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FAT

You are fat!!! stop eating already! Stop crying about your weight and start doing something about it. Crying wont help you lose weight, it just makes you look lame. Fatass, just stop eating.

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This is porn

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Waking up thinner is worth going to bed hungry.

Ana (via to-the-bone-and-back)

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Being skinny isn't just for photos.

Imagine walking down the street or down a hallway and having your thighs breeze past each other without touching. It will be flirtatious, and in the spring all the wind and flowers will just float right through the gap in your thighs. The way you walk will be graceful. Like a delicate angel, a perfect nymph that glides instead of stomps.

Imagine in summer when the aqua waves lap around your waist and nearly knock you over. Your flat waist will be perfect for holding when your friends or family toss you easily into the air and then into the cool water. You’ll wear a bikini proudly, any bikini you want. You’ll feel more comfortable tanning like a goddess when your stomach doesn’t roll around without you doing anything.

Imagine when as Autumn sets in and you think of your crush wrapped in a blanket with you, watching a scary movie together. His hand reaches around you and he can actually touch your other shoulder. He won’t be disgusted with the flab hanging off your limbs like dead weight. And if you’re skinny enough, he may even kiss you.

Imagine being perfect even in winter. While everyone else looks like walking marshmallows in their coats and scarves you’ll still be as small and delicate as the snow falling onto your hair. You will be able to leave little to no footprint in the snow, and they will all see you as a light little bird gliding across the blizzard.

Being skinny isn’t just for pictures. It’s for living without chains that hold you back by the skin, preventing you from having joy in your life. It doesn’t matter when season it is, there is always something that will be better if you are skinny. So don’t give up. And lose that weight.

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20778) I follow a ton of ed blogs because I want my friends to see that and notice something's wrong. They never do though.

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“Some people who are obsessed with food become gourmet chefs. Others get eating disorders.” - Wasted, Marya Hornbacher

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So cute :3 stay safe ~

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50 Calories worth of different fruits 🍓🍇🍏

25 Grapes (50)

1 Orange (45)

2 Passion fruits (34)

60 Blueberries (47)

11 Cherries (47)

12 Strawberries (48)

1 Kiwi (47)

1 Small tangerine (37)

½ Banana (53)

2 Apricots (34)

½ Apple (37)

1 Small nectarine (57)

1 ½ Peaches (57)

1 Small packet of raisins (42)

1 Cup cubed watermelon (48)

1 Asian Pear (50)

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I won’t fail I can’t fail I’ll be skinny when the school starts

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I will be..

- skinny - beautiful - healthy - loved - happy - dainty - thinspo - able to buy clothes and look good - able to wear a bikini - able to wear shorts - easy to pick up - complimented - asked how I lost so much weight By the end of 2017

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I will get thin.

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Mom: You know, you’ve lost a lot of weight this past month…have you been eating recently?

Me:

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Hi.

   Allow me to introduce myself. My name, or as I am called by “doctors”, is Anorexia. Anorexia Nervosa is my full name, but you may call me Ana.

  Hopefully, we can become great partners. In the coming time, I will invest a lot of time in you, and I expect the same from you. 

   In the past you have heard all of your teachers and parents talk about you. You are “so mature,” “intelligent,” “14 going on 45,” and you possess “so much potential.” Where has that gotten you, may I ask? Absolutely no where! You are not perfect, you do not try hard enough. Furthermore, you waste your time on thinking and talking with friends and dawdling! Such acts of indulgence shall not be allowed in the future.

   Your friends do not understand you. They are not truthful. In the past, when the insecurity has quietly gnawed away at your mind, and you asked them, “Do I look….fat?” and they answered “Oh no, of course not,” you knew they were lying! Only I tell the truth. Your parents, let’s not even go there! You know that they love you and care for you, but part of that is just that they are your parents and are obligated to do so. I shall tell you a secret now:  Deep down inside themselves, they are disappointed with you. Their daughter, the one with so much potential, has turned into a fat, lazy, and undeserving girl. But I am about to change all that.

