubarang magaganap. Wala akong balak na bigyan kayo ng live show. Hayo-”

“Jell, dinig na dinig ang pagmumura mo mula sa loob.”

Nanlaki ang mata nito bago ngumiti na parang batang nahuling nagnakaw ng chocolate sa ref. “Sorry na Ate. This bitch here deserves all the cuss in the world, eh.”

Macky just make a face at napangiti sya sa hitsura nito. He looks adorable making faces.

“Anong luto dito? Ikaw na lang kaya ang kasama kong magluto para namang may makatulong ako hindi yung nagsasaway ako ng bata.”

“Ulol mo. Bata ka dyan?” Jelly shriek.

Natawa sya. “Ang Ate na lang ang tulungan mo Jell. At magpalit ka na ng damit. Ang dungis mo na e.”

“Eto kasi e!” sabay siko nito sa tumatawang kaibigan. “Sige, Ate Jam, ikaw muna tumulong sa hayop na ‘to.”

She nod and her sister kiss her in the cheeks before stucking her tongue towards Macky. She run after that.

“Para talagang bata yun. 19 na ba talaga yun? Parang pang-9 years old ang mentality.” naiiling pero nangingiti nitong komento.

She felt that familiar pain again. She will never get use to their friendship, ever. Macky seems to know Jelly more than any of them, especially her and Ate Candy. Even Jaye, sometimes, do not understand Jelly’s sudden mood swings. But Macky can calm Jelly with a look, or at least tame her down when she was raging. If Jelly do not have a boyfriend, she’ll believe that they have a thing or something.

“So what are we gonna do with this?

[amaied17]

