anime-2lover2 - Tumblr blog

[anime-2lover2]

His Little Big Friend by Soul

I have always found myself surrounded by people who I dislike

People who dislike me for me and what I am and what I resemble most

But sometimes I find a special person or human or tolerable being

Who I don't mind obsessing over or being addicted to or goofing around with

An alien unknown to the foreign terrible ideology of mankind

Humans and beings similar as so hard to find for me

But I worked and I pressed and though depressed I found

Five people who I trusted but I was rusted over from lack of love

I made some mistakes and little peitie mistakes cause earthquakes

Some left but some stayed and my heart and in full support of me they remained

I was so pained to see one go and it broke my heart so bad

I feel to my knees and I just couldn't believe all the strife that I've had

To endure over the years and I assure you there were many tears

But after all the fights and the sob-filled screaming sleeplness nights

I found the one who served as a total healer and teacher for my problems

He was a young boy who goes by he him and why I befriended him I don't know

But he stuck around and I did too so I smiled so big when he said "I love you"

Came really close to him and I could tell with all that's within me he really cared

We were really werid and danced around together and everybody stared

But were so high on the ketamine that is the two of us so we didn't give two fucks

He likes horror movies and Godzilla and singing dancing ducks

His parents are divorced and his cool step dad Chris drives a truck

I felt so lonely and he helped me through a lot and he doesn't even know

So to my good friend who is the only friend who stayed

Are you glad when I annoy you texting you and keeping you up late

You are so funny and so quirky and I can always seem to relate to you

Nothing you could ever say or do besides killing my MC dog would make me leave you

You made a little big friend

A little big friend who'll meet even fatter sadder madder end

It'll be even fucking worse than you could ever contend

But I'm still yo motherfucking little big friend

[anime-2lover2]

I can see right through your warm, hot, steamy exterior

I can see plainly through your steamy, hot, warm anger

I am not a stranger, why are you acting like I am one

I am not a liar, why the hell are you acting as if I'm alike one

I want to be done, I say I am, I claim I am, trying to do things

Trying to motivate, amuse and protect myself, defend myself

Maybe even attempt to repair my mental health, the one you destroyed

P

[anime-2lover2]

You are so cute. A man, a boy, an infant, my baby, a being that defies gravity and science, to him, my retarded and broken hearted ass, formed an alliance. And by alliance, of course, I mean, I fell in love with the alien, and allowed him to sweep me off my feet. Beauty and the beast, according to Polo G, a pretty girl and a gangster, but you ain't stopping, or starting, crime of any sort, you're just in the middle. You've got a good head on your shoulders, you're always in the right, seemingly never wrong, you have an extreme heart of gold, a factor that will forever last long. You smile forever, so bright, white, light teeth, even with the yellow glints, hints of rotten cheese, you still have that face, those dimples, those pimples, that minor pizza face, that thing, those pros and cons that make my heart race. I don't what it is, but when I look at you, I feel so blue, I feel so dead, because you're so pretty, so special, boy, you get in my head, it hurts how lovely you are, I stand in the street, but you save me from the incoming car. Life is subpar, everything is bad, I am so sad, the world is mad, everyone is wrong, you're so offended, I'm sure, but I don't care, I have a cure, look at this man, with the flat hair, and that cold, cool stare that makes your body shake, a true motherfucking earthquake. You get so mad at everything, I do, too, buddy, I ain't blaming you, the world is upside down, there's hatred, racism, and homophobia all around, but the sound of your feet hitting the ground, makes my ears pop, you're like a cop, you could make me do anything, you're my personal law, my personal God. I love you so much, you warm my heart, you warm my soul, a swarm of heat, a certain heat that warms you from neck to feet, that makes you grin, full and grim, I love you so, more than you could ever know. I have commitment issues, trust, too, so forgive me, bro, I am so attracted to you, in love with you, drooling over you, I know I'm crazy, I know I'm wild, I know my mind is backwards, I want to harm myself, hurt myself, kill myself, end it all, but you stand, appalled, disgusted by my suicide, and you tell me to step down, to turn around, and to walk on over to you. I care about you, I love you so much, I give a fuck, you make me flush, my cheeks are pink, red as Zero Two, obsessed with, addicted to, you, I want to do it, I want to jump off. I am no warrior, I am no survivor, I am just a person, a weak thing, I know you are similar, depressed, suicidal, and abused, just like me, we're fucking equal, me and you, I just found someone with similar interests and hobbies and things, and strings and YouTubers and waifus, husbandos and Daz Games and Twitch streamers, you like anime, hentai, and making me so fuckin livid, oh, shit, huh. Fuck you, that's what I always wanted to say, because I love you so, but you're fucking me up, and in my way, fuck you for making me feel loved, fuck you for making me feel invaild, fuck you for being a special kind of person, fuck you for every reason, you committed fucking treason fucking with the Soul Train, you heinous, bitch, sorry bastard, bitch, fuck you for making me feel weak, fuck you for making me feel run of the mill and bleak, fuck you for making me feel like a little girl, fuck you for making me feel strange inside, fuck you for my breaking my heart, fuck you for being the only boy I have ever crushed on, and the only man to who I'd part, my legs to, so fuck you, and fuck you for making Soul Train cry her flat, fat ass off, I am a stupid, ugly, clearly fuckin unworthy son of a bitch, uh, uh, oh.