   I expect a lot from you. You are not allowed to eat much. It will start slowly; decreasing of fat intake, reading the nutrition labels, cutting out junk food, fried food, etc. For a while, the exercise will be simple. Some running, perhaps some crunches and some sit-ups. Nothing too serious. Perhaps drop a few pounds, take a little off of that fat tub of a stomach. But it won’t be long before I tell you that it isn’t good enough. I will expect you to drop your calorie intake and up your exercise. I will push you to the limit. You must take it because you cannot defy me! I am beginning to embed myself into you. Pretty soon, I am with you always. I am there when you wake up in the morning and run to the scale. The numbers become both friend and enemy, and the frenzied thoughts pray for them to be lower than yesterday, last night, etc. You look into the mirror with dismay. You prod and poke at the fat that is there, and smile when you come across bone. I am there when you figure out the plan for the day:  400 calories, 2 hours exercise. I am the one figuring this out, because by now my thoughts and your thoughts are blurred together as one.

   I follow you throughout the day. In school, when your mind wanders I give you something to think about. Recount the calories for the day. It’s too much. I fill your mind with thoughts of food, weight, calories, and things that are safe to think about. Because now, I am already inside of you. I am in your head, your heart, and your soul. The hunger pains you pretend not to feel is me, inside of you.

   Pretty soon I am telling you not only what to do with food, but what to do ALL of the time. Smile and nod. Present yourself well. Suck in that fat stomach! Geez, you are such a fat cow! 

    When mealtimes come around, I tell you what to do. I make a plate of lettuce seem like a feast fit for a king. Push the food around. Make it look like you’ve eaten something. No piece of anything… If you eat, all the control will be broken. Do you WANT that? To revert back to the fat COW you once were? I force you to stare at magazine models. Those perfect skinned, white teethed, bone-thin models of perfection staring out at you from those glossy pages. I make you realize that you could never be them. You will always be fat and never will you be as beautiful as they are. When you look in the mirror, I will distort the image. I will show you obesity and hideousness. I will show you a sumo wrestler where in reality there is a starving child. But you must not know this, because if you knew the truth, you might start to eat again and our relationship would come crashing down.

   Sometimes, you will rebel. Hopefully not often, though. You will recognize the small rebellious fiber left in your body and will venture down to the dark kitchen. The cupboard door will slowly open, creaking softly. Your eyes will move over the food that I have kept at a safe distance from you. You will find your hands reaching out, lethargically and like a nightmare, through the darkness to the box of crackers. You shove them in, mechanically, not really tasting but simply relishing in the fact that you are going against me. You reach for another box, then another, then another. Your stomach will become bloated and grotesque, but you will not stop yet. And all the time I am screaming at you to stop, you fat cow. You really have no self control! You are going to get fat.

   When it is over you will cling to me again, ask me for advice because you really do not want to get fat. You broke a cardinal rule and ate, and now you want me back. I’ll force you into the bathroom, onto your knees, staring into the void of the toilet bowl. Your fingers will be inserted into your throat and, not without a great deal of pain, your food binge will come up. Over and over this is to be repeated, until you spit up blood and water and you know it is all gone. When you stand up, you will feel dizzy. Don’t pass out. Stand up right now. You fat cow, you deserve to be in pain!

   Maybe the choice of getting rid of the guilt is different. Maybe I chose to make you take laxatives, where you sit on the toilet until the wee hours of the morning, feeling your insides cringe. Or perhaps I just make you hurt yourself, bang your head into the wall until you receive a throbbing headache. Cutting is also effective. I want you to see your blood, to see it fall down your arm, and in that split second you will realize you deserve whatever pain I give you. You are depressed, obsessed, in pain, hurting, reaching out but no one will listen? Who cares?! You are deserving; you brought this upon yourself.

   Oh, is this harsh? Do you not want this to happen to you? Am I unfair? I do things that will help you. I make it possible for you to stop thinking of emotions that cause you stress. Thoughts of anger, sadness, desperation, and loneliness can cease because I take them away and fill your head with the methodical calorie counting. I take away your struggle to fit in with kids your age, the struggle of trying to please everyone as well. Because now, I am your only friend, and I am the only one you need to please.