Sweet Girls 02

Jelly ** /Oh, there goes my future husband./ She giggled inside her head as she watch Jaye walks toward her He’s wearing a light blue long sleeves, slacks and a shiny black leather shoes. She grin. /Mukhang insurance agent ang boyfriend ko./ He was about to kiss her when she step back with disgust plastered in her face. He’s handsome alright. A handsome insurance agent. “Di ako kukuha ng insurance, Kuya.” Bigla syang inabot nito at muntik nang ma-out of balance. Napatili sya, catching almost everyone’s attention but she doesn’t care. She was in Jaye’s embrace in seconds after, laughing so hard. She hugged him tight as well and then there she noticed his parents. Agad siyang kumawala sa boyfriend pagkakita kina Tita at Tito. Natawa ito saka sya hinalikan sa gilid ng labi. Siniko nya ito at tinignan ng masama. She hates PDA in front of his parents. Mahigit dalawang taon na sila ni Jayden, at lahat sila iniisip na may nangyayari na sakanila. Including his parents. Lalo pa at nahuli silang naglalandi sa kwarto ng boyfriend. Sila lang ang naiwan sa bahay nila Jaye nung panahong yun. They were playing video games at natalo sya sa unang round. To distract him, she kissed his nape. The moment heated up. They end up in bed with Jaye on top of her. They were kissing and petting each other. Wala ng shirt si Jaye at bukas na ang blouse nya. And then, the door flew open with Tita and Tito gasping at the scene. Muntik syang ikasal few days before she turn 18! Buti na lang nadaan sa paliwanagan ang mag-asawa at nangako silang di na mauulit. Sa bahay ng mga ito. Well, they still make out. Madalas. Sa kwarto nya. But they never did it all the way. Parehas silang may pangarap sa buhay. Pag-aaralin pa nito ang bunso nila at siya, kukuha ng Masters nya. After that, they will be married and be each other’s first. Gusto nya mangiti sa naiisip pero nauunahan siya ng kaba. Gusto naman sya ng magulang ng boyfriend but her mind keeps on coming back to that moment na nahuli silang dalawa. “Congratulations, Jelly.” hinalikan sya sa magkabilaang pisngi ni Tita Len. Ganun din si Tito Val. Tapos ay inabot ang isang regalo. Gusto nyang maiyak. She do not have much memory of her parents. Bata pa sya ng iwan sa Tiya nilang malupit. At di sya naging malapit sa mga ito. The closest parents she got were the couple at the restaurant and Jaye’s parents. Hindi naman nagkulang ang mga Ate niya sa kanya. Pero, iba pa rin ang magulang talaga. The reason why she always wants his parents approval. Matapos magpaalam sa mga magulang nito, hawak kamay nilang hinanap ang mga kaibigan nila. They were near the entrance, laughing at Annie’s joke. “Eto na yung ikakasal!” Mon shouted when he saw us. I laugh and gave a hug to each of them. “God! I can’t believe we’re done in this shitty college! Hello, Real Life na tayo in a few. Nakakatakot na nakakaexcite.” “Basta, kasal muna bago baby ha.” asar ni Ate Candy samin. “Nako! Ninang na ata ako less than nine months from now.” gatong ni Jade. I laugh and the guy besides me turns red. “Shh! Wag nga kayo. Virgin pa si Kuyang magbebenta ng insurance. Walang baby for the next nine months. Mga next year na lang.” Everyone cheers and whistle as Jaye turns redder, if that’s possible. “Enough.” I coldly yell and they stop. And just like that we talk about other topics. Graduation came in a blur and it ended with tears in our eyes. We’re going to miss all those four years we had together through thick and thin, pass and fail, ups and down and all those sleepless nights in between. Overnight swimming ang graduation celebration na napagpasyahan naming barkada. After intimate lunches with each other’s family, diretso na kami sa reserved villa na napagkasunduan. Jaye's parents want us to come with them, her sisters decline but pushes her to go. She can't say no to future in laws, so she join their lunch. Matapos ang lunch date with Jaye's family ay nakipagkita na sya sa mga ate nya. Dala na ng mga ito ang mga gamit at lulutuin nila. They bought additional chips and drinks, sagot kasi nilang magkakapatid yung foods and drinks since nakakuha sila ng Ate Jam nya ng special awards. Nagulat sila nang makita si Macky sa villa. Agad syang lumapit dito at taas kilay na nagtanong, "Ang aga mo, Bud, problema sa bahay?" He rolls his eyes, "Tayo sa barbeque mamaya." tumango lang sya saka sila tumulong sa pagkuha ng mga gamit sa kotse ni Ate Candy. Sila ang nagbarbeque ni Macky habang inaayos naman ng mga ate nya ang gamit at lamesa. "Sinabi ko na sa bahay kanina." She stared at him, eyes and mouth wide open. "Pinalayas ka ba kaya ka maaga?" "Gaga, hindi naman. Muntik lang masapak ni Pudra kasi nga unico hijo tapos all girls pala kami. Buti napigilan ni Mama at Ate. Sinabi ni Mama na umalis na muna ako, papahupain lang ang galit ni Papa." he sighed and I hug him. "Paano kung di humupa galit ni Father Dear, iyak na lang ba ko, ganerns?" "You can cry now. Tapos sa hagdan ka na lang matulog since gawain mo naman yun kapag nauwi kang lasing. Or I can lend you Ate Candy's tent." patuloy kong hinahagod while he grunt in protest. "Just kidding, you know?" "Aampunin mo naman ako diba?" She roll her eyes in respond and proceed in preparing the meat. "Girly, di ka ba naawa sa dyosa mong bestfriend?" "Jelly ang pangalan ko Beks. Shaddap, kay?" "Leche kang gaga ka! Di ka naawa sa drama ko?" "Nope. Help me with this shit at pag-iisipan ko yang kaartehan mo Beks." pertaining to the charcoals in the grill. Syempre, di nya kayang pabayaan si Macky. He's the brother she never had, kahit na Ate nya din ito in real life. "Aamin ka na din ba sa barkada?" "Not tonight though. Kapag tanggap na siguro ako sa bahay saka ako magsasabi sa kanila." She smile at him. This is hard for him, she knows that, she won't rush him to be out immediately. "Alam mo namang nandito lang ako regardless diba?" He look at her with teary eyes and hug her tight. "Pota ka! Puti damit ko! Pasimpleng punas ka lang ng uling e!" He just laugh and kiss her in the cheeks. "Thanks, Buddy! You're the best." "I know, right?"

[amaied17]

On Iris, Basti, and their young and reckless love.

There’s a whole lot of talk surrounding the story of Till I Met You. There was Ali’s dilemma over his sexual orientation and his eventual coming out which was handled by the show quite incredibly if I may say so myself. And now, Till I Met You took on yet another controversial topic that people rarely ever dare bring up: Premarital sex (PMS).

PMS is the sexual activity performed between two consenting but unmarried people. In the case of Till I Met You, the two leads, Basti and Iris are the ones who engaged in it in their episode last October 25, #TIMYRunAway. There have been conversations from all over the web, from people old and young, liberated and conservative, with regards to why two young superstars like James and Nadine agreed to display such a controversial theme in their primetime teleserye.