[anime-2lover2]

I can see right through you

Just so you're aware that you

You are so toxic

You are so fucking fake

I lie awake some nights

Still fighting for equal rights

Pride month ended in a

Massacre because the white men

Came and crashed it

Called all the homosexals shit

Made fun of the blacks and

Set fire to the lesbians

Spat on the Muslims

Sat upon the poor pansexuals

Called the aroromantics invalid

And took a fat shit on the asexuals

Gave they own sexualities

They own gender identities

A pat on the back

Good job

Congratulations

You should be proud

You deserve pride

Smile so wide

Be sure to smile real bright

You did nothing

Didn't go through shit historically

You're white

You're straight

You're cis

You're an easy woman

Everybody loves you

Cause you let everyone know

What you're a-doing

If you catch my drift

Hope the riptide rises on you

And as WILLOW would say

Crash your little transparent soul

You deserve a lump of coal

I will break

And I will crush

Your little pathetic dumb weak stupid 'lil

White man dicks

And short man syndromes

So uneducated

To this day, y'all

I remain undefeated

All these bigots and bitches

Deserve to be seated

I can talk

I can talk major game

I am willing to have a discussion

All these lies and bullshits

That you're a-gushing

Slow down, silly

Why you a-rushing

Stupid obese lunatics

Giving themselves diabetes

And then the second they

Catch sight of a skinny brown woman

Ugh, it's

"She's so fake"

"She's so white"

"She's a hatred symbol"

Nah, you're just mad

You're just sad and you're just bad

And I am glad you are

'Cause I know

I know you got a chip on your shoulder

Move out the way

Dodge that bull

Let you get hit by the boulder

Take the hint

Take the hit

Black lives matter

Honey, I'll surely riot

May be white

May be a cracker

May not know my place

But I sure know my fucking pace

And hoe, I will shout louder

More'll spill that way

And I know you fucking hate it

When liberals and gays

Have something to motherfucking say

Move it, reds

You're in my way

Meet your ends

In my own special way, yay

Are you black

Are you brown

Are you dark

Are you an African American

Are you gay

Are you bi

Are you a homosexual

Are you a Jew

Are you Muslim

Are you a minority

Are you sheltered by the rainbow

Guess what, bitch

You're motherfucking valid

And if you're not, don't stop

Don't stop

You're still strong

You're still right, honey

You're not wrong

Be yourself

No matter who and what you are

You support Trump, fine

You support Biden, alright too

You white

You straight

You cis

You easy

That's fine, sister

Join the party

It's okay

Just don't judge

Just don't hate

Then, to you, I can relate

It's both men, women, and the trans

That I love to date

I'm pansexual, hoe

The yellow means all genders

Pink means chicks

Blue means bitches

Y'all so beautiful, my lovely ladies

Make those straight men have twitches

Snitches get stitches

My heart likes witches

I feel like one, too

I suit that shit, as well, as you

Been around so many women

So comfortable with them

No wonder I'm so attracted to them

Make a bitch wanna eat you, yuh

Now, don't get political

Granny can't take it

Y'know Papa will hate it

Aunt Erin will look away

Put her hands under the table

Text you in agreement

A fact that will put herself to shame

And her parents to dismay

She feeling a certain way

I don't care, though

Don't get political

Don't be so typical

According to

My Republican math teacher

Don't get political

Well, don't call me typical

This America

That country you over glorify

And I have free speech

[anime-2lover2]

" I'm Alone "

