amatusvanitas - Tumblr blog

[amatusvanitas]

[amatusvanitas]

[amatusvanitas]

when a pelican bites you there's no malice in their eyes. they aren't upset at you. they are just hungry and want to see if you fit in their mouths. and if you don't then it's no problem and everything is fine. and if you do then well i guess your fate is sealed but that's ok it's a beautiful animal

[amatusvanitas]

been thinking about sigourney weaver‘s ‘manic mondays’ laugh lately

[amatusvanitas]

Subtle insults:

I feel like you are very involved in your local HOA

You seem like the type to really care about their property values

I fucking hate you and want your car to get hit by a very fast train

I can see you have no need for the bus

Wow, I can see the historic 1950s feel of your neighborhood

[amatusvanitas]

[amatusvanitas]

[amatusvanitas]

Yarn holder

[amatusvanitas]

For some reason we were given access to custom emojis on teams and it took people less than 24 hours to add the logo of the local unemployment office and start using it as a reaction when something goes wrong or upper management announces another shit decision

[amatusvanitas]

Hey, no homo, but I am sitting on the broken swing set out back in the perfect, quiet, 2:00am blackness and picturing the softness of your voice and the darkness of your eyes with such perfect and terrible clarity that it feels like I'm choking on my own heartbeat.

[amatusvanitas]

Back in 2017 I signed up for one of the Cards Against Humanity sillies and did their Cards Against Humanity Saves America. Basically they were like fuck Tr*mp and his border wall and used the funds from the campaign to buy land and to make all 150,000 contributors part owners of said land across the US/Mexico border.

It was fun and silly and I got a little certificate.

Today I got an email that Elon Musk illegally annexed that land for SpaceX and that CAH are suing him over it. So possibly I’ll get like $100 if they manage to win a lawsuit and stick it to Musk. It’s like even more bang for my original buck.

[amatusvanitas]

[amatusvanitas]

#Moo Deng is literally the cutest menace I have ever seen

[amatusvanitas]

the weekend's here

[amatusvanitas]

I’ve been waiting a year to post this

[amatusvanitas]

You said it made you happy when I smiled, didn't you?

[amatusvanitas]

i think im insane