   I have a weak spot. But we must not tell anyone. If you decide to fight back, to reach out to someone and tell them about how I make you live, all hell will break lose. No one must find out, and no one can crack this shell that I have covered you with. I have created you; this thin, perfect, achieving child. You are mine and mine alone. Without me, you are nothing. So do not fight back. When others comment, ignore them. Take it into stride, forget about them, forget about everyone that tries to take me away. I am your greatest asset, and I intend to keep it that way.

Sincerely, Your friend Ana

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Tricks of the trade

There’s a lot of crap-lousy tips out there. We need to get some things straight. The tips you’ll see here are some you’ve probably already seen, and others you haven’t. We need to at least attempt to trash the dangerous and useless tips in favor of some more relative information. These are general tips and tricks, like the lists you’re used to. But these have all been researched, tested and tried, and these are reliable. Read on!

Water Yes, the basic of all dieting staples. You should be drinking eight glasses a day at the very bare minimum, but your best best is to drink about 8oz. every hour on the hour. Start with a glass of water as soon as you wake up. I keep a glass by my bed and drink it before I ever get up. Cold water will burn a few minor calories, as it does take caloric energy for your body to warm the water. But it’s marginal, at best. Warm or hot water, however, will make you feel full and curb appetite. Warm water is a great craving remedy, too. NEVER drink tap water. Distilled or filtered would be a little better, but not much. If you can drink pure spring water or osmosis-filtered water, that’d be awesome. Water toxins will screw with your metabolism and hypothalamus (the gland that controls metabolism and cravings) more than anything else. Don’t forget to make your teas and coffees with it, too.

Cravings They royally suck, don’t they? No worries. Ana can help. As mentioned before, warm water can definitely curb cravings. So can gum, peppermint (watch out, though, because there’s 25 calories in a piece of peppermint candy), tea, coffee, and water chugging. Brush your teeth, as this will make food taste funny. The worst I’ve found is Crest for kids. Get the bubble mint stuff that’s only a dollar from the dollar store. The toothpaste itself isn’t nasty, but it makes everything else taste that way. Brush when you get up in the morning, once in midday, and again at night. The anti-cavity fluoride will also help with the acid that erodes your teeth when you purge. Do NOT try crushing the food in your hands and smelling it. That’s a tip that’s circulated around. I’m telling you, smelling a food you’re craving, or even just seeing it, will make you much more likely to eat it. Your best best is to toss it, sabotage it with salt or water or spices, or feed it to the family pet. Smelling or seeing the food will immediately make you salivate, because your mouth is preparing to receive the food. That’s when your brain kicks into high gear and screams at you to eat it. Don’t tempt your body. When all else fails, just walk away.

Hunger. Don’t even kid yourself. Yes, we tell our concerned loved ones we aren’t hungry, but unless you’re emaciated, you definitely get hungry. It’s part of it. Any warm or hot liquids, like chicken broth, bullion, coffee, tea, or warm water will make you feel full if you drink enough. You can water chug, which just means you just chug water until you can’t anymore, or you feel sick. (Careful not to drink so much that you shock your body. People have DIED from drinking too much water in one sitting. Never drink more than two gallons of water a day.) When all else fails, you can pull out a list of safe foods and pick one to go crazy on. Sometimes, you have to. My binges usually include nothing except sugar-free jello. At most, you might take in 200 calories, and that’s if you eat with a shovel. People will eat out of boredom. Occupy yourself with a hobby or a forgotten chore. Chew ice. It gives you a little extra water and distracts your hungry brain. Fiber will make your stomach feel full before anything else will. Invest in some Metamucil (watch the calories in that stuff). And always include fiber-rich foods in your calorie intake. If it doesn’t have fiber, don’t eat it.