I'm manipulative and toxic and controlling and I know how to make friends

Friends who are just as bad and sad and internally mad as I am

Befriending those who are as suppressed and oppressed and depressed as I am

Lending a helping hand to those fake alternatives and goths

Who stare and gawk and squawk about how a shirt and some fishnets aren't enough

To be alternative or mall goth or emo or any of the things we preach

That's a reach because most of us don't even wear the skirts or chokers or the makeup

You're a fake and you're not true so I suggest you make an attempt to shape up

I am alone

We are all who we are and we are what we want to be

I am no child of God and I don't believe but I support and allow Christianity

Love for the trans and the blacks and the gays and the whole ass rainbow

I think that we are equal wether we be trans or cis or male or female

Black lives matter and stop asian hate and if you can't relate to the following

Then I kindly and politely and lovingly suggest you get the fuck off my page

How's it feel for the tables to be turned and have yourself locked in a cage

Imagine if your skin was a little darker you'd be all for the rage

Sickness is real as well as science and it's been proven so ditch it

Ditch it to another white supremacist hate group of white cis men

Who have it all and have always had it all in this country we call home

But for those who pass the vibe check allow my arms to serve as a dome

Allow my embrace to serve as a lovely place for all approved of to hang

My heart is broken with my ugly flat chest slashed open

His name started with a fucking T and the man fucking destroyed me

Ripped my little heart from my chest and he sure got the best of what little I had

I had nothing but nevertheless I made an attempt to share it

Share it with him and love on him cause I know life has been somewhat hard for him

He deserved the world so I fit myself into his life and gave him the world

Thought it was true love and I always wanted to give true love a whirl

He was sweet like vinalla and had tan skin so he was my chocolate swirl

Had the lovely smile that made you giggle and laugh for a long while

Contained that special trait about him that just made him so huggable

His mama didn't treat him right and would lock him outside barefoot at night

They threw him into foster care and his adopted mom treated him like shit

That wasn't it and I fell in love with him so much fucking more

He had such a tough time so I took the chance and decided that it wasn't just fake

It wasn't just pity it was just something shitty inside me that said

This is more than a crush you stupid fat lonely bitch

See the way he makes your chubby cheeks go cherry flush

Notice how he makes you redder than baby Zero Two

Remember when he defended you at recess and made you feel so loved

It's more than a crush and it's so clear that you both give a fuck

Get your nervous shaky ass up and go confess those feelings you've had

You've had them for so long and imagine if you have success with him

That would be such a flawless love song and it'd be so good for you

Could you imagine being so in love with someone and having it be mutal

So I did what my brain told me to and I got into a relationship with you

You and I truly loved each other and we didn't hesitate to make it known

But I must've made some kind of mistake or caused a bump in the road

'Cause you suggested the break up and you know I can't say no to you

We were together for month after month and even my teachers knew

I'm sorry if I did anything wrong or somehow offended you

Because I love you and your leave hurt more than Jiriaya and Obito's death combined

I'm a broken hearted and lonely girl you'll come to find

Packing a wounded and terrible and easily tricked and dirty mind

Seeing you around town doesn't exactly help me at all

I am alone

Fall to my knees and allow myself to be stung by all of the bees

Allow myself to be killed by you

My best friend is a Godzilla fan and he told me to give up on you

He told me to release myself from the psychological chains of control

You've placed me in and it to my best friend I love you and I care

I want to make you aware that when I die I'll die with you on my mind

A homicidal hello and a suicidal goodbye to the Kaiju_kai

You were always there for me when I needed you

I have both commitment and trust issues so I am always scared

But you'd comfort me in just speaking or saying that beautiful "Micheal"

I love you to Kailon my special pal and my gay amigo

If I go in the hospital you promised me that day that you'd pull the plug

You mangy lug--your my best friend

Promise me that you'll serve as my comfort system and comrade 'till the end

And to my parents; dear and good ol' Mom and Dad

Y'all are so good to me and the best friends I've ever had

Yes I am that sad little bitch who's besties with her family

I know I seem lame but I don't deserve all of this fame

My parents do and you'd believe it's true if you were to ever meet them

They pass the vibe check and they are good parents

My dad likes anime and my mom loves the Walking Dead

They ain't got nothing in they heads but good looks and mild smarts

I care about them and I don't want to ever be apart from them

This my offical and registered sorry to them

I hope I die tommrow but these few people in my life who I trust

Make me wish that I was perfectly healthy and safe

They make me wish that the whole didn't have immediate access to my name and my face