Personally, I commend James and Nadine for being brave enough to take on the challenge. Why? Because it’s a story that needs to be told. Newsflash: PMS is happening everywhere, especially among our youth. We just don’t like to talk about it as a society because for so long, we have built such a negative stigma around PMS as a concept. But just ‘cause we don’t like to talk about it doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen around us.

To better put things in context, let’s state some facts. According to Comedis (2015), based on a 2002 nationwide study called 'Young Adult Fertility and Sexuality Study’, 23.2% of adolescents have engaged in PMS. Comedis (2015) also states that sexually transmitted diseases and HIV rates are higher than ever. Young people are especially prone to the traps of PMS. I did a little research and according to Chihurumnanya et al. (2016), younger people who engage in PMS are likely to engage in riskier sexual behavior. Such unsafe sexual activity thus yield higher exposure to unwanted pregnancies, HIV, and other sexually-transmitted diseases and infections. (Honestly, I didn’t even need to research this, it’s pretty much common sense but it’s better to source things for appreciation).

Wang (2016) states that parents are considered as the most prominent among all socializing agents of sexuality for their kids. A young person’s knowledge about sex, along with their attitudes, standards of sexual conduct, and their norms about the sociocultural aspect of sex are also affected by their parents. Furthermore, studies show that families with strong communication channels and ones which are open to sexual topics decrease the likelihood of a child engaging in risky sexual behavior (Gumban et al., 2016).

These are just some of the very many studies out there showing the importance of talking about PMS with our youth. For so long, generations upon another see the concept of PMS as a taboo subject. Parents usually don’t talk to their kids about it or they usually walk on eggshells when it’s the topic (if it ever becomes the topic). In addition, our country, being a predominantly catholic country, doesn’t have the proper programs in place to educate our youth about PMS and its consequences, if any. The result: Young people who engage in PMS tend to keep it a secret.

Here’s the problem: Young people do it. Like it or not, the curiosity of the young is not a controllable variable. So what do we do about it? We need to talk about it. We cannot solve the issues associated with PMS if we refuse to acknowledge the very real condition of PMS rampancy in our country. I’m not saying that we should tolerate PMS. Of course, if it’s done between two people who are very much unprepared for the possible consequences of premarital intercourse, then that could lead to some very serious repercussions. All I’m saying is, as a society, it’s better that we educate our youth rather than shame them for it. We should stop sweeping PMS under the rug and acknowledge it for what it is. We can all have different views about PMS from a moral standpoint and I can respect that. But on a national health development standpoint, understanding PMS, the issues associated with it, and taking the proper actions to educate our youth about it are all very, very important steps.

Going back, I respect the Till I Met You team for showing how reckless and young love can lead to decisions you might not necessarily feel good about the next day. So it’s important to really evaluate your actions beforehand and make sure that you are ready to face the consequences of all the decisions that you make. Being young is not and should not be an excuse for being reckless and stupid when it comes to matters of sex. I’m personally excited for the journey of Basti and Iris and how their decision will affect their future because I am sure it will teach a lot of young people a lesson or two. Also, it’s good that with their stature as a prime loveteam, they brought PMS to light, because it helps remove this negative stigma that we’ve associated with it for far too long which has, in turn, prohibited us from making any forward motions in both the health and sociocultural understanding of PMS.

On a different note, some people– haters, in particular– are taking this arc as an opportunity to shame James and Nadine for portraying their characters (quite effectively, I may add). They’re saying that James and Nadine are being bad influences to our youth because they portrayed PMS on screen. Pardon my French but that’s so fucking stupid, yes? I don’t watch Breaking Bad and think “Hmm, I want to build a meth lab now.” You have a brain, use it. Don’t underestimate our youth, they have brains too, you just have to reinforce the concepts properly. Till I Met You showed that people respond to losing their virginity differently especially when they feel they weren’t necessarily prepared for it. Iris cried because she knew she may have made a mistake. This is the part where parents come in to reinforce. A television show cannot do all the work. Therefore, if you allowed your kid to watch a show which was very appropriately rated by the Movie and Television Review and Classification Board for “Strong Parental Guidance”, then the ball is in your court. How will you use this opportunity to teach your kid a lesson? If you choose not to and blame your kid’s actions on a television show after, then that’s on you. Don’t burden a television show with your responsibilities as a parent.

