My heart is full today, full of indescribable, invincible sorrow, my eyes have watered, more than once, more than I would like to admit, I'm not myself, a stranger, a lost entity. Overwhelmed with rage, sadness and unknown emotions, I'm defeated today. I refuse to be saved, for I'm certain, I'll rise tomorrow or someday............
“I think perhaps love comes from finding someone you feel utterly comfortable with, someone who makes you comfortable with yourself. It’s like…finding yourself, or maybe it’s like finding the other part of yourself.”
a big part of self compassion is keeping touch with your inner self. many times when you're feeling numb and empty it's when you're ignoring the pain you're going through, and on the surface everything seems fine, but if you peek inside, your inner child is scared, crying or in need of care and attention because really, the small version of you who is extremely vulnerable to pain and desperately needs reassurance and comfort will always be there. even if you have lots of reassurance from other people, you need to be there for you, and your presence is the most important and comforting for your younger self. instead of seeking distractions or always relying on someone else to tell you what to do, you need to be there for your inner child and hug them and tell them using your wisdom and optimism that everything is going to be ok, even if you don't believe in it fully, because at the end of the day it's you who understands yourself most, it's you who knows everything you've been through, it's you who knows why you acted in certain ways, it's you who can empathize best with your trauma, and it's you who can best make yourself feel heard, comforted and safe. you have the power to sit with them and talk to them with the deep kindness and understanding that they rarely received from others. you can't ignore yourself and shut everything away hoping it will resolve on its own, because if you saw your younger self upset you would want to love and comfort them instead of neglecting them. your inner child needs you, and is the version of yourself who needs the most love, kindness, understanding and care from you.