I wish I didn't feel this way and I shouldn't because I know I'm loved

Aware that people care for me and that they love me

But everyone seems superior and so above me

I have a superiority complex and an inferiority complex as well

It doesn't help that my ticket to hell is confirmed

I am alone

🥵

[anime-2lover2]

You're my baby and I want to defend you

I would if I could and I can't so it breaks my heart

My mind is sawed in half 'cause you were my other half

I wish I could pick my head off of the floor

Get my chubby ass up and out of the door

Pray that I could heal my old scars and wear short sleeves and revealing clothes

Without somebody telling me to go get help

I wanna be myself

Want to be with you

I am a water dog so I love to swim and drown myself

Love the Dove chocolate and I eat them all so the diabetes will kill me

Tryna give myself a heart attack

I rather go into cardiac arrest than make any sort of confrontation

Wish I got hit by that train

Instead of that man grabbing me by the arm and quote "saving me from the pain"

I hope that train comes back round

And I pray that this time no one will attempt to save my life

Just let me walk out into it

Let me die

I broke my nails and I broke my teeth

My teeth are so yellow and they look like rotten cheese

Only a true one knows what's underneath

A smile of bright and white teeth with a burning light

Life is an endless fight

But unlike most struggles and daily pains it has a mild end

That end is death and death serves as a friend

Most children say sometimes that they have encountered a

A man in a black hood who carries a rusty scythe with blood trickling down

Be in their dreams or out on the street

I wish I could meet those kids

Wish they weren't all dead and underground

Can you hear the sound of my sore throat giving out

Wish I knew what life was about

I pray that there is a greater meaning

[anime-2lover2]

yeah, girl

you're the background on my phone

hey, girl

i love you, and i don't want you to feel alone

oi, girl

you are the best of the best, you're perfected

oh, girl

you ain't got a single flaw, you are the greatest and

i wish i was as fucking awesome as you

i don't want a single nother soul to treat you as awful as i did

you are a one hundred, if there is a God, she did not make a single mistake with you

you are lovely, drool dripping down my chin when you walk the room

love you so much, i'd let you kill me, baby, allow me to meet my doom

know you may not like me no more, girl, and i'm sorry for the way i treated you

now i will defend you, make sure no one treats like you like me

want you to feel special, like a queen, baby, you may ask why, it's cause your royalty

oh, girl, i'm sorry for everything i have ever done

girl, i am sorry, sorry for being such a cunt

i am sorry, for all that was said, it was all untrue, just a reflection of the nothing inside my head

so sorry, baby, one day, maybe you'll forgive me

and i'm sorry for all the love and respect you give, and gave me

you make me feel loved, but i can't make no commitments, so forgive me

want to love you, but there's no room for love in my heart

tell me, babe, why'd a girl like me, dumbass and filled with foolery

make a girl, just like you, feel like the fattest animal in the zoo

cause you're not, girl, you're the best girl, you're my world

i am sorry, can't get my mind off of you

this is my apology song, i don't even seek forgiveness from you

just want you to hear this, and feel real, baby, that's the truth

i am sorry, God's dead, but she didn't do wrong when she invented you

[anime-2lover2]

Gosh darn, god damn

God bless you

A depressed, pansexual

Atheist, with scars

Got someone like you

Inside they car, oh

First, the car's not mine

You're so divine

It's my mother's, I don't lie

Wish I was yours, no subside

In your arms, I reside

In that heart, I always confide

You're so speical

So different, just my type

You're what I like

Say 'fuck you' as a 'hello'

You're my bro, that's a low blow

Wish you were more, though

More to me

But to me, you're Heather

Might not see it, might not believe it

Might think you're ugly

Might think your crazy, oh

Self worth, that's a no

Self harm, approval 'cross the board

Everyone but me, I am there

I am there for you

[anime-2lover2]