I have said way more than I had originally expected to say about this. Bottomline: You go, TIMY coco, four for you, TIMY coco. And JaDine? Momma’s proud of you and your work ethic. Keep it up.

[amaied17]

it's November 3 ! and it's raining :) *** that rainy evening five years ago, this two become official. two years (and some months) after that, they broke up. that's nearly three years ago - when I broke your heart and shatter mine that's nearly three years - when I start becoming a mess that I barely recognize myself please ?! lemme go back to that rainy evening five years ago, lemme rearrange my life a couple of year after that, lemme stay with you, lemme stick to you .. if only I could , would you let me be ~

[amaied17]

Sweet Girls 01

Candy **

“Ate! Patulong naman dito oh.”

She rushed to Jell’s room upon hearing her. Naliligo pa si Jam kaya sya lng ang pwedeng tumulong sa kung anumang dilema sa buhay ng bunso nila.

Naabutang nyang nakasimangot ito habang hawak ang isang strappy heels na ipinahiram nya rito. Natawa sya sa naabutan at lalong lumalim ang simangot ni Jelly.

“Hindi ko alam kung paano isuot to. Kalahating oras ko na syang dinadasalan. Bakit ba kasi qng daming tali nito pinahiram mo, Ate?”

she laugh harder. “Sabi mo kasi pinaka safe at pinaka mababang heels ang ipahiram ko. Ayan na yun.” Lumapit sya dito at isinuot ang sapatos sa paa nito.

“Wow!” sumipol ito matapos nya maisuot ang sapatos. “It just took you seconds to fix that bitch on me? Anong kapangyarihan ang meron ka? Pahingi naman ako!”

“You should learn to use those. Hindi puro converse ang ginagamit mo.”

Napangiwi ito at sinubukang tumayo. “They are more human friendly and comfortable. How am I suppose to walk and run with this?”

This lass never fail to amuse her. Sa kanilang magkakapatid, ito lang ang hindi mahilig sa girly stuff. She actually loathe them; skirt, make ups and high heels. Maybe because she’s atheletic at sagabal dito ang mga iyon. Mas okay ito sa baggy shirt, shorts and converse.

Tinulungan nya itong tumayo at maglakad papuntang sala.

“Lord, paano po akong magmamartsa ng hindi namamatay sa gamit na ito?”

“Maganda sense of balance mo. You’ll live.’

"This shit you girls call shoes is death.”

Bumitaw ito at sumubok maglakad patungong couch. Muntik matapilok, pero buti talaga matindi ang sense of balance nito. See, she’ll live.

“That’s it! I’m bringing my converse with me!” pabagsak itong umupo sa sofa nila.

“They doesn’t fit your dress, Sweetie.”

Matalim ang mga mata nitong tumingin sa kanya na agad nanlaki pagkakita sa bitbit na make-up kit.

“This is nightmare came to life." namumutlang sabi nito. "Wake me up, please?"

Nailing syang lumapit dito. “Light make up lang. You don’t need much make up kasi maganda ka naman.”

She scoff. “As if. Ikaw ang pinakamaganda, ang Ate Jam ang pinakamatalino and Ako? Wala. Design lang ako sa buhay na ito.”

Napabuntong hininga sya sa sinabi nito. Akala nya, si Jam mang pinakamababa ang self esteem sa kanilang magkakapatid. No, this girl’s self esteem is way lower. Sa totoo lang, ito ang pinakamaganda at pinaka matalino sa kanila.

Unlike her, di nito kaylangan ng make up para maging maganda. With her naturally soft and curly hair, smooth skin na di ata natutubuan ng pimples, her tiny nose, almond eyes and thin pinkish lips (she wonder why it’s still pink even she actually smoke) - she’s indeed more beautiful than her older sistera. Isa pa, di nito kaylangan magkilay because it was already perfect. Kilay is life, right?

At kung talino naman, kung hindi ito sumasideline ng tutor at hindi nagpart time as crew sa isang fast food chain - malamang Cum Laude rin ito gaya ni Jam, baka Magma Cum Laude pa nga. Jam had to do an all nighter to perfect an exam and this kid could have a couple of mistake at most after a GY shift at work. Nakakuha ito ng Academic Excellency Award nang stock knowledge lang ang baon sa araw araw, ganun lang din ang baon nya lagi pero no award for her. Mas gusto nitong magbasa ng novels than reference books on a class but could point out a mistake in a mathematical equation with a glance.

