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It's kinda funny when you get a bunch of likes but no reblogs like I enjoyed your post but I'd prefer if no one else saw it

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ITS APRIL 13 YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS

FETCH ME NEIL

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Buck is such an interesting character because it's like he's always actively trying to think... but also avoid having that heureka moment.

On some level he already knows he won't like the end result of the equation he's subconsciously been working on. What Eddie really means to him. Because it might hurt. So Buck's procrastinating, gaslighting himself. Basically doing anything he can do to avoid opening that scary little box in his mind palace, the one with the right answers.

He doesn't really want to understand his feelings for Eddie. He just keeps telling himself they're totally normal, friendly feelings, and hey Eddie is a handsome man, so it's just natural that it's difficult to stop looking at Eddie!!!

So sweep, sweep, goes Buck and explains his reactions under the rug. He keeps telling himself he doesn't need to investigate these feelings because these totally aren't the droids he's looking for. Nope.

So he avoids those discoveries. Sleeps on them. (Unlike Eddie, who couldn't stay asleep and found that box in his mind palace way earlier. And promptly started dying on the inside. "Shit, I actually love him, and he's probably straight. He's only dating women. He says he's an ally. Yeah, he's straight isn't he. FML. Guess I've got to move on.")

Still, Buck also can't really stop himself from gravitating towards Eddie. He just keeps telling himself that it's because Eddie is his bestie, and of course he cares about his best friend!!

But still... When Buck was coming out to Eddie, he was hyper vigilant of Eddie's reactions.

And when Eddie said nothing had to change between them... it stung. It somehow felt... hurtful, disappointing, to get that reaction, even though Buck pretended it did not hurt.

But maybe for a moment... There had been some vague idea of hope, gathering.

But Buck has perfected the art of explaining his emotions away. So once again he quickly swept those feelings; anticipation, disappointment, pain, all of it... under a rug. Came up with alternative reasons for feeling that stuff.

And then he ran to his next bandaid. And kept clinging to it like it was a life-raft in a storm, the only thing stopping him from drowning.

But the problem is... Procrastination and distraction techniques only work for some time. That rug? It's getting awfully bulky. Lots of stuff swept under it over the years. At some point... He'll trip over it. And can no longer pretend that stuff isn't there.

I think that's happening now. Or perhaps already did. Either way, Buck's head is spinning.

"Okayyyy eyes strictly ahead, I can't just ogle my best friend! Damn do I kinda want to though... But that's fine, it's totally normal that I want to look! It doesn't mean anything, I'm just bi, and Eddie's like a 10, of course I want to look.

...But I can't, he's my friend. ...Omg WHYYY isn't he wearing pants?! Who just opens a door not wearing pants? Eddie, apparently. Is this what Eddie always does when he's home alone?! Just runs around not wearing clothes?

Oh my god... did I interrupt something...? Okay, don't open that door. Nope. No! NO!

Can I. uhh. Tell him to put on pants or will that make it more awkward?

Fuck, and he's so chill, does he even remember that I'm bi?! Of course he does. But he's straight and cool with me being bi. And confident in his body. So of course he doesn't even care that he's putting on a show for me. Omg. I actually can't tell him to put on pants now. That would just make it weird. And it's not weird. It's not! We're just mates, chilling. No dress code."

And then...

"Oh... He's really moving, isn't he. Then I won't see him that often.

Of course I won't, El Paso isn't that close. How many miles is it, to El Paso? Oh. Fuck. So many... How often will Eddie be able to visit? How often can I visit? When do we have the time, the money, to travel that distance? Oh. Probably not that often.

Oh... I think I'm losing Eddie. This is what happened to Red. This is the start. We'll see less and less often. Eddie will find new friends. Maybe a girlfriend, a wife. Maybe he'll even have another kid, kids.

We'll end up drifting apart, bit by bit. This is it. I'm losing him. I'm losing him."

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turns out uhaul gays are literally the opposite of uhaul lesbians. build a relationship for six years and then pack your shit up and move away.

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Ways I think the 118 would try to get rid of Gerrard:

- Bringing out the clipboard and let Buck criticizes everything Gerrard does, 'cause the LAFD guidelines say otherwise

- Ravi dropping the Q word everytime Gerrard says something problematic

- Eddie takes up cooking and gives Gerrard food poisoning during the first shift

- Eddie and Buck act like how they usually do (its not intentional, but drives Gerrard crazy)

- Hen and Chimney act like he's not even there, except when they're attending an actual emergency -> but they're the paramedics there so Gerrard can't really give orders to them (everyone else denies that Hen and Chim ignore Gerrard)

- Buck brings in Taylor 'cause she wouldn't turn down an opportunity to make a big report about how a councilwoman placed back a racist and homophobic captain into a diverse house where his previous victims' still there

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another reminder to stop buying/watching/reading anything JK Rowling associated

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woke up thinking about maddie going “it’s the same tommy????” DJFJDJDJSJ she’s literally getting the story by pieces and buck isn’t even a reliable narrator she must’ve been so confused 😭

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“You came? 🥹” “You called 🥰”

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This is so funny 😭

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buck sneaking his way into bobby's heart like

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#The Buck/Bobby Cooking Journey

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Obsessed with how easily Eddie opened up to Buck.

I'm worried about you. Yeah, I'm worried about me, too.

The only way that could've ended up in friction/tense conversation/conflict was if Eddie would've been stubborn and closed off and refused to let Buck in, and Buck matching his stubbornness. But we didn't have that, what we had was

Can I come in? Of course.

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imagine being tommy and you have this little crush on the guy you met at work but you don’t even think anything of it because for all you know he isn’t even into guys but then he just keeps showing up wherever you are but it never goes anywhere until you find yourself standing inside his ridiculously nice apartment trying to solve his jealousy issues that seem to involve you and now you’re like 99% sure he also has a thing for you and so you kiss him and he seems to be really into it but then your first date ends really awkwardly and you leave because you’ve been here before and it’s not something you would like to relive so you tell yourself it’s probably better this way but then he calls you again asking for another chance and you think he’s adorable so of course you agree to give it another try and it ends with you having not only a boyfriend but said boyfriend is also the missing link that reconnects you to the (work-)family you’ve been secretly dreaming to be apart of again for years and suddenly your life is so filled with love all because you picked up a phone call from your old friend and agreed to fly four idiots into a hurricane.

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Telling Buck ‘no’ is like telling a dog not to hump your leg.

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need a full body massage a margarita 400mg of ibuprofen a plate of brownies at least an hour in a jacuzzi and 20,000 dollars cash