she's cold as ice

by Soul

she's colder than the heart that i used to know

told me he loved me and then left so fast

what a cruel and low blow

i want that pretty little woman to know

that i will never leave her and no matter what

i will always believe her

even if she says the most insane and odd of things

even if she says she owns a million gold rings

even if she says she's met the president in person

even if she says that she can read minds

she will always find love in me

because that love is like no man; for it will never leave

she just needs to believe

that my heart and soul truly yearns for her to be free

for her to not be sad and crying on those knees

those tears in those beautiful eyes

that red dripping down her lovely thighs

her period pain and those cramps in her chest

those emotions that make her doubt if she's the best

it's her -- the one and only and in true color

who i love; and i want her to be the mother of my future kids

don't you wish you were mine; imagine all the things we could've did

would've treated you like an angel

all that sadness and somewhat numbness you felt

i would wish it and kiss it all away

it's only a bad day or week or month or year

don't shed that tear; let me wipe it from your pretty face

live for that pretty race your heart does

i breathe for every move that body of yours does

love the way you make me feel

i want to make you and hear you say

that you and your wonderful self feel the same way

but you're so cold to me and mean to me

you shut me off; such treachery

absolute and undeniable tyranny

let me hold you; don't let another tear flow

cause i want you to know

i ain't petty and wanting you for your body

it's just your alluring personality and the way you treat me

you have so much value; you wouldn't understand

you don't what you mean

what you mean to me

you got muplite personalities and a case of bipolar disorder

you say 'fuck you' in place of "hello"

how low can you go

i don't care; i would go anywhere with you

i want to make you feel special

you're no Karen; it won't stop caring about you

you may not feel or seem or look or act like it

but you're Heather for me

you're Heather in my book

no matter the weather; it was my breath that you took

you're cold as ice

you're not exactly nice but i still love you

love everything you do

[anime-2lover2]

I'm tired of loving people, so don't mind me if I shut off. Shut off communications, how much clearer can I make that it that I want you to fuck off? It's nothing personal, no, nothing personal at all, because I treat everyone like this, my brains splatter aganist the wall. Hate people, I'm a human hater, in terms of social skills, I fit the category of cannibalistic, cause I don't give a shit. Believe me, at one point, I sure did, but not now, so shut the fuck up, 'fore I flip my lid. Been sad since I was a little kid, didn't even know why, I reflected depression at the age of five, didn't why I was alive, felt light on my feet. At night, I would try to hang myself, pig squeaks, and the bright red and blue shines on my feet. I wanted to run away with her, hold her hand, dance with her, hide from the police with her, I wanted to kill with her, now, I dream of killing her. I gave her my all, she's a player, so it's not my fault, but it feels like it is, it sure as hell resembles it, wish I didn't love her so much, wish I didn't get go fooled, bitch. She a witch, a vampire, she's not a good girl, she lights fires, but I still liked her, silly me, still befriended and dated her, golly gee. Feel so scared, shaking, in my pants, I got pee, what can I say, it's exhilarating.

[anime-2lover2]

It hurts so bad when you fall for someone just for them to dismiss themselves when your back is turned.

Aware of the truth and all that the truth holds and love isn't average so it can't fit any mold.

But then why is there standards for love and requirements for it to be justified and okay?

If our way of loving as humans has gone beyond normal why are certain forms of love abnormal?

Why do people say that love makes you strong because it's not - it's a motivator until it ends or pauses or worsens dramatically.

Love is similar to life in the fact it could really bad and have ups and downs and still manage to turn itself around.

It could get better or better for the worse and it may hurt but the only thing you can do is put your hands together and pray for improvement.

They say most boys love girls who can move it but what if you're flat as a billboard and have nothing to move?

Bodies are built certain ways and some boys and girls don't understand that things are the way they are because they're meant to be.

They can change a little and sure that girl's chubby - but what's wrong with a little cushion?

What's wrong with his yellow teeth or her flat ass or his fat ass or that person's gender identity?

How can mere looks impact love - a thing that goes beyond regular and standard-fitting humanity?

Love is something that goes past society's boxes but somehow in hell don't receive hate for it.

It makes me despise love because not only I am deprived of it and it never happens for me so I have to act like it.

[anime-2lover2]

I wish I could be what my grandmother and grandfather want me to be.

I could be a heterosexual girl with straight long hair and good grades.

I could be a girl dating a boy and not trying to date the girl in my elective.

I could be a cisgender woman who doesn't go by multiple pronouns.

I could listen to Christan rock and not Corpse Husband and J-Pop.

I could be normal and fit into the boxes that is society.

I could be causal and blend into the crowds that want nothing to do with me.

I could hold the hand of a man and then proceed to suck his dick.

I could watch Grey's Anatomy and not hentai and Shojo Tsubaki.

I could be a normal human and not fall in love with fictional men and women.

Or I could be who I truly am and you could be less of a dick.