Madiskarte pa ito. Never itong nanghingi ng kahit na ano sa kanya. Nagulat na lang kami nang may iuwi itong mga piraso ng kahoy at puno na ang shelf nya na gawa roon. They never bought her book too, the first time, and the last time, they did that - naging dalawa ang kopya nito ng librong iyon. Latest release pa yun, she got her copy on the first day it was released and it's a bit pricey kasi hardbound.

Sandali lang nya itong nilagyan ng make up. Matapos ng ilang minuto, tapos na sya.

“Ang bilis mong kumilos. Nakakainis.”

Natawa sya. That was part of her job. Isa syang model at kaylangan mabilisan ang kilos. She learn to change outfits in a minute, learn to change her looks in another minute then walk in front of the crowd in the next.

She started when she’s 16. Ilang buwan matapos mamatay ang mga magulang nila dahil sa trabaho ng mga ito. They got into illegal drugs when she’s 13. Nagkasakit kasi si Jam noon, kaylangan ng pera. Walang malapitan dahil hirap sila sa buhay. Naging okay naman ang buhay nila nung pumasok sila sa trabahong yun, buhay nga lang nila ang kapalit. Kaya isang taon matapos nun. Inilipat sila ni Nanay sa Laguna, sa isa sa kapatid nito.

Mahirap ang buhay nila sa Laguna. Inaalila sila ni Tiya Lusing. Minsan din syang sinaktan ng ilang linggong di nakadalaw si Nanay at Tatay para sa sustento nila. At nung mamatay ang mga magulang, iniwan sila. Hindi nakabayad ng renta ng ilang buwan si Tiya kahit laging nag-aabot si Nanay para sa pagkain, baon at upa. Nahilig pala sa sugal si Tiya at napakaraming utang. Buti na lang, katatapos lang ng pasukan noong palayasin sila. Nag-empake sila at doon nya nakita ang isang envelope na galing sa mga magulang.

Nakalagay rito ang ATM at mga susi, kasama ng dalawang sulat. Isa mula kay Nanay at isa mula kay Tatay. Kay Nanay galing ang ATM, lahat ng ipon ng mga ito ay nandoon, nakalagay rin ang PIN para sa ATM. Kay Tatay galing ang susi,, para ito sa maliit na bahay sa Quezon City. May address nga sa baba ng sulat. Parehong humihingi ng tawad ang dalawa. Nasa panganib ang buhay ng mga ito kaya hindi masyadong nakakadalaw nung huli.

Dahil hindi naman halata ng 16 pa lang sya nung panahon na yun, di sya nahirapan sa makuha ang pera sa ATM. Sabi ni Nanay ay kunin nya lahat ng pera na naroon. Pwede ko rin daw gamitin iyon pambili ng gamit para sa bahay at groceries basta masiguro ko lang na said ang laman noon ngayong buwan at masira ang ATM matapos.

Medyo mahihirap naman ang mga kasamahan ng mga magulang sa trabaho para hanapin silang magkakapatid. Lahat sika ay nakasunod pa rin sa apelyido ni Nanay. Hindi pa kasi sila kasal ni Tatay ng ipanganak sila. Sampung taon sya ng ikasal ang mga ito, aasikasuhin pa lang sana ni Nanay ang mga pangalan nila kaso hindi na natuloy.

She hated their mother’s name. Tinam-isan. Lahat sila matatamis din ang first names - Candy, Jam and Jelly. Doon daw kasi naglihi si Nanay nung dinadala sila. But now, she’s grateful with her mother’s name. They are safe.

Ligtas pero hindi madali. Di sya tumuloy sa kolehiyo kaagad nun. Pero di nya pinatigil ang dalawang kapatid. Parehong nasa Third Year High School ang dalawa. Kahit marami pang natirang pera mula sa naipon nila Nanay, naghanap pa rin sya ng trabaho. Sa isang kainan sa labas ng village sya unang nakahanap ng trabaho bilang waitress. Naging malapit sya sa mag-asawang may-ari ng kainan at nang malaman na nais syang kunin bilang model ng di kilalang tao ay nagduda ang mga ito. Parang anak na ang turing ng dalawa sa kanilang magkakapatid, gawa marahil ng di nagkaroon ng anak ang mga ito.

Laging bumabalik ang nagpakilalang Talent Manager sa kainan at lagi syang tumatanggi. Hanggang isang araw, kasama ng Talent Manager si Zade Cortez. Isa sa pinka kilalang model sa loob at labas ng bansa. Doon sya napapayag na magmodel.