Hiding It This can be a very tricky part that I tread on lightly. At a certain point, you don’t want it to be hidden anymore, or need for it to be. But there are times when it’s necessary not to let anyone know what you’re doing. When you’re already fat like I am, it’s not as big of a deal to cover your tracks. But you do want people to think that the weight is coming off in a healthier style. And if you live by yourself, lucky, lucky you… Baggy clothes can hide the weight loss. If you lose weight too rapidly, or if you’re thinner and show weight loss faster, it’s important that you don’t show it off all at once. Leave dirty dishes around. Dispose of leftovers in the refrigerator and leave trace amounts on a plate for whoever you live with to find. Unless you have very specific eating rituals that you simply cannot break, never eat alone. Any allowed caloric intake for that day should be saved to eat in front of other people. Then who can say you’re starving? If you have a dog, bless your soul. Obviously, don’t give your dog anything that can hurt them, like chocolate or grapes. But if your dog begs, you can sneak them food. This is incredibly useful for family dinners that you can’t get out of. Speaking of family dinners, keep a napkin in your lap and drop food into it occasionally. Make sure not to leave the napkin on the plate when you’re done. You’d be surprised at the number of anas that make this mistake. Throw your own napkin away. Don’t try the trick where you spit your food into a glass. Whoever came up with this was stupid. The food floats up, and it’s right there for everyone to see. Seriously, don’t even attempt it. At dinners, do go ahead and eat a few bites, making sure someone is watching you do it. Fake chew now and then while cutting the food into smaller pieces and pushing them around a bit. Talk a LOT. This keeps the thoughts off of you, and your mouth is too busy talking to eat anything. Wear makeup to hide any paleness or dark circles. Your lips WILL chap. Start using a moisturizing chap stick, even if your lips aren’t chapped right now. Rest assured, your time will come, especially if you’re purging.

Purging There comes a time when we’re all going to do it. And if something is worth doing, it’s worth doing right. Purging is an art that it took me years to master. Now, it’s about as simple as using the bathroom, and it’s become about as natural as such, too. So for that reason, these tips might not work for you, or they may unlock your purging potential. Either way, here are some relatively safe purging tips. (Disclaimer:  There is NO SUCH THING as safe purging.) Sip water in between bites to make food come up easier. You can also use a diet soda, as the bubbles will help food come up. Some people swear by chugging one in advance. If you know you’re going to purge, stay away from anything spicy or sharp. Spicy food will burn like hell, and sharp foods like chips or popcorn can potentially cut something that doesn’t need cutting, making your throat or esophagus bleed. Anything will come up with enough water. Remember that. When you think you’ve gotten it all up, drink some water and purge some more. You can get some remaining remnants out that you didn’t even know were in there. Stuff like bread or cake, if not chewed well, will clump together and cause you to choke. Anas and mias have choked to death purging bread. Avoid it like the plague. When we’re binging, we tend not to chew well, anyway. Better safe than sorry. Laxatives about once a month is good for cleaning out your system routinely. But much more often than that, you’re going to build a dependency to them, meaning you won’t be able to poop without them at all. By the time you use laxatives, you’ve absorbed the food, anyway. Why bother? Just puke. Much more efficient. The crap about retaining half the calories you eat despite purging is, like I said, crap. If you look into the details of the study that came up with this theory, you’d understand why. Actually, it’s been proven time and time again that calories aren’t absorbed until they reach the small intestines. All the stomach does is churn and prepare the food for the small intestines, and that can take over an hour depending on the density of the food you ate. Purge within twenty minutes, and you’re good. Keep your fingers in your throat until it’s all gone. The more you pull out, the harder it is to finish the job. Ice cream is every bulimic’s dream food. Eat your fill! It’s a charm coming up again. Very few things are more degrading than having vomit slosh back up and hit you in the face. Put some toilet paper in the bowl to curb that. You can say you’re taking a shower and then just puke in the shower. I do this so I can eat dinner and keep everyone off my back. Just make sure the food is chewed up well enough to go down the drain. Otherwise, you’ve got a lot of explaining to do. Some people use toothbrushes and say not to use the bristle side. But if you use the other side, the angle won’t be right to hit your gag reflex. Use the bristle side, and kinda rub that part of your tongue. A lot of people struggle with purging for years before finding this tip, and it seems to be the magic to the trick.