Because I may not be proud of my true identity and who I turned out to be.

But who I am and what I strive to be is not the business of thee.

[anime-2lover2]

my coming out song 🧸

by soultrain._.403._.

thank you for listening ;

i can hear you talking about God and Jesus and the Lord.

i can already hear you saying no and denying and doubting it.

but if i don't deny nor doubt or even consider anything else than it.

but i find pride and comfort and all of these good things in my choice.

does it really even matter?

does it really even affect you?

sure you won't have a great husband in law or grandchildren to run around with.

but you'll be so old and crippled and dead you won't be able to run.

won't be capable of it and you'll make fun of this very day when.

i totally one hundred percent give up my quote on quote "gay phase".

you claim i'll let it go and just give up and shut up and marry a man.

well that's not exactly my plan but i hear you out.

if you think i'll give up on my quote "gay phase" then why don't you.

give up on that marriage that's clearly fucking failing?

why don't you give up on that pale skin white boy who you claim will be railing?

railing me by the time i hit thirty five years of age?

homophobia upon your end locks me in a psychological cage.

i just wanted appreciation from you.

maybe a quick "congratulations" or "thank you".

because my sexuality is the truth and i'm tired of lying to you.

tired of saying i am straight little cis girl.

if i am not a straight little cis girl would i still be your little girl?

a grandchild is supposedly grand but being queer is not grand to you.

i would never consider myself a child to your genes or to such a trash sperm.

you are my father's parent set so i figure the term "the apple doesn't fall far from the tree" was misplaced in your son.

for your son is so much better than you.

so much more noble and respectable and so much more of a teacher.

the apple might as well have fallen from a berry tree.

because i know for a fact that he is much more loving and accepting.

ashamed i am to be connected by blood to such a foul source.

but nevertheless despite all of this mahogany i still care.

i still love you and my love remains there despite your will.

will to stop and root against the queer.

for i am queer and we as an umbrella term are here and here to stay.

get used to my dear and beloved grandparents.

this is my coming out song and my gayness with forever last long.

you may doubt me at the time and for that i do not blame you.

it's hard to comprehend someone believed to be straight for so many years is the exact opposite so I apologize.

apologize for dropping this on your head so quick and suddenly and out of the blue.

but I once heard a beautiful and luscious person phrase it like this:

a life of Ken and Barbie and a lovely blossoming romance.

what if the romance isn't between Barbie and Ken but another?

ken and Ken and Barbie and Barbie.

what if it's not Ken but Barbie?

do you expect me and accept me to say sorry?

i won't and I abstain of doing so cause I have a passion.

a passion for me and teaching those I am not what I used to be.

this is my coming out song and my gayness will last forever long.

might be hard to believe but i am prideful enough to not get on my hands and knees to say this.

i am pansexual and attracted to all genders despite what you say.

in every single way i have pride and am so proud of myself.

never took the time to perfect my mental health but i did perfect this.

and that is my love for my sexuality.

[anime-2lover2]

Well, you're so nice, and oh, you're so special, but to those who haven't heard that before, you're not stupid, invalid, or a whore, this is system is a bore, but nevertheless, a chore, and a task, to take upon, us, those who are above average mental health, or those of us, who are below said average, to take the stand, and hold the hand of those, who are weakened, are sad, and cry they hearts out, cause nobody told 'em they were special, like the believers do, like the non believers do, like everybody do, yeah, like everybody does, but not to you, because sure, the system is flawed, but people say that a lot, so what could that really even mean, but hey, listen, it does actually have some meaning, just depends on how you phrase it, you matter, your bodies are matter, but you, yourself, matters, that's what they say, but it's hard to believe, especially on a bad day, such as today, cause every day seems like a bad day, socially, physically, mentally, psychologically, sadly, it's seems true, haunts children, teens, and adults, too, this way, this debate, how we feel,

[anime-2lover2]