Anim na taon na siyang model ngayon. Di naman sobrang sikat pero kilala ng karamihan. Medyo naglie low sya sa pagmomodel nang sumabay sa kolehiyo sa dalawa nyang kapatid.

At ngayon ang graduation day nila.

[amaied17]

It was you

I stare blankly at the leaves. The wind blewing my hair messy. The sunlight touching my skin. The noise diappearing from my background. Everything else gone. What matters is the beauty of nature, the dancing leaves in a hot summer morning.

I smiled. After a while I stand up and walk my way to school.

I bumped into someone. I murmured a “Sorry” without looking who was it and half-run to my room because of embarassment. I didn’t look when someone called me. I just sat at my seat, my head still hung low. I don’t have friends. They don’t want to be friends with weird like me. They always make fun of me, bully me. I don’t care. It’s the last school year anyway, after this I’ll be free. I hope.

**

“Why do you spend time staring at those leaves?”

I thought I was dreaming when I heard a voice beside me. Did just somebody talked to me ? I sighed. That was impossible.

“You always do that?”

I lazily look beside me. I know, I’ll be disappointed. There’s so many time I had dreamt of someone talking to me. But four years had past, nobody dared. My eyes widen when I saw someone. I blink, my mind is just playing with me, I know. But the person beside me didn’t gone.

He smiles, “Hi. Why do you keep staring at those leaves?”

I swallow the lump in my throat. “I-I..” why was my voice doesn’t sound feminine? “I don’t know. They are relaxing.” I shifted my gaze from the guy to the leaves.

“Are they?”

“Don’t you find them amazing? They are nature’s gift to human. What would happen if there’s no trees? The world would be more poluted than it already is. We still have the previlage to breathe half fresh air. They are amazing. They take all the bad air for us to have somehow a good one. I am staring at them for appreciation. Good things should be appreciated, right?” I smile.

“Yes, good things should be appreciated.”

I look at him, a smile still plastered in my face. He just stare at me as if I am a leaf. A blush crept at my cheeks. He smile wider. We went to school together after that. I wonder, why I didn’t bump in to someone today.

I look behind me, to the place that I am supposed to bump someone.

“What are you looking at there?”

“Nothing. Something just odd happen.”

“Like?”

“I was suppose to bump into someone there. But it didn’t happen.”

I could feel his intense stare at me. I look at him confuse and he just smile. “Of course you wouldn’t bump into that someone. You are already walking with him.”

[amaied17]

made another IG account so my books can do a photoshoot (kuno) 😂

[amaied17]

me XD

What was that word again that describes people who hoard/collect books? Not necessarily to read them either.

Tsundoku 積ん読 (つんどく) is a Japanese word (informal) for the act of leaving a book unread after buying it, typically piled up together with other such unread books.

It is the way one buys books and not reading them at all, letting them pile up unread on shelves or floors or nightstands.

tsundoku: compound of 積む (tsumu, “to pile up”) +‎ 読 (doku, “to read, reading”); contraction of 積んでおく (tsunde oku, “to leave piled up”)

[amaied17]

it hurts oh-so-bad

it's been more than a couple of year since we broke up. I should be over you, I was the one who gave up anyway, but (maybe) I'm not. I scan through your instagram account and found a post about Valentine's Day, my heart painfully clench as I imagine you (like in that photo) kissing someone else. you'll probably get over me or perhaps you are already over me - and the thought killed me. why does it hurts this much if I choose to walk away from you two years ago? why does it hurts this much if I choose someone else over you? why does it hurts this much thinking you in someone else's arms but I don't want you back because I know you deserve someone else who's not like me, who isn't me? why does it hurts oh-so-fucking-much? why does? W H Y ?

[amaied17]

if I could redo one thing in life. I would redo you ❤

[amaied17]

Dirty Lil Secret

WHO WOULDN'T LOVE JC SANTOS ? panty creamer ampota. ngiti pa lang gusto mo na umungol e. huhu. this is so dirty ! pero seryoso na nung unang beses ko narinig ang boses nya, I growled it's so embarassing. ano nga ba yung sabi ni Dustin? the way Lia said Babe parang dinidilaan sya sa tenga. that's exactly it when I first heard his voice. M A L A L A ! ! !

[amaied17]

3AM thoughts are crazy