amayanplayboy

[amayanplayboy]

Falling Behind The Line

{It didn’t take me long to move into action as soon as @ElJefeOfOakland said we were leaving. I nodded at @OnceHerPrince glancing back at @AReapersRose for a second before getting on my bike and starting to follow @ElJefeOfOakland. We had suffered a great loss when we all lost Pedro, but now we were also suffering from the loss of @HappilyArmed. I have no idea what went on inside that house, but I know that @AReapersRose knows and eventually she’s going to tell all. I knew that I wasn’t going to take us long to get there but as far as the emotional toll it was going to take on all of us that was going to be at the extreme level. Usually, @OnceHerPrince and Pedro acted as @AReapersRose’s bodyguards when @HappilyArmed wasn’t around. Now she probably felt as vulnerable as ever. I wanted to tell her that everything would be okay, but right now I didn’t even know that for sure. I hated the uncertainties that were about to follow, but I knew that going to Lodi was a level of safety for all of us that SAMCRO wasn’t prepared for. In some cases I missed my daughter right now, but I was thankful she was nowhere near the amount of chaos that surrounded me. I let my bike come to life as I waited for everyone else to make a move. Hearing @AReapersRose give orders like that put me in some sort of ease, but not nearly enough. I knew that once we were in Lodi she would relax, but until we were all there and all accounted for everyone was on edge including me. I’m usually the laid-back one, but after all of the tragedies that I’ve witnessed or been through lately I’m not as laid-back as I once was. I need to be on high alert until I know that everyone I care about is out of harms way.}

[amayanplayboy]

Trying To Help

{I had decided that staying hidden wasn’t my best option. Once everybody started coming outside and I heard more gunshots I knew I needed to be around and make my presence known. I looked around the crowd and saw the @AReapersRose holding her son. She was visibly shaken, but I couldn’t quite put my finger on the reason for it. I know the loss of Pedro and even the loss of @OnceHerPrince was probably getting to her now. I looked around at the various people standing around the house. I blinked twice when I saw someone that resembled @OnceHerPrince standing by the door. I wanted to go talk to him, but I thought it was my own mind playing tricks on me. He turned his head and I could see the property of tattoo on his neck. That was for sure my best friend. I don’t normally cry, but knowing fully well that @AReapersRose was going to be okay because he was still breathing meant a lot to me. There were so many people in this small driveway that it was hard to keep track of who was who and what was going on. I knew that this was all @AReapersRose and her extended family. I’m a part of it to an extent, but that was more Pedro than it was me. I wanted to walk over to her and tell her that I was here, but I wasn’t sure if that was a good idea. Knowing fully well what happened when she went to @TheOriginalSOA when she was pregnant with @AMayanPrince I decided it was better to walk over and do what Pedro would've done. I smiled softly not saying very much because I is I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t like this guy and I never will, but I understood why @AReapersRose was trying to mend fences. I kissed her cheek and ruffled @FutureNinerKing’s hair trying to use some of the tension that surrounded us, but I don’t think it’s working.} Lexi, do you need anything, mama? {No, I wasn’t flirting with my best friend’s girl it’s just how we talk to her in Oakland and if I had talked to her any differently she probably would’ve gotten upset.}

[amayanplayboy]

What Did I Miss?

{I wasn't going to follow @ElJefeOfOakland, but something told me I should maybe for his own safety or just out of pure curiosity. With everything going on in the loss of Pedro I need something to keep me occupied. Following @ElJefeOfOakland seems to fit the bill although I don't think he knows that I'm trailing him. We hit the Vegas line and I wondered what kind of business he would have here today, but I knew better than to ask. When he pulled into a private driveway I froze. After he walked to the front door I carefully turned off my bike and made my way toward the driveway. @OnceHerPrince’s bike was in this driveway as well. Where were we? Why did @ElJefeOfOakland feel it was necessary to come here? Something had to be important. It was then I saw the unmistakable silhouette of @AReapersRose standing in the doorway at the house. I was trying to stay out of sight because if @ElJefeOfOakland knew I followed him there was going to be a problem. He hated being followed by anyone unless he asks for you to do it. I was just concerned, but then I hear @ElJefeOfOakland yell for @OnceHerPrince. What in the world is going on here? Is @OnceHerPrince alive? I took a step back making sure that I was still out of sight but trying so hard to figure out what was going on. @AReapersRose looked upset and maybe a little shaken, but I can’t figure out why. I want to be right where the noise is, but I already know that if I'm spotted I'm going to get in trouble for it. I rubbed the back of my neck nervously keeping my eyes locked on the door. I had a feeling that something bad was about to go down and the worst part about it all was I just couldn't put my finger on what the problem was.}

[amayanplayboy]

Torn Between My Orders and My Feelings

{I couldn't remember the last time I was this wasted. Two of my boys were dead and @AReapersRose was the one that was getting blamed. I couldn't believe that shit because she was the fucking queen. Even though @AReapersRose and @OnceHerPrince weren't together anymore he still made sure that she and little Los were taken care of. Hell @OnceHerPrince paid for that little girl's funeral. I believe she belonged to @AReapersRose's VP, to this damn not really sure. I just can't seem to wrap my head around the fact that one of my best friends is dead along with the other one. What the hell happened? It's not like @AReapersRose to want something to happen to @OnceHerPrince. I still don't know why they broke up because the two of them are very private people. The way @AReapersRose use to watch him move, it was like she was afraid of him, but then a few hours later she would be completely different. I don't understand and I don't think I ever will. I know that Marcus has ordered us to justify @OnceHerPrince’s death by going after @AReapersRose, but that is not something I want to do. She's my friend and I don't know what happened between them, but I have a hard time believing she was okay with him being murdered by one of her boys. I really wish I knew the truth, but going to find @AReapersRose right now is not an option because I know if she saw me it would make her pain that much worse. I took another swing of my tequila hoping that at some point it would numb the pain and make me pass out, but so far nothing was working. I closed my eyes and I was brought back to the night @OnceHerPrince had told me that @AReapersRose and him had broken up. I had never seen him so emotional before. How I got him to survive those few weeks, how I got him to survive this far is beyond me. I know that the two of them were working together to raise Carlos, but you could still see there was unresolved pain between the two of them. I wanted to call her and check on her, but I knew that if anyone found out I was talking to @AReapersRose I would be the next one that they were planning to bury. The bottle of tequila was empty and I took it and threw it against the wall watching it shatter into a million pieces before finally letting the tequila allow me to fall asleep.}