Forbidden asthethic ? By Soul

i can see and hear you from beyond my shallow grave

i can see and take note of each and every single mistake

i know you are one to take risks and it kind of scares me

you make me fearful but despite this i still believe you're wonderful

you excite me and exhilllrate me and every thought i have ever had

you make me feel so happy but then again no one could make me sadder

my best friend is like no other and no one could make me madder

my best friend has the ability to mess with and screw with me

my best friend can make me smile but can also make me cry for a while

my best friend makes me feel as if someone gives a shit

and even a single shit is enough to keep me alive for the night

and even though i have loving and somewhat tolerable parents

and despite all the love they continue to give and i continue to receive

and even though i have a good friend who swears he'll never leave

i still can't trust anyone and everyone still can't trust me

i want to be loved and trusted and worshipped by all

i want to be famous and stay it and remain that way

i want everyone to know my name and i want to be president

i want to have a bunch of snakes and lizards and reptiles

i want to be myself and show everyone else that i exist

i want to prove my existence upon these small Republicans

crying and dying in the middle of the night is done

crying and wishing i was dead doesn't exist no more

crying and praying for the death of us all is invalid

crying over Donald Trump is okay now cause the mofo's gone

forbidden asthethic and a mild headache that kills

forbidden aesthetic and a wild headache that sends chills

forbidden relationship and stay inside my girl's arms

forbidden relationship and i remain inside of her arms and heart

oh

oh

[anime-2lover2]

i can feel my heart breaking when i see a single tear in your eye

when a single drop of liquid exits from your lovely pupil

my tears start to fall as well and i join you in crying

we celebrate and enjoy feeling so dead inside because

there are people who are always joyful and can't feel at all

and even though most are appalled by sadness and incompleteness

you and i join one another in worshipping it and it completes us

we look so cute and aesthetic that people want to be us

aspire to be like and look like us and model after us

the aesthetic is a vibe she claims and it's unfortunate

imagine pretending to be and modeling to be somebody else

you're lovely and perfect and beautiful and just the way you are

the way you are shall be the way you remain

being another is oppressing and suppressing yourself

it only brings pain to your mental health and worsens you

if you seek an aesthetic friendship find your own

mind yourself and your own self and no one else

think of yourself is a first and takes top priority

make a friend and model your own damn aesthetic

don't pretend to be the two of us or you'll get banged

we are about to throw some hands and fist these palms

it's not that hard to smack a bitch by the side of the head

not that hard to abort an unborn baby because i'm heartless

it's easy to do a lot of things when you lack a heart

dance with me because i know you a true one

feel the soul of the train leave the body of soul train

take all of your love and put in a basket of no love

fill it to the brim and then pour all the love and affection away

it's not worth it and it's worthless to give a shit

just tell me again and repeat yourself so i can hear

i have the hearing of an abused man with no eardrums

but i will pound on those drums for you to hear me

make a fool of myself so that you can hear and witness thee

thee making a fool of a person that you didn't evenison to be

such a fucktard and a dumbass and a brainless peasant

peanut and no nut November failed attempts

gasping at the beefcake panty hose and telling your mom she's adopted

put on her Spanx and i might have to give her a spank

that's my friend and her name starts with a J

can you make a guess about her and her utter perfection

look in the mirror and check out the reflection

do you have the complete and full protection of me

me and my sister friend and my best friend 'bout to commit a robbery

a straight-up and deadass felony where people drop like flies

commit a murder and shoot a girl in the head with no lies

clock a woman in the brain and twist her hair 'till she dies

that's my friend right there with a pretty smile on her face

her name is Jayla and i would run a race for her

that's saying something because i am fat and i would lose

but despite that i would still try for a girl as special as her

she's special and the response to that is unknown

told her and confessed to her that i find her adorable

find her delicious and my feelings for her are ridiculous

i am a woman so therefore i must go pop my vagina to a guy

must go fist a grown man in the mickey d's parking lot

i live in Trump's america as a female so it's required by law

no black people or asians can breathe without being shot

or smothered or pounded or flattened or stepped upon

walked on for having an opinion and breathing and being ddifferent

what the fuck did i ever do to live like this and be treated like you

i breathed and lived and existed so that's my apology

existence of which i am sorry for and owe you a shout out to

to which i underappreciate and don't act upon

but what the fuck is even going on for you to say white lives matter

when in the hell have we ever been suppressed to the point of nonsense

how the hell did we ever get oppressed and it makes no sense

why did we kill off all of the Native Americans

why and where did we start hating on dark skins

this genuinely doesn't make any motherfucking sense to me

but then again all the dumbness Trump spills doesn't apply either

he isn't hiding from Biden and he's truly hiding from us

us is an umbrella term for the gays and the blacks and the trans

hiding from his precious foolish life decisions

Trump committed severe tax fraud for several years

the entirety of his presidency made us cry real life tears

we wasted our water prectange on you so now we must rid of you

a painful and sorrowful and everlasting goodbye i bid to you

my best friend is a gay boy and to him you say every day

that his life doesn't matter and that homosexuals are unequal

you claim homosexuals are on a different level and that i agree with

homosexuals are valid and you are on a level of stupid

this might be biased because i'm a gay and friends with one but

a large percent of the world is LGBT so shape up or ship out Trumpy

every day that Trump gets on that microphone he tells another lie

another lie about gays and about straights

about black men having heart attacks but really got a bullet in they back from a puffy piggy

he says it's a good day for George but the mofo's dead

the guy is all dried up and has the air and oxygen stomped from his head

you say blue lives matter and you respect this

and I just want to say a brief fuck you to Derek

i am a soul train and a soul train in so much fucking pain

my sister friend is a blessing and i am good to have her

my best friend is a legend and i am good to have him

let's go and yeah and cheese burger and ham burger

i want to be yours and crave for the days to never be over

suck on that plastic penis and shove it inside you

then proceed to expect me not to fucking lie to you

[anime-2lover2]

when the stars sprinkle my room like chocolate sauce on a cake

i lie alone or alone as i assume in my bedroom wide awake

scars litter my body like trash on the ground and baby me in the surround sound

wounds coat my arms and legs and i could use being pushed down a peg

my best friend is almost tired of me and sometimes i can tell he's not listening to me

want to be with my best friend until the very end of time tonight but at the same time it hurts

it hurts to be with someone that long even as a friend because it brings back old emotions

old emotions from precious friendships that ended quicker than a fnaf jumpscare

i want to be with a good friend who truly fucking cares and i know that's him

he's my soulmate not in love way and i know that no matter what i'll stick with him

goes on forever me and him and no matter the rut we're in we always seem to prevail

when we're together and beside each other we never seem to fail

i will hold his hand through the toughest and roughest of times

will be there for the man until me and he and all of the world drops dead

'till we kick the bucket shall we be united my friend

but anyway i know for a fact of the matter that we are all matter but i do not matter

if i die i will cut my head off and put it on a platter and serve it to him

he's really gruesome and violent and likes horror movies so it'd amuse him

and the last thing i would do is abuse him and leave him permanently alone

i care about the stupid little boy and don't want him to be left on his own

just him and his lonesome is really a bad thought and suicide is an even worse one

it feels good imagining myself cremated in a necklace around my best friend's neck

i will stay in that little jar and him i swear to forever protect

oh my best friend who swears he'll never fucking leave

and this guy seems to genuinely mean that shit

my bestie who'll protect me and i will do the same for him

i still have your hat and i will wear it from beyond the grave

when i die i just hope you don't sorrowfully grieve

i want you to be happy and not cry on those pretty boy knees

give a shit yes i do and love or not you will always be my boo

hold my hand and i will hold yours even if the fucking house burns

i will run through hell with lil nas on my ass to save your mom or you or your dogs

will be there for you no matter the situation

no problem man you and i are the solution

if you leave me it'll all spiral and become problematic

all this fuck up bullshit is kind of anticlimactic

be my friend forever and i swear i won't be too dramatic

just belong to me as my bestie and a single fuck i promise not to give

don't leave me ever because your special to me bitch

when the stars sprinkle my room like chocolate sauce on a cake

i lie alone or alone as i presume in my bedroom wide awake

Oh

Oh

Oh

I can hear you calling from afar because I have that bond

That special and somewhat undeniable connection

Something unbreakable and undeniable no matter the ccircumstance

My old friends left me and hated me and tried to kill me

But despite all that B.S. you befriended me nevertheless and you stayed

You stayed despite knowing full well of my trauma and you belonged

Belonged to another friend who you stopped talking to and got sad over

Nevertheless I stayed beside you and I feel that's saying something

Kindness on both sides was the inspiration behind our efforts to stay together

I wasn't that good to you but you were plenty good to me darling

Sure there is a gender difference and sure we hit each other

But we care for one another and sure as hell love each other

We won't say it aloud though because in truth there's no need

I will remain beside you when you try to foolishly leave this place

Will hold your body in place while you bleed to preserve you

You're such a special and ironic and unique man I don't deserve you

But nevertheless I became friends with you and we still are to this day

To God I pray despite being atheist that it remains that way you and i

Oh

Oh

Oh

This is the end and the end of music I can never seem to stop

The words just come out and flow and to you my bestie I propose

Will you be my bro